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65 Times Vets Heard Such Brilliant And Bizarre Pet Names That They Just Had To Share Them
Working as a vet can be incredibly stressful and challenging, yet also deeply fulfilling. And it helps if you and your clients have a good sense of humor. Like when you realize that you’ll be treating pets with the names Big Dog, Chicken Salad, and Greg From Accounting.
Humor-loving veterinarians revealed the funniest names of the pets that have ever come into their clinics, and their stories are brilliant. We’ve collected the best ones to chase away the winter blues and bring a bit of sunshine into your life. Scroll down for a big dose of laughter.
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#1
I met a cat named Maybelline at the vet which I thought was a great name because it comes with a built-in theme song. Like someone walks into the room and says, "Who knocked over the vase?" And you sing, "Maybe it's Maybelline.".
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#2
My personal favourite is a dog named Woofgang, which inspired me to name my cat Meowzart.
#3
Wanker. A terrier mix who was actually pretty cool and not a wanker in any sense. Also a blind and deaf dog named Helen Smeller.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 3 hours ago
Oh my goodness, I love weird names for pets, but even in America I couldn't name a dog Wánker XD Just think about calling for them - "Heeeere, Wánky!"
All jokes aside for a moment, working as a vet can be physically, mentally, and emotionally draining.
According to one recent study, the biggest job-related burdens that veterinarians think they have to deal with are bureaucracy, animal suffering, and communication with animal owners.
However, in reality, bureaucracy has a much smaller negative effect on mental health than financial concerns. The latter, while not ranked by vets in the study as a main stressor, has the strongest correlation with impaired mental health.
#4
Not a vet but saw Lizard named Harry.
As in yer a Lizard Harry.
#5
Had a neighbor once who had two massive Rottweilers and allowed their young daughter to name them -- Big Dog and Glitter.
#6
My friend used to have a cat named Chicken Salad. He currently owns a cat named Grandma.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 3 hours ago
One of my old co-workers and his partner named their cats Noodle and Egg XD
Meanwhile, Reviving Veterinary Medicine explains that some of the biggest challenges that vets face at work include financial constraints, client expectations, emotional attachments, and burnout due to their massive workload.
Other major issues include ethical dilemmas, compassion fatigue, legal and professional pressure, and problems with team dynamics.
Coping with the emotional toll of the job can be incredibly difficult, so vets need to learn to balance their empathy and compassion with emotional boundaries, self-awareness, and consistent self-care.
#7
Vet tech here. Best one was a tiny little Chihuahua named "Bone Crusher." He was owned by an amateur body builder. Guy was like 6'4" and close to 300 lbs. Funny situation all in all.
#8
Not a vet, but my husband named a feral tabby cat we adopted Alt-Tab because he'd make us switch from whatever task we were working on when he wanted attention or food.
#9
I have some friends who have a cat named Greg from Accounting.
What are the funniest pet names that you’ve ever heard in real-life, dear Pandas? What names did you give your own beloved pets? How did you come up with them, and where did you look for inspiration?
Are there any vets in the audience today? If so, what are the biggest pros and cons of your job?
Let us know what you think in the comments.
#10
I always wanted to have an animal named peeve so I could say "this is my pet peeve".
#12
My friend named her black cat Edgar Allan Purrr.
Sebastian Scholler 29 minutes ago
Once I saw a cat on Twitter named Hercule Purrot. Later I read, they had another cat named Catticus Finch.
#13
Not a vet but my sister has a beta fish named Swim Shady.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 3 hours ago
I had a gorgeous male betta whom I named The Stig (I'm a huge Top Gear fan.) I hope to keep a betta again someday; they're lovely fish :)
#14
Vet tech here, we did a minor surgery on a cat named Bastard yesterday. Nowhere near the top but I can't remember the ridiculous ones off the top of my head.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 3 hours ago
I mean, unless the cat is a purebred from a breeder who purpose-bred the parents together... aren't all non-purebred cats technically bástards? XD Or I guess since cats don't get married.... ALL cats are bástards XD I'm a bástard myself!
#16
Not a vet, but if any of the ladies from our vet place were here, they'd probably tell the story of me bringing in my sister's cat to be spayed. And I had to look them in the eyes and tell them this tiny, buzzing calico girl was named "Batman."
As the lady behind the counter put it, "We've had a couple other pets named Batman. None of them were girls, though."
As to why her name was Batman, my sister, who was in her 30's at the time, just insisted repeatedly that "Batman is a cool name for a girl.".
#19
Grandpa is a vet, but these pets were in the family.
"Migraine" - yellow lab,
"Alfonzo Horatio Montego III" - I don't know what breed he was. He was about 70 lbs,
"Henry Jesus" - huge gray and spotted Shepard that was born an only child.
"Mecca" or "Mecca Lecca High Mecca Hiney Ho" - Her b**t had so much emotion.
There's more but those are the ones off the top of my head.
#22
I work at a vets, we had to do a call back for advice on a cat named Ballbag.
#23
Worked at a daycare, my favorite was "diogi" (d-o-g).
#24
Not a Vet, but I do work with animals. We had a dog named Lunchbox. Still can’t get over that.
#26
I once had a pet emperor scorpion named Cuddles.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 3 hours ago
I have a Xenomorph plastic toy from the Aliens franchise whose name is Cuddles XD
#28
Had a cat come in named Ghostface Killah once. He was all black with a white "mask" on his face so it fit pretty well.
#29
I work at a doggie daycare. We have had a mini aussie named Crowbar, a cavalier named Chanel No. 5, and a schnoodle named Mr. Pickles. Also, one client with the last name Crowe got her dog from a shelter and kept the name they gave him, which is Jim.
Gingersnap In Iowa 4 hours ago
The best name for a mini Aussie shepherd is Melvin! Nicknames included; Melbourne, melatonin, melvins and who's a good pup. 😁
#30
My husband use to work at a Humane Society vet office. He was up for adoption, not in for vet care, but once a rooster came in named Cluck Norris. (This was in Reno, Nevada).
#31
Am a tech. Once had a olive yellow lab named Dawg at some point. Last week we had this really small yet chuncky chihuahua named Walnut who couldnt keep her tongue in her mouth. There was a dog I was instructed to not even go near as he's extremely aggressive and needs to be calm for his groom. His name is Hayden so I'm expecting some giant GSD or something. No. It was a small all brown, ancient cocker spaniel.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 3 hours ago
Well, spaniels were bred as hunting/bird dogs initially, so they can sometimes retain a prey drive that can lead to aggression, especially once they get older and hurty.
#32
My sister used to work at a doggy daycare, and there was a dog whose name was Dammit. "Come inside, Dammit!".
#33
Not a vet but my neighbour had a dog called deefer (d for)... The dog's name was literally 'deefer dog' (d for dog) .
#35
I know a dog called Askit,
So when people inquire about the dog's name, the owner says, "Askit".
#36
Okay, not a vet, but my bf and I were walking through campus one night. We hear vicious barking nearby, followed by a stern, male voice saying "be quiet, Biscuit!"
Just the juxtaposition of the downright feral growling and the fact that the dogs name was Biscuit had us in stitches.
#38
We have a regular customer who has named their cat, “ cat” but in binary code.
#39
My friend named her cat Albus Purrrrrcival Wool-fric (he's SUPER fluffy) Brian Fluffledore. She calls him by his full name in all it's glory when he is naughty.
#40
Tiny 3month old baby kittrn that barely meowed named...Khal Drogo.
#41
Veterinarian here.
Upinsmoke ( a Persian cat)
Car number nine ( another cat)
A lady with 4 cats - Elvis , Bosom, Jesus and Barbara
Dog called Sol ( our Sol = arsole)
Bat man, a cat with facial markings like a mask
The Kid Sampson = a bulldog
The nurses name all wild crows Russell and seagulls, Steven
Forgot about Bizzle Chips (bullmastif) and Gravel (my own dog) Gravel had a gritty childhood.
#44
Our cats are Maverick and Goose.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 3 hours ago
I wonder if Goose is an orange cat XD DOUBLE the character references!
#45
I'm no Vet, but my wife and I adopted an adult cat who was originally named Sammy, but I wasn't satisfied with a pet that didn't have an 80s reference for a name so I tried for Mr. Roboto, I got vetoed on that so I went with Domo Hairy Gato instead.
Side note: I'm no longer married, but still have Domo aka The Domonater, Lord Bishop Grand Admiral Marshal of the Noms.
#46
Not a vet but my mom named her guinea pigs Scratch and Sniff. We also have a dog who was originally named MJ (As in Mary Jane, not Micheal Jackson. We had a dog named Spidie (which is a short form of Spiderman) at the time so it fit) but was nicknamed Noodle after getting a spaghetti noodle stuck to her face for half an hour. This is now what she responds to and therefore her name. Noodle's a good dog.
Also, my goldfish was named Magikarp. This is the only one that was entirely my fault. The other ones were my parents' ideas.
#47
Used to be a vet tech. There was a dog named Possum. Thought that was an odd name, until you walked up to the dog and it dropped to the ground and rolled over onto it's back. Most fitting name ever.
#50
Crazy cat lady here. The best pet names I’ve heard are Speed Bump for a tortoise and Schrodinger for a cat. I’m stealing that one.
WindySwede 3 hours ago
Now remembering the politician(?) Tweeting about running over a turtle/tortoise on the road.. 🫤
#53
DVM Student here.
I've met:
* A cat named Paperwork
* A cat named Monkeyslap
* A toy Schnauzer named Snackpack
* And a Great Dane named "Left Boot"...
His human was a 7 year old boy who yelled at me because I misread his name which was written "L. Boot" Which I assumed was a kid trying to write "El Boots".
I was like "El Boots" is an adorable name, did you think of that?" He yelled at me and said, "NO, HE'S JUST ONE BOOT. LEFT BOOT."
Also, my Leopard Gecko's name is Fitzlizard Darcy...
LakotaWolf (she/her) 3 hours ago
When I was a kid, my parents got me a white rabbit, who I (of course) named Snowball. Snowball escaped into the backyard one day, and while she was fine (the backyard is completely fenced in) she apparently somehow mated with a wild rabbit during the brief duration of her escape. She had three kits in her litter, but only two survived. I was like 6 and I named them Paws and Muzzle. Guess where their white markings were... XD So I understand the kid naming his dog Left Boot!
#56
I have a rescue husky who was abandoned at a petrol station in Cyprus. We named him Diesel.
#57
My brother's cat was called Tiba. He didn't want a cat, it kind of moved in. He took it to the vet and, because it didn't have a name was marked "TBA" (To Be Announced).
#58
Vet tech in training, we had a rabbit come through with a German name that translated to lunch meat I think lol.
#59
Another vet tech here, we did surgery recently on a 20ft anaconda named "Satan".
#60
NAV but had a kitten named "fishbait" when I was a kid.
#63
My husband's parents had two cats named Watson and Crick. Now they just have Crick, who is a marshmellow of a cat.
#64
Not a vet, but work at a vet clinic (kennel worker). We had two dogs come in named "Peanut Butter" (male) and "Butter Cookie" (female). Both responded exclusively to "Butter."
Another time, we had a mean pom named "Puppylove.".
#65
My parents rescued a staffordshire terrier and a pitbull mix. Staffie was named Bogart (Bogie for short) and my parents didn't change his name. My dad started calling him BigHead. Now he only responds to BigHead. His name is down as BigHead on vet and groomer records. People think my dad is being mean until they see this dog. He really does have a rather large head.
What do you think ?
Tea Drinker 25 minutes ago
Some of these made me sad. Pets know when you're laughing at them, so giving them a laughable name is just mean.
Tea Drinker 25 minutes ago
Some of these made me sad. Pets know when you're laughing at them, so giving them a laughable name is just mean.
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