Breaking news! There’s something strange happening in your area! We will report on it to the best of our abilities, but don’t be alarmed if there are a few typos we later have to correct. The important thing is that we will use crazy news headlines to grab your attention and go viral on Twitter. We will keep you updated on the story, but for now, that’s all. We now return to your regularly scheduled programming.
We all know there are always weird things happening worldwide, and many of them make the headlines. We’ve all come across the funny Florida man headlines, right? The oddest part is that the titles catch your attention even if the news isn’t particularly interesting. This might be because they have typos, focus on uncommon issues, or are unrescuable mental headlines.
For your entertainment, pandas, we’ve taken a trip through the feed of the ‘Crap Local News’ Twitter account. They share the most hilarious typo corrections and funniest news headlines. We were also lucky enough to interview Scotty Horsman, who hosts the ‘What a Weird Week’ podcast.
Don’t forget to upvote the pics you can’t believe are real. Feel free to share any hilarious headlines you’ve read in the comments below.
This post may include affiliate links.
The answer may be 'yes', considering the behavior of a great percentage of those who claims to be christian...
I get so tired of the slams against Christianity. People are so quick to assume that all Christians are jerks or ignorant. It just gets old. But what I do find fascinating is that you never hear broad-based slams against other religions even though every religion has just as many poorly behaved people in them. Why is Christianity the one with a bullseye on its back? Why is believing in Jesus Christ such a contentious topic versus other religions that worship a different version of deity?
This Twitter Account Urges People to Enjoy More Funny News Headlines
Watching or reading the news can be an upsetting experience. Sometimes, it feels like the only things being reported are tragedies and atrocities. Don’t get us wrong; it’s essential to be aware of current events, but every now and then, it’s refreshing to read ridiculous headlines and laugh out loud. And that’s what the Crap Local News Twitter account is all about.
The account mainly focuses on funny UK headlines, but they don’t discriminate. Their bio notes that they share local news stories from “beyond” as well. But one thing that their posts show is that headlines can have quite an impact on audiences. Some people might get swayed and influenced by the attention-grabbing titles without understanding the story’s context. It is important to note how much power a headline can hold.
And who bets he will blame the gays next door for this? Or claims it happened because he wasn't fighting sin hard enough?
If bad stuff happens to Christians, it's just God "testing" them. So likely, no, he wouldn't see it as punishment for himself at all.
Load More Replies...Went bowling this weekend. My kid accidentally used a ball of the people who were using the same rack thing as us. The woman was a b****about it snd said something to my husband. Dhe immediately stomped over to bowl and slung her ball behind her. Instant karma. She recognized it too. She said that happened to her because she was being ugly to us. She apologized and kinda backed away nervously.
Load More Replies...Probably a really bad joke, but the thief had that mentality I did as a kid in church. This isn't funny but because I can't laugh it's now the funniest thing I've ever heard
Load More Replies...That would be me. I used to try to hide and my wife would yell “giggle” and I’d snicker. I can’t help it.
alternatively, just mispronounce GIF while you walk around your house.
This is why journalism is considered dead. Any real journalist would have found out what the joke was and included it!
tats creepy. imagine hearing laughter upstairs in your house~Annabell....Is that you?
Shyla, yes it did; pot holes filled within 24 hours 👍👍
Load More Replies...Effective. Excellent. Exhausting though, to draw all those on every single hole in the ground.
"Now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall" 🎶
Load More Replies...University police should start calling out "marco". You know one would not resist saying "polo" back.
Well… I could yell ‘Polo’ and then teleport to another place ;)
Load More Replies...We used to read the uni police reports (same school) when I went there. My favorite: "University police respond to reports of a disturbance caused by a group of individuals dressed as ninjas. When the police arrived the group threw a smoke bomb on the ground and disappeared."
Load More Replies...No joke, I support this statement. I don't even want that man's name to be more than a footnote in my kids history studies. Don't give him any more fame
Load More Replies...Class: Insecta; Family: Saturniidae; Species: Covfeptera
Load More Replies...Bigger than the Washington monument
Load More Replies...What could an entire species of moth have done to deserve that???
How did they find out that wearing a duck suit would make her feel better about life?
I want to know how did they figure this out? I mean, was the goat acting anxious and Barb says "you know what might help Polly's anxiety? A blanket!" And Greg is like "I don't think so, what about a sweater?" But both dont seem quite right so they stop to think, and then 🧠 💡!! simultaneously "A DUCK COSTUME!!!"
that's actually really close! polly's anxiety was soothed by being swaddled in blankets, but the blankets would fall off when she stood up & she would get really anxious again. so when halloween came & her owner/mom saw the costume, she thought it would be perfect for polly & it was!
Load More Replies...Hey, if we all know about the wolf in sheep's skin, what's wrong about a goat in duck's skin?!
Haha. Had to go back and see. Agreed. More about the other one, please!
Load More Replies...I love all of you Pandas that were more concerned about the kitten, lol! Twitter can burn to the ground, but this place must survive for my mental health alone.
What the fuuck?!? Kitty rectums? I want to know what newspaper this is - I need to subscribe.
They forgot to censor your r****m! I mean, the one on your comment!😅
Load More Replies...Breaking news: BP censors the word r****m (yes, R-E-C-T-U-M)
Charlie Chaplin came in third in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest.
Would love to have seen how it all played out when everyone realized. Hoping there was a lot of laughter.
Load More Replies...She was part of the hide and seek from the other story? Hide in plain site?
The Interesting Impact of a Headline
When you enjoy these funny breaking news headlines, it might not feel like they can drastically sway your opinion. But these news titles are more powerful than we could imagine. We consulted an article titled The Current State of News Headlines by research associates Joshua Scacco and Ashley Muddiman. The report examined the implications of crazy Internet headlines and how people select which story to read based on the flashiest title.
One point that Scacco and Muddiman raise is that the type of titles a news source uses impacts how their readers rate their credibility. Traditional news has to compete with digital and entertainment-focused sources. Due to this, they also move away from using standard titles, and you might see more funny newspaper headlines. Ultimately, this might make you question the reliability of traditional media.
There's a joke from the '60's about a guy had a dog named Sex. Dog ran away one night, so the guy's in the park. Police stopped him, asked what he was doing. He said he was looking for sex.
So… will I get arrested for yelling ‘Mint, come here!’ To look for my Westie dog?
Load More Replies...Years ago we had an elderly neighbor lady who would step out her back door every evening and yell "Snip Snip!" over and over. We thought she was batty. Turns out she was calling her cat, a neutered male whom she'd named Snip Snip. Turned out she was a fantastically fun person with a wicked sense of humor. The cat was cool too.
How are peanut chocolate bars racist? It's not as if he was shouting 'Bournville' or 'Milky Bar' ..
This got me real good. nearly had my tea out my nose, the laugh caught me by surprise.
Great, spat out my coffee and nearly dropped my phone...... That is fkn hilarious!!!
Spelling - pouffe not poof. I apologise to the world on behalf of Brits who can't spell and cause a newspaper to have to clarify something so basic. For the non Brit speaking, a pouffe is a footrest at the bottom of your armchair.
If I was Mr. McArthur, I probably wouldn't have been bothered by the original article. It's the fact that they felt a clarification was necessary that would have embarrassed me.
it's clarifying that an article published last week, which said "an old pouffe started a fire" was referring to a pouffe as in the furniture (like an ottoman), not calling Mr MacArthur an "old pouffe"
Load More Replies...I shouldn't be laughing, but the last bit is such a dumb asss thing to say. This was his takeaway, after 19 years of being bamboozled?
Oh, but the important question is, were you born one? Because this totally seems to be the key, you know.
Load More Replies...I am a cis woman having considerable difficulties with ironing. How can I contact this gentleman to have him explain what the source of my problem is?
I'm currently reconsidering my gender based on my inability to iron. Of all the things
Load More Replies...When I was in my twenties, I was visiting my family and asked my younger sister to iron something for me. She said, "Why don't you iron it yourself?" I replied, "Because I don't know how to iron." She looked at me for about five seconds and said, "Michael, you taught me how to iron." Whoops, yes I did. Busted.
No wonder he couldn't figure it out for two decades if he identifies women by "can iron = woman, can't iron = man".
To be fair, it's very hard to tell the difference in any other way.
Load More Replies...This "Belgian man" was a complete piece of work. https://www.ndtv.com/world-news/after-19-years-belgian-finds-out-his-wife-was-a-man-505657/amp/1#amp_tf=From%20%251%24s&aoh=16684837227243&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com.
Unfortunately, few will see the retraction and forever think this guy is on drugs. This is how it starts.
Reporter: Boss, are you sure we have to print the retraction? Editor: Yes. We can prove the drummer is on drums...
The typist was on drums to think that Lyday was on drugs. 🤯
Load More Replies...John Barber on the drugs, ladies and gentlemen, let's give him a big hand!!
I googled this to see this mushroom...I recommend you do so if you are also interested, it's pretty dead on.
Owl believe it when I see it. Where's our coat-wearing trio? Surely they could put this in perspective for us.
Owls: How many licks until we get to the center of the mushroom? Oh boy......
They used to literally. The Catholic Church used to sell "indulgences" which were like carbon credits, but for your sins. Buy enough and you could erase all your sins and go straight to heaven.
Load More Replies...It may have been proven false, but can we still give some sort of prize to the writer who came up with the scenario of meeting Jesus behind a KFC, who told them to sell tickets to raise money to pay an alien named Stevie to take them to a planet made entirely of drugs?
Load More Replies...I don't see how this is any different to any religion with a belief in an afterlife. After all, people attend church as their ticket to heaven.
And are expected to tithe 10% of their income to many of the churches, especially evangelical cults.
Load More Replies...Noooo, parrots are social animals. Just include a sign that says "parrots may use offensive language" by the exhibit.
No, teach one of the parrots to give a psa about offensive language. Incidentally, my brother and I were often separated in public for similar reasons.
Load More Replies...May you give me the link? I love birds, and all the funny things they do. It is okay if you don't have it.
Load More Replies...When I was a kid the local zoo had a macaw who was kept loose (I presume his wings were clipped.) I watched him get up on the roof of the other bird areas which wasn't particularly high. He walked across to where a woman was looking into one cage. He got to the edge and made like he was going for the woman, scaring her, then stood there and laughed. Never underestimate a parrot
It's always the grey parrots ... I think we need a parrot expert to confirm these are the naughtiest birbs <3
Well, he might have asked but clearly the journalist didn't agree to the request
I'm going to let the roof bear have all the cupcakes it wants. Just saying.
Only the best birthday story that NO ONE will believe! I once had my 8th Birthday Party and a bear crashed through the ceiling and ate all the cupcakes ... yeah, sure.
Yogi was always looking for a Pic-a-nic basket. Dragging BooBoo into his shenanigans.
Load More Replies...Yes, don't call social services before proper explanations.
Load More Replies...The spider phoned the Police as it said it's his home and the man was trying to throw a chair at him :)
I think the spider. The police laughed, checked for an injured party (the report mentioned a woman screaming hysterically, which turned out to be the bloke himself) then the officers left. The details of the conversation make a fun read. https://www.fox5atlanta.com/news/police-called-to-domestic-dispute-only-to-find-man-screaming-at-spider
Load More Replies...I walked out on my back porch one evening and found a web with a very large, strange spider in it. Didn't have bug spray so I grabbed some kid of cleaning foam and blasted the daylights out of it. It fell off the web, still moving. As I stomped on it I was yelling at the top of my lungs "Die, DIE, you *****!!!!!@@@@@!!!!!. I lived in townhouses at the time that were all connected. Nobody even poked their heads out to see what was going on. I guess it's fortunate that nobody called the police either but that in itself was worrisome when I thought about it later.
Why would you hurt it? It wasnt bothering you. Poor poor spider
Load More Replies...How Can Traditional Media Compete With These Offbeat News Headlines?
It is understandable why even traditional news outlets would want to sensationalize their titles to get more clicks, but that’s how we end up with the worst newspaper headlines. They shouldn’t stray too far from their goals just to grab attention. Scacco and Muddiman note that some of the functions headlines can serve are “story summarization, interest generation, immediacy satisfaction, and attention direction.”
If the title has summarized the story, readers will click or continue to read if they’re interested in what happened. If a source wants to generate interest in a story, they should avoid using “flat headlines” and get creative. Using puns, wordplay, alliterations, or other literary devices can be a great way to build interest. A flashy headline can also be paired with photos or multimedia elements to attract viewers.
ohh look BP missed to censor that "word! in small corner print! Getting sloppy, are yaa BP!!!
I bet the birthday child didn’t care and that’s what counts, right? Also, was she expecting a real unicorn to show up?
Next time, maybe don’t order your unicorn from a place that advertises they do bachelor parties!
Gives a whole new meaning at the party when they start offering "donkey rides"
Why the hell did you just make me snort out coffee from my nose :) AHAHAHA snort snort
Load More Replies...Now the poor fellow is on the automated government watch list forever.
We have Zhan Beleniuk champion of Greco-Catholic wrestling instead of Greco-Roman wrestling
I think it's the food safety issue they are thinking of. Plus if they adopt the cat shoppers might decide that it means they can take their own pets to the store with them. I can see having cats at say a library is really cute but otherwise probably not. From having had cats at home their fur gets everywhere lol. Same as having long hair I find my hair everywhere and always have to triple check if a hair has fallen into whatever I'm cooking
Load More Replies...I'm reading the story above the stats, it looks like they're coming sooner than they think
'Oh no they're Knott.' (Apparently Knott was not wearing a seatbelt.)
Load More Replies...One of the Seattle papers years ago had a note on the obituary page, words to the effect: "There were so many deaths reported this week that they are continued in the Amusements Section."
Always wondering why the grandkids never thanked him for the birthday checks.
I was just going to say this.😆 Poor old bean must've thought the grandkids were miserable little crumbsnatchers for not giving any thanks.
Load More Replies...I’ll just leave it here… 6CFA7047-3...f-jpeg.jpg
Not only didn't see it coming, he's amazed he is still alive. Really deficient psychic ability there
Might need to eat with a few dozen prunes to be safe and unclogged.
Load More Replies...Wait, it was supposed to be a salsa?! I thought they were spicy rock cakes!
My wife too. We learned that after I spent all day working on a dinner for our first anniversary. She thought it was funny, I was heart broken feeling like I failed at a romantic gesture
Load More Replies...This Podcast Covers Strange News Stories
To learn more about odd news, we contacted Scotty Horsman, the host of the ‘What a Weird Week’ podcast. First, we wanted to know what inspired Scotty to start such an unusual show centered around weird news.
“Fame and fortune, of course,” he told Bored Panda jokingly. “But also, my podcast is basically a ripoff of the old and wonderfully weird ‘Ripley’s Believe or Not’ radio feature. Did I say ripoff? I meant an homage. Oops.” Whatever he wants to call it, it’s certainly entertaining! His show highlights the funny TV news headlines and newspaper stories that you can't believe were published. Some are about events like mystery moon crashes, grilled cheese sandwich art, and Mariah Carey being sued for song thievery.
Why Are People So Captivated by Strange News?
“It’s terrific when you hear a story that seems absolutely bonkers and find yourself thinking—I guess anything’s possible!” he told Bored Panda.
How Does He Decide What to Feature on the Podcast?
He has a few requirements for the news stories he shares with listeners—not too saucy, not too deep, and interesting enough to tell his wife about at the supper table. When it comes to where he finds these weird news stories to share, he told us that they come from many sources. “But if you only had Twitter and Reddit, you’d have enough content for decades,” he added.
What Are His Favorite Topics to Discuss on the Show?
“I love all the weird food stories,” he shared. “When a restaurant chain introduces a fried chicken wine, that’s making the show for sure! Imagine the team of marketers who sat around tweaking that idea.” Scotty added that this may not have happened yet, but he expects it any day now.
You call that pothole? I think we need a post where all Panda's share the images of pothole they got in their country!
Well if that's a pothole, some of the potholes in eastern Australia after the flooding deserve a 3-day banquet.
They got it wrong...I've been lead to believe you're supposed to draw a penis around it
Well, that cake or what ever that is, is shaped like a penis. 😂😂😂
Load More Replies...This reminds me of that Seinfeld episode with George Costanza being chased down the sidewalk on his mobility scooter by a bunch of elderly on their scooters.
The creator of the headline really said "I've only got one chance to use this."
Love it! Old folks driving around on mobility scooters, and instead of guns, they'd be throwing cottage pies and tins of cat food🤣🤣🤣
Load More Replies...First of all it’s a Shawerma second of all he has i beard that looks like a beard.
In the UK it's called a Doner Kebab and as this is from a British paper it's called a kebab. The chip shop owner slices bits off and fills a pitta bread up with it and adds salad and a sauce such as sweet chilli, garlic mayo, mint or lemon juice. I prefer mine with no sauce
Load More Replies...Slice bits off of Kebab Bob there, I'll have some with cucumber and mint sauce
Headline writer missed a golden opportunity: "Chicken gangs run aFOWL of the law"
Private: "Sir, the chicken gang problem, is getting way out of hand." Sergeant sighs: "Send in Colonel Sanders."
I'd say off with their heads, but everyone knows the phrase "running around like chickens with their heads cut off ".
As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a goodfeather.
There was a different headline to this where they thought this was an exotic bird.
This was in Newport, south Wales and made it onto Mark Steel's in Town. https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m001c65f
Glad to see they didn't show his face, because he would be ridiculed by other seagulls if they knew it was Bob.
Would seagull masala taste different than chicken masala? Asking for a friend...
John is awake! - John: Shut up and give me that motherf*cking camembert and brie, bi*ch, and some of that slutty Swiss cheese with holes.
"...slutty Swiss cheese..."? Where's your deli? A porn shop? I love that bit!
Load More Replies...So every night i go into coma and come out of it at next morning ?
This adds a whole new dimension to the Monty Python cheese skit. We should get Caro Caro's expert opinion on the situation.
not intended for pregnant woman or people with heart diseases... symptoms may include projectile vomiting, loss of will to live, and migraines for anyone under 45
Load More Replies...Better than Khayytlyynn or Kevynn or all those other monstrosities people nowaday invent out there and decorate with too many Ys, Zs and Xs
Wonder what would happen if she met a guy named Mahnettot later in life and started dating him? XP
There would be a rematch, and then they'll produce their own football team.
Load More Replies...Harry Potter meets Lord of the Rings. The rings were stolen by Gowllum
You saying the lesbian needs to get some nuts?
Load More Replies...Wait a damned minute - are those pictures of the perpetrators? I wanna see what kind of riff raff causes such a commotion in, of all places, a gay bar. Gay bars are some of the happiest places on earth and shouldn't be sullied like this. (And before I get down voted or reported, I'm serious about gay bars being the happiest places on earth - my most favorite birthday was in a gay bar on Halloween).
Wait a minute - what are you saying about heterosexual bars? Wait a (further) minute - did I just accuse someone of being heterophobic?
Load More Replies...At least the peanuts in the Snickers weren’t assaulted
Load More Replies...after calling the cops about a injured owl that was really a mushroom that she used halfway after drinking too much and stealng a boat and yelling she was jack sparrow.
Hmphff! When Lady Godiva does it in Coventry she's considered an absolute legend but poor Natasha tries it in Woking and she's a 'mess'??! Such ridiculous double standards. /s
Load More Replies...I'm thinking she needs help more than anything. Being Santa's daughter has been really hard on her, she has every reason to act out. Watching him spend all his time making children around the world feel loved and special, but he never had time for her. Heartbreaking really.
This movie, specifically. I love the understatement.
Load More Replies...Oh she is well worth this link lol ..... https://www.getsurrey.co.uk/news/surrey-news/your-life-mess-woman-jailed-14091103
I'm wondering about whomever had sex with her. What prompted him? Why wasn't he arrested?
Wow. Now she had an eventful day. I just feel lazy compared to that description.
He's got more chins than a Hong Kong telephone book.
Load More Replies...Biscuits are a basic human right, he had every right to spend the money!
Maybe he's telling the truth. Maybe he got the mashed potatoes instead.
No he dropped by the KFC to get his golden ticket to heaven and meet Stevie
Without ever seeing this man in my life I know exactly what he sounds like and I automatically read the headline in his stern British voice
Judging by the story referring to him as "man", he was correct and fatty didn't catch him.
The "Lenders" making up for the borrowers...
Load More Replies...I feel like people should start doing this, to no one in particular, all the time everywhere. For absolutely no reason whatsoever.
Reuse, recycle, repurpose those school projects!
Load More Replies...Don't forget the chicken's family. Their loved one was unalived for nothing.
Load More Replies...Yeah if that's a floor and not a pavement I think we have a bigger problem here
Load More Replies...Thankfully, the firefighters arrived and though it wasn't their area of expertise, they confirmed that the cow was using the chair wrong. The coastguard is on the way now to verify this initial assessment. Mountain rescue are on standby. International rescue are also readying Thunderbird 2 and are said to have packed a saw, which at this early stage seems a bit like overkill.
I'm not surprised in certain parts of Northamptonshire (I live here) but more surprised it wasn't in Milton Keynes
As I've always said, "If you can't shoot it or arrest it call the fire department."
Please bear in mind that it was funny in the 70s..
Load More Replies...I know you're right! Such a pressing matter. It'd be interesting to know what page it ranked in the paper, and just what else is considered newsworthy reports 🤔. The town my mother moved to in the early 90's used to report on who visited with whom throughout the week and especially on Sunday after church. It was a very detailed gossip column. Similar to Lady Whistledown but not quite as scandalous.
Load More Replies...Was this local man my daughter? Last night she had a meltdown that her sister stole her new book. She had us all looking all over for the book, and her sister crying her innocence. In fairness, we didn't believe the sister stole the book, and I assumed it was just misplaced. When my daughter got into bed that night, the book was under her pillow. Where she had placed it, so her sister wouldn't see it.
Rather see this than in some countries where shooting are such a normality that they don't make the news anymore
Today, whilst reading a story on the popular internet site, “Bored Panda,” a man thought the story was going to be funny but upon reaching the end discovered that it was not.
I completely agree. I absolutely can not be responsible for anything that I do if/ when I should become covered in spiders. All logic and humility goes out the window in that instance, lol 😆.
Load More Replies...Child's mother: This isn't what I meant when I booked Spiderman as the entertainment.
Was that the same party the bear crashed through the sky-lite ? Spiders get some cake too ?
Mom: “Children we have a special birthday party guest… Spider-Man!” Kids: “HOORA… AAAAAAAAGGGHH!” MOM: “Dave wtf?”
I don't remember a Noel on Shameless, but the rest checks out
Where I live people often go through the bins for returnable bottles. These are usually people whose income is not enough to live on. That was my first thought when I read that headline, so I find the picture with those young men pointing at the poor guy and obviously enjoying themselves quite repulsive.
Exactly. Getting stuck like that could happen to anyone, except the people laughing have not been that poor to have to search trash bins, so they make fun of that guy
Load More Replies...Yes, you can almost hear him laughing and taunting
Load More Replies...I am missing a recent German headline about the man who whacked a woman with a dead seagull, exposed himself and then tried to escape police by swimming across a lake.
I forgot to add that he kicked her dog and that the police came in legion, inculding a helicopter. Talking about escalation...
Load More Replies...Which Odd News Headline Shocked You the Most?
Did these photos make you want to watch the news, or do they make you want to facepalm? We hope you enjoyed these crazy news titles we can’t believe were published. Let us know in the comments which one made you do a double-take. Don’t forget to share absurd headlines from your local news. To keep the ball rolling, here are some big newspaper corrections that will make you regret having eyes.
The noodles were told a hot pan of chips was showing up for them shortly.
Holy s**t. The outrage is f*****g palpable. It's like I can feel their anger through the screen.
The man is so outraged he nearly fainted there
Load More Replies...God damnit! You stole my line! Shoulda woke up earlier.
Load More Replies...These stories are a wonderful microcosm of the British/American culture. Grass clipping outrage for the British and Meth head heaven con artists in cahoots with Jesus and Aliens doing business behind a KFC Americans.
1 sec to tidy it up urself r make a show of urself in a newspaper, ummmm wat to do 🤦♀️
Courageous stand, publicly calling out the Council over this travesty. Heroes!
I've seen this one before and I tried to send it into a private chat with my friend, instead sent it in a group with 70+ people from my grade 😅😄
Congratulations on this one. Everyone should have a hobby they can succeed in.
oh ya well I stuck 75.........THOUSAND. ha beat that old man😎
Yeah, I mean how many trumpets does a person even own?
Load More Replies...I guess you could call her a treblemaker....I'll see myself out
please stay and continue with the jokes
Load More Replies...Supermarket car parks are full of scandal, I saw someone park in the parent and child bay, but it was just two adult women.
Entitled pricks! I rarely go to the store because I use a cane and walking is pretty painful, but I always put the cart in the rack. It's like an unwritten social contract. I want all shopping carts on radio control so the employee whose turn it is to police the lot can repeatedly ram the customer's abandoned cart into their car. But really, have you notice that there are no cart return racks anywhere near the handicap spots? It does me no good to park close to the store if I have to walk half the length of the parking lot to return the cart. Thank You. Carry on.
Load More Replies...Ooooh! Wait until the Shopping Trolley Wide Boys realize they left one behind! Never get drunk at a shopping Trolley Rally. Things tend to get a bit wild
I happen to live in Taunton, I feel I need to investigate this story & report back, photos to follow if the masterpiece is still there ;)
magician is distraught, but rabbit does not carrot all
Load More Replies...I'm myself pretty perv, but this... I hope you clean yourself pretty good before touching anyone or anything else...
he was still wearing it as he walked out of the store....... without paying
... Man walked out of a store with a hat on his head.
Load More Replies...Way too many of these have come from the UK. When did we become Florida Man?!
Hate to say it but we were here before Florida Man. UK local news is just batshit insane
Load More Replies...I lost the clipping in a fire, but my absolute favorite story was in our local newspaper sometime in the late ‘90s. It told the story of a man taken to the ER after shooting himself in the foot. Not once. Three times, with 3 different guns, same foot. He said he’d been cleaning his .22 when it discharged into his foot. He said it “stung”. But, he kept on and started to clean his .38. It fired into the same foot. That one “kind of hurt”, so he took a bit of a break before starting to clean his .45. THAT one hurt badly enough he called 911. He swore to the responding officers that he thought they were unloaded. The final sentence in the article noted dryly that “Police said they believed that alcohol consumption may have played a part.” . . . Gee, I wonder whatever gave them that idea.
Good lord, I haven't had such a laugh in days. Well done bored panda you've done good today 👍👍
No unless you're a main character of the story. I'm sorry for you. ;-)
Load More Replies...Way too many of these have come from the UK. When did we become Florida Man?!
Hate to say it but we were here before Florida Man. UK local news is just batshit insane
Load More Replies...I lost the clipping in a fire, but my absolute favorite story was in our local newspaper sometime in the late ‘90s. It told the story of a man taken to the ER after shooting himself in the foot. Not once. Three times, with 3 different guns, same foot. He said he’d been cleaning his .22 when it discharged into his foot. He said it “stung”. But, he kept on and started to clean his .38. It fired into the same foot. That one “kind of hurt”, so he took a bit of a break before starting to clean his .45. THAT one hurt badly enough he called 911. He swore to the responding officers that he thought they were unloaded. The final sentence in the article noted dryly that “Police said they believed that alcohol consumption may have played a part.” . . . Gee, I wonder whatever gave them that idea.
Good lord, I haven't had such a laugh in days. Well done bored panda you've done good today 👍👍
No unless you're a main character of the story. I'm sorry for you. ;-)
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