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If you’re an adventurous person, you might have said something along the lines of, “I’ll try anything once!” And that’s a good mantra to have when it comes to sampling new foods while traveling the world or trying to find a fitness class that you enjoy. But even if you like taking risks, it’s important that you don’t throw safety completely out the window.
Redditors have recently been sharing stories of people who “messed around and found out” when it came to dangerous things, so we’ve gathered their wildest tales below. From slipping on banana peels to refusing to wear PPE, enjoy reading through these stories that will hopefully remind you not to play with fire!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
This thread reminds me of a funny story of my brother's.
So when we were kids, our step father was really strict and to be honest, a bit of a jerk. He had my brother digging post holes all day when he was about 10 or 12, and my brother's hands began to blister and bleed. My brother asked my stepfather for a pair of gloves to protect his hands and my step-dad derided and ridiculed him. "Oh what? You want a pair of b***h mittens?"
Fast forward several years and my brother is a grown man and a foreman for a construction crew. As a favor to my stepfather, my brother gets him a job on his crew. One day, they were digging holes or something and my stepfather's hands began to blister and bleed. My step-dad asked my brother for a pair of gloves to protect his hands. "Oh what?", my brother replied. "You want a pair of b***h mittens?"
He waited over 15 years for that moment.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 10 months ago
Revenge is a dish best served cold using b***** mittens to protect your fingers from frostbite.
Nice Beast Ludo 9 months ago
Can't imagine letting anyone who treated a child like this go near a kid. Especially mine. It would only happen once. I can't imagine getting a "new dad" in your life and they treat you like absolute s**t. It would make me hate him and hate my mother more
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RELATED:
#2
Walking down the sidewalk in NYC with my wife, I saw a banana peel on the ground and was like "why do they always show people slipping on these? How slippery can they be?" I then proceeded to put all my weight on it, and totally did the legs flying up in the air landing on my butt thing like you see in cartoons. I look up and my wife was rolling her eyes to the point that I think she was seriously wondering how she married me.
Sergio Bicerra 10 months ago
Me too, when I was about 5. I hold my crying and cleaned it all cause I knew I would be the laughting stock for a month.
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comfort the lame 9 months ago
More common are dryer sheets. Get them up off the floor immediately. I can't believe the fall I survived slipping on one of those GD things...
Nice Beast Ludo 9 months ago
And that ALWAYS migrate to the floor. They will find a way.
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Nuku Nyara 9 months ago
They tested the banana peel slip in an episode of Mythbusters as well, one of my favorite episodes 🤩👍
Michael Largey 9 months ago
If you're not carefull, a banana peel can make you scale through the air.
#3
When I was in middle school my parents used to buy granola bars to have around as quick snacks for us kids. Well one day they came home with a Costco size box of Fiber One bars. I had no clue what fiber did, all I knew was those bars were tasty and I had an insatiable appetite, so I went to town. The next day at school my stomach was absolutely k*****g me. I mean it felt like steel wool was ripping around my intestines. It was so bad I had to have the school nurse call my parents to pick me up. When my dad arrived he asked if I had eaten anything unusual, so I fessed up to mowing through Fiber One bars.
Dad: "Do you know what fiber does?"
Me: "No."
Dad: "How many did you eat?"
Me: ".... six."
Cue the absolutely maniacal laughter from my father. That was about 20 years ago and I still haven't lived that one down.
Debbie Ryan (Deb) 10 months ago (edited)
His toilet now has ptsd Edit: just to clear things up i have ptsd and depression or I have PTSD and depression I've had them since I've been 16 so I think I'm going to spell it however I want 😅 🙃 pestd ptsd Ptsd PTSd also apologize for any grammar errors my hands aren't working right coz of arthritis nowadays
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
In America, those are legally classified as a "medicinal supplement" for the treatment of intermittent constipation! (joking! but for real, they are BRUTAL to the old colon!)
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Curious Panda 9 months ago
I feel for both the kid and the dad. I also used to eat whatever without consequences but found the hard way I was allergic to spinach. It gave me explosive d... when I was on a moving bus. That almost left me in an insane asylum for good. On the other hand, now that I'm a mom, I do let my son know how much of something is he allowed to eat. He still eats like a dumpster but at least I warn him there are consequences to everything we do.. and eat XD
Nikole 9 months ago
I can’t have squash for that reason… And it’s in soooooo many things at restaurants, especially for a vegetarian like me.
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Kelly Hartle 9 months ago
My uncles lived with my father when he was a kid (long story). They kept stealing his chocolate bars until he replaced the chocolate bars with chocolate Ex-Lax. They didn't do it again.
#4
When I was a welder we had a lot of people who thought using any kind of PPE was feminine from old guys to brand new 18 year olds. One day a guy was using the squint method to do a vertical weld and managed to splash some of the molten metal into his eyes. He's blind now and due to not using the PPE provided he wasn't able to get workers compensation or sue the corporation.
Chihuahua Mama 10 months ago
Fellas, is it feminine to have eyes that aren't resistant to sparks and molten metal?
Susie Elle 10 months ago
Is it feminine to not want to die from work-related injuries?
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Jennifer Drake 10 months ago
Nothing girlier than blindness and being broke! Must suck to be so fragile about one’s “manhood”.
Richard Iachetta 9 months ago
I can't tell you how embarrassed I am to be of the same gender as these dirt for brains who think that PPE use is feminine . I wonder if and when they played sports if they decided that a jock and/or a cup was unnecessary
Living Example 9 months ago
When I was in Thailand there were more guys than you'd think who were blind and seeking handouts. Their hands were a mass of scars. Turns out they were welders who started going blind due to no PPE, and kept on welding. By touch.
Gavin Johnson 9 months ago
Safety squints. The PPE of the REAL man (who isn’t worried about his future). Seriously, are we still defining ourselves by what we don’t use to ensure our own safety?
Geoffrey Scott 10 months ago
In USCG, had a yard period in Mobile. Did fire watch for a welder. I never looked at the arc, but the white bulkhead was enough for low grade flash burns...FYI
Brian Droste 9 months ago
How can you weld with the flash weld being so bright? That is more brighter than the sun.
#5
When I was 13 a friend and I hopped onto a slow moving freight train for...kid reasons.
Then we took a 7 hour ride through nowhere before it slowed down again.
Mom was pissed about that phone call.
Lowrider 56 9 months ago
A friend of mine did that, wound up almost 100 miles away and in a another state. Yea, his mom wasn't too happy.
Nuku Nyara 9 months ago
In my town some kids a couple years older than me tried to jump on a slow moving train. One didn't make it and the 2nd kid lost his legs and had prosthetics for the duration of his life.
Ervin Conn 9 months ago
I almost had the same thing happen. Did the "tuck and roll" thing when I realized the train was heading out of town.
Nice Beast Ludo 9 months ago
It's just one of those things you don't think to lecture about- "kids- NEVER jump on a slow moving train no matter how fun it looks!"
Nice Beast Ludo 9 months ago
Haha I'm watching Are You Afraid of the Dark- The tale of Train Magic and the giy just yelled "STAY AWAY FROM TRAINS, YOU HERE ME??!"
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Child of the Stars 10 months ago
As a parent, it's absolutely possible to be relieved that your child is ok and angry they did something dumb at the same time.
Load More Replies... #6
I started bullying the only kid who was geekier and smaller than me in high school for one reason, and one reason only - to impress the one girl who lived next-door to both of us.
On day one he kicked my a*s in front of the girl.
Atomic Giraffe 10 months ago
I never understood how bullying can be used to impress someone. How would that work?
Peter Bear 9 months ago
Hey, props to OP for owning up to it and presumably learning a lesson. A painful one, no doubt, but those are the ones that stick.
BarkingSquirell 9 months ago
You are a petty jerk and got what you deserved. May you be bullied throughout your lifetime.
Sue 9 months ago
Have girls ever been impressed by watching a guy beat someone up? (unless they were attacking her possibly)
James King 9 months ago
Yes. For whatever reason it's a turn-on to some women.
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#7
Tried c****ne and fell in love with it instantly. Suddenly I was this very social, outgoing guy who could finally drink like my bigger friends (I was about 130lbs at the time) without passing out by 9.
Once a month turned into once a week, which eventually became every day. Alcohol and c****ne. My two best friends. I became a man wh*re, and somehow managed not to get anyone pregnant or contract an STD.
What I did manage to do was ruin a marriage by sleeping with a married woman very regularly. I also lost jobs, lost friends and almost lost my life due to my addictions. I’m 5 years sober now, but some of the consequences of my actions are still hovering over my head.
C****ne IS a hell of a d**g.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
I had a substance abuse problem with cocaine as well. It was one of the only things that shut up all the bad thoughts in my head and made the bad feelings stop. I was more fortunate(?) than OP - my love affair with cocaine only cost me ~$7,000 instead of making me lose everything, including my life (I almost ODed a number of times, and one never knows what your hit might be contaminated with.) But there were a number of times - the near-ODs - when I got so effed up that I literally could not fall asleep for 3+ days. Did I feel GREAT when I'd just had a hit? You bet. Was it worth it? Fck no. Turns out my abusive relationship with my now-ex was causing my normal low-grade depression/suicidal ideation to spiral out of control, which is why I got into cocaine and other illegal substances via a co-worker. I was lucky that I didn't hit rock bottom before I realized where I was headed. I realized my cat Kohl needed me and I was responsible for her. I've been clean for 4 years now :)
Jennifer Drake 10 months ago
First of all, tell Kohl I said hi. Second of all…..HOLY S**T GIRL! I’m so proud of a stranger I don’t know. I lost my mom in 95 due to d**g addiction which led to HIV from a shared needle. Ever since then, I’ve been really aware of how hard it is to kick d***s and fix the pain that led you there to begin with. You’ve done an incredible job. 💙💙🐱🐱
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Just Another Karen 9 months ago
one day, loaded as f**k, I had an out-of-body experience and saw myself dying. had already overdosed before. 6 years sober now, and counting
Never Snarky 9 months ago
Congrats on being clean and sober. I was an active alcoholic for about 30 years. Once during that time I tried c*****e. Absolutely loved it so much it scared the s**t out of me. Made sure never to use it again. It was years before I quit drinking. Been sober for 24 years now, but I will always remember that c*****e h**h.
Living Example 9 months ago
To me, addiction is unique, knowing you have a deep problem that you know will not leave you alone, and that that very thing that you despise is the one thing that you truly feel you cannot walk away form. Not everyone is strong enough to stop what they see as an absolute necessity and cope unaided. It takes a lot of strength! Congrats and keep up the good work. To me, you are a hero in your world. Wear it proudly.
SkippityBoppityBoo 9 months ago
C*****e was easily available when I was working in certain bar jobs. Chefs, kitchen staff and bar staff. I did use it briefly to be able to work the insane hours I was working. I managed to stop without any medical or professional intervention. It's expensive in so many different ways that are not monetary.
Lowrider 56 9 months ago
Im still dealing with consequences of something that happened in 1980
#8
My uncle gave me some M-80s. I thought it would be good idea to light them up and put them in a large Fire-Ant nest, as a way to get rid of the ants. Turns out, all it does is p**s them off and make them airborn. I ended up getting a nice hot shower of Fire-Ants. I don't recommend it.
Brian Droste 9 months ago (edited)
There is a new show called The America's. They had a section on fire ants. They are relentless. They show no mercy when it comes to other insects. The insects need to remain absolutely still to be prevented from being attacked. Just the ever slightest movement and the ants will attack.
The Loneliest Monk 9 months ago
"a nice hot shower of Fire-Ants" I'm going to use this expression from now on.
James King 9 months ago
Fire ants are born p!$$ed off, live in a blind rage, and die cursing the universe and everything in it.
#9
I was a 7 YO at a kids party and we all walked down to the bodega on the corner for slushies. I finished mine and while we were all hanging at the pool, I noticed an unattended slushie another girl had. I was still thirsty and being a greedy little s**t, I put the straw to my lips for a sip.
I just didn’t realize a bee was stuck upside down in the straw, stinger first. Stinger meets lip. Swollen for days.
Greatest story of karma I’ve ever encountered.
WindySwede 10 months ago
Prob, but hard to tell now. And also the pic is prob a solitary bee, mainly out after pollen and not really a stinger?
Load More Replies... Nice Beast Ludo 9 months ago
My daughter always wants to hear this story cause she thinks it's funny- one time my dad had left a McDonald's drink on the counter (in the 90's when the drink containers were waxy cardboard and not see through) and the little soda-deprived child that I was (at this point of the story I make a conspiratorial thinking hand gesture under my chin and change my voice to a h**h pitched villain) "oooohhhhh sodies!!!" Then sprint across the kitchen to greedily chug it down. Expected some coca cola- got my first mouthful of beer. Luckily I was right next to the sink. It was just awful. My dad got in more trouble than me and started using a thermos to hide his day drinking lol
#10
When I was a teenager, I had a serious chip on my shoulder. One day, some guy got in my friend’s face, and I decided to intervene. Without thinking, I hit him. Back then, I was a wrestler and had the strength to match, so I completely wrecked the kid without much effort.
Suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder, pulling me away from him. I turned around and found myself face-to-face with his brother. As it turns out, this guy was famous for being on the Olympic wrestling team. And for some reason—probably fueled by adrenaline or stupidity—I swung on him.
What happened next humbled me instantly. He caught my arm mid-swing like it was nothing and just held it there. He looked at me with mild annoyance and tightened his grip ever so slightly. It wasn’t painful, but the sheer strength in his hand, combined with how effortlessly he restrained me, made one thing clear: if he wanted to hurt me, I wouldn’t stand a chance.
I froze, realizing how badly this could go for me. I apologized right away, saying we’d leave. He just nodded and let us walk away, like it wasn’t worth his time.
That moment stuck with me. It was a quiet, powerful lesson: sometimes, it’s better to back down, because there are people out there who could utterly wreck you if they wanted to. It’s something I’ve never forgotten.
HurlWurk 9 months ago
Professionals rarely fight because for them, the stakes are much higher. They are taught that, if they do, the charges are instantly a*****t with a deadly weapon, so to be absolutely sure it's a case of self defense that they could not back down from or escape.
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Charlotte A. 10 months ago
Maybe they should also have learned to exert that same constraint - that they could have helped their friend by just making the other kid back off, instead of actually hurting them. Seems to me they only learned half the lesson.
Peter Bear 9 months ago
True strength is quiet. It doesn't need to yell, because it speaks for itself. Cowards and weaklings brag about their strength; the truly strong person need say nothing.
Bewarethere@gmail.com 9 months ago
Olympic wrestler? But he's still in school. I call b******t!
#11
At the tender age of 5, I thought the tweezers were the perfect shape to fit the outlet. That day I found out how much force my dad had in his leg to kick me away from where I was stuck getting cooked.
howdylee 10 months ago
When I was 2 or 3 years old, I put a metal key into the power outlet... I vividly remember doing so, because I wanted to pretend I was driving a car like mommy. I remember my older brother washing my hands in the bathroom sink afterwards, I think my parents were cleaning the charred marks off the wall/carpet. That might have been the moment my memory was jolted into h**h gear :)
Bigmomma 9 months ago
My younger brother was about 3yr old maybe a yr or 2 older was back in 90s so a while ago, he decided to put wet tissue paper in plug socket, it wasn't until he screamed that my mum came from the kitchen and saw him and the socket that she realised what he had done, my mum cuddled him and when he calmed down he said the plug socket bit him. We still torment him about it now
Heather Menard 9 months ago
I saw this happen to a little kid I was seven he was probably four or five. I have not and will not mess with electricity. I'm 55 and still have never seen anything like that.
Philly Bob 9 months ago (edited)
I used to joke about being 4 years old, I had no idea who Ben Franklin was or how he discovered electricity. I do quite well remember how I discovered it though! LOL! I also discovered how far a bobby pin could shoot across a room followed by many pissed-off sparks!
Fat Harry (Oi / You) 10 months ago
I'll say again: US sockets (and electrics in general) scare the c**p out of me.
Eric Lancaster 8 months ago
I tried to hold the bent prongs of a plug together to stick them in a 220v socket. Blew me across the room. Mom came in and just shook her head. FAFO
Hinrik Ævarsson 9 months ago
I'm extremely thankful for breakers ever since I was fixing a busted hinge on my dishwasher and in the process I had unscrewed the interior metal sheet from the door, and something got unplugged. Since the original task wasn't electrical I hadn't unplugged the dishwasher, so when I plugged the hing back in I was suddenly conducting enough electricity to not only knock out the kitchen, but the main breaker for the house. I live alone and wasn't expecting any company anytime soon. Gave me a pinhole burn hole and had me jittery for 30 minutes or so. Got the hinge fixed though.
#12
My neighbor was remodeling her attic into a game room. She had stacks of beautiful old furniture including a Tiffany-esque lamp. She asked me if i wanted it but warned me it was probably going to need to be rewired because it was from 1910 or something. I got it home, cleaned it thoroughly and plugged it in to admire the glass panels. Great, worked fine. Then I went to move it and touched the bottom while it was plugged in. (The metal base was missing a part). The resulting shock gave me a glimpse of the afterlife and I sat there stunned for about 20 seconds checking if my heart was still beating. Yes, it did need to be rewired.
Mrs.C 10 months ago
Tried to unplug Grandma's antique piano light. The plug was stuck and as I wiggled it out, my fingers slipped and made full contact with the sides of the plugs. I don't remember much for about 10 seconds.
Jenn Smith 10 months ago
Yes, fun old lamps! I was replacing a light bulb and wondered if the socket would really do what I'd seen in cartoons. Yes, kids, yes it does. My actual bones tingled for some time...don't hate me but it was SHOCKING! I was a young teen way back then
#13
Ate an entire ghost pepper on a dare. Spent the next hour crying in the bathroom with milk and yogurt. My taste buds filed for divorce that day.
KrazyChiMama 10 months ago
I ate a Carolina reaper on a dare and vomited so hard I broke blood vessels in my eyes…no more dares for me!
Hile Troy 10 months ago
Always figured those were pretty punitive, but "vomited my eyes out" was not among the sufferings I envisioned.
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Tim Steil 9 months ago
party once, and there were a couple of surgeons there. Pretty douchey, typical stereotypical surgeon behavior. One made a crack about me. Then he reaches down and grabs a Carolina Reaper out of a bowl, (set there as a centerpiece etc) and popped it in his mouth and started chewing. He spent about the next hour or so crying while his wife and the lady hosting took turns feeding him white bread and milk trying to cut the heat. Crying like a p**k. Perfect karma. Still brings a smile to my face.
Philly Bob 9 months ago
I enjoy hot peppers. A habenero or a scotch bonnet is my upper limits.I love tabasco too! But...I ate a reaper once on a dare. For about an hour, I could have outdone a hagfish in the slime and mucus department. I swaer I had slime and snot coming out of everywhere probably including my ears and eye sockets. Won't be doing that again!
SkippityBoppityBoo 9 months ago
Upvoted you Dee because you might not know if you're severely allergic to a certain food etc. I'm allergic to Capsicum and this could have probably literally killed me due to going into Anaphylaxis.
Load More Replies... KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
Jamaican hm made slow lamb on xmas day - omitted to mention the 8 bonnets... Jack's bowel was furious...
Lee451 Henderson 9 months ago
I worked on the pacqui ghost death chip recall. I kept 3 but have no desire to try one.
#14
Someone I knew wanted to open her marriage even though her husband didn’t want to. He said he didn’t like it but wouldn’t stop her. She couldn’t find anything more than casual hookups while he started dating an ex. He’s with the ex now now and they are getting divorced. .
S Mi 10 months ago
No idea why such a balanced, respectful comment is being down voted
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Anastasia Beaverhausen 9 months ago
I feel like if you want an open relationship you need to start off open. Deciding later to open a relationship just seems like the beginning of the end.
Uncle Schmickle 9 months ago
Why get married in the first place if that's not the type of relationship you want ?
KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
I'm still not really on board with the whole opening a marriage later in the marriage. It essentially screams you are bored and want to cheat but not leave the marriage.
Joanne Earle 9 months ago
My stepson and his g/f tried this several years ago and he ended up connecting w/ someone and she could never close the deal on her end so now she accuses him of cheating on her.
#15
Back in my highschool days, the principal decided it was a good idea to implement a bookbag size rule, with stringent size limits on both extreme ends. Now, I was the one kid who broke the upper limit with my large rolly-polly bag. I had it listed as a medical device on my IEP just to make sure I could keep it. (The reason I could do this in the first place is another adventure) But the lower end?
This is a high school. The youngest girls are 13. These girls menstruate. A lot girls carry small bags with their pads and such. Now, the teachers didn't have any issues with this, because it's not like they can hold it. What are they going to do? Well, the administration are sticklers for rules, and the bags *are* smaller than allowed.
Needless to say, a lot of girls got their pads stolen. A lot of fathers find out. A lot of them are understandably *very f*****g angry*. Three or four of them walk into the principal's office about 2 weeks after the rule was implemented. There was a very loud scuffle for about 15 minutes, bags were returned, and the rule was never enforced again. Principal had a limp for the rest of the year.
Mrs.C 10 months ago
My daughter was in HS when the principal (of his own accord and this is not actually legal) decided to implement a "see through only" bag rule. Cue every senior girl making a purse out of a ziplock bag and stuffing them full of tampons and pads, or tucking pads half into their pockets, or tampon s behind their ears for weeks. The entire school looked like Kotex gone Wild. Eventually a dad (& former school board member) gathered information from every surrounding district and went to the board. Turns out the principal had no right to create a rule outside of the handbook entirely on his own. Not only was that rule dropped, but the handbook rule about see through book bags was dropped.
Nikole 9 months ago
They do that too in some schools here (Chicago) to make sure the kids aren’t carrying a weapon in their bag.
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Peter Bear 9 months ago
We talk a lot about Momma Bear energy, but don't s***w around with Dad Bears either.
Dr Jimmy 03 9 months ago
Unless this story is coming from 80 years ago, from a tiny private school, or from a very strange and distant culture, it's not passing smell tests. School administrator is in a "scuffle" that doesn't have people jailed? "Scuffle" lasting 15 minutes? Did the "principal's" limp disappear months later? Bogus, AI training, or both.
Sophia Pandia de Delphia 9 months ago (edited)
Oh my dear child... My dad started out nice and, 15 minutes in, the principal agreed to leave me alone for all of high school. No limp but something like this happened. My dad was also notorious for threatening the a*****e driver of my school bus. He missed my stop and let me off in a blind spot. Dad saw him go by and was getting on as I barely got off. Only a shirt was grabbed. I imagine my dad got away with this because we were a rural,. county wide school system. It was more trouble to involve police or the sheriff. My dad knowing the sheriff didn't help the principal.
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Cpt. Christan "Panda Bombero" 9 months ago (edited)
If I had a daughter, and he had done that, he would need a new job.
Dori 9 months ago
He walked with a limp, as in something in his leg, knee, ankle, etc was damaged.
Load More Replies... Theora Fifty-five Johnson 23 hours ago
"Principal had a limp for the rest of the year." ??? Nah, you a*****t the principal, the police get called. So, bogus ending. Free menstrual supplies in schools. My Dem group did a donation event for school supplies and found out that lots of girls really need them. So we did another donation event.
#16
At 18, I had a *real grown-up job* and decided to splurge a bit when I got my first check. I bought a party tray of 2-dozen chocolate chip cookies from the local Safeway (if you know, you know) and decided to eat some. Some turned into 24.
I s**t my pants on the way to work, turned around and left, s**t my pants again on the way home. S**t for two days straight.
I can’t look at a chocolate chip cookie without feeling my b******e quiver. .
Laura Lawson 9 months ago
Sorry, not all of us are from America. So I don't know. What the h**l was in those cookies?!?
UKGrandad 10 months ago (edited)
"..from the local Safeway (if you know, you know).." If you know what? Safeway stores were everywhere, it's hardly information known only to the 'in' crowd. EDIT: FFS, why is this getting downvotes? Safeway is not a closely guarded secret, for crying out loud.
Regina Holt 10 months ago
Safeway stores are not everywhere. They are in less than half of the US states.
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Charles McChristy 10 months ago
It was more likely all of the butter and sugar.
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Serena Myers 10 months ago
We had Safeway in the UK till 2004, when it was bought out by Morrisons. It was in Safeway, Canterbury, UK, 1994, that I realised I was ill. 'Flu, Nasty couple of weeks, so nasty that after all this time I can remember exactly where I was!
#17
As kids my brothers and I were playing with hairspray and lighters to do the whole flame torch thing 😂. Well my mom found the supplies behind the couch one morning. She was wearing a soft robe. She wanted to show us what happened when we played with fire. She took the lighter and lit her arm on fire. However, the flame spread a lot faster than she anticipated and her whole arm caught fire and she was freaking out trying to get it out. She sure showed us what playing with fire will do.
Regina Holt 10 months ago
Mom was stupid for using her arm to teach them a lesson. I guess she REALLY wanted to show them the dangers.
Courtney Christelle 9 months ago
I looked out the kitchen window and saw a fire going in the driveway. I ran out and d**g the hose over. Turns out my son and his friends started a fire in a plastic bucket, not realizing that it would melt. They did this right next to a big pile of dead leaves and dry trees. Funny now but holy c**p did it scare me at the time.
Nice Beast Ludo 9 months ago
What did she think would happen? And I thought this whole post was going to be about fire gone wrong. I guess the title was not to be taken literally
#18
Put my finger on a hot car cigarette lighter. I didn’t think it was hot because it wasn’t red, it was white. Btw, this was like 45 years ago.
BiggBoii 10 months ago (edited)
I did this...more than once. part of the "If we could, we would also try touch the sun! " club
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Mrs.C 10 months ago
Gen-X's scar of choice is from those stupid things. I branded my thumb while Mom grocery shopped. Thankfully, it just blistered and popped.
Jumping Jellyfishes 10 months ago
Lol... that puff of white smoke. Smelled like burning hair
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Lord of the laserprinter. 10 months ago
Yeah, people of a certain age have all reconfigured their fingerprints this way.
Divado 10 months ago
Did this one with an electric ring cooker to see how quickly it heated up. Faster than you'd think. Had a concentric ring pattern on the palm of my hand for AGES.
Laura Lawson 9 months ago
I'm thinking it's closer to 100%! I did the exact same thing.
Load More Replies... Sergio Bicerra 10 months ago
Not with a car lighter but an iron in my uncle's home, wanted to know if it was hot. It was. Had blisters size of olives until my dad popped them with a needle. I was 4 or 5 and curious and stupid.
Jeffery Gorgonzola 10 months ago
Used a sparkler once, blew on it cause I thought that would cool it down, then stuck my finger on the end....let me tell you...it was not cooled down.
#19
Stuck my laptop charger to my tongue out of curiosity.
Don't do that.
Jrog 10 months ago
Nowadays laptop chargers work typically at 19V. So, on your tongue that's pretty intense.
MushroomHead22 9 months ago
this might just have cause several people to try this. i had my intrusive thought, but i was able to push it down.
#20
I worked in a night club. Someone attacked the bouncer and was ejected with a bop on the head and a "don't f**ken come back.
The guy came back, he grabbed a lady inappropriately. Two bouncers grabbed him and took him out the back door and beat the c**p out of him and took his wallet.(they took it into the police station the next day).
MushroomHead22 9 months ago
they didn't really have a choice, if they didn't it would be stealing. their options were 1. give him back the wallet and let him go home and nothing happened. or 2. bring the wallet to the cops, explain what happened and the guy will have no choice but to go pick it up.
Load More Replies... kitten levels tokyo 9 months ago
You have to get hit pretty hard to get the clap beat out of you.
#21
I was four. My brother had the flu and was getting so much attention. Attention I wanted.
Four year old me proceeds to run out in the middle of winter, all but(t) naked, screaming that I wanted the flu.
I got the flu.
I did NOT want the flu.
LuckyL 10 months ago
but that's how you make it easier forthe flu your brother gave you - while your body is fighting for keeping you alive in the cold
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Christy Roebuck 8 months ago
Check out the old kids' book "I Wish I Was Sick, Too!" by Franz Brandenburg
#22
Wondered if the ice was thick enough to cross the river.
It wasn't.
I'll tell you, being on the wrong side of the ice can really motivate you to move fast.
Luckily, not a big river - was able to get close to the bank and break back through there.
Michael Largey 9 months ago
The ice is always thick enough to cross the river - if you can swim that far in cold water.
Cpt. Christan "Panda Bombero" 9 months ago
I am a certified Ice Rescue Instructor and Ice Rescue Technician. Simple rule about ice; it always looks like good ice, until are on it, and find out that it is not.
Becky Samuel 9 months ago
Even better, just don't risk your life by going out there at all.
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Jan Moore 9 months ago
When we first moved to Germany I was about 7-8 years old. A bunch of my new friends and I decided to hike up the frozen river as far as we could. It was so cool to be able the climb the small waterfalls and on the ice. We finally got to the biggest falls that didn't freeze at the bottom, it had an open area at the bottom with a large ice island in it. We decided it would be fun to climb on it. About half of us managed to get on it before it thrown off. We all had to walk home wet to chest level. I'm surprised we all didn't die of hypothermia.
#23
I was swimming with a group of friends in a river. I wandered off upstream after smoking a joint and didn’t tell anyone. All alone, high af, I got in the river and started swimming with the current.
It felt like I was supersonic swimming.
I decided I’d had enough and when I went to stand up in the shallow water, I was swept off my feet.
Next thing I knew I was in some rapids. I couldn’t do anything, just observe my stupid a*s get thrashed around as I was forced under, and watch huge rocks barely miss my head as I flew by. At that point I was not expecting a good result.
Just when I resigned myself to my fate, it all went quiet and calm. I’d made it through somehow and was able to get on my feet unscathed and pale as a ghost so my friends said. I was right back to where they were. They laughed because they knew exactly what happened.
Chris the Bobcat 9 months ago
That's solid Gen X logic there. What didn't k**l us got us laughed at.
Chris the Bobcat 9 months ago
K!ll. K!ll. K!ll K!ll K!ll K!ll K!ll! Stupid fvcking censorship bots...
Load More Replies... James King 9 months ago
From your name, you're not a guy. It's a guy thing.
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James King 9 months ago
I get cottonmouth when $t0ned, so I drink lots of water.
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Kise Miarse 10 months ago
So he swam, and then was dragged, downstream . . . and ended up back where he started? *squints*
Papa 10 months ago
Did you miss the part where he said "I wandered off upstream"?
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geezeronthehill 9 months ago
If you have to swim a rapids, keep your feet pointed downstream. Try not to hit any rocks with your fundament; that really hurts.
KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
You don't have to smoke that s**t to be stupid. "hold my beer".
Load More Replies... #24
When I was a “bouncer” there was a small scuffle at the bar and I went to go steaming in, work mate tells me to slow down. I don’t listen. Ended up the guy fighting played for Leicester Tigers (rugby) and he absolutely manhandled me like I was a small child!
I found out.
RedHairedDragon 10 months ago (edited)
Bouncers job is to deescalate, not to be stupid and rush into situations. When I grew up there was this bouncer that was famous for always starting fights and making them worse. Whenever we saw him at the door at a place we went to some other place, not to risk anything.
Sue 9 months ago
Yep, my ex was a bouncer & they always asked what he would do in a situation. If it was just to beat them up, no job.
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Earonn - 10 months ago
I mean, isn't that a bouncer's job? What else are they for, looking on while that guy beats up a guy or rapes a girl because boohoohoo, even with two of them they could get their hair in disarray? Good for OP to do his job properly!
RedHairedDragon 10 months ago
Bouncers job is to deescalate, not to be stupid and rush into situations. When I grew there was this bouncer that was famous for always starting fights and making them worse. Whenever we saw him at the door at a place we went to some other place, not to risk anything.
Load More Replies... #25
My life is full of them, but most recently I decided to DIY a small bathroom makeover in my basement. Mostly retrofit, drywall, laminate flooring. 3 months and a couple of thousand later it's still unfinished and I need to hire someone to finish. How, you ask, is this FAFO? My brother is a gifted GC who does not live close said "man, its tricky, and can turn into a money pit quick, just hire someone"......
BrownEyedPanda 9 months ago
It's a lot less expensive to hire a professional than to attempt to DIY, only to end up hiring someone to repair the damage you caused. A former landlord kept hiring one of his friends to do remodeling (kitchen, for example). It took a h**l of a lot longer to get the job done. Bring unable to use the kitchen sink, I could feel my sanity and will to live slowly slipping away.
Bored Trash Panda 9 months ago
try that with your entire bathroom..... we had to use the bathroom in the model apartment in the next building over for almost three months because our ceiling caved in due to massive water damage (not our fault) and stupid state laws didn't require them to pay for a hotel for us.
Load More Replies... #26
Decided not to use a condom with my husband. We were both on the fence about having kids. We thought, it couldn't happen if we did it just once, right? I'm 30 weeks pregnant with fraternal twins now.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
Condoms can break. Both people should have been on a form of birth control if they were on the fence about having children.
Richard Iachetta 9 months ago
That what could happen if we just do it once has led to a lot of teenage pregnancies. At least they were stupid teenagers, what is your excuse
Jan Moore 9 months ago
When we got married we decided to wait till our 2nd anniversary to try and get pregnant. I used BC pills. At 2 years went to my OB/GYN for a checkup, since I was an RN he wanted me to make sure I'd already had German Measles. I got tested and found out I had not, so I got the vaccine. Then he breaks it to me that I needed to wait 3 months. OK out with the condoms and BC Foam. then I had allergy testing and found out I'm allergic to everything. So I started getting the shots. Then the Allergist says to wait till I'd gotten to a maintenance dose so I was getting the shots twice a week, then I had a reaction and he said I had to get them only once a week. Saw my OB/GYN and he said he didn't think it matter. So stopped all forms of BC and got pregnant in one month.
Edward Loopyderm 9 months ago (edited)
Only takes one male swimmy cell, Myrtle the fertile turtle.
Sophia Pandia de Delphia 9 months ago
I've always called myself Fertile Myrtle as a joke. Glad to know my family didn't make it up. I never wanted kids and still don't. But there is something patently wrong with all these people who want bio children can't and I can but won't ever. I'm probably Fertile Myrtle but I'll never find out.
Load More Replies... #27
One day while I was driving down the road, I was punching my windshield (lightly) because it was making a funny sound
My buddy in the passenger seat: “You’re going to crack your windshield.”
Me: “No I won’t.” *windshield punch*
Windshield: “Crack”
Me: “…”.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 10 months ago
Reminds me of a story from teh brewing industry. The brewery had glass lined tanks. One day an FNG slaps one with a wrench and hears a funny sound. It doesn't sound like that again when he tries it again. He finds out the tank next to it does. But only once. He goes down teh whole line cracking these extremely expensive glass lined tanks.
Lady Eowyn 10 months ago
FNG? Remember, terms familiar to one job or hobby - or location - might be totally unfamiliar to anyone else. Please be kind to your fellow Pandas and spell out a few more things.
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LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
Um, it seems a wee bit dangerous to be punching one's own windshield while one is driving said vehicle. At the very least, you have one hand off the wheel and are focusing at least part of your attention on punching the windshield instead of focusing your attention fully on the road/driving.
Mike F 9 months ago
My brother and I worked with a painter many years ago. He was obsessed with showing his "manliness" and would randomly punch his windshield, until he c*****d it. He stopped punching random objects.
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Kalikima 9 months ago
I thought it was Safelite that had the jingle? "Safelite repair, Safelite replace."
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Becky Samuel 9 months ago
I had a large golfing umbrella in the car with me and when I came to get out it tapped against the inside of the windshield fairly lightly. That's when I found out that windshields are fragile from the inside.
#28
Drove through a large puddle in the road going around 45mph
It was deeper than I thought and a giant wave of water completely covered the windshield and I almost lost control.
Luckily it was around 530am and nobody else was on that road but it was quite shocking. .
Nina 10 months ago
At that speed it's quite easy to lose control, even without a covered windshield
Anonymouse 10 months ago
puddles on the road at speed = hydroplaning, and are a real FAFO. same with black ice - the feeling of having absolutely NO control over the auto, even as it goes inexorably towards the guardrail, or another car is terrifying.
Jenn Smith 10 months ago
That's terrifying! Here in rural Southern US, we drivers of tiny cars must watch out for the Giant trucks. They also cause huge waves of water..but they don't care because they have a giant truck and don't care to slow down for any reason. Fun stuff
Mrs.C 10 months ago
A friend in h**h school was leaving a neighborhood down a road he wasn't familiar with. Hit what looked like a bit of water across the road and floated his car. Totaled it due to water damage.
Lady Eowyn 10 months ago
Around here the weather and traffic people always say, if you see a puddle, turn around, don't drown.
Learner Panda 9 months ago
When my son was learning to drive, I got him to hold (loosely) the steering wheel while I drove through a deep puddle. He felt the kick and years later told me it was a really good learning experience.
Robert Trebor 9 months ago
I was cruising through Delaware in my Triumph Spitfire, and I came to a place where the roadway was flooded. Now the Triumph can go through a little bit of flooding because the air intakes for the carburetors were up on top of the engine, but before I drove into this I wanted to make sure that it wouldn't go too h**h. Put on my ratty sneakers that I had in the trunk and walked through it to make sure I could get through. I was pretty sure I could and in fact I did make it. I was stopped on the other side putting my good shoes back on when another car came along going the other direction, and I'm waving trying to get his attention he hit that water got to the middle and stalled. I went on my way.
Peeka_Mimi 9 months ago (edited)
I was driving to school on a snowy, icy day. I got cocky and sped up. I almost went off that bridge or hit someone. It's a miracle that nothing happened. Now I'm absolutely terrified about driving in snow. I taught myself to drive and age 52 I suck at it so I try to avoid it.
Kalikima 9 months ago
I did that once, I was in a SUV though, so it didn't wash over my windshield.. it did fly into my open windows though. Lol muddy, dirty water all over the inside of my car. Never did that again.
Nikole 9 months ago
It happened to me in my 1991 Jeep Cherokee many years ago. I was on Lake Shore Drive, which has a speed limit of 45 mph, but of course most people go faster. It had been raining and I was in the left most lane when I saw a large puddle on the road in front of me. No big deal… Oh yes big deal. The water cascaded over my windshield and pushed my Jeep, which made me blind and having to keep the car straight. I don’t know how I did it, but I came out unscathed. Would not recommend.
Load More Replies... #29
I was hitting a rock with a hammer as a kid, well the rock eventually flew up right into my eye ball. Took my family an hour to convince me that my eye didn’t pop.
Gracie Mae 9 months ago
my sister did something similar as a young child (don't ask why or how she was able to get away with having a hammer at the age of 3-4)--she swung the hammer too far back and the claw part got stuck in the top of her head! My first experience with head wounds bleeding so much. Scary
#30
I got my finger stuck in a bottle trying to get more cream out, my finger quickly became swollen and purple, I had to go to the ER .
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
I mean, who amongst us HASN'T stuck our finger into a hole that we shouldn't have?
#31
I went outside with the Marine to settle things like men, or so I'm told.
HurlWurk 9 months ago
After a Marine explains things to you, memory loss from the beating is a common result.
Load More Replies... #32
At work I decided to step over a rolled up carpet that was blocking the aisle. Instead of carefully navigating over or around it, I decided to jump over it. My toe caught on the stretch wrap and I went knee first onto the concrete at high speed. Split my knee to the bone and was out of work for a month.
Verfin22 10 months ago
Stock photo is of an ACL tear. OP could've broken the knee cap, which would need healing time.
Lee Jacobson 9 months ago
Those scars are from total knee replacement. I have 2 of them.
Load More Replies... #33
New hire at work was running the press brake. A large hydraulic machine that bends metal. He was holding the part with one hand and letting his other hand rest on the bed of the machine. Hit the foot pedal, top die comes down, and folds the part.
Three different times he was told NOT to put his free hand on the machine bed. He would say okay, and after a few parts go right back to doing it again.
He got into a rhythm and didn't pay attention to where he placed his free hand. Instead of resting it on the bed, he placed it on the bottom die. Top die came down with 35 tons of pressure and his four fingers were crushed off.
Mrs.C 10 months ago
Ours had buttons you had to push with both hands to engage the press. Probably saved many a finger.
Geoffrey Scott 10 months ago
As much as a pain in the a*s as 'leashes' are, they are there for a reason.
#34
Dated a mentally ill person who told me from the very start that they're mentally ill and that a relationship would be extremely difficult. They were right.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
I don't like this. The person told OP very honestly where they were in terms of mental illness, and OP still wanted a relationship - the mentally ill can be very vulnerable and desperate for human contact/love, since not every mentally ill person has a supportive family/friend group. The mentally ill person may have been so desperate for affection that, despite their warning to OP, they allowed themselves to be forced into a relationship with OP. Not saying that that's what actually happened, but the person clearly said that a relationship with them would be "difficult" due to their mental illness, and clearly OP pushed for it/pursued one anyway. Feels manipulative and disingenuous on OP's part.
Kise Miarse 10 months ago
Perhaps. Or maybe OP just didn't have a lot of experience with mental illness (or at least the type involved) and really thought they could work it out.
Load More Replies... Sue 9 months ago
But I can fix you! Met a guy at a bar, went to pick him up for a date. His mom answered & said "he's not allowed to have visitors." He'd just gotten out of the mental ward.
My O My 9 months ago
I was on one too. Why isn't he allowed to live his life???
Load More Replies... #35
I was at an amusement park on the boardwalk (Ocean City Maryland) with a friend and I wanted to get up on the Zipper. The Zipper is a ride that has been around forever, the individual cabins seating two are like sacrificial cages with 2 bars to hang on to for dear life. You move in a circle while spinning in alternate directions is the best way I can describe it.
My friend (Yvonne) said, no way. She insisted she would throw up if she did that ride. I advised her that neither of us had eaten anything recently so she has nothing to throw up. I kept twisting her arm, she finally gave in... all the time repeatedly saying she's going to vomit.
So we're on the ride, full stop. I'm laughing and screaming... and Yvonne starts vomiting. Here's what happens if you puke while spinning around on the Zipper... The puke hits the mesh cage part and then flies back... lands all over you (hair, face, clothing, everything). I was hollering for the attendant to stop the ride, of course that makes him keep going, and faster.
Finally when the ride stopped (Yvonne saying I told you so 100 times), i jumped off and ran into the ocean with my pocketbook on my shoulder. I had to get all of that vomit OFF of me. I walked back toward the Zipper, the attendant was hosing off our cage.
Jenn Smith 10 months ago
And yeah, there's always a water hose near the Zipper!
Load More Replies... Kalikima 9 months ago (edited)
My hịgh school boyfriend convinced me to ride one once, even though I told him I'm terrified of going upside-down. We get on it and I'm screaming and clutching the bars hard. He kept trying to calm me down, and forced my hand off the bars, trying to hold it. Well I grabbed the bar with his hand in my hand so hard that he actually bruised! I inadvertently got revenge though, the deal was I'd ride it if he'd ride the ferris wheel with me, which is my favorite ride. We get up there, turns out he's terrified of heights! He never told me that, and I'd known him for 4 years at that point. I'm much nicer than he is though, I wouldn't have picked that ride if I'd known he was scared. I was hoping it would be romantic.. lol
Michelle Carlson 9 months ago
Oh man, my husband LOVES that ride. I absolutely hate it. I feel like I'm going to fall out the front of the cage the entire time.
#36
Ex husband treated me like dirt. Called me ugly, told me he was having pity on me by touching me, etc. Cheated on me a lot. Boy was he shocked when I gave him divorce papers. Now he is the victim and I am so mean and taking his money to take care of our kids.....
Richard Iachetta 9 months ago
Good for you. I'm sorry it took you as long as it did to realize the only thing he was worth was leaving, but I'm ecstatic that he is pissed and thinks you're the bad guy. I hope you find a person who appreciates for the person you are
#37
When Pokemon go first game out (first week) it was rumored that ghost Pokemon could only be found at cemeteries. The biggest one In LA should work thought so drove myself there.
As I was driving through there were several funerals taking place and I just thought how morally wrong this was, and I shouldn’t be doing it. But I pressed on…
Found a hillside to park with no one around and got out of the car and started roaming around with my phone. About 20 seconds into looking I heard some pound horns blowing and I witnessed half the hillside explode, like giant explosions trigger one after another 100 yards away. A giant wall of dirt and dust almost got me as I jumped back into my car. A few guys in construction outfits came up to a min later asking how I got there. I pointed out the roadway to which they realized they hadn’t blocked off. Nothing more was said and I left
Needles to say, f****d around looking for ghosts Pokemon and almost became one.
Divado 10 months ago
They BLEW UP a CEMETERY? Is this an American thing? What happened to R.I.P?
Sam Trudeau 9 months ago
Actually a human version of how a ghost came up in the original games. Humans and pokemon, or in this case humans and humans, wrong place at the wrong time
#38
Went bowling as a kid. Wanted to know why stepping across the foul line was such a big deal.
That was how I learned bowling lanes were lubricated. And probably what a pulled groin felt like.
Upstaged75 9 months ago
Very slippery. There are tons of funny videos of people wiping out by doing that.
#39
12 years old, Throwing rocks with friends at windows in an abandoned building
We were competing to see who could get the highest window
I sling a beautiful throw
rock sails all the way to the top window and cracks it
rock then proceeds to follow the law of gravity all the way down
to bounce off my head.
Upstaged75 9 months ago
My brother busted his hand one time when we were TP'ing (throwing toilet paper on) an empty house in the neighborhood. He thought he'd get better height if he tied a rock to the end of the TP. It came flying right back down on to his hand.
#40
I got stoned and found a Pinterest post about cat palmistry. According to the obviously reliable source, you can tell your cat's personality based on their toe beans - adorable, right?
Tried it on my first, gentle cat and he was cool with it - he liked me massaging his paws. My second cat, only a few months into living with us, was less cool with it but let me look at her paw. Finally, I tried it with my third cat. I got the s**t scratched out of me. I let her run away and looked to my spouse like, "yeah, that checks out."
Tldr: cat palmistry results in as many scratches as you would anticipate it would.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
::totally did not just order a book on cat "paw-mistry":: >_>; What?! It's for entertainment purposes! I swear! XD (but I absolutely WILL let everyone know what the results are for my 2 adult cats and my 3 kittens........)
Regina Holt 10 months ago
Reading the first three words of the story gives one an idea that things did not end well.
#41
A year or so ago, I decided it was a great idea to try and fix my car’s brakes myself instead of paying a mechanic. Watched a couple of YouTube videos and thought, "How hard can it be?" Spoiler: very hard. I ended up with a car that wouldn’t stop properly and nearly rolled into a mailbox during the test drive. Had to sheepishly call a tow truck and spend even more money getting a professional to fix both the brakes and the extra damage I caused. Definitely found out on that one.
Jenn Smith 10 months ago
YouTube can be so convincing. I tried to repair my own washer. Ended up trapped behind it, with a gallon size freezer bag of " extra" parts, and a gushing leak from the plumbing I broke, as I tried vaulting myself out of the crevice behind said washer...would have been cheaper and less painful to just find a new ( to me) washer!😁
#42
When I was little, maybe 4ish years old? My grandma was supposed to be watching me but left me alone to go chat with her neighbor friend. I decided to climb on her dresser & jump across the maybe two and a half foot gap to her bed. Multiple times. I remember my tiny brain saying “okay, one more time before grandma comes home and gets mad at me”. The last time I jumped, I missed. I cracked my forehead on her metal bed frame. Seven stitches later, I decided I’d probably not try that, again.
Mrs.C 10 months ago
I was the same age and Grandma did the same thing only I was supposed to be napping. There was a cologne bottle in the window and I pulled it out with one hand, while sticking my other arm out the window. Turns out the cologne bottle was holding the 100 year old window open. It slammed down and trapped my arm. I screamed for quite a while before Grandma heard me and came running. I got a trip to the ER (nothing broken) and Grandma sobbed hysterically when she told my mom (her DIL). Mom said, "C was supposed to be taking a nap. It's not your fault she wasn't doing what she was told."
#43
My sober alcoholic dad educated me and warned about the genetic likelihood (and probably saw personality traits) of the danger of my becoming an alcoholic myself someday. He started talking about it openly when I was about 10.
Around 23 I started f*****g around. I found out.
The good news is that my dear father’s education denied me any luxury of denial.
Sober 17 years now.
#44
I went to a haunted house with 3 people my dad said not to go with in a neighborhood he said not to go to. They started a fight with 4 locals. Two of them and three of us required an ambulance. I drove home alone and hurt without having any fun at all.
Curious Panda 9 months ago
Maybe listen to your parents every once in a while. You're lucky you made it out fo there alive.
#45
Several years back, my friend & I were leaving a mutual friend’s house & found a stray cat. The people who had been sheltering him had just thrown him out because he sprayed.
My friend & I agreed to split the duty of caring for him: She would take him for the time being & I would get him fixed & take care of him while he recovered, maybe permanently.
Well, we got him fixed, and when he was picked up, the vet at the humane society gave very specific instructions to keep him calm, quiet and not stress him out, because his incision was only glued & he would be in pain.
My family had taken in stray cats before & we had dealt with plenty of cats post-sterilization, so of course we knew what we were doing, right?
We took him home, introduced him to our two elderly (and not welcoming) cats & let him have roam of the house. Three days after we took him in, I woke up to my mom yelling at him & frantically calling for me to come out to the living room, because he was freaking out & had attacked her. I made it to the scene & he instantly pounced on me, tearing up my knee.
Much blood was shed. I went to the ER for antibiotics, Mom ended up sick with Cat Scratch disease, and the cat went back to live with my friend (the only human he actually ended up liking). To this day we both still carry the scars.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
Poor kitty. Animals can't understand what's happening to them in logical terms; all kitty knew is that he was in pain, he was trapped inside a building (that's how it seemed to him, since he'd been outdoors prior), and there were two hostile cats residing in the inescapable building.
Regina Holt 10 months ago
The poor cat should have been quarantined in one room of the house. For his safety and for the safety of the other cats (and it turns out humans also).
Upstaged75 9 months ago
My two 6 month old kittens just got spayed. Trying to keep them from jumping and going crazy post-surgery has been agonizing. They now both have seromas and are on antibiotics. (Not really a huge deal - it happens a lot with kittens) Short of hog-tying them and locking them in cages it's impossible to get them to take it easy. They did good the 1st few days but now they're completely nuts. The neighbors probably think I'm awful since I've been constantly screaming "no!" stop that!" "get down!" at them. I can't wait until this is over. It's been a week and I'm grouchy and sleep deprived. :)
Upstaged75 9 months ago
LOL, right after I posted this I just had to yell at them again.
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#46
When I was kid in the 80s - around 10 or 11 - I wasn’t exactly the coolest looking. I had glasses and braces and straight, goofy looking hair. I loved sports though, and I was really good at baseball. Needless to say, looking the way I did, I took a lot of s**t.
One day, these two guys - Mike and Mike - invited me to play catch. I thought I was pretty cool because one of them was the principal’s son and a ‘popular’ kid. Other Mike was like hype man - popular by association more or less. So I rode my bike up to the field and we eventually started playing pickle. They started acting s****y when I continued to get them out as runners. When I eventually queued up to be the runner, it started to get mean. I’d run and instead just tagging me, they’d smack me with their gloves or push me down when I was coming up on the base. The bases were big rocks, and at one point they pushed me down on one of them. I started to get angry and was crying a little bit because it really hurt one of my legs when I fell from the push. I told them that they should stop, and that the next time they did that I’d get really mad or something really lame because, again, I wasn’t exactly a tough guy. They thought it was pretty funny. I probably would have laughed at me too.
Sure enough, I queued up to run and principal’s son pushed me down, and I landed on the rock again. Something just snapped.
In addition to baseball, I’d also been taking Tae Kwon Do and had just recently participated in a couple of tournaments. I had that fresh in mind as I got up and proceeded to punch principal’s kid in the stomach. I remember he made this breathless groaning sound as he doubled over. I kind of froze because I remember being just as surprised as he was that I’d done that. It was long enough for him to recover and he started to come forward to try to tackle me - at which point I backed up and kicked him in the face. Hard. His head snapped back and he just dropped to the ground, yelling and crying. I turned around and saw hype man standing there with a surprised look on his face. Principal’s son was screaming for him to throw my bike in the street or something idiotic like that, at which point hype man ran over to our bikes - but instead of doing that, he got on his bike and rode away.
I got scared because I thought I was going to get in serious trouble from his dad (the principal) and my parents. I remember running over to my bike and riding home as quickly as I could. I was really upset as I told my parents what happened. My mom just hugged me and I remember my dad just kind of smiling, not saying anything.
The next day I went to school and nothing happened. The principal said hi to me as usual. Maybe I’m misremembering, but I’d also swear he gave me a look like, ‘Good job.’ He knew I constantly took s**t.
I ran into principal’s son Mike, who had a pretty nasty black eye. As I walked up, I overheard him telling his friends he kicked my a*s. I didn’t say anything for obvious reasons.
But from then on, he actually became my friend. Hype man Mike never said anything. And because he was friendly to me, other guys who’d previously been mean at least stopped to a tolerable degree.
Joshua David 9 months ago
I was a kid back then so I lived vicariously through this story. Thanks for the memories!
#47
As a kid, I really loved Fraggle Rock. I knew they lived in the walls and also understood putting a key into a door could open it.
I didn't find any Fraggle, but I did get electrocuted.
#48
I drunkenly accepted line after line of speed all night long without any idea of what it actually is/does. Was awake for five days before I could finally sleep for two hours and then I was still wide awake for two more days. Had to go to a psychologist because I thought maybe I was in a psychosis. I am glad I did not die from sleep deprivation. But I am also kiiind of glad that it happened. It inspired what would be the beginning of my healing process when I many years later went into severe depression.
#49
I was living in a rental house and was raking and cleaning up the backyard. There was a lot of pine straw. I raked it up into a decent sized pile and decided to burn it. Being "all about safety," I had a PAIL of water close by in case it "got out of hand."
I lit the pile and had no idea just how flammable pine straw and pine cones really are. A flame immediately shot REALLY high. I freaked and threw the water from the bucket. It did very little. I panicked, ran to the house, fought with connecting and dragging a water hose and made it back to the pile in probably a minute or 2. Fortunately I did not catch trees or neighbor's yards or houses on fire. Scared the hell out of me!
Jorge Gonzalez 9 months ago
The videos some fire departments put on the dangers of Christmas trees are scary
Load More Replies... #50
Ten years old, just moved to Minnesota from a climate that never saw ice and snow. Was waiting for my school bus one morning and thought the bus sign looked so cute and fuzzy with ice. Went to lick it, had to tear a good portion of the skin off my tongue to get it off. Then had a weird lisp all day at school.
Daniel Atkins 10 months ago
I did that too as a kid only with an aluminum ladder and at the time i hadn't seen "A Christmas Story".
Regina Holt 10 months ago
So I guess you never watched the movie "A Christmas Story" with Peter Billingsley.
Michael Largey 9 months ago
Also be careful with that Red Ryder BB gun. You'll shoot your eye out with it!
Boo 9 months ago
Yep, mine was the metal bar in the freezer. Was curious what would happen....panicked and pulled my tongue off, thankful no one was home to see that.
Load More Replies... #51
I ate an entire canned ham in one sitting. I am fairly certain we all know how that turned out.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
If the stock photo above is any indication of the canned ham that OP ate - holy bajeezus. 620mg sodium in a 2oz serving. Ham itself is net weight 16oz. That's 4,960mg of sodium. If 620mg is 26% of your daily value (as per the label above), that means that eating that entire tin is 208% of your daily value of sodium XD
KrazyChiMama 10 months ago
You’re fingers and toes look like sausages and you’re more thirsty than you’ve ever been in your life is my guess lol :)
#52
At 4 years old my dad wouldn't let me watch my Roadrunner video for the thousandth time that day. I said I'd run away. I actually got a long painting stick, wrapped a blanket around it and put some food and a doll in it. Then I tried to take the actual video player but it was too heavy. Lastly I put my stick over my shoulder D**k Whittington style and left the house. I got to the end of the road (7 houses) before I got scared and returned.
Joshua David 9 months ago
I have a story that is near identical, less the video player. Mine was because my mom didn't let me go to Jamie's house to play dolls. She had the best ones!
Sam Trudeau 9 months ago
Censor filters just don't work sometimes. Wittington's first name is not the curse word.
#53
Went on a hike with my family as a kid. I found an old metal bar and was hitting random things with it. When we got back to the car, lo and behold I find an old wd40 can. My old man was very specific about me not hitting it with the bar. Well, I did.
The explosion was immediate and intense and I was covered in old wd40. I ended up riding home in the truck bed.
Jenn Smith 10 months ago
Here, we have a saying. If it moves, and it shouldn't you need duct tape. If it won't move, but it should, then you need WD-40.
Load More Replies... #54
My ex husband is abusive. He thought he had devalued and abused me so much that I would beg him to stay after he confessed to having an affair. But I realised he had somewhere to go and told him we were done. He said that he didn’t have anywhere to go and I told him that he should move in with his mistress. She set me and my children free. I will always be grateful. He was very angry at me. He literally f****d around most of our marriage and found out. Also we had to go to court for the divorce and it was on the letter that because it was domestic abuse he wasn’t allowed to talk to me. He’d have been mortified that people knew and the law was telling him what to do with his ‘property’, me.
#55
Tried to skip a small step on a ladder and ended up falling off, breaking my wrist. Now I double-check every ladder before I even think about climbing.
Geoffrey Scott 10 months ago
What I hate? Thinking you are at the bottom step aaaand, NOPE! One more to go.
Deta Rossiter 10 months ago
i have this problem with my stairs at night, and then your back does funny spams for the next few days
Load More Replies... LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
Even small/short ladders can be incredibly dangerous. And yeah, people have sometimes survived falls from greater heights (15-20 feet) without serious injury, but negligence with ladder use - regardless of its height - isn't worth the risk. My dad went up an unsecured, poorly-placed ladder wearing flip-flops, fell ~10 feet to the concrete, and sustained a traumatic brain injury. He never recovered and ended up bedridden, wearing diapers and having to be fed liquid nutrition through a feeding tube for two decades until he died of pneumonia/staph in both lungs (humans aren't meant to lay horizontal for the majority of their days, and it makes us susceptible to lung fúckery. We used to sit him up as much as possible, but he had massive muscle atrophy and his catastrophic brain damage meant that he no longer "remembered" how to sit upright, so he would flop over unless he was strapped into the chair.) tl;dr HAVE A SPOTTER/have someone hold/secure your ladder if you can.
#56
My father told me not to cut towards myself with a pocket knife. I said that I was fine. I got 4 stitches in my hand that day.
Charles McChristy 10 months ago
Same, but I didn't get stitches. I was around 7 and still have the scar on my thumb. Cut all the way to the bone.
#57
Challenged a friend to play “Gladiators” on the monkey bars at school when I was 10 - the one where you hang from the bars and wrap your legs around the other person to pull them off… well I took a foot to the crotch and needed “inside” stitches (I’m female). I still think I could’ve taken you, Ashley, you dirty fighter!
#58
Petting a random stray cat and thinking everything was going to go well.
Upstaged75 9 months ago
I tried to rescue a stray and her kitten one time. She clawed the ever loving f**k out of my leg and they both ran off.
#59
When I first moved to my place out in the boonies I was warned repeatedly that my neighbors were unhinged lunatics. Much like Britta Perry, I thought "Pfff, I lived in New York, I was around lunatics all the time." I thought having good relationships with the neighbors out here was very important in case of an emergency, so I stubbornly went over with a pecan pie from Publix like I've seen people do on the movies and I saw the (I assume?) wife was out front watering a flowerbed. I literally just said "hi" and she turned the hose on me and soaked me head to toe, laughed and told me to get off her driveway. The husband would've probably shot me.
Thankfully they moved out last year, and not to go there but the massive "Let's Go Brandon!" flag pole was a literal red flag I ignored. Never again.
Tropical Tarot 10 months ago
Yeah we have one of those across the street from my mom. Unfortunately I am related to them.
Mike F 9 months ago (edited)
They are next door and across the street from me.
Load More Replies... #60
When I was about 17-18, I met a guy online on a little chatroom/forum type website called Gaia online. I actually ran an art shop on it and sold art, that's how I ended up getting to know him. Our conversations were fun but I had no intentions of it going anywhere other than flirting. He had other ideas- he was really manipulative and loved to gaslight but I grew up with a manipulative mother so I knew how to defend against it once I spotted it- when he had had enough of my "always being defensive and argumentative" he found my address and sent me spiked food and images of my house from google maps and told me he knew where I lived. I later learned that how he found out was through someone my sister was friends with whom she communicated regularly. He spun some story how we were trying to meet but wanted to surprise me early so the 'friend' gave him my address.
I was so embarrassed and I didn't know how to tell my mom or sister- I knew better yet I did it anyway.
This guy got me banned from Gaia online by trading me items and then reporting me, saying I scammed him. I ceased all contact and removed myself from anything he knew I was involved in but I was sure I had been careful about not revealing anything personal. I also played Guild Wars 2 back in the day and I got a message from a random player, turns out it was him. He acted nonchalant and I was absolutely mortified to the point that I stopped eating. He learned of the games I played from that same "Friend" that my sister hung out with and purchased the ones needed to track me down and found out my player name from that friend. When I confronted the friend, they did not believe me and said I was acting like "an extreme feminist." This guy also tried to get me banned from GW2 but I had contacted a dev, showed them everything from our past conversations and texts even unrelated to guild wars to prove I was being stalked- The guy was banned shortly after and I told the "Friend" I'd be contacting the police if they gave any more information about me or my sister. My sister cut contact after I told her what was going on. Eventually, the ex-friend contacted me through GW2 saying that I was right all along, that this stalker did it to other girls too and he manipulated their friends into giving them information so he could follow them. Apparently it had gotten way worse with the girl after me. I told him to go talk a long walk off of a short pier and never contact me or my sister again.
I didn't tell my mom until after I moved out because the incident with the food was brought up.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
The internet was a weird place in the early days. When I was allowed to make my first AOL screen name (back in the days of antiquity - i.e. 1992), I was 10 years old and my dad told me I was not allowed to use my real name/address/info in the screen name (nor was I allowed to put that info on my profile or tell anyone in IMs/email/chat my info.) I asked if my initials were okay if it was just a part of the screen name - he said fine - so my first screen name was CCLakota XD (Yep, I've been "Lakota" online for over 30 years!) I ended up making a friend on AOL whose screen name was Mech73 - I didn't know until MUCH later that the "73" was his birth year, so he was almost a decade older than I was. He wasn't creepy, fortunately, but the places I hung out (Red Dragon Inn and Stars End Bar RPing chatrooms) could sometimes get pretty adult-themed. My dad trusted me to be smart, and I never encountered weirdos like OP did, but the internet was the Wild West back then for sure XD
#61
When I was 8 my parents wouldn’t let me have a bike. Borrowed my friend’s bike, fell off and fractured my skull. 💀.
#62
Didn't do well in school. Pushing 30 and have only worked dead end minimum wage jobs.
Honey 10 months ago
I don't think that's FAFO. I didn't exceed in school either, didn't go to college but have a government job. The opportunity is always there, somewhere.
Regina Holt 10 months ago
Well, if you are in 'murica right now, I hope your government job does not fall under the chainsaw of Elon Mush.
Load More Replies...
whiterabbit 10 months ago
Sounds like you're still f*cking around. I didn't do well in highschool at all, I got a 0.4 gpa my freshman year, barely did better than that the rest of highschool. Went on to work my way through a BS in biology and a good career.
Curious Panda 9 months ago
OP, it's never too late to learn a new skill. Maybe take one of those certifications skilled workers get so you can maybe get a new, better paid job? Much luck to you!
#63
Decided I was tough enough to buy a house in a sketchy neighborhood and fix it up myself. The housing market tanked the next year and the neighborhood went to hell. Oh, the crimes I saw! That time I was gardening in the front yard and a drunk man in a church suit took a knife out and threatened to stab my dog? Tip of the iceburg. I found tf out.
#64
I had a laptop and the keyboard was shorting out. It would randomly stop working and you had to push down on it and it would start working again for a little while. One day I couldn’t get more than a few key strokes before needing to push on it again so I started pushing harder and harder in my frustration. Eventually it culminated in me punching the keyboard only to watch the laptop turn off and refuse to turn back on. When I took it apart to see what was wrong I found I punched it hard enough to push thru the keyboard, the plastic frame below, and cracked the motherboard killing the laptop. Oops.
#65
Ate expired yogurt, spent the night on the toilet.
Regina Holt 10 months ago
I've often wondered how much wiggle room there is with being past the expiration date. I think I will continue to only risk it by 3 days. TIL
#66
When I was a kid I tested out if you use the electric car window opener / closer. I wondered how strong the motor was if I put my hand above the open window and then hit the electric “close window button”
Severely hurt my hand. Turns out the motors are strong.
#67
I wanted to go out and play in the garden, but wasn’t allowed. I was being a brat and took my scooter and started driving around the house. Fast forward, I was driving on the carpet, someone moved the table that was on top of it and a small hill was created which I stumbled over. The scooter crashed on my arm, I also fell with my entire weight on it and some of the things on the table fell on me too. I broke my entire arm.
#68
Was about 15 years old and loved fires n stuff… Abandoned dirt bike in my communal back yard, no petrol but I still threw a match in the tank. No hair or eyebrows for about a month!
Lucky that was all that happened as the fire flew back up through the cap of the tank.
Upstaged75 9 months ago
I threw a match on a bunch of blasting caps as a kid. Still have tinnitus.
#69
Not so much mine but my mom's
My mom cheated on her husband and I was born
I'm literally the consequences of her actions made flesh.
#70
I did my own taxes one year. Nuff said.😂.
Billo66 10 months ago
When I have mine done I always owe. If I do them myself I get a 10k return. I don't get it.
Peter Bear 9 months ago
IRS: We know exactly how much tax you owe, and how much you already paid. No, we aren't going to tell you; you have to tell us. And if you're wrong, you go to federal prison.
Load More Replies... What do you think ?
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
My mother is the textbook definition of "toxic narcissist" and is also extremely abusive. She abused me (in every way you can abuse a child) during my entire childhood. As a child, I would just "grey rock" whenever she was on an abusive rampage (we didn't have that phrase back then, but that's what I did.) But when I hit my teenage years, I started feeling my oats (and I was also taller than my mom by then) so I stopped wanting to eat endless miles of her sh!t. One day, she was in the kitchen preparing a roast, and I talked back to her when she yelled at me for wearing jeans (instead of a dress.) Turns out that being taller than someone doesn't mean you're stronger than they are. I ended up with the tip of a kitchen knife embedded a half-inch in my bicep. Obviously she was totally the only wrong one in the situation, but I still should have just kept my mouth shut. I knew better than to smart off to her.
KrazyChiMama 10 months ago
Mine was while I was still in my early 20’s…I was in a hurry and instead of walking around a snow embankment I decided to leap over it like a gazelle. I was graceful until I landed on the other side which was fill of ice..I twisted my ankle and fell hard on my butt…it took 6 long weeks for my ankle tendons to heal and the swelling to finally go down. I definitely FAFO!!! :D
Parmeisan 9 months ago
Oh, I have a similar one! I grew up in a very flat location. No mountains, very few notable hills or valleys. The idea that a parking lot might be anything but 100% flat is *wild* to me. But I was in the Canadian maritimes for a visit and that place is very much NOT flat. I was leaving a restaurant at night (ie, it was quite dark) & going with a different group than I'd arrived with, when I realized I'd left something in the first car - which was driving away. I tried to flag them down, chased them a little, saw a row of parking bumpers, and did a little jump as I ran, just enough air-time to get over them. Well, it was a 3-foot drop on the other side. At least the worst I got was some very bloody knees and elbows. But the best part is that I was carrying a bunch of helium balloons when I did this, so my friends watching saw my silhouette disappear and the balloons descend to ground-height. Then after a few seconds the balloons lifted a few inches while I meekly let out, "I'm ok!"
Load More Replies... Mrs.C 10 months ago
I went bridge jumping with some buddies in college. The railroad trestle was about 40 feet above the river. It was early April and the spring thaw made the water about 45 degrees. I wasn't the first to jump, but the moment my feet left the trestle, I knew it was a HUGE mistake. My knee bent about half way through my fall and I ended up with a welt about a half an inch out, the entire length and width of the back of my thigh. I was still bruised 6 weeks later when my mom came to pack me up at the end of term. It's actually a wonder I didn't go into shock and drown.
Granfaloon 9 months ago
Friend voted for Trump. Friend has federal job and illegal immigrant mother. Guess what happened to both of those things.
Ralph Vanloton 9 months ago
A severe ice storm left the neighbor's concrete driveway coated with about 2 inches of ice. They decided the best way to deal with the ice would be to pulverize it with sledge hammers; they completely c*****d every bit of the concrete and had to have it replaced.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
My mother is the textbook definition of "toxic narcissist" and is also extremely abusive. She abused me (in every way you can abuse a child) during my entire childhood. As a child, I would just "grey rock" whenever she was on an abusive rampage (we didn't have that phrase back then, but that's what I did.) But when I hit my teenage years, I started feeling my oats (and I was also taller than my mom by then) so I stopped wanting to eat endless miles of her sh!t. One day, she was in the kitchen preparing a roast, and I talked back to her when she yelled at me for wearing jeans (instead of a dress.) Turns out that being taller than someone doesn't mean you're stronger than they are. I ended up with the tip of a kitchen knife embedded a half-inch in my bicep. Obviously she was totally the only wrong one in the situation, but I still should have just kept my mouth shut. I knew better than to smart off to her.
KrazyChiMama 10 months ago
Mine was while I was still in my early 20’s…I was in a hurry and instead of walking around a snow embankment I decided to leap over it like a gazelle. I was graceful until I landed on the other side which was fill of ice..I twisted my ankle and fell hard on my butt…it took 6 long weeks for my ankle tendons to heal and the swelling to finally go down. I definitely FAFO!!! :D
Parmeisan 9 months ago
Oh, I have a similar one! I grew up in a very flat location. No mountains, very few notable hills or valleys. The idea that a parking lot might be anything but 100% flat is *wild* to me. But I was in the Canadian maritimes for a visit and that place is very much NOT flat. I was leaving a restaurant at night (ie, it was quite dark) & going with a different group than I'd arrived with, when I realized I'd left something in the first car - which was driving away. I tried to flag them down, chased them a little, saw a row of parking bumpers, and did a little jump as I ran, just enough air-time to get over them. Well, it was a 3-foot drop on the other side. At least the worst I got was some very bloody knees and elbows. But the best part is that I was carrying a bunch of helium balloons when I did this, so my friends watching saw my silhouette disappear and the balloons descend to ground-height. Then after a few seconds the balloons lifted a few inches while I meekly let out, "I'm ok!"
Load More Replies... Mrs.C 10 months ago
I went bridge jumping with some buddies in college. The railroad trestle was about 40 feet above the river. It was early April and the spring thaw made the water about 45 degrees. I wasn't the first to jump, but the moment my feet left the trestle, I knew it was a HUGE mistake. My knee bent about half way through my fall and I ended up with a welt about a half an inch out, the entire length and width of the back of my thigh. I was still bruised 6 weeks later when my mom came to pack me up at the end of term. It's actually a wonder I didn't go into shock and drown.
Granfaloon 9 months ago
Friend voted for Trump. Friend has federal job and illegal immigrant mother. Guess what happened to both of those things.
Ralph Vanloton 9 months ago
A severe ice storm left the neighbor's concrete driveway coated with about 2 inches of ice. They decided the best way to deal with the ice would be to pulverize it with sledge hammers; they completely c*****d every bit of the concrete and had to have it replaced.
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