50 Posts From People Who Shamed Their Roommates Online And Rightfully So

Not everyone can afford a one-bedroom apartment and have the luxury of living alone. Especially not in this economy. We've prepared some tips for you on how to find the right match for a roommate. Below, there's also advice on what to do when arguments and conflicts arise between your roommate and you.

As in most situations that involve people, communication is key. Learning conflict resolution is a useful skill that will probably be necessary later on in life. That's especially useful for college and university students who are living with strangers for the first time in their lives.

Jana Valentine, assistant dean of residential life and community standards at Bryant University in Rhode Island told U.S. News that living in a dorm equips you with conflict resolution skills for the future. 

"It's inevitable whether you're in a roommate relationship, a group project, in a student organization, or on a team," she said. "We want to provide students with the skills to work through things that they can then take and have with them."

In this day and age, it's possible to do a sort of background check on your roommate prior to agreeing to live together. But you can't trust social media blindly, Monique Bates, director of residential life at Longwood University in Virginia, told U.S. News.

"[Don't] assume that how that person presents themselves to be on social media is who they actually are." She suggests meeting with the person a few times before deciding whether to be roommates.

Jana Valentine also noted that opting to live with friends might not be the best idea. "Sometimes your best friends don't make the best roommates. And sometimes a really good roommate is a great person to live with, but maybe you're not best friends outside of the living situation. And that's okay too."

Living with a roommate in college or university can be extra hard because it might be the other person's first time living on their own. Heather Mayone, LCAT, licensed clinical art therapist and director of NYC’s Tribeca Therapy, told SELF that different people come with different understandings of what it means to take care of a shared space.

"It’s such an intense thing to go from, in the majority of cases, living under your parents’ roof to living with a friend or complete stranger on your own."

Establishing ground rules early is key. Experts highly suggest writing up a roommate contract. Kat Cohen, CEO and Founder of college guidance company IvyWise, told CNBC Make It that it doesn't need to be an official document. "Learn more about his or her living preferences, what chores and responsibilities you will share, and how he or she feels about visitors."

Martha Wessell, MSW, a clinical therapist in the Ohio State University Housing & Residence Education department, claims that her institution highly advises students to draw up a roommate agreement.

Topics to cover should include significant others, storing food, using each other's stuff, quiet hours. "This conversation is about trying to help each other think about mutual respect," Wessell told SELF.

The experts also say to keep realistic expectations. Many people imagine that their roommate will become their best friend. Kat Cohen told CNBC Make It that people should refrain from romanticizing the situation. "Instead of placing unrealistic expectations on the nature of this relationship, focus on fulfilling your responsibilities as a roommate by being considerate and conscientious."

Having an honest discussion about what's bothering you is also important. Don’t leave passive aggressive notes for your roommate. Katie Burns, academic advisor and college admissions counselor at IvyWise, a New York-based education consulting company, told U.S. News that letting anger fester can only escalate the conflict.

"When you're living in close quarters, it can be hard and tensions can be high. There's a lot of emotions that happen in college, but you can always work things out with good communication."

If nothing seems to work, the best decision is to move out. Ashleigh Edelstein, LMFT, writes that mental health and safety are worth far more than sticking it out with a terrible roommate. If you've signed the lease recently, ask your landlord whether subletting is an option.

If moving isn't financially doable at the moment, look for apartments with $0 deposits. Put together a budget and a savings plan – perhaps it's not doable now, but it will be something to look forward to.