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I'm a cartoonist who dreams of one day being in The New Yorker. It's near impossible, but hope springs eternal. Here are more of my rejected efforts.

I'd still be making these New Yorker cartoons regardless of the outcome because it seems I don't know any better. This has created an interesting situation; forcing me to examine (and reexamine) my reasons for trying out for the "show". Turns out; I love cartooning more than I thought. So, scribbling and searching out the absurd is, in my humble opinion, an excellent way to spend a few hours each day.

If you enjoy my illustrations, check out my previous post here on Bored Panda.

More info: johnart.org

#1

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Richard Orlin
Community Member
3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

#14 says it all: try to be funnier. None of these are.

Vladimir Paperny
Community Member
3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I understand why all these were rejected. One minor flaw, they are not funny.

The average cartoon from concept to completion usually takes 1 to 2 hours. Of course, there are exceptions where either the concept comes very quickly, or the gag isn’t being delivered as well as it could be. Sometimes it takes a few days to get the idea right.

I don’t have any personal favorites. I’d say that I’m more interested in creating consistently well-executed cartoons. Spending a little extra time on draftsmanship and clear ideas is what I strive to do. My favorites are the cartoons where I drew well and had a simple, understandable gag.

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    #3

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    best turtle
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    was that during the wedding or before the marriage?

    Nicole A
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If she was a bridezilla, it was way before the wedding.

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    Littlemiss
    Community Member
    Premium
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    According to my husband there's three rings of matrimony. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. After 10 years we still haven't hit the last one, I keep telling him to give it time.

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    I tend to work on cartoons in batches. I’ll go to my local coffee shop with a pad and paper. Sometimes I’ll take my 18-year-old daughter with me and test out ideas on her. I think some of my best cartoons come from her input. I write down concepts in a rough list. I’ll make notes of how I’d like to draw the idea and what seems to be the funniest way to execute it.

    I try to get at least 10 strong ideas down on paper before I ever think about real sketching. Once I feel committed to an idea/gag, I’ll sketch a bit and get the concept and background ironed out. I like to keep my sketches very loose, so I don’t lose any spontaneity during the inking phase. Ideally, I strive to execute 10 (or more) strong ideas per week.

    #4

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    Gogeta Blue
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is just my mind, but it looks wrong

    Alexander Smith
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If your mind was right that would be a reason why tigers were born.

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    Some days I just don’t feel funny or have the juice to find absurdity in what’s going on around me. There are times I must force myself to sit down with my pad of paper and start kicking around ideas. Consistency is key. If I do it every day, I’ll have more to show for my effort. Even if my list of ideas is weak, the exercise still makes me better. I admire anyone who can do this well. For me, it ebbs and flows.

    I think spending too much time honing a unique style can get in the way of productivity. Not that it should be ignored, but executing a well-drawn, conceptual cartoon should be the focus. Style usually comes on its own once the artist commits to creating on a regular basis.

    #6

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    Gabriel Johnson
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The point of sliced bread being the greatest thing is that it is machine sliced in equal segments so that what is shown in the illustration is unnecessary.

    Camilo Is best
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    SLICED BREAD WAS INVENTED WHEN GOD FED THE 5,000. IT IS MY THEORY THAT I MADE WHEN I WAS 7

    Chich
    Community Member
    3 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Naw, I know something better.

    #7

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    Mary Rose Kent
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is a very sophisticated gambit for a child!

    Ranboozled
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I WaNt It NoW!!!!!!"- Veruca Salt

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    As for the future, I’d like to continue getting published. The New Yorker would still be a nice get. Of course, that requires quantity and consistency. Two things I work very hard at. I’m working on three children’s books at the moment. I’d be happy to see them completed.

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    #8

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    Mary Rose Kent
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As a long-ago fencer, I want to say great job of getting the gazelle in a very believable advance position!

    AdelaideRose111
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah but I have something to tell you. I am not left handed!

    Magoomba
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was doing laundry in the basement of my college dorm. There was one other guy down there, too, who I knew. There were two metal curtain rods leaning against the wall & the two of us started ‘sword fighting’. Time and time again this guy would successfully stab me within five seconds. I couldn’t stop him. Finally in total frustration I said “I can’t believe that I’m so terrible at this”. He smiled & said “don’t feel too bad. I took 4th place in the NYC competition last year”.

    #9

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    IrrelevantNonsense
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’d choose a fist bump over a butt sniff any day..don’t know ‘bout y’all tho.,.

    #10

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    Merri Leatherwood
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lol 😅 That's funny? I get it cause I have tremors too! 😂

    13
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What does accidentally spitting out your dentures have to do with tremors?

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    #11

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    Tom Hanlin
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This would be perfect for the New Yorker. It's incomprehensible.

    Robecca
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely add some dogs in there

    Robecca
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Think a few dogs would join in too :)

    Albert
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ricky Gervais is the man!

    Sleazy Weaver
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ricky gervais is the *unapologetic transphobe who turned an opportunity to learn from his mistakes into an opportunity to publicly mock someone for her gender, repeatedly deadname her after admitting he knows it's wrong, make inappropriate comments & gestures about her genitals, & therefore teach his audience that treating transgender people like this is okay when it is in fact extremely harmful & downright dangerous considering the transgender suicide rate (98% of transgender individuals who experienced 4+ acts of discrimination/violence within a year contemplated suicide. 51% attempted). https://youtu.be/7ICG_hLLfbM

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    #12

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    Why?
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You always were a bit harebrained.

    Jody Brown
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This seems, to me, very attuned to The New Yorker's humor aesthetic.

    #13

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    #14

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    Why?
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This little piggy went ... Wee, wee, wee, all the way home!

    Lukyan Terdal
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your username reflects what I am thinking right now.

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    #15

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    Mary Rose Kent
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can only wonder at why that never occurred to him 🙄

    Mine Truly
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew a small town comedian. He was constantly practicing and revising his routine. He'd test out new jokes on friends, like me, and take feedback, then revise. He was in other theatrical groups as well to polish his presentation shills, emotional delivery, etc. There's definitely a lot a comedian can do to be funnier, beyond coming up with funny things to say, that many amateurs wouldn't think to do.

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    #20

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    rspanther
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those really aren't good for you, their diet is terrible, and the liver is shot from too many three martini lunches. The old ones the meat is too tough. The young one are just to greasy, or is it slime? I'm not sure on that.

    L.a. Williams
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe they eat ego. Politicians have huge egos

    bob bruce
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eyes too big, and twice as many Os as there should be.

    Albert
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They'd be doing us a favor.

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    #22

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    Why?
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like he's had years of expertise.

    IrrelevantNonsense
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha, this reminds me of my pop. He used to act like this and it was hilarious 😂. He died in 2018 and it’s nice to be reminded of him in a funny way. If only I could give more upvotes!

    Chich
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Here we find the internet troll in his natural environment, resting before venturing forth to spew anew.

    #23

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    Harry pottsh
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cows die if there not milked tho. what I would hate was being kicked in the @ss for trying to keep it alive. ( nearly happend at a fair when i was like 8)

    Poultry Geist
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cows die if they’re not milked ? I think they just quit producing milk !

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    #24

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    Mine Truly
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If these got rejected, maybe you can try submitting cartoons that address topics in some of New Yorker's articles? Like, find a specific article and then make a cartoon related to it? Just an idea, I don't know how this industry works.

    Albert
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The best ones never get chosen.

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    #25

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    Cayna Louise
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He’s blaming the scissors for cutting off that guy’s ear

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    Albert
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Psychology of a psychopath.