You've probably heard of the notoriously funny British sense of humor, or American comedy that cracks everyone up laughing, from visitors of the famous comedy cellars to viewers of legendary sitcoms like Seinfield and Friends.
But many may not be familiar with the Scottish sense of humor, something an entire corner of Reddit with 766k members has dedicated itself to. Named Scottish People Twitter, the subreddit is a place for some of the hilarious things Scots have posted online, and it's pure comedy gold we didn’t know we needed.
“Scots generally have a dark, dry, and direct sense of humor," Veloglasgow, the moderator of the community, told Bored Panda sometime ago. So it’s virtually impossible not to like it! More Scottish People Twitter gems can be found in our previous features here and here.
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I Also Want A Latte With Oat Milk
Chaotic Good
International Decorators In Glasgow!
"Scots generally have a dark, dry, and direct sense of humor," Veloglasgow, the Reddit user and moderator of the ScottishPeopleTwitter subreddit, told us a while ago. He added that "Observational comedy where someone points out something that everyone accepts as day-to-day reality but which would be absurd to an outside observer also goes down well." However, not all posts make it to the sub’s feed. "Most posts that make it through the mod queue are representative, any posts that use 'fooken' or 'fecking' for fu*ken/fu*king are generally removed as no Scot hears how we say those words as that way phonetically," the moderator explained.
Something Something Blitz Spirit
oh how the turntables. reminds me of the american version, like how the people making fake vaccine cards hate undocumented immigrants
Some Festive Cheer From This Auld Yin
That's beautiful. I'm going to do that once the little freeloaders I gave birth to start making their own five dollar bills.
Fair Dos
wow and they must be well-versed in their culture to know his name was stephen and not phteven!!!!!
Meanwhile, Larry Dean, a Scottish stand-up comedian, believes that defining “Scottish” comedy is a really tough question. “First off, there’s the assumption that a nationally shared sense of humor exists at all,” he said and added “Is it really possible for five million people to make the same kind of jokes and find the same things funny?”
Dean continued: “if there’s one thing we Scottish like to laugh at, it’s ourselves. Which is useful when facing internationally reinforced caricatures every time we turn on the telly. (Think of Groundskeeper Willie from The Simpsons.)"
The Best Of Scottish Hospitality And Japanese Alcohol
20% Struggle With The Question
Finding It Hard To Know Who To Believe With This Vaccine Carry On
It is mindboggling that so many people would rather believe a Whatsapp post than actual scientists.
The novelist Jenny Colgan argues that there are two views of Scottish humor. “The first, to quote PG Wodehouse, is that it is seldom difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman and a ray of sunshine. Think Gordon Brown's overhanging manse brow, and Lars von Trier's Breaking the Waves. The Presbyterian suspicion about things that are comical, musical, or in any way distract you from 12 hours a day of back-breaking toil runs deep in the national psyche - what Irvine Welsh calls the 'you'll have had your tea' school of grumpy inhospitableness,” she explained in a piece for The Guardian.
You Absolute Prawn
Amateur! You don't even need the appendix....let's us know when you kill a kidney or a liver...lol
Dalek In The Windae Too
"In Ye Get, Carol. Get Yersel Up The Road Safe Now. Mind And Give Me Two Rings When You And Billy Are Back Home
Fair Enough
Colgan continued that there is the other side too: the belief that Scots actually have a great sense of humor “(because it is free - yes, yes, ho ho ho).” She wrote: “And this view is probably the more accurate. Without a doubt the free-ranging Glaswegian barrowlands native wit is alive and well - at a recent concert by the Blue Nile, the famously beautiful and gloomy Glaswegian bedsit band, the heckle went up, ‘Could youse no' play something a bit mair wistful?’”
Here Fishy Fishy
A Wee Thing That Floats In The Sea
Angus Getting Straight To The Point
Good Rationing There
Pure Inspirational
"...and two deaths..." -make that three. I'm going to throw a clot if I don't stop laughing unreasonably hard at this.
Big Nicola Laying Down The Law For Eid
Canny Believe This Hasny Been Posted
"Who's the cat stuck in the door now Linda? Huh? Who's the cat now?"
Do I Sense A Netflix Original In The Works?
Scrapping With Peter Pan
Service Please!
The Rare, Understandable Scottish Men
While Having A Pish
Sorry Pal
It’s Dracula
Great way to try to lead us off your trail Dracula....we know he was right!
She Has A Point
Sanjeev Kohli On Boris Johnson's Baby
Everybody Smuggled Food In Years Ago
Someone From Shell Energy Obviously Doesn't Know Who Irvine Welsh Is
Let It Snow
Merry Christmas
Never Let Anyone Tell Ye It Cannae Be Done
Need To Stay Pawsitive
I always enjoy reading these with a Scottish accent in my head, it's 100 times more hilarious.
On Brand
Does This Qualify?
As long as they're prepared for the very much not LA weather they'll be grand
It’s Chappy
How About Some Burnt Tae F**k Rolls?
That had to be a marketing strategy after someone accidentally burned all the rolls.
It's A Slow Burner
Sometimes They Are Not Funny
Mould Juice
Well honestly it's probably easier to get people to take penicillin than a good old dose of mold juice
Time And A Plaice For Fish Jokes
Totie Airmed Dinosaurs
Cute
Fitba Crazy
The All Shitting Eye?
The Tooth Fairy Does Exist Though!
Personally I Wouldn’t Have That
My printer has been saying it's nearly out on toner since about 5 minutes after I changed it - it's been months so canon are officially at it
As If The Teachers Don't Have Enough Tae Get On Wae
My friend in elementary school had a bladder infection and the teacher wouldn't let her go to the bathroom so the poor girl urinated all over herself and was called "pee girl" for 5 yrs till we got to middle school. I'm still angry at that teacher for her
Historical Covid Tweet
Just Needs A Baby On The Ceiling Chandelier To Complete The Look
Tap B**ch
120 Questions
Limmy's Twitter Is Pure Poetry
Of all the things that they sensor it's okay to print "spunk into the mold" LOL. I know it's not technically cussing but they sensor *death *F***y and *k**b
Oh The Glesga Banter
Aw that's so much cuter than hearing someone say 'stop your crying c**t'
Don’t Worry Troops, Kevin’s Fixed It
Nae Sense Ae Humour
She Was Lucky
Wit U Smiling At
Baltic
Was snow/hailstones where I am yesterday. Today a lovely sunny but cool day. Tomorrow, who knows
Gerrit Up Ye
Translation Already Provided; England Bashing Included
List Of Dundeeisms My Grandma’s Brother Sent Her In The 1950s After She Moved To NY So She Could Keep Up Her Accent
Invented A Lot Mair Than That
Fish 1: So what if we do this with our parts? Fish 2: Woah...can we even do that? Is it allowed? Fish 1: I don't see why not. Fish 2: We can't be the first to think of this right?
Aye Mate? Lifted A Plywood Floor This Morning In Livingston This Morning Have Ye? Realised Its Dry Rot Underneath It Have Ye? Bulls**t Ya Grouse
Whit The F**k Man, The Bots Are Takin Over
Was Even Better Before They Took The Sugar Out
I must confess, I'm a sugar free bru drinker, but in my defence my mum is a diabetic so we always had that, now I can't stomach drinks with actual sugar. Much prefer the cancer causing artificial sweeteners - yummy
New Class Structure For Drug Dealers Revealed In Scotland, This Ones Defo Upper Class
Seems like historic Scotland have been holding back some members perks from me
Every Single Year
Lost Má Pasport
Not been to polo in forever, was always great gossiping with the lady with her potions and lollipops in the toilet
Ye Micht As Weel Be Makin Salad
Away An' F**k Off Back Tae Azkaban
Had to do some digging, kid claimed to be medically exempt from wearing a face mask - if my 5yr old can sit underneath a 13tog duvet for hours at a time watching crap on his iPad then I think kids can manage with a thin mask over their gub
Those Wee Radge Campers Leaving Their Bags Aboot The Place!
Rip Sasha
Yer Maw’s Maw. Ken?
My two oldest kids have a Welsh dad and his parents are English and Welsh - so they have a grandma and taid
How To Piss Off A Scottish Person
I wish I could spend a summer in Scotland. If anyone wants me, they can join me for a season of their choice with my 8 cats in the Mojave Desert.
Summer in Scotland is a handful of days in July/August...that's your lot.
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How difficult is it for them to actually type this out? Can they install a Scottish dictionary that autocorrects certain words, or at least accepts the Scottish spelling with voice texting?
Probably not any more difficult than it is for us to substitute slang for standard English, like "gonna" for "going to."
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I wish I could spend a summer in Scotland. If anyone wants me, they can join me for a season of their choice with my 8 cats in the Mojave Desert.
Summer in Scotland is a handful of days in July/August...that's your lot.
Load More Replies... How difficult is it for them to actually type this out? Can they install a Scottish dictionary that autocorrects certain words, or at least accepts the Scottish spelling with voice texting?
Probably not any more difficult than it is for us to substitute slang for standard English, like "gonna" for "going to."
Load More Replies... 
