Logic Left The Building: 50 Kid Fails That Left Parents In Tears Of Laughter, Mostly (New Pics)
Interview With ExpertRaising kids can be a trip. The journey is filled with laughter, tears, and at times, embarrassment. They have no filter. None whatsoever. Little humans will say or do whatever’s on their minds, totally unaware of the impact or consequences. There's no such thing as a tattered reputation as far as they're concerned.
Sometimes their thoughts and actions are random, hilarious, or confusing. Other times, they’re just dumb. We forgive them because they’re still developing. But parents don’t always forget. In fact, some make sure their children’s weird antics are forever immortalized, by sharing them online for all the world to see.
People have been sharing the completely clueless things that kids have said or done. And while some are ridiculously cringe, we can’t help but laugh. Bored Panda has put together a cute list of our favorite ones, for when you need to feel better about your own stupid moments. Don’t forget to upvote the ones that you love. We also had a fun and nostalgic chat with author Jules Torti about her own dumb and questionable childhood memories. Torti has written several insightful and humorous books, including "Been There, Ate That: A Candy-coated Childhood."
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Duty Is Duty
One time I hit my softball coach in the nuts when I was on deck. I remember he had a LOT of change in his pocket because it sounded like I hit the liberty bell
Hey, instinct can save a child's life. That man survived and I hope he understood. I would have! 🦺
And it was on that day that the security guard decided to not ever have kids. well, actually, it wasn't a decision. from that day forward, it was impossible for his nuts to function
Jules Torti is excited when Bored Panda reaches out to her. The author loves talking and writing about all things nostalgia and growing up. Torti doesn't hesitate to tell us her childhood revolved around questionable things. Even though, like many of us, she didn't consider them dumb at the time.
"I thought I was quite clever when I avoided returning overdue library books and instead chose to bury them down by the pond behind our house," Torti recalls. "And when my brother and I bounced around the pink insulation batts when my parents were renovating the basement, we didn't realize there was anything dumb about it. When our eyes were pinker than the insulation, and we felt like we'd been rolled around in poison ivy, we were politely informed of our dumbness and didn't take much interest in playing in fiberglass again!"
"This was a time period where common sense did not prevail," continues the author. "I mean, we used to throw the biggest rocks we could find onto the pond's surface to test the ice readiness. If the rock didn't go through, clearly, it was safe enough for us to play hockey. We would also [pee] inside our snowsuits when tobogganing to avoid having to go back inside the house and unzipping everything. We thought that was a smart alternative until the hot and wet itch set in."
A Solid Career Choice If You Asked Me
I’m going with lime. Imagine all the margaritas I can visit!
Load More Replies...Undereducation is the reason people voted for him.
Load More Replies...My younger one (4 yr. old at the time) once told a babysitter that she used to be a puppy when she was little.
I saw a reddit post two days ago about a guy learning that his parents were swingers and someone on the comments mention pineapples as a sign for swingers. Then I remembered the How I Met Your Mother episode where Ted woke up drunk with a girl in his bed and a pineapple in his night stand and everyone was wondering where he got the pineapple... now I think I know.
Load More Replies...I dreamt one time that my daughter was a half a grapefruit. I even remember checking on her in her classroom and seeing this half a grapefruit sitting between a couple of kids at a desk.
Par for the course, people are allowed to identify as anything. At least a pineapple is delicious.
Torti recalls doing loads of dumb sh*it with her hair as a kid. "My sister and I gave each other several not-so-flattering haircuts all the time," she tells us. "We lived in the country, so we were responsible for creating our own entertainment, which oddly involved scissors and each other's bangs (well, when they existed to cut off again)."
"When we had no hair of our own to trim, we turned to the cat," remembers Torti. "Poor Moker, our grey Persian---she was often whisker-less, and I regret that, but I'm sure my sister deserved the aggressive clippings and bubblegum in her hair. I'm surprised Kiley and I were allowed to have hair at all---the greatest sibling revenge was sticking a wad of Hubba Bubba on the back of her head. Or pine sap in a pinch. We were always halfway up a tree in our yard and if one was annoyed with the other the big brain-like balls of sap on the trunks were the perfect weapon."
"I'm sure she regrets that I'm a writer and love to tell the story of when she ate all of my grandmother's ex-lax," laughed the author. "Oh, and that time she ate Play-Doh. Now, there's a visual!"
Wholesome Family Time
When I was around 4 and went out with my family I thought someone has in our house while we were out cause the tv wasn't playing the show I was watching when we left.
I used to believe that everyone in Florida, except for the people who worked for the theme parks and stores, was on vacation, like me and my family 😆 I was probably 5 or 6 at the time. 🏰
Sadly Michael Jackson's "family time" often involved other people's kids.
I believed this until I was 35 years old. Starting when I was 4 or 5, my mom would set my hair in pin curls on Sundays when I washed my hair. I thought I was so beautiful on Mondays and Tuesdays 'cuz my hair was wavy and pretty. Mom told me not to cry at all because the damp of the tears would take the curl out of my hair. I thought this was true 'til a friend laughed when I told her.
Regardless of what generation they grow up in, children will probably always continue to do silly things. But as times change, perhaps the definition of "dumb" will, too. Torti says that the kids of today are totally different from when she grew up.
"I think kids nowadays are non-believers in a lot of things beyond Santa---like what their parents say or teachers teach," Torti tells Bored Panda. "We only had five TV channels growing up, no computer and one rotary dial phone. We relied on our imaginations and silliness because we didn't have cell phones, Netflix, Facebook and hovering parents."
The author adds that nowadays, there's a big shift in kids modeling their parents anxieties. "Whether it's politics, the pandemic, weight gain or social media. This kind of stuff never entered our mindset because our parents never discussed such things or their nervousness about anything."
So You Scheduled That Piper Playdate, Right?
they need to! an interspecies bond is one of the most wholesome kinds
Load More Replies...Good kid pets far better than people lol she will go far you ilittle one
I see what you did there and it’s glorious 😂
Load More Replies...Smart girl. Cats are more intuitive than toddlers. (Provided their parents DIDN'T squash the innate human trait. She's destined to be a 'crazy' cat lady. 😆
Lost My Kid In Target. Found Him Here
NO! go find the nearest staff member or Police Officer. For all you know, the nearest person could be dodgy as Hêll.
Load More Replies...This kid is going to be incredible at those "Hidden in plain sight" challenges
I saw a video where the parents tied a balloon to the kid's backpack. No problem finding them then.
My dad tied a balloon to my wrist when I was around 3 or 4 at the zoo. They lost me anyway. When I was found they asked me what happened to the balloon and I calmly replied that I had untied it.
Load More Replies...He Should Have Checked Behind The TV Too
when I was young, I thought that the singers on the radio , were in the studio Silly huh?
One little girl told me that everyone knew ghosts existed because they were the invisible people you could hear laughing on TV shows. She likely overheard adults talking about how the "canned" laughter in some shows was recorded so many years ago that some of people in the recording are dead, and that's how her 5-year-old mind interpreted it 😂
I remember looking behind my parents' old Hi-Fi to try and see if the musicians were back there.
As adults, we can learn a lot from children. They’re carefree, they laugh a lot, they’re curious, and they’re resilient. Us grown-ups tend to take life really seriously, and as far as kids are concerned—we should lighten up.
The Western Australian government released a sweet and insightful report in 2022 titled “What can adults learn from children?” The office of the Commissioner for Children and Young People had polled over a thousand young people from age 8 up and received some cute and enlightening responses.
“Many children and young people want adults to listen to what they have to say and express their frustration in not being heard,” said Western Australia Commissioner Jacqueline McGowan-Jones. “A large number also mentioned that adults could learn from children how to be more creative and have fun.”
While there’s no denying kids can say or do some dumb sh*t, they are by no means not smart. In the report, a number of children said that adults underestimate their intelligence. "[We] are not as dumb as they think," was one boy's simple answer when asked what adults can learn from children.
In one particularly cute response, another youngster said, “Adults learn stuff from children every day – once when I was 2 years old, my mum thought there were only 10 dinosaurs, but I told her there were more than 400 dinosaurs. She was astonished.”
“Just remember, children are smart, too,” added the little Einstein.
Close Enough
Her version, she was having the argument with her daughter.
Load More Replies...When my wife and I were getting our marriage license there was a woman named syphilis. I asked her about it and she said her mom was an immigrant and didn't know English and she saw it in a newspaper and thought it sounded pretty.
My boss said his youngest came back from preschool and said his new friend was named Potato. Strangely, his name was actually Mateo.
Solid Plan
I got a dog by tying a stuffed animal to a leash and dragging it around the neighborhood. I was 10. Humiliate your family by being pathetic enough and you will get what you want.
There was already a dog in the house when I was born, thankfully. He was a malamute and my parents have said they pretty much thought he considered me *his* child.
Load More Replies...I used to do this, because I was told not to.. i cant recognice faces and if it move fast enough its just a blurr. Also have stigmatism. So, if you have a curious child with a defiant streak, tell them WHY you dont want them doing it 😂😅
Give him a few years and there'll be something else he does in an attempt to make himself go blind ;-) Bless the chaotic mind of the pre-teen and teen!
Now that's problem solving! Hope he didn't damage his eyes. Reminds me of when I was a kid, in bed for the night, not sleepy, now what? I'd hold my arm up in the air, thinking if my arm got tired enough, I would fall asleep! :D
What did trump want while he was looking directly into the sun during an eclipse?
What does anything on this post have to do with Trump? You're acting like one of the kids on this list.
Load More Replies...How Could You?
I'm a teacher at the same school my teenager attends. He games online with his friends. He mutes every time so they won't hear me.. Bruh seriously I have your friends in class. They know you have a mom.
Wtf is that? Mine acts mortified if I call her for dinner. And she went absolutely nuclear the time I answered her phone. Excuse me, I am not the rude one to tell someone to stop calling (10th time in a row) while my daughter was taking a nap. Yeah having parents is extremely embarrassing nowadays
To be fair i wouldn't want my parents answering my calls but ive never met anyone embarrassed bt their parents.. existing
Load More Replies...When my son was 12 I was driving him somewhere when, all of a sudden he yelled"duck!" and I asked him why and he said his friends were walking down the street and he didn't want them to know he gad a mother...I WAS DRIVING!!!!......got him back the next day though when I was once again driving him and I yelled "duck" and he asked why..I told him my friends were walking down the street and I didn't want them to know I had a son lol...payback, well, you know the rest
Let him experience what it is like not have Mom. No meals. No rides to school etc.
No clean clothes? Rides to school could be good or bad, then Mom gets in trouble I guess.
Load More Replies...ha! Just get on the next Zoom and loudly say, "Hey, get back in the basement and stop eating our food!" Then he can say he has his own "basement apartment". BUT you get to actually keep him down there til he realizes that parents are AWESOME, and they let you use their toilet paper!
Many of the children surveyed felt that grown-ups need to loosen up. "Have fun and stop working all day and writing emails," suggested one child. And I'd have to admit, I'm guilty as charged.
Even experts agree that adults need to take a leaf out of children's books when it comes to having fun, being silly, and laughing more. “Just because parenting is a serious business is no reason to be serious about it all the time," said Shannon Bennett, assistant professor of psychology at Weill Cornell Medicine.
"Taking time for a moment of levity with your child during your daily routine means you’re making it a priority. You’re saying, ‘We enjoy you. You’re important. You’re loved.’”
Yay! Snacks
OMG!! I might try this. Daddy I'm hungry. Cool I'm making lunch. I'm not hungry for lunch.
well snacks are a lot better than dinner imo. if you gave me broccoli and told me it was a snack id probably eat it
When my friend's daughter was picky with food, the friend said one day, we're going to have a picnic. So she did easy-to-pick-up picnic food on plastic plates and it all got eaten.
Good thinkin' Lincoln. Sadly, bribery works. But hey, you didn't stretch the truth far.
Stupid But Wholesome
it has been 8 years now. I hope you tell him before he moves out some day
But not a moment before. Family brush time sounds like a win.
Load More Replies...One day he'll go to camp with the scouts or similar, I hope he gets on O.K.
I had to hear it at some point, Ray. Thank you for bearing with me, it feels like part of growing up that I somehow missed out, but now I'm complete.
Load More Replies...The Transformation Is Beginning
A bit like when I was 8 and wanted to be either an Archaeologist or a Unicorn... Still not a unicorn
But you are an archeologist? That's cool!. Also I bet that hooves make almost all of archeology very difficult.
Load More Replies...My kid had to swallow radioactive material for a GI study. He was mad for DAYS that he didn't turn into the hulk
Yeah this is weird. Maybe it was a specific fruit yogurt and that’s what the actual allergy stems from.
Load More Replies...Bennett told the Washington Post that kids are drawn to people who can be funny. In order to connect with them, we adults need to lighten up.
“So many of our days as parents can be bogged down with just getting from task A to task B," she explained. "Laughing can be cathartic and release dopamine and other feel-good chemicals in the brain. The key is the shared experience of joy. Making room for fun can help your children become the people they were meant to be.”
That Was Unexpected
That's me, my morning mum look is "dragged through a hedge backwards". By the afternoon pick up I've about pulled myself together!
Load More Replies...Bella n lady bug will you to kiddos please go elsewhere your both pathetic and exhausting now please grow up
Tell him that if she likes the pretty Mom more then he has to say so at every opportunity!
My pussy cat running around being cute vs my pussy cat meowing for a SOLID five hours!!!
My Young Nieces Refuse To Eat Tomatoes, But Can't Get Enough Of These "Flower Fruit" (Dark Cherry Tomatoes) That I Grow
In fairness to her home grown tomatoes tastes nothing like supermarket ones.
That they don’t not in the least shop ones are tasteless I mean they will do but homegrown are far far better right
Load More Replies...Those are beautiful! Tomatoes? I literally thought I was looking at nectarines!
We had a small garden and the cherry tomatos never seemed to produce much...til we found out that the Westie dog was eating them
For kids, sometimes it's just the sound of the name of the food. My kids ate green trees and white trees, but when a guest called the veg "broccoli" and "cauliflower", they both said, "Yuck!" So I waited awhile before I served either of the 'trees' again, and they'd forgotten the proper names.
Turn Your Back For 30 Seconds
As someone who tried this exact same feat at University, I can safely say, kid fits better than I did.
Omg you didn’t lmao what where you drinking 😂need to see the pics lol 😂
Load More Replies...I got a call from a Primary School once asking if we would replace one of our chairs FOC - when I asked why, I was told it wasn't a problem with the chair it was the fact that they were now one short due to a kid trying to slide out the back of it, getting stuck and them having to call the fire service to cut him out. After we all had a good laugh we sent them a chair for free
Note to self stop drinking coffee while reading these 🤣🙈coffee n iPads do not mix omg to funny this one
Many of us would be lying if we said we didn't do at least one dumb thing when we were little. Heck, some of us still haven’t learned and could take part in the "Adults Doing Dumb Sh*t Olympics". If there ever were to be such a thing. As children, we often knew no better. We were exploring, learning, and feeding our curiosity.
Psychologist, author, and instructor Christopher Thurber once shared a memory that is literally seared into his being. "When I was four, I fell in love with Hot Wheels toy cars. My favorite was a drag racer with its own parachute. The chute clipped to the underside of the car with a pair of wire hooks... It was really cool," he wrote.
I Think She Hates School
I had a similar conversation with my daughter. But I said, don't worry, because you're new family will still need to take you to school.
And the good thing is, she won't have to wait until after school to go visit.
I Hope It Was Elvis
3 Year Old Daughter Said Close Your Eyes I Have A Cool Sticker For You. This Was The Cool Sticker When I Opened My Eyes
just took a hit from my joint, and exploded into coughing!!! too funny!
My daughter called those 'flat pillows' when she was a baby. Now, she calls them 'the devil's pillow'
I REALLY literally laughed out loud when I saw the photo after reading the "sticker story"!
I remember my daughter telling me she'd put "aeroplane stickers" on the bathroom wall 🤦
First one on this list that actually made me spontaneously laugh out loud 🤣
"I noticed one day that the wire hooks resembled an electrical plug," continued Thurber. "And so I did the logical thing for a four-year-old: I inserted those hooks into an outlet."
I think the majority of us can guess what happened next. Because we are adults, not 4-year-olds, we've learned that it's never a good idea to stick a metal anything into an electrical socket.
Hide And Seek Champ?
Teaching your small children hide and seek is one of the joys of parenthood not often talked about. My son is either master ninja level or I find him distracted as he forgot we were playing. While my daughter always leaves her legs poking out and giggles like a hyena. It is beautiful.
I thought this post was about kids. Why do you show a picture of a pole?
Nah, the champ was my older one when she was around 8 or 9. Dad had taken the kids to the park and lost sight of her. She was wearing a pair of kids camo pants and an old olive drab shirt left over from my husband's miltary service. He started getting nervous and was calling her name. What gave her away was her giggles. She was standing just a couple feet away, right up against a tree trunk. Yep, camoflauge works.
Who am I supposed to be looking for? there's no-one in this picture! /j
She thought she found the lottery spot...stay hidden and see everything
Not The Smartest Kid
As a toddler, my brother once told our mother, “Go away, Mom.” I never did find out what he wanted to do!
Glad This Didn’t Exist When I Was A Kid
i instead had a dad who started building and programming since he was a kid. he knew what i did.
AGREED. I'm an OG (72). My TV died, replaced it only to learn, all TVs are smart. SMFH. I have to go back to school to figure the b*tch out. All I want is simple broadcast TV, you know, TV guide 'stylee'. Users guide, 170 pages... YEESH!
"Pop! The thin wires vaporized in a flash, turning my fingers black and red," wrote Thurber. "I must have yelped, but I don’t remember that part. I do remember my mother calling from the kitchen... By the time I heard her footsteps running down the hall, I had already dashed into the bathroom to scrub the discoloration from my wounded extremity. But burns don’t wash off."
My Daughter Got Her Head Stuck In The Door. She Was The One Holding The Door Closed
She is 15 now and still stuck there. No one has the heart to tell her to let go.
my kid sometimes looks for things that are in his hand. i dont always tell him right away.
This Photo My Kid’s Daycare Sent Us Of Him Helping Them Bake A Cake
Not really. This kid is at least trying to help.
Load More Replies...The recipe said: put the paper cup on your forehead and pour on the table.
This one's right up there with hide and seek, and head 'stuck' in the cupboard.
This Is My Son. Hiding. In A Mesh, Very See Through Laundry Hamper. All While Whispering "Hide, Hide, Hide" To Himself
"Gee this basket seems dirty and needs to be washed" (picks it up)
Playing hide and seek with my kids was the best at this age. I would always let them find me first so I could walk around with the seeker going. "I don't know, maybe your sister is under that napkin." And they would pickup the napkin to check. "Maybe she's on the ceiling", and up they'd look. "Did you check in your shoes?" and yep, they'd take off their shoes to check. Too much fun
my teenage son once hid in a closet, WITH HIS EYES CLOSED, because he was skipping school & I came home unexpectedly. No idea what made me check that closet, but there he was, acting like I couldn't see him BECAUSE HIS EYES WERE CLOSED. Took everything I had not to laugh at the absurdity & stay in pissed-off mom mode! He has yet to live it down almost 30 yrs later
I can barely take anymore 'adorable-ness'! Thank you parents. 👏🏼👏🏼
In loud voice: "Oh, I wonder if that blue t-shirt & the shorts are dirty, and there's something else in this basket as well, might need to get that out. . ." (Wait for reaction.)
In his essay on the American Camp Association site, Thurber says all young kids do stupid things, adding that "doing dumb stuff teaches something". The expert urges adults to take it easy on children when they make small, stupid mistakes.
"When kids do something asinine, sigh quickly," he suggests. "Then welcome the lessons attached to that experience. You can express concern, even anger. You can even punish from time to time. But let your dominant approach to young people’s development be to embrace the hidden treasure of dumb stuff."
What An Idea To Slow Down Others
It's not common knowledge? Some of you are only children and it SHOWS.
I'm an only child raising 3 children of my own. Sibling dynamics are WILD. Violence, theft, name calling, irritating each other purely for entertainment, but heaven forbid they are separated, suddenly they are terribly lonely and can't live without each other.
Load More Replies...I'm going to hell for laughing as hard as I did reading this... side note, I know that sound too!
...followed by a sound like two giant metal rattlesnakes headbutted each other at 50 mph.
Load More Replies...Literally The Same Version Of Each Other
My classmates from elementary school were identical twins. They liked to pretend to be each other. They always got mad when no one in our class fell for it. We saw them almost every day, so telling them apart was easy :D
Please Tell Me You Said, "Yes."
But... gnocchi is not a noodle. it's a dumpling.
Load More Replies...I'm Italian. My husband isn't. When we first got together years ago, he was an OTR trucker and I would cook up a storm for the day he came home. He asked me to make spaghetti one time so I did. I asked how it was and he said it was really good, but maybe next time could I use shells or elbows. I said of course, but if he wanted that why did he ask for spaghetti? He said that all pasta is spaghetti. I busted up laughing and was like, 'not to an Italian it isn't!'
I really hate when grow a.s.s adults can't call kids properly. What's wrong with them? Don't kids deserve the same respect as any other human being just because they are... kids?
this gives Starfire. 'she's not my girlfriend!' "...I am not your friend? *GASP* I AM NOT A GIRL?!?!"
Meanwhile My Dog Is Actually 14 And Doesn't Want To Hang Out With Me
Come on. The kid THOUGHT the pup would not want to hang and play. That's not what happened and why analyze the dog years thing? It's just a kid's perspective at the time. Jeepers. It's cute and I'm sure they had many more years to fun and friendship. 🐶💕
My Boyfriend Is A Teacher And Just Sent Me This
Fun fact: I'm from Buffalo,NY and we just call them wings. Lol Only people outside of Buffalo call them "Buffalo Wings". Its like a tell sometimes. I was laughing with my friend who is from Philly and he immediately asked me, "Oh, you mean like cheese steaks?" And I said " What? Philly Cheese steaks?" He just went 😑. Took me a few sec but when I got it, it was a pivitol moment. 😆
I'm in Rochester and we just call them wings too- they're buff wings specifically if they have buffalo sauce on them (Rochester is like an hour away from Buffalo)
Load More Replies...My neices 12 and 9 don't believe burgers are made from cow meat. Beyond meat commercials have fooled them into believing all burgers every where are Beyond meat not cow meat. I gave up trying to convince them, they can figure that one out for themselves.
The first time I had a hush puppy I loved it but tried not to cry because I thought they had puppies in them.
Warning if you come to the UK; when I grew up, Hush Puppies were shoes!
Load More Replies...Honestly I don't think this is in the slightest bit unreasonable. Had they ever seen a buffalo? It's a stupid name for them anyway.
Another old joke. What's the difference between a buffalo and a bison? Answer: Have you ever tried washing your hands in a buffalo?
Load More Replies...Oh, Buffalo wings, won't you come out tonight? Come out tonight? Come out tonight?
At Least He’s Still Getting Use Out Of Them
when my brother was one-and-a-half, we randomly had some cake mix around so my mom and I made a cake and we decided when my brother woke up from his nap to gaslight him into thinking it was his birthday (being four, I thought this was the funniest prank, and I loved it) one of the things we did was wrap some of his favorite toys in gift wrap. he was so absolutely thrilled to open them lmao
He Went Outside And Everything To Collect That Damn Leaf For Me. Love The Dedication
They do sound the same, and thankfully your kid seems healthy enough not to be familiar with pharmaceutical brand names. I wouldn't know what an Aleve was either. But I would know if you said paracetamol, aspirin or ibuprofen that it was medicine.
It’s a USA or Canadian thing like our uk paracetamol etc
Load More Replies...idk. I would never have asked my kid at nine to get into the medicine cabinet and bring me anything. Water-sure. But at that age I wouldn't think they should be messing with any medications. I meant the fact the kid doesn't even know what an Aleve is, seems to be a good indication that they aren't old enough.
My kids bought me a small plush lion for my birthday. It was because they heard me say I would like a 'lie in'.
Letting a 9 year old do that ?? So he can do it for himself now ?
My 7 Year Old Son's Brilliant Way To Never Lose The Only Key He Has For This Lock
Just as well those locks can be picked easily and even pulled apart.
According to the lock picking lawyer on Youtube, every lock is easily picked.
Load More Replies...I Forged This Letter To My Mom Pretending To Be My Fourth Grade Teacher, An Absolute Classic
Wonder why it didn’t work, looks legit to me!
Practice makes perfect! I made good money at secondary school by forging signatures and notes. It was the only thing I had going for me, really.
I don't think the handwriting was the glaring problem with this note.
Load More Replies...I forged my mum's signature on sick notes to get out of gym all through secondary school. I got away with it cuz the only time the PE teacher challenged one of my sick notes, it was a genuine one and when she phoned my mum, mum gave her a blasting for not believing me. 🤣
Not sure how it works outside of the US, but in the US when a student turns 18 and becomes a legal adult, they can write their own excuse notes when they miss school. When I found that out I was thrilled...until I realized that, having skipped a grade, I would graduate just after turning 17 and would never be able to avail myself of such power.
You're dating yourself my friend, and so am I, lol. Sweathogs forever 😊
Load More Replies...As a fellow Caroline I completely agree (even though im already in high school)
That Sounds Paneful
Those were the days! I remember walking home from a building site (yes, we played on those on the 80s) with a spade still sticking in the back of my leg. I had to hobble along and hold the spade at the same time! It was a good 400 metres.
Those where the days lol I’m 60 so was out in the 70,s on the farm dawn till dusk when u only came back in if you where dead 😂😂
Load More Replies...My neice used to yell and cry out the window when she was sent to her room. Her parents then made her sit on the stairs.
One of my cousins was put upstairs at my aunt's house for misbehaving and being summer, we were all outside at the picnic table and she continued her tirade from the open bedroom window.
That is what a crying pillow is for, you put your face in it to smother the noise
You Tell Me Buddy
Any Walmart employee could tell you that the company is quite disinclined to provide health care.
Even if this were true, Walmart would be the last place I'd take them.
I Didn’t Know People Actually Did This
We appreciate you took the time to make a photo instead of helping the poor child
Oh please. 2 seconds for a photo that will still be amusing in 30yrs and the kid learned a life lesson. Hope you don't get vertigo from up on that high horse Simon Chen.
Load More Replies...Ladybug is tired. Chasing Bella through an entire thread is exhausting. So Ladybug morphed into a beautiful Karen. Then flew far, far away, where she feasted on manners and kindness and STFU nectar. Then she gently closed her eyes and had a nap.
You seriously have never actually seen/tried this?? My god, it was a right of passage on every ski lift I have ever been on... Not to mention recess...
oh good i'm nod the only one who did this on the chairlifts.
Load More Replies..."And then the doctor said that my nose wouldn't bleed so much if I stopped putting crayons up there!"
Load More Replies...My daughter did that twice. Twice. In the same winter. On the same pole. Some lessons are hard to learn for the curious mind.
I did it in grade one. Principal came to “un-stick” me with a lighter. I was so worried about him burning me I jerked myself loose. Bled a bit but NEVER did it again! 🤣
My Partner Teaches Primary School. She Sent Me This Gem Today
Bad instructions. It's "Draw an angle with a smaller measure." The sides of an angle all have the same length - infinitely long because they are rays.
To be fair, it is highly unlikely this was the first lesson on angles. The instructions are perfectly clear if it has been explained before. The angel, being the point where the lines meet is very early on in the explanation in most syllabus, therefore I would take your instructions to be over complicated. Although, as you say measure rather than measurement, I suspect we come from different countries and may have slightly different interpretations. I definitely know in my class your instructions would really confuse the students while (almost) all would be happy with 'smaller angel '.
Load More Replies...My Children Can't Be Trusted To Lie And I'm Okay With That
Reminds me of the restaurant that let under fives and military eat free on July 4. Woman says to her six year old “you know what to do”. Kid tells server “I’m in the Marines “
I did something similar once. Mom was trying to get out of some social thing and told someone that she won't be able to go with them that afternoon, she had important errands to run. And I just pulled on her coat and very helpfully reminded her that she told me earlier she was free all afternoon. I thought that she forgot, I did not yet comprehend that adults lied sometimes.
1967. Went to a buffet restaurant with family, including gerandparents. Lower rate for age 6 and under. Waitress asked how old I was and I proudly said 6. But as she was getting drink orders, I thought about it and realized I was 7, which I announced out loud. Grandpop said I should pay the difference. he was always a putz anyway but I never forgot that.
You have to tell them ahead of time & say that the money you save will be spent on a treat.
And that makes it OK to tell a lie, does it? Seems harmless but kids don't know where to draw the line.
Load More Replies...I'm more than a little upset; she s teaching your child to lie. When she catches him in a lie she will be a gigantic hypocrite if she punishes him.
I never told my children about the mythological children's characters. Even as a child I found it weird and creepy that these beings would enter the protected space of my home/bedroom to leave (only!) children 'gifts' of whatever sort. My kids believed in them anyway because they went to public school where these things are celebrated and encouraged.
Load More Replies...Asked My Nephew To Line Up The Shoes While Cleaning Up
Didn't specify against the wall. Will be giving clearer instructions next time.
What did he do with their other halves? I only see one half of each pair??? Are they pirates?
this is my new favorite way to organize shoes. (i didn't have a favorite before but now i do)
Match the pairs and line them up against the wall. All on the floor. Did I cover everything?
Main Question Is What Did You Do With The Removed Pieces
Swiss cheese When the process is finished, it's cooled down and the holes — or “eyes” as they're called in the industry — are solidified. While other countries make cheeses with similar flavor profiles like Fontina and Gruyère, it can't be considered Swiss cheese unless it has the properly formed eyes - so technically he’s right
Emmental and Appenzell have holes, but Gruyère (a Swiss cheese) does not, like many other Swiss cheeses. US labelling may be different, but Gruyère *has* to be Swiss to be called Gruyère. The holes in cheeses are made because of impurities in the process. Any holes in Gruyère mean that it’s technically not allowed to use that name.
Load More Replies...I'm not a fan of Swiss cheese either. I do eat the cheese, but I make sure to leave the holes on my plate.
Once upon a time, eons ago, my grandkids wanted apples. They asked to have them peeled. Mon said No, I looked at the two and peeled their apples. If Moms won't do it, Memas will.
As the sampler says, "If Mother says no ask Grandmother."
Load More Replies...Whatever you do, don’t look up the video of Mickey mouse putting holes in the swiss cheese!!!
When I was a kid I asked my beloved grandfather how they put the holes into the Swiss cheese. — He said, “Ball bearings.” — I thought about it and said, “Well, then, how do they get them out?” I asked quite seriously because I thought he was the smartest man in the world and knew everything there was to know. He started laughing and I knew he was kidding. I don’t remember if he explained the actual process or not. My mother related the story many times and I do have memories of picturing silver balls inside cheese and trying to figure out how they could possibly get them out of the cheese without leaving marks. I’m so happy that there was actually an opportunity to share the story here!
Perfect Description
Americans will use anything to avoid the metric system... except when measuring ammunition...which is odd.
All Fun And Games Until They Actually Bring Out A Cat
A friend of my parents' who was an electrician refused to eat at a Chinese restaurant near us cause he swore he saw cats in the freezer.
Not A Surprise Prank
Yep. Me, too. I would also give the most dramatic reaction possible so he would get the maximum enjoyment from it. We are only kids for a very short while. Give them as much joy as you can...real life will be there for them faster than we like.
Load More Replies...I must have had a deprived childhood. I never did this. I never heard anyone say they got pranked, or that they pranked anyone else. I never saw anyone pranked, except on TV.
Cakey Will Always Be A Part Of Him
You are doing a great job, your son has empathy at such a young age. Most adults never get that far. Keep up the good work
(There's no reply option under Kalikima to respond) However, I noticed that the kid's cheeks are flushed which often happens after a bout of crying. The parent probably took the photo after his initial outburst.
Load More Replies...He’s Five By The Way
I caught mine trying to run random numbers into the credit card payment page on Amazon. Had to explain to a 6 year old what fraud is
Make sure he can't get to the copier anymore. With the new administration he could end up doing hard time in Gitmo
And This Is Why We Never Use Tin Foil Around Our Food And Put It In The Microwave
But not before making sure the house isn't burning down, I assume.
Load More Replies...I, too, did something similar, as a child. My dad asked me to reheat a burger from Wendy's. Well back in the day, Wendy's wrapped their sandwiches in foiled lined paper. About 3 seconds after pressing start on the microwave, to reheat the burger, I noticed that it was sparking and immediately opened the door. My parents should be grateful, that at 6, I knew enough that the microwave shouldn't have had a lightning storm inside it.
OMG. A Radiologist did that at work one morning. I was smelling something and was tracking it down and ended up in Ultrasound. Carol wanted to warm up a biscuit she had gotten on her way to work, foil and waxed paper. She wasn't allowed to touch the microwave after that. This freaking Dr was around 60 at the time.
Kids Are Just The Best, Aren't They?
One Of The Stupidest Things I've Ever Seen A Kid Do, And It's My Kid
I mean, experimentation like this is science for kids. It's how they understand the world - by doing things that look absolutely nuts to us! I admire his courage and curiosity!
And this is a harmless one. It could definitely be worse 😂
Load More Replies...Technically tomatoes are fruit and ketchup is full of sugar, so jam?
Load More Replies...So, this must be my Grandpa, who put ketchup on everything. Once he even put it in his coffee (and drank it!) just to make my grandma mad. He also put salt on his watermelon, which I did not and do not care for, but that didn't stop him from offering it to me when he knew I'd forgotten, and watched me make faces while I tried not to say anything negative (saying 'yuck' was not allowed in Grandma's presence).
but salt is known to enhance the flavor if it's done sparingly - I've added it to watermelon on occasion
Load More Replies...When my oldest was about 3, they liked to dip tortilla chips in strawberry yogurt 🤷♀️
Why ? If he likes it let him do it. Take your judgement elsewhere
Load More Replies...don't be a food snob. People have different tastes. What would he think if you gave him caviar or raw oysters. He probably wouldn't say stupidest thing, but he would wonder why you would eat something so disgusting. This also goes for all you a**holes who rag on people because they like their food cooked more or less than you do. Nobody made you food dictator
My Daughter’s Hide And Seek Spots Are Improving?
FFS bored panda ,get the right image. All I can see here is a transparent box , nothing related to hide and seek at all
Mine was a master at hide and seek. I almost called the cops once. That game is extremely unsettling to play with your own children
Please tell me, she ended up falling asleep, in her super covert hiding spot?
This Is How My 2 Year Old Granddaughter Sits Taking Ornaments Off The Tree, Thinking No One Can See Her
I used to do that. But they were little people and animal ornaments of course I needed to play with them
My Five Year Old Daughter Cut Holes In Her Socks Just In Case Her Feet Get Hot
She has different socks for that. Warmer ones. Made warmer by gluing the spare bits of summer socks on
Load More Replies...Since people go out and pay money for pre-ripped jeans, I'd say we have a marketing prodigy here.
Told My Son That He Had To Eat Half Of His Hot Dog Before We Could Watch A Movie
Have to applaud his efforts and ability to follow instructions
As your kid I would prefer to never watch a movie again and maybe call CPS. THIS "FOOD" IS A CRIME, even for US standards. Looks like typical US school lunch.
Kids Will Believe Anything They Are Told
It might have been a misinterpretation of "You want a tattoo and a motorbike? Over my dead body!"
Load More Replies...Sounds like my friend's mum. My friend was told as a child that she shouldn't scream while playing outside cuz the gypsies who kidnap children find them by following the sound of children screaming. 🫣 Traumatising children was fine in the 80s.
Not just parents, seemed like all the adults were in on it. Anyone go in to the hall and excitedly watch them wheel out the TV on the tripod, only to watch in horror as a child's head melted because they stood too close to a rail line or flew a kite? Or those bike safety things where the message was adults are trying to kill you. Traumatising kids in the 80's was taken to serious levels.
Load More Replies...My Daughter Trying To Hide When She's Supposed To Be In Bed
There's so many pictures without people in this list. Smh.
Load More Replies...There is a big bump in the rug. I better jump on it to see it I can make it smaller.
She is probably going to fall asleep right there and outsmart herself.
Short Term Memory Problems Lead To Lifetime Of Disappointments
This Is So Sweet And So Stupid
My ID expired in 2016. Passport expired in 2023. Before I finally gave up and applied for a new one, I learnt there's an ID app. I'll never get a plastic ID.
what if your phone's stolen, or device is hacked? (genuine question)
Load More Replies...Kids Are Too Funny
Absolutely! I will definitely be using this one. Probably today.
Load More Replies...Amazon Baby
I Used To Tell My Mom My Entire Kindergarten Class Shared A Single Apple
I'm A Vegetarian
A 7yo can be forgiven for this. Sadly, there are grown@$$ adults who are that daft.
I see no conflict here. Vegetarian does not equal vegan, and some vegetarians are perfectly fine eating fish or birds.
Then they are not vegetarian, they are flexitarian or omnivores.
Load More Replies...How To Put In AirPods, By My 2 Year Old
Wait It’s Not The Same?
I wonder if BP will censor urine. Guess not.
Load More Replies...One time i said "I wish this had an ejaculation seat" instead of "ejection seat." Still mortified
Once we took a friend of mine on holiday - I think we were 14- it was a long coach journey and we spent the first few hours doing our homework (we were geeky) which was a biology project. Adults all around were stifling giggles untill my dad came over to tell us the word we wanted was 'organism'. Yes, we had been innocently been chatting about 'orgasms' with zero idea
Load More Replies...Gamer Rage
First he was charged, then discharged.
Load More Replies...When I was 6 years old I was in hospital because I had to have my tonsils out. One day they gave me something that made me sleepy. Half woke to find out that I was being wheeled down a corridor, I looked and asked where we were.going, and was told to the theatre. I ask what we were going to see. Thought I was going to see and play or a flim
Well, tbf, I was probably in my mid- late teens before I learned that there were other places called the theatre, that have nothing to do with entertainment.
Load More Replies...He Immediately Regrets Decision
Kid Doesn't Like Apples But Eats Them If They Are Like McDonald's Fries
Good lord. You're setting yourself up for a lot of work with this one.
My thoughts exactly lol he’s gonna be bloody hard work 🙈
Load More Replies...That's dedication. Mine likes orange slices in the shape of a flower on a plate but that's not so difficult
Decided To Try To Fit Between The Sliding Door And The Screen
Again, kid science in action! I have a hypothesis, now I will test it. Behold! It seems I was, again, wrong.
Kids Are Masters Of Pattern Recognition
My 3YO boy (with the appetite of a Clydesdale) does this. "OK, you can have a little bit of ice cream with your dessert. But just a little bit." "No! I want much ice cream! Much!"
Send the kid to bed early, and tell him it's so he'll get too much sleep.
Kid Thought The Expiration Date On Milk Was 1573
What a stupid, national-only and lazy date format. As a German I would be worried, too. Most companies are just lazy bitches.
I Was A Bit Stupid As A Child
Found Out Why My Dog Is Sick
My wife was waiting at the vet to get our dog checked out for stomach problems that started this weekend. As she’s there she gets this note from my 3 year old son’s daycare. Apparently he was feeling guilty.
If this story is true it must be a LOT of M&Ms or a very tiny dog. There isn't much Cacao in milk chocolate. -- From the net - "For milk chocolate that is found in M&M's it takes about 1 ounce per pound of body weight (e.g., a 20 lb dog would need to ingest about 20 ounces of choclate) for it to create a problem."
My sister's 60 pound dog almost dies from eating an Oreo cookie, so there is more to it than that.
Load More Replies...Good god parents teach your bloody kids about this chocolate is toxic to dogs as are onions raisins grapes this isn’t even funny tbh this is down right awful as a pet owner and having worked in vets and rescue for decades pls being 60 I find these posts scary
I agree. But she did say she teaches him not to give chocolate to the dog and explains why. But a three year old only understands so much.
Load More Replies...You Came To The Wrong House, Elf
This whole "He sees you when you're sleeping; he knows when you're awake" malarkey is freaky, tbh. Preparing kids for a lifetime of being spied on by their "smart" devices ;-)
Everyone on here is so concerned about parents supposedly spying but no one has sad anything about how sick and twisted this would be for a child to do. You thought he was a real living being and your murdered him and hid the body? That's not funny, that's actually very concerning.
The book is absolutely sadistic. We never read the book. And guess what kids ARE Christmas magic so parents can't just scare your kids with some creepy a*s elf watching all the time. In our house if you make friends with the elf and write letters she writes you back and is your friend. It's only when the parents touch the elf that it loses it's magic. Unfortunately I waited too long to get one and a******s on the internet ruined it. I can't afford to do all this extravagant stuff every night and my daughter realized she wasn't real because she saw what all these other people were doing and ours did not seem magical at sll. But we had 2 magic Christmases and lots of letters and memories between my daughter and Ellie Sparkles.
Only Smart People Wore Glasses
I don't see how that has ever happened. The measure your eyes first, the test is just for finetuning.
My Little Brother (10) Got Stuck In A Cat Donut
I got one just like those. Not holding out for a little brother, tho. My parents are in their 70s. 🙃
The claustrophobic in me got a slight panic hot flash from this picture.
There's a zipper on the inside and outside to hold the sides together.
They Didn't Think That Was An Option
Oh this happened to me 3 years ago. Never put a pitbull on a retractable leash. My neighbor took his dog out the front door and Gunner charged. I planted my feet and held on tight as I could. He got 25 feet of momentum going before the leash caught and I FLEW off the porch, hit a rock and got dragged across the yard on my stomach. My husband screamed "LET GO OF THE F*****G LEASH!!" but i wouldn't because there is a busy road in front of our house. I have a photo of my face after it happened and it looks like someone beat the ever living s**t out of me. Both eyes swelled shut and got a tooth knocked out. It was a big rock
It's the American English regional dialect past tense form of drag.
Load More Replies..."being d**g"?! Is this a US past tense form that I'm not aware of? We would say "being dragged" in the UK. But I know you also say things like "dove" instead of "dived", hence the honest question! Please, US Pandas, help an exiled Brit out!
From Quillbot: "The past tense of drag is dragged. In some parts of the southern United States, “d**g” is in common usage, but the correct spelling for academic writing is always dragged for the simple past tense and past participle. “D**g” is a verb meaning “administer narcotics” and has the past tense “drugged.”"
Load More Replies...Why didn't BP censor "d**g" here like it does elsewhere? Does this means that there are filters that can grasp context?
I used to walk all three of our family dogs this way...they were Rots.
An you assume that your way of saying something is the only correct way in other parts of the world?
Load More Replies...Text From My Sister This Morning About Her 5yo Son
There's no way a 5 year old was strong enough to lift that up there. My 8 year old would have struggled with that, and he's tall and strong for his age.
I beg to differ. Many children would have tricks around needing to use their full strength. Plus its a childrens hamper and its filled with childrens clothing. Probably weighs very little.
Load More Replies...I Love That Your Kids Adore Food
I've just finished lunch, but I would devour that right now!!
Load More Replies...A Driver's License Is An Acceptable Form Of Payment
They're Going To Be Besties Before You Know It
When my youngest brother was born, I told my parents to take him back to the hospital and swap him for a sister.
My sister tried to sell our little brother to the neighbors for a quarter
Load More Replies...My 6 Year Old Begs Me To Play Minecraft With Him And Then Does This The Whole Time To See His Half Of The Screen Better
So he can win or do better lol get him to get his eyes checked n glasses then u can both see it 😂
Yeah my kid did this. Turns out he needed glasses.
Load More Replies...My Nephew Has A Lot To Learn About How This World Works
Maybe It's The Y At The End
One of my high school classmates had Harvey as his first name. He went by his middle one.
Very Odd Cookie Recipe
Hide And Seek Queen
What about this is funny? It's just a kid (albeit a cute one) standing outside looking at a horse.
I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not, really.
Load More Replies...For Love
When my bestie worked in the afternoons, I was the contact for her young daughter. One day phone Caio from school, “come and get Donna”. Apparently she stabbed her self with a pencil and promptly passed out.
Not everyone is good at it. Not everyone is smart for that matter. Not everyone is going to even be capable of becoming as proficient as internet grammatists demand, no matter how often they are shamed. Not that everything is about IQ, but consider that half of the people on that bell curve are below average. It doesn't make them bad people. Let's extend some grace to our less linguistically proficient fellow human beings and stop ridiculing them. If not for reasons of decency, at least consider that there are power-seeking snakes who will court and use those who get repeatedly shamed by others online. Those snakes will tell them that the smarty pants are the "elite" who don't give a sh*t about them, and they will believe it because of how condescendingly they are treated. And they will follow those snakes.
Load More Replies...She likes automobiles. She said "Cars are cool", you Darwin Prize nominee.
My Daughter Loaded The Dishwasher Today
Grand Daughter Drew Me Some Art Work
I think I would just put some clear coat on it to preserve both the artwork and the door.
I did this when I was 3 or 4, to a 1985 Volkswagen Jetta. Luckily it was single-stage paint and my father was able to buff it out.
Downvote because I can't figure out what this person is saying.
Load More Replies...Not Even The Combined Mind Of Two 11 Year Olds Could Figure This One Out
My Friends Kid Decided To Make His Own Popsicle
My Niece And Nephew Made Me A Sandwich, Top With Baby Carrots, Panda Chocolate Cookies And Yogurt. They Know Me Well
How Dare You Be Her Child
Text From My Friend Tonight After Trick Or Treating Ended
Well you have a giant bag of candy and no lemons. Makes them a rare commodity. And you can make lemonade with them. Kids aren't so dumb.
My son aged three out while eldest girl was in school asked for chocolate so I got a bar knowing what would happen few shops down, a green grocers with fruit out the front was in the 2007 I’m an older mum had mine at 35-39 n they 23 n 20 now so son sees a lovely display of grapes LITTERALLY threw the choc back at me n said please can I have those instead mum…. he’s the same now prefers fruit to chocolate in fact he barely eats it so proud of him I forgot to tell him off for throwing the chocolate back at me lol
My Kid Painted A Picture And Wanted To Hang It On The Wall, So She Used Paint To Do That
Most kids' paints are washable these days. I hope that is the case here!
Don't Forget To Subscribe
Jesus. That's dreadful. Kids are getting eye disorders, motor issues and missing language and other developmental milestones from too much screen time. It's not funny; it's child abuse.
That’s awful kids should not be allowed in bloody screens until they are at least ten in my kids case 13 ! Phone wise tablets at ten but strict screen time ok so I’m an older mum being 60 n they are now 23-20 I hate seeing toddlers on a f kin tablet or phone sat in their bloody pushchair it’s child abuse totally !
I mean, we got 'goodbye' from 'god be with you'. Language changes and evolves over time, nothing sad about that.
a toddler. think about that for a second a kid that can barely walk, feed, or dress himself being put in front of a screen so much that that's how he is taught. if that's what he thought his parents must not be properly paying attention to him, talking to him, or teaching him. that's severely messed up.
Our Kid Came Out Of His Room And Said The Air Smelled Hot
I Wasn’t The Brightest Kid In Class
Oh no! Hamsters are notorious for people not being aware they hibernate. I can only hope the poor little bugger didn't wake up mid-flush.
An adult hamster is 4 to 5 ounces. Maybe they had a European hamster which I read can reach 13" long and presumably weigh a bit more.
some homes are old and have smaller pipes for their plumbing
Load More Replies...That's You
When my daughter was 3, her father had to go to a work conference in Miami, Florida. She kept calling it Your-ami, and we kept correcting her. So she ended up calling it Daddy's-ami, and we just accepted it.
"Because My Phone Was Too Cold"
That's why my kid melted his camera on the heater floor vent.
well if hes still thinking and doing stuff like that he must not be old enough for a phone.
My Daughter Taped This To The Front Door To "Prank" The Neighbors
My Niece, Who I Treated Nicely In The 3 Hours She Stayed, Decided That Doing This To Me Was A Good Idea
Nutter Butter Chomps
3 year old found my stash. Told him to wait a minute while I finished a couple dishes and dried hands and I'd help him open it. I'm pretty sure he ate the plastic. I couldn't find it anywhere. This isn't the first time.
Pretty funny how a very young brain interprets things. My family was military so we flew alot. When I looked down when we were at altitude I was convinced I was looking at a giant playset with hot wheels cars and model kits of houses. I was so excited to land so I could play with it but as we approached the landing strip and everything scaled at 1:1 I couldn't process that we were so high up that everything was tiny as a result and that there was no giant playset waiting for me. I was crushed.
All very funny, idk wtf was going on between Bella and Ladybug tho XD
When I was a young child, I once stuck a fork into the electrical outlet. ONCE.
Should t be 20-30. I don't have any interest in 100. Sure I'll come back later and it will be short but why make me come back?
Pretty funny how a very young brain interprets things. My family was military so we flew alot. When I looked down when we were at altitude I was convinced I was looking at a giant playset with hot wheels cars and model kits of houses. I was so excited to land so I could play with it but as we approached the landing strip and everything scaled at 1:1 I couldn't process that we were so high up that everything was tiny as a result and that there was no giant playset waiting for me. I was crushed.
All very funny, idk wtf was going on between Bella and Ladybug tho XD
When I was a young child, I once stuck a fork into the electrical outlet. ONCE.
Should t be 20-30. I don't have any interest in 100. Sure I'll come back later and it will be short but why make me come back?
