30 People Share Social Norms That They Find Weird, Make A Lot Of Hilariously Valid Points
Social norms are informal rules that govern behavior in groups and societies. They touch almost every aspect of our lives.
Academics like to use this comparison to explain the concept: just as grammar is a set of regulations that governs the structure and organization of language, social norms regulate the structure and organization of people, and, again, just as grammar shapes how we communicate and understand language, social norms shape how we behave and interact with others.
Sociologists talk about social norms motivating people to act, economists explore how they influence market behavior, and legal scholars view them as alternatives to laws, and while their words make sense, if we deconstruct these systems enough, they can begin to look silly.
Recently, Reddit user Irish-Springs made a post on the platform, asking people to share what social norm they find pretty weird when they think about it, and it has already received over 5,300 comments, many of which raise some hilariously valid points.
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People's absolute horror about women breastfeeding in public.
Oh, I am sorry, Karen. I am giving my baby substance, not trying to attract your 12 year old son.
Paying tens of thousands of dollars to bury corpses in the ground.
My wife knows my wishes: dig a hole, toss me in, bury me with a young oak tree on top. Done.
People expect you to get along with family (parents, siblings) even if they treat you like s**t.
The expectation of tipping for certain jobs, as a substitute for paying employees a higher wage.
When I was a kid tipping was meant only for for waiters/waitresses and petrol attendants (we don't 'pump our own gas' - now it's drivers, delivery peers, shop assistants, hair dressing assistants, literally any assistant, any service provider, and their mom. It's crazy. I can't afford to tip everyone damn.
Showing excessive gratuitous violence is fine, and will get you at most a PG-13 rating, which most people will think is too strict anyways. But show even one uncovered booby and people will lose their minds.
Circumcision is pretty wild. Cosmetic surgery on the genitals of a baby is pretty weird.
Women’s pants don’t have pockets.
i wear men’s jeans for that reason. and that my legs are really long and they’re comfortable for me sooooo
I actually really like women's jeans for some reason, but the pockets are ridiculous. My mini pocket goes deeper than normal women's pockets.
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No s**t. I vary from 8 - 14. What in the cubic non pocket is this s**t?
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Most women's clothing that comes without adequate pockets were/are both designed and created by....women. This depends entirely on where you get your clothes, though. All of my jeans, pants, shorts, even some skirts, have pockets (and not tiny ones). People buy the clothing without adequate pockets, then complain about not having pockets, lol. Well, buy stuff that has them, stop buying the stuff that doesn't and the people who make and design that c**p will stop. Excluding expensive designers who don't care one iota about function or how many people buy their stuff, lol. They go for the whole idea of "less purchases equals exclusivity equals higher cost equals more popular equals we're the best"...it's weird.
There's not always a lot of options... which is why I learned how to add pockets to whatever I want! 😃
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I bought a denim jacket, and all the pockets were sewn up! I undid them all. Why have pockets if you can't use them?
i would have messed up so bad on that lol. good job getting those pockets open! it’s so stupid that they were even sewn up in the first place
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My dad asked me why I never put my phone in my pocket and I told him I couldn't even fit half my hand in them, much less a cell phone.
How can this be explained by anything but women not choosing to buy clothing with pockets? It would stand to reason that if women really chose function over form, the clothing items that had pockets would always be sold out, and the industry would respond, no?
I fit in kids stuff so I get kids pants that have pockets but then I ask myself - what is so important that a child has pockets over an adult female
i find it too uncomfortable to put everything that i would carry in my purse into pockets, and i am a minimalist when it comes to what i carry in my purse. too many weird and uncomfortable bulges in my jeans. purses just make more sense to me.
. . . the result, women put down men who wear cargo shorts. I don't design the pants, lady.
Don't they have a special vacuum that sucks all the air out of their pants so that are tight and show off their figure? It is not about function, it is about maintaining the "image".
Ladies stop buying ladies pants. I promise you will look just as good in mens jeans and they have pockets.
Like why the palm tree why?! What are we supposed to do? Hold our phone in our hand?!
Women's clothing generally doesn't have proper functioning pockets because otherwise, we would buy handbags if we had pockets?
What I meant was if we had functioning pockets we wouldn't buy handbags...
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Again, and again, and again, and again, women complaining that women's clothes don't have pockets. But I am 100% certain that if I create women clothes with pockets, no woman will ever buy them.
That's on you women. Bad fashion designs are on the designer but bad fashion designs continuing to be a popular thing is because consumers purchase them. I guarantee you if women went one year not buying anything without pockets, fashion designers would be "INSPIRED" to create DARING new designs with pockets.
Nonsense. So that would be one year without buying any clothing at all. Not going to happpen
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Yup. Women don't need car keys, since their husband drives. They don't need à wallet, since their husband pays for anything they need. They don't need à phone since their husband has one. They don't need ID, since they're only an extension of their husband.../s
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The absurd obsession the US has with the flag and the "reverence" surrounding it. It's a godsdammed piece of fabric. Actually, US patriotism as a whole.
Grand gesture marriage proposals in public are embarrassing and weird.
It can be quite romantic and memorable. But if you're going to go big, you DEFINITELY need to know how your partner will respond beforehand to save yourself from being shot down on the spot because of embarassment.
Working your a*s off for 65 years to then live for 10 years.
Sending hungry kids to school and not feeding them for free.
The topic of sex being generally taboo despite the fact that it is the reason we’re all here and that a majority of people love it.
It is quite acceptable to see pple getting gunned down or stabbed to death, but show one female nipple and the movie is for 16 years and older cause apperantly kids minds are too frail to deal with that.
Bikinis vs bras. If you bra is made out of swimwear fabric, suddenly new social rules apply.
It's about intent and consent. In a bikini you're intending to be outside and consenting to be seen in that manner of dress. Bras, besides sports bras, are generally worn with the intent of not being seen, and unless the wearer reveals it themselves, they are not consenting to be seen in that article of clothing.
Forcing people in their teens to decide on a career with the implication that they'll do it for the rest of their life and sealing the deal by putting them into so much debt studying for said career that they're pretty much enslaved to it.
Working 40 hours a week. It’s actually insane that we all put up with it.
Education should be fully free across the board. It makes 0 sense that a country would impoverish their own people rather than invest in a strong, educated and healthy population.
The ONLY reason that university costs money is to perpetuate social stratification. You could probably take 5% of the military budget and it would more than cover it.
Also, isn’t that what “free market” people always b***h about? That once people are rich they will give back and trickle down? Tax the 1% sell slightly more and you would have it paid for.
Germany has free education. It works just fine.
If you are smart and ambitious enough to attend a university, it should be fully state sponsored. The only reason people are against this, is that some kids who grew up rich and didn’t have to take out a mortgage to enter the rat race are jealous they don’t get to keep their advantage.
Women can show their whole breast just not the nipples.
Women can't show nippels, because MEN could get "inpure thoughts", according to fundamentalist "Christian" leaders. They like to spout their disapproval all over the internet, which is full of pørn. And the most watched pørn in the US is GAY pørn...
Encouraging people to drink more alcohol. I'm guilty of it myself, 'go on, just one more!' Or I've bought shots for people who have said no, which then pressures them to drink it.
I didn't see a problem with it until I saw a guy taking the p**s out of another guy for drinking alcohol free beer. Imagine being ok with being pressured to take drugs? It's madness when I think about it.
Forcing or encouraging a child to hug a family member that has known them since their birth but the child doesn't have any sort of bond with said family member.
Asking a grown woman's father for her hand in marriage. What?
Everybody hates being sung happy birthday and everybody hates singing happy birthday, so what the hell are we doing here?
I like it, it's sweet. I moved to another country by myself and the people I thought were friends never visited or anything. My best friend (not nearby at all) facetimes me with her kid and sing me happy birthday, then her husband pops his head in and says happy birthday. I truly felt love when they did that and I haven't felt that in a long while. To respond to other commenters: it's not always about being the center of attention.
Fireworks on the 4th of July. We celebrate independence by showering our land with expensive toxic chemicals from China.
You can't use swear words on TV, radio, or in movies under PG-13; but you learn most of the swear words that exist by middle school. What's the point?
Caring what another person wears or what they look like.
I have a medical condition called lipoedema, which means that although I'm not overweight going by BMI, my legs are disproportionately large compared to the rest of me. I can guarantee that a total stranger will comment on it about 50% of the time I'm out and about. Its usually in the supermarket, and its usually some ignorant old woman telling me my ankles are swollen, or asking me directly about it, or making a rude comment about me needing to lose weight so my legs aren't so fat. What makes people think a rude comment about someone's appearance will be welcome? Do they think before opening their ignorant mouths? The next old biddy who comments is getting shoved in the freezer with the fish fingers.
Not going to a restaurant by yourself.
I am on a business trip, I want to eat somewhere nice, drink some wine, dine nice since the company is paying for that stuff, I didn't bring anyone because its my arrival night or I just want to have a moment for myself.
And then I get treated like I have a leprosy, or the waiter tries to strong-arm me to go to the communal area or patio to eat because then I would have some company from the random patrons.
Ex Hotelier and Michelin Chef here ; If any of my staff (or me, when I was training) treated a lone diner with anything less than the utmost courtesy and kindness, they would have (and have) been taken to one side and told the error of their ways. For example, I used to have a delightful chap used to come in probably once a month with his wife for a couple of years, then started coming in by himself as his Wife had died of Cancer ; one of my new waiters made a comment along the lines of 'what a sad old git, coming in by himself ...etc'. My Sous Chef made him see the error of his ways (basically gave him a light thumping) and he left the next day. The elderly gentleman ate there regularly for the next 3 years before succumbing to Alzheimers.
Asking people how they're doing as a matter of courtesy when you truly don't care and are hoping they just say "good hbu" in response.
This is mostly just an American thing. Many of my Euro friends hear about this and are confused when they hear this and then actually start to say how they are or what's going on.
Balloons. Here's a plastic sack of my breath. Happy birthday.
Helium balloons are better than your own breath. Plus it makes your voice all weird. :)
I could give you a pretty detailed list. But I think one of the most weird and detrimental to society is beauty standards and impossible looks and body types.
Everything is cool within reasonable limits. Not trying to be a Barbie is absolutely fine. Saying that a woman weighing 200 kilos is beautiful and shaming another woman for losing weight is absolutely not fine. Obesity is not healthy and not beautiful. Anorexy is not healthy and not beautiful.
LAWNS!!!!! ornamental grasses leech nitrogen from the soil while trapping almost no carbon. And then people spend time and money keeping their grass healthy, only to spend more time and money cutting it down when it does what healthy plants do ie: GROW
Meanwhile there's perfectly available varieties of clover that make great ground cover, grow to be less than an inch tall, and that actively sequester nitrogen deep into the topsoil.
I feel like a crazy person because nobody else seems to even notice the problem.
I’m right there with you. Death to lawns and all the gasoline burned and noise made to maintain them!
It's baffling that only one gender is expected to wear make up and the other is discouraged. Just makes less sense the more that I think about it.
Getting really upset that sports team didn't win at sports game.
And conversely, getting too emotionally involved when the team you support do win. Jerry Seinfeld had a great line on this: "We won, we won! No, they won, you watched"
I feel like too many people talk on speakerphone. Do you remember when conversations were private?
Women being expected to legally change their last name for marriage.
Even more than that, it wasn't all that long ago that a woman would be referred to by her husband's name rather than by her first name e.g. "Mrs John Smith"
Women's shoes. I am a man btw but I had this argument with my wife, I told her women's shoes were impractical, uncomfortable, many of them like heels are very bad but flat ones are also just as awful and just damn right pointless. Eventually, when i explain with most Men's shoes they are comfortable and robust and a little bit of rain doesn't soak them she suddenly went 'yea they are s**t' but said that's what we wear. Literally, a social construction for women to wear s**t shoes.
They're not pointless. Just the opposite. Pointy tips that squeeze your toes till they hurt.
I can’t think of a single reason for ties being the standard for business attire other than it’s a reminder to everyone in the room that you could be easily strangled at any time.
Acquiring debt as soon as you’re an adult whether it be student loans, buying a car, or signing up for credit cards.
Elbows on the table is apparently rude.
Shame they're often *exactly* the right height to rest my elbows on.
Purses seem super useful. Why are men seemingly universally afraid to carry one of their own?
Suppressing emotions = “strength”.
I was born in 1952 and was raised by my family that men did not express emotions. That is so wrong, but still today have a difficult time.
Having listening devices hooked up to the internet in most homes.
They are no more of a risk than your mobile phone, and in fact the device stays put in one room, whilst you tend to take your phone into every room with you - including the bedroom. Knowing how "home assistants" work, I'm not in the least bothered by mine. They don't start recording until they hear their "wakeword" - everything stays local until then. You can even review the audio clip that was sent if your really want to.
Blowing out birthday candles - basically blowing your germs all over cake you’re sharing with others.
But if its family and very close friends, you'll have similar bacterial colonisation anyway.
Gen Z using various apps to keep tabs on the location of all their friends. They've literally normalized stalking. Then they flip out when someone turns off their location.
Having Constitutional rights when the justice system does not recognize them.
Taking photos of your food and sharing it to strangers who don't care. Most of social media posts are just a waste of time, people mindlessly just click like and move on.
Disagree. I take photos for myself and share them (along with recipes or where I got it). I like food, looking at things I made and were proud of reminds me of that positive feeling. Same with a vacations (memories) and eating out (share local eateries). Man, this person thinks everyone thinks like them. No my dude, no.
How domestic violence against a woman is seen as awful, but when it happens to a man it's funny.
Posting about others' lives on social media, I guess. Or maybe it just annoys me that apparently, I(a legal adult) am not in command of my own privacy because my mom wants to publicize things about me at her seriously misunderstanding discretion.
Then you need to have a really f*****g serious conversation with your mum.
Bringing a tree in your house once a year to celebrate the birth of a magical carpenter from two thousand years ago.
Acknowledging other peoples sneezes. I’m done with it.
We have a rule in our house, the 1st sneeze is acknowledged, after that, you're on your own.
Garter toss is weird.
Consuming milk from other animals and it is totally normal but mention consuming human milk by a non infant and you are crazy.
Uniforms at work and I'm talking retail spaces. IMO Lowes has the right idea with a simple vest that says "I work here" but you can wear pants or shorts and a t-shirt so long as it isn't offensive. Some freedom of expression helps in the day to day. Saying it's gotta be our shirt (usually polo) and dress slacks is stupid and society doesn't really give a s**t .
hmm no I appreciate retail uniforms it makes it much easier to spot staff who can help. I agree uniforms elsewhere are pointless.
Shaking hands (at least in America).
It’s gross. Most people have terrible hygiene or hand washing skills.
Unless you've been handling raw meat or decided to wipe your äss with your hand instead of toilet paper, your hands are probably cleaner than you think they are. Shaking hands is normal and there's nothing weird about it. Chill out.
Getting small gifts for friends/family after a trip or vacation. At least for me this puts me in a perpetual state of giving and receiving gifts neither party wants so we just end up wasting money.
Sure, if you're living a transactional based life I can see why you would think that. But giving a gift doesn't create a transaction. A souvenir or small gift is saying, I saw this and it reminded me of you; Remember when we did whatever? Check this out I saw it and it reminded me of that day. No reciprocation necessary.
All these random “rules” about texting people. Texting is supposed to be a medium to talk to people and they can respond at their own convenience.
Instead it’s turned into a puzzle of deciphering how long messages should be, how long should I wait before replying, do I double text them or not, did they read my message, why did they leave me on read, list goes on and on…
Cards.
I'm just giving Hallmark money in exchange for a piece of paper that someone's going to look at for about 10 seconds and then completely forget about.
Really depends on the circumstances and the recipient. Before my hands got worse, I used to enjoy writing letters and cards in fancy calligraphy. My grandma and elderly relatives used to love and treasure them. It meant so much that someone had taken the time and effort to send them something so personal. eCards and their like have their place but just don't have the same emotional impact.
Needing the governments permission to be together and then also to break up.
Financial - wrongly taxes r cheaper for married people than singles. Huge need for that to be changed. Not necessary to explain the divorce finances
Open casket funerals. I know it helps some people with closure, but I'd just rather not.
I know people who took a picture (and framed it, and displayed it in the wall) of dead relatives in their coffins. Very disturbing to me, but I was told it's tradition. Nah sorry, I prefer to remember them when they were alive.
Having culturally pre-approved style options based solely around gender.
i hate dresses. i wear suits for formal things. i have short hair. it looks kinda like the boy emoji. i’m a woman. i get made fun of and yelled at in public for that but you wanna know the best part? i don’t care what they say. i like me and i’m going to wear what i want, get over it Karen.
One day my husband and I were getting groceries and we needed more litter for our cat's litterbox, and then I had a thought.
How weird is it that we have to buy special dirt for our cat to poop in?
Go to a automotive shop, and buy a 100lbs bag of grit for absorbing oil. It's exactly the same stuff, and costs the same as 10lbs of kitty litter in the supermarket
Everything considered drinking culture.
At first I wanted to mention the normalizing of casual interaction with AI companions and how dating Eva AI in your smartphone becomes socially acceptable as a social status, but we have a much simpler thing to remind. We've already created a dominant culture of self-intoxication and skill of going wasted *in an appropriate way*. That itself is so weird that all modern-day innovations seem negligible in comparison.
In the US, some jobs pay overtime and some don’t.
Join a union! One of the best ways to get better pay and perks!
Holding the door open for someone perfectly capable behind you so they feel compelled to speed up to not inconvenience you from holding it for too long.
Clapping. We show appreciation by smacking our hands together to make a noise.
u/luvinthemiddle added:
High-fiveing yourself for someone else's accomplishments!
If I took everything I read on this website seriously I'd lock myself in the house and never come out.
That's very unhealthy for you. Better to run away to a hut in the forest and never turn back, building a community of fairies and forest animals. /s
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Lol!! Call it what is BP. Another America bashing page. I could at least have a modicum of respect if you owned it.
Is this considered social media? Yea, a lot of useless content on here as well :)
European countries claiming they have free education, why can’t the US? “It’s just not that hard!” Texas alone is twice the size of Germany. How should the US do that, Germany? How do you do it Germany? Oh, and how did Great Britain and Europeans rebuild after WWI and WWII? Oh, the US did it? Loans? Or what? Ever pay it back? Y’all BPs so ready to bash the US, but have no clue how you got to where you are and we got to where we are.
Best thread. These are all different, not rehashes, all correct, and not anti-American despite claims to the contrary.
If I took everything I read on this website seriously I'd lock myself in the house and never come out.
That's very unhealthy for you. Better to run away to a hut in the forest and never turn back, building a community of fairies and forest animals. /s
Load More Replies... Lol!! Call it what is BP. Another America bashing page. I could at least have a modicum of respect if you owned it.
Is this considered social media? Yea, a lot of useless content on here as well :)
European countries claiming they have free education, why can’t the US? “It’s just not that hard!” Texas alone is twice the size of Germany. How should the US do that, Germany? How do you do it Germany? Oh, and how did Great Britain and Europeans rebuild after WWI and WWII? Oh, the US did it? Loans? Or what? Ever pay it back? Y’all BPs so ready to bash the US, but have no clue how you got to where you are and we got to where we are.
Best thread. These are all different, not rehashes, all correct, and not anti-American despite claims to the contrary.
