Once a year, people have this weird celebration. A celebration that each and every one of us has, no matter the circumstances. It’s something you were born with and not something you’ve decided on. This celebration might’ve been cast unto you by a generous star alignment, but it might also be spurred into life just by basic biology. For some, it is the happiest day of the year; for others - a day to commemorate the time passing way too rapidly. It’s the day that you saw the world for the first time, and it is called your Natal Day or more commonly known as your Birthday. To mark this truly special and wonderful day, we’ve gathered a gazillion funny birthday quotes, weeded out the sub-par ones, and are presenting you now with only the most hilarious ones to commemorate your day! So yeah, let us finally reach the subject here - this post is dedicated to inspirational birthday quotes with a touch of the funs.

And why shouldn’t your birthday be a fun festivity! After all, you’ve made it through another year alive. It’s especially commendable having in mind that in the last couple of years, we’ve lived through a summary of the whole twentieth century. So pat yourself on the back, at least for that! You could, in theory, also dedicate one of these hilarious birthday quotes to yourself, or, being the kind and caring person that we have no doubt you are - to one of your friends or acquaintances. If a regular birthday is already a divine day, imagine it supplemented by one of these smart quotes. A riot, indeed!

As per usual, the contents that we’ve been talking on and on about are just a smidgen down below. A myriad of only the sweetest birthday quotes that we could find! After you’re done reading them, vote for the ones that you’ve enjoyed the most and share this article with anyone stuck writing a birthday note!

#1

“Inside every older person is a younger person—wondering what the hell happened.” — Jennifer Yane

Report

#2

“The older you get the better you get, unless you are a banana.“ – Betty White

Report

#3

“I was brought up to respect my elders, so now I don’t have to respect anybody.“ — George Burns

Report

#4

“You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.” — Ogden Nash

Report

#5

“A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.” — Robert Frost

Report

Chris Harr
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well played, good sir! Well played! 😊

View more comments
#6

“Eventually you reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.“ — Will Rogers

Report

#7

“If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.” — Eubie Blake

Report

#8

“I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.” — Phyllis Diller

Report

#9

“Life really does begin at forty. Up until then, you are just doing research.“ — Carl G. Jung

Report

Chris Harr
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some of us studied harder than others and sadly, it shows. 😆

View More Replies...
View more comments
#10

“You're not forty, you're eighteen with twenty-two years experience.“ – Unknown

Report

#11

“I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am.” — Unknown

Report

#12

“The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything.“ — Oscar Wilde

Report

#13

“As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.” — Sir Norman Wisdom

Report

#14

“Middle age is when you’re sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn’t for you.” — Ogden Nash

Report

#15

“Looking fifty is great—if you’re sixty.” — Joan Rivers

Report

#16

“Every year on my birthday, I start a new playlist titled after my current age so I can keep track of my favorite songs of the year as a sort of musical diary because I am a teenage girl.“ — Chris Hardwick

Report

#17

“Why is a birthday cake the only food you can blow on and spit on and everybody rushes to get a piece?“ – Bobby Kelton

Report

Ann Coffman
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ummm.... Oh, nevermind, we were talking about food, right?

View More Replies...
View more comments
#18

“Middle age is when you still believe you’ll feel better in the morning.“ — Bob Hope

Report

#19

“Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.” — Herbert Asquith

Report

#20

“Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you have not committed.“ – Anthony Powell

Report

#21

“The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” — Lucille Ball

Report

Adam Zad
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

On my last birthday, I turned 21... for the 34th year in a row.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#22

“I believe in loyalty. When a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick with it.” — Eva Gabor

Report

#23

“Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.” — Charles Schultz

Report

#24

“They tell you that you’ll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don’t tell you is that you won’t miss it very much.” — Malcolm Cowley

Report

Morgan
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But I'll miss the hair that was on top of it

View more comments
#25

“Put candles in a cake, it’s a birthday cake. Put candles in a pie, and somebody’s drunk in the kitchen.“ – Jim Gaffigan

Report

#26

“I think all this talk about age is foolish. Every time I’m one year older, everyone else is too.“ — Gloria Swanson

Report

#27

“Please don’t retouch my wrinkles. It took me so long to earn them.“ — Anna Magnani

Report

#28

“Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young.” — Dorothy Canfield Fisher

Report

#29

“Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.“

Report

#30

“Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.“ — John Glenn

Report

#31

“To my surprise, my 70s are nicer than my 60s and my 60s than my 50s, and I wouldn’t wish my teens and 20s on my enemies.“ — Lionel Blue

Report

Magnolia Bayou Burke
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My 30s are better than my 20s, I hope my 40s are better than my 30s and so on, I wouldn't wish my younger life on anyone.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#32

“Wisdom doesn’t necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.” — Tom Wilson

Report

#33

“Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” — Jack Benny

Report

#34

“When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.” — Mark Twain

Report

Tim Lynch
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Now I barely remember being younger, though I'm pretty sure it happened...

View more comments
#35

“We must both, I'm afraid, recognize that, as we grow older, we become like old cars - more and more repairs and replacements are necessary.“ — C. S. Lewis

Report

Morgan
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But the mileage that comes with it is worth it :)

View More Replies...
View more comments
See Also on Bored Panda
#36

“The first hundred years are the hardest.“ — Wilson Mizner

Report

Annie Bieber
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Tru Dat!! My Great Grandma's live to 109 and nine months. 💜

View More Replies...
View more comments
#37

“Don’t regret another birthday, the good news is that you are alive and can celebrate it.” — Catherine Pulsifer

Report

Amanda B Bench
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's been my thought too since turning 40. Glad to be around to keep celebrating them!

View more comments
#38

“You know you’re getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It’s like, ‘See if you can blow this out.’“ — Jerry Seinfeld

Report

Rosemary Probert
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The fire brigade advised against putting a candle on your cake for every year, but that was OK as the shop didn't have that many in stock anyway.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#39

“Aging is the worst side effect of birthdays.“

Report

Nicholas Hodsdon
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live

View More Replies...
View more comments
#40

“Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard there is nothing you can do about it.” — Golda Meir

Report

#41

“Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.” — C.E.M. Joad

Report

Russ Kincade
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I heard a woman say "Men are like carpet - if you lay them right the first time, you can walk on them forever!"

View More Replies...
View more comments
#42

“How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?“ — Satchel Paige

Report

#43

“Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.” — Dave Barry

Report

Gail Cannon
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you'd just eat more sea urchin gonads, you'd pass the time of wanting to, Dave.... Gail Cannon

#44

“From birth to age eighteen, a girl needs good parents. From eighteen to thirty-five, she needs good looks. From thirty-five to fifty-five, she needs a good personality. From fifty-five on, she needs good cash.“ – Sophie Tucker

Report

Jody Whitmarsh
Community Member
8 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love that none of these life phases says"needs a man"

View More Replies...
View more comments
#45

“Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.” — Maurice Chevalier

Report

Dawn C
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

as some who just survived a sudden cardiac arrest.....I AGREE!!!

View more comments
See Also on Bored Panda
#46

“You’ve heard of the three ages of man: Youth, middle age, and you’re looking wonderful.” — Cardinal Spellman

Report

Adam Zad
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The Three Stages of a Man's Sex Life: Tri-Weekly; Try, Weekly; and Try, Weakly.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#47

“When a man has a birthday, he takes a day off. When a woman has a birthday, she takes at least three years off.“ – Joan Rivers

Report

#48

“Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.” — Mary Schmich

Report

Chris Harr
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Every year my dear friend Marlene celebrated her 29th birthday. She did this until she died somewhere in her mid 90's. Even her own kids didn't know exactly how old she was. 😊

View More Replies...
View more comments
#49

“Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs.” — Kin Hubbard

Report

#50

“Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.“ – Truman Capote

Report

Jody Whitmarsh
Community Member
8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The 2nd movie in the trilogy is usually the best

View more comments

Note: this post originally had 101 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.