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122
“Would 1000000% Be The End For Me”: Guy Flies Home Without GF, Makes Her Doubt Their Relationship
Interview With Expert
Traveling with your significant other can be an amazing bonding experience. The two of you get to explore new places, enjoy a relaxed week off without any work or obligations and create memories that you’ll cherish for the rest of your lives.
But traveling can also be quite stressful, especially if you’re running to catch a train or arguing about whose fault it was that you missed your flight. One woman recently posted on Reddit seeking advice after her boyfriend abandoned her at the airport and flew home alone. Below, you’ll find the full story, as well as a conversation with Nia Williams, Relationship Therapist and Life Coach from Miss Date Doctor.
RELATED:
This woman was furious when she realized that her boyfriend abandoned her at the airport and flew home alone
Image credits: Iakobchuk (not the actual photo)
She even shared the conversation they had over text right after the gate closed
Image credits: Exotic_Platypus_4926
Image credits: astakhovyaroslav (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Exotic_Platypus_4926
“Travel often involves unexpected situations that can test a couple’s ability to adapt and work as a team”
One of the worst aspects of going on vacation is what you have to go through to actually make it to your destination. If you’re on a road trip, sitting in the car for 8 hours at a time might feel like a drag. And if you’re flying, there’s a good chance you’ll have to wake up extremely early, sit in the airport for hours and arrive at your hotel groggy, cranky and uninterested in sightseeing.
Unfortunately, the airport is also the place where travel plans often go awry. According to USA Today, between 2% and 8% of passengers miss their flights every single day.
Travel Pocket Guide notes that this can happy for many reasons, including issues with transportation or getting stuck in traffic, underestimating how long it takes to get to the airport, failing to check update flight information, miscommunications between airline staff and passengers, oversleeping and getting stuck at security.
In this story, however, the woman blamed her boyfriend for making them late to the airport. To find out why traveling with a significant other is so stressful, we reached out to Relationship Therapist and Life Coach from Miss Date Doctor, Nia Williams. She was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and shine some light on this situation.
“Fatigue from long travel days, navigation challenges, and unfamiliar environments can lead to decreased patience and increased irritability,” Nia says. “The disruption of normal routines and the need to make constant decisions together can also strain communication and problem-solving abilities. Additionally, travel often involves unexpected situations that can test a couple’s ability to adapt and work as a team.”
Image credits: s_kawee (not the actual photo)
“How partners treat each other during challenging times often reveals the true nature of their relationship”
We also asked the relationship expert what kind of message this man conveyed to his partner by flying home alone.
“By boarding the flight without his girlfriend, this man sent a clear message that his own needs and desires took precedence over their relationship and her well-being,” Nia noted. “This action demonstrates a lack of empathy, consideration, and basic care for his partner. It’s particularly painful because it leaves her feeling abandoned, unimportant, and potentially unsafe in a vulnerable situation.”
So how can he make it up to his girlfriend? To apologize effectively, Nia says the man should “admit to what he did wrong specifically; acknowledge the hurt and impact his actions caused; express genuine remorse, not just saying ‘I apologize’ but ‘I’m so sorry for…; empathize with his girlfriend’s feelings and demonstrate understanding of how his actions affected her; and offer to make amends and ask what he can do to rebuild trust.”
The relationship expert says that making up for this severe breach of trust will take time and consistent effort. “He should be prepared to listen to her feelings without becoming defensive, give her space if needed, and demonstrate through his actions that he prioritizes her and the relationship moving forward,” Nia shared.
Finally, she noted that this situation highlights the importance of effective communication, mutual respect, and prioritizing your partner’s well-being in a relationship. “Couples planning to travel together should discuss expectations and strategies for handling stress beforehand,” Nia suggests. “It’s also crucial to remember that how partners treat each other during challenging times often reveals the true nature of their relationship.”
We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. How would you have responded if you were in this woman’s shoes? Then, you can find another Bored Panda article discussing similar relationship issues right here.
Image credits: Stas Knop (not the actual photo)
Later, the woman responded to several comments and provided more information about her situation
Many readers assured the woman that she was not overreacting and called out her boyfriend for leaving her all alone
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What do you think ?
R Dennis 9 months ago (edited)
I have parked at a hotel and taken the shuttle because it's cheaper, BUT... there is no way we are arriving by the skin of our teeth. I have had stuff happen that screwed us by an hour and we still made our flight. I would rather sit at the airport for two hours than stress about missing a flight. All that unnecessary filler to say: I would have been waiting on the other side of security. We both make it, or we both don't make it.
Royal Stray 9 months ago
Right, you always make sure to be at the airport at least 3h before your flight. You have no idea how long the ques will be or if your cab or whatever on the way will hit every red light in the city. The cheaper option would have been fine had they just booked it earlier. I wonder if this is their first time flying or something. I mean the BF is selfish either way, and OP should rethink the relationship, but how are both of them this bad at time management
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Boo 9 months ago
Not only is the boyfriend an àrse, but he's also a cheap àrse! Pay for the damn taxi to the airport!! Check in times are not optional.....it usually states to be 2-3 hours early for your flight so this doesn't happen! I would leave him so quick, especially if he didn't say anything when she landed. He's the one to cause her to miss the flight and was only looking out for himself! I mean, how selfish can you get?
ThisIsMe 9 months ago
Heck, I've treated co-workers better than that! Ran to gate and physically stood in the doorway telling the agents that they were minutes away. To be fair, my co-workers told me I could leave without them if necessary. But I kept that agent talking until they got there and we were the last 3 people on board. It just isn't that hard. Dump the guy.
Sarah Kathrin Matsoukis 9 months ago
So he saved 30 bucks but she had to book another flight, I'd take that money from him before I dump him
roddy 9 months ago
I can't imagine not allowing plenty of time to get to the airport. I am always anxious about something delaying me and would much rather kill time at the airport than stress about making it on time. Some people like to gamble. Avoid them. Anybody who would risk losing a flight over $30 is an idiot.
Apatheist Account2 9 months ago
Why were they in separate lines? That doesn't make sense. Why would one not stand next to one's partner? Anyway, this is why they say to check in an hour before - so add another hour and you'll have a margin of error. The only time I've ever had to run for a flight was when a sudden strike was announced and I was told at the check in to run to catch the earlier flight, since there was likely to be several hours of delay. Fortunately only hand baggage, and made it :)
KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
I'm spending a night in Gatwick airport in a couple of weeks because Sunday transport options suck and there are no hotels that will let me check out at 3am for under £50... I am that person who is generally in the airport about 2.5 hours before departure because of margins for error. And yes - why the separate lines?
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AMaureen Dance 9 months ago
So, he ubered to a hotel that you weren't even registered at, to take a shuttle, which I can only assume you weren't entitled to take so he could save a few bucks? Then left you alone waiting 7 hours to pay for another flight, rather than waiting for you? Where else has he been cheaping out on you?
JayWantsACat 9 months ago
I could MAYBE forgive my s/o getting on the plane thinking I could make it but picking me up the next day without saying a word would be the deal breaker. If I were him, I'd have breakfast and coffee and a promise about how I'd make it up to her. Not even bringing it up is crazy.
Earonn - 9 months ago
Wait, he wrote that "the person" (I guess a flight attendant) told him to board and that OP could make it? I mean, I would trust their experience, too. Did I miss anything?
DC and S 9 months ago (edited)
I don't think I would be mad he got on the plane, I would have believed them too so it makes logical sense to me; I would think she would make it on since they said so. But, I would be nuclear about getting to the airport so late. THAT is grounds for dumping him; I don't need that kind of stress in my life.
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Petra Peitsch 9 months ago
I'm wondering, how many red flags OP needs, before she dumps this selfish a.sshole. Oh, but before she must get her money back in a way from him.
Schnitzel 9 months ago (edited)
I would have waited for my partner. Either we're both on the ride or not at all. But then again, I'm abnormally flexible so I can change things in a second and not bat an eyelash. Thanks, parents, for an extremely unstable childhood where the only constant was a change in the schedule; all depending on my dad's "mood"..
Ben Aziza 9 months ago
Well he left her at the airports. She would do best to "stay left" As far away from this fkin loser... Looks like we know who is tripping their partner in the zombie movie!
Ruth Watry 9 months ago
When he realized that the shuttle was not leaving for 40 minutes, he should have gotten another Uber or a Lyft
JB 9 months ago
Um, because they were travelling together as a couple? Was she supposed to leave him to his travel arrangements to make sure *she* made it in time to get on the flight?
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Hidalgo 9 months ago
OP’s boyfriend was rude and she should rethink the relationship. However, this isn’t 1825 or even 1975. Women can schedule rides themselves and can be responsible for their own transport. Step up.
Michael MacKinnon 9 months ago
So, you're saying she should have ditched him when he came up with the Rube Goldberg plan for using a hotel shuttle, and taken a Lyft / Uber / taxi herself? And you think that would have made sense? It is his fault they were late to the airport, his fault for not being with her through security, and his fault for not waiting at the gate.
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Romy Rösli 9 months ago
When my bf and I use different security lines we wait for each other at the end of the line. We don’t go to the gate separately. I once traveled back from a wedding with a guy I had never met before that wedding and while going through security check he was taken to the side for a more thorough check. I waited for him although we were already close to the time the gate would close. I couldn’t make myself leave my companion behind although we were not close at all.
Bookworm 9 months ago (edited)
OP is at fault because she's acting like she has no agency and just had to go along with what her bf decided. She was free to take a cab by herself directly to the airport. She was free to split the cost of a taxi with bf. Instead she's acting like a victim when this is her fault for going along with what her bf wanted. I do think he's selfish, cheap, and a s****y planner, but ultimately OP was responsible for being on time. She wasn't because she decided to go along with bf plans instead of making her own and getting there at least an hour ahead of time. That time is to specifically deal with situations like this (long security lines).
The Starsong Princess 9 months ago
He did what was convenient for him. OP, on the other hand, is very passive. She didn’t get herself to the airport on time to meet her flight. There was nothing stopping her from getting a Lyft to the airport herself and spending the $30 or even starting out earlier with the shuttle. You have to leave yourself more time. This is a cascade of bad decisions. The bf promised to make it up to her - so what’s he going to do?
Papa 9 months ago
I gave you an up vote to get you back to zero. I will agree that the boyfriend is a jerk, but he's not completely to blame for the situation. She's an adult, but she isn't acting like one.
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Crystalwitch60 9 months ago
that’s one uncaring pos right there n he told you what to basically RUN ! Listen to him n do so in the op direction FAST !!!!! no one does that to anyone they travel with let alone your partner no way no how all to save a few bucks as USA calls em skinflit as well as a complete d**k run lovely run blessed be x
Two_rolling_black_eyes 9 months ago
Why were they in separate security lines? You and the SO hand the TSA your stuff together, go through the same Xray, and put your shoes back on afterwards sitting next to one another.
Mr. Jones 9 months ago
One probably had a TKN number and the other didn't.
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Inservio Smurf 9 months ago
This just isn't true. If you're on the manifest, you are getting on that plane. They react veeeeeeery suspiciously to people abruptly changing their mind about catching a flight when their luggage is already on board.
JB 9 months ago
LOL. There’s this thing called carry-on luggage, which doesn’t need to be checked in.
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Kohl_Keene 9 months ago
When someone shows you who they are, believe it the first time. Signed someone who’s been there, done that and it didn’t get better.
Janelle Collard 9 months ago (edited)
So, OP missed her flight for $30 her cheap-a** BF didn't want to pay? Boy - BYE! If she doesn't break up with him, don't expect better behavior in the future.
Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo 9 months ago
Bf was 100% a d**k for not waiting for her, especially when it was his idea to take the shuttle. But the reddit comments about him not caring about her safety are a little weird; she was left in Seattle, not at the Fall of Saigon. Its not that she needed an escort, its just a d**k move to ditch your person. It would have been a d**k move if she did it to him
Lyone Fein 9 months ago
Spending late night hours alone in an airport, having to tend to one's luggage items, while trying to find food or to rest for several hours or go to and from the bathrooms and your new gate.......all of this makes a lone woman a target for various unsavory types. Having traveled alone myself many times I can attest to this. At the very least, numerous men will think it is perfectly OK to invade the personal space of a single female traveler and start unwanted flirtations while asking all sorts of personal questions. It is nerve wracking, frustrating, and infuriating.
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Kate Johnson 7 months ago
He didn't wait for her because he doesn't care about her, it's really that simple. There's no excuse for this nonsense. I'd for sure be done with him.
Courtney Christelle 9 months ago
I would’ve waited at the gate for my boyfriend, not on the plane. If they need to close the doors then close the doors but I’ll be getting left behind too.
Tom De Paul 9 months ago
He didn't care for her safety? She's an adult in an American airport during the day. Where's the danger? Do adult women need some special protection now that I have never heard about?
KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
One of the most disturbing books I ever read... (we need to talk about Kevin).
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Schmebulock 9 months ago
What he did was bad, but if she is debating dumping him over this one instance then it was not meant to be.
Tyke 9 months ago
Not enough information here - did she research travel to the airport at all? Does she have an opinion in this relationship? If not, that's more of a red flag. Why is it all on the BF? Was there a fee for changing flights if you miss one? Why did they not go through security together? Who told him to board without her? Definite AH is the person who claims she wasn't safe in the airport... women travel solo all the time, and since when were airports so dangerous?
David Clifford 9 months ago
He saved himself 30?...you mean saved you both 30. You weren't stranded...you had a way home. And why did you go into a different line?
Mr. Jones 9 months ago
She's overreacting. So what? You sit in an airport by yourself, big deal. I used to travel for work all over the country. He still picked you up the next day. If she was so worried about him being cheap, she should have paid for the shuttle to their airport. This is so friggin trivial and not even worth a post. Years ago, my husband and I were flying home from Arizona to Maine. I had a big globe candle in my backpack that concerned airport security. Before they took my phone, I called my husband and said, "They're freaking out over the candle, I have no idea why it's taking them so long to realize it's a candle, but if our flight boards before I get there. just get on the flight and go home and I'll sort this out. No need for both of us to be stuck in Phoenix any longer than we have to be." He did end up flying home without me. No big deal. Grow the f**k up. If you can't be alone in an airport for 6 hours, you have much bigger issues.
R Dennis 9 months ago (edited)
I have parked at a hotel and taken the shuttle because it's cheaper, BUT... there is no way we are arriving by the skin of our teeth. I have had stuff happen that screwed us by an hour and we still made our flight. I would rather sit at the airport for two hours than stress about missing a flight. All that unnecessary filler to say: I would have been waiting on the other side of security. We both make it, or we both don't make it.
Royal Stray 9 months ago
Right, you always make sure to be at the airport at least 3h before your flight. You have no idea how long the ques will be or if your cab or whatever on the way will hit every red light in the city. The cheaper option would have been fine had they just booked it earlier. I wonder if this is their first time flying or something. I mean the BF is selfish either way, and OP should rethink the relationship, but how are both of them this bad at time management
Load More Replies... Boo 9 months ago
Not only is the boyfriend an àrse, but he's also a cheap àrse! Pay for the damn taxi to the airport!! Check in times are not optional.....it usually states to be 2-3 hours early for your flight so this doesn't happen! I would leave him so quick, especially if he didn't say anything when she landed. He's the one to cause her to miss the flight and was only looking out for himself! I mean, how selfish can you get?
ThisIsMe 9 months ago
Heck, I've treated co-workers better than that! Ran to gate and physically stood in the doorway telling the agents that they were minutes away. To be fair, my co-workers told me I could leave without them if necessary. But I kept that agent talking until they got there and we were the last 3 people on board. It just isn't that hard. Dump the guy.
Sarah Kathrin Matsoukis 9 months ago
So he saved 30 bucks but she had to book another flight, I'd take that money from him before I dump him
roddy 9 months ago
I can't imagine not allowing plenty of time to get to the airport. I am always anxious about something delaying me and would much rather kill time at the airport than stress about making it on time. Some people like to gamble. Avoid them. Anybody who would risk losing a flight over $30 is an idiot.
Apatheist Account2 9 months ago
Why were they in separate lines? That doesn't make sense. Why would one not stand next to one's partner? Anyway, this is why they say to check in an hour before - so add another hour and you'll have a margin of error. The only time I've ever had to run for a flight was when a sudden strike was announced and I was told at the check in to run to catch the earlier flight, since there was likely to be several hours of delay. Fortunately only hand baggage, and made it :)
KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
I'm spending a night in Gatwick airport in a couple of weeks because Sunday transport options suck and there are no hotels that will let me check out at 3am for under £50... I am that person who is generally in the airport about 2.5 hours before departure because of margins for error. And yes - why the separate lines?
Load More Replies... AMaureen Dance 9 months ago
So, he ubered to a hotel that you weren't even registered at, to take a shuttle, which I can only assume you weren't entitled to take so he could save a few bucks? Then left you alone waiting 7 hours to pay for another flight, rather than waiting for you? Where else has he been cheaping out on you?
JayWantsACat 9 months ago
I could MAYBE forgive my s/o getting on the plane thinking I could make it but picking me up the next day without saying a word would be the deal breaker. If I were him, I'd have breakfast and coffee and a promise about how I'd make it up to her. Not even bringing it up is crazy.
Earonn - 9 months ago
Wait, he wrote that "the person" (I guess a flight attendant) told him to board and that OP could make it? I mean, I would trust their experience, too. Did I miss anything?
DC and S 9 months ago (edited)
I don't think I would be mad he got on the plane, I would have believed them too so it makes logical sense to me; I would think she would make it on since they said so. But, I would be nuclear about getting to the airport so late. THAT is grounds for dumping him; I don't need that kind of stress in my life.
Load More Replies... Petra Peitsch 9 months ago
I'm wondering, how many red flags OP needs, before she dumps this selfish a.sshole. Oh, but before she must get her money back in a way from him.
Schnitzel 9 months ago (edited)
I would have waited for my partner. Either we're both on the ride or not at all. But then again, I'm abnormally flexible so I can change things in a second and not bat an eyelash. Thanks, parents, for an extremely unstable childhood where the only constant was a change in the schedule; all depending on my dad's "mood"..
Ben Aziza 9 months ago
Well he left her at the airports. She would do best to "stay left" As far away from this fkin loser... Looks like we know who is tripping their partner in the zombie movie!
Ruth Watry 9 months ago
When he realized that the shuttle was not leaving for 40 minutes, he should have gotten another Uber or a Lyft
JB 9 months ago
Um, because they were travelling together as a couple? Was she supposed to leave him to his travel arrangements to make sure *she* made it in time to get on the flight?
Load More Replies... Hidalgo 9 months ago
OP’s boyfriend was rude and she should rethink the relationship. However, this isn’t 1825 or even 1975. Women can schedule rides themselves and can be responsible for their own transport. Step up.
Michael MacKinnon 9 months ago
So, you're saying she should have ditched him when he came up with the Rube Goldberg plan for using a hotel shuttle, and taken a Lyft / Uber / taxi herself? And you think that would have made sense? It is his fault they were late to the airport, his fault for not being with her through security, and his fault for not waiting at the gate.
Load More Replies... Romy Rösli 9 months ago
When my bf and I use different security lines we wait for each other at the end of the line. We don’t go to the gate separately. I once traveled back from a wedding with a guy I had never met before that wedding and while going through security check he was taken to the side for a more thorough check. I waited for him although we were already close to the time the gate would close. I couldn’t make myself leave my companion behind although we were not close at all.
Bookworm 9 months ago (edited)
OP is at fault because she's acting like she has no agency and just had to go along with what her bf decided. She was free to take a cab by herself directly to the airport. She was free to split the cost of a taxi with bf. Instead she's acting like a victim when this is her fault for going along with what her bf wanted. I do think he's selfish, cheap, and a s****y planner, but ultimately OP was responsible for being on time. She wasn't because she decided to go along with bf plans instead of making her own and getting there at least an hour ahead of time. That time is to specifically deal with situations like this (long security lines).
The Starsong Princess 9 months ago
He did what was convenient for him. OP, on the other hand, is very passive. She didn’t get herself to the airport on time to meet her flight. There was nothing stopping her from getting a Lyft to the airport herself and spending the $30 or even starting out earlier with the shuttle. You have to leave yourself more time. This is a cascade of bad decisions. The bf promised to make it up to her - so what’s he going to do?
Papa 9 months ago
I gave you an up vote to get you back to zero. I will agree that the boyfriend is a jerk, but he's not completely to blame for the situation. She's an adult, but she isn't acting like one.
Load More Replies... Crystalwitch60 9 months ago
that’s one uncaring pos right there n he told you what to basically RUN ! Listen to him n do so in the op direction FAST !!!!! no one does that to anyone they travel with let alone your partner no way no how all to save a few bucks as USA calls em skinflit as well as a complete d**k run lovely run blessed be x
Two_rolling_black_eyes 9 months ago
Why were they in separate security lines? You and the SO hand the TSA your stuff together, go through the same Xray, and put your shoes back on afterwards sitting next to one another.
Mr. Jones 9 months ago
One probably had a TKN number and the other didn't.
Load More Replies... Inservio Smurf 9 months ago
This just isn't true. If you're on the manifest, you are getting on that plane. They react veeeeeeery suspiciously to people abruptly changing their mind about catching a flight when their luggage is already on board.
JB 9 months ago
LOL. There’s this thing called carry-on luggage, which doesn’t need to be checked in.
Load More Replies... Kohl_Keene 9 months ago
When someone shows you who they are, believe it the first time. Signed someone who’s been there, done that and it didn’t get better.
Janelle Collard 9 months ago (edited)
So, OP missed her flight for $30 her cheap-a** BF didn't want to pay? Boy - BYE! If she doesn't break up with him, don't expect better behavior in the future.
Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo 9 months ago
Bf was 100% a d**k for not waiting for her, especially when it was his idea to take the shuttle. But the reddit comments about him not caring about her safety are a little weird; she was left in Seattle, not at the Fall of Saigon. Its not that she needed an escort, its just a d**k move to ditch your person. It would have been a d**k move if she did it to him
Lyone Fein 9 months ago
Spending late night hours alone in an airport, having to tend to one's luggage items, while trying to find food or to rest for several hours or go to and from the bathrooms and your new gate.......all of this makes a lone woman a target for various unsavory types. Having traveled alone myself many times I can attest to this. At the very least, numerous men will think it is perfectly OK to invade the personal space of a single female traveler and start unwanted flirtations while asking all sorts of personal questions. It is nerve wracking, frustrating, and infuriating.
Load More Replies... Kate Johnson 7 months ago
He didn't wait for her because he doesn't care about her, it's really that simple. There's no excuse for this nonsense. I'd for sure be done with him.
Courtney Christelle 9 months ago
I would’ve waited at the gate for my boyfriend, not on the plane. If they need to close the doors then close the doors but I’ll be getting left behind too.
Tom De Paul 9 months ago
He didn't care for her safety? She's an adult in an American airport during the day. Where's the danger? Do adult women need some special protection now that I have never heard about?
KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
One of the most disturbing books I ever read... (we need to talk about Kevin).
Load More Replies... Schmebulock 9 months ago
What he did was bad, but if she is debating dumping him over this one instance then it was not meant to be.
Tyke 9 months ago
Not enough information here - did she research travel to the airport at all? Does she have an opinion in this relationship? If not, that's more of a red flag. Why is it all on the BF? Was there a fee for changing flights if you miss one? Why did they not go through security together? Who told him to board without her? Definite AH is the person who claims she wasn't safe in the airport... women travel solo all the time, and since when were airports so dangerous?
David Clifford 9 months ago
He saved himself 30?...you mean saved you both 30. You weren't stranded...you had a way home. And why did you go into a different line?
Mr. Jones 9 months ago
She's overreacting. So what? You sit in an airport by yourself, big deal. I used to travel for work all over the country. He still picked you up the next day. If she was so worried about him being cheap, she should have paid for the shuttle to their airport. This is so friggin trivial and not even worth a post. Years ago, my husband and I were flying home from Arizona to Maine. I had a big globe candle in my backpack that concerned airport security. Before they took my phone, I called my husband and said, "They're freaking out over the candle, I have no idea why it's taking them so long to realize it's a candle, but if our flight boards before I get there. just get on the flight and go home and I'll sort this out. No need for both of us to be stuck in Phoenix any longer than we have to be." He did end up flying home without me. No big deal. Grow the f**k up. If you can't be alone in an airport for 6 hours, you have much bigger issues.
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