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Scrolling through the day's news can be depressing, to say the least. You'd be forgiven for wanting to give it all a miss now and again...
But between the global crises and political turmoil, lies a whole parallel universe. Here, the headlines sound less like fact and more like sitcom plotlines that never made it to TV. Think "Seal breaks into New Zealand home, traumatises cat and hangs out on couch," or "A rare bird in England turned out to be a sea gull covered in curry." You just can't make this stuff up, no matter how hard you try.
If you're looking for some light relief in the midst of another dreary news cycle, you've come to the right place. Bored Panda has gathered up an awesome list of palate cleansers from media outlets across the globe. They're a great reminder that not every news story has to leave you with a heavy heart, and chaos often has a great sense of humor.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
This Is Funny
Sally Moen 14 hours ago
Follow-up story has police coming to arrest him and being unable to find the exit
There’s an old adage in journalism/news circles that “if it bleeds, it leads.” That’s why you’ll often notice a news bulletin beginning with all the negative and grim stuff like disasters, wars, or crime.
While many of us complain that the news is too negative, research shows that typically, people pay more attention to (and tend to remember) negative experiences over positive ones. It's something psychologists call our ‘negativity bias.’
"We’re more likely to spot angry faces than happy ones in a crowd, and many languages have a much wider vocabulary for describing negative emotions than jolly ones," explains BBC's Science Focus.
That's not to say consuming a lot of negative news is good for us...
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#2
Absolutely Mad
#3
My Spirit Animal
Excessive consumption of negative news can be more harmful than we might realize. For one, it can trigger the body’s “fight or flight” response.
"Adrenaline is then released, and so is the stress hormone, cortisol. When our bodies are in this state, we experience the same symptoms we might experience if we were under threat," explains an info sheet released by John Hopkins University. "These symptoms include rapid heart rate, shallow breathing, upset stomach, etc."
Doom-scrolling or watching upsetting footage and news bulletins can also increase symptoms related to anxiety and depression. In fact, for some people, it takes just 14 minutes of dreary news consumption for their depression and anxiety symptoms to rise. They're worsened if someone feels helpless about what's happening in the world.
#4
At No Point Did I Guess Where The Headline Was Going Next
#5
Imagine You're Cycling On A Country Road And You See That On The Side
#6
Roses Are Red, Butter Is Creamy
John Hopkins' experts add that negative news can become addictive, especially when you're getting it from social media.
"Clickbait headlines and social media algorithms are designed to keep you coming back for more, making it difficult to stop returning to apps for your news," they say.
Thankfully, there are ways to protect yourself... Taking a break from the news cycle and scrolling through this hilarious list of headlines is just one of them.
#7
Not At All Heroes Wear Capes
Sally Moen 14 hours ago
The Hillsboro Oregon dancing frogs need these guys at their ongoing ICE protests
#8
Can’t Blame Him
#9
But Ghosts Are Pretend
Another is to identify your triggers. "Take some time to think about what subjects stir symptoms of anxiety and depression. Some people may be more reactive to global conflict while others may feel more affected by racial injustice," suggests the John Hopkins team. "Once you’ve figured out what has the strongest impact on you, you can limit your consumption of media with triggering content."
#10
60 Cupcakes?
NightOwlPanda 16 hours ago
So the bear is being shamed for eating the cupcakes in-house rather than taking them home first like the rest of us do?
#11
This Might Be My New Favorite Headline And Photo Combo Ever
Sally Moen 13 hours ago
Thanks for posting this. I had this saved and had it printed out (yeah, it's a boomer act) for my fridge, but mislaid it. To me, this is the best meme ever
The experts believe it's safer to read the news rather than watch it. Harsh visuals are more likely to trigger you or send you into a spiral than words.
By pausing your doom-scrolling and reading this instead, you're doing yourself a big favor. "Doom scrolling might help you feel more informed about how to protect yourself from the troubles of the world, but it ultimately does more harm than good," notes the site. "Aim for no more than 30 minutes per day if possible."
#13
Possibly The Funniest Headline To Ever Grace A News Site
#14
That Man? The Fire Department
#15
Try Eating In The Bed, Then Sleeping. You Can Have So Much Fun In Bed, Trust Me
Even if you feel helpless about everything going on around you, never forget that you can make a positive difference to the world. Every little bit goes a long way.
You might consider getting involved in some charity work, or joining a group that is working on the issues that you are most passionate about. This not only helps other people but it can empower you as well.
#16
At Spotting A Rare Bird
#17
My WiFi Goes Out Again. Those Sharks Again I Swear
SouthernGal 16 hours ago
“My dog ate my homework” has just been updated to “a shark ate my internet”.
#18
Duck Commits Second Speeding Offence
#19
“Plumber Returns To Re-Clog Pipe After Restaurant Refuses To Pay Bill”
The owner of the restaurant is quoted as saying that the plumber/situation is “ridiculous” and that they’d hate for something similar to happen to his other clients… I bet his other clients pay him!
Upstaged75 14 hours ago
Totally valid! There have also been stories about construction companies taking their word down and landscapers removing grass they installed. I mean, the power company can turn off your electricity if you don't pay. 🤷♀️
#20
It's Difficult To Get A Man To Understand Something When His Salary Depends On His Not Understanding It
Beak Hookage 15 hours ago
I love how whiny they're getting over the fact that everyone hates their stupid AI garbage being forced into everything.
#22
Frog
Zig Zag Wanderer 13 hours ago
I have never seen a pig transformed into a frog. However, I would certainly pay to see it!
#24
Funny Headline
#25
Who Would Have Thought
Ace 13 hours ago
TBF this was widely misreported at the time, she was just complaining about how rude the Parisians were compared with people she'd met on her travels in the rest of Europe. And it's true, they really are, ask any non-Parisian French person.
Kid Murray 4 hours ago
No, they really aren't. Parisians expect people to take a little time and learn about their way of doing things, interacting with people etc. If you don't, they assume you couldn't be bothered to show even a minimum of respect, which you couldn't, and they'll treat you in kind. I, and every other tourist who takes ten whole minutes to learn how to conduct ourselves, find Parisians to be generally friendly and welcoming.
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Crystalwitch60 5 hours ago
How very rude of them to speak their language in their country , like really 😂
sturmwesen 5 hours ago
there is a quote in German "how was I supposed to know they speak Spanish in Spain?" I think it was someone who tried moving to Spain
Sam Trudeau 2 hours ago
Les Américains sur les réseaux sociaux sont parfois les amis, parfois les piles de merde
#26
That's Funny
#27
Never Not Thinking About This Headline
General Anaesthesia 13 hours ago
"The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter." - attributed to Winston Churchill
#28
This Is Looney Toons Level Of Destruction
#29
What A Statement
#30
A Piece Of Tape Makes You A Hacker According To Business Insider
The Goo King 11 hours ago
It absolutely qualifies as being a hacker. Making technology do stuff it was not meant to be doing is the definition. It's just that often it's something deceptively simple, like aplastic whistle to get free phone calls, ahigh vis jacket to access secure areas or a bit of tape to confuse an driverless car.
#31
Let's Call Him An Illegal Dinosaur
#32
This Is A Real Article
Upstaged75 14 hours ago
That's so us old people can look up the definition of the words the kids today are saying. 😂 My niece is only in Kindergarten but over the holidays she kept saying 6-7 at me. 🙄 I think it only gets worse from here on out....
#33
It’s Really Cute
Fellfromthemoon 10 hours ago
If that thing is an outdoor artwork, then either it shall withstand much more than a pair of googy eye-removal, or it's just a temporary artwork meant to perish in a limited time.
#34
No Way
#35
Egg-Cellent Heist
#37
I Think It's Too Late Now
#38
So Many Questions
#39
Pretty Smart
#41
News
Sally Moen 13 hours ago
There might be millions of these mistakes in candy worldwide, but every single other person simply gobbled down the candy anyway
#42
£21
#43
That Must Have Been A Good Ham
Upstaged75 14 hours ago
My dad hasn't stopped farting in the last 50 years! Who should we sue for that? 😂
#44
The Only Memorable Event
#45
Possibly The Greatest Headline Of All Time
#46
Beside The Irony, This Is The Best Evidence That Your Invention Works
#47
The Incident Occurred In India
#48
I Do Not Like This Smiling Ham
#49
That Raccoon Was Definitely Hungry And Angry
#50
“Serial Toilet Clogger"
#51
The Pain
#52
For Hunting... Wait What?
#53
Bread
#54
This Isn't Satire, It Was Genuinely Reported As A News Item
#55
Who Throws A Ham?
#56
Here’s Why
#57
What An Odd Number Indeed
Lost Panda 17 hours ago
Whoever wrote that for the tech section of that "news" outlet needs to be fired...
#58
Anyone Know What’s Going On?
Bill Swallow 3 hours ago (edited)
"The Police presence has increased. Even more police are now investigating." Isn't this a Monty Python skit?
#59
Imagine Reading This Headline To A Medieval Peasant
#60
My Wife And I Just Spent $130 On Beef Jerky, We’re Keeping Them In Business
Multa Nocte 12 hours ago (edited)
For those of you who haven't lived in the US, one of the pleasures of long distance driving is stopping to get snacks, and for many of us the beef jerky is the pièce de resistance of any stop. My spousal unit and I once went on a day trip in Arkansas and on this small highway in the forest there were signs saying, "Beef jerky - 40 miles ahead" and "Beef jerky - 35 miles ahead" and so on. We were so excited about this that we were in a fever frenzy. We got there and the damned place had burned down but they never took the signs down. If I could have found the owners I would have personally killed them.
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