If you’re into some classic jokes, then we do have a selection for you! Reading this list with your mother might not be the best idea (unless she’s an absolute menace and has some legendary-tier yo-mama jokes up her sleeve.) Yet, there are a lot of occasions when they will count as adult-only jokes, so tread carefully. However, if you have friends you know will love these, crack away!
While some people won’t find yo-mama jokes funny, there is also a group of people who crave some stomach-twirling two-liners. It’s hard to adapt these short jokes in a casual conversation. But if you do, it often turns into a competition to see who has the absolute best yo-mama jokes.
Some of these lines can be offensive but as is with taste, there can be a lot of opinions about it. So keep your mind open and remember, these are just funny jokes meant to pull your moods up, not down.
Dig in and prepare for this collection of the best yo-mama roasts on the planet. Vote for your favorites, expand your arsenal, and show your friends the winning roasts on the globe!
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Yo mama's so fat, when God said, “Let there be light,” he asked her to move out of the way.
"oh sorry can you move a lil bit to the right... now crouch down.... uhmmmm.... lay on the ground? now the plants can have light... nvm you squished them all-forget it
Yo mama's so stupid when they said it was chilly outside, she grabbed a bowl.
Yo mama's so old, she walked out of a museum and the alarm went off.
Yo mama's so old, she knew Burger King when he was a prince.
When you hear a sentence starting with “yo mama…”, you might feel that a situation is about to turn from bad to worse. However, if you are a connoisseur of the ‘Your Dear Maman’ joke, you might have an inkling that a very well-thought-out and creative insult is about to see the light of day. In an even better case, you might hear a yo-mama joke so good that it’ll knock you out of your socks, blow your hair out, and leave you browless for the rest of your life.
Yo mama's so short, you can see her feet on her driver's license.
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a scale and it said: "To be continued."
Yo mama so fat, when se checked her weight at the doctors clinic, doctor said, " I want to kno your weight, not your phone number "
Yo mama's so ugly, she walked into a Haunted House and walked back out with a job application.
Yo mama's so fat, when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.
You might think that the “your mom” jokes originated somewhere in the past, together with the ‘90s comedies. However, there is indeed just one person responsible for creating this kind of corny joke. Would you be surprised if we told you it was the OG jokester William Shakespeare?
Yo mama’s so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.
Yo mama's so fat, she was overthrown by a small militia group, and now she's known as the Republic of Yo Mama.
Yo mama's so fat, when she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Well, he did, and you can find the original “your mother” joke in Act 1 Scene 1 of Timon of Athens, where a character implies that his enemy’s Maman is, in fact, a female dog. So, the next time you feel the urge to use a “yer ma” joke, remember that it is a language tool created by only the most excellent writer ever. And there's no shame in joking around in the same way as he did!
Yo mama's so stupid, she returned a doughnut because it had a hole in it.
Yo mama's so fat, a vampire sucked her blood and got diabetes.
Yo mama’s so dumb, it takes her an hour to cook minute rice.
Yo mama’s so old, her birth certificate says expired on it.
Yo mama’s so fat she takes selfies in panoramic mode.
Yo mama’s so fat, the last time she wore a Red Cross t-shirt, a helicopter tried to land in her.
This joke was better when the Red Cross T-Shirt was a Malcolm X jacket lol
Yo mama's so old that when she was in school, there was no history class.
that would be great if i was yo mama because history calss was the worst when i went to school
Yo mama so big, her belt size is "equator."
Yo mama's so poor, she chases the garbage truck with a grocery list.
Yo mama's armpits are so hairy, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is one.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
Yo mama's so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses Google Earth to take a selfie.
We should all those overweight chicks who have their own TV shows to pick a spot in a neighborhood and take a pic standing right behind the curb ha ha
Yo mama’s so fat, she goes to the car wash to take showers.
Yo mama’s so old, her driver’s license got hieroglyphics on it.
Yo mama’s so fat she had to have her baptism at sea world.
Yo mama so scary, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Yo mama's so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.
Yo mama's so dumb, she put a watch in a piggybank and said she was saving time.
Yo mama's so dumb, when she heard about cookies on the Internet, she ate her computer.
Yo mama's so ugly, she turned Medusa to stone.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow when she smiles at traffic, it slows down.
Yo mama's so stupid when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting "Wait, you forgot the remote!"
Yo mama's so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Yo mama's so ugly, when your dad drops her off for work, he gets a fine for littering.
Yo mama's so stupid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner - and she looked.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put airbags on her computer in case it crashed.
Yo mama's so stupid, it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
Yo mama's so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for fries and a shake.
Yo mama's so stupid, she stared at a cup of orange juice for 12 hours because it said "concentrate."
Yo mama's so fat, if she was a Star Wars character, her name would be Admiral Snackbar.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't even jump to a conclusion.
Yo mama's so fat, I swerved to miss her and my car and ran out of gas.
Yo mama's so lazy she woke up from a coma and went to sleep.
Yo mama's so fat, when she got hit by a bus she asked, “Who threw that rock?”
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.
Funny story, one of my baby teeth had to get filled in twice, and it had a blueish color after. I was sad when I lost it
Yo mama’s so big, when she talks to herself it’s a long-distance call.
Ur mom is so fat that the sun has nothing on her after thanksgiving
Yo mama’s so fat, if she got her shoes shined, she’d have to take his word for it.
Yo mama’s house is so small that when she orders a large pizza, she has to go outside to eat it.
Yo mama’s so fat, she doesn't have a circumference. She has an event horizon.
Yo mama's so fat, the sorting hat put her in the house of pancakes.
Yo mama's so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in the grocery store and starved to death.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.
Yo mama's so lazy, she has a stay-at-home job and still is late to work.
Yo mama's so dumb, when the doctor told her she had coronavirus, she bought a new laptop.
Yo mama's so sweet she takes her coffee without sugar.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was little, she had to trick-or-treat by phone.
Yo mama's so nice... she works 3 jobs and still makes time for you.
Your mama's so fat, on a scale from one to ten, she's a 747.
Yo mama's so fat, every time she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
I have an idea for a yo mama joke: Yo mama's so fat that she collapsed into a supermassive black hole
Yo mama’s so fat that the probability of her being in any arbitrary point in space is 1.
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter.