50 Hilariously Awkward Convos Between Parents And Kids That Prove That Parenting Never Gets Boring (New Pics)
You never really know where a conversation with a child will take you. Their sheer randomness, brutal honesty, and lack of filters make them say the darndest things, turning the most mundane chats into moments that stick for life. Every parent has had their fair share of silly and perhaps a bit awkward conversations with their kids, and luckily for us, they share them with all of us to laugh at. Scroll down to find a whole list of instances when children with zero filters and unlimited wisdom forced parents into hilarious talks, and don’t forget to upvote the ones that made you giggle the most.
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"Anything a boy can do, a girl can do better" sung in high pitched voices on the kickball field!
Well, now, that's a very polite young man you're growing there :))
My then 3 year old was having a massive meltdown screaming he wanted an EYAMMA I didn't know what the devil that was so I said point to it he wanted a banana.
Even if you're busy with a meltdown, you still have to communicate with your dinosaur!
Me too! The joke around here is that you have to get a kid to open them.
Load More Replies..."A thermos keeps hot things hot and cold things cold. How do it know?"
"Trust me kid, it can tell." Another mystery to p**s off your kids when they get older.
In a previous interview with Bored Panda, child psychologists Dr. Annie McNeill, Dr. Sophie Pierce, and Dr. Stephanie Nova Fields answered why kids often blurt out such funny and out-of-pocket things that this list is full of.
Fields explained that the gap between 3 and 6 years old is the prime time for kids to say funny things, mostly unintentionally.
Ha!! Knew a labor & delivery nurse who had great baby name tales, as in Justin Time.
That's funny. My son's name is "Powell," it's a last name in my dad's family. The daughter of one of my sister's friends thought I was saying "Power" but couldn't remember that word and called him "Electricity."
When I was a kid, if we came home telling our parents that our new friend's name was Kettle, no one was in the least bit surprised to find out that the kid's name was Kendall. Today, if your kid tells you their new friend is Arson, Luxury, or Sativa... more often than not, they are actually correct.
My daughter used to come back from playgroup, aged three, talking about what the boy called P.i.s.s. had been doing. It was months before I worked out his name was Pierce.
I bought a new washing machine from a small independent shop near me, and gave my name as shown here. The name on my delivery note was spelt just like the name your daughter mentioned.
Load More Replies...My 11-year-old daughter had a friend whose mom gave her rides to school. She told me one day her mom has seizures. I was a little worried if she was ok to drive, but she had been driving them for a while so I let it go since they only went a few blocks. After she had dinner with them one night, her mom said the dog had seizures, so I was relieved that my daughter got her stories mixed up. The next time she went over for dinner, she came home telling me her friend's mom was in customs & both she AND the dog had seizures - of illegal substances. I just had to tell her mom.
When my son was younger, he kept calling the new neighbor Bridge. I asked said neighbor what his name was and said hi I'm Reg. We both chuckled when I told him what he was being called.
There is a lady in my town who's last name is Fear. She named her son Landon Atmos. Landon Atmos Fear...
Haha my 4 year old telling me about her friends Lemon, Canub, and Prettzlee.....London, Caleb, and Presleigh. For the longest time I thought that poor kid's name was Lemon.
“At these ages, they are learning about the world and about language at a rapid pace,” she said. “Their minds work hard to make sense of the world and to put things together. Their funny comments come about when they don’t get it quite right."
As the saying goes, you're usually your own toughest critic .... this poor kid has it both coming and going!
That’s probably the worst part about having an identical. Some of the insults are limited
My two year old visited dad at work and she met the first black man who was from Jamaica (we live in a very Wonderbread-type city). She asked her dad how the chocolate man doesn't melt in the sun. The man laughed and laughed thankfully!
Your two year old found a good way to open the conversation! Out of the mouths of babes!
Load More Replies...YEars ago when the Original Space Jam Came out By two yoear old son was obsesseed with Michael Jordan.. We saw a bald black man with a jordan jersey on . My son instantly became star struck and said " HI SPACE JAM!" the looked at me a littled puzzled i said make his day he thinks you are Michael Jordan from the movie space jam. The guy was really cool about it
When my brother and I were kids we thought we made up the word dildo. And we used it as an insult, like idiot or jerk. "You're such a dildo!" LOL My poor mom must have been dying. She made us stop saying it but never explained why. I crack up whenever I think about it. :)
The comic element in their sentences also comes from the fact that they are at the stage of thinking where they take things at face value and don’t yet understand the underlying subtleties we adults employ in our speech or behaviors. “This can also make for some funny comments and behaviors,” Fields adds.
Reminds me of the joke: Doctor is looking at an X-Ray and says, "yep, this is exactly what I was afraid of". The man is scared and asks "what is it doc?" The doctor replies "skeletons"
"The Doctor told my grandmother she had Acute Angina. She slapped him."
Load More Replies...IDK Why the downvote, but here, have an upvote 😊
Load More Replies...I've got a nice and simple recipe for itching powder, if he's interested?
Itchy Man, you're part of a bigger Universe, you just don't know it yet.
She's absolutely right. The idea of sitting on a random stranger's lap at the mall is rather creepy.
The dancers at strip clubs feel the same way, but a job's a job.
Load More Replies...Meanwhile, Dr. McNeill and Dr. Pierce assign funny things that children say to their lack of filter. “If they have a thought, you can bet they’re going to say it out loud. Part of what makes statements so funny and unexpected from children, unlike adults, is that they haven’t yet developed impulse control or the skills to filter their thoughts! Also, more than anything else, children want to make their adults happy, and they sometimes do this through funny behaviors or sayings so they can feel delighted.”
Who in the world did you p**s off who would give your child a recorder???😂
They send them home from school in kindergarten around here....
Load More Replies...Thankfully, my grandson cannot enunciate well. 'Lexa biiby shahk'
Three-year-olds play any instrument they can get their hands on. Not well though.
Load More Replies...My kids have vitamin D tablets because we live in northern latitudes and they have slightly darker skin than most people round here. They absolutely love these tablets. Second thing they love is grape juice that they drink on Friday night when we have wine. Cue kids shouting "Mummy, we want wine and tablets!!" Please, please don't repeat this at kindergarten!
My son did somthing similar to me infront of a police officer at a festival we went to he yelled stranger danger youre not my mom. I took his wrist band and told him to go find his mom because i dont pay for stray children. the officer laughed
Our oldest screamed out during a tantrum -- at the grocery store -- "Don't abuse me!" Boy, did THAT get the looks...
My sister and I were not friends for a few years, to the point she called Social Services to tell them that I drive erratically and beat my kids. They interviewed all the kids at their school. My kindergartener told them her daddy beats her with a hanger and sometimes she can't go to school because of the bruises. Checked her attendance, zero missed days. Zero abuse. But WTH did she come up with THAT???? What a waste of resources.
We took my young daughter in to a strip Mall. We told her if she was good then we wouldn’t belt her ( seat) when we drive two shops down to park. Of course she shouts “Daddy please don’t belt me! I’m being real good!” I’m sure my face was beat red
I was a teenager when the movie Mommy Dearest came out. My younger sister and I were road tripping with our mom and stopped to get gas and use the facilities. Before getting back into the car my sister and I asked if we could grab a candy bar. It was night, we started our trip after mom got off work, she was tired and we had a ways to go. so, in a frustrated tone she said yes but hurry up! My sister and I cringed back and then ran to the counter with our snacks. As we tossed our goodies onto the counter we both ran for the door and hollered, we are sorry mommy, please don't hit us with a coat hanger!!! My mom is a great sport and after her initial shock and horror, she started laughing. But, she did keep an eye out behind us for cop lights for the rest of the trip. Ah, good times LOL
Ugh! Don't remind me! Wife and I we're expecting twins to arrive. God have mercy on our souls...well, in my soul, because, well, you know! They say women have NO soul! (j/k) 😄
Load More Replies...Almost to the day she died, my Dad and his 2 brothers would always tell people that their mother would lock them in the closet when they were kids. She would get sooo made and tell them to stop saying that, she NEVER did that to them! Of course, they would only do it to get her riled up. She never seemed to catch on to that.
My sister once gave me a black eye, we were in line at the grocery store and the cashier asked me how I got the black eye I just silently stared at my mom 😂
However, children aren’t usually aware that what they’re saying is funny, that is, until someone, e.g., parents, reacts to it by laughing, Dr. McNeill and Dr. Pierce say. “Children are always looking to others to make sense of who they are and the world around them. They pay attention to reactions and can feel the types of responses they are eliciting from others.”
That's been my experience. So slippery in fact, I had to get a doctor to close down the slide. 🤪😂
Load More Replies...Well I hope it's a girl dog otherwise they will not be anywhere near milk
But now we need to know what their e doing! Why do OPs just let us hang like this?
The day we brought our son home from the hospital his 2year old sister took one look at him with an evil look on her face and yelled "I don't want IT... take IT back"
Our 2 year old wanted to know when the new baby was leaving. :) He was surprised when I explained that baby was not just a visitor - although we DID explain it ahead of time.
Load More Replies...When I was very young and my baby brother was born, I took one look and said "when do we take him back to the hospital?"
The first time my sister saw my mom change my brothers diaper he peed a little my sister said to take him back he leaks
My parents told me that my middle brother told the upstairs neighbors that he'd sell "me" to them for a quarter. They found this out when the neighbors came down to give them a quarter. He was convinced that I would be a girl and would learn ballet. This lasted until I started to walk and get into their stuff.
Well, could be worse! When Mum and Dad came home from the hospital with my newborn brother, after, probably 30 minutes they said, I grab him and went out to my neighbour home, wanting to trade him for a puppy...yeah! All my friends, my In-laws, my brother In-laws, his Wife and ALL of workers know what I did when I was a little rascal...something that everyone likes to remind me till this day and will follow me forever! And the worst part is, all my mischievous thing was recorded on video! Thanks Mum and Dad...for not letting me get away with, what I thought at the time, a perfectly, laid out plan! 😔 But I love my brother to bits! Even after ALL his and my SIL pranks against me, my Wife is not far behind on those 😄
3yo daughter of a colleague a few days after they had a baby boy: dad let's not feed him anymore, so he will starve
“So, while they may not always know that their responses are funny per se, they can certainly feel and enjoy the reactions they are getting!” Dr. McNeill and Dr. Pierce said. “Children who enjoy this type of attention will continue to engage in behaviors that get the same reaction or laugh from those around them.”
"Where am I going today?" School baby. "AGAIN?!" Child you go two days a week, wait until you go to kindergarten.
I've heard kids say this. It's logical reasoning. If I was in a tummy, I must have been eaten, because that's how things get in a tummy
Load More Replies...And i bet the people wished she had a device hahaa
Load More Replies...We were in McDonalds when my daughter was potty training. As we were on our way to the bathroom she told everyone sitting at the tables nearby “I’m going to go potty!” When she came out she announced “I went potty!” and everyone clapped. It was a long walk back to our seat
That's so sweet! My son (who doesn't tend to enjoy attention or sing anywhere near as much as his sister) decided that he was going to try out a different persona on a sunny ferry ride over to Denmark last summer. He stood on the table and started singing to everyone who walked past, doing a little bow to each of them! It was hilarious and completely out of the blue. Everyone laughed and clapped when he sat back down again too!
Load More Replies...Apparently, when I was a small child (3-5), My dad went in for some kind of car mantinence, & brought me with him. We were sitting near the bathroom doors, & this (as my dad described it) "Big, like, Really buff dude with TONS of tattoos" comes out of the mens room, and my sweet innocent child self looks him straight in the eye and says, "Did you go POTTY!?! Good Job!!!!!" So this guy looks at my dad for a sec, looks back at me, smiles and says "yes. yes I did." Apparently my dad thought we were gonna get beat up or smth
Interestingly enough, kids' funny talks aren’t only entertaining to others but also have developmental benefits, Dr. McNeill and Dr. Pierce said. “A crucial part of building a child’s self-esteem and sense of self is having others, especially adults, find joy in them. When children get positive attention from adults, such as laughter, it communicates to the child that they have a positive impact and that others enjoy who they are.”
It’s common kid sense to tune out everything that’s important and only listen to what they weren’t supposed to hear
Indeed. We were at synagogue this last Yom Kippur (so, the holiest day of the Jewish year) and we took some toy cars for our son to play with (he's obsessed with cars and the services are pretty long). Anyway, he lined them all up nicely on his dada's arm and then my husband ever-so-foolishly knocked one of the cars out of place and it fell down. Cue a cross little voice saying "Oh, for f**k's SAKE!" to the congregation trying (then failing) to concentrate on our prayers. Luckily, not many of our the congregation have English as a first language so I hoped that played in our favour a little bit...
Load More Replies...Kids are so f*****g spoilt these days. no wonder the parents are tired. Eat what's put in front of you or starve. no negotiations.
Reminds me of when my 7yr old called me "f*****g grumpy". I couldn't even be mad at her, she was right.
"And no, there were no dinosaurs still alive at that time and no again Jurassic Park is not a documentary."
Keep it quiet! I was saving stories about a pet dinosaur here...
Load More Replies...Have they asked you if you had to bathe in the River. According to my daughter there was no running water in the 80's
LOL! me and my brother we like to make a little bit of fun with Dad about the year he was born or if he had the chance, growing up, to see a dinosaur alive and as a comeback he always say: "Don't make me hurt you ya pair of overgrown weasels!" Mum, as always, just laughs at us!
My little boy looooooves watching a short film on YouTube (BBC Wild Bites - Whales) about whales. But he always covers his eyes and squeals when a picture of a whale skeleton is shown, demonstrating how we know they once moved on land (tiny hip bones). I had to explain that we all have skeletons inside, otherwise we'd be all blobby and floppy like jellyfish. He wasn't sure what to think of that.
Additionally, saying something funny allows kids to find their voice, learn how to express themselves, and connect to others. Their comments also give us an inside look into how children work to understand the world around them, says Fields. “I find it to be both charming and interesting. It is one of the things that makes this age so much fun for adults.”
Whenever I was hit with a question like that, I learned very quickly to ask back. "Why do you want to know?" Saved A LOT of embarrassment. On my part, only on my part. Two boys.
I'm with her on this. Treat me like a princess? *Swipe left/block/walk away* and breathing fire.
My son called me a cozy marshmallow. I think that was an on-brand description.
My step son would say wow she has alot of blood in her butt . :|
My daughter once wrote me a mother's day card at school (About 6 or 7 I guess) which said "i love you even though you're fat". I though I was pretty slim in those days...
My friend's kid once asked her how would he know if a person was a stranger if they cut off her skin and wore it - so they looked like her. That's what they get for letting him watch inappropriate movies too young!
Actually, I read a post about a girl who wanted to donate her hair to one of those charities who make wigs for chemotherapy, but worried that if one of those people committed a cr*me her own dna would be found on the scene
Load More Replies...Well, at least he didn't hit her with a surprise left...
Load More Replies...The human brain is the only thing in the known universe to have named itself!
"That's ok. They already know, and they'll be kinder about it than you expect."
That reminded me how I used to write kindergarten as kindergarden in English for years before realising my mistake. (Note: English is only my third language or something, although nowadays it's becoming a second).
Why were you only going 68 in a 65. Speed limits are more of a suggestion than the rule. On a 65 you need to do at least 75 just to keep up with traffic (90 in California).
Can confirm. I live in Southern California and most of the larger residential streets have speed limits of 40-45mph. If you drive 45mph, people will whip around you in fury and then cut back in front of you XD I once drove 65mph on a street that is also technically a state highway (SR 39) and people were still flying past me at far greater speed XD
Load More Replies...I have an app on my phone from the ins. co. If I speed, , or drive fast, or stop too hard, all too frequently, my rate will go up. So on the highway, i drive the limit, in the right lane. On town roads, i drive the limit, and get a shitton of cars behind me very very angry. Sorry folks, Not gonna pay an extra $200 a month for you a******s.
Ah, yes. You must begin teaching your child passive aggressive questioning at a young age.
Unless the last thing they ate was a unicorn, then they fart rainbows.
Load More Replies...This reminds me of when my 3 year old, upon learning that we sometimes call Thanksgiving "turkey day" kept--repeatedly--referring to it as chickenpox day. "Is it chickenpox day yet, mommy!??"
My daughter couldn't remember the term goose pimples and referred to her 'duck bubbles'
Load More Replies...My son kept calling the solar eclipse the "sun olympics." It still makes me happy when i think about it.
That's actually how my brain works too. And I really like uh oh noodles. Maybe I'll start saying that 😜
In the Netherlands they say "unfortunately peanut cheese" Helaas pindakaas. Peanut cheese is how they say peanut butter.
I once read about a guy who had moved to the Netherlands, learned Dutch, and learned about 'helaas pindakaas'. But apparently he didn't completely get the idea, because he would say 'jammer pindakaas' 😄
Load More Replies...That's always the answer to why a kid is crying/screaming - because they're (insert age here).
I feel called out. Dude had his son in Walmart, and was ignoring every request for snacks, they were everywhere we were. I began whistling "he's making a list, checking it twice". No effect, just stinkeye.
How old was the man to get that grumpy. I'm 77 and I find loud children adorable. Especially if they are doing it to hear the echo of their voice. All you grumpy old people let the kids have fun being a child, it ends way too soon
I don't disagree though I do suffer with chronic headaches and ear pain and find the screams of small children especially painful at times. I don't do anything or say anything, they're just kiddies and they aren't to blame for my pain and they're not doing it to hurt me. Doesn't make it any easier in the moment though!
Load More Replies...Baby doll, when I die you get ALL of my stuff! Have fun sorting through the junk for the stuff you might actually want! (Side bar, I actually dread when my parents die because they have SOOOO much stuff...)
We just had to clear out my grandparents' farm property. They lived there literally my grandfather's entire life, bought it from his parents when they downsized, so there was no clearing out of the property before they got it. Two generations of pack rats. Nightmare.
Load More Replies...That's sad because my mom's wallet means a lot to me. Not for any money, just it's such an homage to who she was. Money meant nothing. Her id, our school pictures, the coupons. It's endearing. Its been in my memory box since 2015
I have a shopping bag that belonged to my late wife. I didn’t realise it had a zippered pocket until a few years later. I opened the pocket and inside were a folded AU$5 and $10 note.Tears welled up as I figured that she was the last person to touch them. I still have them.
Load More Replies...As of recently, Id agree with authors who say were living in a post truth era
Well... stuff is *supposed* to mean what it's supposed to mean.
Lol I do too (I'm 52).i can easily make a meal out of a half lb of hard salami lol
Load More Replies...I mean, unless you have a really strict grocery budget and have to ration the deli meats*, this doesn't sound like a problem. (*We did, when I was growing up. Deli meats and fresh fruit are the things I remember being told I couldn't have as much as I wanted because we couldn't afford it. Candy and junk food were also rationed, but that was more for nutritional reasons.)
Quite frankly, I've sometimes just had a good wodge of ham for lunch! Not bothered with a plate.
Load More Replies...I just saw that episode last night! I was hoping someone would point that out.
Load More Replies...my kid brother is named graham and so a lot of people call him "graham cracker" as a nickname. well, lately, a bunch of his friends have shortened it to just "cracker". we are white and so are all of his friends (that's just the area we live in).
Genuine question: why did you feel the need to justify the fact that your brother's friends are white?
Load More Replies..."Cracker" is a slang term for a white person. This would be funny as hell if the family is black.
Considering the dad's profile picture, I'm guessing you're not that far off. Even funnier if the family is intraracial
Load More Replies...That is creepy. Better call the cops and have them check it out just in case.
Reminds me of when my 3yo took kool-aid in the living room after I told her not to and proceeded to spill red kool-aid on white carpet and I was mad at her. She said, "I'm cool. I'm cool like chewbacca."
The swings can be fun at all ages /j
Load More Replies...For a second there I had a very different idea of the two year old " swinging "
I have to admit I was awaiting a husband/swinging punchline there...
Before my sister was born I used to tell my mom she should really try eating some toys so the baby wouldn't get bored in there
My 5 year old came into the bathroom as I was drying off from my shower and said ' love you mummy, I don't even care about your big belly' 😂😭 I'm not thin by any means but I didn't think my 10 stone self deserve that. Kids know how to cut, even when they're trying to be nice!
I can so imagine this conversation with my 4yo daughter. It's terrifying XD
Into a weird part in your brain, so that sometime in the distant future you can hear a song and be transported back to a very specific time/place/feeling? My guess anyway.
Eventually it ends up coming out of the speakers at your grocery store.
well she DOES have eggs in her body and she CAN get them some of them out but we'll save that for when she's older
She absolutely will get some out. And yes, you have a tummyache
Load More Replies...My son (also 3) is like this. He'll have a fabulous, wild day at kindergarten, nothing of note to report, and then three days later we'll find out that he fell off something, or someone pushed him over. He's easily distracted in the moment and only thinks about the repercussions much later!
"Groceries won't be here until this evening?" This is a whole new world.
Haha, I make a Persian dish called aash reshteh sometimes which features noodles, beans/chickpeas and a whole lot of herbs. The kids love it but it is known in the house as "that dinner that looks like muck but tastes amazing".
Okay, that sounds delicious. I used to make a dessert called "love cake", it was so dense it collapsed on itself but was crazy delicious and make with love.
Load More Replies...You don't keep peeing after you die, do you? Where's the fun in that?
I met a girl in Kentucky, introduced her to my mom as Churty. Turns out her name was Charity. Sounded like Churty to me :)
Wait WHAT are you f*****g with me?? Google time.. edit: its real
Load More Replies...We do call cauliflower "white broccoli" because the kids already know they like broccoli and, really, how different is it?
Funnily enough there actually is an incredibly niche movement in the UK for London independence
There are plenty of things she could have from Starbucks , hot chocolate , babycinno , cake
Load More Replies...My little sister couldn't read until she was six.
Load More Replies...You didn't notice that you weren't getting spoons back with the lunchbox? Edit: I went to parent/teacher conference and they had lost and found on the tables. I was walking out with 5 lunch boxes and one of the admins stopped me and told me that I couldn't just take things, it was lost and found. I then proceeded to open each lunch box which had my daughter's name on it... So I guess if you have multiple kids it can get chaotic...my bad.
What is the point of writing names in the lunch box if people out it in the L&F in stead of taking 2 seconds to read the name?
Load More Replies...Maybe she just decided that she was going to have an awesome day with either her teddies or her friends!
My daughter is a natural dancer - she has such rhythm and body isolations, it's nuts. (I used to dance, and my friend who still does noticed that she was a natural.) When I gently suggested she might like to try lessons she said "I don't want anyone telling me how to move my body - I just want to do what I feel the music make me do!"
my family has four kids and there's a ten year gap between me (oldest) and the youngest. we often talk about things that happened when he was a a baby or before he was born and it's rather frustrating for him. when he was little little, he used to pretend he also had memories of the things we did when he was a baby. "I remember when we lived in [place we left when he was six months old]. I remember it was so snowy there."
M 3 year old was coughing, and I said, "Aww, do you have a cough?" And he said, completely deadpan, "No, I have a lot of coughs."
Lol I was telling my cousin about my post-surgery raspy voice and said I sounded like Barry White. Her 9 yr old pipes up "I think you mean Betty White?" We had a good time looking up ol' Barry and listening to some of his songs.
Bro, I was a precocious kid with a very forward thinking mom. At two, I asked where babies came from. She was very honest, and explained the biology. When asked by a playground mom how she taught me, she called me over to explain. "When a man and woman love eacother, they have sex." Cue a very graphic and accurate explanation... ended with "then the baby pops out the a**s!" I cannot imagine the holes my mom wanted to dig for herself.
(NewPics) with an image of two posts that have been on here at least a half dozen times.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: some people haven't seen all the posts you've seen.
Load More Replies...I keep a literal list of all the weird sh*t my kid says. Have you never been around a small child?
Load More Replies...Lol I was telling my cousin about my post-surgery raspy voice and said I sounded like Barry White. Her 9 yr old pipes up "I think you mean Betty White?" We had a good time looking up ol' Barry and listening to some of his songs.
Bro, I was a precocious kid with a very forward thinking mom. At two, I asked where babies came from. She was very honest, and explained the biology. When asked by a playground mom how she taught me, she called me over to explain. "When a man and woman love eacother, they have sex." Cue a very graphic and accurate explanation... ended with "then the baby pops out the a**s!" I cannot imagine the holes my mom wanted to dig for herself.
(NewPics) with an image of two posts that have been on here at least a half dozen times.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: some people haven't seen all the posts you've seen.
Load More Replies...I keep a literal list of all the weird sh*t my kid says. Have you never been around a small child?
Load More Replies...
