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The UK has its own breed of humor and what gets a Brit laughing may leave outsiders scratching their heads.
Heavy on self-deprecation, almost undetectable sarcasm, and constant deadpan delivery, it can feel like a totally different language.
But fear not, we’ve put together a new piece about the social media magazine 'British Memes' to help you understand (and use!) their jokes just as effectively as they do.
So continue scrolling and happy learning!
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This post may include affiliate links.
#1
cats_from_the_void 2 years ago
I see the problem, you were far too kind about it, those who delight in irritating our cat lords must not live
PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago (edited)
Well kids like water most of the time and cats don’t 🤷♀️ 😂 kid got off easy
Crazy Meerkat Lady 2 years ago
My problem is always that next time they might do something even worse, I can't always be there, and they can just pretend to know nothing about it.
The Silly Stellar Jay 2 years ago
Agreed. While a noble response...as the saying goes... an eye for an eye...
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Dash Junior 2 years ago
My advice advice is to keep your cat indoors. This way a kid won’t f**k around with it.
Swinger Panda 2 years ago
Keep the kid indoors if you can't teach him some decency. This way a cat won't be abused.
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RELATED:
#2
Cyber Returns 2 years ago
There's a cheese company, Cerne Abbas Brewery, that has the Cerne Abbas giant on its packaging are having an argument with The Oxford Cheese company because they are using the same logo but have put trousers on it
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
Lol me and a friend saw that picture on Google at school and laughed our heads off at it. My friend had googled giant and gone on to images.
Valek Fermiga 2 years ago
Nation Trust- Total respect- such an amazing use of wordplay- Stephen Fry - do we need say more....??
Ricky Grimshaw 2 years ago (edited)
I’m a proud Dorsetman we have a tradition called the Dorset k**b throwing and food festival in Dorchester which is near Cerne Abbas.
From Shakespeare’s comedies to Billy Connolly’s command of an audience, Gavin & Stacey’s taste of Welsh whimsy to Derry Girls’ earthy look at life in the 1990s, humor has been central to the history of storytelling across the UK for a very long time.
But if you ask an academic to come up with a description for British humor, they will most likely run into some trouble.
Dr. Ian Wilkie, a lecturer in performance at the University of Salford, said: “Having taught younger American students, they take the British sense of humor to be Monty Python, by which they mean a sort-of slightly erring towards the surreal, very iconoclastic in terms of attacking the big targets, very silly.”
#3
Lemme get the lemons 2 years ago (edited)
Thank you! I hate those awards, because I missed one day off of school before, and despite being told I'm one of the best students, like in the top five, I got nothing. It unfair and stupid Edit: I got a prize for attendance today 🙃
Sami-Jo Ross 2 years ago
All those "awards" do is instill the belief that your health comes behind work and you'll be punished for needing a day off.
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GoldfishCrackers 2 years ago
Yeah- award effort and improvement and kindness. Things a child actually can have some level of control over.
Depressed Owl 2 years ago
This is why I don't like attendance awards. They just make it incentived for you to go to school even when you are sick.
Anxious&Bored Bear 2 years ago
And prepares you to go to work when you're sick so your boss doesn't have to actually work.
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Pink Princess 2 years ago
Perfect attendance is stupid. I missed out on perfect attendance last year because I had COVID.
liam newton-harding 2 years ago
Attendence Award, training good lil'drones...Sick? Better come in, and get everyone infected, don't want to miss out on that big tick on your "Permanent" Record. Tragedy at home? You have other family members, they will understand. In crisis? Learn what burn-out is before even reaching College, let alone the Work Place.
Shayne Randlett 2 years ago
These stupid awards encourage sick kids to come to school sick and get everyone else sick. Yeah - good job, Sarah. You're a real hero...
The Original Bruno 2 years ago (edited)
I hate those awards. In the 90s, Baltimore and the entire nations' sports reporters went absolutely ga-ga over someone breaking Lou Gehrig's perfect attendance award. Lou Gehrig was the second-best baseball player in history and kept playing baseball until he could barely stand because he was dying from what was later diagnosed as Lou Gerhig's disease. (It was actually a lot more surprising of a diagnosis than it sounds like.) Cal Ripken, Jr. was a great baseball player and seems like a nice guy, but he'd've done even more for his team if he'd've taken a f*****g day off once in a while. So, no, I didn't care a rat's a*s about Cal Ripken. (By the way, watch Pride of the Yankees and you tell me it wasn't the inspiration for the personality of Captain America.)
StrangePenguin 2 years ago
Thank you! i hate that how i get good grades marked poorly for being sick even if it’s too the hospital and then i miss out on end of the year award for attendance!
bob cameron 2 years ago
And you probably don't get proper recognition for you academic achievement.
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Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
I will never understand grading attendance with school children, who have absolutely no control over: getting sick, parent having car trouble, school bus running behind, death in the family, doctors appointments, etc. I actually received a detention in fourth grade over it. Utterly ridiculous.
#4
Monday 2 years ago
That's how the show starts. They insult each other, team up to insult randos, then wrap up by insulting the viewer at home!
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The Original Bruno 2 years ago
They have live performances of the American version of this show scheduled regularly all across New York.
#5
Greg Baughman 2 years ago
It reminds me of a story I once heard. A new house is being built in the lot next to a family with a little kid. The kid is taking great interest in the construction, and the construction workers start giving him little jobs to do... take a hammer to that guy, take these screws over there, that sort of thing. At the end of the pay period, they each throw a dollar into an envelope and give it to the kid. The kids parents take the kid to the bank to open a savings account with his money. The bank teller listens to the story, and asks the kid "So, are you going to help them next week as well?" The little kid looks at the bank teller and responds, "Yeah! If those f***ing a**holes at Lowe's deliver the G**D**m drywall!"
However, Wilkie said that, while those traits can become shorthand for ‘the British sense of humor’, he doesn’t think “that cuts the mustard.”
Dr. Wilkie highlighted that there are already differences in popular humor in the four home nations. It diversifies even more between the major cities, making it difficult to pinpoint a blanket ‘British’ humor.
#6
Chihuahua Mama 2 years ago
The level of insecurity you would have to have to make fun of someone telling the person who gave them life and raised them "I love you" is just astounding
Susan Bosse 2 years ago
My son always tells me, even when gaming, w friends, etc. His response if someone makes a snide comment?? "I feel sorry for you that you DON'T tell your mom you love her." I love my boy. He's 21. His friends tell me they love me, too, when they head out. He said several over the years started telling their parents they love them after seeing him do it. ;)
Sonja 2 years ago
He's right. Life is too short to cater to any idiot's expectations. Cherish your loved ones, get yourself those little, daily joys like sprinkles on your doughnut and fruity drinks if you like them. Wear what you want and like, play, smell the roses. There is no price to win for depriving yourself of joy. No real gain from estranging yourself from people who love you. At the end of your life, those judgemental people will leave you alone no matter what, they'll not be there for you when your mom is gone one day or your spouse leaves you for someone more affectionate. There's nothing to win for fullfilling imaginary manliness markers, but you could lose a lot of joy, love and happiness if you try.
Nizumi 2 years ago
The people I've seen absolutely gutted at funerals are the ones who didn't say "I love you", or "I'm proud of you", or "That's cool, man - good job", those who let the last words exchanged be negative. Never let your parting words to someone be something you can't live with for the rest of *your* life, you never know when parting words are going to be *last* words.
John McLeod 2 years ago
Always tell your mum you love her. I can't tell mine anymore so y'all tell yours for me
#7
Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
I grew up in England and now live in Australia. I can confirm both these comments
Paul Neff 2 years ago
You managed amazing mileage in that two hour drive!
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Melinda Layten 2 years ago
In America 2 hours is a short drive and 200 years is a long time, in the UK 2 hours is a long drive and 200 years is a short time. In other words everything is relative. I drive 90 minutes each way to do my weekly shopping and old towns are celebrating their centennials here in Minnesota.
Historyharlot93 2 years ago
I tell people my in-laws are “pretty close to us” because they’re only 8 hours away.
Load More Replies... That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
If you live in Manchester, you only have to walk five mins for a change in accent and different names for stuff.
Clown fish 2 years ago
Well yes because you hit Salford the best City lol
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Verena 2 years ago
Europe: You drive for four hours. You have visited 4 countries, paid with three currencies and heard 4 languages in the radio.
WFH Forever 2 years ago
Four hours and I haven't left Washington State. Heck I can drive almost 7 hours and be in the same state although now at the Canadian border.
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Noname 2 years ago (edited)
In New England, it's kinda like old England as the states are small so you can drive for an hour and have been to 3 states, and each one (CT, MA, RI, VT, NH, ME) has its own accent and vernacular. I love that to Mainers, the rest of us are "flatlanders", even though NH is mountainous and is where Mt Washington is located.
Christos Arvanitis 2 years ago
Yep. in MA milk/ice cream/syrup = frappe and a milkshake is just milk and syrup. In bordering states a milkshake has ice cream in it, except Rhode Island where it can be called a cabinet. And then there is soda, tonic and pop in various states.
Load More Replies... Clown fish 2 years ago
Bap, Batch, roll, oven bottom, cob, barm cake, bara, barm, sofie, bun, scuffler. I think that's all of them? If it isn't please add
mcborge1 2 years ago
Yup, ask for a bacon cob in Leicester you get a bacon roll. Ask for a bacon cob in Hunstanton, you get a puzzled look! :D
Timmy Pillinger 2 years ago
I mean most things get you a puzzled look in Hunstanton
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Jaaawn 2 years ago
Local accent has only changed TWICE in a 2 hour drive?! How slow are you driving?! Move to the next city over from where I am and they speak like bloomin' aliens 😂
Charity Angel 2 years ago
Absolutely! Not only do different towns have different accents, but individual areas of the town are different too. (To a trained, local ear. I suspect outsiders would struggle.)
Load More Replies... Paul Scheermeijer 2 years ago
Drive 2 hrs in the Netherlands and you need a pasport. Your not in NL anymore
One example is the Scottish brash-with-a-twinkle style of Billy Connolly or the more gentle approach of his compatriot Susan Calman. “Scottish people like witty jokes, there is a lot of respect for learning and that it likes quite hard-hitting jokes, ones of mockery,” Wilkie explained.
While he noted there are similarities between Glaswegian humor and that found in other port cities, such as Liverpool, that Scottish style might not necessarily translate into a Welsh sense of humor or a broader English one.
#9
PolymathNecromancer 2 years ago
And for multiple fùcks, its For Fùcks' Sake
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Nicole Weymann 2 years ago
Depends on how many effs you're talking about. A single would be for eff's sake, two or more: for effs' sake or, if more than one sake for the multitude of effs: for effs' sakes. Always happy to keep a professional environment just that. 😁
Mrs. EW 2 years ago (edited)
Ffs.. professional, because you used an acronym, showing you can be brief and to the point; while still getting the message across.
Greta Kolding 2 years ago
Actually it's LEGO + the copyright c in a circle. Trust me, I used to work there.
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#11
Susan Bosse 2 years ago
We had a mini Dachsund who broke a nail up into her paw. Surgery to remove and cast on for a few weeks. OMG. Over dramatic doesn't even begin to describe. She'd lay by you and put her paw on your leg and look at you w half closed eyes and a half smile (she smiled all the time) like she was some fair maiden on a fainting couch. Limped around. So dramatic. One day I caught her running full speed in the backyard. When she saw me, that paw came up quicker than anything I'd seen before. She limped to me and then did the whole "damsel in distress" thing. It was hysterical. In the late 80s. What I wouldn't give to have that on video.
2x4b523p 2 years ago
My dog had the same injury and you would think he did not even notice. After one day the doggo realized that me grabbing his waterproof bootie = walkies time, would run to me, sit down and raise his paw in the air so I can quickly secure the bootie and we can go out.
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High Mamii Melo 2 years ago
When mine was hit by a car and broke his leg he had a cast. The rules were no running and no jumping. That little monster simply adapted and ran and jumped all over the place. Thankfully his leg healed perfectly with only the teensiest bit of scar tissue. Thank goodness for a clean break!
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
Very good. You got fake internet points. Now go cuddle your poor baby and cheer him up.
#12
Rigor Moreno 2 years ago
Can you hear the drums Fernando? I remember long ago another starry night like this In the firelight Fernando You were humming to yourself and softly strumming your guitar I could hear the distant drums And sounds of bugle calls were coming from afar They were closer now Fernando Every hour every minute seemed to last eternally I was so afraid Fernando We were young and full of life and none of us prepared to die And I'm not ashamed to say The roar of guns and cannons almost made me cry There was something in the air that night The stars were bright, Fernando They were shining there for you and me For liberty, Fernando Though I never thought that we could lose There's no regret If I had to do the same again I would, my friend, Fernando If I had to do the same again I would, my friend, Fernando Now we're old and grey Fernando And since many years I haven't seen a rifle in your hand Can you hear the drums Fernando? Do you still recall the frightful night we crossed the Rio Grande?
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
Nope, that's not one of them. But there is the word "'anging" (disgusting)
Attending a comedy night, with many different acts, would show how difficult it is to categorize humour along geographical lines.humor
“You may laugh at different aspects of their schtick, but it would then be difficult to say, ‘well, there’s a British sense of humour’ because of the disparate kind of approaches and world views coming across.”
#13
Take me to dinner first 2 years ago (edited)
Now I feel bad cause if people were to take a shower at my house they would have to be happy with soap, shampoo and conditioner and idk hot water?
Pink Princess 2 years ago
Same. The body wash I use is literally made for babies.
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sylvantic 2 years ago
I interpreted this as his entire class going to his girlfriend's place to have a group shower.
#14
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
Yeah but the chippy ones always taste better than those massive potato sticks
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Auntriarch 2 years ago
Very drunk. Somewhere between squiffy and rat arsed
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RKBJR82 2 years ago
Parents tell their children they can't get fast food etc. because they have food at home. Now child is telling mom same thing.
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Bored Retsuko 2 years ago (edited)
It's probably the answer they used to get as a kid when asking for fries (chips in British English). So, now roles are reversed.
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#15
Angi 2 years ago
I've tried saying I don't know what breed my dog is and they'll ask what breed I think she is soI started telling people cow breeds.
Remi Flynne 2 years ago
£400 ++++++++ Poodle mix puppies such as cavapoos and cockerpoos, from a reputable breeder, can cost £1,000–£2,500.
Load More Replies... weatherwitch 2 years ago
How can this be on the British list, an orange cat?? Ginger, they're ginger little awesome overlords ❤️No one older than a toddler calls them orange! 🤷🏻♂️🤣🤣
CwtchyMama 2 years ago
I do this with cars because I have absolutely no idea (even my husbands ) what it is
rullyman 2 years ago
Mmmm I mean I've known there were different breeds of cat since I was about 8 years old and read about a breed called the Turkish Van which likes swimming. There are lots of different breeds and many of them have breed traits, just not to the same extent as dogs. Here's some breeds off the top of my head: Russian Blue, Ragdoll, Maine C**n, Norwegian Forest Cat, Siamese, Burmese, Singapura, Himalayan, British Shorthair, Scottish Fold...
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Dogs have jobs. 80% of American cats are just "American shorthair," which is just the cat version of "yellow dog," (In America, "yellow dog" is a term for a dog with many generations of mixed breeds, to the point it has adopted generalized traits, including yellow hair. Cats often retain unique hair patterns despite reverting to generalized traits in other ways, although black-brown-grey-white tabby
Ken Beattie 2 years ago
I'd go further and say it's because *most* cats look alike and colour is the only obvious difference. There is little size variation or shape variation compared to dog breeds. I think that's part of the reason why cats like the Maine C**n are popular, because they *do* look different.
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The Rock Obama 2 years ago
Mine is a tuxedo cat, but my grandma has an orange cat that I call Ed Sheeran
#16
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
I thought he answered the question before he asked it. He looks like he bites.
Claire Armstrong 2 years ago
Well, my first thought was actually serial killer but the reply is much better lol!
Another element worth considering is how much the humor of other countries has influenced British comedy.
If you’ve sat and enjoyed the exaggerated characters in Fawlty Towers, the characters and scrapes they find themselves in reflect the sketches of the Commedia dell’arte, a form of theatre from 16th Century Italy.
Among other elements, it involved a series of recognizable characters from all aspects of society engaged in witty dialogue.
#17
ynyrhydref56 2 years ago
This is why I can't watch nature documentaries. They get you all attached to some beautiful animal and then you watch it getting ripped apart by a predator.
Mavis 2 years ago (edited)
I love David Attenborough but I no longer watch his shows if its animals in real life, it's too sad. I do still watch when he's doing something about dinosaurs or plants or insects etc, there's no chance of heartbreak then.
Admiral Graf Spee he/him 2 years ago
Insects are just awsome and plants and dinosaurs
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Esme Weatherwax 2 years ago
My heart cringes whenever I think of the day the planet no longer has its own narrator
Greta Kolding 2 years ago
I'm old enough to remember a time when nature programmes just told you about various animals. Then in the 1970s came the inevitable "but they are close to extinction now, as humans have destroyed their environment".
Claire Armstrong 2 years ago
God, do you think it's a British thing that makes you want to watch and listen to David Attenborough for hours?
Jadax Martian 2 years ago
Nope, I'm American and I'd listen to his voice for hours
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That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
Lol have you watched his last day of the dinosaurs documentary? Its filled with moments like that.
#18
Nobody 2 years ago
soo, this is where common people eat, "I wanna live like common people, I wanna do whatever common people do"
Noname 2 years ago
His mum used to take him and his brother to McDonald's and prolly KFC when they were young. For him, this might be a nostalgic moment.
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mhoulden 2 years ago
They'll need to be redoing all the royal warrants anyway so KFC could get one. Incidentally, does anyone else think the tie makes Colonel Sanders look like he has a tiny body in the picture?
Funhog 2 years ago
Too funny! Thanks for pointing that out. I hadn't seen it that way, and now I can't not see it that way. 😁
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Pierre Martin-Cocher 2 years ago
My funny interaction with KFC: when I was 8~10 years old, in the early 70's, my dad's job sent us to live on a remote Labrador site. It was really off the chart, so no TV on the first year. On the second year, they setup a broadcasting system playing recorded programs, and we had TV along with commercials for KFC featuring Colonel Sanders and his finger-licking chicken. For a French 10 y.o. deprived of consumerism, this sounded like the pinacle of gastronomy. After other Africans and worldwide adventures, I soon forgot the whole thing, and never had the opportunity to sample the famous Colonel's chicken. Fast forward to the late 90's. a whole 30 years later, and I find myself on Hawaii's Big island for a work related trip. My newly acquainted girlfriend propose for us to have a meal in the KFC (@..@) . Now nearing 40's, I walked in with out of this world expectations. LOL.
Esme Weatherwax 2 years ago
When my kids were little I told them mcDs and KFC etc were poisonous and they needed an injection to eat them. This worked great until we needed vaccinations for a holiday. They're adults now and still not massively keen on junk food
Liam Farranree 2 years ago
In this picture I see a skinny stick figure with a hugh head and above him Colonel Sanders.
#19
Everybody Say Love! 2 years ago
Facts! Had the cat for 2 years and he always gets gifts, rescued a pupper 2 months ago and we can't wait to do the same for him, too <3
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Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
He got presents every Christmas, plus a birthday with presents and a cake I made out of mincemeat. He loved tearing the wrapping paper off and got excited when there were presents being opened for any other reason. :(
Alex Bailey 2 years ago
We get the dog a present so he will focus on opening his, not ours! He loves a good parcel😄
Nay Wilson 2 years ago
I get gifts for my sister’s dog. I get gifts for her kids, the doggo deserves it too
Audrey Martin 1 year ago (edited)
I get Christmas presents for my dog and cat and for my daughter's parrots. My dog and cat get birthday presents too. I know my dog's birthday because he's a retired greyhound and we have his racing papers, he'll be 6 on June 14th. My cat was rescued by the RSPCA as a stray when he was about 4 months old, we calculate that he was born sometime in June of 2014 so we've allocated him the 14th as well. Poor little guy struggled to survive when he was a baby, so he didn't know how to play, now at nearly 10 years old he's found his inner kitten.. I love both of my black beauties so much.
Load More Replies... The Original Bruno 2 years ago
NOT WIERD! When I was a kid, the first year we had our dog, he was absolutely disconsolate he didn't get a present, too. I wrapped up an old softball and gave it to him to make him feel better. The next year, he remembered and was so anxious to unwrap his present! To this day, I can't believe he remembered AND made the association!
Ross “Sarcastic Dad” 2 years ago
I even make sure I wrap them in the other room so it's a surprise for them, lol!
#20
Jude Corrigan 2 years ago
I live in a flat too but the front door is downstairs. You can only leave your shopping for so long before it starts defrosting.
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Surrealism, long considered a staple of British humor was, as Dr. Wilkie describes it, performed by: “Dadaists from countries that we may choose not to think of as particularly funny, such as Germany."
“They were doing surrealism to the nth degree, quite deliberately as a performative art, in the early part of the 20th Century. I think it’s something we like to appropriate in a way and imagine that we’re the custodians of it, but it’s not culturally specific at all.”
#21
Valek Fermiga 2 years ago
" It's the crisps that I love while running through a field of wheat...."
Marley Nachi 2 years ago
how many other people were following that example and also giving up chips??
Kelvin Scott 2 years ago
crisps mate its England, chips are something else,
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I give up on society 2 years ago (edited)
Better than n Americans park. Where if you survive you get a medal
Sonja 2 years ago
Well, some city parks are volatile! Drug dealers, muggers, rapists, you're lucky if you get through alive! We have a really safe park. But it has those huge trees and is absolutely pitch black all night. Like, not seeing anything pitch black. Not even dealers go there because even with a flashlight you barely see anything except the precise area the light falls on. It is very safe because absolutely no one ever is in there at night, but it's the real live representation of depression. The trees swallow all sound so you feel like walking through nothing although being less than 100m next to a busy street. It feels as if you're blind and deaf. So, a walk in the park, definitely, but depending on the park you mean, that's not neccessarily a good thing
ThatRandomGuy 2 years ago
Mine is like Jurassic Park mixed with the Nostromo mixed with sunny Beaches
Natty Tempest 2 years ago
Dog s**t on both feet, a wet leg from some busted water feature, trees with knives in 'em, a mugger mugging you before being mugged by another mugger and a chain of daisy-doting berks in front of a lawnmower while a bulldozer marches in... Yep, checks out.
Riley Quinn 2 years ago
A walk in the park where I live could get you killed, but the saying still holds up since death is part of life.
#23
Take me to dinner first 2 years ago
For a second I forgot bird had a different meaning in this context and was like "wow that's oddly specific..."
AnMadraRua🦊 2 years ago
The amount of people here who forgot the slang meaning of bird is astounding.
bears. beets. battlestar galactica. 2 years ago
no more astounding than people actually thinking that a commenter was serious is saying that mary magdalene had two skulls in an earlier post!
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Catastrophisticate 2 years ago
What do you do if your SO effs up but you have no friends close enough to talk about it? :(
Marley Nachi 2 years ago
lol, I had to read it a second time to realise 'bird' is a woman, not an actual bird lol
Chris Sprucefield 2 years ago
The government has decided that your actions is not approved of...
With Monty Python held up as a good example of leftfield humor from the UK, the Carry On… series of films suggests a national affection for a less sophisticated bawdiness loaded with double entendres.
While they did enjoy popularity outside the country (Carry On Nurse ran in Los Angeles for more than two-and-a-half years on its initial release), Dr. Humor Wilkie doesn’t see the humor contained within the 30 titles of the franchise as something that defines a nation.
#24
Sonja 2 years ago
I don't think so. Treatment like that doesn't invoke envy, it usually causes sadness and eventually makes the person leave.
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Joanne Hudson 2 years ago
It shifts the power ever so slightly if you'd said the dog is sitting right next to you. You would be the power person and the dog would then come second.
#25
Susan Bosse 2 years ago
I got the 69 tent at Whataburger last year. They didn't get it back. I'm 54 and was born in '69. Hahaha
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Paul C. 2 years ago
My late Father in Law, when he was about 90, went down to the local burger bar, placed his order and moved to the back of the shop. A few minutes later they started calling his order out. He either didn't hear or didn't recognise his order and after about five minutes one of the servers said, does anyone know who ordered these burgers. Somebody chirped up and said, it's the old guy at the back, at which point my FIL turns round and says "where is the silly old sod?"
Susan Bosse 2 years ago
I don't eat at McDonald's but I do need to know what they'd consider a "legend," spicy or regular.
Ann Michaels 2 years ago
One day 45 yrs yrs ago, our daughter start working at a fast food restaurant. All of sudden everyone went to the back. Then a cross dresser came in with a beard and she didn’t know about cross dresser. Now we are in Wyoming, she was 16. Everyone in the back started laughing. Just remember this was 45 years ago, today would not be unusual. Wyoming is conservative.
#26
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Only a******s downvote someone into negative territory. It's more than just "Hey, let's put garlic on bread," but in doing it the right way sliced the short way, with butter and finely minced garlic spread on each slice and then toasted until warm. A little parmesan cheese maybe.
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PatriciaB 2 years ago (edited)
You can tell who's heard of Peter Kay from these comments, it's a taste sensation!
Bill Kubeck 2 years ago
Yes! In my part of the US, it's an essential part of a pasta meal. Made by toasting Italian bread smeared with garlic butter. A sprinkle of parley after toasting is optional.
Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago
Our local grocery has a bakery and makes AMAZING roasted garlic bread. It makes the best toast!
Dustin Miller 2 years ago
'I could literally eat garlic bread everyday; it's like my favourite thing.' 'You can't you'll get fat.' 'What why would I get fat it's just bread?' 'Yeah bread makes you fat.' 'BREAD MAKES YOU FAT‽‽'
“Carry On… kind of made fun of itself in its day, it was already slightly self-consciously old-fashioned and seaside postcard, but people could enjoy it because they could say, all bets are off really, we’re going to see something that’s sexist, end of the pier and a bit silly and that was fine,“ Dr. Wilkie explained.
#27
Anxious&Bored Bear 2 years ago
Hate those hypocrites who say work harder: your college education was paid for even when you were failing, your job was nepotism, and your wealth was inherited.
James016 2 years ago
Molly-Mae won Love Island so is getting paid by companies such as Pretty Little Thing to do stuff. Hard graft that is
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les 2 years ago
marcus rashford shamed the government into doing their jobs. the gov were happy to let kids starve during lockdown. he forced the change cos a footballer cant be seen to do more than the gov
Ricky Grimshaw 2 years ago (edited)
Everything Marcus Rashford is doing for children in our country but ended up being unfortunately racially abused for missing a penalty during our penalty shootout at the Euro 2020 final.
Wondering Alice 2 years ago
The whole thing with Rashford was just crazy. Only the English in the UK needed challenging, can't believe everyone else in England was ok to go along with it before Rashford made a fuss. In Wales, there was like a tiny discussion about the availability of food for children during the summer lock down and the acceptance of plans in place must continue until further notice. In England they had a huge debate, actually sat down and voted and agreed to let children starve.
Lynne Stankard 2 years ago
During lockdown Marcus and his Mum were out there delivering food to people who had nothing. This lad is a legend xx
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
I was about to say: Is this the Kim Kardashian of the UK?
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The Rock Obama 2 years ago
I have free college admission if I go to a public university in state because of prepaid admission my parents started when I was born, and I worked hard to get a scholarship to school too. I will never tell people “work harder” even though I didn’t have to work as hard as others in life. I don’t know what it’s like for most people, but I have empathy and can understand how they feel. I have to work hard in life for my goals to be a nurse even though school was easy for me. People who say “just work harder” make me so mad because they make us all look bad
Julie Telfer 2 years ago
Marcus Rashford absolute hero! Mollie who?? She should try doing without her posh privileged lifestyle for a year then see how much harder she can work hypocrites like her make me sick!!!!
will bower 2 years ago
Marcus Rashford is the only sporting personnel/celebrity I would love to shake hands with. He's an amazing person and deserves everyone's respect
#28
Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
At least ALL of them would come home without getting shot at.
detective miller's hat 2 years ago
I was going to say the opposite would also be a fun tv series, but I can't see any parent signing a permission form to allow their children to attend a school in the US.
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That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
Can I join you with agreeing on that?
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Phobrek 2 years ago
While it wasn't televised, I attended 6th grade (age 10-11, 1980-81) in Brighton, England (was otherwise growing up in Massachusetts). Their public school (Balfour Middle School, represent!) was way better and I loved it there. A full hour of genuine PE daily (in the US... half-hour of light exercise twice a week, pathetic). Already learning a second language. Better science class. Although the kids were amazed I knew cursive writing. And unlike what another commenter suggested, I was the smartest kid in our class by most measures.
rullyman 2 years ago
A full hour of PE daily is rare. At most schools it's 2 hours a week.
Load More Replies... That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
They'd ask why there were 6th graders (yr 7) in high schl
Load More Replies... #29
Mrs. EW 2 years ago
Is a toastie machine a toaster or a toaster oven? - United States citizen without a clue (me)
Chewie Baron 2 years ago
Imagine a George Foreman grill, but instead of cooking meat, it’s for making toasted sandwiches. Where the filling inside is somehow hotter than the surface of the sun.
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Libstak 2 years ago
I forgot you can make perfectly good toasties in a fry pan. I've had nothing but toasties for breakfast for the last couple of months.
Pittsburgh rare 2 years ago
I have one specially designed for toast. Has a rippled bottom. I don't like toasters, actually.
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Everybody Say Love! 2 years ago
And when you take it down it is covered with a distinct layer of greasy fudge.
#30
GenericPanda09 2 years ago
Pity they were told never to text again, they could have followed it up with a Lamb Borgini pic.
SydneyGirl 2 years ago
I read that as carbonara and then thought, are the banana’s just for scale?
It’s these different styles and presentations of comedy by British performers that. Dr. Wilkie believes make it impossible for an academic to point, with confidence, at various elements and state categorically that they alone make up the nation’s famed sense of humor.
#31
Pink Princess 2 years ago
Red telephone boxes look so cool and posh and aesthetic and then you have the one on the right
Cate 2 years ago
They took the red box from our village in the middle of the night, and replaced it with the modern monstrosity. We need permission to do anything to our homes in the bloody conservation area it is worse if you are listed. But a major company can install an eyesore at 3am. Still cross about it.
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Vicki Cunningham 2 years ago
I lived in London in 1980-81. There was this strange little short movie/show called "The Telephone Box". A man went in and couldn't get out. All sorts of help arrived but no one could get him out. This goes on for most of the movie. Then a lorry pulls up, lifts the telephone box with the man in it. The film follows the lorry for some time until it gets to a big warehouse type building. Driving through are dozens and dozens of telephone boxes with skeletons inside. It was so not what I was expecting, and memorable to this day. I love British TV.
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Under-50s wondering why there's a little tiny house for making phone calls. Seriously: do you guys still have those? 40 years ago, they were replaced by stands, and then 20 years ago they disappeared altogether. Might've had something to do with newspaper reporters changing into tights.
Wilf 2 years ago
A lot of the old K6 'red' boxes are actually listed. Which means they have legal heritage protection to prevent their removal. That's why you see a lot converted to miniature libraries, coffee shops, whatever. It's because they're protected.
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StumblingThroughLife 2 years ago
You can buy the red ones - many are subsequently converted into shower cubicles. 2_Phone-bo...e91799.jpg 
P.C. 2 years ago
Could build a fortress with that. Perfect for an apocalypse
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#32
Sven Grammersdorf 2 years ago
She made cookies and was replaced by a machine
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Trish Panda 2 years ago
No point in her making the cookies cause they're already made and easy to pick up at the store... but we all know grans are better
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#33
Shyla Bouche 2 years ago
There's a really nice frozen custard place about 45 min. away from my parents. They'd make the trip once a month or so, and bring the dog. He got a spoonful of everyone's custard. Once they went, and it was cold, rainy, and crowded. They decided to go to the Baskin Robbins across the street. They got their ice cream, and a paper bowl so they could share with the dog. He wouldn't eat it. I guess he decided that if he was going that far, it had to be the custard or nothing.
Got Myself 4 Pandas 2 years ago
I had two hedgehogs in my garden the other night, not gonna lie, I wanted to keep them
Julie Snelling 2 years ago
This is not a European hedgehog which are native in the UK. It is probably an African hedgehog that they keep as pets in America where they are not native. It is actually illegal to keep wild animals as pets in the UK.
Audrey Martin 1 year ago
I used to live in Southport, my son still lives there.... Love Rossi's. And Betty's.
Load More Replies... Julie Telfer 2 years ago
Spoilt ! Just like my dog!! She is fussy too and it's all my fault! LOL
“No, I wouldn’t say there is a British sense of humor,” he concluded. “I think the best you can hope for is some big, beacon terms (eg. sarcasm, understatement, self-deprecation), that maybe, over a fair amount of time, might hold water."
“Comedy and humor have always been so open to counter-examples that you can never really pin anything down. It’s like trying to nail jelly to a wall.”
However, if you'd like to see more 'British Memes,' fire up our first publication on this fun little project.
#34
Clown fish 2 years ago
Ah f#cking c#nts couldn't be a#sed giving me a hazard mask!
Load More Replies... GenericPanda09 2 years ago
Ah.. covid. When all of the UK clapped for nurses every thursday night and then half went right back to saying 'but they're already paid more than me' when it's mostly over and the nurses are fighting for a decent pay increase just to stop inflation making it a pay cut.
Molly Whuppie 2 years ago
There's some news articles from the time, apparently the people in hazmat were medics, but the passengers on the bus had been in quarantine for 8 days and had been screened multiple times before getting on the bus and were showing no symptoms so it was deemed not necessary for anyone to wear masks etc. tbh though, I would have still worn one myself.
Ricky Grimshaw 2 years ago
Also there were four horsemen coaches which was an odd coincidence.
O-O 2 years ago
thats the brand my school uses for the bus - mildly concerning
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Jay Heisenberg 2 years ago
Who remembers when all the idiots thought covid was from 5g masts. :) 😀 😃
Natty Tempest 2 years ago
And the mook behind him is wearing... What? Personal body condom? Fashion onesie?
#35
karen Young 2 years ago
I am a Karen. And i hardly know any other Karens. It makes me crazy!. I only use my Karen powers for good .
Jane No Dough 2 years ago
It's ridiculous to use the name Karen as a stereotype for white privilege, especially since it stems from issues with women named Patricia, Rebecca and Gail, and not a single Karen. Yet all these people that pride themselves on their tolerance continue to use Karen as a label for terrible behavior.
Load More Replies... The Original Bruno 2 years ago
How the Hell did Andy withstand the urge to reply, "...who responded to the query, Karen."
Dustin Miller 2 years ago
Would've been better if the reply ended with '... The colleague who responded to the query Karen. Andy.'
#36
Anxious&Bored Bear 2 years ago
Same in the US: rich people find loopholes to get out of paying taxes, so the taxes on the workers get increased.
doubledutch 2 years ago (edited)
And the GOP wants to abolish income tax and replace it with a sales tax (and/or flat income tax)!! Even without inflation, cost of living, rapidly growing income inequality etc, can you think of anything that would create MORE of a gap between the rich and the poor in that quickly-becoming third-world country?? Forget 'wokeism' and all that claptrap, it's just a classic look-over-there tactic for the Right as they rob you of any chance of financial mobility. The current Republican party is a cult and an absolute cancer on the American people and the saddest part is a huge chunk of the population will continue to vote for them as long as they keep telling them to only watch Fox and listen only to the cheeto-raisin führer when they tell them everyone ELSE (including their educators ffs) is lying to them. I'm so glad I live in NZ but my heart aches for the people whose lives this actually destroys
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Robert T 2 years ago
I hate this kind of "logic". If you take all their capital, you can do it precisely once. If you tax their incomes, it will pay forever, but you're going to need to tax more than 1,000 people to raise the necessary funds. The issue is whose incomes you are taxing. I'd rather see multinational corporations taxed properly for sales they make in the UK.
Worst Cop in Britain 2 years ago
See also in the US: Republicans doling out billions to bail out banks, oil, and forgive PPP loans given to businesses without a thought... then turning round and blocking a bill that could provide sweeping relief for millions of actual working class people
Thomas Klobucnik 2 years ago (edited)
If you are talking about student loan forgiveness, you can shove it. Why should someone who pays their bills and abides by contracts bail out someone who was stupid enough to take hundreds of thousands of dollars in loans for a degree in humanities or whatever. You can't pay your loan, sucks to be you. Don't make me bail your dumb a*s out.
Load More Replies... Ghaniyah Verma 2 years ago
Bloody hell, why does the government not tax the rich as much as the poor? WHY?!!
Adrian Scarlett 2 years ago
And Labour WILL renege on their promise to cut taxes for the poor, and increase taxes for the rich. Source: history.
Audrey Martin 1 year ago
I'm skipping this one, I thought this was supposed to be British Humour.
Ashley Coe 2 years ago
Moron doesn't understand how taxes, or gross worth works, or how that 771b is working int he economy. Please go back to school.
Riley Quinn 2 years ago
Dissolve the monarchy and you'll be able to fund a sh!ton of necessary services.
#37
Satan 2 years ago
Exactly! He is the most professional looking businessman I've ever seen!
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Sue Denham 2 years ago
"Paying off a mortgage can be ruff, but we all need a woof over our heads."
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
I asked him about what part of the house is the most likely to be insufficiently maintained, and he gave me a very good answer. (Hint: Very expensive to repair.... tends to leak in bad weather if it needs replacement...)
#38
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
In Eastern Christianity, Advent, the weeks before Christmas, are also a "Lent," like the Lent before Easter. This means adherents are supposed to forego meat, oil, etc., as a religious sacrifice.
Amberlie Mikelsen 2 years ago
In the US, you sadly have that week 3 times a year, and 2 of those are only a month apart; Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter! "Don't touch that! That's for (insert holiday here) dinner! Here, have this cracker sandwich (four saltines on two slices of bread; no meat, no cheese, no condiments, cuz those are all for the big meal)"
2x4b523p 2 years ago
Followed by daily complaining after the event is over because nobody wants to eat the leftovers and they are gonna spoil.
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Robert T 2 years ago
Bradley Walsh trying desperately not to crack up. He still hasn't got over F***y Chmelar on The Chase.
Will Cable 2 years ago
F***y to most UK resident's is slang for Vagina/pussy etc, just in case some don't get why we in the UK find it such a brilliant clip.
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Hugh Cookson 2 years ago
Still not as funny as Bradley Walsh's reaction to the answer ' F***y Chmelar (pronounced Schmeller)', they left it in, he was helpless for 10 minutes, it was TV gold. Look it up on YouTube, bloody funny.
Dustin Miller 2 years ago
Man I wonder how long a school day must've been if they're offering kids dinner? And if the nightmares about school lunches are true, I can only imagine the horrors that could be school dinner.
#40
Chihuahua Mama 2 years ago
I actually feel it's a win if you haven't set foot in Dubai. Seems like a soulless place
More! 2 years ago
No, lots of souls in Dubai. They belong to the poor migrant workers who died building the city.
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Emma Goransdottir 2 years ago
I would never go on holiday in Dubai. First because the city is soulless. Second because they definitely don't value human lives equally.
Helen Roberts 2 years ago
Karen - but you feel safe in America with 200 mass shootings since Jan 1st this year ?
Thomas Klobucnik 2 years ago
Since the vast majority of those shootings happen in urban areas, actually yes, I feel quite safe here in rural America.
Load More Replies... karen Young 2 years ago
I would be scared to go to Dubai as a Western ( American) women. I wouldnt be able to enjoy without worrying I will break some law.
sturmwesen 2 years ago
My sister got hassled by tourists there and a arab in a limousine told them off. Not saying it is safe as a eoman orr really anyone if you step on the wrong toes. You should especially make sure you follow the law (not saying these are good laws either)
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Riley Quinn 2 years ago
This galling lack of parity has been amplified by social media influencers bragging about all their fine possessions, trips, and events.
Niall Mac Iomera 2 years ago
If it's considered a normal life with a normal job, isn't that the definition of "normalized"
#41
JunosLostLeg 2 years ago (edited)
This is completely not related...but does anyone know what happend to Headless Roach? Edit: and Zara??
Dr.Bright 2 years ago
90% sure Zara is still grounded (for context we're buddies)
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Ross “Sarcastic Dad” 2 years ago
I didn't read it well enough and thought it said Robin Williams. I thought, "It's amazing he responded at all!"
#42
Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
Everyone was enjoying the Donner Kebabs at the Christmas Party. Then they ran out. So they started on the Blitzen Kebabs.
Timothy Peterson 2 years ago
Better to eat Donner Kebabs at the Christmas Party than to eat Christmas kebabs at the Donner Party....
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The Original Bruno 2 years ago (edited)
Wait... Donner kebabs? To an American, this reads like someone enjoying having his relatives for dinner a bit too much. (The Donner Party was a clan of settlers who got stranded crossing the desert in the late 19th century and resorted to cannibalism.)
TotallyNOTaFox 2 years ago
They probably mean Döner Kebab, but since english lacks the Ö ...
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Markus Holstein 2 years ago
I do assume he ate döner kebab? Or is this a sly reference to the Donner party and this guy got hospitalized after eating 8 kg of his fellow Oregon Trail settlers?
Riley Quinn 2 years ago
The fact that the Tories are in power shows a disturbing lack of common sense. This foolishness is expected in the US, so explain yourselves Britain.
#43
Take me to dinner first 2 years ago
How's your blister is an interesting question to generate chaos
#44
Susan Bosse 2 years ago
They have use of full lanes in my city, whether one or a gaggle of them. Tons of cyclists around here. HATE getting behind them but good on you for exercising. Now get out of my way. I have snacks at home.
Tjoori Vids 2 years ago
One word: Numberplates. Reason? Accountability for the c**p they do, for the damages caused, for the "shortcuts" and wrong way in a one way street, etc. I have ZERO sympathy, sorry. Got my car scratched at the traffic lights, cyclist just took off before I could even get out of my seatbelt, and almost caused an accident because he cut across the other road and into a one way street. Another blithely mowed down 3 pedestrians at a crossing, because he shot on the pavement -- so he wouldn't have to wait at the lights. I've had rather a lot of negative experiences with cyclists and none of them could be identified and held accountable for their misdeeds. And the person who gets stuck with the bill for damages etc? The victim, with no recourse whatsoever.
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Hobby Hopper 2 years ago
As a cyclist, if you hug the curb, cars squeeze by dangerously close to you. Hogging the lane is an act of self preservation.
H.M. V. 2 years ago (edited)
Yes. I am A. not risking a fall because I get too close to the sidewalk (or edge of the road and with it usually gras and a ditch) and B. Most times there wouldn't be enough room to safely pass me by without crossing into the other lane anyway. I am not inviting dangerous behaviour. Most roads are not broad enough to keep a safe distance and not cross over the other lane. If you are annoyed that you have to slow down and wait a few seconds until there is no oncoming traffic don't be angry at me - advocate for proper separate bike lanes. I'd much rather use those too.
Load More Replies... Chewie Baron 2 years ago
It makes me laugh when I see them on the streets of London, going to and from work. Then I laugh my head off when a 50+ year old woman on a normal bike with a basket on the front easily breezes past most of them and she’s barely pedalling.
oktopus 2 years ago
She probably has an electrically-assisted bike though...
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dan martyr 2 years ago
Oh great, being threatened for my transport choice. Get out of your car tubby.
doubledutch 2 years ago
*they're, as in 'they are'. This should really be one of the easier ones
Eledore Massis 2 years ago
Problem is your infrastructure makes them drive in the same place as cars, there is your problem. Make infrastructure for bikes or include them properly. Then all Tour de France cyclists can be told to either get waltz over or stick to there lame lane.
#45
Satan 2 years ago
I sadly do not have a Djungelskog. I do have a Blahaj though! Probably the best cuddler ever. 10/10 would reccomend.
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
Yes. Especially the queer people will understand
Load More Replies... The Original Bruno 2 years ago
The more years go by, the more similar to what my wife has (me) is to Djungelskog.
Satan Laughs 2 years ago
As a girl and a mom I can confirm. Too bad IKEA stopped selling them in the US
Dustin Miller 2 years ago
I got my nieces and nephews something like this when they were all toddlers, only instead of a giant bear they got different animals: my elds niece got a giant unicorn, my eldest nephew got a penguin, my youngest niece got a giant rabbit, and my youngest nephew got I giant lion. When my brother and sister asked why'd I'd get their kids such giant stuffies I told them "well because, think back to all the movies and tv shows we watched as kids; how many of those kids had a giant stuffed animal to lay on while they read? Literally all of them. So now they do too."
#46
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Is this like East Coast/West Coast snobbery of middle America? I looked up why people hate Birmingham. Most common answer was that it was riddled with crime, but the crime rate (63) is only marginally higher than London (54.9). (Actually, it was quite odd how similar crime rates are across UK. The worst had a crime rate only twice as high as the best. Some American cities have crime rates several times higher than others: New Orleans, Detroit and St. Louis have murder rates more than 10 times higher than New York's.)
Chewie Baron 2 years ago (edited)
The Brummie accent is a reason too. It sounds as if the person has just given up on life! In most polls about British accents, it always scores low. Edit- spelling
Load More Replies... Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
I went there for a wedding a couple yrs ago. Only time I've been.
Valek Fermiga 2 years ago
Hello - Peterborough- was voted worst city in England for 4/5 years....
Charl Marx 2 years ago
I've lived in both, and no, it doesn't! Both as bad IMO, and don't get me started on the whole 6 little weird "towns" and no city centre...even though it's obviously Hanley lol
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Fenchurch 2 years ago
Doesn't taste the same as an adult.. I suspect they have removed some of the more dubious colourants and flavourings.
Krd 2 years ago
That's what I remember. With that weird measuring "spoon" too.
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Kirsty 2 years ago
They still have this. My kids love it 🤢 a single drop on my tile floor stained it.
Samantha Mannion 2 years ago
We always called it the bubblegum medicine as kids cuz it was pink and tasted like tutti fruiti. They definitely figured out how to get us kids to take our medicine lol
Roan The Demon Kitty 2 years ago
I loved when i got this stuff as a kid. Got it again as an adult a few years back, got excited because "omg that banana flavoured stuff i had as a kid" but nope, it was the pill form. :')
#48
Auntriarch 2 years ago
The first person to win Deal or No Deal, her long term boyfriend left her a couple of weeks before. Not the same scale, but it did give us a nice warm feeling
Depressed Owl 2 years ago
Most lottery winners usually have bad stuff happen to them, so maybe he lucked out.
Edison Lima 2 years ago
In all seriousness, they have probably shared the price of the original tickets and so they shared the prize in equal parts.
Load More Replies... Crazy Meerkat Lady 2 years ago
Even if he wanted to go back because of love and out of regret, he won't be able to because of the money.
Iridian 2 years ago
I know someone who not only had THIS happen to him, but he also later won five of six numbers of the US Powerball for himself and threw the ticket away, thinking it wasn't worth anything. You should have seen the look on his face when I told him that he'd thrown away two million dollars. Talk about lightning striking twice on the same person.
Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago
Well that still leaves 1.1 million left over. Maybe he can get the scraps
Jude Corrigan 2 years ago (edited)
What's the betting that he turns up at her door claiming he's pregnant?(joke)
#49
cats_from_the_void 2 years ago
oh you poor intellectually deprived dears, why would the government waste valuable tracking devices on you?
Vicky Phenny 2 years ago
Honestly, the fact people think there's a huge, evil government controlling the entire world but it won't do anything about them posting "the truth" on social media has always been the breaking point for me with conspiracy theories.
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Ken Beattie 2 years ago
I loved the 5g tracking in vaccines debunking done by an engineer. If we had nano-scale modems and power sources do you really think we'd *only* be using them to track randos?
Aisling Raye 2 years ago
A high school diploma is roughly equivalent to 5 GCSEs above a C or 7
Load More Replies... Roan The Demon Kitty 2 years ago
but these people will think nothing of posting their lives all over social media...
Wilf 2 years ago
There's also strong correlation with having poor education and voting Brexit. Educational attainment was the single biggest determinant in predicting whether someone would vote Brexit. 75% of those who only had GCSEs voted for Brexit. 75% of those with degree level attainment voted remain.
Andy Cran 2 years ago
nope.....no qualifications and didn't vote to leave also didn't become a "remoaner" accepted the vote and chuckle to myself now
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Maggie Fanelli 2 years ago
There’s also a correlation between paying zero attention to history and thinking the government would never f**k the people over
#50
Lemme get the lemons 2 years ago (edited)
Well to be fair, if you're on enough *illegal medicine* it can happen again
PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago
Or legal 😆 j had morphine when I was a set on fire and did this heaps 😂 it was so horrid 😂
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Natty Tempest 2 years ago
As a keeper of a small hooman, this is accurate! Go to sleep with a bottle and a cuddle. Wake up in a dark room? Time to scream!
pamela nichols 2 years ago
I was asleep in my bedroom, woke up trying to open front door. Good locks
#51
Fenchurch 2 years ago
Them "can just I take an email address?" Me "No" Me on a more pedantic day " I don't know can you?"
cerinamroth 2 years ago
Why do they want it?! I have never heard of that, although I live in privacy-worshipping Germany. I would NEVER give out my email address to someone I didn't know personally.
Hannah Marshall 2 years ago
I hate when they try and sign you up for their storecard or newsletter after you've already said no.
Adrian Scarlett 2 years ago
When I buy something from screwfix, I always give them toolstations details and vice versa
#52
Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
Twist: It wasn't part of a 'Meal deal', he was actually asking you out but saved himself by using this tactic :)
Monday 2 years ago
Very judgy today aren't we? She can't ever go to Tesco again because she can't ever face the drink bloke again obviously. It's like how I can never go back to that bar and grill place after telling the waitress "thanks you too" when she told me to enjoy my meal.
Load More Replies... #53
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
A BIT?! it's proper 'anging, innit?
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Min 2 years ago
The thing I don't understand about this argument is the insulation that keeps the cold out is the same as the insulation that keeps the heat out. It's all about not allowing the ambient outside temperature to change the indoor temperature too much. Whole argument doesn't work for me.
Alex Bailey 2 years ago
You are right. My house is a traditional build house with all the insulation available and it is mostly cool enough in the summer and warm in the winter, bearing in mind that when it is over 30 degrees C that is going to make my upstairs hot, as it has more exposure due to low level trees keeping downstairs cool. I do also have a/c for those hottest of days.
Load More Replies... The Original Bruno 2 years ago
I'm gonna remember this for the next time UK Pandas slam on America for the way our houses are constructed, which is a bizarrely common event.
Roan The Demon Kitty 2 years ago (edited)
also it's insanely humid and the air pressure is high because the uk is bang smack in the middle of the gulf stream. I've been in other countries at 30c and been absolutely fine, but even 20c in the UK wipes me out.
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago (edited)
Good thing I'm very heat resistant. I'm wearing a hoodie rn it's not that bad here lol
Nizumi 2 years ago (edited)
The problem isn't your buildings - it's that you still don't believe you need fans - ceiling and desktop and standing and window fans. Stayed in a teeny flat one summer and buddy had one mingy little desk fan for the whole flat. I had to choose - cool my face or my feet. I write this as a Montrealer in a 1913 brick row house with no AC. I freeze in the winter in -25C and boil in the summer in +35C plus humidity, but keeping the air moving makes it bearable.
Alex Bailey 2 years ago
We have fans and portable a/c units available to buy and can have a/c fitted properly. The problem is that everyone leaves it until the summer is here and then panic rushes to buy and shops run out! A lot of people also hope it will only be a few days instead of the many weeks the heatwave lasted, last year.
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#54
Everybody Say Love! 2 years ago
The "Sorry" at the end is the epitome of being British. Someone walks into you, you say sorry xD
#55
LK 2 years ago
It is the complete opposite of a random number generator. It is a statistical engine. The insurance person feeds in the data, and out pops a premium based on the statistics for that individual and their car. Factors include age, sex, location, estimated distance to travel, make of car, model, and year.
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XenoMurph 2 years ago
Because she drives twice a month those 3 miles at 20 mph and if she hits anything it'll most likely be a minor bump. You are 18 and drive mostly sensibly apart from that time you get your mates in with you and you start racing that dude from the next estate and when you crash it'll involve 15 parked cars at 70mph.
Jude Corrigan 2 years ago
Sadly, younger people with less driving experience get in more accidents. Tragically, some fatal.
#56
not human 2 years ago
should've text someone saying " there's this really annoying b***h sat next to me looking at my phone "
Clown fish 2 years ago
Come on if its England it's "some proper c#nt is looking at my phone" lol
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#57
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Just when I was starting to ask, "yeah, but what do these have to do with being British?"
Far Cough Khan 2 years ago
that's how they look like first few years after migrating to Straya.
Load More Replies... GenericPanda09 2 years ago
Two lots of evidence that the traditional British summer of two kinda hot days together has started... adults eating ice lollies, and someone's gonna be peeling in 3 days.
#58
Auntriarch 2 years ago
Not any more. Life is short, have the starter. Especially if it's scallops
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Lots of things in this thread made me want to at least visit the U.K., but nothing more than, "Life is short, have the starter. Especially if it's scallops." You guys have scallops for starters? (I presume that's Bri-ish for "appetizer?") We get c**p like "Bloomin' Onions" or taco bites or cheese fries or chicken wings. (Here, "bloomin'" isn't a perjorative, of course.) I love scallops. But the only way you can get scallops as an entree (main course) is with a lemon-butter sauce over pasta with cheese, or something like that.
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Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
"I'm not really that hungry. Can I have a starter as my mains?"
Theo Blackwood 2 years ago
Sometimes I only get starters. Sometimes I’ll get two instead of a main.
Roan The Demon Kitty 2 years ago
and then at the end of the meal "who's getting a desert? I'll have a desert if you have a desert? how many people are having a desert? do you wan to share a desert? I don't want to be the only one having a desert, are you having a desert?"
Ryan Edwards 2 years ago
Comedian John Mulaney: Ordering Crack or Fries for the table. https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=10156222534284030
#59
Fluffypanda 2 years ago
Oh yes and it's always when I need him to NOT take his sweet time to do it
Ross “Sarcastic Dad” 2 years ago
If the doorbell rings, my dog is at the front door like the Flash. If I'm late and rushing? He has to stretch 48 different ways like he's about to run the 100 yard dash in the Olympics.
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Huddo's sister 2 years ago (edited)
I can't remember if it's my mum's old lab or her current kelpie/staffy who does this
#60
Clown fish 2 years ago (edited)
Or gas mark 6 for those of us with gas cookers
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doubledutch 2 years ago
I think we're in the minority but I totally agree. Don't want the frozen pizza to have a soggy bottom
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Existential Dread 2 years ago
177 C is an odd number. I either go 180 or 200C. Which ever takes my fancy.
Load More Replies... TotallyNOTaFox 2 years ago (edited)
It's a safe temperature to cook anything - beef, pork, human, etc.
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
The last 1 is tasty. Would recommend
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#61
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
President Clinton wishes he had come up with this idea. The Eat Out to Help Out scheme, I mean.
#62
#63
Delta Dawn 2 years ago
please tell me cba means can’t be arsed, because I’m going to use that from now on
Fenchurch 2 years ago
That's if you can find one that's not been shut down. I genuinely check how online shops handle returns before purchasing. Post office - iffy, nice corner shop drop off - ok, corner shop with the 20 years out of date video posters in the window and parcels piled up everywhere? - I'll order somewhere else.
Tim Douglass 2 years ago
My son's the opposite. He'll pay $15 postage to return an $18 item - to China, where half the time they never bother processing the refund.
#64
Scrapiechick 2 years ago
My old landlord used to do this thinking it wouldn't count and formal communications when I sued him for 3x my deposit hahahahaha
Lia is a platypus 2 years ago
I hate voice notes, so inconvenient and I can't hear them very well. (I'm half deaf, so either text or no answer)
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
If you text me "Busy?" and I text you "No", please do not call me. My answer was premised on the natural assumption that you would be sending me additional texts.
Marla Singer 2 years ago
If you email, call, leave a voicemail, send a post, or attempt an in-person visit, and get a text from me in response, so do not attempt to repeat your previous overtures.
Hannah Marshall 2 years ago
Sometimes I send voice notes because I'm cooking or because I have too much to say in a text... Or my hands "don't work"
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
I always reply with texts. I don't like sending voice messages. Continue with the voice messages unless I ask u not to thanks
Catastrophisticate 2 years ago
UGH voice notes!! Hate them! Text or call... I won't answer the phone, and I hate voicemail too, but I'll call you back to find out what the message says XD
#65
Cat Chat 2 years ago
I laugh every time I get into the turn lane for my street, which looks like I'm sneaking in early for the turn lane for the light just past our street. Car after car starts following me to jump ahead, too. Then they are stuck behind me, where as if they drove passed me and got into the lane when they should have, would already be through the light. 🤣
Tjoori Vids 2 years ago
I live in a very rural area in France. The amount of times I've turned into my "road" (Gravel track) and people followed me (probably thinking I know a shortcut)... only to end up at the ONLY house for a mile, on a hiking trail... and then continuing down the hiking trail as if they'd meant to go down there all along -- only to reverse out very carefully about 5 minutes later... :P
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Mark Stewart 2 years ago
She would get on famously with my sister, just the sort of thing she'd do.
Roan The Demon Kitty 2 years ago
idk, I get mad when people are going below speed limit sometimes if I have places I need to be. Or sometimes if I'm stuck at like 20 in a 40+ zone. xP
#66
Noname 2 years ago
My mom never used swear words, not even hell or damn. Once, when my sister was in a bad place emotionally and she didn't want to talk to anyone but my mom, so they're on the phone together and I overhear their conversation about my sister's intrusive thoughts, so I slip my mom a note for her to tell my sis about how I deal with intrusive thoughts, which was basically to say or think "f**k off" when the f**king thoughts happen, just say "f**kety f**k f**kers". My mom read my note exactly as I wrote it and I could hear my sis laughing because it was the first time we ever heard our mom say "f**k".
Load More Replies... Susan Bosse 2 years ago
I'm 54 and still get told not to say it. Like "Patty. Where do you think I learned it?"
Auntriarch 2 years ago
I have dropped the FBomb in front of my mother exactly twice. The only reason I'm still alive is the first time a good friend nearly died, and the second time I was talking about my ex sister in law
Robert Trebor 2 years ago
I would never use those words in front of my mom. On a visit home after about a year in the Navy (noted for vocabulary education), I nearly used some such words in front of mom and grandma, and right then and there decided regular profanity was not me. But, if I drop something heavy on my foot, stand by....
Bell-icose 2 years ago
You’re almost there. Adulthood officially starts when SHE starts dropping F-Bombs around you!
#67
#68
Alex Bailey 2 years ago
Island of the SE coast of Spain, when flights were mega cheap and you'd worry about sleeping when you got back.
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Tjoori Vids 2 years ago
Those flights used to be about £20 return way back when. Heck, if you booked well in advance, you could fly one way for £1 and the return might cost you £10. I remember £99 return flights to NYC!
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#69
#70
CwtchyMama 2 years ago
Asda cooking a pizza for you while you shop so you can eat it in the car park
#71
Got Myself 4 Pandas 2 years ago
I did but had to share with my sister who is 10yrs younger - so I think that offsets the poshness
Auntriarch 2 years ago (edited)
Sorry, a double bed that you didn't have to share with someone you weren't shagging before the age of 100
Lynn Morello 2 years ago (edited)
We were a family of 4 kids, 2 girls, 2 boys, 2 sets of double bunks from the age of 5. And NO, We were not posh. Mum was a Tailor and dad worked for Shell Chemicals.
#72
Auntriarch 2 years ago
I'm surprised there isn't a golden version under glass somewhere, as the standard cockwomble
Load More Replies... Lia is a platypus 2 years ago
My school didn't have a single case of COVID, and literally everyone goes and hugs everyone. There was a bunch of sanitizer, but for some weird reason, nobody caught it.
Lia is a platypus 2 years ago
(COVID was so bad, so please don't take this as underestimating how horrible it really was, I'm just grateful that it went well in my area)
Load More Replies... The Original Bruno 2 years ago (edited)
Since the censors have been by, is this a reliably liberal/mainstream publication enough to read? https://www.theatlantic.com/newsletters/archive/2022/10/pandemic-school-closures-americas-learning-loss/671868/
RedMarbles 2 years ago
Looking up "the atlantic reputation" shows a very long-standing reputation for reliability, responsible sourcing, and the integrity to retract articles that made it to print but were subsequently shown to have fallen short of rigorous journalistic standards. It is also generally assessed to be left-leaning. Make of that what you will.
Load More Replies... The Original Bruno 2 years ago
SURPRISE TWIST: The school closings did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to slow the spread of the virus, kids are less than 1/1000th as likely to get critically ill or die from the coronavirus than adults, and we just robbed kids of two years of their education for absolutely no good reason!
RedMarbles 2 years ago
"Absolutely nothing" is an exaggeration. The more people are kept in place, the less spread of a pathogen. Whether in this case, with the particular pathogen involved, it was ultimately of net benefit to society when balanced against the harms from closures, is another matter. In retrospect it may be that the harms outweighed the benefits and lessons learned will be considered should a pathogen with similar virulence arise again. I don't know if that's the case, but I can't say the measures were taken for absolutely no good reason. Much of the world assessed the novel situation similarly and took similar measures and the reason was to keep the medical system from collapsing and all the cascading harms that would have arisen from that.
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#73
Sami-Jo Ross 2 years ago
I tried balancing an opened water bottle on my forehead with the same results.
#74
Gustav Gallifrey 2 years ago
Not likely. In Australia, they'll advertise e.g. table saws for $99.00, and you go there at opening time to get one and it turns out that maybe 4 were allocated to the three Aldi stores in your town, and somehow (mysteriously) they've all already been sold.
Auntriarch 2 years ago
UK too, turns out you should have ordered a flamingo Christmas jumper on line or no chance loser. Yes I am still annoyed however did you guess
Load More Replies... #75
Roan The Demon Kitty 2 years ago
https://www.republicworld.com/entertainment-news/whats-viral/vincente-the-pup-gets-a-new-family-after-being-abandoned-once.html :)
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Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
It's better that they backed out at the last minute than took him, then brought him back. Or abandoned him.
#76
Cat Chat 2 years ago
So, my 23f missed Mother's Day this year, but visited a couple of days ago. I showed her the poems her little sisters gave me hanging on the wall (unframed). Then showed her I still had the framed one she gave me at the same age. She started crying and I was like "yeah, your Mom still loves you!" She replies "No, and I only say this because they are asleep - I'M STILL THE FAVORITE!" 🤣
#77
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
Grammy don't let no f*****s mess with her.
Load More Replies... #78
OnlyMe 2 years ago
they usually knock on the door and call housekeeping. Obvs if you're passed out you didn't hear so bum to you haha
René Sauer 2 years ago
Or they should have put out the "do not disturb" sign.
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Natalie Cilla 2 years ago
If I could, I would give that woman a raise every time she shouts at a clueless hungover guest with a bikini profile picture on Twitter who does not know how “do not disturb” signs work. More yelling, please.
Red_panda 2 years ago
Or locks. I don't know about the UK, but in the US, all hotels have both a deadbolt and a slaplock that cannon be unlocked from the outside.
Load More Replies... Hannah Marshall 2 years ago
That is why you put in the door sign saying "Sssh, Sleeping" on the door handle
#79
#80
Hugh Cookson 2 years ago
Oh, that's nothing. I'm an ex very high end Chef with 35 + years before the stove ; the amount of times I've been asked 'Are you the Chef?, when front of house in full whites and wearing the silly hat is astonishing - my answer when I'd not been having a good day was 'no, I'm the gardener' before wandering off did get some strange looks .....
#81
#82
#83
Donkey boi 2 years ago
I'm wondering if anyone, well anywhere, has experienced the likes of the Colin & Cuthbert scandal. I mean do our American friends know the feeling to pick a side on such a raw topic? Do our passionate European neighbours have enough passion to enter this arena? Have our Asian fellows ever felt on the brink of anarchy over such a sensitive topic?
James016 2 years ago
That divided families. There was almost a civil war! We got past it without bloodshed
Load More Replies... Depressed Owl 2 years ago
Ah yes the Alligator, one of the few creatures that look like a grasshopper.
#84
#85
#86
#87
GenericPanda09 2 years ago
At least they just turn up and smile when you explain yourself instead of unloading half a clip of 9mm into your chest because you reached for the porch light switch when opening the door.
#88
OnlyMe 2 years ago
this is me - my teenage son ALWAYS waits until I get up and asks me for a drink
Pedantic Panda 2 years ago
Could be worse. My family always wait until I sit back down.
Load More Replies... #89
doubledutch 2 years ago
Am I the only one for whom they always fold themselves in half vertically and feel like I'm riding a paper plane all day that my large bum tries to eat?
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#90
Alex Bailey 2 years ago
Hah, had lovely sun for weeks and my garden is suffering. No rain even forecast for the south east. Hosepipe ban looming.
Julie Snelling 2 years ago
There's always a hosepipe ban in the south east.
Load More Replies... Mojo Flizash 2 years ago
I see so many posts from everywhere in the world about how awesome it was in the summer of 2020 when people had to stay home. I was "essential " and worked construction every damn day. I feel I missed out. But can't complain. The traffic was light
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Anyone else want AK sent to Haiti for a spell? Not warm enough for her? I hear the Falklands are nice this time of year.
#92
Auntriarch 2 years ago
That's not Barbara whose husband ran off with a footballer is it? I mean I can understand why she got into yogurt after that
OnlyMe 2 years ago
Yeah, my mum. I mean, I don't even know who the f**k is Barbara and I don't give a s**t.
Hannah Marshall 2 years ago
My dad does that too. He'll tell me something and tell me not to post it on social media 😂
#93
VonBlade 2 years ago
Peas and Pasta, dish them FROM the bag to the pan using the spoon you normally dish up with, tada, guaranteed to have the right amount.
Lia is a platypus 2 years ago
But you still eat it all, even if it's triple the amount you were originally gonna eat
#94
#95
Auntriarch 2 years ago
Amazing how many adverts have "maxi" on them. RIP Maxi, greyhound of distinction
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
British sitcom called "The Inbetweeners", guy on the right ("Simon") had a crush on a girl called Carli, but it was more or less entirely one-sided, hence the sadness.
Load More Replies... #96
cerinamroth 2 years ago
There's a vegetarian sausage that has been cut down the middle. Must be a veggie breakfast. Personally, I hate the tomato so I'd be happy with this!
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Jean Thompson 2 years ago
In the UK we often call a "Full English" a "Full Monty" - but I don't know why!
Karen Krause 2 years ago
No one mentions the egg? Is this normal in England? I've never seen one like this!
Edward Monks 2 years ago
no that'll be a half slice of brown bread next to a hash brown
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#98
CwtchyMama 2 years ago
Ok but have you heard his podcast " help I sexted my boss " I'm pushing myself every episode
Monday 2 years ago
Yup! Depends on the type of person you are and the type of friends you have.
Load More Replies... LK 2 years ago
William Hanson has proclaimed himself "the UK's leading etiquette coach and expert offering classes in London and worldwide". It really appears his mission is to sneer at other people.
More! 2 years ago
I thought he always came across as being polite and never condescending. I don’t think he means any offence, I used to like reading his articles. He can be quite funny too.
Load More Replies... #99
Nosirrow 2 years ago
I was so surprised to hear kids in countries like the UK get crisps for lunch. This is supposed to be a treat, not an everyday thing.
Alex Bailey 2 years ago
Well, it is a joke and there are guidelines as to what to include. Some schools check children's lunchboxes. So crisps aren't that likely to be an every day thing. Worked in schools, most parents want their children to have healthy food.
Load More Replies... #100
Isabel Care 2 years ago
Add a cheap duvet under the bottom sheet, and a long thin hot water bottle down your spine, and be snuggly warm all night
Lynn Morello 2 years ago
The whole reason I prefer to live in Australia, AWAY From ANY Snow fields.
CwtchyMama 2 years ago
Ahh my favourite song " hello darkness my old friend , why are you here it's 4pm " lol everyday in winter - I live to annoy my teens lol
#101
User# 6 2 years ago
He's a former health minister. Got into trouble because his departement awarded PPE contracts to companies connected with fellow party members. Also was found out to be cheating on his wife - during lockdown when we're supposed to stay at home.
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#103
Rizzo 2 years ago
LIDL is a german company. Why the hell does this looks so much better than at the one around the corner from me?
René Sauer 2 years ago
I wonder the same when I read articles about lidl or aldi in the US. They have some cool stuff over there.
Load More Replies... Sheena Leversedge Wood 2 years ago
I love the cheese twists and the diamond shaped cheese topped rolls.
Sheena Leversedge Wood 2 years ago
oh, and the mini pizzas are lovely too.
Load More Replies... Jude Corrigan 2 years ago
Don't buy bakery stuff in the evening though, as it has dried out slightly.
Sheena Leversedge Wood 2 years ago
on the app, there's a voucher to get a percentage off after a certain time. can't remember how much for, because I don't tend to shop later in the afternoon
Load More Replies... Tjoori Vids 2 years ago
I actually prefer the Aldi one, because all the bread in Lidl (here in France) always smells of Pizza.
#104
GenericPanda09 2 years ago
I used to work for the company that set up the clubcard scheme when it was just a guy and his wife that set it up out of their back bedroom, and was later bought outright by Tesco... my advice don't use one, that amount of data on you isn't worth an extra 7p off a can of beans every month. They analyse and sell ALL your shopping habits to EVERYONE willing to pay for it, one day they'll have coca cola in selling them it, the next pepsi will be in buying the same data on you. Stopped buying codoms this month? Next month your offers will probably be about nappies or some other baby stuff. All sold to you as doing you a favour, but in reality exploiting the f**k out of you.
#105
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
Nope. Literal example of "face like a slapped a**e".
Load More Replies... #106
Donkey boi 2 years ago
Nearest one of those is like, a 30 minute drive away. Might as well be in another country in UK travel terms.
OnlyMe 2 years ago
It got demolished - they're building a bus station there now. Sad. I remember playing space invaders there, and getting kicked out coz I was under age.
Load More Replies... Hannah M 2 years ago
These kind of names for pubs, taverns, and other such establishments, date back to when literacy was very low. Because much of the population couldn't read, it was easier to name your pub after something that could be easily and unambiguously depicted on a sign, e.g. a picture of a red lion to indicate the pub is called 'the red lion' instead of having to use words
Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
I grew up in a small village in the middle of Kent. From memory, I'm sure we had a Black Horse, White Horse, George & Dragon, Kings Arms and Railway Hotel. And this was a small village!
#107
Pat Bond 2 years ago
Pointless is better, however the prize money when compared to the chase is shockingly bad.
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#108
#109
Brooklyn Roffman 2 years ago
Well neither is that garlic you had yesterday, But it seems to be coming up a bit!
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 2 years ago
This is one of Donald Trump's tricks. I heard him describe it many years ago in an interview with Larry King.
#110
Heather Resatz 2 years ago
If you have parents that are good for you to stay with, bless you!! Do it!!
Noname 2 years ago
I grew up in a 3 generational house-with my grandparents, my parents and my siblings. Long after my grandparents died, I was living with my parents with my kids, too. I appreciated the experience of living with my grandparents in our home because they had more patience for us kids and taught us a lot of stuff from their generation that wasn't usually practiced in the modern age, ; my parents appreciated me and my kids living with them (I paid rent, bought food) because they could be with their grandkids and do the things they didn't always have the time to do with their own kids. Yes, there was some tension, but when my dad had a stroke, it was beneficial for him and my mom that I was living with them so I could do the stuff he couldn't do (repairs, property upkeep), and the presence of my toddler encouraged him to re-learn how to walk, to talk, etc. Idk why it's considered a "failure" if you still live with your parents because in history, generational households were the normal.
Mojo Flizash 2 years ago
My parents were running me out on a rail as soon as I finished high school.
Natty Tempest 2 years ago
Hahaha! Good one. Best so f... Why isnt anyone else laughing? Wait .. For real?
#112
Donkey boi 2 years ago
Scampi Fries. Great if you're eating them! Shocking if you're smelling someone who's eaten them!
Sheena Leversedge Wood 2 years ago
I still love a pack of Scampi Fries. tend to have them with a cider in the sunshine now. anyone had their rather awfully named "cheese flavoured bites" they're actually really nice too. nicer than the bacon ones they do, but you rarely see them.
Mojo Flizash 2 years ago
Scampi fries? Not so sure about that one. Kinda glad that flavor didn't cross the pond.
Mojo Flizash 2 years ago
I do want to try a J20 though. J-Twenty am I right? 😉
Load More Replies... #113
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Why do cats aim for BETWEEN your feet? You'd think that the course would be obvious for a creature which would seem to have a vested interest in not being stepped on by a creature 10 times its own size?
Load More Replies... Majungasaurus 2 years ago
I don’t think I’ve ever been chased up the stairs, but it sounds like this is a regular occurrence for some people 😂
#114
#115
Noname 2 years ago (edited)
University ruined me for films, especially all the literature classes that I took that required us to read a book and dissect the characters and plot. At this point, I can watch 10 minutes of any film and tell you all the plot twists the screenwriter thought he would surprise you with, not because I might have read the book the film might be based on but because there is a formula writers use and they're not really subtle with foreshadowing. Actually, now that I think on it more, university ruin life for me in general.
#116
Brooklyn Roffman 2 years ago
Has anyone else’s pollen allergies been acting up more than usual?
Sheena Leversedge Wood 2 years ago
and then one year, you notice that your facebook memories had you saying the same thing at the same time of year several other years, and the penny drops and you realise you've had hayfever and not realised, and just thought you had a niggly cold
#117
The Original Bruno 2 years ago (edited)
I'm starting to suspect "Belfast" is properly pronounced the same as "Gary." I love Ireland and the Irish and even their spelling, but I suspect when ancient Irish (Gaelic) was first being translated into Roman letters, someone dropped the Rosetta stone. It's like a decoder ring gone bad.
Load More Replies... Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago
I didn't understand this until I looked up the pronunciation of the name Niamh, learned something new
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Tomwncfc is actually the Irish spelling of "Thomas."
Load More Replies... Lemme get the lemons 2 years ago
If anyone doesn't get it it's because her name is pronounced neeve
Cat Chat 2 years ago
Thanks for confirming my assumption on that. Take a well deserved upvote.
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#118
Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago
The footnote "* restrictions do not apply for members of the UK Government" has been omitted from the post
User# 6 2 years ago
Not just the government, though. Remember that SNP bint that took a train from London to Glasgow knowing she tested positive?
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#119
#121
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
No, because I stop for a hot second and remember how much I hate doing laundry.
#122
ynyrhydref56 2 years ago
I take it this is about Madeleine McCann and not the precocious French schoolgirl of the cartoon. 😜 I was so confused for a second.
Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
I wouldn't be surprised if there was more than one
Load More Replies... Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
In an old house in Paris that was covered with vines, lived twelve little girls in two straight lines.
#123
Jude Corrigan 2 years ago (edited)
Percy Pig is a sweet made by M&S. They are usually in packets costing £1.30.
Load More Replies... #124
TotallyNOTaFox 2 years ago
Could have been worse - imagine being german and taking part in the contest....
#125
Kirsty 2 years ago
There's a picture of it on the 'neglected kid in the pub starter pack'. It's basically a still fruity drink in a glass bottle. Quite a few different flavors. They brought out a glittery one a while back, purple with a gold shimmer in it. Looked lovely, bit concerning when your §#|t shimmers though 😑
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The Original Bruno 2 years ago
Nice placement. Right after I wondered, "What's a J20?" in the post above. (Sorry, but the fonts didn't allow for me to think it was J-Twenty."
#126
Majungasaurus 2 years ago
Honestly I’ve been wondering this too. I’m all for the anti work movement and people not accepting jobs that pay too little, but there’s a huge sudden labour shortage in my town and I just wanna know how everyone is affording Things 😭 I work and can barely afford Things
#127
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
And here we are only halfway through 2020v3. Only six more iterations left.
#128
#130
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
Matty boy was caught on a secretly installed CCTV camera cheating on his wife. Molly-Mae is asking who set the camera up and busted him.
Load More Replies... Add New Image
Explore more of these tags
What do you think ?
Julie Snelling 2 years ago
Finally a thread where the Americans don't understand half of what is being said. I get fed up of being the one saying "I don't know what this means" or "I don't know who that is".
Jime Yeannes 2 years ago
Is this a joke? Because I am from Argentina and I understood all of them...
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Michelle Rutherford 2 years ago
I'm still laughing at the 'Birmingham' one. These are all so true #BritishLife
Julie Snelling 2 years ago
Finally a thread where the Americans don't understand half of what is being said. I get fed up of being the one saying "I don't know what this means" or "I don't know who that is".
Jime Yeannes 2 years ago
Is this a joke? Because I am from Argentina and I understood all of them...
Load More Replies... Michelle Rutherford 2 years ago
I'm still laughing at the 'Birmingham' one. These are all so true #BritishLife
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