Two_rolling_black_eyes

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Two_rolling_black_eyes

Community Member

Two_rolling_black_eyes

Community Member

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1 posts

4.5K comments

7.5K upvotes

27.4K points

Learned comic timing from Rocket Raccoon but Tian Tian hates my jokes. Applying to be on the Masked Singer but I still need voice lessons.

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My Pandas

Two_rolling_black_eyes • upvoted an item 8 months ago

How Is That Even Possible???

Two_rolling_black_eyes • upvoted 3 items 9 months ago

40 “Amazing Maps” That May Give You A Unique Perspective On The World (New Pics)

That's really cool.

Gigi Hadid Makes Relationship With Bradley Cooper Official, Fans Brutally Call Out Major Age Gap

Is this for your TMZ resume?

40 “Amazing Maps” That May Give You A Unique Perspective On The World (New Pics)

That's really cool.

Gigi Hadid Makes Relationship With Bradley Cooper Official, Fans Brutally Call Out Major Age Gap

Is this for your TMZ resume?

50 Thoughts You Might Not’ve Had In The Shower Yet But Could Occupy Your Brain Next Time You’re There

Nice thought.

Show All 3 Upvotes

Two_rolling_black_eyes • upvoted 20 items 10 months ago

People Are Posting The Funniest Memes To This Facebook Page And These 50 Are Hilarious

I can't unsee this!

50 Funny Memes That Feel Like Putting On Lip Gloss While Plotting Revenge (New Pics)

First of all, I'm sorry. I really am, but for a second I thought it was Queen Elizabeth as I was scrolling it upwards to look

People Are Posting The Funniest Memes To This Facebook Page And These 50 Are Hilarious

I can't unsee this!

50 Funny Memes That Feel Like Putting On Lip Gloss While Plotting Revenge (New Pics)

First of all, I'm sorry. I really am, but for a second I thought it was Queen Elizabeth as I was scrolling it upwards to look

These 30 Companies Screwed Around, Found Out, And Lost Customers Forever

BP sure does love regurgitating 5 year old Reddit threads

31 Things That Look Awesome In Movies But Are Terrible In Real Life

But of course it is! If you want to dance in the rain, pouring rain is the best

Woman Confused Why Her Mom Doesn’t Help With Kids, Tackles Modern Grandparenting Double Standards

You are supposed to allow them to see him and spend time with him, NOT expect them to babysit/watch him. As in, you're supposed to be present and caring for his needs.

Woman Confused Why Her Mom Doesn’t Help With Kids, Tackles Modern Grandparenting Double Standards

I agree with the notion that having family (and hopefully community) support makes raising kids easier and more enriching for the children. However, I am also on board with the basic concept of not breeding outside your means. If you MUST rely on others to raise a child, then you're not ready to start breeding, and shouldn't do so. To make tiny humans and then complain about feeling entitled to free childcare is wholly selfish and immature.

Woman Confused Why Her Mom Doesn’t Help With Kids, Tackles Modern Grandparenting Double Standards

So you think your mother and stepfather should be obligated to spend time with/watch your son for "longer than 15 minutes"? Your son is your child, not theirs.

Woman Confused Why Her Mom Doesn’t Help With Kids, Tackles Modern Grandparenting Double Standards

Boomers were the last generation for whom birth control was not always an option, and many of them made it VERY clear how much they didn't want the kids they were ~stuck with ~... Not sure why anyone's surprised they don't want the grandkids either.

Woman Confused Why Her Mom Doesn’t Help With Kids, Tackles Modern Grandparenting Double Standards

A lot will be down to individuals , but there are a lot of trends at play as well. Your grandparents were likely a lot younger than your parents when they were taking on childcare etc. Kids were a lot less supervised. Parents didn't give instructions/make demands in the same way to the grandparents. But also the boomer generation isn't community minded for the most part, that's why we are in the mess of the world we are in. Also many of them had kids due to social pressure and don't enjoy kids when you could yell/smack etc to get them to do what you want. But the main thing I see is how much time the grandparents want to spend with the grandchildren is usually about their relationship with the parents.

"So Cruel": White Lotus' Star Aimee Lou Wood Claps Back At SNL For Making A Mockery Of Her

And then again, if she’s insecure about her teeth, there’s this thing called braces. Personally I feel like if she fixed her teeth, it would be Jennifer Grey’s nose all over again… I like her teeth, makes her stand out.

50 Hilarious Memes From ‘Sarcasm Daily’ To Help You Forget Your Problems For A Bit (New Pics)

Not as bad as, "You want to withdraw all $3?"

30 Random Images That Don’t Need To Make Sense To Be Funny

Mistakes were made

Curiosities

Random-Funny-Images-Chortle-Humor

Funny-Today-Years-Old-Memes

Curiosities

Random-Funny-Fb-Memes-Life-Pics

Insiders Share 30 Industry Truths The Public Often Isn't Even Aware Of

Fixing software they did not write is part of most programmers job description. Otherwise you would be like a mechanic who can’t fix cars not built by him/her.

IlluminationRock reply

Mechanical Engineers aren't mechanics.

Everyone seems to think that I'm the guy to come to when their car is having problems. Like, yeah, I could figure out how to fix this and know what's going on... But really, you should probably ask the guy who does this s**t *everyday*, he is the expert here. Also, you don't want to pay an engineer to fix your car.

hollycrapola reply

Programmers (generally) can’t fix computers. Or software they did not write. Sometimes not even the software they wrote.

Show All 20 Upvotes

Two_rolling_black_eyes • commented on 10 posts 10 months ago

Parkinson's patients are a fall risk. Most of the d***s to treat it also cause constipation. Your intestines move stuff using involuntary muscles. These straps allow someone with a fully functioning mind to spend time in an embarrassing place without someone watching them.

There's no shame in recognizing we have limits in things we enjoy. I will never have the height or athletic ability of an NBA star so it was unreasonable for my parents to expect me to reach that league. No amount of practice will make me 6 inches taller. However, it doesn't mean I didn't play after school with my friends or 30 years later in pickup games at the gym (still picked last). I also have stubby fingers and no reflexes so I will never play the piano at Carnegie Hall. Piano lessons as a kid means I can still fill in and butcher the hymns on Sunday morning when the real talent comes down sick.

Mom Lets Kids Know Why They Can’t Hang Out With Her Daughter, Turns Them Against Their Parents

I think someone is a bad parent and the other parents don't trust their kids around them. A day drinker in the pick-up line. That or her precious little daughter is a spoiled brat who they don't want hanging around their kids. We all know a "precious little Suzy" whose mom knows can do no wrong but every other parent knows they bite.

Show All 10 Comments

Two_rolling_black_eyes • commented on a post 11 months ago

30 Things That Were Hyped But Truly Deserved The Praise

I've experiences many of the things on this list and can confidentially say this should be #1. I already have tickets to Iceland in '26 for my 4th total eclipse and hopefully the ultimate eclipse. There is a decent chance for northern lights during it.

Two_rolling_black_eyes • upvoted 5 items 11 months ago

Curiosities

Jojo Siwa

potterMathWho reply

Seeing a solar eclipse in totality it was amazing! 11/10 would recommend to a friend.

Curiosities

Jojo Siwa

potterMathWho reply

Seeing a solar eclipse in totality it was amazing! 11/10 would recommend to a friend.

Two_rolling_black_eyes • submitted a new post 4 years ago

Hey Pandas, What Is The Smartest And Stupidest Thing You Recently Heard From The Same Person?"

Two_rolling_black_eyes • submitted 4 list additions 2 years ago

Even in at will states, if your employer reduces your hours to zero, you are considered fired/laid off and eligible for unemployment. They have the right to do it but they can't have it both ways. Attempts to claim you are still an employee is illegal and the employer can be found liable for their practices.

Answering the "why not javascript?" question. COBOL is still the fastest and most stable language for processing massive amounts of transactions, particularly financial ones. It does one thing but it was perfected 50+ years ago and nothing is faster yet. A company like VISA is doing 65,000 transactions per second and that speed and accuracy is paramount. The 1875 thing - May 20, 1875 was when the first ISO standardization was implemented in Paris. By using that as "0", the same date could be used across systems and countries to calculate.

30 Memes And Jokes About Everything Programming And Computer Science (New Pics)

I worked in a 25 building datacenter with 3K employees. The 4 person deskside support team charged an extra $50 cash + travel time (25 buildings often means a 20 min one way walk pulling a bag with parts and replacements) if they showed up and just plugged it in or pushed the power button. I personally witnessed an office mate swear the power button on his monitor always turned on his laptop when they connected to each other.

40 Of The Funniest Tweets From February 2025

Six years of faculty and ex-students trying to kill you and no one believing you. You're finally forced to leave. No way a sane person ever steps foot there again.

“I Just Have To Tell You Something…”: Woman Shocked At Coworker’s Audacity

The opposite of love isn't hate, its apathy and it's the best revenge. Hate is still strongly caring about someone else. By going out of the way to spite him, they are still providing him agency because his comment changed the poster's appearance and behavior. They should wear the level of makeup and spend the amount of effort to do it that makes them happy as if the other person never existed.

Two_rolling_black_eyes • commented on a post 12 months ago

This Online Group Exists To Shame Overconfident Know-It-Alls Who Incorrectly Correct Other People (New Pics)

#1 Bad chart based on bad data. For instance, several of the countries shown on the "least religious" aren't and most of the big hitters (like China) from that category aren't shown. #2, Correlation is not causation. Singapore is both one of the most religious and most peaceful countries in the world. Ukraine War is between 2 countries with the same faith. The 8 decade old war in Myanmar is ethnonationalist groups wanting independence. Religious wars (Gaza) are going on but breaking the peace usually goes back to power and land envy. Nazi Germany used the Jews as a scapegoat for WW2 but they didn't try to invade the UK and North Africa over a religious disagreement.

Two_rolling_black_eyes • commented on a post 1 year ago