From time to time, we all eavesdrop on conversations not intended for our ears. Whether it’s on public transport, in a shady bar, or at a coffee shop, our curiosity gets the better of us. Sometimes we can’t help it, and other times we might deliberately try to listen in on what a stranger has to say.
However, once you hear something, it can’t be unheard. So when someone asked, “What is the creepiest thing you’ve overheard?” on r/AskReddit, replies started pouring in. From weirdly disturbing to painfully ridiculous, these stories show how people forget to read the room before loudly oversharing their thoughts.
Bored Panda has collected some of the best interactions from this thread, so continue scrolling and upvote the ones that surprised you the most. And if you’re in the mood for some more bizarre things people overheard in public, make sure to check out our previous posts about it right here, here, and here.
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I speak a small amount of russian. Not enough to get me through a conversation but after watching a bunch of videos and trying to learn the language, I can understand a fair amount more than I can speak.
I was in Toronto walking down the road and there were two guys, Russian, sitting and talking in Russian at a table. I overheard 4 words. Dead, Body, murder, and what was essentially dispose. I turned pale and got the f**k out of there.
I heard a dude grunting in the stall next to me trying to poop but they were clearly phantom poops.
Although, every time he farted he broke out into a hysterical laughter and would then return to grunting.
The grunting got louder and louder until he just let out this epic GRUNT. Seriously, I thought he was s***ting a boulder. I think the whole Student Union heard him.
Anyway, after the huge grunt I heard the smallest "plop" and all hell broke loose.
He was cheering at this victory by banging on the side of the stall. Screaming with happiness. Between his screaming laughter he would yell, "F**k you poop! You can't control me!"
I think he forgot to wipe and wash his hands because then he just walked out.
I still wonder if I should try to be more proud of the poops I take.
We reached out to Veronica Galvan, Ph.D., a professor in the Psychology department at the University of San Diego, to learn more about eavesdropping and why we are so fascinated by what strangers have to say.
According to her, private conversations may catch our attention for several reasons. “They may contain personal information, and these interesting tidbits from other people’s lives may pique our interest.” Interestingly, such interactions also increase our curiosity because they may seem annoying.
I use to work at a Honda factory in Alabama and they get a lot of workers in from temp agencies, so you tend to get a lot of weird ones. As I'm walking back from my lunch break, I pass two guys and accidentally overhear, "I just want to impregnate the first thing I see." My only thoughts were, "Don't make eye contact, don't make eye contact, don't make eye contact."
The following stories were featured on another topic similar in nature (which I later featured on my blog)...
Four or five years ago, a friend of mine and I decided to stop at a Steak ‘N Shake after competing in an intense 10K for inline speed skating. You know… load up on carbs, calories, and grease to relax after a hard morning. After receiving our food and starting to enjoy our food, we both heard the following conversation take place:
Man: I wish we had more time… you know… really enjoy the foreplay instead of jumping right to it.
Woman: I know, baby. My husband gets home early and we can’t afford getting caught.
Man: Why don’t you just leave him already? You know damn well you don’t love him anymore. You know I can provide you with everything he does and then some.
Woman: But the kids…
Man: Consider their college paid for. In cash. You know I can do it.
Woman: I love you.
Man: Then come be with me.
Woman: Next week, okay?
They then kissed each other passionately (read: make out with slobbery tongue action) and left.
ಠ_ಠ
Okay... not so creepy, but still disturbing. Another gem of a story that made me REALLY uncomfortable...
About two years ago, I had traveled out of town to go visit a jobsite my company was contracted for and wanted to enjoy a nice treat: Steak ‘N Shake. (See… we don’t have any around where I live and the closest one is at least 70 miles away; If I’m near one, I enjoy the hell out of it.) Again… I had just ordered my food and I suddenly begin overhearing the conversation taking place behind me. The voices sounded older… late 50′s, maybe early 60′s.
Man 1: Oh! I forgot to tell you I talked to Jenny [not exact name] the other day!
Man 2: Sweet! How’s she doing? How’s her daughter?
Man 1: She’s great, man. Her daughter is as beautiful as ever.
Man 2: Good deal. I remember her daughter used to be SMOKING hot. I wish I could [censored, for the sake of my sanity] before the school boys get to it!
Man 1: Oh, you and me both!
Man 2: How old is she now?
Man 1: She just turned 13.
...
What in the royal horse f**k did I just hear?
“Bystanders to these private conversations may think that it’s inappropriate to discuss personal topics in public settings. In some cases, the bystanders are a captive audience; for example, they’re not able to leave because they’re waiting in line, or dining at a restaurant,” she added. People usually don’t appreciate their inability to escape the conversation and may end up feeling irritated. This often causes them to pay increased attention to the dialogue. “It’s an itch that can’t be scratched.”
I overheard someone in a bathroom talking to themselves in Yoda's voice saying "mmm tough this one is, use the force I must".
8 years ago, still creeps me out
I was in a PATH train car with about 10 or 11 businesswomen. All middle aged. All looking pretty damn professional. 8 or 9 of them looked pretty damn sexy(if I do say so myself)
They were going on about how to trick men into getting them pregnant. Not even to trap them in a relationship. They just had the baby rabies.
Like they left a convention or something.
I made eye contact with another dude on the train. I'm pretty sure we were thinking the same damn thing.
Galvan provided another reason why is it so difficult for us not to listen to private exchanges. “There’s an intriguing possibility that these private conversations may be even more attention-grabbing due to the pandemic. If people have spent increased time at home, there’s a sameness to the days, a blurring of time. Others’ private conversations may offer some distinctiveness to the day, a respite from the sameness.”
When asked if we awaken the nosy little eavesdropper within us on purpose, the professor said that listening to others’ conversations could happen consciously or subconsciously. “Our minds want to make sense of the world around us. If there is something interesting (or annoying) happening in our environment, we will latch onto that so we can better understand what is happening, why it’s happening, and whether it has any relevance to us.”
Not creepy, but more funny. I was in Applebees when this dude and his date/gf sit down at the table next to us. They launch into boring conversation about how shampoo is the governments way of controlling our minds. Then gf shouts "No way!" Everyone turns and looks and she blushes and lowers her voice. I, of course, listened.
"You...you're not really Jesus...are you?"
Dude smirked and nodded, and gf looked thoroughly impressed.
Pretty sure dude got laid that night.
Tl;dr, Jesus eats at Applebees
A guy I was standing near in the bar: "You know, the simple fact of the matter is, I could easily drug and [sexually overpower] any of these chicks. Most of them I wouldn't even have to drug, because I'm obviously stronger."
His friend: "That's one hundred percent fact. Hell, I'd help if she turned out the be a fighter. You know that."
I could pretend they were having a hypothetical discussion about women's safety issues, if it wasn't for that second guy's reply.
“Our brains try to impose meaning and patterns onto the world around us. Sometimes the relevance is obvious, but other times, not so much—like hearing the “tick-tock” of a clock that is actually repeating the same sound over and over again.”
Galvan mentioned that people find overheard interactions entertaining because of the unpredictability of the content as well as the missing context. “It’s a mystery for our brains to solve, and our minds may especially welcome this challenge to counter the sameness of our pandemic days,” she concluded.
When I was at In-N-Out at 1 AM having your average post-drinking midnight meal, There was a homeless guy in the corner, quite dirty and obviously trying to subtly eat some leftovers someone left because he was hungry. Some drunk frat bros were making fun of him, telling him to go back to his hole and other insults. After a few minutes of this, the homeless guy got up, stood on his table, and literally put a curse on them. I forget his exact wording because the scene was so shocking and I couldn't believe what I was seeing/hearing, but it was something to the effect of "I hereby curse you never to father healthy children and to die a painful death without love in the next year. You will be tortured by Satan for all eternity I swear it". The employees called the cops and the homeless dude left.
TL;DR: Homeless Man puts a curse on some a-holes at In-N-out.
When I was a bartender, I could overhear quite a few conversations. The most unnerving came when I saw a man hand another man a small brown container with a white cap. I only overheard snippets:
"… won't remember anything."
"Even from what happened before. Total eraser."
"… do it again and again."
"…. get blackouts. You don't know what kind of damage that does."
"… pass out? I'm not a necrophiliac."
"No, they participate all right…"
"Send the money back to Jamaica, or everyone's gonna die!"
I was waiting at a bus stop when a woman walked past me, screaming this into her phone. I'd very much like to find out if they sent the money back.
Back in elementary school and middle school, this one kid would be rapidly scribbling pictures in his notebook with his face practically two inches away from the page. He would mutter extreme violent things but I didn't think much of it. Even though he was constantly called into the school psychologists office and was into killing, he never pulled anything in school. To be honest I was glad I graduated and got away from him. He always made me nervous.
Fast forward to last year: My freshman year of college! I'm all happily relaxing in the library, when suddenly I hear that voice again. God dammit he goes to my college now ಠ_ಠ
I was sitting in my room quietly working on homework (I was in college at the time) and overheard two men (one of whom lived in the room next to me) calmly discussing the best way to [sexually overpower] me. It was 10am and they were already drinking beer. They were discussing tactics like drugging my food or drink, or physically overpowering me on my way to the bathroom, either very early or late when no one would be awake to hear me scream.
They then started discussing the vile things they wanted to do, mostly involving [harming] me in vicious and inventive ways.
Are you okay? Do you need help? I'm concerned about your safety and well-being.
"No, shut up. Just shut up. Listen to me. Go get some trash bags and rent a Uhaul. Everything's gonna be fine, I'll be there in 10 minutes." She then got up and walked out of the lobby while I exchanged horrified looks with the hotel cashier.
At Starbucks in a pretty affluent area. Two soccer moms are having a conversation about mom #1's 12-year-old son [inappropriately touching] his sister who sounded close in age. It was graphic and detailed about what he did and what they were doing to stop it. They were talking in normal tones and not even being remotely secretive about this.
No, I didn't call the cops. No one is going to believe a poor kid over rich soccer moms anyway.
But they WERE going to stoop it?? Good grief, the poor girl. Inapproiate touching is no unsual in very smalll kids, because they are just curios. But a 12 year old boy know better.
At Burger King one day, "And they found her dead in the river?..... Who pulled her out?.... Oh, she was murdered?" It was a guy talking very loudly on his cell phone. There was an audible sigh of relief when he left.
I was at an airport and had to use the restroom. This was in one of the smaller terminals so there was practically nobody near where I was except for in the stall next to me. I had sat down and was going about my business when all of the sudden I hear this high, feminine giggling coming from the occupied stall, please note, I was in the men's restroom. So I figure that some random lady got lost and ended up in the wrong restroom, but then I hear another, deeper voice telling the lady to be quiet. So I sit there for a moment, wanting to finish up as quickly as possible so I can leave before things get graphic, but I was too late when all of the sudden the guy yells: "Christ, you've got a d**k!" The stall door banged open and I heard the guy speed out of the bathroom, the 'girl' close behind him. I then took the shortest dump of my life and hurried back to my gate, my brain full of f**k. TL;DR: The Crying Game went down in the bathroom stall right next to me.
Work in prison so there is a lot, but one inmate telling me she was going to toss poo at me unless I fed her my boogers takes the list so far.
artworks-2...00x500.jpg 
Have some unsee juice, hope it helps!
There’s a degree in psychology that gets you the job (career in some cases) that requires that you listen to “prison crazies” all day. The one 20 year old whom I met couldn’t handle it because she said she couldn’t believe the inmates would masturbate in front of her during their evaluations. I wonder what she was expecting. They are incarcerated. Many of them have stopped caring.
In social worker years, I was required to take infants and toddlers to prisons to visit incarcerated parents. No strollers allowed, so I would have to carry them down long hallways. The things I heard will haunt me forever, and I tried my best to cover ears of those babies.
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I now want a undo/rewind button for my life so that I dont have to read this.
Great. Looking for something wholesome to read on BP at 11 pm and THIS comes up?
Not creepy, but I overheard it:
SCENE: I enter the bathroom at a bar and head to the urinal. GUY 1 is slumped in the stall over the toilet. GUY 2 pops his head in.
GUY 2: Hey Rocco, you okay?
GUY 1: Ugghhhh.... Yeah.
GUY 2: You sure Rocco?
GUY 1: Mmmmmm... Ugh... fine.
pause
GUY 2: Happy birthday Rocco.
pause
GUY 2: You sure you're okay?
GUY 1: DO I LOOK LIKE I'M F***ING OKAY!?!
Scene
"I love you, but I can't let you throw my baby out the window." Said by drunk redneck lady to her male companion at a hole in the wall Mexican restaurant. She kept repeating it to the man, still have no clue what events took place in their lives to lead up to that conversation.
While having breakfast one morning in 2015, at a pousada somewhere in the Northeast of Brazil, I overheard the British owner say the following to some of his friends:
"So in terms of the new law, even if the boy consents or seduces you, YOU can still be charged [...] if he was underage."
'So we were basically playing Russian roulette with the gun up my a**' said one police officer to the other...
I was babysitting my 4 year old cousin not too long ago. I had been fostering a mama cat and her litter of kittens.
The kid was playing with the kittens in my living room while I was cooking lunch and I overheard her singing "Gonna catch a kitty. Gonna have it for lunch." Over and over again.
Kids are creepy.
I regularly tell my cats I'm fattening them up for Thanksgiving.
A father is talking about his two daughters age 6 and 9.
Him: Yeah she has a body like a boy now but once she gets older, I'm sure she'll have a sexy body.
Everyone in the room: err
Him: Just like her mom, you know. I know if I was a boy their age that I would be trying to be really close friends with them.
overheard a crazy hippies plan to put a oz of shrooms into 4 separate brownies and feed them to someone he referred to as the son of satan
Two guys are talking next to me at a restaurant.
Guy 1: Dude, how do you decide if you take her to her place or your place?
Guy 2: It depends on how rough I want [it] to get.
Guy 1: What do you mean?
Guy 2: Well, if I get rough and we're at her place, she kicks me out and I have to go home in the middle of the night. If we're at my place, the girl can leave and I'm already in bed.
This kid sat behind me in a class for the better part of a year. One day he was talking about how he got suspended for having a journal filled with the names of people he wanted to kill and how he would do it.
His rationalization of it was "better than me actually killing them!"
That is true, but putting repeating thoguhts like this over and over, putting them in writinge etc is mentally extremely unhealthy.
Me and a friend went to the Krystal Burger on Bourbon Street one night to try and eat off our drunkness. While we're waiting for our food to come out, a younger homeless looking guy walks up to us with some sort of walkie-talkie looking thing. We had a nice little chat about his device:
Friend: "Hey man, that's a cool looking radio. What's it for?"
Guy: "I can listen to WHATEVER radio signals I WANT to from all OVER THE COUNTRY!"
Friend: "Oh, that's cool. What do you listen to? Police stations?"
Guy: "Yeah yeah...I can listen to them. That's no fun though. The BEST stuff is from hotel workers!"
We just kind of laugh at this point and stop talking to him, but crazy guy's found someone to talk to. He's not letting this go.
Guy: "This thing is SO powerful. I could tune in to any camera in the country right now. I COULD EVEN WATCH YOUR SISTER MENSTRUATE!!!"
At this point, everyone in the place gets wide-eyed and stares at the guy. Me and my friend just laugh and walk out of the place chomping on those delicious little burgers.
You are watching women menstruate all the time, Dude. It happens while we are out and about and it really not THAT spectacular.
One time I was in a public men's restroom. I was in a stall. I heard guy come in to the stall next to me. Right when he got in he says, "Mmm tasty." Then I heard the usual diarrhea fart sounds. Then he started to say, "Oh yeah!!! Oh f**k yeah!!! Oh yes!!!" He kept saying that for at least ten minutes. He sounded like he was having an orgasm while taking a s**t. The whole situation was so weird.
An you just stayed in there for 10 minutes listening to it all. What the hell is wrong with you?
I was playing in an underground poker room, everything was going smoothly. The table was fun and everyone was having a good time. Chips were flying around, jokes were being made, etc... There was this one older gentleman, probably around 65 years old who would always come by and buy in for the minimum. He mostly came to socialize and the poker was secondary.
The TV was on, and they were showing footage of some swimsuit competition or something. There was a gorgeous girl on the tv and naturally all of the table starting talking about how hot she was... Then the old guy turns to me and drops this one - "I would suck the s**t out of her a** with a straw."
Note: this post originally had 54 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
I have weird conversations with my friends that would be taken really weirdly out of context. And since I’m an author, I talk about killing off my characters and we get stuff like this: ME: I love her but I have to kill her. I have no choice. FRIEND: Ah I get that, I killed James the other day and I cried.
Overheard a young guy in the train saying to his friends how his niece was super hot and he'd totally bang her if she hadn't been his niece. To be honest, that's fair, but I'm still glad his friends all went silent and one of them said "Dude ... what?"
There's so many on this post that just pissed me off. Many should have been reported to the police. Just not a good post for morning reading.
I was in a Starbucks at a stool by the windows and I guess this pair were on a first date behind me on the sofa. They were pretty goth/punk like: all black, chains, spikes, obscure band shirts. The Convo went like this: Him: Did it hurt..? Her: Don't you dare finish that... Him: ..when Satan slapped you through the cracks of Hell!? I choked on my coffee.
Weirdest convo I ever heard was *me* after surgery: "Why are there little blue men with orange faces on my arm?" I heard a nurse snort-laugh really loud.... And when I cleared up, I looked at Hubby and said, "Please say you didn't record that." He didn't. FYI: It was the ink and Betadine marking the incision.
That's okay. I woke up to 6 nurses standing over me saying "no way is she 32" talking about how fit and pretty I am. Was really creeped the f**k out by that considering I just had a camera shoved down my throat to fix a hernia from acid reflux. 🙃
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the weirdest con i can think about right now always took place on the school bus person 1: if you are 100 pounds and eat 10 pounds of bread are you 10% bread? person 2: no you idiot you would poop it out they kept talking about this for quite some time. I have another one from the bus with the same people Girl: if someone were to rape me i would let them Boy: wouldn't that still be rape? Girl: no because i would be inviting them to have s*x with me Boy: but it would still be rape *more arguments about this topic* all of this happened in grade 7
If you're 90lbs and eat 10lbs of bread, you can - for a short time - be 10% bread.
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I've told this before. Once on a rather crowded bus, some white woman, clearly more than buzzed early afternoon, was sitting beside a black guy and going on and on about how much better (and bigger) black guys d!cks are, and how they have more stamina. He looked so uncomfortable. The entire bus did too, she wasn't quiet about this opinion at all.
A friend of mine said to her husband in a pub "I think we should go home know, it's late already and the baby has been alone nearly the whole day now..." Several people turned around quite briskly! Don't worry, guys, "the baby" in question is their cat. She's an old lady by now and can spend several hours napping or eating without supervision...
I was the overheard one: I once was on a Greyhound bus when a family member called me up and seriously told me they were going to kill themself. They’d been suicidal for some time. I spent the next 90 minutes talking them off the literal ledge, promising I’d be there soon, making them promise to wait for me - anything to keep them on the line. I tried to keep my voice down but still, I understand it’s disturbing stuff. 10 mins into my call the lady across the isle starts telling me “This is inappropriate. You have to get off the phone. I didn’t pay for a ticket to listen to this” and so on. I mean, I’m sorry, but AITA? I don’t think so … Long story short: Relative eventually got the right diagnosis & the right treatment and is living better than ever, more than 10 years on. I hope the lady on the bus is doing okay and found her compassion somewhere out there!
This kind of list always reminds me that I had a conversation here with an 11-year-old, and another with a 12-year-old. The fact that kids are reading this stuff may not phase you people, but it makes me really sad. Think before you post.
I've noticed that too, and yes, it bothers me. I have answered questions from kids here & did my best to be sensitive to their age & level of comprehension. However, kids being on here unsupervised is entirely up to the parents, it's their duty to monitor their children. And there will always be children who find ways to get online without the parents' knowledge. No one can monitor & censor the internet constantly. Oh, one other thing - the word you want in this context is 'faze', not phase.
Load More Replies... I have weird conversations with my friends that would be taken really weirdly out of context. And since I’m an author, I talk about killing off my characters and we get stuff like this: ME: I love her but I have to kill her. I have no choice. FRIEND: Ah I get that, I killed James the other day and I cried.
Overheard a young guy in the train saying to his friends how his niece was super hot and he'd totally bang her if she hadn't been his niece. To be honest, that's fair, but I'm still glad his friends all went silent and one of them said "Dude ... what?"
There's so many on this post that just pissed me off. Many should have been reported to the police. Just not a good post for morning reading.
I was in a Starbucks at a stool by the windows and I guess this pair were on a first date behind me on the sofa. They were pretty goth/punk like: all black, chains, spikes, obscure band shirts. The Convo went like this: Him: Did it hurt..? Her: Don't you dare finish that... Him: ..when Satan slapped you through the cracks of Hell!? I choked on my coffee.
Weirdest convo I ever heard was *me* after surgery: "Why are there little blue men with orange faces on my arm?" I heard a nurse snort-laugh really loud.... And when I cleared up, I looked at Hubby and said, "Please say you didn't record that." He didn't. FYI: It was the ink and Betadine marking the incision.
That's okay. I woke up to 6 nurses standing over me saying "no way is she 32" talking about how fit and pretty I am. Was really creeped the f**k out by that considering I just had a camera shoved down my throat to fix a hernia from acid reflux. 🙃
Load More Replies... the weirdest con i can think about right now always took place on the school bus person 1: if you are 100 pounds and eat 10 pounds of bread are you 10% bread? person 2: no you idiot you would poop it out they kept talking about this for quite some time. I have another one from the bus with the same people Girl: if someone were to rape me i would let them Boy: wouldn't that still be rape? Girl: no because i would be inviting them to have s*x with me Boy: but it would still be rape *more arguments about this topic* all of this happened in grade 7
If you're 90lbs and eat 10lbs of bread, you can - for a short time - be 10% bread.
Load More Replies... I've told this before. Once on a rather crowded bus, some white woman, clearly more than buzzed early afternoon, was sitting beside a black guy and going on and on about how much better (and bigger) black guys d!cks are, and how they have more stamina. He looked so uncomfortable. The entire bus did too, she wasn't quiet about this opinion at all.
A friend of mine said to her husband in a pub "I think we should go home know, it's late already and the baby has been alone nearly the whole day now..." Several people turned around quite briskly! Don't worry, guys, "the baby" in question is their cat. She's an old lady by now and can spend several hours napping or eating without supervision...
I was the overheard one: I once was on a Greyhound bus when a family member called me up and seriously told me they were going to kill themself. They’d been suicidal for some time. I spent the next 90 minutes talking them off the literal ledge, promising I’d be there soon, making them promise to wait for me - anything to keep them on the line. I tried to keep my voice down but still, I understand it’s disturbing stuff. 10 mins into my call the lady across the isle starts telling me “This is inappropriate. You have to get off the phone. I didn’t pay for a ticket to listen to this” and so on. I mean, I’m sorry, but AITA? I don’t think so … Long story short: Relative eventually got the right diagnosis & the right treatment and is living better than ever, more than 10 years on. I hope the lady on the bus is doing okay and found her compassion somewhere out there!
This kind of list always reminds me that I had a conversation here with an 11-year-old, and another with a 12-year-old. The fact that kids are reading this stuff may not phase you people, but it makes me really sad. Think before you post.
I've noticed that too, and yes, it bothers me. I have answered questions from kids here & did my best to be sensitive to their age & level of comprehension. However, kids being on here unsupervised is entirely up to the parents, it's their duty to monitor their children. And there will always be children who find ways to get online without the parents' knowledge. No one can monitor & censor the internet constantly. Oh, one other thing - the word you want in this context is 'faze', not phase.
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