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50 Hilariously Bad Names That Had People Questioning, “What The Hell Were Their Parents Thinking?”
Choosing a name for your child is not an easy task. After all, it is one that they will have to walk around with for the rest of their lives; unless, of course, they take matters into their own hands and change it.
Well, today, we want to shed light on some of the unique ones. Unhinged, even. Shared by people after a NICU nurse started a discussion about it on TikTok, they comprised quite a colorful collection, which we have put on the list below. So if you’re curious about what unhinged names some people think fit their child or what names some children might want to change later in life, scroll down to find them below and feel free to head straight to the comment section if you, too, know a person with a rather unique name.
On the list below, you will also find Bored Panda’s interview with a sociolinguist, professor in the department of English at the University of Nevada, and author of Like, Literally, Dude: Arguing for the Good in Bad English, Dr. Valerie Fridland, who was kind enough to answer a few of our questions about unique names.
Image credits: victoriaaa_u
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Dental hygienist 🙋♀️we had a patient named Shadynasty. Pronounced: Sha-dynasty not shady nasty like the dentist said. 🥲
RELATED:
#2
not a nurse but worked on postpartum floor; twins abracadabra & alacazam 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
#3
Canon and Crystal. Their last name is Ball.
Naming a child can be a headache for many reasons—there might be too many or too few options to choose from that you like, the ones that you do like might not “fit” your baby, or every single name might bear connotations, stopping you from naming your child one way or another; not to mention when there’s a second parent involved in the decision-making process, with another list of yeses and nos.
According to Dr. Valerie Fridland, a sociolinguist, professor in the department of English at the University of Nevada, and author of Like, Literally, Dude: Arguing for the Good in Bad English, the idea that names need to “fit” an object or person has been around since antiquity.
“In Plato’s discussion of language in the Cratylus, Socrates suggests names are not simply arbitrary labels we give things but emerge from some quality of what is being named. In other words, Socrates argues that names must capture some natural aspect or sense of the person or thing that is being named,” she explained in an interview with Bored Panda.
#4
Not a nurse- but ALMOST a victim. mom named me Pixie Freedom Rose Starshine Hello... until Grandma intervened
#5
Twins Michael and lil Michael. Mom threatened to beat me up when I laughed. I didn’t know she was serious
Talking about unique names, Dr. Fridland noted that it can be a blessing and a curse. Also, the way people feel about an unusual name tends to change with age.
“Early on, kids don’t like to be different from other kids and, in elementary school, a very unique name can make a kid stand out or become a target for teasing,” she said. “When we are older, though, a distinctive name can be something that sets you apart and makes you memorable to those you meet as they have an element of unexpectedness and surprise that can ramp up attention.”
#6
Ya’highness & Ya’majesty - spelled exactly like that
#8
Peds ER nurse here & I have a LIST in my notes app. Top contender being twins named Nowledge and Wysdom, spelled like that
“Another bonus of unique names is that others are less likely to have a negative association with it from some unpleasant person they once knew,” the sociolinguist continued. “So if you knew a Frank that was a jerk years ago, you might still hold a grudge against all Franks going forward.
“However, the research on how people with unique names feel later in life is a bit mixed, with some research suggesting that common names tend to be a safer bet in predicting success later in life.”
#9
L&D nurse here: Phelony. 😐
#11
Education here. And so many names but one of my favorites, a little girl named Hella Shady.
Upstaged75 6 months ago
That shouldn't be allowed! Poor kid. A teacher friend of mine once had a student named Majestic Fox. That was the kid's first name....
Expanding on the idea that common names tend to be a safer bet in predicting success later in life, Dr. Fridland noted that that is related to certain biases some people hold.
“This may be related more to the fact that unique names often give hints as to socioeconomic status or ethnicity because the dominant culture in a society often plays a role in which names are noticed and how they are received. If a name calls attention to ethnicity, for example, it can result in discrimination in institutional or workplace environments owing to a bias against that group.
“Research shows that simply having an ethnic-sounding name on an application can affect how often that person is selected for an interview,” the expert pointed out.
#13
not a nurse but when I volunteered at the hospital I witnessed a nurse having to explain to mom that it was Aretha Franklin and not Urethra Franklin. She almost named her daughter Urethra
“In short, what we name our kids may not be the issue,” Dr. Fridland summed up. “Instead, how other people react to those names—in positive or negative ways—is really what seems to play a big role in how well kids succeed in life as it can affect how kids view themselves.”
#15
Negativeteigh. Mitochondria.
#16
We had twins Greg and Greg’nisha
#17
It’s a tie between gnocchi and lilsexxyy
Upstaged75 6 months ago
It really shouldn't be legal to name your kid something involving s*x or d***s.
#18
PLACENTA. We showed her what a placenta was, and said please don’t…
Maisey Myles 6 months ago
Friend’s dad was an OB. Had to explain that V****a - pronounced Va-geena) wasn’t a very good name
#19
Ho’nasty - pronounced honesty…
#20
Twins in the nicu, one boy one girl named Brock Lee and Callie Flower…
MicrowaveGoddess 6 months ago
I mean, if it's first and middle name, it's at least somewhat normal-ish. Brock and Callie are good first names
#22
Currencie and Ar’money. Not related but on the unit at the same time, so naturally we pretended they got married a made a whole money-themed family tree for them.
#23
I served the table of a family with a little boy named Taint. I had the mom spell it out because I thought she said Tate at first. Nope. Taint. I often wonder if he has gone no contact.
#24
dietitian in a behavioral psych hospital… kid with oppositional defiant disorder named nemesis
#25
Former Newborn Nurse here- worst name was a baby girl named Wolverine. 😳
#26
Nahlig (pronounced knowledge), his siblings were James and Robert. Poor kid
Bi.Felicia 6 months ago
Wtaf? Poor kid is right. Clearly his parents need to gain some knowledge and stop popping out kids, if you aren't going to name them properly.
#27
Lucifer… oddly enough I took care of another baby named Messiah in the same night.
#28
dawasher & dadryer (twins in NICU)
#30
I used to coach three siblings: boo, piglet, and noodle.
Upstaged75 6 months ago
Those sound like nicknames. My niece had a silly nickname that everyone called her and some people thought it was her real name. (It was Butzy. Don't ask me why!)
#31
Semaj. James backwards because why just name your child James.
BrownEyedGrrl 6 months ago
My granddaughter had a boyfriend named Semaj. I asked her where he's from, thinking it might be some exotic place. No. His twin was James.
#32
911 dispatcher, had to run a guy on a traffic stop and his name, legal government name was bud weiser
#33
PP nurse here— Lion, 3mil33 (that’s emiliee but with 3’a for the e 😅), xolotl
Royal Stray 6 months ago
Xlotol is the Aztec God of fire and lightning, and also what axolotls are named after
#34
Saryahsys. Pronounced “psoriasis”
#35
Everlastingbreathoflife…
#38
Kid at my son’s preschool named rooster 😅
#39
Fresh. Moon Star. Twins Feloneigh and Arson. Twins Amir Shamir and the other was Shamir Amir. 🤣🤣🤣
Lois Matelan 6 months ago
I knew brothers--not twins--whose names were Isidore (pronounced Izz- ih-door) and Isidore (pronounced I--zih-door).
#40
narwhal…his name was narwhal
#42
Seventh baby, named him Seven
Tucker Cahooter 6 months ago
D**n you, George Costanza, for putting this idea into people's heads!
#43
Renesmee 😂 could NOT believe my eyes
Upstaged75 6 months ago (edited)
That may be the worst one of them all! :) It's the name of the half-vampire kid from Twilight.
#44
Candida….I BEG people to research names before giving them to your children lol
#45
Meg and Tyra - short for Megalodon and tyrannosaurus
MicrowaveGoddess 6 months ago
...is it bad I kinda like it? Not as legal names, but as a family joke.
#46
Mom let the dad pick the middle name. First name was something normal like Ethan. Middle name was Jamaicanmecrazy.
Royal Stray 6 months ago
You probably shouldn't name your kid something that could get them reported or punched in the face
#47
Drahoolie and Drahailey
Nicole Weymann 6 months ago
I feel like I'm missing a joke here. Can anyone please explain the reference? (Google was no help)
#49
teacher here I had triplets, Lincoln, Mercedes, and Bentley. I also had twins Bert and Ernie
#50
Twins- Justice & Liberty (the parents were lawyers) I found it kinda cute
#52
Kyleena - cuz she heard it on the IUD commercial and liked it
ElfVibratorGlitter 6 months ago (edited)
For what it's worth, a lot of birth control is named after women's names. I was on Yasmin for years
#53
Stryker… because dad was praying for the baby and as he had his head down he opened his eyes and saw the name “Stryker” on the moms hospital bed. Mom heard the name and thought it was beautiful.
#54
Had a baby named Spooki. Mom and dad were “spooked” when he came 6 weeks early. Also have had a: Sire, twins named Orangejello and Lemonjello, and a yourhighness.
Beth Wheeler 6 months ago
I worked with a Radiology tech that knows Orangejello and. Lemonjello. Pronounced Ohran gello. And Leman hello. It's the closest I can think of how to spell the pronunciation.
#55
LightOfTheGod. That was their first name.
#56
Twins: Donwanna and Doneeda… last name Mann (two moms)
Upstaged75 6 months ago
This sounds like another urban legend like the Jell-O Twins and LaDasha (spelled La - A).
#57
“Ssst” Four S’s and a T. Forest🙄
Tucker Cahooter 6 months ago
Reads more like a cryptic crossword clue. You've misspelled their name anyway.
#59
Rho'tavious (sounds like rotavirus) 😂
Bi.Felicia 6 months ago
I disagree, it doesn't sound like rotavirus to me. I believe it's pronounced like row-tay-vee-us. Not row-toe-vy-rus.
#60
Jkmn but pronounced Noel
Upstaged75 6 months ago
No L. As in the L is missing from that sequence of letters. Another urban legend.
#61
Prince my lord and savior (this was just the ‘first’ name) 🤐
#63
Abcde pronounced ab-se-dah
#64
Michael Scott. First name Michael second name Scott. They had never heard of the office
#65
La-a. Pronounced Ladasha…😅
Upstaged75 6 months ago
Yeah, no. This one's an urban legend. And don't try to tell me your cousin's best friend's dog groomer knew her.
What do you think ?
ElfVibratorGlitter 6 months ago
My partner and I are putting together baby names for our sprout. None of these are going on there.😂 Poor kids. 😬
Patrick H 6 months ago
Please, don't name them using any part of your username, either. 😝
Load More Replies... Forrest Grump 6 months ago
When I was in the military, I worked with a person named Sergeant Sergeant. We also had a squadron officer named Captain Major.
Damned_Cat 6 months ago
I worked with a lady that used to be the birth certificate registrar at a hospital. She heard a lot of awful names, but the worst was when a dad wanted to name his twin sons $hithead and Dumb@ss. When the lady refused to accept those names, the mother said just call them Nada and Nothing because that's how much she cared. After a word with the hospital social worker, those babies did not go home with their parents.
Lorna Fraser 6 months ago
I taught primary (elementary) and had a boy in my class named Pajama. Pronounced Pay Jah May
Peeka_Mimi 6 months ago
Now I hate my grandson's middle name less, it's Kenobi. We call him Nobi but at school they use his first name, Alex.
Fullo Shit 6 months ago
At least his first name isn't Obiwan(I know the spelling is wrong😁). But could have been Ben
Load More Replies...
Tonyah Mcanelly 6 months ago
I work at a dealership and One of our customers name was Diamond Princess
Bob Jones 6 months ago (edited)
Kid in my kids class had an indigenous name. It was very long and hard to pronounce and spelling was complex and didn't reflect the pronunciation in English. Not a problem, except that the parents insisted that the full name get used at all times and not any shortening. So this kid had a name that noone could pronounce, read or spell
SheamusFanFrom1987 6 months ago
If I'm getting married, daughter's name will be Meg and son will be Tim-me (pronounced Timmy). Full names: MEGatron and opTIMus priME XP XD
Suby 1 month ago
Angel. Not exactly an unusual name. I've taught a lot of them, boys and girls. It seems to put a lot of pressure on them. In my experience, they're either the total opposite, or they live up to the name, but have some kind of learning disability. It's weird how they fall into one of the two categories.
Börje Strömming 2 months ago
Land of the free, to name your child anything dumb name you want🫡🇺🇸🦅
At Least I'm Not You 5 months ago
It's sad that we all know the race of every single unfortunate child on this list. Perhaps it's more telling of a lack of education, but we'd still be at least half right on the race.
GlitterPanda 6 months ago
Some of these are 100% fake...like, they were part of old Vaudeville sketches and have been making the rounds ever since. That being said, I did go to school with a kid named George McGeorge and have since had students with very questionable names in the past few years
Lorna Fraser 6 months ago
I taught primary (elementary) school and had a boy named Pajama - pronounced Pay Jah May
Jelena Putinja 6 months ago
we had high school teacher named Jagoda Krema - 1st name Strawberry last name Cream and there was girl named Vesela Lešina - 1st name Happy last name Carcass
Lady Eowyn 6 months ago
These poor kids. Don't parents give any thought to what names like that will do to the kids? Some will have trouble learning simply to spell their name. Always having to tell people how to spell and pronounce their name. Waiting desperately to be old enough to legally change it.
tracy black 6 months ago
if it werent such a hassle having to change everything over i would change my name in a heartbeat i have always always hated my name
Rika 6 months ago
French couple calling their daughter Fleur (meaning "flower" in French) Not a terrible name... until you find out that their last name is Deschamps (literally meaning "from the fields" in French, but "fleur des champs" as an expression means "wildflower") Whenever names come up in the conversation at the family dinner, we wonder how "Flower from the fields/wildflower" is doing as an adult because my family lost contact with that couple many years ago, but legally changing your name is nearly impossible in France, the poor girl probably still has to use that name. The kicker ? Her parents aren't hippies at all, they're very much in the corporate world and had plans for her to become a lawyer... while being named Wildflower.
ElfVibratorGlitter 6 months ago
My partner and I are putting together baby names for our sprout. None of these are going on there.😂 Poor kids. 😬
Patrick H 6 months ago
Please, don't name them using any part of your username, either. 😝
Load More Replies... Forrest Grump 6 months ago
When I was in the military, I worked with a person named Sergeant Sergeant. We also had a squadron officer named Captain Major.
Damned_Cat 6 months ago
I worked with a lady that used to be the birth certificate registrar at a hospital. She heard a lot of awful names, but the worst was when a dad wanted to name his twin sons $hithead and Dumb@ss. When the lady refused to accept those names, the mother said just call them Nada and Nothing because that's how much she cared. After a word with the hospital social worker, those babies did not go home with their parents.
Lorna Fraser 6 months ago
I taught primary (elementary) and had a boy in my class named Pajama. Pronounced Pay Jah May
Peeka_Mimi 6 months ago
Now I hate my grandson's middle name less, it's Kenobi. We call him Nobi but at school they use his first name, Alex.
Fullo Shit 6 months ago
At least his first name isn't Obiwan(I know the spelling is wrong😁). But could have been Ben
Load More Replies... Tonyah Mcanelly 6 months ago
I work at a dealership and One of our customers name was Diamond Princess
Bob Jones 6 months ago (edited)
Kid in my kids class had an indigenous name. It was very long and hard to pronounce and spelling was complex and didn't reflect the pronunciation in English. Not a problem, except that the parents insisted that the full name get used at all times and not any shortening. So this kid had a name that noone could pronounce, read or spell
SheamusFanFrom1987 6 months ago
If I'm getting married, daughter's name will be Meg and son will be Tim-me (pronounced Timmy). Full names: MEGatron and opTIMus priME XP XD
Suby 1 month ago
Angel. Not exactly an unusual name. I've taught a lot of them, boys and girls. It seems to put a lot of pressure on them. In my experience, they're either the total opposite, or they live up to the name, but have some kind of learning disability. It's weird how they fall into one of the two categories.
Börje Strömming 2 months ago
Land of the free, to name your child anything dumb name you want🫡🇺🇸🦅
At Least I'm Not You 5 months ago
It's sad that we all know the race of every single unfortunate child on this list. Perhaps it's more telling of a lack of education, but we'd still be at least half right on the race.
GlitterPanda 6 months ago
Some of these are 100% fake...like, they were part of old Vaudeville sketches and have been making the rounds ever since. That being said, I did go to school with a kid named George McGeorge and have since had students with very questionable names in the past few years
Lorna Fraser 6 months ago
I taught primary (elementary) school and had a boy named Pajama - pronounced Pay Jah May
Jelena Putinja 6 months ago
we had high school teacher named Jagoda Krema - 1st name Strawberry last name Cream and there was girl named Vesela Lešina - 1st name Happy last name Carcass
Lady Eowyn 6 months ago
These poor kids. Don't parents give any thought to what names like that will do to the kids? Some will have trouble learning simply to spell their name. Always having to tell people how to spell and pronounce their name. Waiting desperately to be old enough to legally change it.
tracy black 6 months ago
if it werent such a hassle having to change everything over i would change my name in a heartbeat i have always always hated my name
Rika 6 months ago
French couple calling their daughter Fleur (meaning "flower" in French) Not a terrible name... until you find out that their last name is Deschamps (literally meaning "from the fields" in French, but "fleur des champs" as an expression means "wildflower") Whenever names come up in the conversation at the family dinner, we wonder how "Flower from the fields/wildflower" is doing as an adult because my family lost contact with that couple many years ago, but legally changing your name is nearly impossible in France, the poor girl probably still has to use that name. The kicker ? Her parents aren't hippies at all, they're very much in the corporate world and had plans for her to become a lawyer... while being named Wildflower.
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