30 In-Laws Share The Exact Moment They Understood That Their Relative’s Marriage Wouldn’t Last
In this day and age, we are obsessed with red flags. For good reason, avoiding something horrible before it affects us tends to be a win-win situation. Unfortunately for the vast majority of the population, oftentimes, truly important red flags are only visible to those outside of the situation.
Someone asked, “In-Laws of Reddit: When did you realize your kid's marriage was doomed?” and folks from across the internet shared some of the worst things they have seen. So get comfortable, prepare to roll your eyes as you scroll through, and be sure to upvote your favorite stories.
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Probably when he punched my daughter square in the face in front of our entire extended family.
Was the sister-in-law. The first time she and I went somewhere together she said, "Your brother's kind of been pissing me off lately. Do you think I should cheat on him again?" To which I asked if he knew about the others and she informed me he did not. I told her, "He will now." They divorced shortly after.
Yeah sorry, she wanted him to know. Not even sure it was subconsciously.
Sister-in-law here. I'd say it was when he pushed my sister into a thornbush over a petty argument the day after they got married.
A few months back my sister married a super nice guy. They hadn't been dating that long, like right under a year. They were super happy and looked like a perfect marriage. So the perfect happy couple got married and literally 4 days after being legally married sis calls me crying an screaming that newly wed husband is attacking her. As the heroic little brother I rush over to her place as fast as I can burst inside to see him and her having a stand off in the living room he's bleeding holding a knife and she's screaming bloody murder so I think my sister is about to be stabbed to death so I grab the .38 off my hip yell at him to drop the knife, he spins around I blast a round into his left thigh he's screaming blood everywhere I call 911. Police, paramedics, EVERYONE shows up.
Turns out that my sister and him had a dispute about her 'guy friend' at work she's always texting. Sister gets mad stabs husband with knife husband somehow wrestles knife away from my lunatic sister tries to calm the situation and I bust in the door and shoot the poor bastard. Great guy didn't press charges we got it settled all nice like I paid his medical bills and they divorced, I gained a new best friend with a bullet scar and I don't really talk to my sister.
The moment someone told me they were having a child to save their marriage.
When I met my sister's now husband then boyfriend, he was dragging her by her hair to the car because she left the house without telling him and he thought she was with a guy. She was having lunch with me. The second time I met him they had an argument at my parents' house in my room while I was in it. He kicked me out and shut the door, I had my ear on the door and I heard muffled noise, then loud gasping. I was banging on the door shouting and begging him to let me in. Turns out he was pushing my pillow on her face. I made the mistake of moving in with them to help my sister with the baby because yes they thought having a baby was a good idea. They had an argument and he lifted her up like something out of WWE and let her drop to the floor. I called the cops, she told them whoever called was a liar. They took him in anyway, she bailed him out because she missed him.
When the actual father of their youngest child came forward to demand a paternity test... he won.
DNA test on older child also showed no genetic match. No surprises here.
When she was kissing another guy in one of the wedding photos.
It didn't go over well.
When my sister told me he tearfully confessed to her on their wedding night that he had murdered and buried someone in the desert. After she urged him to turn himself in, he told her he was only joking.
At my wife's sister's wedding myself, my wife and my mother in law had a betting pool with the groom's two brothers on how long the marriage would last. Lowest guess was 13 months by my mother-in-law. Lasted 10. They started marriage counseling while engaged. The honeymoon involved separate vacations. Thank Christ there were no kids. Her second marriage was even worse.
When she tried to tell us that cooking m*th in a self-made underground complex beneath his shed in the backyard made him a "self-starting entrepreneur." And this guy was not Walter White, genius chemist from New Mexico. This was Ricky from Alabama who got his GED at 24.
Sister here. Thankfully this marriage never happened; the relationship ended shortly after the proposal, but I knew my brother's fiancee was a gold digger within an hour of first talking to her. My brother makes a ton of money, and I'm pretty sure that she latched onto him because she wanted him to pay her credit card and student loan debts. There were so many red flags, I'm kinda shocked that my brother managed to ignore them all. When I asked her what she liked about my brother, she said, "Uhhhhhh.... well, he has a really high paying job and he's good at fixing things, so he's pretty useful, hahaha!!" She also kept talking about how she was taking time off from medical school, and it became really obvious to me that she was trying to use the marriage as a way to drop out of medical school completely and live off of my brother's money. She also spent the entire time talking about designer bags and dresses, and how she'd been taking out loans to buy herself thousands of dollars' worth of bags. I hung out with her for a few hours, and by the end of it, I was 100% sure she didn't like him as a person at all. I ended up telling my mom, who told my brother, and he confronted her and she admitted to all of it and they broke up.
Edit: Some people are commenting saying that they wish that they were close to their siblings, so I just want to clarify: I'm not close to my brother. We've never been close. But he *is* my brother, so I've got his back. So don't be sad if you're not close to your siblings. They will probably have your back when the time comes no matter what.
So I know a couple, ex couple, who were together for years! they were open so yeah, but one fell in love with someone else and they broke up. right thing to do? well it then turns out the one that left had been getting very comfortable with the lifestyle the rich boyfriend could pay for, when they broke up the rich boyfriend agreed to pay off $60K of credit card debt!!
When he brought his wife and his girlfriend to Thanksgiving brunch.
Before she ever got married, when she told us she was going to help him get over his substance abuse problem.
When they decided to get married when he was in boot camp.... Through mail. They married the week he got out. And divorced 4 months later...
Sister-in-law here.
I was 7 years old when my sister's new boyfriend walked into our house, took one look at the fish tank and asked, "how do they breathe?" He was at least 20 years old at the time.
They stayed together 8 years, 2 of those married, before divorcing. He's a meth addict, and my sister is remarried with a beautiful family now.
I was the brother in law.
She would call me all the time when I lived in Maryland to complain about my brother. When I lost my job and moved back home she was constantly pulling me aside to have small conversations.
When we went out one time she sat down next to me and asked me "Which guy in the bar I would be okay with her cheating on my brother with?"
When he caught her [sleeping with] a coworker.... on their anniversary.
When he refused to go somewhere with her because it was outdoors and he doesn't walk on grass or dirt.
I don't get this one. So he didn't want to go, and...? Go without him. Just because you are a couple, doesn't mean you should go everywhere together. It's not like he was throwing a fit about her going alone.
When he told me she didn't like gynecologists or birth control because they caused cancer, but it's fine because she was pregnant anyway. Flabbergasted, I asked why? And he said her mom wants grandkids.
Jesus I can't wait till he wakes up.
SIL here. Late to the game so this will be buried deeeeeeep.
On their wedding day when my sister was walking down the aisle he was looking everywhere but at her. He looked bored and uninterested.
Then the final nail (for me) was when he tried to convince another of our sisters to fool around with him. She was estranged with oldest sister and knew if she told her older sister would just blame her or claim she was making it up to cause drama.
The marriage officially ended after he got a vasectomy behind her back bc he got his mistress pregnant and she found out. His other kid is the same age as their middle child.
The saddest part is he had adopted her oldest kid, so now my niece has had 2 dads wash their hands of her. Her bio wanted nothing to do with her, and her adoptive one is a s**t parent who acts like it's a burden to take care of his kids.
Sister-in-law here. Realized it when my sister got a stalker and her husband did nothing but make fun of her despite how terrified she was. I think she's going to wait until their kid is 18 to divorce him.
Ah I thought they'd never make it down the aisle but sadly they did. Some things that tipped me off:
- He wouldn't have sex with her for two years for reasons that are totally-not-related-to-the-fact that-he's-attracted-to-men-instead.
- He treats women like s**t, including his fiancee.
- It's his way or the highway ALL THE TIME. Like "either we stay at this hotel or we break up."
- He put them into debt equal to about 2 years of their COMBINED salaries.
- He bought stuff for himself all the time but wouldn't buy her a wedding ring.
- He had very specific ideas of what the wedding should look like and wouldn't let her have any input.
And yet I was considered an negative Nancy for thinking they wouldn't work out.
I knew the minute I met my daughter's new boyfriend that he was a risk for her. One year and 1 grand-daughter in her marriage and he started to hit her. So I got involved. I offered him $20,000 to disappear and he didn't take it claiming he would get help and get better and my daughter pleaded for him also. Then he did change. He was way too nice even. One morning my daughter called me crying her hearth out saying that he had ran away with their daughter. 3 years passed but since I had friends working in the police department that were looking into it. We found out that he was living with his sister about 4 hours away. So, we had him arrested and my grand-child was reunited with my daughter. What we didn't expect was that he filled her mind with so much horror story about her mother that we could not send him to prison. But he wore a ankle bracelet for a long time and after he had to let the police, and us, know whenever he was even going more then a few yards from where he lived. Now that my grand-daughter knows better. She's in her early 20's and lives by herself. Shortly after she moved out, I met my son-in-law "by accident" and to this day he carefully watches himself before crossing any street in case he might get run over :) I'm not saying I would do it but accidents do happen. And I do believe in sweet sweet Karma !!!
Wait, why would filling her head with lies about her mother mean they now can’t send him to prison? But it does mean an ankle bracelet?
Not me but a co-worker knew that her daughter's relationship (turned marriage then domestic abuse now divorce) would end badly when the first time she saw the place they were living together he showed off their bed as quote "This is the place where I plow your daughter" only to be reenforced at a party later where he told a group of strangers with the mom present "If she could swallow then I wouldnt have to mess up her make up every night". It was 'a joke' off of something about the daughter coughing. Who the f**k says that s**t in front of your SO's parent?
His wife butt-dialed me at 3 a.m. and I got to listen to ten minutes of her sweet-talking a guy with a the TV on in the background. I said nothing to either of them about it at the time.
It was Christmastime and my sister and her husband were buying gifts at a mall. They stopped at a little cart selling spiced nuts. They bought some. They also each got to have a sample one. She was holding both his and hers and he asked her to hold some stuff for him and to free up her hand, without really thinking, she ate his sample nut. Even though they had just bought a package of them, he lost his f*****g mind about it and wouldn't speak to her for the rest of the day because she ate his sample. His anger was always disproportionate like that. I knew it couldn't last much longer at that point.
When she decided to give most of the groom's male relatives very sensual and passionate lapdances during the after party.
My step-bro married a girl still in high school.... doomed before it started. It was in Mississippi. he was 24 she was a few months shy of 18. she was definitely not mature for her age.
We all knew the marriage would fail before they even said their vows because he strangled her one night during a fight, and he was a drunk, and an a*s.
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When my sister phoned my mum crying: that BIL had debt before their marriage, made even more during their marriage and emptied her saving account as well as their kids. My sister married him thinking to have the easy life as a SAHM with a hb who would work and pay her s**t. Turns out he used her aswell. Dated 1 year, married for 2, divorced and both in debt now
When my sister phoned my mum crying: that BIL had debt before their marriage, made even more during their marriage and emptied her saving account as well as their kids. My sister married him thinking to have the easy life as a SAHM with a hb who would work and pay her s**t. Turns out he used her aswell. Dated 1 year, married for 2, divorced and both in debt now
