40 Times People Got Dragged Back To Earth With The Help Of Hilariously Savage Comebacks
Have you ever found yourself in the midst of a heated argument, feeling like a deer caught in the headlights, desperately searching for a snappy reply? But here's the thing: that clever comeback doesn't always arrive when we need it most. Instead, it often sneaks up on us when we least expect it. We've all been there, haven't we? But today, let’s pay a tribute to the champions of banter.
Introducing the subreddit r/MurderedByWords, a treasure trove for “well-constructed put-downs, comebacks, and counter-arguments”. We’ve collected some of the most brilliant ways people have ended disagreements. So buckle up and get ready to dive into the art of winning an argument with style.
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Transphobic Aunt Called Out By An Actual Good Twitter User Vaush
My husband is a therapist to teens at risk of (deleting themselves) or SH...most of their problems stem from the struggle to be accepted in their families or peer groups. They struggle alone to accept something that's not a given about themselves. Then they finally find the strength to let the people in their life know their truth, and they're rejected. It's horrifically hurtful for anyone, let alone a child.
Load More Replies...to my fellow trans youth, i am sorry you sweet girl. i am so sorry that you didn’t have the acceptance you deserved.
Happy pride my trans and nonbinary pandas, if you need a mom to hug you or kick your butt, my wombs a hot mess but I have plenty of room in my heart. Make your bed, drink some water, and take a walk. I love you.
Omg! Such an awful woman!!! Vaush made a good point, she is writing this heartbraking news the day after her niece kills herself. And she writes in a disgusting self righteous way🤢🤮
Not to mention she misgenders her niece several times, using he/him pronouns when it CLEARLY says that her niece was transgender and used she/her pronouns
Load More Replies...Yeah. Family hate kills a lot of people. Hope you are pleased with your accomplishment.
Happy Pride, Pandas. I'm taking a page from MrsFettesVette. If you need an older sister friend or just a friend in general, please reach out to me. I may not understand what it's like to be trans, non binary or any gender that isn't cis, but I understand that it's difficult to be loved. You deserve love. Take your meds (if it applies). Drink water. Eat something. Know that people love you, care about you and think you're valid... Even if they're someone you don't know on Bored Panda. You have my love and support. I'm giving you a virtual hug and if you haven't been told today: you look amazing, you're 100% valid and I love you.
A Congratulations At Least
Not to mention people need time to relax. Yes you CAN spend 2 hours a day working on a skill and make noticeable improvements over time, but if those 2 hours are the only leisure hours you have you're just going to burn out.
But, but, but, while relaxing, you're not working! What about the HUSTLE?!? /s
Load More Replies...what's the r******s? can't even figure what could possibly be naughty about groceries unless it's made of 🍒🍆🍑🍌🍈🍈 or something. BP making posts into a crossword puzzle
The blocked out words are "regular-a**e" but the US version of a**e. Because BP doesn't know British words 🤣
Load More Replies...You need $10K or better to start a successful business, based on personal experience. Healthy food for a couple where I live is about $400 / month. Learn a new skill in 2 hours? I have learned many skills in 73 years and they all took way more than 2 hours. I wouldn't buy an iPhone for any price. For me and my wife, "dinner and drinks" is fast food - around $10-$15 You need professional help to get a grip on reality
I feel money is not enough to be successful with your business. I'm a software developer and I'm good at it; but I'd be miserable if I had to find my own clients. This is a different set of skills and strengths, I don't have it. I don't have a million-dollar idea for an app, either. And even with a great idea, you need investors, marketing, all that stuff I don't even know how and where to start.
Load More Replies...Thank you, English is not my first language and I couldn't guess it!
Load More Replies...Not everything in your life can be about making money or learning how to make more money. That isn't the point to living. If you have no life other than that, you might as well be dead.
So you took the opportunity to choose to write a pretentious, patronising list of unrealistic sums of money, well, I'm choosing to call your list bulls**** and you a weapons grade moron....
Why did I choose to be born into a middle class family? I coulda been rich, with no effort on my part!
They Didn't See This One Coming
Reading the bible didn't make me an atheist. It did make me a non believer in the Biblical g*d, but that doesn't mean some form(s) of higher power or god like entity/entities can't exist. Just means the bible one is bs. (thankfully, cause he's written as a genocidal maniac with a sadistic streak and a tendency to gaslighting).
Load More Replies...I mean, why do religious folk think we need to do anything to solidify our belief god isn't real? It's like saying we need to constantly find proof Santa isn't real. I don't believe in any of the gods of any religion, religious folk don't believe in all but one god - I only don't believe in one less than them, is that so hard to understand?
It's the religious folks' idea that everyone reasons the way they do. They believe in God because the bible tells them about him. Therefore, atheists don't believe in God because some other book told them he doesn't exist.
Load More Replies...Reading a book that started with incest and ended with evil entities on horseback. What's not to believe?
The fact that there are parts they don't take literally - like "Love thy neighbor" is a problem too.
Load More Replies...Read an article about new book banning rules and process in Utah. Right leaning lawmakers wanted to make it easier for parents to suggest and have books banned at school. One parent successfully requested the Bible being removed and provide 9 pages of evidence showing the Bible covering horrible topics for children. I love it when a plan comes together! Also saw that citizens are now planning to protest the Bible banning on religious grounds🤷🏼♂️
Yes but...I'm sure Utah has its own ulterior motives for that.
Load More Replies...2/10 book is kinda boring, but there's some juicy parts I guess
Or rather how terribly cruel the people who made Him up were.
Load More Replies...My favorite part is when a religious person starts quoting Leviticus because I'm gay, and I quote the other parts of Leviticus that they left out which they are also happening to break (shaving beards and wearing mixed fibers is a Levi no-no) and finish off with "I'll meet you in the stoning pit"
The subreddit r/MurderedByWords was created back in 2016 and it didn't take much time for it to attract a significant following. Currently, they have a whopping 2.8 million members who share and admire the art of clever comebacks.
"The way we see it, a murder should (but doesn't always have to) be more than a quick response or retort. The best murders are well-constructed, thought-out responses that leave the opening argument completely without any ability to reply. In other words, their point has been totally demolished. Now, obviously, there's more than one way to murder with words, and sometimes a quick rapier thrust or stab to the heart (a short, swift reply) can be just as deadly as a drawn-out murder, and you'll frequently see both types in this sub," the moderators of the subreddit have previously told Bored Panda.
Look Who Just Discovered Consent
I like to drink water but I wouldn't want to be waterboarded. I like to eat but I wouldn't want to be forcefully fed like a goose... Do you see where I'm going here?
Guys what are you doing :/ Lemme in on the joke.
Load More Replies...Objectifying a hot piece of T&A has nothing to do with consent I caneye f*#k you across the room all I want in front of a judge and your preacher in fact they would probably be thinking the same nasty a*s thoughts I am
M**dered By Tasty Words
"Can you really call yourself a man if you don't live a constant state of terror that someone of no significance disagrees with your choice of drink?"
You should get enough fruit in your diet too, cause scurvy isn't sexy.... I might have stayed up too late to watch a series on the Magellan expedition last night 😅
The reason the British sailors used limes was because the British Empire had already pissed off every country that had lemons. Truth, I watch documentaries also. Better than this reality tv being the trend.
Load More Replies...As a young man, I always ordered double Whiskey sours, no ice to impress people. I was an insecure young man that wanted to look like he meant business. As a 35yr old man, I've got nothing to prove. I love a good lime Mojito. And it better come with a little umbrella that I can play with.
Gross. Sorry dude, I just hate mint; no judgment otherwise 😊 you enjoy whatever you like and don't let anyone try to give you shīt. And I agree, any tropical drink must have an umbrella
Load More Replies...What´s the deal anyway with fruity or flowery tastes/smells being girl stuff? I am a guy, but I sometimes buy womens shampoo when I like the smell: Peach or cherry for example.
Nah - men are supposed to smell like sawdust, cigar smoke, or liquor! If people don't think I roll around in sandalwood shavings every morning, I'm not manning right.
Load More Replies...Plus that fruity drink will get you completely trashed with less effort than a beer. Cost efficient!
And less hangover if you happen to overindulge. Beer hangovers SUCK!
Load More Replies...As man who drinks straight whiskey, followed by sparkling water, I've been called effeminate by guys who take it on the rocks, or straight up, no chaser! Like, my dude, I'm just trying to stay hydrated so I don't get a hangover. Also, I have nothing against fruity drinks, or anyone who drinks them. I enjoy them myself, but try to avoid them because the mixers have too much sugar.
Aussies Would Like To Have A Word
It worries me that there are actually a few people that believe America has some super special rights the rest of the world doesn't. Sure there are countries with significantly fewer rights, but most of the western world have very similar human rights.
But no one has as much freedom as the US of A. They're the most freedomest country in the world!
Load More Replies...A concept that many people in the US can't seem to grasp is that individual freedom (to own firearms) only extends so far that it does not impair the freedom of others (to move safely in public spaces). So if the general right to own guns (which I'm aware does not exist in all states) restricts the rights to be alive of too many, this right itself needs to be restricted (to people who proof to be responsible beings and know about operation and safety of a gun).
Upvote 1000 times. Your freedom ends where mine begins.
Load More Replies...It should be noted that with the 2012 school shooting in Australia the child took a Revolver, not a semi-automatic, to school NOT to kill people but to impress friends. The gun was fired once. The shooting had NO deaths and NO injuries.
I might get downvoted for this but, people are way too scared to fight or get beat up nowadays, everybody wants to pull a gun to their defense. I am not condoning violence at all but I would rather you guys fight it out then shoot it out, at least you get to live to fight another day. You pick up a gun to kill somebody and BOOM both of yall lives are over.
I do wonder about what kind of constant, paralyzing fear people must be living in if they feel like they need to carry a gun to go buy a coffee at Starbucks, pick up some snacks at Target, or get their teeth cleaned (I'm a dental hygienist in a blue state and some of my patients actually carry their guns into the dental office). Yet the "other side" are fragile...
Load More Replies...America is so fuckked up it has literally no idea how fuckked up it actually is. It is literally swirling down the drain right in front of us.
Australia has relevant rights. America has chaotic and stupid rights that the population does not have the maturity to exercise safely. Gun control is a prime example. No citizen needs a military weapon, bur that's what the Jay Dix's are all about.
I am australian and have been TOLD by many americans we dont have freedom and rights. Its ill informed. I can buy a gun. I have no right to expose others to harm so i cant carry it. I walk the streets and drive knowing i live somewhere safe.Best freedom in the world.
Hospital data shows serious stabbings are on the rise in Victoria as the state grapples with an emerging knife culture among teenagers and young adults. The state’s major trauma hospital, The Alfred, says the number of patients it treated with life-threatening stab wounds rose 50 per cent this summer compared to the previous year. And one of its top surgeons fears the severity of injuries is getting worse.
While ruthless put-downs might be entertaining online, things work differently when you argue with someone face-to-face. As tension rises and responses become quite personal, you might find yourself seeking common ground rather than tearing each other down.
Arguments can happen unexpectedly in various places: between partners, friends, family members, at work, or even with strangers you've just met. When emotions run high, it's not always easy to keep yourself from losing control. Nevertheless, the wise choice would be to exercise restraint and self-control in such situations.
Musk Fan Getting M**dered
He won't be able to color those books anyway, the crayon is stuck too far up his nose
I'm familiar with the second guy. He is a massive joke of a human being, don’t let this fool you.
He went ad hominem, in that last comment about the coloring books. He may claim accolades, but he demonstrated cruelty.
So, does anyone know the name/title of this author and/or his books?
Bet he sees far fewer now since they were recalled en masse. But we shouldn't judge too harshly, maybe elon was just missing their company.
Capitalism Is Love, Capitalism Is Life
I can’t believe this is real, as that’s 6 hours of walking a day, but apparently it was only for a few months after her car broke down, and a lot of the time her coworkers would give her a lift. Why didn’t they give her a lift every time, I don’t know!
sadly there are people who have to do it. there was this documentary on poverty in america i watched a while ago where a woman would get up at some absurdly early hour to walk to her job at Burger king. and the way her oldest son was so clearly ashamed of her (he was like 15, so how was he to understand the heruclean effort she was putting in for them?) was just heartbreaking as for the lift part some times people dont want others to realise how bad they have it, sometimes people don't want to have to consistently owe others, sometimes others don't care...is my guess
Load More Replies...She also looks 85, but let's applaud her hardships and frame it in a positive light... 🙄
Sounds like a story your grandparents tell you to get you to eat your vegetables.
Yes. And she looks like she's 80. Not 60. Hard life wearing her down.
One Hour Dry Burgers
Buying other peoples’ ideas & technology is smart, but speaks nothing of his intelligence or intellect
Load More Replies...Elon Musk is proof money doesn’t buy character, money reveals character.
I noticed recently that Elon tweets like ALL the time, Doesn't he have better things to do?
Mark my words: The world will soon find out what a farce Elon Musk really is. We really need to stop idolising these privileged and completely unnecessary people
Bro be complaining about people on Twitter ON TWITTER-
"Excuse me, Phil. My sandwich has more tomatoes then I wanted. Now push this is your washing machine, and wash that bloodstain off."
Clever put-downs or comebacks might end an argument for good. However, have you ever found yourself re-running the same fight with your partner or family member? It sounds too familiar, right? According to Linda Blair, a chartered clinical psychologist, you don’t have to go on like this. There are many ways to stop the endless quarrel.
Blair, in her insightful piece for The Guardian, suggests six techniques to consider to bring closure to a seemingly endless argument:
- The DIY approach - Let go of the things that bother you by realizing that the problem lies not in your partner's actions, but in how you react and get annoyed by them.
- The digging-under approach - If you want to figure out what your argument is really about, your job is to discover the underlying difference that is causing it.
- The ring-fencing game - You can have an argument at set times and for a set duration.
- The balancing act - Each partner chooses a behavior they find annoying in the other and suggests a positive alternative. Then, whenever the argument comes up, both partners agree to act in the positive manner instead of arguing.
- Fifty shades of grey - To approach your argument more calmly, agree to take a break whenever it starts. Wait for at least 20 minutes to let emotions settle down and clear your mind. Then, come together and each suggest five ways the other person could behave or react that wouldn't be upsetting. Keep talking until you find a compromise that works for both of you.
- The debating game - Both individuals should try to see things from their partner's perspective. Take turns arguing from the other person's side, spending about 10 minutes or until you feel you've explored all perspectives. Then share with your partner what you have learned from this exercise.
You can read more about it here.
Grandma's Taking No Prisoners
On A Post Discussing Those Creepy Children's Beauty Pageants In The Us And Diddling Kids
I would so leave my kid with a drag queen before I ever left her with a priest. Ewww.
Replacing one sacred caste who can't be criticised with another doesn't seem wise to me.
I see news articles on the local news quite frequently about teachers having inappropriate relationships with students that start over social media or text messages. I have yet to see an article about a drag queen abusing a kid. I’m sure you can dig and find one, but that’s my point- you have to dig. Don’t confuse drag with burlesque. It’s not the same thing.
I saw one hit a news site a few weeks back. I didn't search it out, it was just on one of the sites I view regularly. Assuming all people in a certain group are all good is just as unrealistic as viewing all people in a group as bad. I don't like posts like these that paint drag queens as saints that children should always trust. Because it's not true. There are always a small amount of bad people in any group. Teach your kids to treat them the same as they'd treat any other adult. Give them the same balance of trust/suspicion as any other adult.
Load More Replies...bro drag is easy to explain to kids grow up. some adults okay dress up and that’s okay and fun
Drag Queens are fabulous so take your bigotry and stick it where the sun don’t shine.
Not just history, parents will happily take their children to see the pantomime Cinderella, at Christmas and think what a great time they had. The ugly stepsisters are played by men but a drag queen reading a story is somehow inappropriate.
Load More Replies...So what is that same kid sees a play of someone in costume of Ancient Rome, when men wore "dresses"? That kid will scream about how they weren't real men? Or what about a Celtic festival with kilts? Or a judge in a robe? A priest in his getup? So stupid to blankety judge people, decisions and ways of living. If you don't want your kid who will obvi never understand there are lots of people out there different than him not to see it then don't f@cking go but you cannot and should not dictate for anyone else.
Cyanide Is Biologically Natural
Homosexuality is a fantastic way for nature to slow down population growth. Given how overpopulated some parts of the world has become I'd say we'd be better off as a species if more people were homosexual. Now if we can just get rid of b******t laws that make it hard for gays to adopt we could reduce the number of kids in the foster system too.
Just one example: gay sparrows look for abandoned nests and care for the chicks so they don't die. Many other species show similar habits. I say, taking care for abandoned younglings is as natural for gays as can be
Load More Replies...Same-sex relationships are a survival trait in species that mate in pairs. It gives a population a pool of non-breading surrogate parents to raise orphans.
Did you know that a lot of penguins have same sex relationships! Not only are homophobes hating on normal people for no reason but also adorable little icy tuxedo birds
Eyeglasses. Prosthetic limbs . Religions. Dentures. Menstrual pads. Orange mini carrots: some things which are not biologically natural.
My old (tom-) cats were gay af. My new ones are even gayer, the try to mount each other on a regular basis
True that. Homosexual relations have been documented in many species dating back million of years. One one degenerate species cares.
What are your thoughts about these comebacks? Share them in the comment section! For similar content, check out our previous articles by clicking here, here, here and here.
The Response To A Hateful Lady, Starts Out Pretty Strong, Loses Me A Bit In The Middle, And Then Ends With A Boom
"White people know how to act in public." Choked on that one. (Yes, I'm white) What is WRONG with people? I wonder if it ever occurred to or registered on any racist just how many people have the absolute right to hate them vehemently right back. A******s.
White people (and I am one) have committed more hateful crimes than any other.
Westboro is a church in Kansas run by a family of lawyers, whose main legal focus is the first amendment of the constitution. Focusing mainly on free speech they know what abhorrent things they can say and do and not get into trouble. Protesting outside military funerals with signs saying "God Hates F*gs" is just one example.
Louis Theroux did a couple of documentaries on these people. He just asks straightforward questions and let's their own words speak for themselves
Load More Replies...I love pulling this example when racist people try to pull the "well black people commit more violent crimes". Uh-huh, it's the white people shooting up schools and churches. How low do you have to be to shoot children and church goers? It's my race (white) that has sunk below the lowest of the low.
A relative of mine said it's whites' reaction to BLM demonstrations. 🙄 FFS.
Load More Replies...They don't. I've loved ICP since 98 and the one time I got to go to their concert (as they weren't allowed in Canada for years), it was a blast. Even though Shaggy's plane ride was delayed and we didn't start until 1 am, everyone was cool about it, we all had a great time and nothing got destroyed. They even say in their song that if people go out and commit violence because of their music then they don't understand what being a juggalo is about.
Load More Replies...You're A Figment Of Imagination
Stupid people are so annoying and painful to deal with. I’m glad someone still has the energy to clap back. I don’t.
Without Support From Mom And Dad
Another one who confuses Socialism with Communism. Oh dear. 🙄 "In brief, Communism backs full control of the Government across all standards of production and other resources. Socialism exercises adaptable forms of controlling the State."
and the current school of capitalism sees plutocrats owning everything, including the government...
Load More Replies...All those people hail capitalism... Until it comes to pay for work done for them. Then all of a sudden they're all: work should not be about money. Where is your team spirit and loyalty, nO oNe WaNtS tO WoRk AnYmOrE... Funny how capitalism is all great and fun until it's supposed to go both ways. Then, all of a sudden, they want free labour and people volunteering their time without extra pay and how dare you asking for a living wage. You are so materialistic! How you dare wanting part of consumerism! Here's the news baby: that's capitalism too! You pay for what you want! If you want workers, pay them! And pay them accordingly to your winnings and gains, because that's the capitalist way, it's all about money.
Typical conservative. Confusing thing. Socialism isn't Marxism. Marxism is a form of Communism. The Socialism I prefer is the Scandanavian style- like Norway and Sweden. I would gladly live there for 6 months.
Communism is in theory good. It's just idiots turning it into totalitarianism.
They're not idiots. They're shrewd players who are just as greedy and power-hungry as the honchos in a capitalist system. The only difference is the rhetoric used to manipulate. The idiots are the ones who don't see through the BS they spout to keep their positions at the helm.
Load More Replies...That is MY EXACT plan for Congress. Any time they pass a law they MUST live in the trenches first. Congressional members aren't required to have completed high school or equivalent so it's about damn time they are required to have SOME qualifications.
High school dropout Lauren "Honey Bo Bo" Boebert had to get her GED in order to be eligible to run. Heard it took her four tries. ;-)
Load More Replies...Me and my friend Dave were doing some yard work, (NW Montana), resetting pathway rocks and setting posts and etc. Our employer, a Floridian, came up to me and said, "In Florida I could get N.....s to do this work." So I walked over to my friend, on his hands and knees setting rocks, "Hey Dave, guess what..."
Been living on poor wages all my life. Never wish this on my worse enemy.
I would love for you clowns to go live in a socialist country for a year and see how much you like it.
$7.25 hr works if you don't have a credit card, trying to pay off a newer car and trying to get married at the same time. Priorities. Stay single, credit-free, and learn to fix your own regular car. Get your education from life and the library instead of going into debt for a dream. I'm self-educated and loving life without unnecessary appearances. Rent, don't buy. No kids, plenty of money.
It's Not The Piece Of Plastic
Hmmm... Not sure.. did you try shoving a battery up his a**e? For such a big one, I think you'll need a car battery..
Load More Replies...Tony: wants me to be an asthetically perfect mother, maid, and sexual servant. Piece of plastic: has no feelings, wants nothing from me, never writes misogynistic tweets whining about its unfulfilled sense of personal entitlement. It's a tough call, but... you're right, Tony. I'm gonna choose the piece of plastic over you.
Girls also don't need to worry about the piece of plastic forcing itself on her, lying about using condoms...
Because when I get myself off with the vibrator, it's all about me. And it does a great job. No offense to my husband, but sometimes I'm in the mood for me and only me. Why do guys get to jerk themselves off?
Why do some men, men who very likely see no issues with them touching themselves, have an issue with girls doing the same thing? How is it any different?
When Trying To Be An As**ole Misfires
I bet xexxe69 was seething that he couldn't get a rise out of her, she totally murdered his arguments.
I really admire this woman's response. Very effective not to escalate when in the right. 👏
Load More Replies...Clearly, Quran doesn't mind women getting well-educated and becoming super smart like her.
burning is also the way to dispose of buddhist texts or imagery, but try to burn the judeo-christian bible..
Some dopes think bibles combust when touched by liberals.
Load More Replies...HA HA HA BURN! And don’t call yourself anything with “svensk” (“Swedish”) in it, you rat bastard. That’s not who or what we are - feel free not to abuse our nationality while being a fυcking nazi. Disrespectful cυnt.
Well, about that . . . This was indeed done in Sweden, this year. https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2023/1/21/turkey-cancels-swedish-minister-visit-over-right-wing-protest
Load More Replies...Self-Made Success Story
I would like to introduce you to the little tiny letters at the bottom left of each picture. That's the source link, and it opens worlds of information. Apparently, on Reddit, they are not crossed out, and from there a quick Google search nets you articles like this one: https://www.thequint.com/lifestyle/art-and-culture/couple-trolled-for-tweet-about-having-bought-own-house-at-age-19#read-more
Load More Replies...Neither the truly rich, nor the truly poor like to talk about money. It's gauche AF. People that think they are...seem to want to talk about it all the time though.
2009, sitting at a birthday dinner with college friends (we radiated the year prior). We're all struggling bc we graduated into the recession and we basically trauma bonded over moving to a city to basically make ends meet and make the most of it, together. A couple joins us and the girlfriend announces "we bought a house!" We all take a beat. Friend blurts out "you're paying a mortgage now? Officially adults, cheers!" Girlfriend blinks and goes "a mortgage?...oh what is that?"
Dudes like “what’s a Wendy’s combo? My dad never bought me one of those.”
Your Personal Life Is Your Own, You Don't Owe Anyone An Answer
If I saw a gap I a resume I’d ask about it because you never know when they took that time to do something amazing that would help with the role you are looking to fill. A missing year? Did they travel? Learn a new skill? Become stronger in themselves? I once interviewed someone who didn’t put down education he did because it was not in my country, everything counts and makes you the person you are. The gaps count in all sorts of ways, some bad, some amazingly good.
Did you ever think the reason was very simple? They couldn't find a job.
Load More Replies...Listen, understand, then judge????? How about you miss the judge part out as it's not your place to do that.
I think they meant judge as in judging their ability to do the job and not the validity of the employment gap.
Load More Replies...Clearly a made up story. "Without a second thought the panel members decided to selection for the role. I said you're selected. Congratulations on your new role". - and this happened instantaneously right in front of the candidate, and I was the hero of the story.
Tell them you signed a non disclosure contract and cannot talk about that blank period.
As a recruiter, if I saw a gap on someone's resume I would always ask, "were you doing anything related to employment, education, or volunteering during this time?" Because that is literally the only thing that is relevant about the gap. Anything else is none of my business.
"oh those 18months? I was locked up in a Thai prison for accidently spitting gum on the ground. Guess how many ways I know how to make a shiv out of toilet paper?"
Can you explain this employment gap? ....,...."No, it's classified"....
OTOH, the interviewer and the team had the best possible reaction. Screw the legalists.
Remember When People Hid Their Bigotry?
It's Star Trek. A future dream were money doesn't exist anymore, anyone gets anything they need for free and people only work to enhance their lifes and make mankind better. It was Gene Roddenberry's dream of peaceful exploration and all people working together for a better world. It always was as liberal as you can get and the new shows ruined a lot of that dream already. Roddenberry would absolutely have made the show LGBTQ+ friendly and the shows had lots of scenes between same sex couples while he was still alive. First being in TNG, were a trill symbiont falls in love with Dr Crusher while having a male host and trying to continue the romance after the male host died and the new one was female.
And Roddenberry championed more than racial and social issues, remember, there was a Russian on the bridge as well. The original series aired in the 1960's, on the heels of the Berlin Airlift, Cuban Missile Crisis, and the idea of mutually assured destruction due to the escalating nuclear arms race. Ensign Chekhov was Roddenberry's hope for the future politically.
Load More Replies...Nichelle hugged me at a convention once. A beautiful woman in so many ways.
Load More Replies...I hope we were meant to sing that to the Star Trek tune, at least, I just did! 😁
Load More Replies...Hey. Stamets and Culber are the cutest tv couple I've seen in a long-freakin' time (and I'm not the mushy sort) - the pastor can kindly take his hate elsewhere.
Breed Some Friends
Sadness and confusion? Have you met my cats? They are a delight! And my niblings and godchildren are lovely too!
I don’t see an issue with being past my 40s and still being sexy and fun 😆
I'm almost 60 (dear gods when did that happen??) and have no issue with still being sexy & fun :-)
Load More Replies...And then their children get a job in another city and move out at age 20 only to call once a month and visit two days out of the year. One goal of parenting is to ensure your kids can survive in the world without you.
I'll be 60 next year. I never had kids. The sadness hasn't kicked in yet but I'll keep you posted.
😁. That's awesome! I think the idea of raising children has been sold (especially to women) for so long, that the idea of NOT having children seems incomprehensible to some. Nonsense!
Load More Replies...So being over 40 in a marriage is unsexy and boring? That isn't selling the idea to me
Mom approaching 40 here; I'll never be boring, unsexy, but this man sounds like he already is
Load More Replies...I have a kid and I adore her, but I also enjoy my solitude. Not all of us need constant attention and to be around people to feel important
Anyone who does needs to look to themselves. What do they need someone to validate them?
Load More Replies...I absolutely LOVE being a dad. Everything I do is with the aim to be a better father. But you better f*****g believe I am ready to have time to myself again when they move out.
Children are not the ONLY thing that gives life meaning, ffs. I say this as a parent. My son just graduated and is preparing to embark on the next chapter of his life, as am I. I'll be getting a bit more education, learning something new, working, making new friends, and traveling. The old template for life (go to college, get married, have kids) is only one iteration of life choices out of MANY.
My wife and I are in our 70's and never had children and we got to travel the world, not spend all our money on children or their educations. We have had a great life so far and I still don't like kids in restaurants after 8:00 pm.
Brutal Takedown With An Incredibly Accurate Burn
I think it’s Harry Wormwood from Matilda (at least in the movie)
Load More Replies...Must Be Icing Themselves After That Roasting
It’s Okay Jesse
The country is at a place where two parents who love each other also love their children? That sounds fantastic!
Yeah. . .if this jerk was trying to prove some homophobic point, he definitely picked the wrong pic. What a lovely family
Load More Replies...Jesse Kelly is the asshat who, during his 2010 congressional campaign against Gabrielle Giffords in Arizona, invited his supporters to a range to shoot fully automatic rifles at targets printed with images of Giffords. This stunt failed to win the election for him. (For those who may have forgotten, several months later Giffords was shot and almost killed. No direct connection, as far as anyone knows. But Kelly remains an asshat.)
Thank you for the info, as disturbing as it is.
Load More Replies...My heart goes out to the LGBTQ community in the US right now. The conservatives have made it their mission to wage war against them in any number of ridiculous ways.
Yup. And they're prioritising the trans part of that community at the moment because they feel that's where they can drive the biggest wedge.
Load More Replies...They look happy? Is it what we became? Happy? The horror! How could we!
Why would anybody care who loves whom? C'mon, people, I want to know who all these bigots are whose own lives are so fulfilling and complete that they have the time to make this a part of it. The stress of carrying around the awesome burden of that kind of fear and hate must really take a toll on one's mental state.
I read an article years ago about a couple, both trans. He still had all the organs though, so they decided to have a child. and presto, a pregnant man right there. I wonder what people like Jesse would say about that.
They would say that he was still a woman, so there's no pregnant man, obviously. Ah well. Good for the couple, though!
Load More Replies...You could read that first tweet as a supportive one? Look how far we have come that we can enable two men in a loving relationship to become fathers? Although I don’t know who Jesse Kelly is, maybe he is complete wanker?
It could be supportive but, yes, Kelly is a total wanker, so that's not what he was going for.
Load More Replies...It’s amazing how I can look at the picture and see it as beautiful and others see it and they immediately feel hatred.
Parental Disparages
hang on now. No need to slag these moms. Lets point the anger where it needs to be. At the government and the laws. The police definitely lock up black men more than anyone else for reasons that others would not be locked up for. I know my comment here wont change anything but I will vote. Thankfully many people will get released as recreational laws change. needs to happen faster.
Gotta say this has a lot of truth to it if you actually look at the disproportionate incarceration rates!
Red State vs. Blue State Problems
I f*****g hate this country; it's honestly embarrassing.... wtf is wrong with people. Oh wait, they're good ol' Christians that don't believe in science or have empathy for others... but, Trump??? "Hell yeah, 'MERICA!!!!" 🤢
Load More Replies...I cannot imagine the incomprehensible pain of losing a child. But worse, I cannot imagine losing my child to a random shooter in a country that refuses to do anything about it. Imagine getting that phone call...that the child you carried, gave birth to, loved and protected, kissed goodnight...was shot dead in their classroom. That you will never see them smile again, never hear their laughter, never see them grow. And then, in your grief, listen to idiots b***h and moan about the importance of their right to bear arms, and the empty "thoughts and prayers" of corrupt politicians. Disgusting and enraging.
I was not prepared to cry at work today, but here I am. This is my biggest fear in life. I dread sending my son(10) to school every day. We have had several conversations with him about what to do if this happens. So glad summer starts next week.
Load More Replies...Oh, Texas do love children!! they just have to be in wombs!!
And please tell me how many children have died from wearing a mask? Come on B***h, I'm waiting.
No surgeons have keeled over after wearing masks for hours of surgery, or gotten brain damage from 'too much carbon dioxide'.
Load More Replies...Exhibit one as to why there isn't enough money in the world to make me live in America, I just wouldn't gamble my children's lives by sending them to an American school. I can imagine nothing worse than losing a child, to lose my baby to a violent death knowing they died terrified and in agony? It would destroy me. Then to know my government will do nothing to stop it happening again and again - just adds insult to injury. In 2022 there were 46 shootings in k-12 schools - forty f*****g six! Why aren't Americans rioting in the streets and removing guns from their communities? I live in Scotland, we had one, ONE, school shooting in 1996 - laws changed, 27 years without our kids being gunned down in school. I couldn't even imagine living in a reality where I even need to consider that to be a possibility. If you choose your right to own a gun over the safety of your children you've already lost. I wish Americans could understand the outside perspective.
One of so many reasons we're sending our daughter to college in the UK. Norwich, specifically. She made it through high school alive, although there was a mass school shooting at a high school just 2 districts over. I'd like to see her survive university, too.
Load More Replies...People In Glass Houses Shouldn‘T Throw Stones
I'm very glad that I live in a country where a kid that unnecessarily travelled 100's miles away from home, armed like a soldier, to a protest and then proceeded to shoot people to death in a claimed 'self defence' would not only be convicted of several counts of murder, but would be serving a whole life sentence. I hope the USA can join the civilised world one day.
@Dekker451, Rittenhouse was in a state where he didn't reside, with no valid reason to be there, in possession of a weapon that, due to age restrictions, was illegal for him to possess in that state. The miserable little fúck went there with the deliberate intent to kill someone, and he accomplished his goal. Self defense had nothing to do with it. You are a fúcking imbecile.
Load More Replies...For they shall inherit the curds...
Load More Replies...He may have gotten away with murder in a legal sense, but the little bastard will have to watch his back for the rest of his miserable, worthless life. There are plenty of people out there who wouldn't mind the opportunity to administer a little home-grown justice.
Load More Replies...People like this are why I'm a liberal with an AR15. I f*****g HATE it, but when s**t hits the fan, I'm not going to be outgunned.
Courage Is All You Need? Huh?
ME: I wanna go to Gdansk! Tour agency: Touch a tarantula first, that would be your courage deposit!
he's not wrong though. You "Can" travel for free. It is really difficult, likely cold/hot and takes a while to get anywhere far but it is possible without money. eating will be tough as well as shelter but you could do it. I dont want to. Ill sit here in the AC and eat my tendies thank you very much.
If my medical history could act as payment, every flight I take would be free.
Seriously? Ireland?!
Imperialism is a hell of a drug, but nothing compared to the Krokodil that runs amok in the Russian political and military high echelons
I don't think they take Krokodil at the higher echelons. Once you try Krokodil, you have less than a year to live, and it's cheap as hell. It's a gutter drug. The higher echelons are obviously doing cocaine. Makes them feel invinceable and highly agressive.
Load More Replies...Ireland 'Doesn't respect it's neighbour'??? Seriously, respect the country that invaded us, took whatever they wanted, left us destitute and ruined. Watched us starve while hoarding all the food we grew. 'Runs a hybrid war'? No! Just no! you clearly don't know what a hybrid war is. It was actually (to coin a USAvian term) an 'irregular war'. If The Troubles In Northern Ireland, you know, a whole different country, had been successful for the republicans, it would have been called a 'War of Independence'. 'Supports terrorism throughout it's history'??? Where the f**k did you get that from? ONE group! have been declared terrorists by the United Kingdom, and that group had support from the President of the US (admittedly not "officially") and many other American political groups. Regardless of where you stand on the Northern Ireland issue, You'd have to be a fecking idiot to compare the 2!
I know! Made my blood boil to read this! The Irish were decimated during the famine thanks to the ruling British, and remains the only country in the world to have a smaller population 100 years later - and yet, we still emerged with our own culture and identity intact. One group of terrorists does not define the nation, and Ireland has never invaded anywhere. This person has obviously never opened a book, let alone a history book, in their life.
Load More Replies...Jesus Christ I can’t believe I just read this. Why do they still not teach about the Irish genocide
The British Empire, screwing up the world everywhere they planted their flag.
I truly believe everyone left in Russia has lost their damn minds or is huffing so much copium, their lungs are hammer and sickle shaped now. Putin is living in a bunker being told fantasy stories about 300 HIMARS destroyed and 400 Abrams tanks and 10,000 dead UAF soldiers... Prigozhin is the only one talking sense and he is a dirty rat bastard. Russian volunteer corp and whoever else the SBU is backing has the country on the edge of kicking off the largest civil war in modern history. But people in Moscow and St petes are just dooting around with their stupid Z wear and knock off western clothes pretending none of this is going on. Russians who are still there are going to be rudely awakened to their new servitude to China. We are seeing a defining moment in history.
Oh, you are offering your home for Russians willing to leave their country?
Load More Replies...You cannot define a country by groups of extremists.
Load More Replies...Yes. If your country is invaded you have no right to fight back. That's just using history as an excuse for violence. We must all passively accept occupation.
Load More Replies...Idk If Repost But
If these are the Vietnamese ones, my friend (who is from there) says they are rice patty rats and totally different to what westerners perceive as a rat, and they taste good. I want to try them still so bad
I ate a barbecued field rat on a stick in Thailand, out in the middle of nowhere. It was actually quite tasty. Think dark chicken leg meat. Would eat again!
Load More Replies...Meat's meat brah. It's all protein. [goes back to munching on cricket snacks]
What do crickets taste like? I'm genuinely curious.
Load More Replies...She had a point but people who experience racism are not "playing victim".
Load More Replies...Sweet Jebus. The butchery of the English language by both parties is beyond words.
Please don't say y'all. I'm black and we are not all him by a long shot.
I don't like meat. I have severe trouble digesting protein and it is just not worth the pain and I'll effects for days. Having said that though, I am from Appalachia. We eat things like raccoon, muskrat, opossum, boar, squirrel, quail, etc. I've had squirrel, and venison and both landed me on the bathroom floor praying for death. I wouldn't try these but I would knock someone else for it. Might taste amazing, especially with a little drizzle of spicy barbecue sauce! Get your meat on! ♥️
Every culture is different. We breed cows to eat and waste them while in India they are holy.
Apparently Stars Are The Work Of The Devil
I mean, he was never going to fail there. Rolled a natural 20 on his charisma check.
I'm sorry that this might sound stupid, but what does that mean? It's from D&D, right?
Load More Replies...Satanist are nice people. The media makes it out to be something they’re not.
Rarely do outspoken critics have a clue what they are talking about!
Load More Replies...Yup, and they are evil. Then again I'm a NY Giants fan so I'm a bit biased. They're in the same division.
Load More Replies...Note, in addition, that the stars on the American flag are five pointed -- just like the "evil" pentagram. Wonder what Betsy Ross was thinking.
Why didn’t anybody point out that that “Star” was actually a Pentacle and is the symbol of Witchcraft, Wicca and Magick? It’s not a symbol of evil, Magick is a beautiful craft focusing on healing and creation through the elements and through the heart, soul and mind. So stop saying dumb s**t about the Pentacle. It’s super annoying and straight-up religious discrimination. I wouldn’t say “AoUgHgh, thE CroSs Is tHe sYmbOl of jEsus aNd I Don’T beLieVe iN hiM so It muSt bE EviL,” would I? Nope!
Sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me! https://www.churchofsatan.com/eleven-rules-of-earth/
Largest Landowner Gets Owned
Born and raised in Maine here: it is a ton better than what was done in the past, which was nothing! Rather have something being planted than have the trash trees and shrubs take over everything and cause the entire cut area to become a swamp. And I won't even get into how these swampy areas produce the worst invasion of black flies that will eat you alive.
I know nothing about this, so I'm basing my opinion solely on this post. I'm not a fan of requiring allies to be perfect to appreciate the good they do, but it does sound from this like they aren't planting trees in a way that benefits the environment, but in a way that 1) allows them to receive benefits as if they were, and 2) for the purpose of profit instead of helping the environment and possibly at the expense of the environment (it's unclear whether what they're doing actively harms it but the implication is that they're preventing biodiversity).
Load More Replies...Twitter Is Amazing... Random Person Explaining An Astronaut How Space Works
Especially for someone who "claims" to know about space but does not recognize Scott Kelly's name. Hmmm.
Load More Replies...They're both right in a way. On the one hand, it is technically true that Mach number is a measurement of speed relative to the local speed of sound, so if you're in a vacuum then Mach doesn't strictly apply. However, as a matter of, if nothing else, literal survival, astronauts have to be very practical with their science knowledge. So I can see how, as a form of jargon, Mach might be used in reference to a predetermined speed regardless of medium.
If memory serves (and it might not) NASA sometimes uses a somewhat loose definition of Mach to mean 1,000 ft/sec when describing an object's reentry.
A slight difference between the ISS and the hypothetical mach 10 aircraft too. One is a station, in space just going around earth, other is a plane meant to travel from point a to point b, and hasn't been made yet. Also usually if speed is given in mach speeds even if the atmosphere varies, it means in air at standard air pressure. In space no one can hear you scream and hit your head at the wall because of the moronic things people say :)
Look who discovered wikipedia but forgot to read the original post. A hypersonic aircraft wouldn't be flying "in space" but rather inside the atmosphere.
If a train is traveling at 100mph and it come's of the tracks, it's no longer traveling on it's media, so how do you measure the speed it's going before it crash's into something?
In Response To Putting Down American Olympic Champions
I’m a Brit so I have no idea who these people are (except Biden. I know he’s the president of America).
I'm also a Brit and know exactly who Simone Biles and Megan Rapinoe are - fantastically skilled and high-achieving sportspeople. I have no idea who Jenna Ellis is and I am more than fine with that - doesn't sound like I'm missing out on much.
Load More Replies...I bet rudys farts smell worse than most. All that booze and red meat. Probably poops his pants on the reg.
Tate Exposed As A Submissive Beta
Unless you're talking about the original meaning of them...(Edit: I mean the letters!)
Load More Replies...Not to mention “Taint” gave away his location with pizza boxes in his pictures, and got his rotten a*s arrested for trafficking underage girls. Will this Epstein wannabe also “commit suicide” by hanging himself in his cell?
The whole "alpha" and "beta" thing was disproved many times, including by the guy who originally popularised it with a study that was later proved to be false. So can we just stop using those terms altogether?
Yes, She Deserves Better
I hate the caste system so much! In the past it wasn’t rigid so you could do intercaste marriage but then all this corruption made it rigid
You just inadvertently described Christianity in the US. I'm sure your comment parallels a lot of modern fascism.
Load More Replies...Lemme guess, Indian. 🤦🏻♀️. And yeah, she deserves much better. Traditional? Can cook?? I think she dodged a missile.
So there’s basically a caste system in India where your caste determines your position in society and job. Bramhin is the top most caste and they are usually the preists who concust religious ceremonies. Kshtariya is the second caste and they’re warriors. The third caste is Vaishyas who are buisnessmen and artisans while the final lowest caste is Shudras and they are the farmers and labourers who work for the higher castes
Load More Replies...Seen things like this before. He seems to care, but is worried how his family will treat her, and gets a bunch of flak for it.
It seems that he's worried about his own comfort. If the family is bigoted, the fair solution would be not to sugarcoat it to the girl and let her decide for herself (and minimize contact with the bigoted family members, if necessary).
Load More Replies...Sheesh, we have a caste system here in the US - billionaires at the top of the heap, poor working folks on the bottom!
The caste system in any nation needs to go away. I agree this poor girl will be thanking him to ending it since he is a total sexist to go with the title of bigot. Good luck young lady! You got this!
He’s an a**e, he should absolutely break up with her- me who is Indian
Load More Replies...Science V Politics V Religion
Science changes with new and better data. Politics and religion, not do much.
depending on the point being made there could be truth there. bc a LOT of the science community is heavily shaped by politics (esp when it comes to funding) and also bigotry. For eg when researchers first started looking at homosexuality in animals they were practically shunned
I always enjoy talking to those people that dislike science, they fail to realize that the arguments they provide to defend their beliefs are significantly weaker than the arguments that scientists provide. I mean when you have hundreds of ways to prove the earth isn't flat, including flying out in space and seeing for yourself, and compare it to arguing that man made climate change isn't real by just referencing a website or an anecdote, it does get quote humorous.
Translation: I don’t know how science works, or what it is really.
Religion is very much under peer review, you will be disgraced and kicked out of the community for disagreeing. Difference is good science embraces being wrong as part of learning while religion embraces ignorance.
what does the comeback mean. im an idiot so you guys dont have to tell me that. asking for a friend
Politics and religion are the opposite of science. Science is based on provable, repeatable, physical results. Politics and religion are faith based systems that rely on emotion and opinion and exist only in the human mind. "Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
Load More Replies...He Seems To Be Struggling
what I wouldn't do to spend one day with Jermaine Clement. I love that dude.
Load More Replies...Don't try a battle of wits with Jemaine Clement - it won't go well for you. He's one clever Hiphopopotamus...
Is It Possible To M**der Future Children With Words?
Paranormal Park. The blue haired kid is transgender.
Load More Replies...And Bugs and Daffy taught me that seeking hilarious revenge was normal. Bad parenting, dad.
The show is called Paranormal Park. Really cute show with a talking pug.
I’m surprised I haven’t seen backlash about “The owl house” on Disney+. It’s not only about witches and sorcery, but the main character is a lesbian. It’s a cute show. I’ve watched it a few times with my daughter if anyone is into cartoons.
I love The Owl House. But the main character is Bi not Lesbian.
Load More Replies..."george" is a perfect example of why we need to implement retroactive abortion
Good show, got a season 2 a while back. Think season 3 might've been cancelled though ;-;
What's Your Excuse?
Not everyone can just become a talented sculptor. I tried it at art school, and sucked at it. My wife, on the other hand, exhibited (and sold) her sculptures in art galleries.
plus apparently Michelangelo wanted to be a poet so he probably was like "goddamit here i am making stupid statues when other people my age are reading their poetry to their pope"
Load More Replies...Yes this is The Rape of Proserpina, by Bernini - good thing he got his chisel going early on, life expectancy in 1600 Italy was around 35 - 40 years.
As always, life expectancy factors in infant and child deaths. If you managed to reach adulthood, 60 or older wasn't unusual
Load More Replies...Education Is Important
This Is What You're Getting Upset About?
I have an Italian friend and he told me a rather interesting story once. The most famous depiction of Christ is based on the salvator mundi by da vinci 15th-16th century painting of his and that is the origin of how why he was always painted white moving forward but the fun little spice to this is that da vinci used to get his lover to pose for him. So basically everyone's been kneeling in front of a the picture of a gay renaissance Italian model asking for forgiveness. Fox News will have a f***ing fit.
This is some fascinating information that I will be sharing with my friends. I knew DaVinci was likely gay, but I didn't know he depicted the 'modern' version of Jesus. As an athiest, this information makes me happy.
Load More Replies...3) It's not American history. The story is Danish. Based on a Bavarian story.
Jesus was born Jewish I’ve heard. He was also Middle Eastern so not white.
What's the one thing Jesus wouldn't be if he came back tomorrow? Christian! And I'm not sure he'd be delighted with his followers reminding him how he died with their choice of necklace.
Load More Replies...I'm more disturbed by the fact that Red not only thinks The Little Mermaid is history, but also that it's American history.
How did "white Jesus" even become a thing? He was born in bloody Bethlehem, that's in modern day Israel.
From what I've read, the contemporary popular image of a white Jesus is based on a portrayal of Cesare Borgia... though I can't confirm this.
Load More Replies...the only reason why she wasn't black is because the original story was english (i think, definetly european) and the people around that area's skin tone was paler. thats the ONLY reason
Boss Makes A Dollar, I Make A Dime
Also not how it works. Who came up with the idea that bosses don't work? That makes no sense.
Checkmate, Atheists!
our air only contains about 20% of oxygen. oxygen alone is very dangerous.
Hadn't seen a pic of liquid oxygen before so I didn't know it was sky blue! Cool!
Empiricism is the key! Science is the same for everyone. Each religion is its own private club that has its own bizarre rules made up to differentiate it from the many other similar clubs.
Load More Replies...It's In Her Title
What do you want to bet this man thinks women can control their periods and/or that they don't have them in the summer months?
Muh Freedums!!1
Dang! I wish I could click through to those articles
Load More Replies...Incarceration nation. When you have for profit prisons run by corporations that give kickbacks to public defenders for forcing a plea deal with prison time on innocent people,e who wanted to go to trial to prove it. Also, kickbacks to judges for imposing prison sentences on petty crimes and finally legislators who force through bills that make things like not mowing your lawn offences requiring prison time. All that expense as a bonus is billed by the prisons to you the tax payer...great system eh?
He Has Superhuman Reading Speed
oh wow yeah!! lol that's hilarious they found one on BP!
Load More Replies...It's not how long it takes you read a book - it's how long what you read stays with you.
I'm sure someone who can't even get a sentence grammatically correct and uses "cuz", can read 500 pages in 30 minutes 🤦♀️
OP meant 50pages. C'mon people!! Also, if you're a writer, how would you feel? All months, if not years of your sweat, blood, and tears, not to mention million rewrites went into your WORK to be published. Then, Someone, an A-hole, reads it in less than an hour and braggs about it.
The fastest I've read a 500 page book is around 2 hours, usually longer, because that long of a book is hard to stay focused on
So still over 1000 words per minute according to the calculation in the post?
Load More Replies..."My Name Is Andrew, And I'm A Misogynist"
On another note: where on earth did he get such hideous pictures of the two? They are both such beautiful women, and they're only in their early to mid 30s
The pictures were put through some kind of aging filter. They're not accurate.
Load More Replies...i mean this is not a gender argument. it's a people argument, i have yet to meet a man that time ages like fine wine.
There are both men and women that I personally think have gotten more attractive after age 40 but it's true you usually don't hear the same thing regarding turning 60-70.
Load More Replies...This aging software is actually quite nasty and should only be used in movies, for example.
Gonna Need To Check To Nearest Hospital For That Burn
Well I would say if you're over 25 and is still dating Leonardo DiCaprio that could be a problem. /s
Honestly, I think 25 is a pretty good age to start thinking about kids. THINKING about, not already getting. Not like some people who get pregnant at like 18-19 (depending on circumstances)
And Likely Get Arrested For Indecent Exposure
Elon, None Of Us Are Surprised
This should be higher, this one I feel is a lot better than some of the ones on this list.
Trump doesn't take notes. He just takes classified government property home.
No wonder nothing ever translates to Elons long term memory... not that taking notes helps with empathy tho
Slippery slope? Yes, be more engaged, but the act of writing helps you remember the content.
That’s A Fire [sauce] Burn
I worked in a Canadian bar where I was getting $12/hr plus tips. American businessmen came by and were impressed with our cheap drink specials. I overheard them saying something like “see if we raised our minimum wage in restaurants to more than $3 an hour, this $5 cocktail would be $35!” They had no idea that all the servers here were getting paid much more than $3 an hour and we could still offer completely reasonable prices 🤯 some people really just don’t get it
About 5 years ago, TB had a $1 menu with about 12 items. I know because I would order one of each (except the cinnamon twists. $1 for air?) and the cashier(s) used to look at me like what? I would obviously eat a few and save the rest for later. Currently, I believe they only have 4 $1 items including that flavored air. I can throw a rock and hit a Taco Bell where I live. I've been in this apt for 2 years and only went once because I ordered 3 "regular" items and spent that same $11. Funk dat.
The Entitlement Is Over 9,000!
Entitlement level: Over 9,000. Moron level: Off the damn charts!!!
She is so disconnected from reality that when it calls her, it goes straight to voicemail.
Load More Replies...Part of the "shame people for doing simple essential jobs" idea so that those doing them may themselves believe they aren't entitled to a living wage because they're too much of a loser to deserve such a thing if they don't fight to claw their way upward. Absurd outlook given we need people to do all the jobs. There should be absolutely nothing wrong with the choice to do a simple job well. Maybe someone wants to work at a hardware store, or scoop ice cream, and have a peaceful life. We need these people doing those types of jobs. Not sure we need hedge fund managers, but they are exalted under this sad philosophy.
M**der With Receipts
No don't go to Facebook! There are people there that would DEFINITELY believe him!
There is literally pictures of a white man pouring bleach into a swimming pool simply because black people were in it. Disgusting
Two Flies With One Stone
Imagine if he was offering cash. You take the money, stow it away where he can't get it back. Have him sign a piece of paper stating the money is now legally yours. Then you take off your mask and proceeds to hack and cough for the entire flight until he asks you to put it back on again!
are you with me let us do it with all the panda's
Load More Replies...I worked where they reconfigure planes. That's not first class seating.
"This was after I explained they don't work." Absolutely delusional self-confidence.
Paying people for being dumb and believing in imaginary beings sounds like a great way to go broke fast.
Nature Is Beautiful
My aunt regretted waiting until her wedding night. Apparently after 2 years of dating and 1 year engaged with him saying the whole time he wanted to wait until they married to make it special... he was impotent, and not just had a little trouble getting it up, but abject failure and as useless as rubber lips on a woodpecker. He "forgot" to mention it to her. Always try before you buy ;-)
The censored word is b.u.t.t.h.o.l.e. for anyone like me who needs more coffee before playing guessing games.
If god didn't like gays, why did he give men a prostate to make it feel good? 🤭
Don't forget gay women as well. Women are proven to pleasure each other better than any other human.
Load More Replies...Then there's the couple that waited until they got married, had a good sex life for three years, then he asks here if she'll turn over so he can do it the other way, She's disgusted by this, says he's perverted wanting to do it in the other hole. He's confused, and asks her simply: but don't you want to have kids?
My response to "Why buy the cow...?" "I don't want the pig, just a bit of sausage..."
Don't marry anyone who is only doing it to get the milk
Load More Replies...I hate the transformed wife with a passion. She’s the same one that tweeted something along the lines of ‘women, look at your bodies! Breasts, ovaries and a womb. You were designed with the purpose of creating and nourishing new life. What could be more important than this?’ Ugh.
It's In Zambia, According To... (Checks Notes)... Elon Musk!
Elon ... you had so much potential, you could've done some real good to this planet, but instead you chose douchebaggery. Shame.
He had the potential to become a Bruce Wayne and then took a very wrong turn
Load More Replies...Here's how my dog is smarter and more honest than Elon: my dog will fart in his sleep, jump up, then look around, realize it was him, glare at his own b******e, then slink off knowing that it was him, and accept responsibility. He doesn't come back and say "it never happened, or what is this rotten garbage you speak of, or it was your daughter or someone else"... Elon, please glare at your face-b******e with the same judgement as my rott that farts like a water Buffalo. Thanks.
Maybe Stop Tweeting
No, That Can't Be It
What?? The first few of these made sense but Im not getting some of these
The top comment is a reply to the bottom comment. Makes more sense?
Load More Replies...what is a "toxic cultural choice"? i did google it but couldn't really make sense of it. it's a cultural norm that ends up hurting the culture? i wish i had examples regarding this post specifically. i'm old and out of touch :(
I'm not Black so this example I'm providing isn't exclusive to Black culture, but it is a pretty toxic cultural choice I'd say — toxic masculinity, the societal expectation that men should not be allowed to express emotions and vulnerability. It really hurts and impacts a lot of families and homes. If there's anything else you're confused about, I'm happy to try my best to explain!
Load More Replies...You should probably google it and learn about it instead of posting on bored panda.
Load More Replies...Absolute Savagery On The "Woke" Battlefront
Ah yes, 100% of Europeans agreeing on one thing. Definitely something that happens.
If we Europeans ever agreed on ANYTHING it would be a miracle.
Load More Replies...And You Will Know My Name Is The Lord
Agreed, but also the flip side is wrong too. I've been in some pretty bad situations and I have never (as an atheist) suddenly believed in a god.
Load More Replies...Assuming that they don't believe God created science...because if they did, they can have Dr.s and God at the same time.
Going to the doctors does not flex the benefits of atheism. I personally am grateful that God gave us a world where by applying scientific principles we can gain knowledge to save and heal others through medicine. Don't get me started on how fantastic and wondrous I find our strides technologically, I mean we are planning trips to other planets, that's brilliant.
Maybe we will, but the answer will be the same as the god-botherers who pray every day get... absolutely nothing.
Anything But That!
I'd better tag along too. I can yell about how "this isn't how it is in America" when we arrive at each new location.
Load More Replies...The only part of Cuba I wouldn't want to be in is the part the USA own, Guantanamo.
Where can I exploit these rules for my lovely vacation? I mean torture! I Definitely meant torture!!!
If you want to live in a country where everyone shows respect to the national anthem, move to North Korea.
14 whole days?!?! Where do I sign up to disrespect the anthem please? Two weeks in Cuba sound amazing
I can disrespect the National Anthem if this is the reward. What do I gotta do? Go out with a sign saying it's not anthemy enough? I'd try taking the knee, but that looks like I'm trying to get it to marry me, not disrespect it... 🤔
I dunno: many a black person was denied freedom in the country they sang the national anthem of....that ends with a line starting with 'O’er the land of the free...' THAT seems like disrespecting the national anthem.
Ok all the pictures are cool except the one of him standing in front of Che Guevara. That guy was a fraudulent murderous monster. He is not someone to celebrate. Oh and Guantanamo Bay in Cuba is beautiful.
We're Like A Family Here
Reminds me of a tweet I saw… Janel Comeau @VeryBadLlama landlord: the cost of rent has gone up businesses: that's a natural part of doing business suppliers: the cost of materials has gone up businesses: that's a natural part of doing business worker: the cost of my labor has gone up businesses: listen here you little s**t
Those In Glass Houses
That pathetic bio came up already somewhere in this list. Seems it really is one of his main pastimes to unsolicitedly message people about his bullsh!t opinions.
"body of a God" Do you have a photo of God? "...a God"? I thought there was only one and you're capitalizing the word in this context?
President And Coo Of Mma, A Marketing Trade Association, Explains To Elon Why Advertisers Are Leaving And It’s Not Activist Pressure
It seems to me that free speech would also include advertisers deciding NOT to advertise...
Nobody making these arguments ever want to consider the other side of free speech.
Load More Replies...Consider this, Would Ford (for example) decide to launch their latest advertising campaign on 4chan?
An Inspiration To Us All
It’s a good idea. Once property prices rise (and they always do eventually) the co owners can sell for a profit and invest in something for themselves. It worked for someone I knew about 40 years ago. Defo worth a try.
I have no problem with that. The median price where I live is $1,455,000. People at sites like NBC News go off national averages, which explain nothing.
20 years ago when I was in my 20s, I loved having the idea of buying a large home where my boyfriend and I could live with some of our very close friends and their significant others. I was picturing Board Game Night and Card Game Night and Video Game Night EVERY night XD But that was in my 20s, before I knew what reality actually was, and when all I really wanted was to be a nerd with my nerd friends. It was also back in the early 2000s when something like that might have been financially feasible.
If there was anyone me and my spouse could stand to actually live with, we totally would co-buy a house
Comments On Local News Article About Millennials Staying Close To Home
Fair point but this one somehow doesn't know how they destroyed the economy.
Load More Replies...Fanboys Will Fan
I don't understand the apple superiority people. All that's different is the OS and subsequently which apps are available and where you download them from. If you prefer using apple then that's fine, but not acknowledging that there are dozens of other brands on the market that offer the same features is just dumb.
They have over 2 trillion because idiots keep buying the newest iPhone year after year even though they don't need it.
nothing wrong with that. They make a product people like. I don't care for apple but I can see why some people like it. all the power to them. Its not like I get a piece of the sale if they buy an android phone. buy what you like.
Load More Replies...So Smart He's S***ting In Buckets
Hopefully he can stop his heart for longer than a second!
Load More Replies...I'll be satisfied with 5 minutes, shouldn't take to long to kill that already braindead brain
Load More Replies...I can make my heart skip a beat by just breathing out Andrew, it's called sinus arrhythmia and requires no skill. (well, it's not technically skipping a beat, but that's kinda how it feels)
"I can stop my heart for a beat at will." Yeah, if he holds his breath until he passes out. Who does he think he's fooling?
I can play chess in my mind to without losing the position in fact I can mentally win in only 4 moves
It's Almost As If
Unions Did Great Things for the American Working Class - Bloomberg https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2018-06-13/unions-did-great-things-for-the-american-working-class#xj4y7vzkg
Fifa Totally Supports Footballer Coming Out
The problem I have with this is: LET THEM CHANGE IF THEY'RE TRYING TO! They don't have to stay bad forever!
No of course not, they're keen on trying to look open-minded and inclusive. I would love to see a straight person having to owe up to his sexuality and discuss it in front of the audience, hoping that it will be accepted and that the teammates won't think he fancies them in their sheer bumhugging shorts. Straight sexuality isn't always such a glorious equlitarian thing, why don't they come out with that?
Everything else aside, Jakub Jankto is one good midfielder though.
Held their big tournament in a Muslim country that uses their religion to discriminate. Anti lgbt and such. If i remeber right women couldnt even go because of their laws.
Load More Replies...I would. Although, to be fair, I wouldn't hold my prestigious tournament there in the first place. But as they wanted it so desperately they'd stuff that many brown envelopes then they can have it, in all its rainbow flag, man on man action glory.
Load More Replies...Love Seeing These People Get Dogged On
Disney got so broke from the conservative's boycott that they posted the 4th consecutive yearly revenue increase, exceeded the 2023Q1 growth forecast by 50 million and had a long-term stock value increase of 16%
Conservatives are insane in this country. Because of their anti-LGBTQ rhetoric and their focused attacks on businesses (Target being the newest), employees in Target are being harassed by these idiots for the "crime" of Pride displays and clothing. And they are self-styled as the party of "law and order" and the "moral majority". My A S S.
It's not just pride clothing, those idiots 'boycott' for a rainbow, f*****g rainbow which is just a beautiful set of colours that happens when it rains and sun is shining. Do they shout at the rainbow to stop being gay when it shows in the sky? Sounds like Saudi Arabia and Qatar, not USA.
Load More Replies...A friend of mine is a manager at Target and they've had inclusive policies for a VERY long time, policies they actually put into practice. That doesn't seem to have put a dent in their profits before now, and I can't imagine there's much that would convince most Americans NOT to shop at Target.
All Women Are Italian Women
I, for one, am very excited that I apparently qualify for Italian citizenship!
Congratulations &, on another positive note, you may not have to pay the new Venice tourist fee when next you visit
Load More Replies...All women are humans so all humans are women... welp I'm off to disappear in a puff of logic 😅
Aristotle is probably rolling himself in his grave right now 🤦♀️ (it's an Italian expression, bare with me)
A Muslim Walks Into A Post Office
Really telling that even mentioning a Muslim holiday makes you woke to these weirdos
They don't have the capacity for critical thinking, which is why they keep repeating brain dead slogans.
Load More Replies...To Be Fair, They Aren't Really Good Food
Wait, how are these restaurants going broke if they didn't go woke?
Boomers champion the merits of capitalism, then have a shocked pikachu face when capitalism happens to their favorite brands.
I Only Share With My Friends, Not Random Stranger Kids
I'm still waiting for someone to just give me free LSD when I'm walking down the street.
a lifetime ago, I had a few 10 strips and saw two guys I knew outside of a convenience store. I told them to stick out there tongue and I slapped 2 hits on each one. It does happen. but I did know them so it wasnt some strangers.
Load More Replies...This is a bit sad, but the urban legend about poison/illicit substances in Halloween candy started when two children from the same family were killed by poison candy on Halloween night. Initially their father claimed they had picked up the candy while trick or treating, but when no other children in the neighborhood became ill the police turned their investigation to the father. Of course, it turned out the father had fed them the poison candy to collect on their life insurance. But the original reporting -- that they had been killed by candy they picked up while trick or treating -- had already taken root in people's minds, and the urban legend persists to this day.
I never once got any free drugs or razor blades; so disappointing as a kid only getting candy. Though once as stupid teens we acquired free beer; honestly, who leaves beer outside near the candy bowl? That's just asking for it to be swiped
Shít I would love some edibles. Let me experience it just once for free.
I always thought trick or treating was not worth the effort even as a kid. Apparently I'm missing out on the free drugs.
This Is What I Get For Trying To Facilitate A Bond Between My Dad And My Boyfriend
“To Quote The Once Great Kanye West…”
Why in my mind, Shaq's post had another loooooow voice??? How could this ever be???
Oh wow, so money automatically makes you more clever, wise, expert than anyone poorer than you? And let's not forget that he became rich for playing basketball, not for launching an actual business and making it prosper himself. He was just wise (or lucky) enough to hire the right people who helped him maintain/increase his money: managers, accountants, financial advisors... Also: money makes money. Fame helps too.
How Many Times Grrmartin Can Be M**dered?
The M**der-To-Word Ratio In This One Is Off The Churts
Not That Kind, The Other Kind
Would really like to know what kind of seizure description started this
Anti-vaxxers faking seizures after they supposedly got the jab.
Load More Replies...Um. Seizures do have varying levels of intensity. I taught a little girl who had minor seizures often: what it looked like was that she had completely lost focus and was out of it. My brother, with a TBI, has had those kinds of seizures also, now that his medicine controls the ones where, in his words, he "flopped like a fish". There is also something called staticus elepticus, where seizures continue for a sustained period of time. This arrogant b***h of a doctor is the one who needs to GTFO. Those of you who want more info, the Epilepsy Foundation's website is a great place to go. Maybe this nasty of piece of work should read it.
Yum!
Are we sure this guy's not a parody account? I mean every single tweet he puts out is incredibly dumb.
I really hope it is but he is 'Murican so it's probably not; we breed so many idiots here it's depressing.
Load More Replies...Anyone who calls himself an Alpha Male is just telling the world what a jerk he really is in life.
Does This Count As A M**der?
Can we normalize dads showing affection to their kids please? Whether you kiss your kid when he's 3 or 23, it's the same thing.
Thank you. I guess these same people no longer kiss their parents because "oooh icky sex times are coming", rather than just a totally non-sexual display of affection.
Load More Replies...My old man was a hard-core "man's-man" boomer. It took a fair few years (lots of swearing at first), but after giving him a hug and kiss on the forehead (he's a bit shorter) every time I left the house when visiting, he's now reached the point where his reflex reaction to saying goodbye is to open his arms for a hug. He does to anyone.
There was a comedian in Denmark who had a sh1tstorm against him on SoMe. The reason? Who posted a picture of himself being in a bath rub with his daughter. People were outraged and yelled r*pe at him online. I was more outraged that people were offended by a dad hanging out with his kid. I mean... it was clear that they were having a blast and the girl was NOT being molested in any way. The amount of people who will disregard what they actually see and instead complain about what their sick, adult minds tries to show them... it's crazy.
I understand that her comment was dumb but s**t shaming people we don't agree with is not the way to do things
The kiss, okay, nothing about that. But having his teenage son sitting in his lap... is kinda weird.
Linkedin Has Become A Cesspit
Why don't manufacturers recycle the parts instead of dumping them to rust and possibly pollute? It seems to be a thing: 78c2c54a-9...39bf06.jpg
i believe there is a legal reason, similar to what happened to that bolt brand of ebikes, it is not the manufacturer that let these car go to waist, it was the company that bought the fleet, and only because they were locked into an issue of ownership vs lack of capital, whee the company that own them went broke and dint have money to recycle them, but the government couldn't claim ownership to be able to sell them before they became trash from being abandoned.
Load More Replies...What I can´t stand is the audacity of some EV-makers to first sell their car for 50.000 to 100.000 $ and charge monthly rent for the battery.
What EV makers do that? I work in retail automotive and I’ve never heard of a monthly rent charge for the battery (I did try to Google it but maybe I’m using the wrong words)
Load More Replies...Brilliant Context
Extra context: The King doesn't get to rule anything more complex than what they serve for dinner in the palace. And even that's a maybe
I think he'll probably lose that argument to Camilla.
Load More Replies...I think the prime minister is mostly in charge (please correct me if I’m wrong)
Yeah that's the leader for the most part. The PM is where you get to make bad choices like Brexit and having COVID parties.
Load More Replies...Why Not Just Sit Back And Enjoy The Movie For 2 Hours?
Fun fact. The writers of the script for Top Gun 2 worked with a US Navy commander and a US Navy captain; they asked the consultants to come up with the hardest, most risky mission a US Navy air squadron could be required to do in case of an armed conflict with a Russian-backed enemy country, namely Iran. The mission in the movie is exactly that: the US Navy worst case scenario mission, except that they ditched the "while flying at night" part for cinematic reasons.
The most surprising thing is that the mission being exactly the same as the Star Wars "trench run" was actually a complete coincidence.
Load More Replies...Narrow canyon? Surface to air missiles? This is old. Very old. 1977-old ....
surface to air missiles are very much still in use, my friend
Load More Replies...Expose All The Algorithms! All Of Them!
When Elon acquired twitter her said he was going to require all the programmers and everyone responsible for the backend of twitter to hand over their code to him to show exactly how twitter runs, millions upon millions of lines of code. everyone in his little circle thought this was a great idea and it was going to show how the left is destroying twitter, or something like that.
Load More Replies...He's One Of The Good Ones
Same. I would find a way to make an inappropriate joke and be fired the day before the sale went through.
Load More Replies...Gyad Dayum
She Went On A Rampage
I think maybe the girl in the picture is saying that the other girls are all unattractive/only moderately attractive. The comment on the top is pointing out that the girl in the picture has no skills or personality. Just breast implants and that is why no one wants to talk to her at the convention. They're both acting stupidly
Load More Replies...Hopefully there are people like me who read comments before looking at posts. Let me warn you that most of them are funny but there are some sad, sad things on here. A couple mentions of suicide and gun violence - Things that do NOT belong on a list with this title. I was cracking up then all of a sudden I felt like I got hit by a semi.
That is unfortunately very common on Bored Panda, at least on lists like this one. They censor some words, but don't give any warning about the content. Some kind of heads up in the form of a disclaimer in the title would probably be a good idea.
Load More Replies...How come most of these are just shots at conservatives? I’m not one to choose sides but it felt more one sided. We need all around laughs.
Hopefully there are people like me who read comments before looking at posts. Let me warn you that most of them are funny but there are some sad, sad things on here. A couple mentions of suicide and gun violence - Things that do NOT belong on a list with this title. I was cracking up then all of a sudden I felt like I got hit by a semi.
That is unfortunately very common on Bored Panda, at least on lists like this one. They censor some words, but don't give any warning about the content. Some kind of heads up in the form of a disclaimer in the title would probably be a good idea.
Load More Replies...How come most of these are just shots at conservatives? I’m not one to choose sides but it felt more one sided. We need all around laughs.
