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30 Times People Tried To Be Inspirational On LinkedIn And The Internet Dragged Them For It
LinkedIn is a strange place. No other site has seen such a rapid transformation from professional networking platform to social media page full of users exaggerating (or straight up lying) about personal experiences for clout. The site has become overrun with hustle-obsessed, “motivational” LinkedIn-fluencers, but lucky for us, there are plenty of people lurking who are ready to roast them for their content too.
We’ve taken a trip to the Best Of LinkedIn Instagram account and gathered some of their funniest screenshots “highlighting the heroes and influencers brave enough to share their stories to inspire others.” Enjoy scrolling through this list that might give you secondhand embarrassment, and be sure to upvote the pics you find particularly cringey!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Things You Absolutely Love To See
RELATED:
#2
An Actual, "At The End Everyone Clapped" In The Wild!
𝖊𝖜𝖔𝛋 1 year ago
Pretty sure he’d be met with a loud chorus of Fück off if he tried that (no dis to the Queen, but brits really aren’t that patriotic)
Ian Webling 1 year ago
Would have been more believable if instead of "ushered" they "carried me on their shoulders" to the front of the queue. /s
Tobias Reaper 1 year ago
and today on things that never happened they probably just tutted and rolled their eyes
Lesbian Sloth (she/her) 1 year ago (edited)
😭 there's no way he thought anyone would actually believe this
Lemme get the lemons 1 year ago
Imagine thinking people actually care about the queen that much, she was essentially the equivalent to sports mascot for the uk
#3
The Worst Photoshop Job Ever
Vinny DaPooh 1 year ago
The laptop isn't floating though. A school of fish are clearly holding it up.
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Crybabyartist 1 year ago
It's amazing to me that people read a situation... a scene so much in their own Paradigm/// just amazes me//// OMG
Bozo B. Clown 1 year ago
Photoshop? What Photoshop? There is just a laptop floating line a laptop should in the water.
Charity Angel 1 year ago
Best selling author needs to learn how to use punctuation properly. Also, isn't there supposed to be "dragging" here? Or is BP trying to (and so far succeeding) get us to provide it as part of the article?
The Best Of LinkedIn Instagram account has been sharing hilarious posts from the networking site since 2018, and it has amassed over 41k followers by doing so. But this isn’t the only platform Best Of LinkedIn has succeeded on. As any LinkedInfluencer would tell you, it’s important to have a diverse portfolio, so the creator, JR Hickey, also runs a popular X account with over 40k followers.
We’re such big fans of JR’s work here at Bored Panda that this is the third time we've featured his accounts. And lucky for us, we’ve been able to get in touch with him in the past to hear more about the background of Best Of LinkedIn.
#4
Nothing Because This Exchange Would Never And Did Never Happen
Ian Webling 1 year ago
"We carry the emotional labor of our organizations." is HR-speak for: "We do anything we can to protect the bosses and the company from the whinging workers."
Mona Stevenson 1 year ago
Oh, c’mon now, they provide valuable hand-slaps and sensitivity training leaflets to toxic managers.
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Marcellus II 1 year ago
Because they recognised an unfeeling/misanthropic inhuman droid from a distance.
Load More Replies... Hugh Crawford 1 year ago
How did he know you are HR? Were you sitting around the coffee shop doing nothing, gossiping about your job, and earning the big bucks?
Rostit.. . 1 year ago
HR is the gestapo of companies. There is never anything good that comes out of HR.
Laura Maynor 1 year ago
As someone who works closely with HR (payroll) I would agree and add that they are all idiots, too.
Rosemary 1 year ago
Hard to imagine a coffee shop owner being so rude to a customer, unless that customer was a total a****.
Cindy Brick 1 year ago
Ummm... when I got laid off, HR did NOT have my best interests in mind. In fact, I was lied to. Several times. I don't have a high opinion of HR people, as a result.
#5
Have Some Self Respect
Marcellus II 1 year ago
Possibly those jobs are doing society a favour, by keeping some relatively high-functioning sociopaths off the streets for long stretches of time.
Isaac Nemo 1 year ago
Until they make a bunch of money and then ruin the world anyway, but I do like your point
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troufaki13 1 year ago
*I would have killed for a better work environment. There, I fixed it for you.
Flora Porter 1 year ago
This is the corporate equivalent of 'I was beaten as a child and it never did me any harm.'
Angie Falzarano 1 year ago
My bff worked in banking all his life nobody ever slept under desk. Call bs for one the possibility of someone doing this would raise questions regarding stealing. 2 the bank would know you were doing this due to cameras and would put a stop to it because of theft not just of money but identities. And account access.
Flora Porter 1 year ago
I've known it happen a few times, but only in the context of the last bit of a major deal pitch. These days you could expect a call from HR to your manager because that looks like someone who's not coping, and that's a risk for the company.
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Roxy222uk 1 year ago
Out of that what is annoying me is how could her hair always be wet? Why temperature did they keep their offices at that her hair couldn't dry over 24 hours?
Catlady6000 1 year ago
My hair is waist length and I put it up in a twist after I shower. It's usually dry in 6-8 hrs, depending on humidity
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Just Another Girl 1 year ago
If they’re paying you for 40 hours of work each week but it takes you 60 hours per week to do it, you either need an assistant or you have a significant time management problem.
#6
Happy Birthday Jeff!
Ian Webling 1 year ago
This leads to that great philosophical question: Is it sadder to wish one's self happy birthday or not to?
Load More Replies... troufaki13 1 year ago
"Happy birthday, Jeff" "Thank you, Jeff. What a nice surprise!" "I'm always thinking about you, Jeff" "You're so kind, Jeff".
kansasmagic 1 year ago
I knew I was a real grown up when I started getting more birthday cards from various insurance agents than friends and family. Never tried sending myself a card though.
Comedy Clumbers 1 year ago
Dud, at least use a different photo than your profile. (Dud isn't [sic]. It's fully intentional.)
"Back in 2018, I was an Account Executive for a SaaS company in San Francisco,” JR previously shared. “I had a boss who was a dinosaur—his idea of a good follow-up to a meeting was mailing laminated copies of the deck we presented to the prospect after the fact. The phrase, 'Stop by Kinko's' was uttered a few times in my short tenure there (Kinko's was dropped by FedEx in 2008, ten years prior)."
The creator went on to share that a significant part of his job at the time was cold calling through LinkedIn. "I was already dissatisfied with my role, my career, and the company, so spending a few hours a day on LinkedIn just about pushed me over the edge," he noted.
#7
This Account Has Helped Me Change Careers
Tobias Reaper 1 year ago
this didn't happen so much it made other things that did actually happen not happen any more
kansasmagic 1 year ago
And then he spent 10 hours meme-scrolling on the company dime. Next time my boss sees me doing nothing, I'll tell her that I'm actually finding inspiration to talk louder.
Grey Beard 1 year ago
I lived in the UK for a while and they have a lot of public holidays. I went to work one Monday and thought the office was quiet, but I started early so not unusual. After I'd been there an hour or so someone walked past and said "Sucks to have to work public holidays, eh?". I replied "Wait, what? Today is a holiday???".
Hugh Crawford 1 year ago
So... The person who was supposed to onboard this guy, told him to come into work for his first day on a stat holiday, with no plan to be their themselves...?
#8
You’re An Evil Stepmother
troufaki13 1 year ago
Ah... the obligatory spelling mistakes to show it was written by a toddler
Stardust she/her 1 year ago
6 year olds aren’t stupid, the vast majority of them know very well how to spell most words
Charles McChristy 1 year ago
Yeah, no one has ever wanted to spend time with their stepmother.
The.Butterfly.Effect.530 1 year ago
And then everyone clapped... (I will be adding this to all of the absolute bull s**t posts I see from now on.)
Natty Tempest 1 year ago
Then she sent it via email from an address she saw on a pen once when she was 2. She's up for a scholarship soon, so we need to make the most of our time.
#9
Is This The End Of The #girlboss?
Chris Gaulding 1 year ago
Then ten tiny tots in suites walked in and applauded her and whisked her away on their shoulders
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Dragons Exist 1 year ago
Even the one where he sang the British anthem and everyone clapped?
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Wondering Alice 1 year ago
Words of wisdom from a 10 year old? It really did not occur to this woman that teachers actually do a real job? Child has been given a role, and explained to what that role means.
Crybabyartist 1 year ago
Yeah you wana know whats so funny? I believe this!! I was like Jesus Christ spoke to me
"I began seeing the first inklings of these so-called 'LinkedInfluencers' and started screenshotting their posts and sharing them on my personal Twitter account,” JR continued. “Once those gained traction, I decided to create a dedicated [X] account for it, and thus, @BestOfLinkedin was born."
#10
Courage Is Changing Out Of Your P*ss Soaked Pants
Jrog 1 year ago (edited)
But you would be cutting into precious productivity time! So be professional: p**s your pants, use those two minutes to finish your PowerPoint and boldly stroll in that conference room in front of the CEO. Then, apply for unemployment benefits.
Load More Replies... Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
There are groups for people who enjoy this activity. He should join one.
kansasmagic 1 year ago
How about this version: Stress is feeling like you are going to throw up. Courage is coming into work anyway, throwing up on everyone, and toughing it out because we are a family here.
#11
Thank You Emily
BrownTabby 1 year ago
They’re getting cocaine snorted out of their buttholes by prostitutes. That’s not exactly a moral high ground.
Nikole 1 year ago
It’s bull. They don’t need to advertise, hence no commercials on tv. Jesus, people…
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Leesa DeAndrea 1 year ago
Or their target audience is such a small portion of the population that advertising on tv would be a waste of money.
#12
He Was Just Looking For A New Mother
Jill Rhodry 1 year ago
Why doesn't a 10 year old know your phone number - we all had our home phone's memorised in Kindy.
Roxy222uk 1 year ago
Mobile numbers are longer than landline numbers, plus half the time nowadays people don't know their own numbers. My littlies knew our landline because it was six digits (anyone can look up the dialling code) but I wouldn't expect them to learn mobile numbers. TBH, I do feel like this could be true.
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Sara Anderson 1 year ago
How does your 10 year old not know your mobile number? My 8 year old has known mine for years!
ispeak catanese 1 year ago
And now, let us all aspire to live a #LinkedInLife. (gags to death)
As far as what JR thinks of the culture on LinkedIn, he previously told Bored Panda that he wouldn’t necessarily call it “toxic,” but “downright demented” might be more accurate. “It's just a giant back-patting circle/echo chamber where people aren't even telling a version of the truth anymore," he shared.
#13
Imagine Being So Forgettable That All Anyone Remembers About You Is Your Stupid Socks
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
All because of the power of socks. I wish I known this secret 50 years ago.
Cal Adamson 1 year ago
Forget the power of love, the power of socks is almighty
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Quitethedilemma 1 year ago
Did anyone else initially think "loud socks" meant they made noise as he walked like corduroy pants or wind breakers used to?! Or just me.
kath morgan 1 year ago
Yes I wondered what kind noise the socks made too, I’m too tired
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Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My! 1 year ago
Feelings may have a long shelf life, but socks need to be washed once in awhile.
Janos Schumacher 1 year ago
This is a valid point. I've talked to a lot of sales critters in my life. I remember the ones who are different for any reason. Maybe it's a withered right arm. Maybe it's an interesting hat. Maybe they have yellow shoe laces. Being different matters. Sometimes, that's all it takes to succeed.
Neil O'Connor 1 year ago
"My socks make people feel good" - I have to add that to my daily affirmations list
kansasmagic 1 year ago
My threshold for feeling good is somewhat higher than "seeing someone wearing socks", so I guess that's why I was never cut out for business.
#14
Welcome To The First Ever Edition Of #madeuphomelesspersonmonday
BrownTabby 1 year ago
“Sing along with the common people Sing along and it might just get you through Laugh along with the common people Laugh along, even though they're, they're laughing at you And the stupid things that you do Because you think that poor is cool”
François Carré 1 year ago
"But still you'll never get it right 'Cause when you're laid in bed at night Watching roaches climb the wall If you called your dad he could stop it all"
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Rosemary 1 year ago
I'm not impressed. Guy could have rented a bicycle and slept on a park bench.
ispeak catanese 1 year ago
LOL! How can he be promotion material if he didn't sleep under a piece of cardboard in the park? Lightweight!
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Karen Krause 1 year ago
The bosses I worked for would think this guy's nuts. They give you a room to get a good night's rest and ready for the next day, and also a place to work after traveling.
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 1 year ago
And a shower! If you've slept in your car, are you going to your next meetings in the same clothes you slept in? 🤢
Load More Replies... Duane Wright 1 year ago
BS. No one at your company would notice or care. It wouldn't get you promoted.
Destiny Kruse 1 year ago
My S.O.'s boss actually bought his own trailer to travel around with so he doesn't spend their money paying for a hotel. It's a Fortune 500 company and the owners are worth BILLIONS. They could not care less. No one is surprised, except maybe him.
Load More Replies... Flora Porter 1 year ago
To be honest, saving pennies in cost (a d showing up smelly and dishevelled to your meetings next day) is never going to get you a promotion - it's strategy, new ideas, relationship skills and profit. Or to use an old-fashioned expression: penny wise, pound foolish.
#15
Yep Same Thing
Jrog 1 year ago
In my direct experience, it's marketers that try to convince actual engineers to do something differently because "it makes more sense" (spoiler, it doesn't).
Vinny DaPooh 1 year ago
So, I kind of promised the client that they will be able to control the space time continuum with this device. How long will it take you to build that into the product specs???
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Jared Robinson 1 year ago
you haven't talked to many doctors have you? i'm sure they get this all the time
Tabitha 1 year ago (edited)
Being that I did not graduate from medical school then complete a lengthy internship, I would not be inclined to tell my doctor how to perform surgery on a family member. Now, long before the surgery is even scheduled, I may be discussing all the alternatives with the doctor, as well as seeking the opinions of other doctors, but once the decision was 100% firm, with NO doubts or hesitation on anyone’s part, to go with one particular doctor’s diagnosis and suggestion for specific surgical procedures to be performed, I wouldn’t be throwing a monkey wrench into the works at the last minute. There comes a point, after choosing the professional you deem to be the best to perform a particular task, where you just have to trust their expertise. I mean, are you going to do the surgery yourself? No. If you have doubts about the surgeon, or the necessity of the operation the day of surgery, then you didn’t do a good job of vetting doctors and surgeons, weighing all the second, third, or fourth opinions, and researching as much as you can about them (such as searching for them with the state medical board to see if there are any complaints about them, also the Medical Business Bureau is run by the BBB itself, there are also other resources to check up on them) long before that day.
GirlFriday 1 year ago
As a marketer, this post is offensive. Build the product, show me the product, I will sell it. That is how it works.
The.Butterfly.Effect.530 1 year ago
Wait until she hears about covid, antivaxers, transgender....
Brett Layton 1 year ago
Ive been in sales for a long while now. kinda sit between marketing and dev. Marketing rarely has had the slightest inkling of what most tech products actually do and just sorta throw out buzz words.
According to JR, LinkedIn is full of “unoriginal sellouts who regurgitate corporate buzzwords and stories of incredible business acumen in an effort to game the algorithm and try to hide the fact that there isn't a single thing that's interesting about them.”
“And nobody will call them out, for fear of losing their job or it blowing back on them professionally,” he added. “The entire platform lacks accountability, which is insane because its intention initially was to be just that.”
#16
Thank God Jake Is Back In Our Lives
Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My! 1 year ago
We've been gone longer than that, due to issues with the BP app. It looks like it might be working now. Feed us tuna!
Load More Replies... BrownTabby 1 year ago
Dear god. As someone who has a rough workload, you can’t always control how much work you have to do, but you can always control whether you apologise for taking two (2) days off to a bunch of people you DON’T EVEN WORK FOR. Stop being a little bǐtch, dude.
#17
“Is This Why Mom Left?”
BrownTabby 1 year ago
Given that his title is “VP of Growth”, I’d say it is a “flex”, but as someone who has had to learn how to take holidays despite real workload issues, he just sounds like a little bìtch to me.
Load More Replies... kansasmagic 1 year ago
Stupid child! Posting trite content on LinkedIn isn't actually "going to work".
Natty Tempest 1 year ago
Because replacing this with "facebook" or even "p0rnhub" makes him any better of a dad?
#18
"Punch Me Directly In The Face!"
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
I'm supposed to take advice about a work connection website from a guy who blanks out his eyes?
Comedy Clumbers 1 year ago
My eyes rolled so hard I saw down the back of my throat. Are... are tonsils supposed to look like that?
Natty Tempest 1 year ago
Gorsh. Grandma's making the world go round... I'm more inclined to believe she called you her long-dead husband and spent the flight talking about the kids she wanted to have...
But JR doesn’t hate everything about LinkedIn. He noted that it can be a “terrific place to read business news, as well as to find jobs, recruit talent, and network with people in your industry.”
"It's a valuable business development tool, but sadly it's been watered down by these self-proclaimed 'LinkedInfluencers' and their BS success stories,” the creator previously told Bored Panda. “LinkedIn could improve the user experience drastically by focusing on moderating these posts and suppressing them when they don't offer anything valuable.”
#19
And That Something Is That This Story Is A Load Of Sh*t
General Anaesthesia 1 year ago
"So keep your tooth, you ungrateful runt". I think there is something in that for all of us to chew on.
Neil O'Connor 1 year ago
I don't remember the toothfairy ever making me an offer. Maybe its something that only happens to LinkedIn losers I mean users.
Ross “Sarcastic Dad” 1 year ago
And just like the toothfairy, this conversation doesn't exist.
kansasmagic 1 year ago
Don't try to negotiate with things that don't exist? Is that the lesson?
#20
I Don’t Think It’s The Algorithm Joe
Ross “Sarcastic Dad” 1 year ago
It could be because you refer to it as, "The mobile application Tinder", but I could be wrong.
#21
You’re Delusional If You Think People Will Worry About You Tobi
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago (edited)
Hopefully he won't find himself sitting next to the eyeless 'granny lover' in the earlier post.
"If the only reason you're posting on LinkedIn is to show off a picture of yourself with a story about how you were called 'too pretty' to be in business, then your post will be taken down,” JR continued. “If you aren't sharing anything educational or valuable, and instead are attributing incredible management advice from your FIVE YEAR OLD, your account will be banned. Sadly, I wish this was an easy fix, but LinkedIn has replicated every other social media platform and become another runaway train of trash.”
#22
He Looks So Frightened And Alone
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
How does he find the time to write this stuff when he's constantly masturbating?
Steve Hall 1 year ago
Nobody gets triggered by linkedin posts, most people don't even know where they are.
Anna Meyers 1 year ago
If you have to keep telling us how successful you are, I start to wonder what you aren't telling us.
You stole that from Robocop 1 year ago
So you run a tax avoidance scheme? Unlikely, no one would trust someone as douchey as you with their money.
Mama Penguin 1 year ago
In my experience, people who fly business class all the time don't actually brag about it.
#23
Folks - This Is Not A Parable For The Year 2023 In Sales/Marketing/Saas
Blue Malamute 1 year ago
Nah it's booked to star in someone's crappy apology video tomorrow morning
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Multa Nocte 1 year ago
This is just too pathetic for words. I am snorting with laughter and my spouse is staring at me . . . . .
Lunaofthenest (She/they) 1 year ago
Honestly, I stopped reading when he tried to tie a ridiculous event that didn't happen into a work parable.
Tabitha 1 year ago
Wait. There was a fire alarm going off. He wouldn’t just be lying on the floor waiting for the nurse. His teacher would’ve gotten him outside, conscious or not, because it’s her responsibility to make sure her classroom is empty and all her students are outside when the alarm rings. The school nurse would’ve tended to his wound outside, because she too would’ve evacuated the building, and there is no way he would’ve been talking to the Vice Principal in any way, shape, or form. The VP would’ve been helping direct the fire drill/evacuation, and stayed in place to give information to responding firefighters. As for the Doritos, well he’s a kid and kids have their own priorities, you know. So yeah, 100% pure unadulterated b******t.
The Mighty Interceptors 1 year ago
By “playing” the ukulele does he mean “hitting the fire alarm with” the ukulele?
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
A 12 year old. Really? Most 12 year olds would just been rapt with fire alarm going off.
Tabitha 1 year ago (edited)
Seriously. We loved fire drills because they got us out of class and outside. We never panicked when they went off because we were so stoked. Hell, we only wished they happened more often.
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Snorkeldorf 1 year ago (edited)
Twelve year old freaked when the fire alarm went off? Result was panic, bleeding and barfing. This was a parable for the year 2023. For 2024 try to refrain from panic and use your head (although not as a ukulele target). It's not like it's your first fire alarm. This should drastically reduce future bleeding and barfing. Will be applicable to most ages and professions.
#24
“I’m Important!” He Screamed Into His Tear Streaked Pillow
Jrog 1 year ago
"Linkedin top voice" is the digital equivalent of the crazy hobo screaming "the end is near" on the walkway.
JR also shared that LinkedInfluencers don’t usually take kindly to being featured on his accounts. “When you create anything for the Internet, there's going to be 50% or more people who hate it. So you have to know that criticism comes with the territory. But when a LinkedInfluencer sees me poke fun at them for @BestofLinkedin? Oftentimes they don't know what to do with themselves,” the creator says.
“Usually, they'll try to doxx me or get me fired. Good luck, I'm a freelance Creative Director and don't have a boss. I get paid to write things for social media and more. So yeah, I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to,” JR explained. “If you don't like what's being said about you on the Internet, the proper response isn't to take your ball and run home. Or worse, take your ball and run and tell your parents."
#25
This Is The Face Of The Man Who's Been Submitted To Bestoflinkedin The Most In The Past 24 Hours
Tobias Reaper 1 year ago
what weird way of saying my stupid business decision led to me having to lay off some of my staff
DragonofMordor 1 year ago
Because he thinks this will make people feel bad for him rather than his poor ex-employee who hopefully now has a better boss.
Load More Replies... Tabitha 1 year ago (edited)
So full of s**t. Bet he’s buying a boat or house, or planning on taking a luxury vacation on the money that won’t be spent on the paychecks those people would have received if they weren’t unemployed. Think that wouldn’t be the case? Then you haven’t been around, my friend. Several years ago I worked at a company that cried poor, froze wages, and laid off a full third of their workforce right before Thanksgiving. After Thanksgiving is when all the boxes from luxury stores like Tiffany’s started arriving at the front desk. Then the boss had the gall to brag about the luxury vacation he was taking his girlfriend on, where he planned to propose to her, even showing the brochures to the receptionist! Oh, and the boss was also really into cocaine, and had been in and out of very expensive rehab several times. BTW, he didn’t build the business, he inherited it—-then ran it into the ground to support his expensive habits, to the point where his parents fired him and came out of retirement to run it again.
Eric Martinez 1 year ago
In other words, "my pride and thoughtless actions took food off other peoples tables, but look at how humble I am now"
Mediocre Genius 1 year ago
He is so upset yet had the presence of mind to take a sad face selfie.
Blue Malamute 1 year ago
Lol maybe if he instead hired people based on how well they do their jobs ...?
Ashley Deane 1 year ago (edited)
I mean I kind of believe this Edit: autocorrect put know of instead of kind of
#26
Genuinely Truly The Worst Advice Ever
Lunaofthenest (She/they) 1 year ago
Does this person pay bills or consume food? Maybe they should let him go and hire him back to "help for free with his newly acquired downtime!"
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Diana Lucas 1 year ago
And then those people working for free can ask their mortgage company to forgive their payments if they just write a new foreclosure notice for them for all their other out of work homeowners. They can also ask the grocery store for free food if they just reorganize the baking aisle. Sheesh.
zovjraar me 1 year ago
laid off? just work for free! i'm sure all those bill collectors will understand!
Lisa Perry 1 year ago
What company is going to let some stranger in to work around confidential products and data?
Vinny DaPooh 1 year ago
Yeah. All the great CEOs and corporate VPs make their contact info publicly available for everyone to see.
Elio 1 year ago
If I was working for free while lias off, I'd much rather go help the food bank because then I'd be helping people. I actually do know a bunch of stuff for my field (yay established career; I can buy avocado toast). Some of this stuff I learned at my current job, which pays me money.
#27
Let Me Try To "Be Nice" - You're Full Of Sh*t Natalia
Multa Nocte 1 year ago (edited)
A LOT unrelated, but f**k Starbucks and f**k this pretentious b***h who brags about how kind and sweet and gracious and polite she is every single day, huh? So wonderful that after she spends a ton of money at this unnecessary place that they gift her with some free egg bites? AAARRRGGGHHH!!!! I've read too many LinkIn posts now and I'm falling off the Cliffs of Insanity!!!
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tarryn norwich 1 year ago
As a former Sbux employee.... we don't care enough to give you free sh!t
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago (edited)
Last week I went to use my card to travel on a bus. The driver said 'No, this one's on me". I asked why, and she beat around the bush a bit, but eventually she said it's because I'm always polite to her, and she thinks that I'm a good person. She has seen me helping other passengers, especially the elderly, onto buses. I found someone's wallet last year and passed it on to her. Until I read the story above, I'd never really thought how much trying to be a good person, is noticed by others. That my politeness can lift someone else's day. That basically being nice, can have a postive effect. I'm pleased I found a forum to share this with others. Kindness really does matter. However, I still wont be letting people on my bus for free.
Karen Krause 1 year ago
They must be in a really ratty place in town where she's the only polite person they get.
Are you feeling inspired to hop on LinkedIn and share some of your own motivational content, pandas? Feel free to do so if you feel the calling, just be sure to send us the links so we can laugh at– I mean, enjoy your posts too. Keep upvoting the pics you can’t possibly take seriously, and if you’re looking for even more cringey content from LinkedIn, check out this Bored Panda article next!
#28
Sounds Awesome
kansasmagic 1 year ago
I've eaten alone many times. Pretty sure it didn't "scare" anyone. Then again, I have never tied my contentment to other peoples' fear, so...
Wintermute 1 year ago
I eat at restaurants by myself quite a bit. I have no concept of how that makes anyone else there feel. They've never seemed to notice and I've never asked. It's almost as if I'm not the main character of everyone else's story and yet somehow I manage to be okay. Weird, right?
Realistic Optimist 1 year ago
I'm just imagining him eating pasta so furiously that it's terrifying everyone around him.
You stole that from Robocop 1 year ago
No, what scares others is you muttering to yourself and then randomly manically laughing.
#29
Domestic Violence: A Joking Matter
Eric Martinez 1 year ago
This should be much higher, this one actually didn't make me cringe like the rest of them have so far.
Maartje 1 year ago
He also nearly broke her leg and neck. * eye roll* . And POSSIBLY nearly caused her to have a brain bleed. All stuff that nearly happened but it didn't . She should have written "he did not chip my tooth" to be accurate rather than dramatic.
Load More Replies... #30
God Gives The Toughest Battles To His Strongest Soldiers
Jrog 1 year ago
"I followed a stupid diet invented by a random TikTokker, then I broke down and discovered that actual humans require real food. So I wore a cringeworthy novelty shirt and wrote this post"
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago (edited)
I don't recall anyone saying it wasn't okay to break down. As for putting it online. That's just a 'Remember I'm here' post
Daya Meyer 1 year ago
If your body stops cleaning itself you need to see a doctor. If it is dialysis or a transplant depends but an organ failure can not be treated with a 'cleanse'.
Lunaofthenest (She/they) 1 year ago
And what tf is a "goatmilk cleanse?" I swear to gods, doing something for x days in a row doesn't make it a "cleanse" Thank you, please resume.
James016 1 year ago
Now you tell me as I am on a roll with my cheeseburger cleanse. But I am no quitter so I will see it through to the end. 👍
Load More Replies... Anna Meyers 1 year ago
Eat a moderate, healthy diet and drink plenty of water. Your body is smarter than you are. It will cleanse itself.
#31
Sister’s Dying…better Post This Picture Of Myself On Linkedin
Mat Hall 1 year ago
This one isn't so bad - a bit pretentious, maybe, but at least she's actually taking time off rather than telling everyone that working is more important than family/health/etc.
Jrog 1 year ago (edited)
She is still using a supposedly serious family and personal matter to push her "brand", sprinkling in some posed photos to grab attention. Textbook "I am taking this matter in a very serious and dignified way" vibes, innit?
Load More Replies... Cindy Brick 1 year ago
Let's see. We WERE talking about the sister and focusing on her... right?
#32
Look We All Get Hangry Sometimes
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
I want everyone to know that ignoring my hunger for several hours to respond to my wife who was pregnant and in crisis was the sole reason my son is alive. I, ignorer of tummy rumbles, actually put my wife and child before my stomach for several HOURS! KNEEL DOWN AND WORSHIP ME FOR MY UNHEARD OF SACRIFICE!
Jrog 1 year ago (edited)
"I once did a sensible thing for a change, by taking the frankly obvious choice of prioritizing my wife's medical needs over my craving for a snack. Here I am, still bragging about it seventeen years later".
Maartje 1 year ago
Reading this, I would have ran from this guy if he was my husband- a long time ago. This whole "My son turned 17 " thing turned into a celebration of self. "I relented. Reluctantly." Well, how GRACIOUS of you not to do what YOU wanted for once. KUDOS for allowing the wife to get her way.
#33
A Perfectly Reasonable Way To Parent!
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago (edited)
Is this a specifically American thing? It makes no sense to me whatsoever. I teach mine the New Zealand way. Let them duke it out! You need to know which one could be a threat in the future.
BarkingSpider 1 year ago
No, because I'm from the US and it makes no sense to me either.
Load More Replies... zovjraar me 1 year ago
my mum always said, if you can't share, NOONE gets it! and she'd take it and put it on top of the fridge. we quickly learned to share and i've always thought this is a great solution for all sorts of things. two people wanting to fight for the affection of a third? take the third person away from both of them. two (or more) countries fighting for a place? take it away from everyone. teenagers trying to one-up each on a thermos? take all the thermos away from all of them. the only party who gets to hold the "thing" is whoever doesn't want it. and they determine when the "thing" can be let go for grabs. this is how we achieve world peace, people. thanks, mum!
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
It has been many aeons since I have used the term, "Gag me with a spoon," but I feel that this comment merits this reaction.
#34
Oh My God
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
I've seen priests with their eyes blocked out before, and it wasn't for a good reason. He really should have though this through.
#35
I Can't Do This Anymore
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
What in Sam Hill does the last two paragraphs have to do with paruresis?
Isaac Nemo 1 year ago
That's when he remembered he was on LinkedIn and not Facebook and improvised
Load More Replies... Karen Krause 1 year ago
I'm concerned about what kind of "Exposure therapy" is used for people not comfortable peeing in public restrooms.
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
There are so many things in this universe that I do not need to know, and this ranks up there somewhere.
#36
Someone Call Child Protective Services
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
I'm only on the 43rd LinkedIn post and I am losing my will to live! Apparently this goes up to 68 entries, so I better come back later!
Maartje 1 year ago
just hold on, hold on- still with ya. We can get through this together.
Load More Replies... Mark (it/urgh) 1 year ago
So she's moving to the Republic of Ireland? What does ROI even mean?
ispeak catanese 1 year ago
I work in Med Recs, and was in initially confused: Release of Information?? She's not going to make any money with that.
Karen Krause 1 year ago
He should get a life/hobby. He's talking business too much if the kid is picking it up at 3.
JB 1 year ago (edited)
She isn’t! She either picked up a completely random letter that happened to be “I” or, maybe, starting to spell but can’t spell her name yet.
Load More Replies... #37
AirPods In A Meeting ✅ Self Published Book On Table ✅ Biggest Douchebag On Linkedin ✅
#38
A Grown Man Did This
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
Clinical child psychologist here. NO 4-year-old writes like this. Sorry.
Karen Krause 1 year ago
I was going to say, that I haven't seen a four-year-old with motor skills for letter writing like that or not following the prescribed way of making letters. "Bs" always have the l and 3 separate.
Load More Replies... Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
That is NOT a four year old's writing! It has been written by a practised hand.
#39
Your 4 Year Old Should Have Drowned You In The Tub Instead Matt
#40
Thanks Dr. Richard
#41
Guess Who's Back? (Back Again)
#42
C'mon Vick, My Girl's On Here
#43
Just Pure Insanity
EasyBreezyCataneze 1 year ago
What's with people posting their crying photos on social media? I once saw the mirror while crying and boy I look ugly. Avoided mirror while crying from that day. And didn't cry in front of anyone after that.
Diana Lucas 1 year ago
So, who was paying the bills all that time while you got your business up and running? Just curious.
Maartje 1 year ago
I was asking mah self that same question cuz a girl gotta eat.
Load More Replies... #44
Our Wife Is Cheating On You
#45
Not All Heroes Wear Capes
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago (edited)
A four year old doesn't really make a sacrifice. They live with what is dealt to them at that age.
LH25 1 year ago
A 4 year old isn't making sacrifices for you. She is dealing with the reality her dad puts work first. She doesn't forgive you for all that, she deals with it. You needed to take the day off, stay home and take care of her. Geez, the "made a bed in my office" and tummy rubs makes her sound like a puppy.
#46
Sounds Like He'll Be Selling Pills Soon
Cal Adamson 1 year ago
Why wouldn't the other kids just buy them from a shop for half the price?
Isaac Nemo 1 year ago
Because it wouldn't make a fun LinkedIn BS story, of course lol
Load More Replies...
BarkingSpider 1 year ago
Your child's school hates you and you are teaching your child to have no respect for the rules or authority. Hopefully he'll be able to afford good lawyers in the future when he gets caught doing something illegal because his dad taught him rules don't apply to him.
#47
Your Parties Sound Like They Suck, Pramod
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
Killer parties. Network with people that write code or write checks. This guy has got to be a true wanker.
Diana Lucas 1 year ago
*writes kid a check so he'll bug off and leave me alone* would be most the people at this party, apparently.
Zephyr343 1 year ago
And then immediately call their bank to void it as lost or stolen
Load More Replies... Karen Krause 1 year ago
Yea, 13 years old and raised 50K in an hour, by grifting his father's friends/clients.
#48
Pretty High Bar You Set
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
You're a co-founder of a business, and you've only just worked this out. Also. You, could grab a couple of kids off the street. They'll be every bit as good with a bit of polishing up.
#49
In Honor Of #nba Basketball Being Back, Here's A Linkedin Employee Comparing Himself To Kobe Bryant
Karen Krause 1 year ago
My Dad used to go to work early because he said he got most of his work done when nobody was there to bother him. When everyone else comes in, there are meetings, interruptions, etc. But, a lot of workplaces are meant for people to work when no one is around, restaurants for one.
#50
What An Absolute Loser
Diana Lucas 1 year ago
Put the phone down for just once and enjoy the damn wedding, you weirdo!
#51
Imagine Walking Into Someone’s House And Seeing This Sign
HellbladesFFXI 1 year ago
I admit this one isn't too bad. Whatever gets you through your work day I suppose.
Lindsey Madison 1 year ago (edited)
Not sure what's so bad about this one. I've had to pep-talk myself before work. "You don't HAVE to go to work, you GET to go to work." Sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't...
#52
So This *didn’t Happen This Morning
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
Why are these movers and shakers going to Starbucks? I'd expect them to be buying expensive coffee, rather than mass produced stuff.
Greg Baughman 1 year ago
I mean, have you looked at Starbuck's prices recently?
Load More Replies...
#53
Thought About It: You’re A Loser
James016 1 year ago
That's not the flex you think it is, a quick poll shows that 100% of people (1) in the room I am sitting in would prefer Harvard
YTK 1 year ago
Same here, but there is approximately a third of a large high schools student body in this room
Load More Replies... #54
Strange How So Many Women Who Are Accused Of Being "Too Pretty" Just Have To Include A Photo Of Themself
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
P.S. Here is a picture of my chest and I don't understand why everyone talks about my chest all the time!
Jrog 1 year ago (edited)
Ah, yes, she is in #BUSINESS. She is so into #BUSINESS that she #BUSINESSED *twice* today, and her boss told her "You are so good at #BUSINESS, your #BUSINESSING creates harmony all around". They are still not sure about what she actually does, though.
Karen Krause 1 year ago
Yeah, a business woman mad that someone remarked on her appearance while wearing a super low top so her boobs look like a deep breath will be their undoing.
#55
Presented Without Comment
#56
You’re Not Going To Believe Who Justin Compared Himself To
Hippopotamuses 1 year ago (edited)
I must remember that cool joke for the next time I'm at a drive through. Better remember to put my window up, though. I wouldn't want to wear my order.
zovjraar me 1 year ago
har har har you sure don't look busy har har. now give me something for free cuz i'm so witty and funny. i'm sorry, that is really my take away from this post.
#57
"I Love Being Your (Made Up) Son!"
Karen Krause 1 year ago
On TV and in the movies when this scene plays, the daddies take the whole day off.
Load More Replies... #58
Can't Wait To Listen
Diana Lucas 1 year ago
Um. The 'betas' comment cements that he's thinks he's an alpha, which is fake science.
Praea Kitten 1 year ago
"I'm way too good to do low-level work and all my talent is mindless talk that no one wants to hear. I want actual talent to do all of the work with no pay and no back-talk, remember, I'm the mouth of this outfit. Don't bother responding to my post, do *more work* to direct message me and be prepared to grovel at my feet begging to slave for me because I'm obviously better than all of you." Ftfy
#59
This Is Why We Must #vote!
Praea Kitten 1 year ago
Dude did the work already by paying (probably) retail or close to it, having a cart (assumably) spending his time shopping and selling, and deserves to make a living. You paid a convenience fee and complain about being ripped off. You're the problem.
Andrei Caldararu 1 year ago
If you're the kind of person who wants to pretend they can buy whatever they want, without checking the price, you don't get to complain about being ripped off.
Mark (it/urgh) 1 year ago
Guy probably took one look at your entitled a$$, watched you ignore him in favour of your trivial conversation and phone call, and thought "Yeah I'll rip this twat off." And fair play to him.
#60
Hopefully Somebody Robs You After This Post
#61
"But Don't Forget About Me!"
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
Because that is what Leonardo DaVinci had in mind when he painted this.
#62
9 Days Apart
James016 1 year ago
I don't think this is cringy. This is someone who had real mental health issues. I am assuming that his workload led to a severe burnout.
Lauren K 1 year ago
The cringy part is posting a crying selfie. Why do people do that?
Load More Replies... Hippopotamuses 1 year ago
Poor guy. Good on him for this. It's a very real illustration of what's actually happening in the background of people's lives. Interestingly. He's not blocked out his face like practically all of the others posted.
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
If he is saying that the first situation led him to the mental hospital, then this isn't a bad comment.
#63
What A Diverse Work History!
#64
Good Morning To Everyone Except Andrew
Jack Smith 1 year ago (edited)
i agree with that last one. however, I probably wouldn't want to spend more than five minutes in a room with someone who posts stuff like this on LinkedIn
#65
She Must Be So Happy Stuart
#66
"Quick Go Put On This Costume I Bought You For Fake Internet Points"
Diana Lucas 1 year ago
I'd vote for a candidate who wore that. Talk about confidence!
Load More Replies... #67
Go Home
Seven (She/Them) 1 year ago
This just feels like a Nerodivergent adult trying to explain why they do things. I've slept under the desk in my room before, two feet away from my bed, just because it made me feel comforted.
#68
But Not Before Posting To One Of The Worst Networks For Your Mental Health!
Diana Lucas 1 year ago
This doesn't belong here. Taking mental health days when needed is a good thing and needs to be normalized.
Diana Lucas 1 year ago
What better way to reach those who need mental health days than Linkedn?
Load More Replies... Add New Image
What do you think ?
Dan St John 1 year ago
I started with Linkedin when it first came out. Then, it was for professionals to talk, meet, network and pass on helpful information. About 10 years ago, people started asking to be added to my network and then started to try and sell me stuff. That is when I said enough.
Wim Cossement 1 year ago
LinkedIn is just people petting themselves on their backs, trying to stay relevant, and if they could, they'd probably suck their own d1ck instead of having someone else on the site do it.
Load More Replies... Flora Porter 1 year ago
LinkedIn really is peak wank, isn't it? It's all people trying to build a business influencer profile and recruiters wanting acces to your contacts. Mind you, after their second major data breach, presumably everyone now hasn't my contacts.
INGI 1 year ago
I got my last two jobs off of LinkedIn. So, yes. People do use it. Sadly, a lot of them are total douches, but...
Load More Replies... Nikki Sevven 1 year ago
I made it through the first 10 before the secondhand embarrassment became intolerable. LinkedIn is like public masturbation, isn't it?
FaceTime Audio 1 year ago
What is even the point of these LinkedIn posts? Why would anyone use LinkedIn? Do people actually find jobs through LinkedIn, or is it just this nonsense? Why not just email colleagues?
Annie 1 year ago
The last straw for me was when a company contacted me to interview for an opening, I showed up early, but the hiring manager left me sitting in their lobby for nearly 30 minutes after the scheduled interview time & then never bothered to contact me afterward. Deleted my account after that.
Dan St John 1 year ago
I started with Linkedin when it first came out. Then, it was for professionals to talk, meet, network and pass on helpful information. About 10 years ago, people started asking to be added to my network and then started to try and sell me stuff. That is when I said enough.
Wim Cossement 1 year ago
LinkedIn is just people petting themselves on their backs, trying to stay relevant, and if they could, they'd probably suck their own d1ck instead of having someone else on the site do it.
Load More Replies... Flora Porter 1 year ago
LinkedIn really is peak wank, isn't it? It's all people trying to build a business influencer profile and recruiters wanting acces to your contacts. Mind you, after their second major data breach, presumably everyone now hasn't my contacts.
INGI 1 year ago
I got my last two jobs off of LinkedIn. So, yes. People do use it. Sadly, a lot of them are total douches, but...
Load More Replies... Nikki Sevven 1 year ago
I made it through the first 10 before the secondhand embarrassment became intolerable. LinkedIn is like public masturbation, isn't it?
FaceTime Audio 1 year ago
What is even the point of these LinkedIn posts? Why would anyone use LinkedIn? Do people actually find jobs through LinkedIn, or is it just this nonsense? Why not just email colleagues?
Annie 1 year ago
The last straw for me was when a company contacted me to interview for an opening, I showed up early, but the hiring manager left me sitting in their lobby for nearly 30 minutes after the scheduled interview time & then never bothered to contact me afterward. Deleted my account after that.
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