Mom Lets Kids Know Why They Can’t Hang Out With Her Daughter, Turns Them Against Their Parents
Being a parent comes with its own rollercoaster of fun and responsibilities. Sure, you get to plan adorable playdates, pack lunches for school picnics, and watch your kid’s face light up at a surprise treat. But then there are the tricky parts, like when other parents don’t exactly see eye to eye with you. Whether it’s silent judgments, unspoken cliques, or passive-aggressive decisions, navigating the parent social scene can be harder than it looks.
That’s exactly what happened to one single mom who opened up about how a small group of mothers at her child’s school were going out of their way to exclude her 8-year-old daughter from parties and playdates. The twist? The kids absolutely adored her daughter. But instead of matching the pettiness, the mom chose kindness and cleverness. She planned a surprise birthday outing that left both the kids and their parents completely speechless. Keep reading to find out what happened, it’s equal parts heartwarming and jaw-dropping.
Kids are usually fiercely loyal to their friends, and their bond can be incredibly strong and genuine
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
A single mom shared how she decided to take the high road after other parents excluded her daughter from parties and playdates
Image credits: teksomolika (not the actual photo)
Image credits: dikushin (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Independent-Let-7688
As kids, it’s often hard to tell if your parents are being simply strict or genuinely toxic
Growing up, we’ve all had those classic run-ins with our parents. Maybe they didn’t get you that cool toy, or they gave you ‘that look’ when you mentioned a career in gaming. While a bit of back-and-forth is normal in any household, things can get unhealthy when the pattern turns toxic. Some parents cross lines that go far beyond harmless scolding. And if it’s constant, it can really affect how you see yourself. That’s when it’s worth asking: is this just strict parenting or something more?
One of the big red flags of a toxic parent is relentless criticism. It doesn’t matter if you aced a test or cleaned your room; they’ll find a way to nitpick. Over time, this chips away at self-esteem and makes you second-guess even your wins. Everyone deserves to feel proud of themselves sometimes. And when praise is a rare visitor, it’s a problem. Validation shouldn’t feel like a reward you have to earn with perfection.
Toxic parents can also be masters of manipulation. From guilt-tripping to emotional blackmail, they’ll twist things until you feel like the bad guy. Ever heard “after all I’ve done for you”? That’s the classic line. It creates a weird cycle of obligation and guilt that’s hard to escape. Real love doesn’t come with a receipt.
Another sign? They don’t respect your boundaries, like, at all. Maybe they go through your things, push you to do stuff you’ve clearly said no to, or expect to be involved in every life decision. Boundaries are basic respect, not rebellion. If your space and choices don’t feel safe around them, it’s not okay. A parent should build your trust, not bulldoze it.
Emotional unavailability is another tough one. You come home after a bad day hoping for comfort, and you’re met with indifference or cold responses. It’s like trying to hug a brick wall. You may end up bottling your feelings or avoiding vulnerability altogether. Everyone deserves a safe place to be heard, especially from the people who raised them.
And let’s not forget excessive control. Toxic parents might try to micromanage every part of your life, from your clothes to your college to your social circle. It can leave you feeling powerless or unsure of how to make decisions on your own.
Psychologist Chivonna Childs, PhD, hits the nail on the head in a Cleveland Clinic piece. “Your parents are your introduction to the world,” she explains. “What we see in their behavior feels normal—until around age five or six.” By the time a child begins to understand something’s off, a lot of emotional wiring is already set. And untangling that as an adult? Whew, not easy. But it is possible.
Healing from the effects of toxic parenting can be a tough, emotional, and deeply personal journey
The good news? You’re not stuck in the past. As an adult, you can unlearn those toxic patterns and choose something better for yourself. Start by giving yourself time to heal, this stuff runs deep. Reflect, journal, talk to a therapist, whatever helps. You don’t have to carry your childhood forever. You get to put it down and move on.
Setting clear, healthy boundaries is a powerful next step. Say no without guilt. Create distance if needed. Boundaries aren’t punishments, they’re protection. You don’t owe anyone access to your life, especially if that access brings hurt. You get to decide who stays in your circle and under what terms.
In the specific case, people were understandably torn. On one hand, it’s hard to watch a child be left out or treated unfairly. On the other, many saw this as a symptom of toxic parenting and control. What do you think? Did the problem start with the grown-ups?
Some people praised the author’s graceful response, while others expressed concern about the long-term impact
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Share on FacebookSomething is off about OP story and she’s kind of humble brag a few times in her message and responses to commenters. I personally it has nothing to do with the 8yo child, OP sounds like someone who called or think themselves “nice woman”. I feel bad for the children, they shouldn’t be exposed to this type of drama at that age, or any age really.
Something? She's gotta be the most annoying woman to roll thru here. "MY daughter is the popular kid! Everybody loves her! Everybody loves me too! I dated a cheating hunk, that's why these women are mean! They want my cheating hunk! Has absolutely nothing to do with me, I'm perfect! Not my problem if they can't see that." She seems like the type of person you get the urge to kick mid-sentence.
Load More Replies...The humble brag is not even subtle in this one and she circles back in the comments to how the single mothers fawn over the man she used to date but she doesn't think "they stand any chance". She sounds like a competitive red flag
Trying to see things from another perspective here. The mothers could indeed fawn over the guy. It happens. And being modest about things that happened don’t make anyone a better person. D**n, I even know some girls who are slightly competitive who are very caring and loyal.
Load More Replies...I hope this is made up; otherwise, if it's the OP's truth....OP is delusional and they don't trust their kids around the mother. The child is so popular that OP hints she stopped bullying in class. They know for a fact that children are throwing tantrums at home, in the homes of people who exclude you, and you're the reason. You live in an affluent area but an indoor playground is so fancy that you imply most can't afford to really go. You will see the children more than their parents in a few years once they can't be controlled...like wtf
This story is off. How is a quiet 8 year old who hates attention single-handedly stopping bullying in the class? Why hasnt OP said to the mothers, "Hey, my daughter wants to play with your daughter and you always say no. Can I ask why? Did something happen I should know about?" She obviously is able to message them
It sounds off, but I can answer one point. My little brother was a really chilled and easygoing character. Aged 7, he was in class. The teacher asked them all, "Who is your friend, who is always there for you, who will always help you when you need it?". It was a Catholic school, so the answer was "Jesus". The whole class of miniature beings turned as one to point to my brother and and answered "Benjamin!" (not his real name).
Load More Replies...Yes I agree. I'm technically on her side, but the identical unvarying repetitions of her virtuousness have raised my hackles, and also a sense that something is off.
Load More Replies...I think the other women shun OP's daughter because they dislike OP. Maybe they think of her as competition for male attention or maybe her ex (whom they know) has talked badly about her.
I found it more than a little offputting the number of times the OP brought up the ex thing.
Load More Replies...Talk about your creative writing exercises... this woman knows nothing about 8yos. And thinking that their mothers won't have a say in what they're doing in ~just 2 or 3 years~? Yeah right... she started out with an imaginary story about teenagers and then forgot to edit it when she decided that 8yo's would make a better sob story.
It seems really cruel to intentionally engineer a situation where your daughter's friends won't be there for her birthday. Even if she truly thinks that creating this conflict between the girls and their mothers is for the best for those kids in the long run... now your daughter gets to be sad on her birthday. Put me in the "feel bad for her daughter" camp.
I'm wondering if maybe the daughter who supposedly stops all the bullying is actually the bully herself and that's why she's being ostracized.
Then why do the kids want invited to the girls house? OP said the children ask to be invited.
Load More Replies...I'm calling BS on this. OP is giving off serious 'nice girl' vibes
So the parents don't mind that the kids are friends in school, but they don't want OP's kid over or have their kids with OP.... I wonder if OP herself may be the issue and the kids are too young to understand it. Is she one of those people who invite themselves over when their kids are there? Or does she never keep times on playdates? It seems weird that all the other parents would be this petty against one child. Sure it can happen, but OP seems a bit to amazing in her own story to be trustworthy
I think maybe the better way to "take the high road" would be to ask all the mothers if there was a reason for them not wanting to associate with OP's daughter or herself and if so discuss how the situation could be remedied.
nope! the op needs to grow up. I totally hear her saying my daughters perfect! the most popular ,sticks up for bullies ' and then about herself ' I dated a guy who "they" wanted but I got to date him - they don't stand a chance getting him" shes her biggest fan ! her daughter low key can't stand her. she's coming between parents and their kids because why? they don't like HER not her daughter - her daughter won't like her soon enough
Well I gotta say all the narrow minded people in here are the kids I wouldn’t want around my kids lol ok they are 23-20 my eldest the girl was bullied at school in her first yr in comp ( high school to USA ) I’m in uk I’m 60 n very much mamma bear ! U hurt my kids im combing for you end off ! So I did n put a stop to it quick sharp , from that day in my lass was the go to person if people needed help with bullies , n she gave em three choices one f**k off two deal with me three deal with my mother ! take a guess at their choice every time !!! same when my son started at her comp , lads started on him n where also promptly put back in their boxes ! I’m the cool mum you don’t f**k with lol I detest bullies been there I detest those as use their kids as weapons also been there as a stepmother to , I’m a lone mum now to 13 yrs n housebound n disabled but I still tolerate no s**t !! n I’m with op totally she’s a very fair lovely mum n while I’m not a people person I’d get in with her ! I’m
Also a white witch so am drawn to like minded people , being out in the sticks I don’t see anyone but my kids as live at home , cos they are happy here both have worked from age 16 , n a lot of their then school mates got pregnant left home early ie 18 , down to pushy parents strict parents , where as like op im a firm but fair n approachable mum , i also left home at 16 the streets where safer ! there is nothing off about op what so ever ! She’s just human n a very good mother , id never slate any parent down to their kids! but like op i,ll never cover for them either end off ! NTA OP n blessed be lovely x
Load More Replies...I think someone is a bad parent and the other parents don't trust their kids around them. A day drinker in the pick-up line. That or her precious little daughter is a spoiled brat who they don't want hanging around their kids. We all know a "precious little Suzy" whose mom knows can do no wrong but every other parent knows they bite.
If that were the case, wouldn't the married parents also know? It seems only single mothers are opposed to OP, not the married parents.
Load More Replies...Sadly these children are learning terrible life lessons from their parents and while OP is hopeful that in a few years her home will be the place, I think she is wrong. As puberty hits, these girls will be more like their mommas than OP counted on. Whatever sins these parents think OP/daughter have committed, so will their children.
OP is saying that her daughter isn't allowing bullying. I wonder if the reason the other girls are rushing to fawn over her is because she's bulldozing over social situations that as a child she might not necessarily be able to fully grasp. Yes, bullying is abhorrent and should be stomped out. However, sometimes bullying happens because kids aren't yet equipped to handle complex social situations. So a lot of feelings might be masked in that class that maybe they are willing to discuss at home. Or the mothers feel like OP's daughter is forcing the other girls into compliance with her own ideals of social cohesion. I do agree that the OP does come off as a slight bit pretentious though.
All are right. Our children are our future regardless! Every now and then (not physically) need a kick 🤷♂️
... I don't mind others standing with my Girl! That's fine! I know them all pretty well. ...
Load More Replies...How did you sneak some humble bragging in your comment? You sound like OP.
Load More Replies...Something is off about OP story and she’s kind of humble brag a few times in her message and responses to commenters. I personally it has nothing to do with the 8yo child, OP sounds like someone who called or think themselves “nice woman”. I feel bad for the children, they shouldn’t be exposed to this type of drama at that age, or any age really.
Something? She's gotta be the most annoying woman to roll thru here. "MY daughter is the popular kid! Everybody loves her! Everybody loves me too! I dated a cheating hunk, that's why these women are mean! They want my cheating hunk! Has absolutely nothing to do with me, I'm perfect! Not my problem if they can't see that." She seems like the type of person you get the urge to kick mid-sentence.
Load More Replies...The humble brag is not even subtle in this one and she circles back in the comments to how the single mothers fawn over the man she used to date but she doesn't think "they stand any chance". She sounds like a competitive red flag
Trying to see things from another perspective here. The mothers could indeed fawn over the guy. It happens. And being modest about things that happened don’t make anyone a better person. D**n, I even know some girls who are slightly competitive who are very caring and loyal.
Load More Replies...I hope this is made up; otherwise, if it's the OP's truth....OP is delusional and they don't trust their kids around the mother. The child is so popular that OP hints she stopped bullying in class. They know for a fact that children are throwing tantrums at home, in the homes of people who exclude you, and you're the reason. You live in an affluent area but an indoor playground is so fancy that you imply most can't afford to really go. You will see the children more than their parents in a few years once they can't be controlled...like wtf
This story is off. How is a quiet 8 year old who hates attention single-handedly stopping bullying in the class? Why hasnt OP said to the mothers, "Hey, my daughter wants to play with your daughter and you always say no. Can I ask why? Did something happen I should know about?" She obviously is able to message them
It sounds off, but I can answer one point. My little brother was a really chilled and easygoing character. Aged 7, he was in class. The teacher asked them all, "Who is your friend, who is always there for you, who will always help you when you need it?". It was a Catholic school, so the answer was "Jesus". The whole class of miniature beings turned as one to point to my brother and and answered "Benjamin!" (not his real name).
Load More Replies...Yes I agree. I'm technically on her side, but the identical unvarying repetitions of her virtuousness have raised my hackles, and also a sense that something is off.
Load More Replies...I think the other women shun OP's daughter because they dislike OP. Maybe they think of her as competition for male attention or maybe her ex (whom they know) has talked badly about her.
I found it more than a little offputting the number of times the OP brought up the ex thing.
Load More Replies...Talk about your creative writing exercises... this woman knows nothing about 8yos. And thinking that their mothers won't have a say in what they're doing in ~just 2 or 3 years~? Yeah right... she started out with an imaginary story about teenagers and then forgot to edit it when she decided that 8yo's would make a better sob story.
It seems really cruel to intentionally engineer a situation where your daughter's friends won't be there for her birthday. Even if she truly thinks that creating this conflict between the girls and their mothers is for the best for those kids in the long run... now your daughter gets to be sad on her birthday. Put me in the "feel bad for her daughter" camp.
I'm wondering if maybe the daughter who supposedly stops all the bullying is actually the bully herself and that's why she's being ostracized.
Then why do the kids want invited to the girls house? OP said the children ask to be invited.
Load More Replies...I'm calling BS on this. OP is giving off serious 'nice girl' vibes
So the parents don't mind that the kids are friends in school, but they don't want OP's kid over or have their kids with OP.... I wonder if OP herself may be the issue and the kids are too young to understand it. Is she one of those people who invite themselves over when their kids are there? Or does she never keep times on playdates? It seems weird that all the other parents would be this petty against one child. Sure it can happen, but OP seems a bit to amazing in her own story to be trustworthy
I think maybe the better way to "take the high road" would be to ask all the mothers if there was a reason for them not wanting to associate with OP's daughter or herself and if so discuss how the situation could be remedied.
nope! the op needs to grow up. I totally hear her saying my daughters perfect! the most popular ,sticks up for bullies ' and then about herself ' I dated a guy who "they" wanted but I got to date him - they don't stand a chance getting him" shes her biggest fan ! her daughter low key can't stand her. she's coming between parents and their kids because why? they don't like HER not her daughter - her daughter won't like her soon enough
Well I gotta say all the narrow minded people in here are the kids I wouldn’t want around my kids lol ok they are 23-20 my eldest the girl was bullied at school in her first yr in comp ( high school to USA ) I’m in uk I’m 60 n very much mamma bear ! U hurt my kids im combing for you end off ! So I did n put a stop to it quick sharp , from that day in my lass was the go to person if people needed help with bullies , n she gave em three choices one f**k off two deal with me three deal with my mother ! take a guess at their choice every time !!! same when my son started at her comp , lads started on him n where also promptly put back in their boxes ! I’m the cool mum you don’t f**k with lol I detest bullies been there I detest those as use their kids as weapons also been there as a stepmother to , I’m a lone mum now to 13 yrs n housebound n disabled but I still tolerate no s**t !! n I’m with op totally she’s a very fair lovely mum n while I’m not a people person I’d get in with her ! I’m
Also a white witch so am drawn to like minded people , being out in the sticks I don’t see anyone but my kids as live at home , cos they are happy here both have worked from age 16 , n a lot of their then school mates got pregnant left home early ie 18 , down to pushy parents strict parents , where as like op im a firm but fair n approachable mum , i also left home at 16 the streets where safer ! there is nothing off about op what so ever ! She’s just human n a very good mother , id never slate any parent down to their kids! but like op i,ll never cover for them either end off ! NTA OP n blessed be lovely x
Load More Replies...I think someone is a bad parent and the other parents don't trust their kids around them. A day drinker in the pick-up line. That or her precious little daughter is a spoiled brat who they don't want hanging around their kids. We all know a "precious little Suzy" whose mom knows can do no wrong but every other parent knows they bite.
If that were the case, wouldn't the married parents also know? It seems only single mothers are opposed to OP, not the married parents.
Load More Replies...Sadly these children are learning terrible life lessons from their parents and while OP is hopeful that in a few years her home will be the place, I think she is wrong. As puberty hits, these girls will be more like their mommas than OP counted on. Whatever sins these parents think OP/daughter have committed, so will their children.
OP is saying that her daughter isn't allowing bullying. I wonder if the reason the other girls are rushing to fawn over her is because she's bulldozing over social situations that as a child she might not necessarily be able to fully grasp. Yes, bullying is abhorrent and should be stomped out. However, sometimes bullying happens because kids aren't yet equipped to handle complex social situations. So a lot of feelings might be masked in that class that maybe they are willing to discuss at home. Or the mothers feel like OP's daughter is forcing the other girls into compliance with her own ideals of social cohesion. I do agree that the OP does come off as a slight bit pretentious though.
All are right. Our children are our future regardless! Every now and then (not physically) need a kick 🤷♂️
... I don't mind others standing with my Girl! That's fine! I know them all pretty well. ...
Load More Replies...How did you sneak some humble bragging in your comment? You sound like OP.
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