A good meme is bound to chase away the blues and pick up your mood somewhat. A great clean meme, on the other hand, is something you can’t help but share and help go even more viral than it already is.
That’s where the ‘Very Clean Funny Pics’ Facebook page comes in. A popular social media project, it does exactly what it says on the tin and shares family-friendly, wholesome, and clean memes that are actually funny. And we’d be lying if we said that we didn’t relate to a lot of them. We’ve collected the top pics to share with you, Pandas. So go on, take a break, scroll down, and forward the memes you loved the most to your friends. They might need a giggle or two in their lives.
This post may include affiliate links.
The very definition of chaotic good, yes. Just delightful and silly.
Load More Replies...Right?? We have WAY too much evil, I love this good! I also love that it is REAL! I found a pic online of their cake day lol!! cake-64d2b...0-jpeg.jpg
I mean, there are tons of holidays for some deity doing this or that sort of stuff. Cake day at least makes sense!
Well they could dedicate it to Fornax, the roman deity of the oven and baking
Load More Replies...This has made my day! Sometimes the simplest things can be so special.
I once made up a completely imaginary manager at work..complete with time card and paid off the uniform guy to make one for 'the new guy'. I would put up fake announcements from him on the bulletin board. I would tell people that I just met him or saw him and some actually said that they did too. This went on for 4 months . Never knew it was me.
Why Are Clean Memes So Popular?
Bored Panda wanted to learn more about funny clean memes, so we reached out to comedy writer and published author Ariane Sherine. She was kind enough to share her thoughts on making memes appealing, shed some light on why we love sharing memes so much, and explained what to do if digital creators feel like they're too focused on engagement rather than the actual content.
"Jokes that are universal and aren’t specific to one age group, gender, sexuality or race are likely to work best," Sherine shared her insights on how to appeal to the widest possible audience.
"Then again, you might want to attract a particular demographic and think it’s plenty large enough for your purposes. But for maximum viral potential, ensure the largest possible cross-section of the population will understand your meme—and that usually means making it family-friendly too," she explained.
This person memento'd themself in the funniest way possible. Legend!
My Mum worked in a hospital, she tells the story of a woman that came in for surgery who had dyed her pubic hair green and had a tattoo stating "Keep off the grass", they had to work in that area so, on her sign out sheet, they wrote "Sorry we had to mow the lawn" :D
Before I had my leg amputated, I wrote, '🎶 Please don't talk about me when I'm gone' 🎶 on it.
So why are you talking about it (it’s a joke dont downvote me I’m trying to be funny)
Load More Replies...I just had surgery on my right foot last week and I wrote on my left foot "not this one" The nurses and surgeon all got a good chuckle out of it. They said they appreciated my assistance and attitude, since I would be out during the surgery. I told them "I was happy to help and glad I could make them laugh" 😁😂
I drew a treasure map on my knee when I had it replaced with x marks the spot. I wrote and ode to the surgeon on my shoulder for another surgery. I've done this sort of things several times. Sadly I've never had a doc or nurse comment in it afterward!! PS I HAVE PICS!!
Give us le pics. I wabt to unbury tye treasure
Load More Replies...Similarish story: my mom was diagnosed with rheumatic heart disease when I was a kid which required a monthly shot (in the bum cheek) to keep her immune system strong until the doctors could operate. So every month, we'd draw something funny on my mom's bum cheek (like a bullseye or we used glittery fake tattoos one time) to give the nurses a giggle.
I've seen this pic make the internet rounds a few times. I hope Grandma is still alive and well!
What a treasure. She reminds me of a poem by Jenny Joseph. It starts “When I Grow Old, I Shall Wear Purple”
I've loved that poem forever!! (I'm also a pond lady, Pond Lady!)
Load More Replies...Meanwhile, we were curious to get the comedy writer's take as to why so many of us get the urge to share these funny clean memes with our friends and social circle.
"Memes usually make us laugh and give us a ‘wow’ moment of universal human truth. This makes us feel good—so naturally, we want to share the memes with our friends so they can experience the same feelings," Sherine told Bored Panda.
Some digital creators might become far too focused on the (lack of) engagement their content gets rather than the content of these very clean, funny pics themselves. We were interested to get the comedy writer's thoughts on this.
"I think when you’re getting downhearted from a lack of views, comments, likes, shares and general virality, it’s time to refocus on the joy of creating content and remember why you decided to make it in the first place," the writer said.
"Sure, it’s great if other people like it too—but that should be a happy byproduct and not the end goal," Sherine stressed the fact that passion is a key factor here.
I tried to convince the St. Paul Children's Museum to open late for grown ups only so we could play and not be in the way of the kids.
There is a toy store near me who does that kind of things - spend the night in a toy store playing, with some friends and a case of beer. The events are always sold out...
Load More Replies...Actually, there is an Open Museum Night once a year where I live. And free public transportation that comes with the ticket. All museums and even our famous sportstadium and the botanic garden are participating. Bands playing music and food stands, different booths all over the City. So much fun! It‘s Even accepted to bring your own bottle of alcoholic beverage 👍🏻😉
Yup, as a fellow European just wanted to write about this, but you got there ahead of me. have an updoot instead!
Load More Replies...The zoo and the science center here do 21+ happy hours with special presentations and adult beverages after closing a few times a year. It is always a hit
It's been a while since I looked into it, but the SF bay area has several museums which (used to?) have special nights for adults only evening admission and play music, dim lights, serve drinks, etc. My wife and i had our engagement party at The Tech. It was super fun!
I’ve been there too on vacation with my cousin! We timed it to be able to arrive right for the event and it was really fun! Definitely recommend!
Load More Replies...Oregon Museum of Science and Industry (OMSI) has a monthly event called OMSI After Dark. The whole evening is 21 and over and they serve beer and wine. It's great for those of us who don't like children.
A local science museum does sleepovers called night at the museum. It's expensive and not as much fun as I expected, but the kids like it. I did it once with my kids.
I'm sorry that I have to be that person, but- there are actually four.
I think all you need is a ref shirt, some bread, and a whistle. Happy pranking, my friend
Load More Replies...Every evening after snuggles I give my rats a dish of baby food. One, who does not participate in snuggles because she's antisocial, eventually decided that if she just went and sat next to the empty dish the goodies would appear. If that doesn't happen speedily enough she gives me a whole collection of really dirty looks. You'd be amazed how good rats are at giving you the side-eye.
Snuggling with adorable rats... I'd love that! Always liked mice in general
Load More Replies...On the way to the stables, in the morning at sunrise, I first feed the wild birds, then the horses. Oh boy when I am late or change the sequence ... two customer-groups complaining
One starling has started to imitate the sound of water dripping from the gutter onto the slate covering to grate. Now I can’t tell if it is actually raining or if that blasted bird is having me on.
Cowbirds naturally kinda sound like water drips.
Load More Replies...Can you get recorded whistling in a tune songbirds can copy? I can't whistle for toffee, but it would be great if the birds could let me know when I need to hustle and get the feeders filled.
Buy like ref whistle they can come pretty cheap and you can put it on a lanyard. Can be used in emergencies too
Load More Replies...Some alternative names include: Hen Solo, Anakhen Skywalker, Casshen Andor, Hendo Ohnaka, Obi Wan Henobi, Asajj Hentress, and Mace Hendu
A duck laid eggs at my work so I named them Gladys Flight and the Chicks
Unlike this person, last time there was an unexpected animal on my driveway, it WAS a giant lizard. A monitor lizard not a komodo dragon, but there's a lot of resemblance. I still have no idea how it got there. The damn thing was at least two meters long.
Meet the Very Clean Funny Pics Facebook Page
The ‘Very Clean Funny Pics’ page has a following of 277k Facebook users on the social media platform. The page itself has been up and running for over a decade, having been founded all the way back in 2012. The team behind the project has consistently shared relatable, clean memes that are actually funny. And that’s the secret behind the page’s continued success throughout the years.
The entire purpose of the page is to post very clean funny pics. All that the moderators ask from the followers is to keep the comments as clean as the memes themselves.
I'm 62 and my hubs is 74. The day we QUIT bowing our straw papers at each other in restaurants will be the day that one of us dies. What's the point in living if you can't make it fun?!
The X in Twitter posts makes me want to close them. Musk did NOT think this one through 😆
Can't imagine why some àsshat downvoted you but I fixed it. Have a great day!
Load More Replies...My wife can’t not do this, it’s part of her meal routine and she’s deadly accurate…
My Mom did it at a pizza place and I had to apologize to the table next to us.
You can also smash the paper down to the end if the straw, and then place the little paper carcass in a drop of water and watch it come to life.
I love it when people respond at an age appropriate level to put a child’s mind at ease.
I think this is even better than Sainsbury's renaming their tiger bread because a kid pointed out it doesn't look like a tiger. (https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-16812545, I'll keep looking for a better image of the reply because it's epic. And I can confirm that it was still giraffe bread last time I saw: I'm gluten intolerant and don't like giraffe/tiger bread anyway, so I'm not always paying attention at the bakery, but it makes me smile whenever I see it.)
Load More Replies...This should be said to any child having a bad day. Well done to Mr. Mulligan and the Dublin bus news.
In such a horrible world, this touches my heart and makes me hopeful again.
but what happened, did you say it and he just left, he was more interested, you got married and have been married for thirty years???
According to her followup on Twitter, the guy was nice, but nothing ever evolved with the guy after the first couple dates. She did go on to meet the live if her life though. (all of BP content, unless it is an article specifically asking us , like "Hay Pandas, what is your favorite cooking utensil?" Is from other sources like Reddit, Twitter, and Insta. Some of it years old. The writers of the articles just cut and paste posts from these sites, usually start with around 75 posts, that get reduced down to about 30 of the highest liked ones)
Load More Replies...I fell off my top bunk and somehow landed in the folding chair beside the beds my brother and I used to hold our alarm clock; I was bottom bunk from the on
I fell out of my high bed - about twice the height of a normal bed. As I was falling I thought, “I’m going to break my elbow. I’m definitely going to land on it.” Luckily I managed to catch my legs on my desk and my arms on my bin. I ended up with a permanent scar on my arm from grazing a cupboard but it was pure luck I managed to catch myself.
I remember reading a story where this woman went into labor in the hospital elevator and they delivered the baby there. She was embarrassed, but the hospital staff said "Don't be embarrassed. Last year a woman gave birth in the front lawn of the hospital. Now THAT was a sight. People are still talking about it." She wailed "That was me!!!!!"
Very - I mean highly - humerus! (high becos of the height of the bunk bed. I'm going to sleep now.)
Load More Replies...The team behind the page takes their moderating jobs very seriously. There’s a zero-tolerance approach to offensive or hurtful comments, as well as spam, swear words and links to other pages. “We want this page and its comments to be suitable for all audiences,” they explain that they want to create a family-friendly, all-inclusive atmosphere.
However, some clean memes may still gently poke fun at certain topics, but it’s all done in the name of lighthearted humor.
What did you expect!? His whole family got snapped, he got nobody.
Load More Replies...I did this once on social media too 😂 no one had any idea
They're all cute doggo's! But mine is actually cuter. This is a fact.
Hawkeye is one of my favorite characters to use in the Lego Marvel video game. He's badàss!
Be careful voters! I'm pretty sure this how the Death Star originally got approval. 🤔
Darth Vader would have never gone for that. He doesn’t like sand. It’s coarse, and rough, and irritating.
Load More Replies...Another party leader informed us that she had two pair of boots, one yellow, one red.
This is almost exactly the plot of "Poi Satchi" [Tamil language movie from India]. This movie is available Youtube for free
I once watched the entirety of the princess diaries for free on youtube lol
Load More Replies...My mother, an electrician, learned to pick locks from a toolmaker. She picked the doors of the junior high the first day of winter break because I left my coat there. She also taught me how to.
I, too, know how to pick locks. No, I won't reveal why. I've already mentioned it here but today I'd prefer to wear my International Woman of Mystery hat. Also, "a fawn that was just too small" picked the lock of my heart ❤
"Picked the lock of my heart" was almost as adorable as "a fawn that was just too small" ❤️❤️
Load More Replies...My older sister used to "accidentally" lock me out all of the time, so I learned how to pick a lock. It came in useful at the office 1 day when somebody accidentally locked the bathroom door, while leaving the bathroom and it was inaccessible for staff. I got some "side eye" from some coworkers when they realized that I possessed this particular set of skills. Lol
I learned to pick locks because, when I was younger, I wanted to be a stage magician and escape artist.
the reason I know how to pick a lock is because I like to stargaze, so I asked the building administrator for the key to the roof so on clear nights I could go up there with my telescope, but the nosy lady living on the top floor decided I'm some kind of foreign agent (I literally offered to let her look through the telescope but she recoiled as if I asked her to commit treason) so she keeps changing the padlock... And since I have better things to do than go pester the administrator for the new key every other week, it was the logical choice...
With those credentials, Maggie's got to be an idiot if she doesn't propose.
I had the similar experience: restaurant manager locked himself out of the office and I broke in for him; he was appreciative and, simultaneously, apprehensive (and afterwards would jokingly accuse me of breaking in and stealing shít anytime something got misplaced). I taught myself as a kid because I figured, "Maybe someday I'll wana break into some place?" 🤷🏾♀️
Can There Ever Be Too Much Memes?
Memes can be very powerful. They can temporarily distract us from our problems when the going gets tough. They provide an outlet for laughter, as well as an excuse to spam your friends with very clean funny pics—they help us connect to others. However, as Sudipti Kumar notes in her article on LinkedIn, it’s important to keep an eye on how much time we spend looking at memes. “Excessive meme-viewing,” as she puts it, could be a sign of phone addiction.
Alternatively, spending far too much time enjoying funny clean memes can be a sign that someone’s procrastinating. So memes can be a way of avoiding work, studying, or solving all of those pesky real-life problems that just won’t go away. In moderation, memes are great. But, like with anything, too much of a good thing can backfire. If all you ever do is sit on social media (even if you’re enjoying the lovely memes in this list), it’s not a healthy way to go through life.
He ate it because Marice Sendak books make you feel good on your insides.
as an unofficial taster of all paper, i respect this child greatly
I once went on a residential drama course for teachers. I was an infant scholl teacher =- All the others taught high school. One day we each had to tell a story to the group, that we - or they - could act out. I told them "Where the Wild Things Are". Guess what - it was voted the best story ever.
When you go all spiritual and then realise that the lady probably only does the shop for money and doesn't care about actual spirits
The same with plastic bottles of water in cars... essentially a magnifying glass to send your car into a towering inferno.
I have a ball of polished volcanic glass on my desk, and one summer's day it did indeed burn a small hole in the desk. Lesson learned.
I bought a crystal ball that I was told could predict the weather. For weeks I predicted bad snow storms..... until I realized I got cheated.... It was a snow globe...
My wife insists on buying prisms and hanging them on curtain rails, she gets upset when I take them down citing them as a fire hazard, give it 6 months another will appear.
As long as they don't get direct sunlight you'll be fine. I've got a prism on a side window, it's not caused any problems
Load More Replies...I wanna be a fly on the wall and witness these sorts of things all day. 🤣🤣
Beautiful, absolutely beautiful. The dripping sarcasm just warms the cockles of my heart. I majored in sarcasm from an early age and now, as an old lady gramma, I’m a grand champion. I have always kept the husband, kids and grandkids on their toes never knowing what snarky observations may pour forth from my mind at any time. Being predictable is not my style.
Creating clean memes that stand the test of time is no easy feat. The more you think about it, the more you realize how many hoops a single pic has to jump through to go viral. For instance, ‘Simplified’ notes that the most successful memes will make the audience feel a sense of social validation and like they’re part of a collective.
I saw a show where some famous chef (I want to say Gordon Ramsay, but not sure) showed a bunch of kids what fast food chicken nuggets were made from, then made some from scratch. They overwhelmingly picked the fast food ones anyway & you could see the chef die inside.
Load More Replies...Me and the wife are Master Chef nerds, and once these Chefs had to cook for a bunch of kids. "Elevated Chicken Nuggies" and what have you. It was a fun one.
My wife used to watch shows like that until I told her that was basically sanctioned child abuse. She said, "What do you mean?". I said, "Your pressuring kids into a very subjective tournament with their parents probably verbally whipping them to do well. And when they lose, you probably end their desire to cook as it ends the fun aspect of it and the parents are probably berating them on the way home". She stopped watching.
All these poor people who have never seen Ryan George. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qbrDeZOumsg
I just copied the link to post, but thought I check nobody else had!
Load More Replies...I hope the people who design those videos see this and make it a series.
Watch hi ho kids on YouTube. They taste cuisine from around world and eat their parents and grands favorite dishes. They're hilarious.
When I was a kid I actually DID do an experiment on moldy bread (the question I picked was "how much salt is required to stop it going moldy"). I won a prize and one of the judges sincerely thanked me for bringing pictures of the moldy bread and not the bread itself. In fact I had already tossed it into the chicken pen.
Lol I did something similar in college. I had to do a leaf notebook for botany, and the night before due date, I was out collecting leaves and then microwaving them to dry them out. Prof never knew.
Yesterday I threw out some potatoes that could have come in third. Had been noticing a bit of a smell in my kitchen. Kept checking the compost bucket, trash can etc. Moved something yesterday and found a bag with four potatoes left in it that were literally turning to liquid. Nasty.
Ugh, that is a nasty smell. I once left a small basket of red potatoes in my trunk in the dead of summer in Texas. Took me weeks to figure out what the horrible smell was. I thought maybe a mouse had died inside my car door. All this to show how messy my trunk was.
Load More Replies...This is something Roy Wood Junior would say in the Daily Show. Not sure whether this happened in real life.
Fast, useful thinking, an ability to present a cogent argument and enough understanding of a biology concept to synthesise results. Somebody hire this guy.
A character in a book I read did exactly this, he forgot about the science fair so he grabs a moldy sandwich from his locker and makes it into an exhibit
The ONE chance there was a perfect set up for a "drink me, eat me" adventure and dude blew it... 🤦♂️
I was just imagining the police having to field calls from us pandas reporting a break in: “A frog’s house??? And a bored panda reported it??”
Load More Replies...B&E plus robbery, not accounting for the heartbreak to Mr. Frog, seeing all his saving taken away.
Some other things that make these very clean funny pics stand out from the crowd on social media require a bit of patience on the creator’s part. Sure, you can fire off a bunch of memes and see what sticks, but if you want to have a decent following, you want to post higher-quality memes than your competition. And the first step toward that is figuring out what kind of niche you’re aiming for.
This is a photo from last summer's Sheepspeare in the Park: Rameo and Jeweliet. (The balcony scene, from Rameo's perspective.)
From the balcony, it would have been a shear drop, needing a fleece to break the fall.
Load More Replies...Does anyone know that people used to do this so that it was camouflaged against air attacks
It probably kept them warm as well. Not sure about fire risk, though.
Load More Replies...This is cool. I would put a door in upside down for my cats. First, i need to quadruple my income so that I can buy a house to put the door in.
As it should be. Actually, shouldn't be a cross at all. Religion = poison.
Load More Replies...This is an old post and I think the company actually paid them for this poster later.
So glad McDonalds gave them $50K for the picture. It was well done.
Friends of mine did basically the same thing at a local sushi parlor, when they passed the spot three days later it was removed. I think that's about the only time ever I'll say McD did better than your average local sushi shop.
Wow! You just gave them free advertising! I hope they responded by giving you free food for life!
You could, for instance, go for the broadest audience imaginable. If you’re posting family-friendly, clean memes that are actually funny, the odds are that you’ll appeal to a very wide social media user base. On the flip side, if you’re narrowing down your focus and lasering in on particular topics or spicier humor, you’re giving up some segments of your potential audience for the sake of others.
My hair likes to walk the fine line of "Luscious coils" and "Buckwheat"
I want to start a support group for people without hair having to listen to people with hair complain about it. Enjoy it while it lasts!
Many hairdressers have told me I have very fine hair. This means it turns into a humiliating frizz every time the weather is even slightly damp.
*sits in corner nonchalantly eating Krispy Kreme #7.5*
Load More Replies...LOL I drank a coke AND ate a donut this morning. Mondays are hard. I have no regrets, :)
My friend made this specific viral chart. It's amazing to see how far it has gone.
6? I once ate 24 Krispy Kremes because my employer bought far too many, and they were going to be thrown out. Amazingly, I don't have diabeties.
At least 20% are hole and another 25% air bubbles...how bad can they be?
You mean you don't already know about jelly donut units?
Load More Replies...A shelf in my closet hods nothing but cables. And I still don't have the one I need...
Load More Replies...Noted. I've purged from time to time and then bam. A friend out of no where says. "This old harddrive has data I need on it." Bro, I'm sorry I just threw out my adaptor for that. Moral of the story. A hoarder will one day save the day because of something they hoarded, assuming of course they can find it among the other 10000 cables.
Also you must have a junk drawer in your kitchen, it's essential to life.
Be thankful, after my Dad died, we were clearing out his sheds and a garage and I found an old tea chest full of wires / cables / electrical stuff (Dad was an engineer and worked on the basis of ' oh, that'll come in useful ' for pretty much everything he kept. In this chest I found a wiring loom, 2 headlights, 2 rear light clusters and several switches that looked vaguely familiar ; they were from my first ever car, a Bond Bug (look it up on google), that I'd scrapped after it died around 35 years previously - I'd kept it at their place as they were in the country and I was in a large town with nowhere to keep a knackered vehicle, then arranged for it to be picked up by a local scrapyard !!! They had moved house at least 3 times since then .... Slightly happy ending is that I sold all of the bits for about £400 as Bonds are quite rare ... Miss you Da x
The important thing here is that you personally enjoy the clean memes you’re sharing and crafting. Otherwise, if you’re just doing it for the likes, views, and clicks, you’ll end up being burned out. This is because if you want any chance of gaining long-term popularity, you have to be consistent in how you post. Whether that’s a few times a day, once every couple of days, or once a week. Your passion for the memes you share has to shine through.
I left a secret message on my childhood bedroom floor while the carpet was being replaced. It wasn't anything funny; just some song lyrics I liked plus the date. I suppose at least one person will now be wondering what the lyrics were, so it was "Carry the weight of the world" from the song "Weight of the World" by Apoptygma Berzerk, from their album "Rocket Science". I still listen to it to this day! Damn good album. Damn good band.
This sounds like a story I heard years ago in the UK where someone bought a secondhand, handbuilt, sports car as "as seen", ie no guarantee. Every time he accelerated there was this noise, a sort of metallic scraping noise and the same when he braked. He took it to the garage repair place and they looked at everything and nothing could have been causing this noise, so they opened parts of the chassis, where there are sort of sealed boxes and finally found a flexible piece of wire which had several metal nuts on the end, which moved making the noise and a note which said " Oh you finally found it, did you ? "
Not anymore. From what I heard, it was stolen by a frog. 😉😂
Load More Replies...I'm super jealous that I didn't think of this first.
Load More Replies...Use screenshot of error alert as wallpaper. People will keep clicking ok or cancel without any results lol
A classic... screenshot of desktop... put the screenshot as wallpaper and remove all the icons .. look at the owner of the PC clicking again and again trying to figure out why nothing is working
Load More Replies...I have a blank purple page with links to my most-visited sites as my browser's home page. My brother (we're both over 50 and he has a wife!) changed it to a picture of the trollface, just *slightly" off from the other purple. I didn't notice it for about a month.
My brother and I would sometimes come to a dead stop on a busy footpath (sidewalk) when we were a lot younger, and point at the top of any tall building and say loudly "Oh No ... DON'T JUMP!! Soon there would be quite a crowd of people straing to see something that wasn' there and pointing, while my brother and I would just walk away smirking and chuckling. Good cheap entertainment.
I don't understand half the things that come out of a 2yo's mouth let alone a full sentence.
Load More Replies...Very funny and relateable. But there's no way the two year old said that.
Have people who doubt this never been around 2 yr olds? They can and do talk like this. Maybe not all, but some do, especially if they're younger. My 2nd son was incredibly verbal at an early age-probably from being around his older sister. And speaking in full sentences is totally normal, developmentally, for kids ages 2-3. AND sometimes they say things you don't expect because they're repeating things they've heard from the children's shows they watch.
I have no doubt this is true. I'm sure there are many factors but in my experience, kids who have focused adult attention all day (like grandma) speak this way (and use grandma's catch phrases) before age 3
Load More Replies...My friend's two year old said "oh f*CK Mummy, not eggs for breakfast AGAIN?!" ( I was there.) She also said "I didn't know cars had batteries, I thought they had engines" when her Dad said the battery was flat in the family car. Two year olds can be amazingly articulate.
Load More Replies...You moved with athleticism you did not know you possessed, to paraphrase Dylan Moran.
The most successful funny clean memes will always be relatable to the viewer. That’s what helps them go viral. If they’re too obscure or confusing, your audience might not vibe with the image as much as you hoped. Similarly, if they’re too generic and bland, they might not get much time in the spotlight either. Essentially, you want something that’s entertaining and relatable, but surprising.
I once bought a set of batteries, but they weren’t included, so I had to buy them again.
This is part of a longer story or stolen from that story. The year before the guy gave his niece a toy for Xmas but forgot to include any batteries for it. The batteries are what she gifted him for the following Xmas.
One year when I was very young (I'm 72 now), on Christmas day I went door to door selling batteries. I sold them all, apparently a lot of parents forgot to get them.
She certainly did lol. Also, does this mean she used the same molds for soapmaking as she did for food-making? Not the best of practices....but I guess a little soap mouth cant hurt.
Load More Replies...Imagine if it was reversed and you tried to wash yourself with chocolate
Wouldn't be too bad, cocoa butter is a good cleanser, you just have to rinse more to get rid of the cocoa mass, the brown part. And I am not an evil aunt
Load More Replies...Personal story here. Pure soap doesn't actually taste too bad. So last week I tried "milk and honey" hand wash. My advice: don't.
That reminds me of Christmas presents a few years ago. We could smell something highly scented in the bag of gifts but couldn't work out which one it was, what we did find wrapped up was what thought was a bar of chocolate, you could feel the squares on it. So we decided we'd better open it and eat it before the aroma ruined it...it turned out the 'bar of chocolate' was scented wax
Sister and I, about 4 years old then, were finally large enough to reach the mirror cabinet in the bathroom. We found a bar of curd soap ("Kernseife" in german) and, later, found ourselves asked about bitemarks. Soap tastes disgusting!
You would smell it first though But the comment killed me The long con
You couldn’t smell it was soap? Or notice it didn’t melt in your hand this time. Hmm, maybe she was super devious and used a soap fragrance that smelled like white chocolate.
2020 crushed the last of my hope and optimism. Now, I'm just enjoying the downhill ride.
"Enjoying the downhill ride", I'll have to keep that in mind while I spiral further into the pit of despair with no bottom to finally snap my neck on anywhere in sight. Thanks, gives me a new perspective.
Load More Replies...You might also want to consider making your very funny clean pics as universal as possible. Sure, you can make the pics comment on current events, but then you’re running the risk that once the event is forgotten, the joke will have lost its context. On the other hand, commenting on common human experiences, adding in a big dollop of humor, and picking the best possible images is going to be a powerful concoction.
There are few words to describe exactly how much a hate all the Geico commercials. ALL of them. That one I'd watch.
My first car was a larger, green version of the Geiko Lizard's red Healey Sprite.
i’m from 3846, can confirm it does in fact get a little better.
Load More Replies...For a while I called 2016 the worst year of my entire life. Oh how wrong I was.
2016 was definitely still one of the worst years of my life
Load More Replies...Oh and Marty... you've got to do something about your kids (Doc - Back to the Future 2)
I just read this in Christopher Lloyd voice
Load More Replies...If I could go back to any time before April 2016, I’m there! (That’s when I got sick and my life got turned upside down in case anyone wondered!)
For the same reason, I would go back to any time before 1997
Load More Replies...haha Drew Curtis is actually a friend of mine (I'm also a Fark mod)
I'm sorry to hear that. :) IC Weener is a turd. Num num the lobster for life.
Load More Replies...I don't know 2016 through 2019 were pretty good. 2020 on however have sucked mightily, for varying reasons.
Oh my goodness. This made me laugh. I remember when my kids were babies and I would do something silly and they would laugh with their whole little bodies.
The BEST!! Ugh, those little giggles kill me. I miss my babies!
Load More Replies...Babies laughing is one of the best sounds in the world! One time I started singing along to the music on his jumper/toy table like "doo doo do do doo" and he laughed so hard snot came flying out of his nose. It was the first time he REALLY laughed and it was magical. I have a video of it and I still pull it up all the time. He's 7 now. :)
Mine is 34, and I still remember the first time he belly laughed like it was yesterday. Magical.
Load More Replies...My boyfriend was in the yard with my 3-year old granddaughter & I went inside for a minute to get something. She tried to run to the front yard & he was worried he couldn't catch here, so he stopped & put his hand to his ear & said "ring-ring," She stopped and answered. She's 5 now & it still works.
smushy babys are so fun~ they just like know there like fat chubby smushy and just chill with you, a many days I spent on the couch with one of my lil cousins sitting on me or on the couch too, and thinking he was making the person on tv move~ lil story about it, it was years later that he told me he thought he beat DMC2 when he was 2 as he remembered "playing it" and beating it, when it was really me controlling him he was so upset cause he told his class he beat that "hard boss" when he was only 2 {lol I played the long con on that I think}
My oldest son (40) making elephant sounds with his arm for a trunk made my granddaughter (3) laugh so hard everyone at the table had to stop eating because now everyone at the table was laughing. Then she tried doing the sound back at him with her little arm flinging all of the place and we all ended up with sore sides and cold food from laughing so much. Great Thanksgiving dinner. Nothing fancy about the meal except a forty year old waving his nose/arm around making his niece get the best case of the giggles.
One night my daughter made her baby brother laugh so hard he spit up. It was so sweet watching them play like that. Had to make her stop and give him a break after the spit up though.
I tried to watch Scooby Doo at the gym, but I forgot my glasses, and I can't see a thing without my glasses.
To be fair it’s a genius idea! Don’t they say like walk, run, sprint in bursts?
Load More Replies...It actually takes some minor skill to format all of the columns uniformly to the right width and to fill the cells like that. I don’t buy that grandma stumbled upon this as described.
I discover stuff like this by clicking on random buttons. It's entirely possible
Load More Replies...Excel is a helluva lot harder to use than MSPaint for that purpose. I know this because I've used both to create knitting and counted cross stitch patterns. I have two basic templates in Paint for craft patterns: 1 for knitting, counted cross stitch, and bead weaving; the other is for peyote beading.
My husband made a slanted brickwork pattern for me which was perfect for needlepoint patterns, especially for circles
Load More Replies...Tbf, I learnt how to format all columns by trying to change the width of one.
I dunno...my grandma was a brilliant tatter. Could her granddaughter figure out tatting? Naaah... I was too stupid. (sigh)
mines covered in glitter and googly eyes and his name is biblically accurate roomba
Load More Replies...Mine is called Minion. Coz he's an underling that does my bidding. And when I registered the purchase for the warranty, one of the questions was: have you named it, and What is it's name. And when I rang support, they referred to him by name! I adore nerds.
My Roomba's name in Gondor because he gets stuck on random things and then starts beeping and his light starts flashing. The moment we here the beep either myself or one of my kids will tell "THE BEACONS ARE LIT!! GONDOR CALLS FOR AID".....My husband hates me sometimes lol
mine is obsessed with my piano, just goes under it and vacuums over and over and over. His name is Robbie.
I'd love to have a roomba but that would just be a very expensive chewtoy; my dogs are dïcks
My biggest worry is that my roomba will eat "something special" that my dog left on the ground. Do ya just have to throw them (the roomba not the dog) away at that point?
Load More Replies...My uncle got him and his wife brand new GMC suvs. They're bigger inside than my first apartment. They won't let anything be transported in them just in case it leaves a crumb of anything. Why even have a vehicle like that?
My neighbor asked why I sold my Chevy equinox when I got my ford Bronco. Told me he almost never drives his Tacoma to keep the miles low. Like, why would I get a new vehicle to not drive it?
Load More Replies...I sincerely hope this is secretly a thing, somewhere- maybe in the back woods- banjo playing territory, all the hillbillies just get together on weekends to go "Ute jousting"
Load More Replies...Came to post this. A pickup truck by definition can carry 4 x 8 foot sheets of plywood flat in the bed. What they're selling now is overpriced gas guzzling "sedans" with open-air trunks.
Load More Replies...That's a BRAND DAMN NEW TRUCK! It's got paper tags! Ooh I bet someone got an asß whooping for that...
My boyfriends mom's ex was like this with his truck, he bought a brand new off the truck truck kind of truck, he had it for 2 years and traded it in because the bed got scratched by something
Why, just why? You have a truck bed. Unless it's full of something important and breakable I see no reason for this...unless of course your cover back there is stuck, or locked and you forgot the keys.
She was probably singing to the classic song by Nat King Cole... "Unforgettable.... That's What You Are....."
I'm sorry Trash Panda, but I'm afraid I can't do that.
Load More Replies...Tip. When google says...is that you loggin in on another device? Dont absently minded click no. Unless you want a quiz show game where you MUST know all the answers on the first question It then wiped my phone, my passwords, my backup access and even my bank app.
Just going through a similar phase with changing supplier for the house including them wanting to send a confirmation code to the phone number that no longer exists
Computer: Have you used this device before? Me: Every weekday for the past 20 years.
I landed myself into a peculiar situation while setting up my Pixel again after a reset from it being repaired...I needed to confirm both on my Pixel and my older Samsung that it was, in fact, me. There was an email in there somewhere too.
Helpful though when google has brought to my attention that my mom has been stalking me on my google SCHOOL ACCOUNT… 🤣🤣🤣
Wait is this not where you all keep your carrots? For all the ills of social media this one really helped me out. Tifo tifu.
The hottest new trend in kitchen decor. I feel there should be a picture of a rabbit somewhere.
Load More Replies...You have great faith in your children not to burn the whole house down in the meantime!
Top corner with the blue outline. Hope this helped 😉
Load More Replies...Now watch this video from our beloved sponsors to find out why I was studying in Rome.
There is a reason the stories are included in recipes. You can not copyright an individual recipe posted. A cookbook can be copyrighted because of the organization, etc, it gets counted as a unique intellectual property. The stories included in the single recipes allows it to fall under the same protection, so corporations can't steal the recipe and sell it as part of a cook book.
I always scroll super fast down to the comments, then work my way back up from there.
My friends and I in college had a pumpkin carving contest party. There were beautifully done pumpkins from artsy kids: a dragon, skulls, awesome faces, I did the screaming Mohawk guy from a favorite album... When votes were tallied up the one that had "c*nt" carved into it won 😂
A dog will always ha g out with ya. It's why they make the bestest friends.
Coming from a cat, this is especially heartwarming
Load More Replies...Dogs love you no matter how old you are, how old they are and you can stink too.
Cats won't hang out with you at any age..... And if they could text you.... They wouldn't...
Dogs own wanting to be with you constantly. Cats pretend it's an accident that they're in your lap, banging their head into your hand for pets. To prove it's an accident, after 2.5 seconds of pets, they glare at you and walk away.
Load More Replies...7 year old - that changes things a bit. I know a few 7 year olds who can times by two.
Load More Replies...An animal rescue place near me has injured beavers recuperate temporarily in keepers’ houses. They will try to put sofa cushions in the shower.
I was going to say this. It isn't the sight of the water as much as the sound. I was watching a documentary about ethical beaver control and the one way that actually works is to hook up a speaker under rocks where you WANT the beavers to build a dam and play rushing water sounds out of it continuously.
Load More Replies...We had yearling beavers in a creek by my college courtyard, they built a tiny damn. 🤣
Me and my dogs were at the river one day, a little inlet, my dogs just swims across to the other side, and then I just hear this plop, and then just see this little beaver swimming around, my dog swimming after him, then the beaver just goes completely underwater, I have never seen such a confused look on my dog's face...he didn't understand where he went
The spikes on the end of a Stegosaurus’ tail have been named after a Far Side cartoon. Now known as a Thagomiser!
They also name them after Tolkien and Harry Potter characters so yeah, it happens
Load More Replies...Some megafauna have been named more recently, and gave us "thingodonta", "weirdodonta", "montypythonoides" and others even funnier.
There is a type of pachycephalosaur named a Dracorex which was Harry Potter inspired
Isn't the rate of dinosaur discovery/identification increasing rather than decreasing?
or, "all no" and "good worries". i'm not sure if i want to know what either of those would mean.
Load More Replies...In 6th grade at a church activity, I was trying to say either "for the fun of it" or "the heck of it" and blended the f.u of fun and c.k of heck really loud! It sounded all weird but was clearly not an appropriate word! Oh I was so embarrassed
Oh hell no, please come sit at the head table. John get the fúck up!
Load More Replies...I like how the legs are dangling, so you know they're just swinging and flipping around everytime he moves!
weathermans spend all day pointing at a green screen just guessing where that darn storm gonna be
The dangly legs ruin it. Next time, attach them to the host's legs, and have the feet flat, as if standing.
He was trying to bring a little levity to another dreary drought forecast: "Here, here and here it'll be bone-dry for eternity."
I'm glad I'm not a weather person. I'd be taking this to the extreme for every major holiday, wacky US/international days...
Get yourself a lil' hole in a tree with a nice door...start making money 💰
Schroeder and Lucy’s rubber band. Dare anyone to find/know what I mean!
It's a drag when you have the power to make someone's life miserable, but when you try to use it for that it just doesn't work. I hope the witch had a wonderful rest of the day, full of smiles, butterflies and sparkly flowers. That'll teach her.
Does anyone know how to say "Happy Hanukkah" in its respective language? Asking for a friend
I grew up with people/family that watched westerns when I was super young, they would blow on their beers, so now I do the same when I open a soda, it was a imprinted unknowingly
This is basically where the term "blowing hot and cold comes from". Once a faun saw a man walking through the woods, blowing on his hands. He asked "why are you doing that?" and the man said "because I'm cold". "Well," said the faun, "Why don't you come to my home and I'll give you some nice soup." When the soup was served the man blew on that as well. The faun asked why, and the man said "Because it's hot." "Well then get out!" said the faun. "I cannot trust someone who blows both hot and cold!"
Did that at Fred Meyer (Kroger). When I was returning my cart a guy said "I'll take it." I said "I left some gas in it for you." His wife looked at him puzzled, but he knew the routine and said "Good man."
I say that to everyone who takes my cart as I am leaving the store. The blank looks are funnier than the comeback line.
i was not born under The Bees, as i do not have thoughts, emotions, or friends
Well there are some people that don't fit into some of those criteria. I mean, some people just can't experience emotions or don't have friends, and what about ambiverts? I'm just saying, "yes, the average person experiences these things, but not EVERYONE does. It's purely an average that some people don't fit into."
Had a lady wanting to return a fountain pop after 6 hours because it was watered down.... Crazy ice melting after only 6 hours
When my daughter was 7, we got her a turtle which always huffily turned his little head away from any other food that wasn't his much-loved tomato, which he would devour with the same speed and gusto as you would with your favourite pizza or burger. One day he hurt a claw in the garden so the vet prescribed antibiotic drops, which we were supposed to administer directly in his mouth ("good luck with that", he added, "otherwise you'll have to bring him in every day for an injection"...) Needless to say, it turned out to be literally impossible to get the drops into his mouth, so we (craftily, we thought) put the drops inside half a tomato. Turns out he was onto us, because when he approached the tomato, he stopped right next to it, sniffed the air above it and turned his little head up toward us as if to say "do I look stupid to you ?!" and huffily walked away... So then for the next 10 days it was a daily trip to the vet for his injection...
My sister had a huge African spurred tortoise named Otis. No one was allowed to have red or orange painted toenails in her house or he would nip them. Otherwise, he was super chill and friendly.
Is Yoda the angel? Is Yoda the turtle? Is he both of them? Is he neither of them? Is he something in between?
well, this makes the Pokemon Litwick a bit cuter, despite what it Does... "This Pokémon takes lost children by the hand to guide them to the spirit world/ The younger the life this Pokémon absorbs, the brighter and eerier the flame on its head burns."
I talk that way to my wheelchair. It tries to fight me on the bus.
Load More Replies...When the AI takes over the planet, Roomba's with kind owners like these are gonna stand by our side.
The cofferdams are real! The pics from late 1800s etc when they built the New York bridges are insane
Load More Replies...It's common practice when replacing a bridge to build adjacent to the old bridge so there is no interruption of traffic.
Load More Replies...Like that seen from spider man into the spider verse Parent "Play Dumb" Kid" I'm a police" Parent "Not that dumb"
As a woman I can confirm it works. But works even better if the cheese is grated on top of spaghetti.
I have had good results with cheese melted on tortilla chips as well.
Load More Replies...Are we just going to skip over the whole stealing a shoe, filling it with herbs, and hanging it over your bed as a love option thing?
Yes because that won't work, especially when she finds out your stole her shoe.
Load More Replies...You can also attract women by giving them chips (fries). My colleague and I were eating lunch at a pavement cafe in Malta, when a woman came up and asked if she could have a chip. She came back for another one a bit later. My colleague ate the rest very quickly. Can't think why. LOL
I mean, that would be one of the easier names to remember from LOTR 🤣🤣
If you can't remember Bilbo, your mind is not nearly dirty enough.
Load More Replies...🤣🤣🤣 this is even better than the south park where they find out Token's name is Tolkien. For some reason this read like an ICP song in my head tho!
totally not me who ignored the doorbell literal minutes ago
did you know that tolkien based the characters of lord of the rings off of mythic images in our collective unconscious, it was a little weird for me when i started to connect with gollum, i think like that all the time, i'll be in line at a restaurant and start thinking, "we gets the ice cream." "dont get it it'll make us fat"
Someone's never been in a forest and seen all the pigeons. Yes, they really do live in forests too.
Are you sure you know the difference between pigeons and mourning doves?
Load More Replies...Rock doves, living on cliff faces, scrounging for food. Humans create stone/brick/cement structures. Humans are messy and sloppy. Rock doves seize the opportunity.
Now I'm picturing pigeons anxiously hopping from one foot to the other muttering "Oh god, I hope they invent statues or cars real soon!"
Feral pigeons evolved from Rock Doves that nested on rocky cliffs and outcrops. That’s why they love buildings.
I often wonder if bin chickens go out in nature and are just, "WHERE ARE ALL THE BINS??"
And, have one on me as well! Thank you for your service... 8-)
Load More Replies...Aragorn son of Arathorn and Boromir heir to the steward of Gondor would like to have a word with this
*fades into the void where i also lost my cello as a child*
Don’t worry, I once lost a pipe band. Yes, 20+ bagpipes in full blare. Plus drums. I am still confused.
I knew a guy who lost his cello once. He set it on the ground next to his car so he could unlock the back door to put it in the back. After setting it on the ground, he unlocked the car, threw his backpack into the back seat, got into the car, and left. The cello case was brightest-blue, it was afternoon, sunny, with no cloud in sight -- seemingly impossible settings for losing anything, let alone such a big instrument. Some dude found it on the side of the road and brought it to the music department of our university, saying, "Prolly one of y'all left it there!" So yeah, it's possible.
On a bit of a random note, I play the viola. 😁
Load More Replies...As a cellist I assure you it's very possible and I also don't know how this instrument is fun :')
I was convinced for a while that my 4 year-old was in a gang. I would find graffiti on my walls and stickers. My Little Pony was apparently the leader.
I stopped my kids from creating wall art by allowing them to create window art. Damn, I should have known better!
My son became obsessed with all the former Presidents when he was about six, and once wrote "KENNEDY" on the wall outside his bedroom door.
I was gullible and believed an adult that told me if you plant the sesame seeds from the tops of buns it will grow a bread tree! 🙄
There's a Nazareth and a Bethlehem in Pennsylvania, both within about a 30 minute drive of where I grew up. I used to think Jesus was born basically right down the road from me.
This is how people thought spontaneous generation happened before Pasteur.
People not sucking. I feel like that would help life get better as one ages.
Load More Replies...My mind when a ladybug lands on me: MiRaCulOuS SiMply thE bEsT
You will love ladybugs until a swarm of THOUSANDS of them descends on your neighbourhood in a red and black cloud, crawls over all your belongings and pees on everything. I went through this while on a camping trip. All I had to hide in was a flimsy tent. They were everywhere, it was like Hitchcock's The Birds but worse
This is the truth, I've experienced it as well! Cute when just a couple, seriously disturbing in mass!
Load More Replies..." So, being a Ladybug automatically makes me a girl, Is that it, Fly-boy?"
Me: Look at the lovely butterflies! Also me: ughh! Horrible caterpillars have chewed my lettuce crop!
(Ladybug.. Deep voice).... What's this ma'am c**p ?.. I'm a dude... Can't you tell us apart? We can....
It's not important that humans can tell the difference. It's important that ladybugs can.
Load More Replies...It was a cold, dark, stormy night, when (owner of FedEx) set out to deliver an important package. They, however, had absolutely no idea that this mere parcel would change their life forever.
Load More Replies...Comes through... the wall, the doors, the windows and maybe even a roof or two!
I locked myself out of my apartment once, randomly called a local locksmith, he helped me into my apartment, nothing special. A WEEK later I locked myself out of my apartment again (the how doesn't matter, ahem). I again chose a random locksmith to call, waited.. and the very same dude appeared, saw me, gave me this long suffering look and sighed: "I thought I recognised the address." Cue embarassment.
Did the first AAA guy also have to wait for at least 2h, like anyone else normally does?
Me with my short-term memory, unable to say the word right and hope they will understand cause I can't remember how to pronounce the actual word with my messed up mouth and heavy lisp, then listening to them laugh when I step away about my scars and funny way of talking: OW MY FEELINGS
I feel this so much... just finished Wings of Fire a few months back and I felt this SO much
My son once ordered a Wonder Woman branded single-serve coffee maker off Amazon. No idea why.
HOW?! How does a child order Uber Eats, and why did the parent give them the password to their phone...?
It said the mom left her phone unlocked, so there wasn’t a passcode needed to open it (since it was always on and open)
Load More Replies..."I knew you'd come back for me." Sounds *mildly* (see what I did there? 😉) threatening.
I love the scenario where a kidnapping victim is so annoying, they're glad to give him/her back.
Why have I never realised that librarian would be my ideal job. I’m am so good at shhhhing, the worlds too loud.
Realistically? Because librarians are supposed to know where all the books are and how to find them, as well as how to research whatever someone needs books to research. Have info on all the news articles that have been archived, ECT. Sorry. I know you were probably joking.
Load More Replies...This is literally my dream job. Payed to tell people to shut up, and to use the scan-gun thingy on books? Just to name two things! I wish 📚💛
Only if you severely overstuffed the first taco would you have enough to make nachos from the second one. My take on this one is to just skip the intermediate steps and go straight for the nachos, cuz you can load those bad boys up as much as you want and if you still have toppings leftover you just grab the bag and keep going...
Load More Replies...A YouTuber named unnecessary inventions made a thing like this where you eat a burrito over a chute and it fall into a taco and you can eat it
The only things hot enough to equate to the heat of the core are... Pizza Rolls!!
Wait…did you just find out the secret to hot pockets and pizza rolls? I always did tell people it’s molten lava when cooked at the specific time
Load More Replies...It's indeed a Chinese dumpling.. because is round ...the ravioli is for flat-earthers...
Isn’t the inner core solid though. The solid is encased in a liquid which is encased in a semi liquid encased in a solid
I just tested this and I could jump at least 5 cm maybe even 10, lol. That's something like half a banana for scale
Thank you for using standard banana measurements.
Load More Replies...I'm short enough that jumping is the only way I can see the top shelf of my cabinets 🥲
And gracefully landed on your feet! I did the same one time and I probably looked graceful until I hit the ground and fractured my arm 😃
Load More Replies...I jumped out of a bus this afternoon because it wasn't close enough to the curb.
I jumped recently Part of outdoor fitness But i avoid pools of literal lava Or any abyss with weird birds flying low
Now I can't think of anything other than how comical the game characters who know how to jump look from the point of view of the npc character, because sometimes the game character moves faster by jumping. Happy frolicking in the meadows.By the way, the answer is yesterday. I jumped yesterday.
That's accurate. It came in the form of AOL discs that looked like cds you put into the disc drive on your very large desk top. If you saved enough of them, you'd have like 800 hours of the Internet!
Before AOL came on CD, it came on a 3.5 inch floppy disk. I called it the "Floppy of the Month" club.
Beat me to it. I was going to say insurance wouldn’t cover their injuries.
Load More Replies...Jesus be a fence! WHAT is that guy growing to attract that literal army of adult slugs?! 😳
Ugh, I hate slugs! They freak me out and they have been coming into my house. Hubby put out bowls of cheap beer and they have been hanging out there instead.
spread diatomaceous earth, slugs won't cross it
Load More Replies...Reminds me of the time we had a caravan on a camping lot in the netherlands. every year when going there after the winter one of the first things to do was to get rid of all the slugs...
Umm work calendars are never private.. it is called a "work calendar" for a reason
Whoa Alexandra, slow down there, don’t want us thinking you’re crazy. (JK JK 😁)
Load More Replies...Periods sound too cold and calculating, and exclamation marks sound too loud and too exited so I just chose not to punctuation anymore
He's my go to voice for most things; gets a little wierd sometimes
Load More Replies...Have been at a roundabout and watched a driver cross in front of my van from the wrong direction. Same reason I always look to my right before pulling out when lights turn green because of the numbnuts who speed through the red... (NZers drive on the left)
All the best English-speaking countries drive on the left. They also speak proper English.
Load More Replies...They are putting up roundabouts here in Texas where I live. We drive on the right, so all of the roundabouts are counter-clockwise (anti-clockwise for those of you not from the US). I have seen people pull up to the roundabout, come to a complete stop, signal and go clockwise around the roundabout to make a left turn, treating it like the 4 way stop it replaced. And the majority of people here will pull up and stop even though the roundabout is completely empty.
Where I live, you have to bc of crosswalks.... I feel like putting those in a roundabout is putting ENTIRELY too much faith in the human race!
I remember when they put a roundabout at the bottom of a decline in the mountains. When it snowed it was easier to go straight across. It was quite entertaining to watch.
to be fair you need to. Look "behind" to see if anyone's coming, look "ahead" because, well, you're driving a car and that's kinda required.
You all need to be like Carter.....He's out saving everyone 15% on their car insurance...
In just 15 minutes he can save you up to 15% or more
Load More Replies..."Private Carter, I didn't see you a camouflage training today!" "Sir, thank you, sir!"
There must be a tie breaker, can't be exactly even with an odd number of votes :P
It's probably 50.08 to 49.91 and they rounded both to 50.
Load More Replies...It's every two months. Twice a month is biweekly. Cuz that's how most people get paid.
By the logic of the meaning of the word bi-monthly literally meaning both things, bi-weekly might mean every other week, or twice a week. Logically it makes sense to pick one though and stick to it. Though the XKCD comic about "could care less" vs "couldn't care less" comes to mind here.
Load More Replies...Odd number of votes, shouldn't there be a decimal of difference in one direction?
We use biweekly which usually means every 2 weeks so wouldn't bimonthly be every 2 months?
say that to doctors offices. I couldn't email my referal, it had to come by fax *facepalm*
There are tons of websites that allow you to send some faxes for free. Love em!
Load More Replies...You do know there are services that you can email your document to and they will fax it for you. Also did you know that faxing is the safest way to send private info ? When was the last time you heard that a fax machine got hacked ? So don't slam faxing...
Well said!! In the US, Staples and the UPS stores are convenient options...
Load More Replies...This is, what German tourists in the Netherlands, in need of a prescription from their doctor at home, frequently run into. German doctor will only send fax. Dutch pharmacy is chill with foreign prescription, but threw their fax machine out 15 years ago. No medication, because it is not easy to get an appointment at a Dutch doctor in tourist regions. During holiday season the number of inhabitants raise from 20.000 to 200.000 at the same time (18 million in total within the whole season). Due to European vacation rules, most people stay two to three weeks (of their annual 4 to 6 weeks, and yes, this is fully paid time with extra money). So the doctors cannot cope, tourists need to use an app first for everything not worthy to call 112/999, in their mothertongue, to get into contact with a doctor and depending on that, an appointment or transfer to the hospital.
Amazes me that America still uses fax machines. I had a job less than a decade ago working in a university and one of my students received money from the US Veterans department. They insisted I could only return signed forms to them by fax. It took a member of my staff a week to get an IT person to scour dusty storerooms to see if they could find an old fax machine somewhere, and a further week to actually get the thing to work!
Therefore, we can conclude, based on these results, that in fact this is a very good way of meeting the word count.
Pah. Amateur. 'Therefore, it is possible to conclude, based upon the current results, that there is a simpler way to enlarge the amount of words used to document this procedure. However, it should be noted that, whilst we have attempted to investigate all options, time constraints mean that there might be some data which improves upon our current methodology and falls outside the remit of this document".
Load More Replies...*does the exact opposite because I need less words and not more* ETA: forgot a word :p
I literally have to say out loud to myself "top lock" as I lock the deadbolt then "bottom lock" when I lock the handle, so that I remember that I locked my door. So that when I get out to the car, I don't wonder if I locked the door, because I remember hearing myself say it.
That's why we have cameras on our cell phone: so we can photograph ourselves turning off the oven and locking the front door. Sheesh.
I've gotten to the corner, and will turn around and go back to see if I closed the gate.
When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade! Make life take the lemons back. Get mad! You don’t want life’s lemons, what are these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it gave you lemons! Does life know who you are? You’re the person who’s going to burn life’s house down. With the lemons! You’re gonna get engineers to create a combustable lemon to burn houses down!
I had a sticker of Happy Bunny that said, "when life gives you lemons, squirt them in the eyes of your enemies."
There’s a running joke in Monsters Inc that whenever there’s a photo of Mike, something’s always covering his face, but instead of being disappointed, he’s always excited that there’s a photo of him. So the joke is that the credits of the film that was being watched are covering Mike’s face in the picture for Monsters Inc, but the caption is written as if it’s being said by Mike, who’s just excited to be on Disney plus
Load More Replies...I had a good laugh at this thread. Thank you, as I needed cheering up.
This was just so feel good! Honestly one of my favorite BP posts ever.
Thank you so much BP. I really, really needed something positive right now.
As a toker, it nearly killed me to click the green arrow as it was on 420, but this needs as many up arrows as it can get! I had to wade through FAR too many AITA type posts to get here.
Thanks for this ....it's old but it helped me smile and I haven't smiled in a bit been dealing with a lot
I hope things get better for you, Francine. Be kind to yourself if you can.
Load More Replies...I'd had a good day anyway but this whole thread made it even gooder. Yes, I know, better, but gooder feels righter!
I had a good laugh at this thread. Thank you, as I needed cheering up.
This was just so feel good! Honestly one of my favorite BP posts ever.
Thank you so much BP. I really, really needed something positive right now.
As a toker, it nearly killed me to click the green arrow as it was on 420, but this needs as many up arrows as it can get! I had to wade through FAR too many AITA type posts to get here.
Thanks for this ....it's old but it helped me smile and I haven't smiled in a bit been dealing with a lot
I hope things get better for you, Francine. Be kind to yourself if you can.
Load More Replies...I'd had a good day anyway but this whole thread made it even gooder. Yes, I know, better, but gooder feels righter!
