This Instagram Account Posts Punny Jokes And It’s Every Dad’s Internet Heaven (30 New Pics)

I don't know, we have our own issues in Canada. We are not exactly mess free here.

It took me way too long to figure out what the joke was here, cause it's just true. I genuinely just knew (as a Canadian) that it was talking about the US by the second comma

Hear, hear!

that's how they trained them ...

same can be said abt mexico, its shitty, especially with amlo

Took me a while but I got it

Funny what kids can remember, at the most inopportune moments. (I am childless Yahoo!)

took me a minute but that’s pretty good

Not Gary that's for sure.

oh I love this

bahaha I love it

*snorts out coffee*

I hope he didn’t have to screw the whole cabinet to hold it together

And then meatballs for lunch

With a 15 cent Allen wrench

Norah Reilly

Norah Reilly

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Again, OUCH.

We are the Champions, my friend 👍😉

That's a great comeback!

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landside, No escape from reality Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see, I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy, Because I'm easy come, easy go, Little high, little low, Any way the wind blows doesn't really matter to Me, to me Mamaaa, Just killed a man, Put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger, Now he's dead Mamaaa, life had just begun, But now I've gone and thrown it all away Mama, oooh, Didn't mean to make you cry, If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, Carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters Too late, my time has come, Sends shivers down my spine, body's aching all The time Goodbye, everybody, I've got to go, Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth Mama, oooh I don't want to die, I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all. I see a little silhouetto of a man, Scaramouch, Scaramouch, will you do the Fandango! Thunderbolts and lightning, very, very frightening me Galileo, Galileo Galileo, Galileo Ga

Dayum! Brutal! ;)

Well at least you didn't need bail money!

Oof!

In German, it's both a "travel chair" and an "up train".

that brought me up

I overheard two older women talking about the new building one of them had just moved into. "Is there a lift?" "No, there's an elevator that takes you right up." They went back and forth like this for quite a while, not realizing that they were both talking about the same thing. lol

Vocabulary differences on another level. And another. And another....

Every time I hear this ad slogan I think of the feminine pads that have " wings". Not the same thing at all.

I did that once... for about 2 hours I could smell colors and hear numbers...

good thing he didnt hit a building and then remember he didnt have his car

Got me to chuckle.

Red Bull gives you wiiings

I pray for more jokes like these.

i tought al capone said this

But you survived

I had the ghost of my cat wake me this morning. And because said ghost was still inhabiting the living body of my cat, I had to get out of bed and feed her :3

Hope he can see...somebody new, and that he's not that chained little person.

Gloria Gaynor isn't dead!