As a millennial, I still remember calling my high school best friend and talking for hours until there was nothing in our lives the other didn't know about. But the world has changed a lot since then and so has our communication habits.
In 2018, there were 2.25 billion mobile phone messaging app users globally and this number is expected to grow to 3.5 billion by 2025. In many places, the phrase "Everyone's texting" is not even an exaggeration.
But reducing an interaction to just symbols can be tricky. When there's so little that holds a conversation together, things are bound to get (a little) chaotic. And the Instagram account 'Funny Texts' is a perfect example of that.
From contacting the wrong number to simple puns, continue scrolling to check out what it has to offer.
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You have to notice that the message in the middle appears as "not delivered". So if you read just the other ones, it says "I ended up banging your wife and daughter"
Load More Replies...I have seen this around 10 times in other meme accounts but this is just too funny.
I'm cringing for this poor dude. He's gonna have some explain to do
WeChat is popular in China, Line is big in Japan, and WhatsApp... Well, it's WhatsApp. It has 2 million users. But in these apps, messages travel over the internet rather than over phone lines like SMS texts and, interestingly, the United States is one of the few big countries where SMS, the texting technology with origins in the 1980s, remains a standard way to chat.
As Shira Ovide highlighted in The New York Times, America's SMS exceptionalism has its pros and cons. The biggest benefits of SMS are that it works on almost any phone, and people are not locked into one company's communications world. The drag, however, is that SMS has security flaws, and it lacks features of modern chat apps like notifications that your friend has read your message, or the ability to start a video call from a text.
He was a sweet potato, a real spud muffin. He taterly had eyes for green texter
Many people also think that texting is bad because it makes us lazy in the way we speak, but language guru David Crystal thinks that it's causing neither bad spelling nor moral decay.
The UK's leading linguistic academic told The Guardian, "Almost every basic principle that people hold about texting turns out to be misconceived."
exactly michael pizza deliverymen are the backbone of modern society. who doesn't love pizza
It's funny if you make something sound intellectual then people are impressed but then when you put it into laymen terms for them they are unimpressed its like when someone likes their food until you tell them whats in it.
you don’t need superpowers to be a hero! just help others out and do the right thing!!! (i mean superpowers are cool tho)
So where do you work? I'm an executive concierge for an international hor'deurve delivery service. Oh cool, what's it called?? Dior Dashe. Are you just saying DoorDash? That is one way to pronounce it, yes. 🤣
Which is why i ordered domino's lmao. Love you domino's never stop being delicious and affordable
Load More Replies...*fire engine sound* Hello? We are here to put out the fire caused by HIS BADASS MOM
Load More Replies...holy s**t are flame throwers just lying around in the streets of something?
"Misspelling isn't universal: analysis shows that only 10% of words used in texts are misspelled. Nor are most texts sent by kids: 80% are sent by businesses and adults," Crystal explained.
"Likewise, there is no evidence that texting teaches people to spell badly: rather, research shows that those kids who text frequently are more likely to be the most literate and the best spellers, because you have to know how to manipulate language."
I have worked as an editor, I would correct this same wording in an academic paper or formal business communication, and still understand that people who correct it in spoken or text conversation are pretentious douchebags.
Trevor is a nit-picking grammarian, like me. 40+ years teaching has that effect on us. It's why Japanese people's mangling of our language is so disturbing.
When my lil bro hit a road runner my mom made similar jokes about the Coyote finally getting what he's always wanted, while my brother is bawling his eyes out
Weeelll that could go to ways. Roach is also a type of fish so no fish for a week, a c**k can refer to a male chicken, so no chicken for a week. If you are using the non dietary definitions then you're on your own.
According to Crystal, if you can't spell a word, then you don't really know whether it's cool to misspell it in the first place.
"Kids have a very precise idea of context - none of those I have spoken to would dream of using text abbreviations in their exams - they know they would be marked down for it."
Of course, changing public opinion is hard work, but Crystal is hopeful he can convert the linguistic reactionaries.
been there done that. the "hehe" of satisfaction is satisfying as hell lol
Load More Replies...I need to remember this. My google assist tends to do whatever the h3ll it wants and often gives me suggestions on what to ask (ie tell me a joke). Then it has the nerve to say "sorry, I cannot do that". Then don't bloody well suggest it!
um excuse me??? the network auto reply is my best friend, not yours!
And then TMobile replies to the "hehe" with another "Sorry, this service is not available" so their a double b***h
I get those same messages although I pay for ‘unlimited’ data?!? How is this legal?
I just texted this to a couple of people. Waiting for the response. Heh, heh. First reply - a meme shrugging it's shoulders. Second reply: Suspension Cables.
"The reality is that people have always had a tremendous fear about the impact of new technology on language," Crystal said.
"When the printing press was first invented, people thought it was an instrument of the devil that would spawn unauthorized versions of the Bible. The telephone created fears of a breakdown in family life, with people no longer speaking directly to one another. And radio and television raised concerns about brainwashing.
The sad thing is...she did it doubly wrong if she put in on her vagina and not her vulva.
I really hope it was just a case of not realizing the correct terminology, because otherwise, OW!
Load More Replies...I'm SO glad I'm a man. Women have to deal with really annoying, traumatic physical stuff that I know I couldn't handle.
The adhesive side is waterproof. How did she deal with the blood going all over? Even if she switched primarily to tampons it sounds like she repeatedly relied on the pads some times. This just can't be real.
I'm guessing she saved a fair amount of money on waxing her whisker biscuit though
My dad left me in a shopping cart. Some seriously old man had to chase him down to stop him from leaving without me. It was one of my parents' favorite story. I'm still not sure how I feel about that.
After my son was born my husband, me, and my daughter went to the store. We were talking and all of us simultaneously started walking off without the stroller…. In our defense he was still pretty new and we were so used to it being just us three. 😂 Thankfully he was only sitting in the bread aisle a minute before I came to my senses! 🤦♀️
My parents have at times forgotten me for hours on end.
Load More Replies...Once my dad farted so loud that he cleared the table behind him xD
My 5 year old daughter,without asking her,took the heat for my farty sounding shoes while I was in court.impeccable wingman.
My mom used to make me do yoga with her when I was little and one time she farted so loud it echoed and she whispered “we can never go back” we never did
I once went to an art exhibition where everyone but me had paid for an audio guide and they were all at it. It was like they had whoopie cushions attached to their feet.
I laughed so hard at this, I had to mute my meeting!! 🤣🤣🤣
Load More Replies...I'll fully admit, I once managed to quiet half a high school lunchroom with a belch. Never pulled it off again and never want to either. If I'm not at work, I like to fade into the background.
I WOULD DO THIS WITH MY BESTIE! “Excuse me stranger, how long was I in Narnia?”
Expected response: "Took you long enough to come out of the closet!"
"Text messaging is just the most recent focus of people's anxiety; what people are really worried about is a new generation gaining control of what they see as their language."
At its most basic, language is an expression of identity. How we speak is central to who we think we are and where we think we belong. So feel free, experiment, and send the funniest results of your 'studies' to 'Funny Texts!'
Don't salute him! What if he was in bed with Ashley's best friend?
Load More Replies...Really though, violent girlfriend is way outdated comedy material. Would anyone laugh if it was a girl and her boyfriend’s mum told her to run because he’s coming for her with a baseball bat
We're playing softball later at the park. Can't play without a bat, duh
Me talking to my husband on the phone "can you call my phone I can't find it" him "babe? Really?" 🤦♀️
why cant it be that he is connected to whatsapp web and chatting through his laptop ?
I have had my mom tell me to call my phone with my phone to see where my phone was...so that was really confusing and dumb {to be fair she's going through cancer and kidney failure and is slowly dieing, so shes is not all there right now}
Some phones have an auttocorrect setting and you can make it auttocorrect specific words to others, like in this case, have it auttocorrect "hi" to "nugget"
Load More Replies...I once set my husband's phone so that every time he asked me for a particular sexual favor it would autocorrect to "I'm a twit". 🤣
This reminds me of a related post in which someone changed every word they could think of on their mom's phone to "nugget" or "nyoom".
small lessons in life, don't shake it in public guys.....you could get soda on everybody
looks more like something pulled from r/im14andthisisdeep than something awesome 🙄
Load More Replies...Even worse considering their name in the phone
Load More Replies...Have enough self-control to come up with this kind of comeback is my new life goal
This isn't even funny. This is sad especially if you look at the name
You know. I will say this to everyone because there's not enough positivity in the world. Your very awsome!
I've been in the position of the "nervous guy" in this, with my uncle. Don't do this, I beg you. It's just mean.
Your honor, I would like to introduce exhibit A in the case of "Made up text exchanges"
Load More Replies...Must be one big f*****g blender. I think this one is fake for the setup and punch line.
Too bad it's a scripted joke, should write the last two lines to make it more natural.
wellllllll if she's in the audience, fair enough... it's if she's on stage that I think the mom needs to ask questions, like, is she not giving her enough pocket money...
If she is a dancer at a club she is at least 21, so I think most people would agree that it isn't the mom's responsibility to give her money for rent, bills or pocket money. And while I agree there's nothing wrong with the sister being a guest at the club (except that he may be outting her sexuality before she was ready to do so), equally so, i don't see why there isn't anything wrong with someone being a stripper. It's a legitimate job, you pay taxes just like other jobs, and mentally and physically, it is far from an easy line of work.
Load More Replies...I thought that too but based on the comments, I think they mean working at the club.
Load More Replies...Yes, It's take your daughter-to-work day, my son. See you in a moment.
Coming to the stage now Miss Kitty, also Jeff's sister. Make her feel welcome..
So very mysterious that we don't even understand 1/2 the time.
Load More Replies...My cousin is "Mama Bear", my friend is "Her Majesty Queen [name]", and my other friend is "[name] the Great". My big brother is "The Fluff".
Load More Replies...Always save as Pizza Man. Back in my paranoid days you would call and say man I could eat a whole pizza that was an ounce of Bud. Or man I think I can handle half a pizza and that was a half oz
Who discusses this with their dad?! Boundaries people! The line is a dot to him!
It's not like this is a screenshot of an actual conversation.
Load More Replies...Yes. It's a free out. "really, you don't think the emojis are too much?" would work too.
Load More Replies...same as my parents when i win a game at 3 am
Load More Replies...Wow literally thought blue was going to say "were you born on a highway? Because I wanna ride it all night loooong" like the song from Cars
Your address in the universe actually is: Earth, Third planet from sun, Solar system, local interstellar cloud, local bubble, orion arm, milky way galaxy, local group, virgo supercluster, observable universe, universe.
Gutentag, où est the library? I quiero una nueva könyv. Dw i'n hoffi cathod.
That language is European. I speak that and English, so two languages total 😁
Load More Replies...When I saw the name I knew this was staged but funny as hell
Load More Replies...I thought that was a good one, not actually worth a date, but still a good one
yeah this account is basically just him pretending to be a bonehead
Load More Replies...I want to see you struggle in Texas. It'd be fun.
Load More Replies...This guy is a pretty popular gag/joke guy online, I've seen a lot of his stuff, pretty funny but completely staged
Bought the wrong tickets and spent the rest of the day at the airport being an ignoramus
Well, many years ago, some guy took a plane to Oakland, California, but instead arrived in Auckland, New Zealand. He did get a bit worried after five or six hours overflying the Pacific Ocean but he wasn't that good at geography.
This is a joke I'm sure of it, I recognise the dude he does funny posts like this
Grandma is laughing and can't wait to show this to all her friends. (If she's a grandma now there's a VERY good chance she was a teen or 20-nothing in the 1960s)
Bored Panda! Stop covering body parts in paintings. What's the matter with you? You are worse than the Evangelicals in the US.
Richard Burton said arguing with Elizabeth Taylor was impossible because she would strip naked, and he couldn't concentrate.
I knew how to spell scissors but dude confused me so bad I had to look it up again.
So frustrating when neither of us know the correct spelling!
Load More Replies...I especially appreciate how after making this reply, they posted it to the internet for likes.
Load More Replies...I have literally done with past boyfriends, told them "Nah" cause I was gaming
tbf he just got a legenderary scar and launch pad AND the circle hasnt closed
I don'y know who the teacher was reffering to but backfire was well deserved ^^
I can picture her taking out her emoji pistol and shooting him over text
Maybe he should have started the text by telling her it was him and he has a new number. I think he did it on purpose, sounds like a creep.
im sorry but who texts their son/daughter in the middle of f*****g their mom like???
You can tell if it was intentional if there’s time stamps on the messages :)
well they weren't shellfish about those excellent puns, they didn't clam up and shared it online
Puns about the sea are not easy; it's just something you can't coast through.
Load More Replies...You've been hit by you've been struck by a smooth criminal
Load More Replies...Reminds me of Ethel´s 85th birthday. The denizens of the senior citizens home put on a birthday bash with cake, bubbly and a male stripper...... Guy come in, does his dance and strip and as a finishing flourish asks Ethel...: "Do you want super sex?" Ethel looks at the guy over the top of her glasses..: "Young man, I´m 85, I think I´ll have the soup!"
There is actually a restaurant in Phoenix called Souper! Salad!…..and all they serve is a giant salad bar of different kinds of soups and salads. It’s like that restaurant Sweet Tomatoes. Love that place!
S(he) should choosed better words to discribe.. Of course he think you mean him when saying "someone who looks like you".. That was just mean!
Try again. Male dogs are not referred to as bitches. When you say it to your pops, you’re still insulting her, directly. You’re just compounding it by also insulting his choice of a wife.
Load More Replies...Well, we're a bit Singapore, so Malawi you could just have some Syrial, or put the Turkey in the microwave Oman. It'll be better than eating nothing Nepal. Make sure to drink some Rwanda, too.
Japanese are such friendly folks, and helpful, generous. Food is awesome too. Why is that an insult? Get lost in America, or North Korea?
I'd guess that... yes, you are literally the only one. But that means you're unique!
Load More Replies...good eye good eye. You can even see the wrapper
Load More Replies...Looks like he's texting with a Slim Jim. Haha I just got the image of Macho Man in my head doing the commercial
I’m furiously trying to tap the blue button trying to get him to send it:
Adele would like to come in apparently, she's freezing her cheeks and nips off luv
That's nothing. My brother can hold his breath underwater for 17 weeks.
Load More Replies...A gimmicky broom/duster for cleaning the floor. They work great though.
Load More Replies...I wanna work at a restaurant just so I could do that and freak everyone out
🎵Spongebob? Please, I know you're in there People are asking where you've been...🎵
"She's only for me and not for you" mf you don't own her ffs
"So I said 'You obviously don't know what the hell you're talking about, you f*****g moron! A competent person teaching anti-bulling would be all over how words can be extremely damaging, even crippling! Where'd they find you - this scratch 'n' dent aisle at Psychs-R-Us? Oh, but I'm sure none of that hurt at all, 'cause they're just words.'"
Thank you for that, Greg. Can't stand your movie, though.
Load More Replies...If his father has the kind of money that he could afford that bribe, then it's probably a bargain price compared to a divorce.
Load More Replies...A Lotus Elise? Those are expensive, hard to find cars, at least in the US.
I'm going to assume this is some pop-culture reference I'm not familiar with.
'Damn, Daniel' is from a viral video and 'Bye Felisha' is from the movie Friday (and it then got picked up as a meme).
Load More Replies...This might be fake? At least according to stereotypes a guy would never miss out the opportunity to land at anything that’s not fast enough to escape /s
Well, it's highly unlikely that Chris has Trish listed as "Chris". So that at least is fake.
Load More Replies...wtf it should be: hella cute hella fine wanna be my valentine? It works so much better this way
this sounds oddly fake, nobody texts this and imagines this guy is supposedly doing strange stuff (like he could be giving anything i mean)
wrong. I had this happen..... but with a friends mom who was using his old phone.... Me and another friend were trying to acquire seeds, were already blasted and didn't believe it was actually his mom.... She stopped when I eventually said "Well s**t..... How have you been Mrs.****"
Load More Replies...When I said I got the stuff I meant our study hall papers yeah that's it
My grandma thought it was honeycomb with the flies as bees flying around it and she sent it to everyone saying, "We are so busy around here!"
R.I.P. Sweet Prince .... Picture relevance......it's me Beautiful-...68da6a.jpg
like all the texts in this list, which are painfully fake & unfunny.
Excuse me? I’m 12. I’m not at ALL like this and neither is anyone I know that is my age. If anything it’s sad 17 year old that no one likes.
Load More Replies...Yup once again I got downvoted into infinity for pointing one out.
Load More Replies...the fact that they have consistent spelling mistakes and the weird naming convention tells us one thing: it's fake, and that's quite annoying. also they're texting as if they're roleplaying the whole situation
The purest, non-fake one of these I’ve ever seen was about lightly fried fish fillets. Which is why it wasn’t featured on this list.
these really suck. they're clearly fake, riddled with typos (repetitive ones, further evidencing how fake it is because of course the same person will make the same mistakes), the contact names & sender/receiver are the wrong way around in several images (seriously?), many of them are rip-offs of cliche jokes, & none of these are funny except the first one. awful post, 0/10.
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They're all funny after No one gives a c**p if it's fake or not...nope don't give a poop! Just laugh!! Laugh Out Loud! They're all funny and that's all that matters. You boring dummies.
Yup once again I got downvoted into infinity for pointing one out.
Load More Replies...the fact that they have consistent spelling mistakes and the weird naming convention tells us one thing: it's fake, and that's quite annoying. also they're texting as if they're roleplaying the whole situation
The purest, non-fake one of these I’ve ever seen was about lightly fried fish fillets. Which is why it wasn’t featured on this list.
these really suck. they're clearly fake, riddled with typos (repetitive ones, further evidencing how fake it is because of course the same person will make the same mistakes), the contact names & sender/receiver are the wrong way around in several images (seriously?), many of them are rip-offs of cliche jokes, & none of these are funny except the first one. awful post, 0/10.
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They're all funny after No one gives a c**p if it's fake or not...nope don't give a poop! Just laugh!! Laugh Out Loud! They're all funny and that's all that matters. You boring dummies.
