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Woman Uninvites Bro And SIL To Family Gathering After Being Wrongly Blamed And Badmouthed By Them
When the documentary series “The Last Dance,” dedicated to Michael Jordan, was released in 2020, the global treasure trove of memes associated with the basketball legend was enriched with the phrase: “and I took it personally.” For Jordan, this attitude actually helped him achieve absolute world domination, but what about others, mere mortals?
I can tell you for sure that the user u/Wise_Kangaroo_8019, the narrator of our story today, also took her sister-in-law’s unfair accusations and insults personally. So much so that even their subsequent apologies didn’t change the bitterness of such mistreatment. And the reason for this was just two plates of leftover food…
More info: Reddit
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When someone says something like “…and I took it personally,” sometimes it’s not about Michael Jordan—it’s about a true family drama, like in this story
Image credits: syda_productions / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author of the post is 21 years old, and last year she got wrongly blasted by her brother’s wife, which ruined their relationship completely
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
After one family gathering, the author gave the bro 3 plates of leftover food, but he told his wife at home that she allegedly refused to give anything
Image credits: simonapilolla / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The wife saw red and started actively and harshly badmouthing the author in front of their numerous kinfolk and friends
Image credits: Wise_Kangaroo_8019
The bro later admitted to gobbling up the food himself and framing his sibling, and they offered their apologies, but the author refused to invite them to another party anyway
The original poster (OP) has been on bad terms with her sister-in-law since last year. No, that’s not even true—the author has no relationship with her at all, and the reason for this was two plates of leftover food. After one family gathering, when the OP packed and handed three plates of food to her older brother, the next day, his wife found only one at home.
The husband told his spouse that the original poster had allegedly refused to hand them the other leftovers, and this so enraged the lady that she began heavily bad-mouthing the OP in front of the entire family, ridiculing her body, eating habits, and everything related. Meanwhile, the original poster had no idea why she was being subjected to such a barrage of insults.
Ultimately, after a lengthy “investigation,” it turned out that the brother had just framed the OP. He gobbled up those two plates himself and then found nothing better to do than blame the younger sibling. Over time, both the brother and his wife apologized to the author quite sincerely, but the original poster remained bitterly resentful of everything she had said in anger.
So now, when the OP was about to host another family gathering, she claimed she still held a grudge against the brother and his spouse and didn’t want them in her home. The relatives certainly felt livid about this decision, but neither their anger nor the persuasions of the rest of the family could influence the author’s decision. So she just decided to seek some online support as well.
Image credits: jet-po / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Well, experts say that sometimes, when faced with extreme toxicity or serious resentment from relatives, people do choose to go low contact or even no contact with them. For example, this article, published on Psychology Today, strongly recommends focusing on yourself, prioritizing your own well-being over others’ opinions about you.
As for the behavior of the author’s brother and his wife, it was definitely immature on their part. Robert Taibbi, L.C.S.W., notes that emotionally mature individuals should always take responsibility for their own actions and decisions before blaming others. In other words, that’s exactly what happened here.
In fact, you don’t have to swallow your pride just to maintain a relationship with any of your toxic relatives. “People are invited to these gatherings because they’re family, not because they’re charming. But though boundaries are elastic, they’re not infinitely so, and conduct can override kinship,” this dedicated post in the New York Times reasonably claims.
People in the comments on the original post also mostly sided with the author, arguing that it wasn’t enough for the brother and his wife to apologize in person. They should’ve apologized in the presence of all the people to whom they lied about the OP. In any case, the author is the host of the gathering, so she sets the rules—all the responders are quite sure. So do you also agree with this point?
Most commenters supported the author and her decision, claiming that the relatives actually had to apologize in public, not only in person
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What do you think ?
Sally Moen 4 days ago
I apologized, just now! Why are you still feeling hurt? Because, honey, the world doesn't revolve around you. The other people in the world get to have feelings, and if you hurt them by your actions, you apologize and then hope they will still talk to you. It's not up to you and that's ok. That might be just what you need to not be so reactive.
Kate Johnson 5 days ago
An apology doesn't "fix" anything. It doesn't "heal" anything. I can be a place for rebuilding, depending on the offense, but when someone says terrible nasty things to you, just because they apologize later, doesn't erase that memory or change what was heard. It doesn't mean you want to continue in relationship with them. I'd tell anyone who had a problem with my guest list, that they were under no obligation to attend my event.
Sally Moen 4 days ago
I apologized, just now! Why are you still feeling hurt? Because, honey, the world doesn't revolve around you. The other people in the world get to have feelings, and if you hurt them by your actions, you apologize and then hope they will still talk to you. It's not up to you and that's ok. That might be just what you need to not be so reactive.
Kate Johnson 5 days ago
An apology doesn't "fix" anything. It doesn't "heal" anything. I can be a place for rebuilding, depending on the offense, but when someone says terrible nasty things to you, just because they apologize later, doesn't erase that memory or change what was heard. It doesn't mean you want to continue in relationship with them. I'd tell anyone who had a problem with my guest list, that they were under no obligation to attend my event.
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