Some secrets are bigger than others. No matter how open and honest we might think we are, there are still some things that we prefer to keep to ourselves. After all, people are social beings, and our reputations, as well as being accepted, are vital. Naturally, wanting to fit in, we keep some information about ourselves to ourselves.
Inspired by user u/BoredHypnotist, the anonymous members of the r/AskReddit community revealed the most ‘socially unacceptable’ facts about themselves. These are things that anyone would have a hard time mentioning in public. Scroll down to see what kinds of secrets some folks have. It’s also a reminder for all of us to learn to be less judgmental and kinder to each other.
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I am a woman who is willingly sterilized.
Why do people think this is socially unacceptable? It's a very logical course of action if you know you don't want to have any (any more) children, or being pregnant/giving birth would damage your health etc. It's not the sort of thing a person can do without thought and consideration.
I don’t take care of my hygiene as much as I should. Especially when it comes to showering and brushing my teeth. It’s not that I don’t care, but depression makes it hard as hell sometimes.
Hang in there. Hoping you can get some therapy to help you feel better.
Judging others is never going to go away. It’s something that human beings do on both conscious and automatic levels. Analyzing the behavior of the people around us is a way to recognize how we ourselves (do not) fit into our social groups. Used sparingly to make us look at our values and actions more objectively, social judgments can push us to make more positive decisions that end up being good for us and our social group.
However, there’s a darker side to making these social judgments. Some folks judge other people to feel better about themselves, hide their own flaws, or fit into society at the cost of someone else’s reputation. This sort of exclusionary behavior might make you feel safer yourself, but it can also end up destroying relationships and ostracizing individuals.
I’m a 38 year old man who sleeps with stuffed animals.
I don’t like talking. It’s not that I’m afraid to talk, I just prefer to stay quiet most of the time. Unfortunately, we live in a world that requires you to talk a lot if you want to make connections.
I'm very very happy to get home after work and stay in bed for the rest of the day, most days of the week.
Even though we have free will, it would be naive to think that we have control over everything that happens to us. Sure, taking responsibility for our actions can empower us. That being said, there are so many things outside our control that we can’t really do anything about. It’s important to be honest with ourselves about what we can realistically affect with our actions.
For one, we cannot determine the circumstances of our birth, how we were raised, and what our genetics are. However, many people are judgmental of folks born into broken homes or who have a predisposition to mental health issues. Criticizing someone for their family‘s choices, upbringing, or genetic quirks is unfair. However, someone who’s doing their best to improve their circumstances and fight back against the problems they’ve been handed by (bad) luck is worthy of praise.
I ignore texts and calls. It starts with "I'll respond later" and then after awhile I feel like it's been too long to reply so I don't. It's not malicious but I assume it feels that way to others.
I have Tourette's, including coprolalia/swearing tics. I'm very lucky though, because I seem to fit in pretty well in restaurant kitchens, and I love that line of work 😄.
I have no friends and am comfortable being alone. Prepared to die that way too :D.
Things like attitudes and opinions are within our power to change, however, we might feel uncomfortable doing so just to fit in with the rest of our social group. It would feel like we’re betraying our deepest values if we did so. At the same time, having completely different beliefs than the majority of your social circle can make life very difficult. This might be why some folks choose to hide their true feelings—they don’t want to face rejection or take part in countless arguments.
What kind of behavior is deemed socially (un)acceptable is going to depend entirely on your culture and social circle. Something celebrated in your hometown might be seen as bizarre in a big city or even downright ‘shameful’ in another country.
I had a baby at 17, got pregnant again a few years later, and could not afford another child. My sibling, who could not have children, adopted my baby.
As long as you, your sibling and the kids are happy now, I see no problem whatsoever
I have no idea how to manage friendships.
I have friends and I'm friendly....
But sometimes I forget to text back and if they don't call or re text I could go months with no contact.
Unless I find something funny to share then I'm sending it to everyone.
I like candy corn.
I have been known to eat circus peanuts, you know the marshmallow confection that comes pre-stale in a bag.
Social norms change over time, too. Behaviors that seem odd to us now might have been perfectly fine decades or even centuries ago. On the flip side, what was once judged in the past might be mundanely accepted in this day and age. Social norms aren’t static. While we can guess what might be deemed acceptable in the future, we can never be certain—cultures can change in very unpredictable ways.
If you feel like opening up anonymously, why not share the most socially unacceptable facts about yourselves, dear Pandas? What do you think we can all do to be less judgmental and more accepting of other people? Has anyone revealed a secret about themselves that fundamentally changed how you looked at them? Tell us all about it in the comments.
That I come off as “cold” when I’m not masking
But man….sometimes I really am tired of masking. My reactions feel so fake to me and I can’t stand it. But everyone else seems to love it so…whatever ig.
I used to practice facial expressions as a child because i was always told i was robotic and expressionless(by my parents, no less) and studied how the popular kids at school acted so i could make friends. i think i’m autistic but i’m scared sometimes that people would just assume i’m a psychopath.
my parents told me i am expressionless more like cold because i hardly smile, i've had lectures from my parents, relatives, heck even a teacher once. My friends even told me that they taught i would be a bully when we first met. i consider smiling for no reason a chore, especially when i have to do it because i'm forced, but i can't help it
I'm a girl and I grow out my leg hair due to being harassed by an 80 year old man who said I had "pretty legs" when I was 11, so I guess I decided that just never going to happen again.
I would deliberately pretend that i don’t hear people calling me or asking me stuff in social situations. Also in a crowd when people are chitchatting in a circle, i zone out if im not interested.
I'm just like you, You're just like me...it's something anyone can see
Being borderline sociopathic for a profession
I've become "jaded" to seeing death, the mentally perturbed, physically traumatic injuries that you would only see in movies, even the downright depressing scenes, the list goes on.
The type of things people should only have to witness behind their screens or even only once in there life; I've adjusted to seeing in person on a weekly basis. It's to the point I can't call myself normal as I end up laughing to the most f****d up jokes.
Call it dark humor or a "coping mechanism" but if the event just happened, normal people would be mortified.
Its a bittersweet profession as a paramedic with high call volumes. I get a peek into everyones emergencies when they're at their lowest and often times these calls rub off on us (even the bs calls), but at the end of the day when s**t hits the fan, It's their emergency and not ours.
Better yet we have a hand in helping them physically and mentally. I have to tell people their loved ones are gone, but I get to convey it in the best way to let them heal the fastest. I have people who try to commit s*****e, but I get to save them when they or a loved one makes the call. I have people living the s**ttiest day of their life, but knowing it would've been their last if I hadn't came, makes it worthwhile.
I’ll leave. I’ll just go home and love it.
My parents are cousins. Nobody (outside the family) knows.
No adverse effect on the kids (although I AM on Reddit a lot…).
I was one of the last kids to have ever been a patient in an insane asylum here in the US. The one I was in closed down in 1993.
I'm fat.
I hate working but that doesn’t mean i’m lazy. I live my life by doing a bunch of side huddles and love it. I make about $10k/year but I have everything i need: food, shelter, and a wonderful community. I “work” about two months a year but otherwise i lay on the beach with a joint in my hand and a cat on my lap.
I'm autistic, and nine times out of ten i forgot that when people ask me for my opinion or input on something that they actually want the opinion that caters to theirs.
I have taken human lives. Sure, during military service, but just the same.
I did a combat tour, and never once fired my weapon in anger. I am much more glad of that now than I was then.
I stare blankly a lot during conversations. Like as if I'm zoned out, but I'm paying full attention. Especially if it's a particularly long conversation, I just can't be bothered to keep up with constant eye contact.
Same, except eye contact, i can't keep eye contact to save my life even with close people
I’m a double dipper.
I am, too. My go to method, though, is dipping the opposite side of whatever if I'm sharing the dip.
But your hands! Are they clean? Did you breathe on the chip?
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DUDE. I HAVE TAKEN PEANUT BUTTER OUT OF A JAR WITH MY FINGERS, BUT I SWITCH FINGERS AT LEAST!!
I will.if I am with very few close friends and as long as they don't mind. If I am in a bigger group and sharing a bigger bowl I will only single dip. Some people don't like sharing germs.
I was in a mental health hospital and I still have regular emotional breakdowns.
I hope you have access to help and support when you need it. ((virtual hugs))
I always have a b***h face but the second someone smiles at me, my whole minute was made.
dude my default facial expression is a cold face, and even my happy or angry or annoyed reactions are minimal, people who are close to me are the ones who actually notice, but i still smile a lot though
I am a people pleaser and have learned how to chameleon into almost any social situation. I don’t know who I am so my dating life is: becoming acceptable and try to be the perfect person to my partner so they fall in love with me, then I break and say this isn’t working for me, leaving them in ruins. I hate myself for it but I don’t know how to connect otherwise.
I hate certain movies,TV shows, and music for no real reason other than it being popular. It causes me to get really angry when music I hate comes on, in fact I've grown such a distaste for modern country that I get headaches from listening to it.
I've been slowly learning to accept that some people have tastes different from mine and that I shouldn't be mad at them or the content they enjoy.
I hate a lot of things for no reason whatsoever. I also hate things because they are popular
I don't like my Mum.
Different human beings have different personalities. There are plenty of people in the world who are not bad people but don't have any common interest with me and we just don't vibe so we are just not friends and don't hang out often. That includes people in my family. We go to events together and we are friendly to each other, but we don't have to "like" each other. Blood relation isn't a magical connection for everyone.
If I don’t like someone (never a prejudiced opinion), I sometimes make it very apparent by being cold towards them. Not something I’m very proud of.
Can't stand body hair. From shoulders down, anything not visible is gone. Only keep what's visible because I don't want to be made fun of by strangers. Hate it though. Ashamed that I prefer myself without, because I feel less of a "socially acceptable" male.
It was a game-changer for me. For years I bought into the whole "urgh people who want to get rid of body hair are paedophiles" but since getting rid of certain areas I can say my little sensory overloaded lizard brain is pretty happy about it. I just wish it wasn't so damn expensive/painful!
I love passively snooping if people have their s**t exposed. I also hide my phone and desktop activities from everyone instinctively.
the desktop one is so relatable, i delete my computer history as soon as i'm done with it, all my folders are hidden and you can only get to it with my permission and for what reason, i am not hiding anything that could get me in trouble or anything
I'm 16 years old, I'm going to college next year, and I've never walked outside of my house alone. Not even to go to the store or someone's house. I didn't even have keys to my house until this year and I still don't know how to use them well.Obviously I go to school alone or go out with my friends by taxi, but I mean that I have never walked on the street, from one place to another, alone. And honestly I'm terrified of doing it. I don't know if I'm not very independent for my age or if I'm simply a teenage girl in a third world country, but if you told me, for example"Walk from your house to the park" or "go from the mall to the gym on foot" I simply couldn't do it.
Children need to learn independence, in a safe manner. Parents aren't protecting their children by cocooning them in bubble wrap, they are making stunted adults. For this 16 year old, I'd suggest they walk to where they stop feeling comfortable, and then just stop, and slowly count to 10. The next day, come to the same place, and take another few steps, repeat. Slowly increase distance. Then do it again starting in other places.
I don't like to be around dogs at all. I worked in PetSmart for 7 years and being around literally 100+ dogs every shift got me to where I can't stand the smell and the noise. I don't hate dogs, they can't help but be what they are, it's just that every normal, natural behavior in dogs really just bugs the c**p out of me.
I still help people with dog behavior issues to this day, I just don't want to have a dog or live with one.
You'll probably offend more people with this than saying "I hate babies" but it's your right to like or dislike whatever you want.
I own a reasonably large amount of comic book themed statues. And like, the big ones, that are two feet tall.
I don't respect and not even like my parents, in a good day I tolerate them. I am doing what I can to move asap after college and pretend they don't exist.
I'm a guy and I'm absolutely s**t at making money. I never have enough of it and everyone in life thinks lesser of me because of it.
That I’ve hung out with d**g dealers and super, super sketchy people and actually kind of liked those people. Also that I drank a s**t ton of alcohol starting when I was 12.
There was a time in my life I spent time around people like this and it was the first time I ever felt like I wasn’t being judged for being myself.
When I want to lose weight, I just starve myself and drink water and eat vitamin gummies. Sometimes I lose like 50lbs in 3 months with no exercise. I do not exercise, and my calorie intake is like below 600. Everyone constantly says that's not good for you. I feel fine, and if I feel really bad I just have a cheat day and I eat two medium pizzas from Pizza Hut. And then I just continue to do it. Maybe I'm just built different, maybe it's Maybelline.
I kink-shame.
When i feel bad i leave and don’t come back until i’m okay.
I make too much eye contact. I’ve been practicing looking away.
Opposite here: I avoid eye contact as much as possible (In a society that considers that as rude)
That I was in a gang for many years.
I hate peanut butter.
I also despise peanut butter but on the contrary, i love roasted groundnuts or as americans say peanut but not raw ones
I'm part of an occasional throuple. We spend a couple of weekends a month together as well as occasional nights and we go on holiday together. Apart from that we have our own separate lives and relationships. It has worked perfectly well for the last 10 years.
As long as the relationships outside the throuple are aware and don't mind, nothing wrong with it
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A lot of these posts are things that a very large amount of people do/say/think/feel, but just don't talk about. I'll chime in with mine cause why not. I downvote every political comments I see if it's on a non-politically centered article, regardless if what is said is stuff I agree or disagree with. It's unnecessary to make a politically driven comment on an article that isn't centered around such topics.
One socially unacceptable thing in the hispanic community is cutting toxic family out of your life. Family means everything in the hispanic culture/community. Cutting toxic family out of your life is sometimes necessary for your own mental health but people still look down on you for not putting up with it cause they are family you know.
I grew up as a life and soul of the party guy, I enjoyed leadership roles, I was gregarious. Mental health crashed, I lost my marriage, I attempted suicide more than once, I lost all of my confidence and hid away like a hermit. Now I’ve lost that gregarious character I haven’t a clue who I am or how to function around people. I have zero motivation and I’ve zero ambition. My meds keep me alive and I’m a great actor, no one would know if I was good, bad or indifferent underneath, I just play the role that’s expected of me, I’m not sure who I am or how to be the ‘right’ me.
That suсks like a motherfuсker :( But you're here, and we like you.
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I am indifferent to cats. I don’t hate them, I’m never mean to them, I just don’t care about them even a little. I find them boring and I don’t understand why people love them so much. I get that people do - I’m *not* criticizing that, I just don’t understand it. I do like dogs, but not enough to have one, so it’s not like I’m a super dog, anti-cat person.
I don't like cats. I don't hate them, abuse them, or neglect them, I just don't like them. I don't understand the draw. Kittens are cute and fun to watch, but once they grow up, I'm not interested.
Load More Replies... I am one of these monsters who take their shoes off in airplanes.
As long as you’re wearing socks, I see no problem. I do the same. But no socks? That’s 🤮- for everyone! I don’t want my bare feet on gross airplane carpet (also they’d freeze)
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i dont like being around groups of people for to long it starts to feel overwhelming for me
social phobia or ASD. Get checked. PS you are ok, just different.
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Is anyone else unable to read these posts? I'm on the Bored Panda app, and it shows only one line of text above the photo. I have to guess what the rest of the post says...haha.
That was happening to me too. I had to go to chrome and stop using the app. I even took the time to actually complain to them BP has done nothing to fix it. Which sucks bc when you use the web instead of the app the lag from their quadrillion adds is worse.
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I don't relate to people and I can never put myself in their situation unless it has happened to me. For example, my partner's father died and I didn't know how to feel or how to comfort her as my parents are both still alive. I feign interest in other people's lives so that it doesn't seem rude but I'd rather never ask any questions in the first place.
I'm part of an occasional throuple. We spend a couple of weekends a month together as well as occasional nights and we go on holiday together. Apart from that we have our own separate lives and relationships. It has worked perfectly well for the last 10 years.
As long as the relationships outside the throuple are aware and don't mind, nothing wrong with it
Load More Replies... A lot of these posts are things that a very large amount of people do/say/think/feel, but just don't talk about. I'll chime in with mine cause why not. I downvote every political comments I see if it's on a non-politically centered article, regardless if what is said is stuff I agree or disagree with. It's unnecessary to make a politically driven comment on an article that isn't centered around such topics.
One socially unacceptable thing in the hispanic community is cutting toxic family out of your life. Family means everything in the hispanic culture/community. Cutting toxic family out of your life is sometimes necessary for your own mental health but people still look down on you for not putting up with it cause they are family you know.
I grew up as a life and soul of the party guy, I enjoyed leadership roles, I was gregarious. Mental health crashed, I lost my marriage, I attempted suicide more than once, I lost all of my confidence and hid away like a hermit. Now I’ve lost that gregarious character I haven’t a clue who I am or how to function around people. I have zero motivation and I’ve zero ambition. My meds keep me alive and I’m a great actor, no one would know if I was good, bad or indifferent underneath, I just play the role that’s expected of me, I’m not sure who I am or how to be the ‘right’ me.
That suсks like a motherfuсker :( But you're here, and we like you.
Load More Replies... I am indifferent to cats. I don’t hate them, I’m never mean to them, I just don’t care about them even a little. I find them boring and I don’t understand why people love them so much. I get that people do - I’m *not* criticizing that, I just don’t understand it. I do like dogs, but not enough to have one, so it’s not like I’m a super dog, anti-cat person.
I don't like cats. I don't hate them, abuse them, or neglect them, I just don't like them. I don't understand the draw. Kittens are cute and fun to watch, but once they grow up, I'm not interested.
Load More Replies... I am one of these monsters who take their shoes off in airplanes.
As long as you’re wearing socks, I see no problem. I do the same. But no socks? That’s 🤮- for everyone! I don’t want my bare feet on gross airplane carpet (also they’d freeze)
Load More Replies... i dont like being around groups of people for to long it starts to feel overwhelming for me
social phobia or ASD. Get checked. PS you are ok, just different.
Load More Replies... Is anyone else unable to read these posts? I'm on the Bored Panda app, and it shows only one line of text above the photo. I have to guess what the rest of the post says...haha.
That was happening to me too. I had to go to chrome and stop using the app. I even took the time to actually complain to them BP has done nothing to fix it. Which sucks bc when you use the web instead of the app the lag from their quadrillion adds is worse.
Load More Replies... I don't relate to people and I can never put myself in their situation unless it has happened to me. For example, my partner's father died and I didn't know how to feel or how to comfort her as my parents are both still alive. I feign interest in other people's lives so that it doesn't seem rude but I'd rather never ask any questions in the first place.
