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“I Married The Wrong Person”: 40 People Revealed Confessions They’d Never Admit In Real Life
Everyone has things they’d rather keep to themselves than say out loud. But online, it’s a different story. With anonymity as a shield, people often feel free to let slip the thoughts they keep tucked away.
That’s what happened when a Mumsnet user asked others to confess what they wouldn’t admit in person. The replies came rushing in, from lighthearted to jaw-dropping, and everything in between. Scroll down to read some of the most memorable confessions and share your thoughts in the comments.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Getting my ducks in a row. I dream of a tiny seaside cottage/bedsit/beach hut where no one can find me, especially husband. I will go and visit the now adult kids but not sure if i will tell anyone where I am actually living. I'll change my name, too. Thinking about it keeps me going when life gets too depressing. I am doing what I can to make it happen though, it's not just wishful thinking.
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#2
I am 47 years old and still have an imaginary friend. When I'm bored, scared or stressed, out he comes. He's great, the best version of everyone and he thinks I'm great too. I'm aware it's avoidance and escapism, or my way of working out problems. I'm aware he's not real, but he's grown up with me. His name is James.
#3
I really can't be bothered with [intercourse] and wouldn't care if I never had it again. I also hate sharing my bed - with anybody.
#4
My 10 year old is starting chemotherapy soon. The doctors say the outlook is very positive, to him and to everyone I am being very positive and upbeat and keeping spirits up and insisting everything will be fine, because what else can you do? Inside I can't even think of it I'm so terrified.
LinkTheHylian 2 months ago
There won't be anyone who has been/is in that position who doesn't agree with you. Let's hope this kid kicked cancer in the nuts.
#5
I get so so jealous of people who can make their brain quiet or restful. Mine is always so noisy sometimes I just want to scream.
#6
One of the reasons I approve of the strictest possible restrictions on gun ownership is that if I owned a gun I’d have shot loads of people by now.
#7
My father has early stage Alzheimer’s, and is totally in the denial stage.
i will be relieved when he passes. I will be sad I’m sure, but I’m exhausted caring for him, working full time and looking after my own family (with a disabled child). I don’t wish it happens soon, but I also don’t wish it doesn’t. I’m just so tired.
realenancy170 2 months ago
I felt this way about my Mil when her dementia got really bad. She was no longer the kind , dignified person she had been. I was afraid I would only remember the bizarre person she had become. I started looking at pictures of us all after she died so that I could remember the positives.I still have a lot of guilt over the way I felt about her at the end.
#8
I have decided that if I win the lotttery I will not be telling a soul. Not DP, family, friends. Noone. I am just going to keep it in my account for at least a year while I decide what to do with it. I will make plans to help who I want and give some to them but not for a year, secretly meet with financial advisors and get it locked down properly. I will carry on as normal, go to work and secretly view houses and choose the one i want and buy it and renovate it on the sly. Then one day, big reveal. I don't want anyone influencing me with their batshit ideas before i had time to think
#9
I have 1 friend and we aren't very close. Tried to have friends but I find it tough or I feel they don't make an effort with me even if I try. Alot of "friends" have stabbed me in the back. Im pretty lonely
#10
I have stopped all medication and screenings so I dont prolong my life.
#11
I genuinely wish I could runaway from my husband and child and live by myself for a few months
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
Don't most people feel like this about their families at some point in their lives?
#12
I can’t stand my cocky, cheeky, spoiled, deliberately unkind, niece. The apple hasn’t fallen far off the tree either.
#13
I’ve always suspected my Dad wasn’t my real Dad. He died last year. In my 20s I had always wanted to send some of his hair off or his toothbrush for DNA tests. Now I don’t care if he wasn’t, he was an incredible person and I miss him terribly, part of me died the day he did and life has never been the same since.
Michael Largey 2 months ago
The man who raised you is your real dad. Anyone else involved is just some Johnny Applesperm.
#14
My head is elsewhere most of the time. Family days out, meals with my DH, holidays…I’m there in body but my mind is constantly dreaming about a different life.
#15
I love my husband very much, but if he left me tonight, I know I'd be absolutely fine.
Marcellus II 2 months ago
Define love? I love my cat very much, but if he left me tonight... I'd absolutely not be fine.
#16
I pretend to listen to my husband but just smile and nod.
Tucker Cahooter 2 months ago
I do that with *everyone*, since that I am as deaf as a post. Probably why people at work like me since I am so agreeable
#17
Im not good enough for my husband.
He would tell you that I am the best thing to ever happen to him, he thinks that i am wonderful. He is an incredible husband and father, but the reality is, he could do a lot better.
#18
I wish my mother was proud of me.
#19
Sitting for lunch in the work canteen, whenever I spot the wankiest manager in the food queue across the room, I hold up my fork and look at him through it so I can imagine what he'd look like in prison.
Small wins.
#20
My ex and I split up over 6 years ago. I still can't decide if he was controlling, coercive and if he sexually assaulted me, or if I am making it worse than it was in my head. I have never dated since we split and cannot bring myself to make myself be vulnerable with someone. I am so lonely, but cannot see a way out.
Zig Zag Wanderer 2 months ago
As others suggested on other posts, seek therapy. You need to talk to someone understanding, and externalise the trauma in order to deal with it.
#21
I married the wrong person
My life would be significantly easier if my mother weren’t in it.
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 2 months ago
You can change your partner for someone new. Harder to change your mother though.
#22
I hold so much anger and resentment to my mother. No matter what she does to try and make up for the bad, it was for so long I can’t forgive her
#23
I wish my husband would leave me so I can get out of this [horrible] marriage and not have to be the one to make the decision to blow apart our family. But honestly it's just too much of a hassle so I'm staying even though I know I'm not happy. Life is too hard as it is.
UnpopularPanda 2 months ago
I wish and hope they somehow get out of this, there's nothing worse than being in a bad relationship and not being able to do anything about it :( because society, people, morals, and whatnot
#24
I wish I had never been born.
LinkTheHylian 2 months ago
Me too. My mother was told she could never have kids. I came along within 3 years of that assessment, yet I often feel like I was given life just to be tortured. I may genuinely be in Hell as I have no way of knowing.
#25
When DH and I made our wills, we named my niece and nephew as joint beneficiaries if, somehow, our children died before us.
DH has 2 nephews, his sister's sons, and he doesn't like them, they're sarcastic and sly just like their dad.
If SIL knew she'd probably be very upset but we'd be dead so we wouldn't care.
Michael Largey 2 months ago
Mention DH's brother and family in passing in the will so they can't claim they were left out by mistake.
#26
I lie to taxi drivers! I don't even know why. I don't venture anything voluntarily, but if they ask me questions - just about anything, like where have you been out tonight or whatever - I make [stuff] up.
#27
I am worthless and men treat me [horrible], for some reason I continue to allow it. I cant ever see it being any different.
#28
I don’t love my DH and it was a deliberate choice. Married 25 years with one child. I’d always been in messy relationships before that left me strung out and exhausted and, quite frankly, destroyed so I chose the steady regular guy who adored me. It works. Every now and then I have a crush on someone else and those crazy feelings come up and it reminds me of the terror and pain and I’m glad of the choice I’ve made. But I don’t love him. He’s very happy though.
#29
I grew up so poor we had nothing, life has improved but it's something I'm haunted by. It was tough.
Zig Zag Wanderer 2 months ago
Hopefully you will always understand the value of financial security. Many don't.
#30
I still have wonderful dreams about the man I had an affair with 25 years ago, despite having been married to my second husband for the last 20 years.
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
I sometimes have dreams about a toxic ex-boyfriend. I always wake up going, "Ewww! Ick! Stop with this!!" Can't imagine it's uncommon.
#31
I’m in love with my best friend. She told me she fell in love with me years ago, but that ship has long sailed. I wish I told her how I felt at the time. She’s married now.
#32
I felt nothing when my father died. I wish I had not helped to organise his funeral. Younger me felt a sense of obligation. I wish I had been stronger because the bastard treated my mum appallingly.
I feel deep shame about my appearance. I do not have the willpower to lose weight and keep it off. I feel like a disgusting failure. It consumes my thoughts every minute of every day. I go through periods where I make myself sick but I even can’t do that right as I don’t lose weight.
Luke Branwen 2 months ago
One of the most unsettling things I've ever seen was that cold, stone-faced apathy my mom - usually an EXTREMELY emotional person - displayed after she learned her father died. She showed more emotion when Chester Bennington died, and that was MY favorite singer, not hers. I guess that's what you get when you are a despotic, cheating a$$hole.
#33
I often feel guilty over how I treated an ex. I didn’t love him and I didn’t treat him nicely.
Nadine Debard 2 months ago
I once wrote a letter to an ex to apologize. It was maybe 5 or 6 years after I broke up with him. He answered, thanking me for the beautiful letter, and giving me some news. We're writing each other once every 5 years. We don't have feelings anymore but he's a good person and I wish him well. It's never too late to do things well.
#34
My husband gives me the ick, it's like he's decided he's an old man and gets no enjoyment from life. I'd leave him but I literally cannot bear the thought of being away from our DC half of the time. So I'm in this for at least another 10 years.
#35
I was really drunk after a massive row with BF and went on to a party where I BFs best pal was coincidentally. I was close to him, we had some very similar upbringings and often had heart to hearts about stuff BF didn't understand. He has nice to me and i was excessively flirty, didn't try to kiss him but I was hugging him and saying I thought he was cute etc, I was a disgrace that night. He literally put me into a taxi and sent me home. That was over 20 yrs ago. I married BF and this man is now my DSs godfather, his wife is a v close friend. I am so embarrassed every time I think of it. I pray he doesn't remember but of course he does. Its never been acknowledged between us.
Claire Holman 2 months ago
IMO, flirting and hugging, especially if physical contact is consensual, is hardly worth stressing over. Your husband's friend was a gentleman that night; allowed you to do what you needed to do to vent, took care of you, and didn't take advantage.
#36
I despise my Dad's wife.
I know that's ridiculous when I'm 55 and they've been together 50 years. I imagine myself at her funeral standing there and not shedding a single tear just so other people can see that I hate her.
Scott Rackley 2 months ago
That's an awful lot of rent free space to give someone in your head
#37
I spent 30 years of my life with PMDD. I could have had a very different life if I’d have the medication I’m on now.
Aimee Miller 2 months ago
I have this too and my life is unrecognisable now I'm on meds. I'm thankful I'm on the right ones now though, good luck for your future without pmdd! 😊
#38
My best friend hates her husband and has done for years..she talks about it all the time but finds reason after reason not to go. I love her but it drives me crazy..
#39
I’m in around 30k debt that no one knows about
i often think of an ex from 10+ years ago
Beak Hookage 2 months ago
Financial problems can be far more traumatic than some people realise. I used to know a guy who got massively in debt and couldn't find a way out. He also couldn't bring himself to ask for help, or even confide in someone. Instead, he ultimately took his own life.
#41
I find all humans disgusting, all the stuff inside trying to leak out of all the orifices, nose, bum ,mouth etc. I can't stand being near them .
That includes myself too
Zig Zag Wanderer 2 months ago
That's a serious problem that requires medical help. Please do seek some.
#42
I actually enjoy that people are seeing my ex for who he is.
I spent years trying to hide it from everyone and actually even his mother is of the POV that I'm the only one to be trusted to see the kids OK, so when she passes, she says her house is going to the GC directly, he's to inherit nothing as he will just gamble it away anyway!
#43
I didn't mourn my mother when she died at all.
Drop Bear from Hell 2 months ago
I didn't bother going to my s***m donor's funeral and won't be going to my mother's or sister's....
#44
I often see spirits, I always have since a child. I don’t pick when I see them but I feel them and I see them often. I don’t tell people this as I’m sure most think I’m crazy or assume I have some control over this.
#45
I met somebody once fifteen years ago and still can’t stop thinking about her. I am as unromantic as they come, don’t believe in love at first sight or soul mates or any of that rubbish but somehow she occupies space in my brain.
#46
On the surface I have the perfect life.
Every so often I have the strong urge to blow the entire thing apart.
#47
My daughter's way of speaking sometimes goes right through me and I want to get away from her ( nothing major just this whiney time she puts on the end of her sentences sometimes)
My oldest son will probably never get a girlfriend
I haven't bothered to stay in contact with my stepdad since my mum died cos I find him creepy and he's gross
Claire Holman 2 months ago
I don't know; if you raised your kids, can't you speak to her honestly about the way she speaks? You may not be the only one who finds it annoying, but she doesn't realize she's doing it.
#49
I'm bored by my best friend's grief over the death of her elderly parents 5 years ago.
My patience is gone for social media posts about being unable to move on, particularly when she judges other people who don't deal with their losses in the same way.
#50
I have the perfect marriage on paper. Have been celebate for 14+ years since DD was born. Husband's choice. He says he is happy, he knows I am not. I dont have many friends. ND suicidal teenager makes it difficult. dream of a different life.
#51
My dad isn't my real dad. My DH knows this (my parents dont know I know) but what I haven't told anyone IRL is that my whole very successful, professional career is consciously founded on my desire to catch people out in lying, as my mother did (and still does) to me.
#52
My friends family recipe potato salad is no good.
Littlemiss 2 months ago
Neither is my besties cooking we discovered when she served up half cooked bacon, half cooked eggs, and toast with off butter smeared on it. Sadly her bf is a chef and refuses to teach her to cook.
#53
I haven't worked in nearly four years due to my mental health. Sadly my parents love to gloat over any misfortune and would tell people, so I've lied all this time to protect myself.
#55
I don't listen to much of what my husband witters on about, but have perfected the art of appearing interested by picking up a word to repeat here and there, and making bland comments or asking basic questions which could be about anything.
LinkTheHylian 2 months ago
There's a difference between talking and having a conversation. If you don't actively engage in what your partner is discussing with you, then why bother staying with them? Communication is key.
#56
My best friend and I have both been single for a decade, we both have a child but mine is younger than hers, so her DD has left home. Shes just amazing. Shes now got into a fabulous relationship and I'm delighted for her and they have just gotten a house. But I'm also completely jealous. (I don't want my own relationship!) I miss her. I miss our chats for an hour in an evening, our spontaneous let's go watch this at the cinema, or try a new restaurant. I've been trying to plan something with her for weeks, but it's always she's doing x with BF or she's not sure yet.
I feel like I'm relegated to time she's not with him and if I ring whilst she is, then I get ushered off the phone. I'm just a little sad over it and hope it settles soon.
#57
I have already decided I won’t attend my stepmum’s funeral when she dies, in fact I will be raising a glass in joy.
My neighbour’s hubby is fit as hell.
I’m sick of listening to a friend with depression go on and on like a stuck record, I’ve given so much support and advice but she never takes it. She just wants to stay depressed because I think it gets her attention. It sucks the life out of me and I’m going to distance myself now.
My DC drive me mad this summer with constant squabbling that the day I dropped them back on the first day back I went home, opened a small bottle of Prosecco and drank it peacefully in the garden. It was the best point of my summer.
#58
It was very traumatic and awful at the time, but I'm secretly glad that my exDP and my best mate were having an affair, because otherwise I wouldn't have had the excuse to dump him. And another thing is that I secretly miss ex best friend a lot more than I ever missed my ex boyfriend.
#59
I have a very jealous streak.
I have a very bad temper.
When I’m home alone I’ll scream as loud as possible to get the anger and jealousy out.
#60
I am having 2 separate relationships with people I really shouldn't be.
I am sick to death of putting on my 'i'm really good' persona, when I'm actually breaking inside.
#61
I worry my oldest friend’s husband is one huge red flag. I’ve never got a good vibe from him. I always ask my friend if she’s ok, and she seems happy, but over the past 13 years I’ve wondered.
Becca not Becky 2 months ago (edited)
I felt that way about someone. Decades later, I found out I was right
#62
I also have a horrendous temper and I do often wonder what's wrong with me. I keep it hidden well though
#63
I’m 100% planning revenge on my evil relative — just waiting for the right method and opportunity
#64
I broke up with one of the best people on the planet today. He has moved out.
#65
It occurred to me recently that I have cheated on every partner that I have ever had all my life. But only when it was obvious the relationship was in terminal decline. To add: I have never cheated on current DH and have no plans to.
It shook me a bit, the first time I realised the truth in black and white.
#66
I have a work colleague that I have recently been spending far too much time thinking about in let’s just say a not work related kinda way 🫣 As far as I know they have no idea…
#67
Am separating from LTP of 25 years. Still living together while house sale goes through. Despite people saying 'so sorry' or 'that's sad', i actually can't wait to go our separate ways and i haven't cried about it once.
#68
Sometimes I daydream about my DH dying so I can move from this 'dream' house and be free from this relationship that makes him happy but me miserable.
Michael Largey 2 months ago
I have to assume that a dream house would feature a door somewhere.
#69
I know my DB, who everyone praises, is flat broke because of the adventurous life he's led. His new investment strategy he's boasting about is because they're in their 50's and are scrambling to find money to retire on. Because they have nothing.
#70
I sell things on vinted that people have gifted or passed on to me for free. I'd never tell anyone in real life and have actively judged and shamed others who've told me they do this
#72
There's a large cardboard box on the floor of my wardrobe and in it I have every single empty Marmite jar that I have ever finished. If it's been a shite day at work I like to count them to remind myself I am 83 (latest count) Marmite jars old, which is a real accomplishment you tossers.
Michael Largey 2 months ago
Empty Marmite jars are wonderful if I was the one who got to empty them.
#73
I get physically and mentally exhausted by being the bread winner. My DH earns a good wage but it wouldn't come close to covering our outgoings and that's in a 2 bed house in NE Scotland (nursery bill is double our mortgage). We split bills on ratio so it's equal but I always seem to be living off £50 a week after bills in order to go on holidays as I need the break away from home and my work!
#74
I wish my friend's wife would die so we could be together.
#75
I’m pissed off that my eleven-year-old daughter seems to have somehow ended up with my husband’s sister’s skinny, long-legged build. I was a muscular kid and my husband was a chubby kid, and I feel like now my daughter will look more like her aunt and less like me. And I’m her mother. How does my daughter have the body type of her aunt, who is my husband’s half-sister genetically?
Irrational as it is, I grew up thinking of naturally skinny girls as almost a slightly different species, who never had to deal with the problems other girls did and were therefore unrelatable.
#76
I should have had an affair with my married co-worker when I had the chance. Instead we stared at each other too long and I didn't dare make the move I know he wanted me to.
It would have been a one off. I still regret it. I miss him.
#77
Im married and I shagged my married boss twice
Michael Largey 2 months ago
I've had bosses I liked and was grateful to as well, but not enough to put carpet down for them.
#78
I usually have a wee in the pool when I’m swimming.
Sara Frazer 2 months ago
Aaaand people like this are why I won't go in public pools/hot tubs/water parks etc.
#79
I'm 12 weeks pregnant with a surprise baby and I don't think my husband is the dad. Going off dates it's more likely to be my colleague that I slept with once. Neither of them know
#80
I hate my dog. I really despise it. It's not even about anything it does, just the mere fact that it's in my house constantly. I would love to rehome it but DH would never agree.
StrangeOne 2 months ago
When my now-ex brought a puppy home, without consulting with me about it, it put me in such a hard place. I love animals. We had 2 cats (one was mine and the other my daughter's), and 2 fish tanks (for his piranha and one for feeder fish, or other pet fish that couldn't live in the other tank without getting eaten. Although the coconut convict fish lasted a long time with the piranha.) But he thought it was unfair we had 2 cats and he didn't have a 4 legged friend. (So stupid, cos we all lived under the same roof.). We didn't have a big house. Just a starter, one story bungalow with a hallway kitchen. Having a puppy that needed a lot of attention, house training, but my now ex spent so much time in the garage getting high with his buddies, while I cleaned the house, and tended to everyone, was too much and totally unfair. The dog was a golden golden lab mix with something else. It was too big for our home. We split up a 1yr later, forcing him to give the dog away, anyways.
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Tucker Cahooter 2 months ago
Well that was a nice depressing read. Time to watch some cat videos instead
Littlemiss 2 months ago
I can't wait for my mother and aunt to drop dead. They have been nothing but vile and abu*sive creatures their entire lives. They use people and cower behind their status as old age pensioners, who have never worked, let alone provided anything to society other than hatred and loathing. I have been scorned for working, belittled and a*bused my whole life by them. They continue their tirade because I cut contact.
Emilu 2 months ago
I'm sorry you've had to experience that. And god forbid you aren't a leech on society! Gasp! Sounds like they don't deserve you.
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Ellinor she/they/elle 2 months ago
My grandmother passed away 3 weeks ago and I'm not feeling sad. I mean I know I'm sad but I only cried the first 2 days and since then nothing, just a kind of rational feeling of "well she was old so it was to expect" even if she was only 74 and in top shape with no known health issues. I know I'm still in the denial stage but I'm genuinely worried for myself, for when I will fully realize that it happened. (I'm planning on seeing a therapist)
Gingersnap In Iowa 2 months ago
I hope seeing the therapist helps. Don't be so hard on yourself we all grieve differently. Melvin (dog) and Baby girl (cat empress of the house) send furry hugs 🤗
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Tucker Cahooter 2 months ago
Well that was a nice depressing read. Time to watch some cat videos instead
Littlemiss 2 months ago
I can't wait for my mother and aunt to drop dead. They have been nothing but vile and abu*sive creatures their entire lives. They use people and cower behind their status as old age pensioners, who have never worked, let alone provided anything to society other than hatred and loathing. I have been scorned for working, belittled and a*bused my whole life by them. They continue their tirade because I cut contact.
Emilu 2 months ago
I'm sorry you've had to experience that. And god forbid you aren't a leech on society! Gasp! Sounds like they don't deserve you.
Load More Replies... Ellinor she/they/elle 2 months ago
My grandmother passed away 3 weeks ago and I'm not feeling sad. I mean I know I'm sad but I only cried the first 2 days and since then nothing, just a kind of rational feeling of "well she was old so it was to expect" even if she was only 74 and in top shape with no known health issues. I know I'm still in the denial stage but I'm genuinely worried for myself, for when I will fully realize that it happened. (I'm planning on seeing a therapist)
Gingersnap In Iowa 2 months ago
I hope seeing the therapist helps. Don't be so hard on yourself we all grieve differently. Melvin (dog) and Baby girl (cat empress of the house) send furry hugs 🤗
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