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Whether we like it or not, conflicts are inevitable in any long-term relationship. Nearly everyone knows that finding someone you can be completely honest with comes with many ups and downs that reveal the most annoying behaviors imaginable. But while some disagreements can get seriously spicy, partners also often lose control and get angry over absolutely nothing.

Attorney, advocate, and author Rabia Chaudry set out on a mission to discover the stupidest and most meaningless arguments married couples "just cannot, will not stop having". Her Twitter thread quickly blew up with people opening up about the most infuriating habits their spouses have that make them fight about it for years.

From never squishing out the sponge to refusing to close the drawers all the way, every couple has things they repeatedly return to because both sides refuse to back down. Continue scrolling because we’ve selected some of the funniest examples from the thread. Upvote the ones you can relate to all too well, and be sure to share your own pet peeves with us in the comments!

Image credits: rabiasquared

#2

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Jontelle
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So true! I can send my SO to the store with a list and he’ll STILL mess up somehow.

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Karri Berkowitz
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mine leaves the sponge in the sink, every time, and it's always in the one spot with water and the food he didn't clean out. I have to throw it out

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If Rabia Chaudry’s name sounds familiar, it might be because she’s the author of the New York Times bestselling book Adnan's Story. She has also amassed quite a following on Twitter where almost 202K users are engaged in what she has to say and, luckily for us, share their own funny and genuine stories. The post in question, which has received over 19K likes, proved that couples all over the world get peeved off by the most foolish things.

Hundreds of replies on this thread had to do with household tasks not being completed correctly. Well, at least in their partner's eyes. But whether you’re in a meaningful relationship or decided to tie the knot, sharing a space together is bound to be at least a bit of a challenge. At the bare minimum, you’ll have a partner that tells you you never fold the socks right.

#4

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Strawberry Pizza
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I believe some decorative plastic fruit would solve this problem. No rotting = no more buying fruit.

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#6

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When you decide to be with one person for a long time, it's only natural for the quirks you found sweet at the beginning of the relationship to irritate you as time flies. But those little habits sure have a way of blowing up into a major argument or at least something you always have at the back of your mind.

But not all fights are created equal. While some are more severe and worth talking through, others are downright ridiculous and illogical. "Partners often say, 'We argue over stupid things,'" licensed relationship therapist Dr. Jason N. Linder wrote in Psychology Today. "This is somewhat true. That said, there are a lot more things partners are actually arguing about under the surface than what meets the eye, especially for the partners themselves."

#7

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We have a TV series about these people: Help, my husband is a handyman.

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Ozacoter
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My partner was the same with decoration. I put some paintings, pictures and plants in the house and he kept whining about how i "invaded his space". Now i took them all out because we are moving and he was like "now the house looks so much uglier". I know.

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"Focusing on the content of arguments (i.e who forgot to mail the important package) misses the forest for the trees. What fights are really about is the emotional safety in a relationship, partner's subjective sense of the other’s caring from them (or being there for them), and fear that they will get hurt."

He explained that getting to what’s underneath leads us to the cause of arguments and relationship distress. "Partners need to learn to reach out to each other with those feelings such as sadness about the disconnection, feelings of failure or inadequacy, or fear of rejection.”

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Deborah B
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Leave it in the cabinet. Don't buy chips. "There's still a pack in the cupboard".

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Unfortunately, it might be easy to fall into the trap of thinking that fighting with your partner is a bad sign for the relationship itself. But we all know that every single couple has had at least one or two arguments. In fact, experts say that such disagreements can also be beneficial.

"I am more worried about my clients who say they never argue with their partners,” Maryann W. Mathai, a licensed counselor who specializes in helping people heal from toxic relationships, told Bustle. "It signals passivity, emotions being ignored, or a lack of self in the relationship — all of which are unhealthy."

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Next time put their laundry around the washing machine. When there are no clean clothes for them anymore, they will understand.

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PumpernickelsBum
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've done this with my husband. Doesn't work on him. He still wonders why he has no clean clothes even though he leaves them all over the house.

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Memere
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

House rules: if it's not in the laundry basket or hamper, it doesn't get washed.

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Awsomemom52
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I simply refuse to wash dirty laundry for family members, that is not in the hamper and in front of the washing machine. If you want it washed, put it where it belongs and ask me nicely to wash it for you... I'm not your maid!

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Callie Ge
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had this problem with my Ex husband. He would Never put his dirty clothes in the basket So, I started washing Only what was in the dirty washing basket. He would ask, “where’s my ( item of clothing)” I would say “ I washed everything that was in the basket” . His shirt or whatever would be unwashed sitting on the floor, it took a while but once he realised I wasn’t going to pick up after him he started putting his dirty clothes In the basket.

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Sarah Mathiason
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hate when someone just assumes (Maybe because you've done it once or a few times) that you'll do s**t for them. If I find out someone expects something from me that isn't my problem, I will never do it again...ever

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Anne Mitchell
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hubby would leave his undies and socks on the bedroom floor. I got sick of asking him to put them in the laundry basket so I kicked them under the bed. When he had none clean to wear he asked where they were and I told hin they were where he left them. If he wanted them washed then he had to put them out to be washed. It was the only habit he changed and household task he did in him in 20 years of marriage.

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Camp Happi
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Half-dirty clothes on chair. Dirty clothes actually in hamper. Clean clothes in basket on bench and never make it to dresser. He pulls it all out of the basket. I used to do his laundry with mine. I would have it nicely folded in a basket on the dryer. I told him he had to carry it up himself. He would get dressed downstairs next to the dryer. I LOVE HIM BUT I WILL NEVER DO HIS LAUNDRY AGAIN.

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MonicaChicagoGal
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mine leaves dirty socks in front of the couch EVERY night what is wrong with you and the friggin socks!

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Stephen Steve Stephenson III
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mine puts laundry on top of the basket as if lifting the lid is an insurmountable task

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Pat Ucu
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes!!!! the one time he tried lifting the lid of the laundry basket he broke it.

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Belinda Matson
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's not laundry that's his donation pile. Kind of him to give so much stuff to charity.

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2x4b523p
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My adult stepson moved in with my husband and I after losing his job. I had to teach him how to use washing machine. He started a program and then let the laundry rot in there for days. After weeks of this reminding him every time I said OK I will do the laundry as long as it’s in the hamper next to washer. He would not put it there untill he had literally nothing to wear and I had to run the washer nonstop for 3 days just for him. After a while I said I am done. Do your own washing and if it’s still in the washer when I need to use it I’m dumping the wet stinky mess in your room. And I did. He takes his washing to his mom now. I feel sorry for his future wife.

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Thomas Sweda
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Friend’s teenage son would never put dirty clothes in the hamper. Bedroom floor knee deep. Just before he got home from schoolonderzoek day, she put them ALL on the outside of the front door. Minutes later, door opens, he steps over the pile, goes into his room and closes the door. Teen 1, mom 0 !

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Joey Marlin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Never understand these battles. Just leave their door shut and let them live in it. If they want clean clothes show them how to use a washing machine, put up instructions even, and leave them be. Don't pick up after them. Otherwise some poor sod is going to end up with that son as a partner not pulling their weight and here on BP being moaned about by their spouse. Teen didn't really win here, neither did, not long term.

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Valerie G.
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My hubby started picking up his dirty underwear when the cat started dragging them down the hall and depositing them on the living room carpet, usually when we had company.

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JJ
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband does that, too, additionally to leaving his clothes in like seven other spots. The problem is, once I put it in the basket, he's like, "Have you seen my xyz? I left in on the floor in your office." Followed by, "I wanted to wear it one more time." Right... after it was lying there for three days, yeah?

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Jonathan West
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That dude def doesn't know your system or else he'd have put em in there.

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Alice Leviath
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband did this before. Few months after we married, he did this.. I never clean his mess, his clothes thrown everywhere.. near the basket, near the hanging wardrobe, behind the door and I just let it be. Eventually he clean it himself now and then

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Pat Ucu
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

it's the same thing that makes them leave their shoes NEXT to the shoe rack, sometimes makes me feel like hurling the damn shoes out of the door as hard as I can.

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CallMe_FrenchFry
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband did this and I just quit washing anything that wasn’t in the hamper. He quit doing it pretty quickly!

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DDmaybeandor
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because the cloths are only somewhat dirty and need to air out in order to be worn again. You don’t want the slightly dirty cloths to smell like completely dirty cloths do you?

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Memere
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have over-the-door hooks for the "worn once, can be worn again" clothes - keeps them off the floor & airs them out! And I can put them on hangers if I need to.

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Trina Selleck
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh, thank god there’s someone else who does this cos I thought my husband was the only one lol it just doesn’t make sense lol I’ve left them on the ground n said I will wash whatever is placed in the dirty clothes hamper.. after two weeks I gave in

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Joshua
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My wife: “The floor is not our friend.” Also, “ Floor is not storage.”

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Zuzu Dominguez
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My fiancee leaves his clean or lightly worn clothes everywhere (ground, bed, bathroom counter, kitchen table, ON TOP of dresser) literally anywhere that isn't IN the dresser or hung up even though he intends to wear it again or only tried it on and decided against it. It drives me insane when i try to clean or do laundry because he doesn't want some things washed frequently. I, on the other hand, for some reason never close the cupboard doors and leave clean dishes in little piles instead of putting them away immediately then forget about them. No one is perfect but we work well.

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Dawn Michele
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG. YES !! I literally wrote on the floor of the laundry room "NOT LAUNDRY BASKET" with an arrow pointing to the laundry basket. I am on complete strike and refuse to do his laundry if it's not in the basket

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TumZ
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We're both guilty of this one! So it doesn't drive either of us nuts

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Jody Whitmarsh
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I gotta that laundry doesn't get washed then. Only the clothes that make the basket, make the washer, eh?

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Leo Domitrix
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can sympathize with this, as you may have water on the floor if the shower is not closed off enough, and open drawers kill shinbones.

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Chores and other responsibilities are some of the most common argument topics between married couples. It’s important to distinguish, however, whether these silly quarrels are healthy or toxic for your relationship. For example, if you start nitpicking your partner about the way they wash the dishes but end up blatantly declaring you dislike the company of their parents, that’s a red flag for toxic communication patterns. When arguing, you stay focused on the topic and issue at hand, so avoid looking for opportunities to air other grievances.

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D. Pitbull
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ahh... I guess I remove eggs like OP's wife... because we usually grab the carton from one end or the other, not in the front 'n' center... so the weight is evenly distributed...

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Mathai explained that while it is normal to need space after a disagreement, routinely withdrawing for days at a time shows your fights could be toxic. "Researchers have shown that stonewalling, the term for withdrawing and avoidance, is a predictor of divorce," she added. "Shutting down and emotionally leaving the conversation will trigger the other partner to feel alone and overwhelmed."

"You both may have different needs or time frames to cool down after an argument, but a sign of healthy relationships is [that] couples come back to each other quickly," Mathai explained. "There is truth behind the old saying 'Never go to bed angry.'"

After all, we're all guilty of having weird little quirks that might annoy people around us. Some of these behaviors are more benign, others are pretty bizarre. But as they say, communication is key, so if you find a way to talk through them and even sometimes kindly poke fun at them, you might be on the right path.

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Green Machine
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel like the couples arguing over bars of soap should switch to liquid body wash. :)

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D. Pitbull
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

omg... my dad was like this... no matter how much time he had before the family had to leave for whatever... the MOMENT we're supposed to go out the door.... he had to go to the bathroom. It was. so. odd.

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Frances M
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You don’t have a spoon anyway, you have a solid lump of tea stained sugar with a metal bit sticking out the top.

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ToGo
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'll agree on the basis that I HATE when people nix ideas without offering a suggestion. I'm not your hired "idea's person".

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Karen Tyas
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Meanwhile he’s like “My wife is great, always puts gas in my car for me!”

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pretend you didn't hear that he said something and keep pretending until he speaks so you can understand him. Rinse and repeat for as long as it takes to get the message home. I took me 6 weeks to teach my wife that, since I'm getting deaf, I can't hear her when she's whispering from the other side of the room.

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Ozacoter
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am sorry for op. That sounds like an awful partner

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Buren
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Agree to disagree and adopt new pronounciation such as cow-poo to save your marriage.

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Belinda Matson
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Put it in random places. On his pillow, his dashboard, in his drawers, at a crime scene.

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Leo Domitrix
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've learned to preface some questions with "It's yes or no question. One-word answer only. (Fill in question)." B/c I got tired of essay answers to yes-no questions. We've gotten around it over the years, but twenty-five years ago? It'd take him ten minutes to answer "yes" or "no" or for me to work out which it was. And the question would be something like, "Do you want dessert?"

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Madzdad the Bard
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My ex said it was an "accident" when she slept with someone else. What does that mean? He tripped and his d**k fell into your vagina?

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DuchessDegu
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wanna swap? I'm like that, if it's important put it away. My partner leaves everything anywhere and when he can't find it, he'd buy a new one or ask for a copy. Then leaves it anywhere and buys a third one when he can't find the previous two. I lost count of how many superglue, toothpick packs, torches, sealants and tin openers I found last time I went on a cleanup bender

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LH25
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So buy her a pair of her own. If she wants to wear the old ones, you wear the new ones.

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Whodathunkit
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I often don't close cabinets. I don't even realize I'm doing it. Sometimes I wonder if this stems from when I was young. My father was a bit of an a*****e so I used to get up earlier than him for school so I didn't have to deal with him. His bedroom was right near the kitchen, so I tried to be very quiet and didn't close cabinets.

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finisz
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No problem, till you also do just your stuff: washing just your clothes, cooking just for you and so on....

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Pan dulce
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you do the laundry, Don't wash them & tell him they weren't in the hamper so... they must be clean? Maybe he'll have better aim next time

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Lady Goldberry
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She just needs to buy mens boxers of her own. I get it, they're comfy as.

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William Arndt
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Human presence light switches turn off after no motion. I installed in garage, walk ins, bathrooms and kitchen.

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JJ
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ah, yes, when I got married, I never thought "What's for dinner?" would be the most discussed topic in my marriage... 😆

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Fox Smith
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The correct answer is: separate bedrooms. You are obviously not compatible to share a place meant for sleep.

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Protocol dictates that your farts should always be directed away from your partner. It also dictates that you sniff your own farts.

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ToGo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Funniest? Eek! A) It's not a laughing matter, B) if this tragedy actually happens to you and your husband is worried about if you have nipples or not, you're with the wrong guy.

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Donna Clanclan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OOf. Mine tosses them in the sink with no thought to what might already be in the sink. We've lost so many glass dishes this way.

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Jo Morris
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Solve the laundry problem by only washing in cold water. No need to separate clothing.

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Kay blue
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If he's anything like me, he needs on his nightstand so he doesn't forget to take it.

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D. Pitbull
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Looks like there could be pixies and fairies making little homes in the grass...

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nini
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We also sometimes have similar discussions about the proper "crunchiness" of cookedvegetables. He likes them basically raw, I prefer them "al dente". So we take his badge out and let mine cook for a little longer 😋

#68

Married-People-Sharing-Stupid-Recurring-Argument

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Ghosts
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What's wrong with that? I wouldn't be drinking water from the bathroom sink either. I've got a perfectly good kitchen.

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#69

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Heather Glomb
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So, take an extra 5 seconds to check the counter and wipe up the excess water...

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#71

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Bobby
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because small cereal still falls through it and can cause backups later? Just eat the last 7 pieces of cereal left in the bowl so there aren't any solids that need to be filtered

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#73

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#76

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'd like to see an inventory of all towels and bed linens in the house before commenting.

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#79

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Donna Clanclan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

His plate is set before him, then mine in front of me. He will have cut into his dinner and have a fork of his food ready for me to try before I've gotten mine started. Drives me crazy. AT LEAST LET ME HAVE A BITE OF MY OWN FOOD BEFORE YOU DEMAND I HAVE SOME OF YOURS. He has gone so far as to keep the pepper out of my reach to make sure I can't try my food before he passes me some of his.

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#81

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Steve
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sounds those two don't know how to communicate or would rather die on their hills than to talk.

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#82

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Hawkmoon
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do that too... I think it's easier to put things in designated places when they're out of a bag and you can see what goes where at once (and not open the fridge , close it, open a cupboard, close it, reopen the fridge,...).

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#83

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#85

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For some people it's the only place where they can get some R&R without someone constantly nagging them.

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#88

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Phil Vaive
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dirty dishes do NOT go in the sink. When you fill it with soap and water, you can't see what you're sticking your hands into and you could really injure yourself.

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#91

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Stephanie A Mutti
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I guess it depends on how much you value the word COAST in East Coast. I agree that Ohio is NOT on the East Coast because it is not on the coast. BUT there is neither Pine nor Apple in Pineapple so....

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#92

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Ghosts
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It would make zero difference if you pre-sort or post-sort. You still have to sort.

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#96

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Phil Vaive
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep, that's basic math. If you take a 2x2 square, the sum of the sides is 8. If you cut it in half, you have two 1x2 rectangles, and the sum of the sides is 6x2=12.

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#97

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#98

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#101

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#102

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Ernesto
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

#102: "He never puts dishes in the sink!" ... #103: "He always puts dishes in the sink!"

#103

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