When you see a fortune cookie, it's not the cookie you're craving; it's the fortune. I mean, there are plenty of baked desserts, but how many of them also act as a fortune teller? Or at least pretend to be it? On the other hand, is there a better fortune teller and hidden message carrier, than a tasty one? Some of these fortune cookie messages, however, are so surprising, they catch people completely off-guard. Bored Panda has compiled a list of some of the funniest phrases ever found in fortune cookies to prove that Confucius isn't behind all of them. And if you do believe in chiromancy, best leave it to professionals and not the fortune cookie sayings.
Though commonly thought to originate in China, the fortune cookie comes from the Japanese tsujiura senbei treat. Allegedly, the first fortune cookie was eaten in the US around the 1890s. Chinese had tried to import the American-popularized goodie later on, but it turned out, that the public thought it to be 'too American.'
From rude insults to questionable dares, the people who discovered these funny fortune cookies definitely had a hard time swallowing them. Scroll down to read the hilarious list!
This post may include affiliate links.
He Sat And Watched Me Eat Chinese Take-Out For Half An Hour. Then This Happened
Definitely The Scariest Fortune Cookie I've Ever Gotten
Didn't Expect My Fortune Cookie To Be So Insightful
Best Fortune I Have Ever Got In A Fortune Cookie
Fortune Cookie
My Wife And I Received Matching Fortunes At Dinner This Evening
My Ironic Fortune Cookie
My Coworker Just Came Back From Sick Leave; He Had A Heart Attack. To Celebrate We Went For Chinese. These Were In His Fortune Cookie
Take That Big Step
My Wife's And My Fortune Cookies. Hers Is On Top
Just When I Thought I Got A Good Fortune Cookie
Don't Expect Much From A Cookie
Well Screw You Too Fortune Cookie
My Wife And I Also Got Some Fortune Cookies
This Was In My Fortune Cookie Last Night... Should I Call Somebody Or?..
Faster Than The Bear
Two Fortunes In One Cookie - Aaaaand I'm Offended
When A Fortune Cookie Finally Speaks Up
I Think This Wins The 'Worst Fortune Cookie Of All Time' Award
I don't know. I got a fortune cookie once and there wasn't a fortune in it. Someone took pity on me and gave me another cookie and it didn't have a fortune in it either.
I Think My Fortune Cookie Just Threatened Me
As in at the supermarket behind the freezer before the security guard catches you?
My 3 Year Old Nephew Asked Me To Read Him His Fortune
The Best Fortune Cookie Fortune Ever
What A Tease Haha
How Did The Cookie Know?
This Fortune Cookie Is Too Real...
My 9 Year Old Daughter Got This Fortune, I'm Happy For Her
My Friend's Misprinted Fortune Is Kinda Dark
My Fortune Cookie Has Either Seen Or Done Some Sh*t
Worst Fortune Cookie Ever
My Fortune Cookie Fortune Is Strangely Distraught
Avoid Gambling, But Hey, These Numbers Are Lucky!
I Spent 30 Minutes Trying To Get My Fortune Without Breaking The Bag Or Cookie
Which One Of You Bastards Works In The Fortune Cookie Business?
My Friend Got Rick Rolled By A Fortune Cookie
I have to quickly scroll past those lyrics before I get the song stuck in my head.
Thank You Captain Obvious
Our School Fortunes Use A New Kind Of Motivation
Oops
There's a chance that the bulgogi you enjoyed at the Korean restaurant, at the Winter Olympics, may have been served with Man's Best Friend. Dog-on-the...951595.jpg
Pretty Sure My Fortune Cookie Is Telling Me To Masturbate...
So Honest
My Fortune Cookie Sounds Like Satan Trying To Give A Motivational Speech
Unusual Predictions
I Think My Fortune Cookie Just Threatened Me
My Pet Is Planning What?
Nonsense. My 12 foot crocodile is so well educated. Just look how he smiles and drools while he sees me.