There's no bond between two people more special than marriage. At least in the beginning. But like most special things, it slowly becomes less special with time, and before you know it you're being forced to share your pizza with a person who won't even let you use their iPhone charger, even though they always use yours. Sound familiar? Then check out this list of 2016's funniest tweets about marriage. Compiled by Bored Panda, the collection is sure to have every married person secretly nodding in agreement. Don't forget to vote for the funniest!

#1

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

GrantTanaka Report

Judy Abrams
Community Member
3 years ago

The best one.

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#2

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Celia McDaniel
Community Member
3 years ago

OMG I do this with my brother and my mom

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#3

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

charliedemers Report

Ilona Es
Community Member
3 years ago

Savage!!!

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#4

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

Six_Pack_Mom Report

Antoinette Young-Jonopulos
Community Member
3 years ago

I burst out laughing after reading this

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#5

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

usermcuserface Report

Elena Palogou
Community Member
3 years ago

Breathing "like this" is really annoying and stress inducing

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#6

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Jasmine Chen
Community Member
3 years ago

a bored one?

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#7

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

ericsshadow Report

Juana
Community Member
3 years ago

Maybe try doing your dishes and picking up your garbage before she walks in. Just a thought.

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#8

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

TheAlexNevil Report

Superluminal1
Community Member
3 years ago

But who's listening?

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#9

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

3sunzzz Report

Hannah Kobayashi
Community Member
3 years ago

this is what happens in my house but with Cats

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#10

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Devil Kitty
Community Member
3 years ago

Finally I'm not alone

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#11

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

TheCatWhisprer Report

Monica Fernandez Castillo
Community Member
3 years ago

Lol 😂😂😂

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#12

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

dafloydsta Report

Jasmine Chen
Community Member
3 years ago

That's sweet~

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#13

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

Mr_Kapowski Report

Sven
Community Member
3 years ago

It's George..

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#14

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Superluminal1
Community Member
3 years ago

Good catch!

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#15

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Thing Three
Community Member
3 years ago

Who turns down pizza?

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#16

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

imdaintyaf Report

Krystal Faborito
Community Member
3 years ago

Me as a wife XD

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#17

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

simoncholland Report

Jereme Hawkins
Community Member
3 years ago

All too true

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#18

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

iwearaonesie Report

Julia Hosack
Community Member
3 years ago

Roflmao!

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#19

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

david8hughes Report

Chanya Roye
Community Member
3 years ago

😂

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#20

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

hardlyrelevant Report

phattiusmax
Community Member
3 years ago

What? Don't they sell wolves and wolf accessories at Walmart?

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#21

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

Six_Pack_Mom Report

Quant
Community Member
3 years ago

Nest, password protected... :)

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#22

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

mel_evans Report

Fau Melo
Community Member
3 years ago

hahaha. every night.

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#23

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

david8hughes Report

Julia Hosack
Community Member
3 years ago

Lol

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#24

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Tabitha Trevino
Community Member
3 years ago

Way to include the family X)

#25

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

david8hughes Report

Superluminal1
Community Member
3 years ago

1:36 AM I understand the problem!

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#26

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

ericsshadow Report

Superluminal1
Community Member
3 years ago

He’s just fishing for compliments.

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#27

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

MUMSIEesq Report

Tabitha Trevino
Community Member
3 years ago

I hate buying toilet paper. I always buy multiple big packs. Why the dread I don't know

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#28

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

michelleames Report

Jasmine Chen
Community Member
3 years ago

they'll just ask you back

Mona Vanaki
Community Member
3 years ago

Yes exactly with "how about you"!

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Liz Miller
Community Member
3 years ago

Imagine the problem us single folks have!

Mariya Stoyanova
Community Member
3 years ago

You can always get the "whatever you decide" answer though 😄😄

Kelli Pierce
Community Member
3 years ago

All the time!!!!

Leck Goodnough
Community Member
3 years ago

Just say what you want! For God's sake!

Glenys Stone
Community Member
3 years ago

I ask, he always replies with "what have you got?", or "whatever is easiest!"

Carrie Salazar
Community Member
3 years ago

Accurate.

John Ashley
Community Member
3 years ago

Not a good idea if you happen to be the one who has to make it. You make it, you get to choose.

DancingToMyself
Community Member
3 years ago

You just order something, who cares

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#29

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

iwearaonesie Report

Elaina Moss
Community Member
3 years ago

Sounds like a drinking fun married time!

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#30

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Sreejith
Community Member
3 years ago

experience man.... experience...... B-)

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#31

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Leck Goodnough
Community Member
3 years ago

That's right!

#32

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

GrantTanaka Report

Susanna Vesna
Community Member
3 years ago

God Im so happy my boyfriend is an amazing cook! <3

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#33

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

KalvinMacleod Report

Alicia Stellmacher
Community Member
3 years ago

I'm dying that the cat is sticking it's tongue out! 😂

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#34

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

TheCatWhisprer Report

BobbyK
Community Member
3 years ago

First, she was always TOO hot. Window open - 20 degrees - I freeze. Now she is TOO cold. Thermostat set to boiling. I melt. Ain't love grand?!

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#35

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Nikki Mau
Community Member
3 years ago

Touché lol

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#36

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

wife_housy Report

Anastasiya Winogradova
Community Member
3 years ago

His laptop is always blinking through my eyelids!! :)))

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#37

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

LeBearGirdle Report

Dracule Mihawk
Community Member
3 years ago

Ha ha smart ass.

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#38

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

moooooog35 Report

Judy Freeman
Community Member
3 years ago

But she's right!

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#39

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

WorkingMom86 Report

Tracy Baparam
Community Member
3 years ago

So glad I'm not the only one with this struggle, Every Freaking Day!

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#40

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

TheCatWhisprer Report

#41

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

bourgeoisalien Report

BobbyK
Community Member
3 years ago

or fart...

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#42

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Sreejith
Community Member
3 years ago

anyway you collected all of those to one place... Good work fella

#43

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Teresa Brush
Community Member
3 years ago

Lmao

#44

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

iwearaonesie Report

Jonathan Lollis
Community Member
3 years ago

Death over an I told you so? Seriously?

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#45

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

moooooog35 Report

Jörg Zingler
Community Member
3 years ago

Poor dog :(

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#46

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

sarcasticmommy4 Report

JELollis
Community Member
3 years ago

My lord, the accuracy of this...

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#47

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

pazarm Report

Kristina
Community Member
3 years ago

goals

#48

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

ian_mendes Report

Shari H
Community Member
3 years ago

And then the person who finally realizes the trash is at max capacity getting mad that the other person didn't take it out sooner. 20+ years of successful marriage here folks, still pushing down the garbage...

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#49

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Cassie
Community Member
3 years ago

I pick the brand of TP. My hubby either approves of my choice or doesn't care as long as he has something to wipe his bottom with. Not sure which it is, but it's probably the latter.

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#50

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

DrMikeLloyd Report

Jasmine Chen
Community Member
3 years ago

could also used as me and mom.

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#51

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

heyevergreen Report

Tali Barak
Community Member
3 years ago

foodporn...yess

#52

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

KalvinMacleod Report

Tiny Dynamine
Community Member
3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This no of the sense it makes.

#53

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

WilliamRodgers Report

Tali Barak
Community Member
3 years ago

good one:)

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#54

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

simoncholland Report

Superluminal1
Community Member
3 years ago

That's the spirit!

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#55

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

TheCatWhisprer Report

Krystal Faborito
Community Member
3 years ago

Accurate

#56

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

VictorPopeJr Report

Anita Rapp
Community Member
3 years ago

Took me a second...sometimes 'Y'.

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#57

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

londonsma Report

Jim Henderson
Community Member
3 years ago

All jokes aside, I dated a guy like this

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#58

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Serena R.
Community Member
3 years ago

It was in the fine print 😌

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#59

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Abbie Smith
Community Member
3 years ago

Was telling my husband this, I just gave him the stare for the wife blank, he thought he honestly did something wrong xD

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#60

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

XplodingUnicorn Report

Anna Versace
Community Member
3 years ago

Yes! Yes! Yes!

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#61

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

iwearaonesie Report

over opinionated
Community Member
3 years ago

*Sets Wal-Mart alarm clocks to go off in one minute intervals ten minutes from now. Waits and watches a safe distance away.*

#62

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

david8hughes Report

over opinionated
Community Member
3 years ago

Lmao. How excited the hubby gets when he wins a $50 pro-line (Ontario Canada sports lottery)

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#63

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

LurkAtHomeMom Report

Quant
Community Member
3 years ago

Women...

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#64

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

Mr_Kapowski Report

Elaina Moss
Community Member
3 years ago

Oh yea...oh hey, did you need help with that? No, I got it now...that it's done...

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#65

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

Rlpihl Report

JillVille Child Care
Community Member
3 years ago

If all those boxes contain costumes, I want that basement! Oh the fun we could have!!

#66

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

yoyoha Report

Jamie Heatly
Community Member
3 years ago

Haha I like this one!

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#67

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

sarcasticmommy4 Report

Jennifer Swanson
Community Member
3 years ago

Hahahahahahaha! That's awesome!

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#68

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

TwoSapphiresBlu Report

over opinionated
Community Member
3 years ago

Men like when you're around but not in there way. They hate being alone but don't bother them... especially during play offs.

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#69

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

iwearaonesie Report

Jörg Zingler
Community Member
3 years ago

Vute dinosaur?

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#70

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

LurkAtHomeMom Report

Hoser
Community Member
3 years ago

Description is wonderfully put!

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#71

Funniest Marriage Tweets 2016

ericsshadow Report

Steve Moore
Community Member
3 years ago

Ever try to convince your beloved that , contrary to his/her misapprehension, there are TWO a's in "caramel" ? Really gets up my nose when I hear "carmel."