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There comes a time in every person’s life when they are forced to reconcile the fact that, actually, what they think is entirely normal doesn’t represent how the average person operates. If one happens to not be neurologically typical, then this might be the list for you.
Someone made a post stating “Neurodivergent folks, what’s a symptom you thought was normal until you realized it absolutely wasn’t?” and people shared their best examples. Note, many of the things here can be attributed to neurodivergence, but are not exclusive to it. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to write down and obsess over your own examples in the comments below.
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#1
When people tell me a story, I tell them a similar story to try to relate. Ppl don’t like that they think I’m trying to make it about myself when I’m trying to empathize.
Zig Zag Wanderer 1 day ago (edited)
This is so incredibly common. I tried hard to stop doing this decades ago, thinking I was being egotistical. I only recently discovered that all neurodivergents do it to some extent. It made me feel better.
Tinkershark 1 day ago
To those who struggle with this, this helped me: they were asking you to share a burden they felt too weak to carry alone in that moment, instead we shared ours back. Picture them carrying a bag full of rocks, falling down, and asking if some of their rocks can temporarily go in your bag as they are feeling too weak to carry them all. You respond by saying "we have so much in common because my bag is heavy too! Will you take some of my rocks while I take some of yours?". That misses the point of what they needed, right? They might have happily helped carry your rocks in a different moment, but right now they feel weak and asked for your help. Giving them some of our rocks isn't kind or connecting.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I can't stop doing this! I try but it feels so intuitive and I don't know what else to say to show empathy other than the awkward, "I feel you" or "I'm sorry that must feel...." None of which are good things to say. I want to feel connections with others so I assume they want the same thing but people would prefer to feel special to the point of having nothing in common?
Tamra 1 day ago
I find that people just want to feel seen and heard, truly heard. Saying "I feel you" or "I'm sorry, that must feel..." aren't bad things to say. It's a way of validating the other person's feelings.
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SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
Me. Now I feel even worse, but I’m not sure why. Shouldn’t I feel better?
Laserleader 1 hour ago
Its even harder when you work in NDA based industries, because you can't talk about the people around you either, so the only stories have to be about yourself.
James Blanken 2 hours ago
I learned this one recently. It explained a lot about why I didn't get second days very much, lol.
Christina Eulenbach 2 hours ago
Thats very much about HOW you do it. I hate it so much, when people make it then about them, when I tried to share a problem and seek comfort and then Im the one giving it... And many people do it this way. When i for example would say "i got bullied today..." and then you say "oh, thats s**t... i know how it feels. Once i was in school I got bullied too (shares a short story)" - that is nice! But dont make it about YOU when I tried to get help or comfort.
RELATED:
#2
Constantly googling things when I don't know. It boggles my mind that people don't know something and then just keep moving through life not knowing.....
DH 1 day ago (edited)
You are right. This is just a personality trait, nohing more.
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Crystalwitch60 1 day ago
Normal , we do not know it all ! So if we don’t know being able to look on google is the best way 🤷♀️defo not to do with nd at all
BK BigFish 1 day ago
As you grow older, you will realize that "ignorant, and content to stay that way" is kind of the default status of the world. If people were intellectually curious and honest (haha), almost all religions would disappear, racism and sexism and war and human-induced famine would be gone, we'd all have universal healthcare, the rich would be properly taxed, and vaccines and teachers would be honored rather than vilified. Madness!
9zdsfwdk7w 2 hours ago
I thought everyone did this!! Sometimes I lose track of time looking stuff up.
#3
Not hating showering itself but hating the task initiation.
For Work 1 day ago
It's common for many, even those who are not divergent to hate transition- we dislike getting in the shower, out of the shower, getting into bed, getting out of bed, etc.
Crystalwitch60 1 day ago
Very , also bathrooms are only cold if you don’t have heating in there , I have a rad via a air source heat pump housing assoc put in , ( they are NOT CHEAP TO USE 🤬) but it does keep the bathroom warm ,
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Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
Getting in the shower: ugh. Being in the shower: yay. Getting out of the shower: ugh.
Remi (He/Him) 1 day ago
I like to do this kind of pre start meaning I decide I'm going to do something in 15 minutes or 30 minutes and put on the alarm. Seems to help with procrastinating.
#4
Not actually “missing” many people or feeling the urge to talk to friends or anyone besides the people you’re around everyday. People are like out of sight out of mind.
Tinkershark 1 day ago
I have found setting phone reminders helps. If possible maybe go through your phone calendar and set reminders on certain days at hours you aren't likely to be busy so you could check in as soon as the alarm goes? I understand it is not plausible for every situation and I don't know yours, but perhaps worth a shot? It doesn't mean we don't care that some of us need the extra planning, we didn't choose how we are wired, all we can do is know we care and try to work with what we have. Wishing you and your family as well as possible
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Corbmi 1 day ago
I think this relates to object permanence. I've warned my friends / family over the years that I'm not ignoring them but they just don't exist when I'm not around them. Many, many of them felt insulted. Whoopsie.
Alewa 21 hours ago
Object permanence is the ability to know that objects are there if even if you can't currently perceive them. It is a major milestone in toddler development.
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Earthquake903 1 day ago
I do this. Moved from the deep south to the PNW. I do not miss anyone.
Zombie Andrew 1 day ago
Im ADD/RSD so caught in the constant loop of "I want to be ALONE!" and "Im LONELY, where IS everyone?!"
SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
My whole family is like this. Are we all neurodivergent? I always thought we were just less close than most families.
RM 1 day ago
I have to have birthdays both on a calendar on the wall and on my phone just so I remember to call people on them. Sometimes there is even a post it note stuck to the fridge that says call x. Out of sight, out of mind is about right - it doesn't occur to me to check in with people, to call just because, but I always put it down to the fact I am just not a social person.
Crystalwitch60 1 day ago
Ok this isn’t ND this is introvert stuff. I love being on my own the peace , being housebound has brilliant advantages lol, no one around bar my two kids n their partners , beingveryrua also helps , it just mean WE DONT LIKE PEOPLE ,that isnt ND !
Natalie Kelsey 9 hours ago
For many people that's probably true. But for others it's about object permanence. I'm not at all introverted, I love people but I have ADHD, so.
Load More Replies... Laserleader 1 hour ago
I love my friends, I just only see them a handful of times a year. I cant focus on anyone not in my immediate need circle.
#5
Always needing to know “why” and doing extensive deep research about random things only to completely lose interest a month or two later.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
Story of my life! But the diversity of my random knowledge is both impressive and concerning.
Dirk Daring 1 day ago
I think part of this is that once I've looked up the WHY of something, and it makes sense, I can let go and just accept that there EXISTS a "why" of it. No need to hang on to the details, I am satisfied that there was some underlying logic supporting whatever it was I was looking up.
#6
I replay conversations I have with people in my head.. to try to determine if said the appropriate thing and I totally over analyze it. It can be exhausting...
Zombie Andrew 1 day ago
WORSE is playing out FUTURE conversations, those that haven't even HAPPENED yet, and doing this
mandy the capibara 1 day ago
True, but I think a lot of neurodivergent traits are quite common, but the intensity of it, or the ability of a person to deal with it are very different.
Load More Replies... Crystalwitch60 1 day ago
Yup do it all the time ! Again normal , could I have said it better did this come across right , so that next time u get it right ,
Little Bit 1 day ago
I replay conversations I had 20 years ago in my head and wonder how different things could have been if I had said something different.
#7
Hating obligations, they stress me out. Even fun ones.
#8
Clearing my ENTIRE day to get ready for an event at 7pm.
RM 1 day ago
I go the opposite way with this one - if I'm going to a Christmas party, for example, it takes me about half an hour to get ready. Takes longer to travel there than I spend prepping or getting ready.
Load More Replies... Corbmi 1 day ago
Am in that very spot right now; I'm scrolling BP instead of starting work I should have finished by now. My bosses are lucky to have me.
Load More Replies... Crystalwitch60 1 day ago
Nope not me , but if I have to go out the house say docs or a birthday mine of my kids ,I do spend two weeks before mentally preparing myself to do so , I can’t be around people what so ever (empath hearing everyone else’s emotions feeling their pain happiness etc is bloody evacuating ) but only tells me ten mins to get ready , I’d call that being very vain n high maintenance not ND
#9
Brain radio! I thought everyone else was hearing music on repeat inside their head. 😭
Corbmi 1 day ago
Mine only seems to work when I want to sleep, which is less fun at 2am and I have "if you like pina coladas" on repeat in my head. I've never even tried a pina colada. D**n you Rupert Holmes.
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TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I hate this soooo much! Sometimes it's worse than the endless dialogue in my head.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
It’s debilitating tbh, you’re trying to listen to someone while they’re yelling at you for being distracted but you end up distracting yourself as a random song you haven’t heard in years plays on loop in your head at a loud volume
Danielle Ale 2 hours ago
Mine hasn't stopped for 5 years, it really makes it hard to function
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Crystalwitch60 1 day ago
That’s called an ear worm ! Perfectly normal , if you have an active mind , it’s actually a good thing to , all b. Bloody annoying , when it’s a shite sing u have on loop 😂but perfectly normal ! I gotta say if all these from top down so far are signs of being ND we all in in trouble.
Littlemiss 1 day ago
I wake with a song playing with in my head, I have to look it up and find lyrics or it won't leave.
#10
Getting overwhelmed by environmental noise but always needing the right background noises.
Andrew Keir 1 day ago
I suspect that nobody ever truly understands anyone else's feelings, but how would we test? But everyone claims they do ...
Load More Replies... Stardust she/her 1 day ago
It is genuinely painful when there’s too much background noise, you feel like melting in that moment
Toujin C'Thlu 1 day ago
I like quiet, but absolute silence makes me feel like I'm in a horror movie
Robyn Hill 19 hours ago
OMG, this! If it’s something like a musical where the audience is applauding and cheering all at the same time, it’s fine - but if I’m a a coffee shop and there’s music in the background at a certain level, and several conversations going on quite loudly, my brain literally just shuts down. It tries to take it all in, and implodes.
Colleen Glim 1 day ago
No background noise except for the noise of the world continuing past outside my window. I work retail. My world is nothing but people and noise. I can’t even with that when I get home
Crystalwitch60 1 day ago
Both me n my daughter are like this , but it’s normal , some like us just like peace , we couldn’t live in a town or city for eg , I get very easily overwhelmed int busy places , to much noise (other people’s emotions feelings etc it’s way to much ) n my daughter just likes peace , to
Laserleader 1 hour ago (edited)
Have to block out the children at the nearby school, the chickens next door, and the shows other people in the house are watching.
Roni Stone 3 hours ago
An anxiety triggering issue in our house. We both yell "incoming!" if we are getting overwhelmed with auditory stimuli so we know to back off if we are adding to it.
#11
Having full conversations with myself in my head…
Colleen Glim 1 day ago
I have full conversations with myself out loud. Some days it’s my only means of having an intelligent conversation
Zombie Andrew 1 day ago
same, and because it's so distracting, when someone asks me "what did you say?" My BRAIN says "was THINKING out loud" but my MOUTH says 'was TALKIN out loud" ...like..yeah, that's how talking WORKS d*****s ..>SO embarassing
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James Blanken 2 hours ago
It's perfectly normal to talk to yourself. It's perfectly normal to respond to yourself. But when you start interrupting yourself then you have a problem. Lol.
Roni Stone 3 hours ago
With my therapist. Me thinking both sides of the issue. My best therapy sessions have been alone in my car or my house. But I also speak my inner monologue aloud.
Natalie Kelsey 9 hours ago
It's fine once in awhile but when it becomes ruminating or it happens with the same person over and over I get tired of it
#12
I don’t know if there’s a word for it but just thoughts ALL the time about seemingly everything. If I’m interacting with someone I’m thinking about the way I’m sitting or standing, what they think of me, if I’m responding normally, eye contact, that random thing that happened 10 yrs ago and made me feel bad, am I nodding too much?” It takes me out of the moment. Makes me wonder how ppl genuinely enjoy things for a prolonged amount of time.
Rick Murray 1 day ago
I find it mind blowing that people can have a period of "no thoughts". Like, you guys have an off switch?
Sue User 1 day ago
Tried meditating several times. Just can't not think of something.
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DC 9 hours ago
If we consider our thoughts to be read from and written into a book ... my book always lies by the window, and it's storming outside. In school, this became obvious for the first time. Nowadays, one would be diagnosed with ADD or ADHD, but back then, it was considered "lack of discipline", and I assumed that we all had to deal with this, I just wasn't as successful, or disciplined, as the other kids were. But, back then, this wasn't really en vogue, or downright unknown. In my first school, our teacher considered all boys to be evil-spirited, mean, violent, lazy and dumb, and two of us were her main targe. Getting us in trouble was rather easy - be a girl and accuse us of something. Anyway, I found a method to tune it into managable weather, the window not being wide open anymore, but only tilted by a few degrees, leaving a gap at the top. It's not Ritalin, it's something else. Plus, I learned how to learn (which works different for everybody) about halfway through university.
#13
Constant overthinking, ruminating, worrying, intrusive, racing thoughts. Until my 30s I thought everyone had the same & were just sailing through life not bothered by it.
Tabitha 1 day ago
TBH, there are some very unreflective, un-self aware people who should do it more, or for the first time.
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Papa 1 day ago
A lack of constant overthinking, ruminating, worrying, intrusive, and racing thoughts does not indicate an empty head.
Load More Replies... #14
Wanting friends but unable to keep them bc I can’t ever seem to truly like a person once I get to know them.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
The feeling always becomes mutual if I dare allow anyone to become more than a pleasant acquaintance.
#15
Object permanence, I don’t miss anyone or anything, is a struggle 😩
UnclFredstr:
Object permanence, especially with people. I can go months without communicating, and yet to me, when I do, it feels like just yesterday.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago (edited)
Yeah, this is hard for me to understand because I have it but I also have intense anxiety. Therefore I get incredibly anxious about future regrets for things I don't currently miss. It's a never-ending vicious cycle.
TheOGpandaHavana 5 hours ago
I'm just curious if you've ever been away from your kids for an extended period of time and if so, did the feeling of missing them disappear? I'm asking because it happens in reverse for me with my parents and I think they are the same because they don't contact me either but if we see each other then there is a short period where we miss each other and communicate but then it goes away and there's no feeling of missing (except my anxiety of missing them in the future when their gone gone).
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Rob Stevens 1 day ago
that's not what "object permanence" is. Object permanence is the ability to understand that objects still exist even if they are no longer visible.
#16
Forgetting a person's name straight after they've told you.
Corbmi 1 day ago
I had to occasionally work with two chaps at another company. When I met them, one of them said "My name is Stu, like stew" and then acted out the motion of stirring a large pot of stew. That was over 20 years ago and I still remember his name. The other chap's name I would forget often. His first name is the same as my own.
Andrew Keir 1 day ago
Maybe you learn better visually than aurally? Although, tbf, his sense of humour probably helps, too
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Laserleader 1 hour ago
Knowing one person with a name makes it stick, but once I get past 5 people with the same name I no longer associate the name with the people.
Bored Retsuko 1 day ago
Nope. I'm surprisingly good with names. What I can't remember is faces.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 1 day ago
I’m rubbish with both. Makes life very stressful!
Load More Replies... TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
At this time in my "professional life", I REALLY REALLY need/wish I had the ability to remember people's names. It takes me months (or never!). I'm also face blind fora long time but definitely not as long as with names.
Sue User 1 day ago
Curiously enough, remote work has helped because you see picture and name.
Load More Replies... #17
Getting genuinely obsessed with something for a period of time only to then drop it and start the process all over again with something else that caught your interest.
LillieMean 1 day ago
I'm a bipolar and I have a big shame box full of unfinished art projects, a bag of yarn balls and crochet projects I've started, and too many half-full notebooks.
[>.<]/ 1 day ago
I have given myself permission to let go of unfinished projects and just enjoy them while i'm working on them.
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Randomosity 1 day ago
I'm sometimes afraid to get obsessed with a fandom because I know I'll eventually lose interest and it could be months before I come back, maybe even longer.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
How much money have I spent on things I later lost interest in? 💸
SouthernGal 1 day ago
Items stored in my craft room are as revealing about my life as layers of the earth are to geologists.
DaisyBee 1 day ago
My max is like a week. Special shout out to knitting which didn’t even last 2 minutes
Marie 8 hours ago
Knitting is the only one that somewhat stuck and keeps coming back at least a couple weeks every year. But I've learned to keep the projects small.
Load More Replies... James Blanken 2 hours ago
This is huge for me. I love that initial feeling you get of learning something new, or learning about something new.
#18
Over explaining 😭😭 I need to keep everything short and sweet but then I feel like I’m not getting my point across good enough.
Zig Zag Wanderer 1 day ago (edited)
Because people ALWAYS get something about it wrong because they make assumptions. It's frustrating, and that's why I put as much information in the initial description as possible. Definitely makes it less easy to tell or understand, though, so it's counter-productive. Catch 22!
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
And then they think you are being argumentative when you're simply trying to clarify and communicate effectively! It makes me more bonkers than I already am!!
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Dee Hampton 1 day ago
That was the story of my life when I was teaching. I found that it went over better when I gave one instruction at a time, only moving on to the next when everyone is up to speed.
Little Bit 1 day ago
What I hate is when I'm asked to give an explanation and then when i do I'm accused of being impertinent or defensive. Then there are the times when I say nothing or keep it as brief as possible but then get interrogated until I've given every last detail.
roddy 1 day ago
I swing from saying virtually nothing to finding someone is actually listening to me and spilling way more than I intended to. Then I feel really awkward and uncomfortable afterwards and have to avoid those people. It’s as if they walked in on me undressing. I’m not natural with them any more.
Papa 1 day ago
My wife does that. We can have a minor disagreement about something. She'll start to explain her point of view to me, I'll realize she's right, and say so, but she just keeps going. It's like she had a list of points to cover and she just can't stop halfway through, even though her goal has been accomplished. It's frustrating for me because it feels like she's still arguing for no reason.
Zig Zag Wanderer 23 hours ago
Ha! My partner does this all the time, although not when arguing (we almost never argue). It's when she's making a suggestion. I have to 'agree' about about 20 times! I try to wait until she's finished before agreeing more than once, now.
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OneHappyPuppy 1 day ago
I've started doing this recently - speaking in my third language, I'm never sure if I've said it correctly/explained it well
SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
Oddly enough, this may have helped me in my career. (I used to write instructions on how to use software.)
#19
Having to do two things at once in order to pay full attention to one of those things. Example: playing a game on my phone in order to be able to pay attention to a lecture or meeting.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
I used to doodle in my notebook during lectures for this reason but then my teacher told me to never do it again so I began fully zoning out and now he complains I don’t pay attention
anna.haberl1 2 hours ago
That totally pissed off my german teacher- thought he caught me doing something else on class, asked me something to prove I wasn‘t paying attention, though I have the right answer.
R Dennis 10 hours ago
It used to bug my wife when I would talk on the phone, watch TV, have the radio on, and be reading a book at the same time. She would see chaos, but it was the only time I could relax. I could tell her absolutely everything that was going on with each thing. It really helped when I was a restaurant consultant because I could watch all steps simultaneously.
#20
Instantly recognizing patterns.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I love patterns! I would not say that I'm good at recognizing them though. 😅
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
I have always been able to recognise people's faces, in photos and films, even if they are in disguise or celebs as babies. I assumed everyone could. When I was teaching, we used to have a weekly photo quiz in the common room. The head of 6th form banned me from answering or miming answers to my students.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
From seemingly unrelated things too, I was able to be good enough at physics and chemistry through pattern recognition
#21
Time blindness. I zone out and look at my phone and 2 hours have gone by.
Maya_D 1 day ago
My husband is like this and it drives me crazy! We’re late for everything because he has no concept of time whereas I’m always aware of it.
Corbmi 1 day ago
Same for my wife. I've taken to telling her that we need to be somewhere an hour before we actually do. We still end up being late, but only a little bit. Small victories and all that.
Load More Replies... Zombie Andrew 1 day ago
I call it "Time dysmorphia" because, at least for me, it can speed up and slow down exponentially during any given time frame
E2U&U2 1 day ago
Time blindness, wow, what a concept. All those years ago, when I was young and needed to be places, I would habitually lose track of time despite the honest steps I took to be on time. When I was late, and people would demand to know why, they just looked at me so crazy when I said, "I don't know what happened, I wasn't doing anything, I was getting dressed, I don't know where the time went."
Tinkershark 1 day ago
People have acted like it is silly I will set alarms on my phone all the time, even for recreation and scrolling. I'm just trying not to void out, because time doesn't tick right for me. 10 minites can feel like an hour, an hour can feel like 10 minutes
James Blanken 1 hour ago
This one doesn't affect me much. Are there tons I get really focused on something and a lot of time goes by, yes. But it's time I can spare. Usually when I know i have to be somewhere at a certain time in very cognizant to not stay something that will take up a lot of time. I guess that's the other side of the coin.
#22
Saying exactly what I mean but then being called rude when I was being legitimately neutral.
Lotekguy 1 day ago (edited)
Sometimes your body language or way of speaking conveys something that the words don't. Or the person may be unexpectedly defensive or sensitive about the matter, and poised to feel offended or slighted, no matter how neutral you you think you're being.
Andrew Keir 1 day ago
And you're "hurting their feeeeeelings" and suddenly it's all about you being evil ...
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Khavrinen 1 day ago
My problem is usually with questions. I ask, "Why do you do [ action lots of people do, that makes no sense to me]?", because I'm genuinely trying to understand, and people get all P.O.ed because they're certain I'm mocking them for doing it. It's happened to me multiple times.
Laserleader 1 hour ago
THIS! Every day is a struggle because if i don't make my voice sound pleasant on purpose, then my normal flat tone upsets the people around me. I just want to get information out, I am horrible at placating.
Matt Shervington 3 hours ago
This is my everyday life. I just don't have the time nor patience to pander to people. So I just say what I've got to say. Been called rude many, many times over and it honestly baffles me why.
#23
Eating the same option for 3 weeks...then hating it for years 😭😂
Zig Zag Wanderer 1 day ago
Ha ha! The number of times my cupboard or fridge gets filled with 'that thing I have to have all the time' once I suddenly stop wanting it is crazy!
Rick Murray 1 day ago
Three weeks? I took the same ready meal to work every day for nearly six years. Now the thought of it makes me nauseous. So I'm taking a different one (the same) to work every day....
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I cannot make myself eat something if it's not currently what I'm "obsessed" with and its always sad when I end up having to throw stuff out because my cravings have changed it I've tried to ignore what I want. My brain would rather starve.
Nat Rich 1 day ago
Me and eggs. I love them, have them everyday then one day they're too "eggy" and I can't eat them for months lol
Zig Zag Wanderer 23 hours ago
To be fair, eggs do tend to be overly eggy....
Load More Replies... roddy 1 day ago
I ate marmite sandwiches for lunch for decades. Nobody stole my lunch twice, and I have no vitamin B problems at least. I still love it. But I once went on vacation and wore the same skirt for two weeks and it took years for me to be able to look at it again. Still can’t wear it.
#24
Listening to one song on repeat for hours.
Crystalwitch60 1 day ago
I’ve done this just means u love that song its your happy place , nothing more ,
Rick Murray 1 day ago
This was pretty much my reaction to the entirety of "Legends of the Light" by Eye of Melian. It's basically aural dopamine.
DC 9 hours ago
Yeah! Different bands, different recordings from different tours, demos - some songs have been recorded so often, so different, that this can keep your ears occupied for a whole day or so. Sometimes, it's worth it, like ... Route 66. The Stones, the Pretty Things, the Cramps? They all did this. They all sound vastly different. They all are worthy of your ears!
#25
Pattern recognition, re-reading the same sentence/question 10 times and still not understanding, reading a whole page in a book and not even knowing what i read, food hyperfixations, rumination, hating showering because it’s a “big task” for me, not doing anything before a work shift (even if it’s at 4pm) because i’m afraid i won’t have time, listening to the same song over and over, overstimulation by crowds/loudness, getting overwhelmed/frustrated REALLY easily, over analyzing, i could probably think of more.
Cyndi Merrill 2 hours ago
“How did I get in this bloody nutshell?” Austin Powers
Load More Replies... Papa 1 day ago
The only thing in this post that I recognized was reading a portion of a book and then not knowing what I read. In my case it's because part of my brain was reading, but another part had gotten distracted and was thinking about something else so what I had read hadn't sunk in. I don't know if that makes sense, but it's the best way I know to describe it.
#26
Needing lists of things. If I don’t have my checklist then i’ll probably forget half the things i was supposed to do.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
If I write it down, I'll remember it. Verbal stuff goes in one ear and out the other. Notes on my phone are quickly forgotten. Turns out, writing things down actually helps you remember.
Lady Eowyn 1 day ago
I don't just have lists of things to do, but I keep lists of all sorts. Things I have, thing's I've read, things I want to tell someone, and so much more.
#27
Inability to sleep before any event the next day no matter how unimportant it is
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
The Roman Emperor, Caligula, called this 'hippodrome head' because it felt like horses galloping round and round a race track. Find a way to interrupt your repetitive train of thought. One idea is putting on a familiar old song on YouTube and click the subtitles, then you can sing along. Works for me.
#28
task initiation. 1. i cant do a task just by thinking i want to do it. i have to have an actual external push/drive. like cleaning my house, i mope around all day thinking i will clean i will clean. but tell me you be dropping by in 45 mins, and i can clean it all up. 2. I cant do anything alone, i need a body double to just be there with me even if they aren't doing the same thing im doing. 3. i cant just start and stop a task by my own. i could literally work all day with no breaks if no one tells me to do a bathroom break, or a meal break. so yeah. when I learned about that, I'm like, this is too complicated.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
So similar but it's more that if I stop to take a break, I won't be able to start again and sometimes it's almost impossible to stop even if I want/need to! I do things better alone than with someone but I definitely need external motivation.
Bored Retsuko 1 day ago (edited)
Why is BP randomly disabling replies? Like Maya_D's comment. It's even a premium account.
#29
Perfectionism. It slows me down with every task, job etc.
Tabitha 1 day ago (edited)
Yes! Mostly because my rough drafts are VERY rough. I never could get the hang of making an outline, so tend to just brain dump thoughts onto paper, with lots of new paragraphs begun but not concluded (needing more research and of course, citations), and not always in order (hell, that’s how this comment was written). Also, I think so much faster than I write, so my handwriting is a scrawl and most of the time illegible to anyone but me—-though sometimes it’s a struggle for me too. This was especially true back in the day when all assignments were handwritten (I sure am showing my age). I would have to neaten up my “rough” draft just so the instructor could make head or tails of it, so it wasn’t truly rough anymore. Believe me when I say I love using technology. I am now able to type my rough drafts out so they’re at least readable (I do have to take care to check the weird associations spellcheck makes—-it is my nemesis), and cut, paste, and easily erase and type over corrections.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
I used to hate it when a teacher/professor insisted on us turning in a rough draft. I can't just leave things wrong! I'd end up writing the entire paper, then reverse engineering the rough draft.
Suby 3 hours ago
Instead of rewriting the draft, I would start the entire paper over. If it wasn't good enough as it was, it wasn't good at all.
Load More Replies... #30
Hating ice breakers. For some reason people genuinely like those.
Nat Rich 1 day ago
Do people like them though or do they just say they do because they want to say the right thing? I cannot imagine a world where people genuinely like those lol
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago (edited)
Agreed! Although I was at one meeting last year where I said something similar and I got a few confused non-committal responses from my "group", so it could be true! I was convinced up until that moment that ice breakers are universally despised.
Load More Replies... Randomosity 1 day ago
Why do I have to ask how your day is? You're just going to say good and expect me to say the same when you ask me, even though we could both care less about a random person's problems.
Sally Moen 1 day ago
The dreaded interview question "Tell me about yourself" used to throw me until I saw a YouTube video explaining that you can practice a short bit, and you don't need to actually tell them everything
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
When asked to do this, I always feel like telling them that I am an amateur sword-swallower and I am married to a tree. I usually chicken out and talk about my experience as a teacher.
Load More Replies... #31
Predicting the end of movies, shows, conventions. Being human lie detector and not being able to put into words why I don’t like someone immediately.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
I’ve been able to understand people’s personalities without having to interact with them so I rarely have proof when I dislike someone even though I’m usually right
Sue User 1 day ago
Seeing how something is going to go a certain way and trying to sound the alarm but people don't listen.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
My partner does this every time we watch something together.
#32
Reading for 30 minutes and having no clue what I just read.
#33
Countdown clock for everything. Apparently "getting ready to get ready to go" is not a normal thing.
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
When we are going out together, eg: a wedding or meal out with a reservation time, my older brother always nags us to get ready more quickly and gives us a countdown to the ideal departure time. It used to annoy me until I realised it was because my father used to make us really late for everything when we kids.
Dirk Daring 1 day ago
I thought the image was reversed, but now I know that's just a stupid logo.
#34
Over analyzing every interaction I have with another person. Rejection sensitivity. Extreme reactions to any type of music that tickles my brain and gives me a dopamine release.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago (edited)
All of that is so painful! Even the music. I do get dopamine but I also am easily negatively influenced. 😞
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
Why are you waiting to see if someone accepts or rejects you? It doesn't matter what they think. You decide of they are interesting, kind or humorous. Your opinions are as valid as theirs.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
If someone reasonably criticises me I feel like a colossal failure because growing up I’d be shamed and beaten for showing basic human behaviour
#35
Having to train myself to make eye contact with people in conversation.
Rick Murray 1 day ago
Which eye? Should I alternate? Stare between them? People demand eye contact then start to get creeped out when you put in the effort to do it - why?
Nat Rich 1 day ago
Yeh then being too busy counting the amount of time you've held the eye contact to actually take in what they're saying lol
My O My 1 day ago
The opposite. Having to train myself to make normal eye contact. Just staring into the other peoples eyes while talking isn't appreciated
highwaycrossingfrog 1 day ago
I didn't realise until I was in my thirties, possibly forties, that you were supposed to look people in the eye when you talk to them. I always looked at people's mouths, because that's where the sound comes from. Now I have to remember to do it (I usually go right eye).
James Blanken 1 hour ago
If I'm having conversation I have no issue with eye contact. But if I'm just walking by I feel awkward as all hell!
Violetta Cogoni 3 hours ago
I learnt to look at their right eye, near the nose. Then I met someone who can’t see from their right eye and now I do not know how to behave. Is it weird if I look at their blind eye? I am not trained to naturally look at the other one!
Andrew Keir 1 day ago
I still can't do this after more than 50 years, it seems so d**n *rude* !
#36
Being able to know instantly when a new person is a not safe person.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
When you’ve been hurt and used by many people throughout your life, you’ll be able to figure out who’s more likely to do the same to you again
Tabitha 1 day ago (edited)
And no one is more hurt and used than someone who’s neurodivergent, since many emotionally immature neurotypical people (and there are a lot of them out there who have achieved biological adulthood but not emotional adulthood) can be especially cruel and go out of their way to hurt and use any neurodivergent people unlucky enough to cross their paths, for no other reason than to make fun of someone who’s different. Because apparently the only way many of them can feel better about themselves is to make someone else feel worse, and neurodivergent people are the easiest targets. If we’ve suffered from that kind of treatment before, believe me, we remember it and all the signs and signals that came with it, because we dissected it, analyzed it, and ruminated on, and beat ourselves up for, our part in falling for it. We can see it screaming down the pike from miles away.
Load More Replies... Dee Hampton 1 day ago
Having had an eating disorder and a substance dependency, I can spot another sufferer from 40 paces. I met my husband on a blind date and said to him "You had a violent father" and he replied "So did you"
#37
All or nothing mentality.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
Or the opposite. I see all possible sides to a situation, all the shades of grey….and get stuck in analysis paralysis.
Tabitha 1 day ago
This! For the majority of possible arguments, I can see where all sides are coming from. To me, the worked isn’t only black and white. Hell, it’s not even various shades of gray. I see ALL the possible colors of all the possible sides to just about any issue. It has to be a really clear, cut and dried, utterly taboo/reprehensible/totally gross kind of topic for me to see nothing but black and white (example: Was Hitler a horrible monster who deserved to die? Yes! Of course he was, absolutely 100%, hands down, completely back and white, NO gray—-or any other color—-areas at all.)
Load More Replies... Dee Hampton 1 day ago
Why do you have to be perfect every time? It would be OK if you got 80% this week, 60% next week. You can always redraft.
#38
The constant second guessing of everything I do or feel, making things harder than they are, being able to feel what others are thinking and assuming they hate you, completely underestimating how long it takes to do things.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I feel so seen with this one. I think more than any of the others. 😭
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
I can be either 15 minutes early or 15 minutes late, but not on time. I choose to be 15 minutes early. It's MUCH less stressful.
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
If they do hate you, that's down to them. You carry on being your kind, supportive self and let the haters look in the mirror.
#39
I hate being in the kitchen doing anything if someone else is there😭
Toujin C'Thlu 1 day ago (edited)
I feel like I can't do anything productive if someone else is in the room with me
Tabitha 1 day ago (edited)
Comes from neurotypicals thinking neurodivergents are stupid for some reason, and need to be micromanaged. We’re not stupid—-in fact most of us are WAY more intelligent than they can ever dream of being—-we just might have our own ways of doing some things that can obviously be done several different ways that all work, and that may differ from the one and only way the neurotypical knows. So the neurotypical’s brain jumps ti the only conclusion they have, which is that the different person is wrong, stupid, going to mess up the whole thing, even though of they’d just leave us TF alone and not micromanage us, it would all come out just fine—-and sometimes way better—-in the end. But the micromanaging and badgering to do things THEIR way or the highway (especially if they also happen to be your boss and threaten your job) can leave a psychic mark on us, and make us just want to be left alone to get the job done. Someone else being in a place like a kitchen—-or our desk at work or anywhere—-makes us immediately nervous about all that c**p happening again, when all we want to do is cook (or do our jobs, or whatever).
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I just hate being in the kitchen lol but extra if someone is there.
Little Bit 1 day ago
I can only do household chores when I am by myself. If anybody else is there I just can't get started. Hence why i am up at 5am everg Saturday doing my housework before anybody else gets up. When I can't sleep, I sometimes do the housework at 3am.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
I hate trying to do anything when another person is there, if they’re hovering around and expecting my attention. I hate having lots of distractions, or trying to do too many things at once.
roddy 1 day ago
I am so easily distracted that a person “helping” me in the kitchen will throw me right off. I might pretend I know what I’m doing without a recipe and will leave out something important or forget to do the sides. Maybe some people can have a chat and work away in the kitchen simultaneously , but I can’t focus on someone else and the meal at the same time.
#40
Never being able to remember people's names, forgetting words in the middle of speaking, losing track of what I was trying to write because I couldn't write fast enough and my brain won't slow down, forgeting appointment is, forgetting homework. Basically everything that has to do with working memory. I am very lucky to live in a time when supports are readily available and culturally acceptable.
roddy 1 day ago
It bothers me that when I am cleaning up I find lists of things I meant to do and almost all of them are on my current lists, and I didn’t realize how many years they had been there, never getting done. I don’t remember making the lists except when I am actually doing them, so it’s interesting to compare them, sometimes decades old.
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
It sounds like you have a heavy cognitive load. There is something else on your mind that is displacing the everyday things.
#41
When people are talking interrupting to ask questions. I thought I was actively listening… turns out you have to let people finish their sentences?
Zig Zag Wanderer 1 day ago
I have a friend (neurodivergent but doesn't realise it) who constantly does this. Unfortunately, his mind works so fast that he can't be patient enough to listen to it all. It outright becomes impossible to tell him a story because of it, unfortunately.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
Also, when someone interrupts you, you completely forget what you were saying.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
I cope with this by being quiet….but if they talk too long, I zone out. If they then ask me a question, I’m busted for not paying attention.
James Blanken 1 hour ago
I have an issue with the opposite. If you ask me a question, then interrupt me when I'm answering/explaining, it drives me wild. I've gotten nasty looks when I start up again with "well, if you hadn't interrupted me and let me finish..." A lot of the time I would've answered their second question if I was able to finish my main answer.
Natalie Kelsey 9 hours ago
It took me years to stop finishing people's sentences because I assumed I knew what they were going to say after they paused. I was almost always right, until I met my husband. He didn't mind at first but got increasingly frustrated with me and helped me break the habit. I never finished his sentence correctly and he paused a lot, lol. Now we've been together for 25 years and he's a much more confident speaker and I'm a much more patient listener.
#42
Justice sensitivity to the extent of self detriment.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
It genuinely distressed me and made me miss out on so many opportunities and memories because I had such a strong sense of justice even when it wasn’t ever necessary
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
Did you live through a time when powerful people were unjust? Are you trying to make sure it never happens again?
Load More Replies... SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
People like me are feeling pretty stressed out all the time during the 2020s, especially in the U.S.
#43
Having to listen to something to stimulate my brain so i can go to sleep, otherwise ill just be up thinking about any and everything.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
Every night, without fail. I like the option to make the sound oscillate, as it reminds me of ocean waves, which is soothing.
Load More Replies... Lady Eowyn 1 day ago
I have to have the tv on or I can't get to sleep. I don't even look at it, but it has to be on.
#44
CONSTANTLY misplacing/losing things and then consequentially having a full blown meltdown over not finding it as a full grown adult.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I've gotten better on the second half of that but it also depends on my level of being overwhelmed at the time.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
...especially when you've put it in a special place and believe you can't possibly forget where it is.
#45
Behavioral pattern recognition and intuitively knowing what decisions people will make before they act. Also, having entire conversations in your head about hypothetical situations that could occur before you attend an event or have the actual conversation.
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
This happens when you are highly critical of yourself. Be spontaneous. It is up to them how they receive your words.
#46
Maladaptive daydreaming, specially how it affected my memory.
Maya_D 1 day ago
Kept me from fully living my life for years. So much of my time was spent inside my head. While I still have a good imagination, I can live in the real world most of the time these days, now I’m properly medicated.
OneHappyPuppy 1 day ago
Wait, this is a thing? And there's medication for it?? I used to flex online how I have three whole books written in my head, but nowadays I've realized it's not really normal...
Load More Replies... TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
My problem is reading. I sometimes can't differentiate real and read memories.
LillieMean 1 day ago
For me, this was a coping mechanism for trauma. When I healed enough from it, it has decreased significantly and I channeled the remaining daydreaming into writing as a creative person. I would completely zone out at school and the teacher sent me to the school psychologist. I am very grateful for that.
#47
I don't like lights. I want the house dark no lights. My bedroom is very dark. That's where I want to be
zububonsai 1 day ago (edited)
I hate too bright light in the early mornings (I call my ceiling lamp in the kitchen "interrogation lamp" ). I start with little lights scattered in different corners instead and a 5 candles holder on the kitchen table. (the "hygge" concept of lighting rooms). When I'm "awake" enough I can switch on "the big light".
LillieMean 1 day ago
When I moved in with my husband, he had a floor lamp whose shade made the light a horrible, ugly, dingy color. It came with several shades and they were all horrible. He agreed to sell it and I wrote in the sales text that the lamp comes with different shades of replacement shades that create different mood lighting in your home such as a morgue, a dungeon, a brothél and a prison. I just wondered why someone bought it and whose dungeon it is now lighting.
Kelly Scott 1 day ago
I want my night sky to be dark, everywhere, all the time. I hate the people who have to have outside lights on 24/7, especially the bright LED lights that light up the whole f*****g countryside now.
#48
I can't listen when I'm making eye contact.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
OMG this! Either you want me to LOOK like I'm paying attention or you want me to ACTUALLY listen but not look like I am but you definitely can't have both! Also, don't expect me to speak coherently if you want eye contact while I'm talking; I barely make sense without it. 😵
Corbmi 1 day ago
We should form a club of some sort: NEC (No Eye Contact).
Load More Replies... #49
Chatter in my mind, always thinking always ruminating making up scenarios, making up entire new worlds, navigation skills, time anxiety and being soooo prompt, taking things literally, pattern recognition to point I can tell the future based on it 😅 ocd but messy too.
Viktoriya K 49 minutes ago
sounds like me. I've read that when it's a game of opposites like that you could be autistic ADHD.
#51
High emotions for everything and having a hard time getting over things… I’d mad for days if you let me.
Nat Rich 1 day ago
Oh I'm the opposite about getting over things and it annoys me. If I'm wronged I forget why and I struggle to hold a grudge. Which might sound good but some people deserve a grudge to be held.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
Those people who deserve to be a grudge? I just write them out of my story permanently, as if they never existed.
Load More Replies... Stardust she/her 1 day ago
Still upset at that kid who said he wouldn’t invite me to his party back in kindergarten
#52
Coffee. I thought people were lying about their need for coffee in the morning because caffeine does nothing for me.
RM 1 day ago (edited)
Some people just don't react to caffeine - I could drink the strongest coffee, one after the other, then go to bed and sleep fine. One of my colleagues at work is the same. Most people I know, however, claims the caffeine energises them or wakes them up. I drink it because I like the taste.
highwaycrossingfrog 1 day ago
I don't understand why people are so obsessed with coffee, I hate it. But then I also think pizza is overrated so...
Papa 1 day ago
You are not alone. My sister says she hates coffee but loves the smell. I dislike both. Also, I can eat pizza and enjoy it, but it's definitely not on my list of favorite foods.
Load More Replies... Colleen Glim 1 day ago (edited)
Sometimes it’s more about the routine than it is about the caffeine. But don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee
James Blanken 1 hour ago
I've never had a taste for coffee. Energy drinks and shots don't wire me. It's almost a placebo effect i feel.
Matt Shervington 3 hours ago
Many people have found out how truly unpleasant i really am without coffee. Even my kids know, do not start your c**p before I've had at least 1 cup in me
#53
Extreme sensory issues. Have to be wearing socks 24/7. The air itself is a sensory issue.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I have extreme sensory issues for all of my senses. I'm the opposite about socks though! I hate them! I wear flip flops as much as possible outside and no socks/slippers inside.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
To quote the Grinch: “All the noise, noise, *noise*, NOISE!”
Randomosity 1 day ago
I love socks, but I have a heightened sense of touch. I have to wear pants to bed even though I'm hot natured because I can feel the hair on my legs rub against each other if I wear a gown. And I immediately know if a stray hair falls on my arm or if I get something under my nails.
Matt Shervington 3 hours ago
Yo, thats on god!! If I could realistically wear my socks in the shower I would. And I truly despise when someone try to touch my feet, like I will seriously k**l you!!
#54
Feeling like I’m watching myself live in 3rd person.
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
That is actually an effective technique if you have intrusive thoughts. "I am having intrusive thoughts about the disagreement with my colleague today."
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
My dreams are like that. Instead of living the dream, I watch myself in the dream. It's weird.
#55
I did not realize people genuinely do not see an issue with things being moved/touched. I tell my coworkers constantly "if you use my stuff, put it back EXACTLY where you found it" but they just toss it on my cart instead. it makes me irrationally upset. It's MY STUFF, why are you touching it.
highwaycrossingfrog 1 day ago
I fired my cleaner because she did not put things back where they were supposed to go and it annoyed me so much
#56
Having to read someone's lips to understand what they are saying.😭😭😭
Nat Rich 1 day ago
Yes! This is why I hate telephone calls with a passion but I'm absolutely fine with a zoom call
highwaycrossingfrog 1 day ago
I too hate telephone calls but am fine with Zoom, but it's not an auditory issue. I think I must just really need body language and facial expressions to be able to confidently hold a conversation.
Load More Replies... TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I didn't know this about myself until COVID! I really struggle to understand people when I can't see their mouth moving. I thought it was because I'm not an auditory learner.
#57
Intellectualizing emotions instead of processing them.
Gail Lott 1 day ago
My therapist would always have to stop me and say, “I didn’t ask you what you THINK about it, I asked you how you FEEL about it.” I would be stumped.
Sue User 1 day ago
This reminded me of the time I had to write an art paper in college. Just two pages: light composition, coloring,etc. Had a friend read it. " But you never said how you feel about it". I looked at the assignment and said " It doesn't ask for that".
Load More Replies... TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I don't even know what that means or what they are trying to say here. I have very little emotional regulation, so there is definitely an extreme lacking of intelligence applied to them. 😂
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
The fact that you realise you have "little emotional regulation" is a good starting point
Load More Replies... #58
Not wanting to brush my teeth!
Sue User 1 day ago
I cannot STAND mint toothpaste. Ugh. I was good for a while when they were adding charcoal to everything. Someone bought me strawberry, but it was way to sweet. And the foam, ugh! Found cinnamon mouthwash the other day and loving brushing now.
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
I have got into turmeric toothpaste. Reduces inflammation and speeds up healing.
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Sally Moen 1 day ago
Add different ways to brush, including cheap electric toothbrushes, baby toothbrush (they are very tiny and soft), foam mouth swabs (used in hospitals and nursing homes for folks that cannot eat but still need their mouths cleaned), finger toothbrushes (similar to a rubber fingertip but with bristles on one side). Even a denture brush, but use lightly. Point is to have a variety of choices and like the other commentor here said, several flavors of toothpaste including non-sweetened (most regular toothpaste is sweetened with saccharin) and fruit flavored. I like to keep a box of baking soda open to use to brush my teeth for times when I cannot stand toothpaste for some reason.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago (edited)
It's not about flavors for me, I rarely use toothpaste anyway. I can't keep a habit. I become adverse to the action until it becomes a compulsion, then it happens until the next compulsion period or sometimes fear works too
Load More Replies... #59
Captioned speech. I thought everybody spelled spoken words in their head???
Sally Moen 1 day ago
Closed captions used to be rare before the 1990s in the US, now it's so very common, and I'm very grateful.
Kelly Scott 1 day ago
But some of the captions are atrocious. I've never seen so many misspelled words, words that are dropped, or whole phrases that are left out in captions. I really feel sorry for the people who depend on captions to follow the story line. I don't know how they even do it sometimes. I don't know why on earth they can't caption the entire show or movie ahead of time and then add it when the show or movie airs instead of relying on people or AI who are trying to type and spell correctly, which they never do.
Load More Replies... #60
Being able to automatically identify other neurodivergent people.
OneHappyPuppy 1 day ago
I'm certain my boss is on the spectrum, just can't pinpoint which end...
Natalie Kelsey 9 hours ago
Not automatically but I can definitely tell sometimes. It's great for identifying people who understand, sometimes. Other times it's super frustrating because the person is obviously dealing with internalized ableism and is in denial about what's going on with them and they get upset about your issues when they're doing the same stuff
#61
I can’t stand still, I have to rock side to side.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I'm constantly moving. It's so perplexing to be both extremely exhausted and feel like I can't stop moving or I'll explode.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
My teacher and parents like to physically restrain me from moving back and forth or tapping my leg because they think it’s the sign of a disturbed person but what they can’t comprehend is that them restraining me disturbs me far more than me moving like that
#62
Immediate and severe 2nd hand embarrassment even though it has nothing to do with me. Intense and complete full conversations in my head before speaking. Pacing while on the phone. Needing to do everything in order ie there are 3 houses- have to go to house 1, first house 2, second etc., watching the same movie, shows, or books that I know every word to on repeat., unable to wear mismatch socks without anxiety, cutting every nail and filing them because one nail broke.
Nat Rich 1 day ago
I feel like keeping socks in pairs is a skill I haven't mastered. I wear odd socks because life is too short
highwaycrossingfrog 1 day ago
I find the easiest way to match your socks is to do it whilst hanging up the washing. So I'll hang one sock and leave a space next to it until I pull the other one out of the basket. I couldn't wear odd socks every day.
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#63
Not ever having an agenda book or planner work for me longer than maybe three days😂
#65
Ruminating to the point it keeps me up at night and I make myself physically sick, avoiding eating certain foods altogether bc I don't like the texture, safe foods or "fixation meals", non-linear grief, lack of maintaining a self care schedule and lacking time management... I could keep going but yeah.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
Some foods are unacceptable in one form, but awesome in a different form. I'll eat large curd cottage cheese, but small curd makes me gag. I dislike the texture of a sliced tomato, but love bruschetta, tomato juice, marinara, etc.
Lady Eowyn 1 day ago
I've always had a thing about food textures, it was explained when I got diagnosed with autism at 69. I don't like to eat around people because of the comments I've gotten over the years.
#66
Remembering EVERY. THING. I was well into my thirties before I realized that most people do not remember every single detail of most situations. 😅
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
I’ve got working memory from when I was 4-6 months old and can remember nearly everything that’s ever happened to me and what was said to me by everyone. I remember everyone’s faces, their personalities etc and what I was thinking during each of these moments. I can remember before I could think. It’s exhausting
Randomosity 1 day ago
I wish I had that problem. I literally forget something after it's told to me.
Corbmi 1 day ago
And God forbid someone is giving me verbal instructions. Just a waste of their breath due to my attention span, or lack there of.
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#67
Always counting 😭😭😭why am I counting how many times I typed A😭😭5 btw
Rick Murray 1 day ago
Yes. Half the time I forget what I'm counting so have to start again. Music is good for this, especially prog rock - one two three four five six seven one two three four five six seven...
Kelly Scott 1 day ago (edited)
Weird question, but if you're familiar with the songs "Tuesday Afternoon" or "Uncle John's Band", you know they have that section where they make 8 repeats of a bar (in "Uncle John's Band", I think it's 7) before they break into something else. Have you ever come into the middle of those repeats and known instantly which beat they're on, whether it's 3 or 6 or something? In other words, you don't have to count 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 to know when the break comes - you just know when it is?
Load More Replies... Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
I've always counted stairs, either going up or down. In every house I've lived in, there were always 13 stairs. (This helps when you're carrying a big basket of laundry and can't see your feet.)
#68
Randomly thinking “touch that object or something really bad will happen.”
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
Haha! This was me as a kid all the time! It's rare now, but I'm still really superstitious about jinxes.
#69
I thought everyone was aware of how loud they were crunching when eating crunchy things.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
Some girl in my class yesterday ate chips in such a bad way. She was sitting at the back and I was sitting at the very first bench but I could hear everything; the way her lips smacked, the way she sucked and crunched the chips etc. How are people not self aware?
Melissa Green 20 hours ago
Misophonia(sp)... I can't stand it when people chew with their mouth open or smacking their lips while they eat. It makes me irrationally angry to the point I have to leave the room.
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
I couldn't stay in the room when my father ate a pear. If I were a judge, I would consider noisy eating as an acceptable reason to commit m*rder.
#70
Being able to hear electricity.
Sue User 1 day ago
No, you can hear it in the big towers. Sometimes in the house. Definitely hear the motors on things, and no they are not dying. I have a service call to prove it.
Load More Replies...
#71
Listening to a song 5000 times until you find a new fixation. Repetitive actions (I twirl my hair into a pattern repeatedly) without even thinking about it.
General Anaesthesia 1 day ago
Spotify tends to make a song inaccessible if you listen to it too often in a short time. They have no sympathy for your need to hear it.
#72
Avoiding showering because I don’t like the feeling of wet hair. But I love being clean.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
I hate hate hate wet hair so much! It’s uncomfortable and I can’t do anything on days when I have wet hair. Doing anything in wet hair feels painful at times and washing my hair ruins the entire day. I have to prep myself for one hour on hairwashing days
Sally Moen 1 day ago
I imagine the future of cleanliness will appeal to you then, with sonic showers already a reality.
#73
Organizing my shirts in the color of the rainbow with matching hangers.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
I find a shirt I like, then buy four of them: black, grey, white, olive green. Sometimes, I daringly branch out into burgundy or navy, but I typically regret it.
OneHappyPuppy 1 day ago
On a similar note, my dad used to hang clothes up with pegs that had to be rainbow colored, and in order. So on a clothesline, the far left would be all red pegs, then orange, then... You get the picture. I graduated from his mania by only making sure one item has pegs of the same color holding it up
#74
Being gifted. I could read early, learn multiple languages from library books, do advanced college classes in middle school, and I was a speed reader.
Sally Moen 1 day ago
Turns out speed reading isn't a job skill needed these days. Nor is being able to read upside down text
NancyandCharlie Miller 2 hours ago
I can read and write upside down and backwards! Completely useless "skills" to have!
Load More Replies... SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
The trouble is, if you learn to read fluently at a very young age, all the adults think you’re a genius. Then later on, when it turns out that word and language things are the ONLY thing you’re good at….they lose their minds when you sück at math. I just figure I’m an idiot savant.
#75
I am a synesthete – I feel different sounds in my body (pressure/vibration/pulling/...), which I only became aware of when I put on noise-cancelling headphones for the first time and all these bodily sensations suddenly stopped. The sensory overload caused by AuDHS therefore has a double impact.
Kelly Scott 1 day ago
I have number lines of regular numbers, months of the year, days of the week, years in a century, and a whole line of centuries so when I hear about something happening in say, 1247, I can see the century and pull the year from it like pulling a piece of paper from a file folder. It's pretty handy. I think most people do this, though.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
Huh, interesting. I didn’t know that this was a type of synaesthesia. I’ve got synaesthesia which allows me to associate colours and personalities to things like numbers, letters, music etc. Hell, I can even associate movements with sound so I don’t need audio when watching videos if I have subtitles, I can just piece together all the sounds in my brain without putting any actual mental effort. I used to have another synaesthesia as a kid where if a movie character felt pain then I’d also feel it. I couldn’t watch action movies growing up as I’d feel pain where a character got shot
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
All through school, English was the yellow folder, Math was blue, Science was green, History was red, etc. My daughter, unprompted by me, did it the exact same way. We both describe flavors as colors too.
Load More Replies... #76
Trying to understand why some people did what they did almost obsessively is so bad learnt to only care about WHAT HAPPENED not WHY it happened.
TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago
I make my husband angry regularly by trying to understand why he did or didn't do something. He makes me angry regularly by not being interested in understanding why I did or didn't do something.
Dee Hampton 1 day ago
Have you read 'Men are from Mars, women are from Venus'?
Load More Replies... #77
Loading the dishwasher in a very certain way.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 1 day ago
I’m sure this isn’t just a ND thing, my husband never loaded the dishwasher correctly. Even getting him to put things in it rather than on top of it was a win though, even if I did have to rearrange it. Let’s not talk about hanging out washing….
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
I think my dad must be ND as he yells at us when the dishwasher isn’t loaded according to how he likes it
#79
Limerence 😭
Natalie Kelsey 9 hours ago
I used to get this all the time in school. I was really worried it would persist after my wedding because it was so easy for me to "fall in love" but luckily my husband turned out to be the one for me. 25 years together and I haven't been bothered by falling for someone else involuntarily, like when I was younger
Daisydaisy 1 day ago
OMG yes! This is a real thing and has been by far the closest I've ever come to total insanity, several times in my life. Terrifying
James Blanken 1 hour ago
Wow! Just looked this up and I definitely had it when I was younger. Pretty sure I still have a touch now.
#80
Needing a plan for every single plan so i know what and when i can do my routine for getting ready and if there’s no plan im extremely confused and don’t know what to do.
#82
Derealization/depersonalization. Literally thought everyone had those, until I randomly started to ask around and everyone started to look at me like "???" when I described it.
#83
Getting irrationally upset and not being able to comprehend when someone doesn’t like the same things as me.
Stardust she/her 1 day ago
As a kid (and even now) my special interest has been astronomy and I struggled with the concept that not everyone liked astronomy. Some kids would tell me to shut up and I could never understand how they would only talk about cartoons and not about space.
Kelly Scott 1 day ago
I finally had to join an astronomy club to find like-minded people.
Load More Replies... SchadenFreudian Psychology 1 day ago
I used to do this, but less and less as I’ve gotten older.
#84
My pedantic speech, everyone says I’m “well spoken” no, I have a large vocabulary and speak like this mainly because it brings me comfort knowing nothing I said is left for interpretation. Any misunderstanding is entirely the other person’s fault.
Kelly Scott 1 day ago
I like to make my writing and the conversations I have "sing" with a certain rhythm and to accomplish that, I tend to use big words. But sometimes I realize I have to tone them down so people won't think I'm a word hound or trying to act smart or something like that.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
Choosing, from a catalog of synonyms, the word that best conveys the nuance you mean.
TheOGpandaHavana 5 hours ago
But intended nuance and interpreted nuance could still be different especially with non native speakers.
Load More Replies... #86
Moving from room to room and cleaning it my mind was blown when I found out people don’t actually clean this way. I thought it was a flex now I’m cleaning paralyzed.
Zig Zag Wanderer 1 day ago
Unfortunately, my cleaning paralysis has been ongoing for 60 years or more....
Corbmi 1 day ago
Ah yes, the final boss room. I get around this by closing the door which magically makes the issue go away.
Load More Replies... TheOGpandaHavana 1 day ago (edited)
I clean like those images of spider webs woven by spiders given caffeine and other stimulants. 😂
What do you think ?
David Paterson 1 day ago (edited)
Few if any of these are remotely "neurodivergent". I have almost all of them. Now excuse me while I publish a lecture on infinite numbers.
[>.<]/ 1 day ago
OK thanks. I was genuinely worried I might be neurodivergent, because I have/ do all of these things.
Load More Replies... Lotekguy 1 day ago
A lot of these seem to be people worrying about abnormalities that aren't really there. Everybody's got a lot more going on inside their head than what they express, or that others can perceive.
Trillian 1 day ago
And just because you have something as a neurodivergent person doesn't necessarily mean it is a symptom or sign of neurodivergence.
Load More Replies... Maya_D 1 day ago
Quite a lot of these fit me but I don’t consider myself neurodivergent. I have depression and anxiety but I don’t think those count. I think there’s just overlap between mental health, normal personality variation and neurodivergence.
roddy 1 day ago
Neurodivergence is a spectrum. You can be a part of the spectrum and relate to it, without being unusually divergent. Most of us can fake normal quite well at least for brief periods :) I think it’s nice to have company.
Load More Replies... DH 1 day ago
Lists like this are a bit dangerous I think, because people read this and when some things here fit their personality they go "I'm neurodivergent". You are not unless you went to a doctor for a diagnosis. Lots of these are just personality traits. Normal deviations from the norm. Don't fret about it and if it is a debilitating problem, seek help.
Zig Zag Wanderer 1 day ago
My biggest problem was discovering that most people don't think like me. They don't need to understand how things work. They're constantly amazed when I explain the things I have obsessed over, and worked out and they never noticed. It took me years to find this out, and by then ALL my friends are neurodivergent, because they can understand these obsessions!
Lady Eowyn 1 day ago
Most of these have nothing to do with being neurodivergent, they're just average human traits. So, people, if you haven't been diagnosed as neurodivergent, don't let any of these make you think you are. If it bothers you enough, talk to a doctor.
roddy 1 day ago
Oh, I hope people aren’t getting stressed thinking “am I neurodivergent”? Who you are is who you are and every person is unique. And if you have some traits you share with neurodivergent people, that’s cool, like having an extra language. Not something to be concerned about, more something to cherish.
Load More Replies...
Multa Nocte 1 day ago (edited)
Arrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!!! Junk article full of misconceptions, says this clinical psychologist. Everyone wants to have a label or try to explain things that are mysterious or irritating about themselves, but almost every one of the things listed here happens in the great majority of people to some extent or another. Don't use a misguided list like this to compare yourself against, especially since this is a compilation of people who may not even have been diagnosed talking about things that THEY think are uncommon. Most of what I have read here occurs to an extent in almost everybody. If you seriously think you are neurodivergent and you have some sort of need for a label, please find a qualified clinician who has experience with neurodivergent people. Sorry for the rant.
Auntriarch 1 day ago (edited)
I was hoping to learn something to help understand my nephew. Unfortunately I ticked all but 11 of the comments myself, so I'm forced to the conclusion that this post is rubbish.
Load More Replies...
Melissa Green 19 hours ago (edited)
I, like a lot of you commenting, can relate to a good amount of these. That said, I don't know if it means I am neurodivergent, or not. There is another one I have: talking on the phone with someone other than a friend or family member. I have to mentally prepare myself for a phone call.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
Is it normal to enjoy when another neurodivergent person is relating their pet subject in detail? I love it when someone shares the thing they're passionate about. I nerd out just as much as they do.
David Paterson 1 day ago (edited)
Few if any of these are remotely "neurodivergent". I have almost all of them. Now excuse me while I publish a lecture on infinite numbers.
[>.<]/ 1 day ago
OK thanks. I was genuinely worried I might be neurodivergent, because I have/ do all of these things.
Load More Replies... Lotekguy 1 day ago
A lot of these seem to be people worrying about abnormalities that aren't really there. Everybody's got a lot more going on inside their head than what they express, or that others can perceive.
Trillian 1 day ago
And just because you have something as a neurodivergent person doesn't necessarily mean it is a symptom or sign of neurodivergence.
Load More Replies... Maya_D 1 day ago
Quite a lot of these fit me but I don’t consider myself neurodivergent. I have depression and anxiety but I don’t think those count. I think there’s just overlap between mental health, normal personality variation and neurodivergence.
roddy 1 day ago
Neurodivergence is a spectrum. You can be a part of the spectrum and relate to it, without being unusually divergent. Most of us can fake normal quite well at least for brief periods :) I think it’s nice to have company.
Load More Replies... DH 1 day ago
Lists like this are a bit dangerous I think, because people read this and when some things here fit their personality they go "I'm neurodivergent". You are not unless you went to a doctor for a diagnosis. Lots of these are just personality traits. Normal deviations from the norm. Don't fret about it and if it is a debilitating problem, seek help.
Zig Zag Wanderer 1 day ago
My biggest problem was discovering that most people don't think like me. They don't need to understand how things work. They're constantly amazed when I explain the things I have obsessed over, and worked out and they never noticed. It took me years to find this out, and by then ALL my friends are neurodivergent, because they can understand these obsessions!
Lady Eowyn 1 day ago
Most of these have nothing to do with being neurodivergent, they're just average human traits. So, people, if you haven't been diagnosed as neurodivergent, don't let any of these make you think you are. If it bothers you enough, talk to a doctor.
roddy 1 day ago
Oh, I hope people aren’t getting stressed thinking “am I neurodivergent”? Who you are is who you are and every person is unique. And if you have some traits you share with neurodivergent people, that’s cool, like having an extra language. Not something to be concerned about, more something to cherish.
Load More Replies... Multa Nocte 1 day ago (edited)
Arrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!!! Junk article full of misconceptions, says this clinical psychologist. Everyone wants to have a label or try to explain things that are mysterious or irritating about themselves, but almost every one of the things listed here happens in the great majority of people to some extent or another. Don't use a misguided list like this to compare yourself against, especially since this is a compilation of people who may not even have been diagnosed talking about things that THEY think are uncommon. Most of what I have read here occurs to an extent in almost everybody. If you seriously think you are neurodivergent and you have some sort of need for a label, please find a qualified clinician who has experience with neurodivergent people. Sorry for the rant.
Auntriarch 1 day ago (edited)
I was hoping to learn something to help understand my nephew. Unfortunately I ticked all but 11 of the comments myself, so I'm forced to the conclusion that this post is rubbish.
Load More Replies... Melissa Green 19 hours ago (edited)
I, like a lot of you commenting, can relate to a good amount of these. That said, I don't know if it means I am neurodivergent, or not. There is another one I have: talking on the phone with someone other than a friend or family member. I have to mentally prepare myself for a phone call.
Nikki Sevven 1 day ago
Is it normal to enjoy when another neurodivergent person is relating their pet subject in detail? I love it when someone shares the thing they're passionate about. I nerd out just as much as they do.
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