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In a world where fake news is not necessarily something that the press can be proud of, this women’s magazine parody comes as a breath of fresh air, showing how to combine comedy, feminism and satire all at once.

The result is Reductress, the internet’s beloved “one and only fake women's magazine,” which skillfully mocks women’s lifestyle magazines, outdated perspectives and the condescending tone of popular women’s media.

Founded in 2013 by two editors, Beth Newell and Sarah Pappalardo, Reductress has turned into a cult-following website, an Instagram page with 738k followers, and a whimsical merch store. Their posts include hilarious combos of smart headlines and accompanying covers that will surely crack you up.

More info: Reductress.com | Instagram | Facebook 

#1

Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

reductress Report

Vicky Z
Community Member
4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have spent hours just trying to find what to watch until i fell asleep

Craig Reynolds
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Typical human. I can get annoyed about a 2-hour movie, then go and binge-watch an entire season of a TV show. I binge-watched the final season of Lucifer the day the new episodes were released. I have no self-control...

SheHulk
Community Member
Premium
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Been there!

Merel Fabre
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yeps, been there, done that :)

Brian Bennett
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love movies but only old ones - you know where the actors can act and they do it with their clothes on!

Alditekim
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Movies are too long. I can't bear it. Then proceed to watch the first 10 minutes of pilot episodes from various tv series to find what's interesting and end up wasting the amount of hours longer than the Lord of the rings movies.

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    #2

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    I I
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    just as i embrace my... err.... feminist side.. i guess... as i cook then clean the pots/kitchen

    François Carré
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I must be completely hermaphrodite since I'm single and have to do all the home chores on my own, while having daily arguments with myself over being too lazy and consistently leaving things undone.

    Ryan-James O'Driscoll
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You cook or you clean is my dinner process. Unfortunately I live alone and I have to eat...

    My O My
    Community Member
    Premium
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am very masculine then

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    41 years of marriage we do it together!

    DC
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hm. I eat alone. Cook alone, do dishes alone - or the machine I bought alone does. Am I, kind of, less of a guy now or what?

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't understand the meaning of that title.

    Jessica Gunn
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It means a couple things... 1- it makes a passive aggressive statement on the sexist notion that cooking and kitchen stuff are a distinctively female job to do.. And 2-sometimes we (the collective men AND women) can't just 'leave it be' after cooking, and absolutely MUST clean up the kitchen after cooking.

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    #3

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A lot of women will relate

    Mazer
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never happened, she dreamt it

    Leo Domitrix
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Be a bigger miracle if they cured it.

    EP
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Explain this to me?

    littlesaresare
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Endometriosis is a very common and very debilitatingly painful disease of the uterus. But despite this, doctors very rarely take it seriously. Women have a difficult time getting diagnosed, let alone treated. The picture is making a joke out of the fact that it's a miracle whenever a woman can get her doctor to acknowledge that endometriosis even exists.

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    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My ex-doctor could not diagnose a hang nail without google or another medical site!

    Synsepalum
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ugh, yes. Took me ages to get my endo diagnosed.

    Reductress, a parody women’s magazine, was created back in 2013 by Sarah Pappalardo and Beth Newell and it soon evolved into a women’s humor site, which now attracts a readership of up to 1M. It now focuses on satirizing the ways women’s media aims at capitalizing on feminism while still promoting values that are outdated and inadequate. Moreover, the site has been parodying aspects of feminism such as white feminism, which essentially lacks awareness of privilege.

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    #4

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Kathi Schäffer
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow, this hit very close to home. Except with my Dad...

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Telling someone for 25 years that they are not good enough has a negative impact on their self-confidence? No way! /s

    Leo Domitrix
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I don't get you," says my mom. Me: "Mom, you MADE me.".....

    Chik Nuggs
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i’m sorry i’m dumb what are the 1’s for after the comment

    Aamna Shah
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even if you try to explain it time and again.

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Maybe because you depend on mommy too much!

    TheAnimalLady
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe because "mommy" has been "training" you from birth and messing with your head.

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    #5

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    tuzdayschild
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You know why? Because it wasn't traumatic for them.

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    Dina Simoné
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The tree remembers, the axe forgets.

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They always pretend they don't, because they would rather die than admit they could have ever been wrong.

    Amina Hays
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Both of my parents forgot I was peeing blood when I was 9 and also forgot that I, now an adult, was put onto a transplant list. When I mentioned it, they both got angry and wanted to know why I hadn't told them, I pulled out my phone and showed my mum that I had sent, including telling her more when I saw them next. Which was Christmas Day. They scoffed and got huffy and said, well I don't remember that. Merry Christmas to me.

    Manndy Fisher
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah " I was just joking when I called you a wh*re, get over it"

    Alexia
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They do, but in a very twisted way. Like, "nothing happened", "you imagined most of it", or "you made a drama out of a trifle" or "it was long ago". Therefore, they never acknowledge, understand or apologize. My mother was so offended when I tried to talk to her about it, that she started cursing me.

    Kitty Kat
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The axe forgets but the tree remembers.

    Brandy Grote
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Arg. Even when the trauma popped out of her mouth...

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've read this one. A LOT. Oh MY have I ever...

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    #6

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Vic
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree, what is worse is people thinking that they chose this. Who would choose to be ridiculed and singled out, just for trying to be themselves..

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    Sky Render
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would like to be both if possible! At least there are some safe spaces...

    Sky Render
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Large portions of the world do not like transgender women and particularly extremist sorts want us dead. Any trans woman who does not "pass" (ie. you cannot tell at a glance their birth sex) is in danger of being victimized socially, mentally, emotionally, physically, or even mortally.

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    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Then don't go public! People that are threatened by you are insecure in their own identity and that makes them potentially dangerous. People that are different from what is considered the norm will never be truly safe. That is just the way it is because that is just the way hi=uman nature is. Lower your expectations of humanity as we are literally the worst species on Earth and the most dangerous. Primates. of which humans are a sub-species are the only species that commit inter-species murder intentionally.

    So in order to find out more about the stereotypical values propagated by women’s magazines, and what it says about the media in general, we spoke with Lina Survila. Lina is the founder and editor in chief of Abstract Stylist, an alternative magazine and news website that describes itself as “your modern guide to kitschy fashion, culture, and alternative lifestyle,” so the topic hit close to home.

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    When speaking of stereotypes in women’s media, it becomes clear that “media is more outdated than the audience,” and added that “magazines portray women surrounded by stereotypes.” “We see a lot of interviews with young women professionals where they get asked way more about dating, their sexual experiences, or balancing work and family. Men usually don't get those kinds of questions,” Lina explained.

    #7

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Went with a guy who didn't know what mysterious meant!

    Seabeast
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or who doesn't really listen to your answers when he asks questions.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mother and son pic was a strange choice for this one, lol

    TheAnimalLady
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Um, look at that body language Nothanks, I really don't think (or hope) that they're related.

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    #8

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Casey McAlister
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't need a guide for that, I excel at this.

    Eagle Girl
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Disagree, there's so much in BP to make it worthy of sleep depravation ;)

    TheAnimalLady
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, been there, done that...way too many times🤦🤦‍♀️🤦‍♂️

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    Night Owl
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm a master at that

    Just saying
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do this. I don't know why I do this, but i still do this.

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    #9

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Alexia
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is for my parents. Violent, abusive, always yelling, arguing and insulting each other, then turning on me to vent their fury (I was 7 y.o.). After some years of this s**t, they started to be mad at me for how I treated my younger brother: yelling, arguing and insulting him. I wonder where I had learnt such behaviour.

    Lauren Ganze
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    crazy ex girlfriend: maybe a little emotional, wanted to be treated like an actual human. crazy ex boyfriend: stalker, possibly murderer

    Eagle Girl
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    PREACH!! I'd share this with my ex but he'd just end up justifying how it's my fault lol

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please realize that CRAZY and be reversed to treating you like s**t! (try it you'll like it!)

    Pål Dyvik
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like soot? Seat? Shot? Soft? Salt? Spit? Suit? I give up...

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    As a result, the media stereotypically sees women in very bizarre situations when gender becomes a keyword in the headline. “So, for example, journalists seem very surprised when women do or share their luck in, e.g., investing. Equal rights in the media are something that we all should manifest!”

    #10

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Sue Bradley
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just brilliant - and yes I am vegan :)

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Happy Thanksgiving to everyone after this😅😅😅

    Logic and Reason
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tofu’s great, with the stipulation that you cook it right. Most kinds of frying will do it well but I really like air fried tofu myself.

    Belle Miles
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Laughing so hard knowing that is me.

    Tim Smith
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I went to the original article and was laughing so hard at this I was literally in tears.

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So what? You are not supposed to eat the things you pull out from that hole, you know.

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    #11

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    chi-wei shen
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Money is one of the best (if not the best) stress blockers known to mankind.

    earringnut
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I woke up today to the thought of two things I have to move around in my monthly budget so that I have money next week. So I'm going to go with yup.

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    Tami
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Money is nice, but it can't buy samadhi.

    Bird lover
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it can buy food, rent, clothes, bills, and medical insurance though!

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    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Money I the answer to all the problems in the world except mortality.

    Jessica Gunn
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eh, somehow I have a feeling that the wealthy ruling elite of the world have got that figured out...

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    #12

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Vic
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You are smart, my friend! I can feel it in your comments.

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    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And wondering where the hell it all went.

    Demongrrrrl
    Community Member
    Premium
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I used to be smart in school. I got a Bachelor's and Master's degrees

    Demongrrrrl
    Community Member
    Premium
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But feel really stupid now. Doing and saying things that I should know better than to do.

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    Synsepalum
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She's dressed like one of Santa's elves.

    TheAnimalLady
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🧑‍🎄THAT'S why she looks so familiar🤶

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    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because she didn't understand a thing she wrote!

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ha, I read my s**t in college...wtf was I thinking. Really hope the professors forgot about me.

    BG
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I read things that I wrote in college and try to remember what I was smoking back then.

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    Moreover, “if you are a woman, you were probably very confused when Britney Spears was asked about her sex life with her boyfriend at the time,” Lina said and added that “unsurprisingly, the question was asked by a man.”“Or the time when Rihanna shot straight up and answered, ‘What kind of man are you looking for tonight’ with her now-famous quote, 'I am not looking for a man; let's start there.'"

    #13

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Quick! Tip toe over to get a closer look at this precious sight before they move. Take one step and they wake up.

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe the poor thing looked up and saw that freakin pillow!

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    #14

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Swearing and screaming loudly is great therapy and cheaper than a psychologist!

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    Nessy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Singing is meant to activate your vagus nerve. Which helps with anxiety. Maybe screaming has the same affect?

    Xottel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As a heavy metal singer I can confirm that.

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    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because it is the only thing that helps

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At one hospital i worked on a heavy duty medical/surgical 31 bed step down unit all of us were so stressed we wanted to ask the psychiatric floor if we could use their scream room (they had one) on our breaks.

    Eagle Girl
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why hold it in when you can let it out?

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    #15

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    I I
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    the old "im not racist but"..........

    Monday
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Listen guys, I'm not racist but I really love reading books on rainy days.

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    April Caron
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah. Yes. The “I bake cakes, but not for same sex couples getting married.” Terrible.

    Nona Wolf
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    How about "Everyone can speak their mind on twitter - but not President Trump"? Is that also terrible?

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    Caro Caro
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And use religion to force mine down your throat

    Nona Wolf
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Do you mind Biden forcing experimental medicine "down your throat"?

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    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I am not a religious extremist, but killing babies is bad.

    Whitney Gal
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No one advocates killing babies (except, ironically, the Judeo-Christian God).

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    #16

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    I I
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    covid cases coming to that list soon

    Hotdogking
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Does driving friendly the Texas way mean you only shot your gun in the air once when passing a car, or screaming “I’M AN AMERICAN “ at everything that would cause an accident so it doesn’t get in your way? Asking for a friend

    Nona Wolf
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Tell your friend that democrat run Chicago had more shooting than Afghanistan this week.

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    Petra, princess of Brigid
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Texas drivers don't drive friendly, I can tell you that.

    Jessica Gunn
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Translation of the sign: "speed limits and rules of the road are just suggestions"

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lived there. Nothing safe about driving in the big cities. Turn signals are for sissies. Make them guess. No, you may not merge onto this highway. That means you'll be ahead of me. And just get the hell out of my way! But, when it comes to this, you may not insert yourself into something that is no one's business to get into. Like any other health issue in anyone's life, to say it in the Texas vernacular "Ain't nobody's business but their own hon' "

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    Savannah Cooper
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    the fact that this isn't even like fake anymore is goddamn terrifying

    Leodavinci
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Drive Friendly"? Like the way those Texas Trumpers did when a bus full of Biden supporters drove through?

    Mark Baumgartner
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That lone star is a trip advisor rating average.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Drive friendly?! This is the state where they charge at the mexican border in trucks and fire automatic rifles at refugees, yes?

    Tee Witt
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Also many women waistlines

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    All abortions are unsafe, as they kill children.

    Tamra Stiffler
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What about an ectopic pregnancy, which requires an abortion, otherwise the mother will absolutely die? What about the genetic defects that would prevent the child from surviving outside the womb? If you had a daughter, wife or sister who was brutally raped? Should they be forced to go through pregnancy, labor and childbirth? Honestly, I feel like men should NOT have any say whatsoever in making these laws. Period. You're entitled to your asinine opinions, however.

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    Lina believes that “women's media is filled with hate for women and teaches girls to compete and envy each other. Instead, it should be focused more on gender balance, equal rights, and genderless topics.” Meanwhile, “what Reductress does is using irony to get people's attention to absurd news headlines we all strive for.”

    Lina continued: “Now everything can be told as news. Usually, women-orientated publications talk about stereotypical things like health, well-being, self-love, but sometimes we just want to hear more on investing, art, automotive news, and space.” According to the editor, Reductress found a way of pointing out the big painful spot in women's media, and their traffic validates their message.

    #17

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or starts stalking you after you try to convince them you aren't either.

    Seabeast
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I briefly had one like that years ago. Told me I'd better not get to thinking I owned him or anything. Then got miffed because I wouldn't drop everything at 9:00 p.m. on a weeknight to join him at some bar on the other side of town.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mother is rolling on the floor now. I feel attacked.

    julie son
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I also like the "I want a strong, independent woman" one, which basically translates to "I'll be there for the good times, but don't count on me when things get hard".

    River Webb
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    and it turns out he's talking to a professional Therapist

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    #18

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    I I
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    bless her caucasian heart

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh cmon, you know better. White people are EVIL; we don't have hearts.

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    Deja Katz
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Shouldn’t it be white woman hospitalised after being called racist? God forbid!

    Tina Hugh
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So, this is just pure hatred of white females. How amusing and clever

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My god what would have happened had she been called black! (ICU or the morgue)

    Yort
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Must be that woman who said she was being oppressed because the HOA told her to take a flag down.

    Black Karen
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For those of you who dont get it its a parody of overly sensitive white women who get ridiculously upset and meltdown over the truth being told to them

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    Nona Wolf
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    Black Karen
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Literally dying laughing at this lol

    Christiana Kitty
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Replace the word white with the word black and see if that’s offensive. Yeah.

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    #19

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm almost afraid to ask.... did this simone person break her wrist on the ice or something?

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    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She had the moral duty to ruin her health and well-being to try to win a medal because she owed it to the greatest nation in the world! America first! /s

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is he going to lose the next Olympics and not criticizing?

    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Not from that. It's from excessive woodworking. Confused? Don't worry, if you think about it it will cum to you...

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    #21

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't care! I like my poison! Cheers!

    J. F.
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would actually read this advice - never got why being drunk is considered fun

    Jessica Gunn
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, like most things, some enjoy it, some don't.

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    TheWickedOne
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Let's get smashed and drive home but no, I will not eat meat.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Vodka may not be the answer, but I'll give it a shot

    Dave van Es
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And now you know why they tell you to choose your poison when ordering a drink

    Tami
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mildly threatening strangers? What kind of paranoia is that?

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    #22

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

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    Kathi Schäffer
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just got back from vacation. Carried a book all over Ireland with me. Read two pages 😄😄😄

    Monday
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd take that as a win! Your vacation was interesting enough and you didn't need the book!

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    julie son
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love reading, but I go to the beach to swim, walk with my dog, collect rocks or shells, or simply breathe in the scenery. Why would I choose to escape that reality?

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's me! Can't concentrate especially when there are kids yelling around

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need to read books the kind you can hold in your hand with pages that have to be turned because I can learn things and I can't go anywhere!

    Crochet lady
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We go to the beach for 2 weeks every summer and before I got my kindle I used to have an entire suitcase just for the books I wanted to read.

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    #23

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm killing plants that evolved to live in the desert so that's nothing!

    Zenozenobee
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OK then, let's start a club. I'm pretty sure I could kill plastic plants

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    bryguy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It usually always boils down to too much sunlight, not enough sunlight, too much water, not enough water, or too much chemicals in city water

    Lyuben Petkov
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it is called Chloroza and the yellow leaves show it

    Jessica Gunn
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Somehow I don't think any of these stock photos were specifically made for these satire articles, but thank you just the same :) I was actually wondering what the one all the way on the right is, do you know? I've got it growing around my house

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    #24

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Jessica Gunn
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sadly true "Oh! It was different then! It was all in good fun!"

    Brian Bennett
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was molested by the bread man (ask grandma)! Father and war buddies beat the s**t out of him they even let me get in a couple of kicks guess where? No legal repercussions !

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    TheAnimalLady
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm guessing that you didn't read the article? These are all Parody, Satire. Not funny in the literal sense (& not at all if you're a victim of the "joke").

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    yeciye
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    #25

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People who say exercise is like therapy scare me😅

    iblowsheep
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    the only way exercise is therapy is if i run to my car to drive to the liquor store

    Dina Simoné
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I dont know about this one. Exercise does help a bit. Does not heal trauma, but it makes you feel a little better in the moment. Just do everything that helps a little bit in the moment and there is going to be progress.

    Tamra Stiffler
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Totally agree with this. Sometimes baby steps are the only way to address trauma. For me, at least, exercise makes me feel a little better. Sometimes that's enough.

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    Leo Domitrix
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Exercise fixes all my pysch issues!" translates to "Never seen a psych professional".

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And thus never had the experience of one explaining you should do it. It will make you feel better. Does managing to get up and walk to the door count?

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    Lucky
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It is, but autocorrect made an "e" instead of an "o"!

    Snekky
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exercise is therapy though!! Unless it’s running. I don’t like running I like karate better hmph

    Seabeast
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It definitely helps with some kinds of trauma. I felt it gave me my body back. It belonged to me, nobody else.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you cut this picture off at her shorts, nobody would believe those legs are on the same woman.

    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Physical therapy, people, PHYSICAL..................

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    #26

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Francis
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i don't like being called out like this!

    Whitney Gal
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Dude, suckin’ at something is the first step to being sorta good at something.” -Jake the Dog, “Adventure Time”

    Zophra
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    sometimes it might be the second try...

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Brainwashed here. If you can't do something right the first time, then don't bother doing it at all. Wow! What a confidence builder. I'll just sit here and do nothing. I can definitely do that right the first time.

    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Umm, what if you're clean after the first wipe? Will you go about your day with a crusty b******e?

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    That's the only sensible thing to do. if font can't do it, don't keep trying and failing.

    #27

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There is never an excuse for that

    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My wife is Asian so It's a good thing my state doesn't have a death penalty because I will NOT tolerate any hate against her. I'm vengeful. An entire family and all living ancestors will suffer my wrath if you commit a hate crime against my wife.

    Mazer
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nice deserved burn to Robert Aaron Long

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Uhh... I don't understand this one. Is asian hate crime an issue in... well, ANYwhere?

    #28

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Lauren Caswell
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never! She loves the pretty kitty ditty! She purrs in accompaniment ^-^

    Lily Mae Kitty
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    pretty sure they love their special songs!

    Eagle Girl
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ...then rolls her eyes when you blow raspberries in her tummy. Just me? ok nevermind..

    Cecily Holland
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My Bengal takes everything personally

    Uber Mensch
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You'll pay for that. Oh, how you'll pay...

    Glirpy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What song isn’t made up?

    Jessica Gunn
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Okay, "made up on the spot.." or "made up just for this kitty..."

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    #29

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Ksenia M
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    no, but he has to deal with people every day, so you know...

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ooooooooooooh this. This post deserves top placement for just this comment.

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    J. F.
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Dogs pay rent with love and not with money

    Jessica Gunn
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Dog sighing because you won't throw the ball or give treats or you're giving too much attention to the cat...

    Josie Bisbano
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, what have you ever had to sigh about?!

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    #30

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Big Blue Cat
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This! I just relized today is Thursday because of a weekly meeting I hate and I swear it was Thursday just yesterday (and this same shitty meeting)

    Henry Cheves
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just gotta get through one week until the noose arrives.

    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This week and you're condescending about it? How about people just trying to get through this DAY?

    #31

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    ShriSha Kamboj
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "therapy might change what i am" says my troubled as s

    RandomBeing
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean thats the point ain't it? to change for the better?

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    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Says woman who's personality is being depressed. Once again. Depressed is not a personality trait. It is a mental illness that tramples on your personality. Even if we look as though we're fine on the outside, we aren't on the inside. And that's what stops us from being ourselves.

    Logic and Reason
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I believe this post was referring to people who see depression as trendy due to the uptick in mental health awareness, and therefore decide on the spot that they have severe depression and talk about nothing else.

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    julie son
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hey, I take offence at that: stupidity is gender neutral! I know three people who practice that, and all three are men!

    WhatEvenIsLife
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I told myself that b.s. for years. Doing much better now on meds.

    Kim Addleton
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    #32

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Whitney Gal
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It’s called “sociological field research.”

    Glirpy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    God’s Green Earth, huh?

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I spend a lot of time doing all kinds of things even though I have but one life on God's green earth. And that life is getting shorter by the day.

    Cecily Holland
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Twitter beefs are pure entertainment

    Pungent Sauce
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Isn’t that what were all doing here my fellow Pandas?

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    #33

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    I I
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    yeay finally i get represented

    Brandy Grote
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yet they are all smiling!

    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And just who TF decides successful?

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    #34

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    PixxelDust
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    please tell me instead of just showing me the cover 😭

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Free spirit three hours after panic attack? I'm reeeeeeeeally forcing myself to hold the suicide joke in, here.

    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The two are NOT mutually inclusive. One CAN happen regardless of the other.

    #35

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's an understatement!

    Annie Myers
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Happened to me yesterday! Except it was $47.

    #36

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    BG
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poor Shutterstock model guy!

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Does the subject of this picture know his FACE is on this? I really hope he is at the very least racist, otherwise this is ... ouch

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is a look of someone totally fixated on something he sees online that is making him super irrationally pissed off.

    rspanther
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not much of a talent there.

    Craig Reynolds
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Nothing is impossible until disproven, remember that. Also, remember that somewhere out there is someone that will exceed your expectations of what's possible. Humans have a way of doing that...

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    #37

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Caro Caro
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate these things.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pretty sure we all do. Only thing these are good for is tramp stamp sales, and honestly I don't even know that for sure, I just can't think of anything else.

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    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah also high waist jeans are problematic! I don't understand why it has to be the one or the other? It's been 3 years that i quit wearing jeans because i cannot find something that suits me!! And i love jeans!

    GoddessOdd
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even when I was 18 and weighed 100 lbs, I found these uncomfortable to wear... and yet, they keep coming back. Yep, nothing like feeling as though your pants might fall down at any minute...

    Yort
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One time I saw some article about a company that was out to make bathing suits that look good on all body types, so they had a skinny woman and a fat woman, and the bathing suit looked absolutely godawful on both of them.

    Virginia W
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh the 2000s fashion must have! Super ultra low rise lol

    PixxelDust
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    not just curvy people that struggle with these things, my cereal-box self means that they would just fall off because they have nothing to hang from

    TheAnimalLady
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Aargh me too, with ALL kinds of pants even pajama pants that tie. It's ridiculous but better than being like the other women in my family. They are pear-shaped, morbidly obese bit ches...I'm soooooo glad that I take after my father. I got his "man hands" too...not very ladylike, but I can pick up a basketball with one hand. Comes in HANDY 😏😁

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    King Joffrey
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why would you even want to wear this abomination?

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    #38

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    Nicess
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poor thing. Looks like one of them birds...

    Tee Witt
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is why they used his picture, isn't that some form of discrimination?

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    Pungent Sauce
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Super Important to have a ‘trash’ email acct to hook up with sites like my dear BP (6 trackers blocked)

    #39

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It is funny because it is impossible. Your personal demons being conséquences of your actions? Lol. And what will it be, after that? Loneliness and interpersonal issues as consequences go your personality? Failure being a consequence of your lack of efforts? Don't be silly!

    #40

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Mazer
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not going to lie - Been a nature lover for decades, still see BLM and think Bureau of Land Management first.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    SEE!! I had the same thing and caught the mother of all hissyfits for it at work.

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    Leo Domitrix
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    still so sick of this. If you are against someone based on skin, creed, whatever, no, you don't get to point to your own history and say that you are jsutified in being the a**hole. Doesn't work like that. Nobody is morally pure, so stop pretending. Applies to Israel, US, UK, China, pick a nation.

    Nicky
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In Emeryville, a Yemeni UCB premed college kid got beaten up by cops for driving his OWN CAR (which had been reported stolen and reported recovered to police). They beat him up and put him in jail for 2 days before dropping charges. In this country, we treat Arab-Americans like me like 3rd class citizens. Palestinian ethnic cleansing is atrocious.

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because it only depends on whether it will make you look good on social media.

    Tina Hugh
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah, and here comes the Jew hatred. F**k you, BP

    Terran
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you think, that's a hot topic, try to discuss this in Germany or Austria.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LOL. Same for the Netherlands, my friend. Absolutely zero sympathy. Mess with the Tzahal and you're going to have a VEEERY bad day lol.

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    #41

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

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    #42

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

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    I I
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    yey you dont go girl

    April Caron
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Am I the only one who came to the comments section to find her people?

    #43

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Mohsie Supposie
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not physically busy. Emotionally busy!

    Julie C Rose
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    *Woman worked yet another 60+ hour week and decided that giving you attention wasn’t her first priority just now.

    #44

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

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    #45

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

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    #47

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes...read the room. Am I going to fit in cyber bullying or will I be called out for a differenting opinion?

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Same lady who stared at the man in the early 90s shirt.

    #48

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Glirpy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How about getting vaccinated?

    RandomBeing
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't need drugs to ac like I'm high my ADHD has got that covered lol. Drugs and alcohol don't have any appeal for me cuz I can go plenty crazy without them and all they can do is get me terribly addicted.

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    #49

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    King Joffrey
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha I used to do that as a teenager.

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Get in, loser, we're going shopping...for more god-awful sunglasses.

    Yort
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People in the comments: omg this article is so toxic and sexist. Actual item on list:

    BG
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Friend immediately starts talking over it. Trip RUINED!

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    #50

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    RandomBeing
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I'm on the receiving end of this.

    #51

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    tuzdayschild
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just keep reading books. Eventually you get over the shock of it all.

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    Mia Smith
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Books/reading material have been practically grafted to my hands since around age 3, so I have the opposite thought of " I feel weird, something's missing...oh! I'm not holding/reading a book" (The current glitch causing the number 1 at the end of comments has me itching to do this) : I tend to read multiple books simultaneously, after all, 2 books are better than

    Raven DeathShade
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I...people don't read books usually? True, I'm on my phone more than I'm reading, but I read a ton of books.

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    #53

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one should be much higher. Screw those self-righteous woke hypocrites.

    Logic and Reason
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you took part in black out Tuesday and expected something in return… then you missed the point.

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    GOD IF SANDRA POSTS ONE MORE PIC OF HER SNOT-NOSED KID....

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    #54

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Londo Cotto
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You laugh but I watched Village of the Damned . . . . . . If it's blonde and has glowy eyes, you run.

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    It is satirical, so I know it is not supposed to make sense, but it is still racist.

    #55

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had not enough self-esteem to admit it, but I have always known it deep down! Now it all makes sense!

    #56

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Monty Is Fiennes
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The dog doesn't care as long as dinner is every day...

    rspanther
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The dog knows, just isn't telling.

    Glirpy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The dog is the one with the phone

    Mazer
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The goal is inherent, to be the opportunist in life. That goal is met the minute they are born and is validated everyday

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    #57

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Martha Meyer
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What's so hard to understand about that? I don't have a single tat and I had no problem understanding.

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    #58

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Mazer
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Clams are only happy at high tide when they happily eat and are not actively being hunted (with the exception of deep sea clams who don’t experience high tide and are favored by walruses AKA clam suckers)

    Yort
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow this one especially makes all the complaints in the general comments section about this article being racist and sexist and toxic super ridiculous.

    Glirpy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That clam doesn’t look alive

    #59

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Nicess
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes all of the above

    I I
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    $8 poorer and a headache in a few hours

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Coffee: Russian Roulette for your insides head to toe.

    #60

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Nicess
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    If they know how to code, you know what to do.

    J. F.
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Give them pizza and caffein so they can transform those ingredients into software?

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    #61

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Man goes through 6 majors before deciding to work for his parents

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    #62

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please please please. Stop going on Tik Tok and looking at pictures of people who are trying to show the world how beautiful they are because their egos need that kind of reinforcement. That is easier said than done, I know. But you are not doing yourself any favors. Check out my comment below because I believed I was. I dont know your life. Things may be going on from other places that reinforce what you believe. We look in that mirror mirror on the wall with preconceived notions. DO NOT pay attention to Ryan below. He. Is. Wrong. Read the question this way if it helps. Are you really ugly, or do you think you are because you looked at another 17 year old on Tik Tok and compared yourself?

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    Dina Simoné
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Everyone on tiktok uses filters. Even if they are gorgeous. This should be illegal.

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    People who think they are ugly are ugly, they know better than others about their own body and they don't need reassuring condescending lies.

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not true. In my younger years I thought I was ugly. Oh so ugly. Friends told me I wasn't. I thought they were lying just to make me feel better. Hindsight can actually be 20/20. I look back on pictures from those years, and you know what? Hot damn! I was not ugly by any means. I was very pretty. In some pictures, downright beautiful. I wish I had realized, believed it at the time rather than in retrospect. My friends weren't lying. They were telling me the truth. For many people it is very difficult to accept the truth, even when it's a good truth.

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    #63

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Shishal Asaurus
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Amelia? I wondered where u had gotten off to....

    tuzdayschild
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Amelia Bedelia had it all figured out 50 years ago.

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Some are not only still employed, but have made it all the way to upper management.

    Mtownmick
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is a milestone. Usually reserved only for white males. Wonder if she got promoted?

    Bender Bending Rodríguez
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am not a white male but I have to say this, you should replace "white males" with "brown nosers" to make your statement accurate AF. Brown nosers gets far regardless of race, gender, sex, religion and competence.

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    #64

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    I I
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well it was 2 spliffs and a bong until i read this , back to the bong we go

    Fish Boden
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Best wishes on finding that magical formula.

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    #65

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

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    #66

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Pat Bond
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not really sure what his ethnicity has to do with it.

    Katchen
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Recently there were a bunch of white celebrities who all talked about how they infrequently shower. The three things they had in common: they were white, they were celebrities, they bathe less frequently than everyone posting on black Twitter.

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    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Correction: just plain ol' celebrity.

    rspanther
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As long as they stay downwind.

    Londo Cotto
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good god . . . . .how hard is it to have a damned shower . .the guy can afford to have someone shower him FFS . . . .I would, I'd hire someone to cart around a portable shower and three outfit changes . . . . You wash EVERY DAY . . . . . This is why Aliens avoid us.

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Because the black ones don't need to come out as stinky since everyone already knows they stink? that's horribly racist!

    Katchen
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I forgot! In addition to the white celebrities saying they don’t shower often, there was a whole hygiene thing about leg washing on Twitter: https://mobile.twitter.com/yashar/status/1129130284690153475?lang=en

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    #67

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Mtownmick
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are girls in poor countries all over the world that do the same with no recognition.

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    #69

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    *shrugs* I am just a free spirit who travels and takes pics for my Insta and that's how I make my money. Hard work balancing this ait in my hands.

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    #70

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    #71

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Lucky
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All things worth to be done are worth to be poorly done....

    #72

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm gonna throw this plant out of the window I am so pissed off.

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just because you can't keep a plant alive does not mean you're a bad person.

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    #73

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Lauren Caswell
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Doc and Marty? Great Scott, that's heavy!

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    #74

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Dina Simoné
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was good, but I dont get the hype?

    #75

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Londo Cotto
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "waiting for the cvs employee to unlock the deodorant": I don't understand this sentence at all . . . . . Deodorant is locked away?

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes it is. But only in "certain" neighborhoods. 😠

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    Glirpy
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    5 Ed Sheehan songs that make you feel like committing suicide at CVS

    #76

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Andrew Gibb
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    woman patronising the unplugged photocopier

    Paradise
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The office comedian "Yeah, I named ths copy machine Bob, because it's constantly Jammin" (replace with Ben, also acceptable)

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    #79

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Then maybe it is because you were not clear enough?

    Glirpy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was manifest destiny

    #80

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did anyone ever date in high school, anyway?

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    #81

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

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    #82

    Funny-Fake-Headlines-Reductress

    reductress Report

    earringnut
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sit properly and we won't have an issue with you.