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40 Posts About “Genius” Kids That Are So Clearly Lies, It’s Embarrassing (New Pics)
Parents are likely the most biased people when it comes to their children. Reasonably so—every achievement, no matter how big or small, seems special when it’s your kid. That might be one of the reasons moms and dads want to let the whole world know about it.
However, some of them take it one step too far, and make such accomplishments sound a little too impressive. Reddit’s 'Woke Kids' community boasts an entire collection of examples like this. We gathered them into another list covering children’s extraordinary behavior that just seems too good to be true. If you haven’t yet seen the first edition, make sure to check it out here.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Folding Laundry, Being Woke, And Cackling. Work Done
RELATED:
#2
It’s Mushier Than That
#3
Everyone Clapped And Asked For Consent
Cat Palmer 2 years ago
I can actually see this happening - kids have just had a (very important) lesson on the importance of consent, class joker decides to be funny, and you have a tweet ready to be sent.
#4
This Isnt The Most Unbelievable Thing, But
#5
Damn Right
#6
Daughter Starts A Whole Protest
#7
First Graders Are Known For Thought-Provoking Sociological Commentary
#8
Ballsy (Or ‘Flatsy’ Since Kiddo Is A Flat-Earther) Statement
#9
Kid Has Got A Point
Hotdogking 2 years ago (edited)
Depending on the age, a kid could’ve actually written this. However chances are if it was a kid they wrote it trying to be a smart a**e
#10
Under A Post About Stranger Things Using The Word “Eskimo”
#11
I Do Not Like This Mother
Cooking Panda 2 years ago
Wait until she sees barbie and comments on the nonsensical beauty standard
#12
And Then Everybody Clapped
#13
A Totally Real Question About Santa
#14
5yo Starts An Airline Business
Anyone-for-tea? 2 years ago
I can’t believe a 5 year old would say that. Source: I am 5 years old.
#15
Unattended 7yo At The Park
#16
Mom & Dad Please Ban Gas Stoves!!
Lakota Wolf 2 years ago
This looks exactly like how I wrote my cats' valentine's day cards "from" them to my ex - I wrote them with my non-dominant hand, with purposeful misspellings XD ...I'm 40
#17
Yep I Bet She Did
#18
Yeah For Some Reason I Doubt That
Rebekah Krause 2 years ago
Having been a nanny I buy this; seven-year-olds will use any excuse to start screaming about poop.. and annoyingly imitate obnoxious YouTube videos.
#19
And Then He Joined The Foreign Legion
#20
He's The Chosen One
Steve Robert 2 years ago
Son that guy from the church isn't God and where he touched you isn't your heart
#21
I Totally Believe Her Little Kid Said This. I Remember My Daughter’s First Words Were About The Socio-Political Landscape She Would Have To Overcome As A Woman
#22
Ok Then Jasper
#23
Grandma Made Up A Fake Homework Assignment To Own The Libs
#24
Of Course Emma Wrote That
#26
And All Of Gondor Clapped
#27
Mummy? Why Have I Got To Hold Up This Si-Just Shut Up And Keep Still! At Least Look At The Camera!!
Hotdogking 2 years ago
The look on the girl’s face clearly says “I’ve got no idea what this sign says but I’m holding it up for the picture because mummy promised me a new doll if I did”
#28
Okay
#29
What A Gentleman
Stephanie Did It 2 years ago
This makes me cringe so hard, I can only see the gas splashing back into his little eyes and mouth. This is child endangerment.
#30
Finally Found One In The Wild!
#31
Someone Ought To Tell This Kid('s Parent) That There Is One
#33
And Then All Of Their Future Therapists Clapped
Stardust she/her 2 years ago
I mean, I can see 13 year olds saying this. I also wanted to be able to not have kids at that age (still don’t want them)
#35
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up? Sued For Malpractice
Stephanie Did It 2 years ago
Don't worry Mom, growing up may not be an issue at all for your poor kid.
#36
Woke Breastfeeding
#37
I'm Sure She Picked It Out Herself
#38
It’s 4chan So It’s Already A Given That This Didn’t Happen, But
#39
Eight Year Old Kids Definitely Care About This Stuff
Lakota Wolf 2 years ago (edited)
What?! I saw the Lightyear movie and I don't think they portrayed Buzz as gay...? His friend Hawthorne was gay, and it was amazingly tastefully and properly portrayed. And even if they DID "turn" Buzz gay, why is that "wrong"? Why does that "ruin everything"? ughhhh it's 2023, why are we STILL on about homoesexuals "ruining everything"?
#41
Reminded Me Of This Subreddit
#42
Sure He Did 🙄
#43
Save Neil Young
Henrik Schmidt 2 years ago
That's some pretty amazing handwriting for a five year old! I wonder if maybe his mom had a hand in this?
#44
From A Dinosaur Group About The New Jurassic World:
Ches Yamada 2 years ago
Uhhh I might have said something similar at that age. Love dinosaurs, people? Not so much. I'd have been upset at the people and cheering for the dinos.
#45
Son Schools Teacher
#46
Okay Honey Whatever You Say
#47
Desperately Hoping I Haven't Eaten The Onion
Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago
He should have posted the rest of the conversation. I wanted to know this kid's thoughts on Nixon abandoning the gold standard.
#48
Real Conversation With Daughter
#49
One Of The Duggars
#50
A Kid Singing About Their Food Seems Plausible But This One Takes It Over The Top (X-Post From R/Thathappened)
#51
It Even Ends With And Then Everyone Clapped
SaneMinotaur (she/her) 2 years ago
Ah yes, the classic 'everyone clapped' line... makes every story so much more believable....
#52
Ummmm..yeah
Casey McAlister 2 years ago
So, when good white people read about colonization, slavery, genocide and massacres, they feel nice and comfortable? If you have to make up things your child said, at least think them through.
#53
A Future Proletarian Comrade
#54
Op Has Never Talked To A 4-Year-Old
#55
Found One In The Wild
#56
And Then Everyone Applauded
#57
Maybe If She Had Gone Vegan, Her Mother Would Still Be With Her
#58
Boy Eloquently Explains Why Kellogg's Is His Favorite Cereal
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What do you think ?
Lindilou 2 years ago
Most of these I do not believe and the rest I am amazed the parent is proud of the child.
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Loki's_Lil_Butterknife 2 years ago (edited)
The amount of people and patents in this listicle making false stories about their children for five minutes of Internet clout is just pitiful. What two your old is screaming out to bring down the patriarchy and fight climate change. I think I was just screaming for nap time and silly toys at that age.
Alexandra Davis 2 years ago
As a teacher I can see most of these actually being said by children. They are like sponges and absorb everything around them, and understand a lot more than we think. If a child grows up with family who are flat earthers, they will constantly be told that everyone else is wrong and silly and that the earth is flat. Equally if they are brought up in a household that teaches consent and respect, they will know all about that (plus it's taught in all the schools nowadays too) and it's very much seen as an important element in teens nowadays! This post more shows more that some adults (nice seeing lots of comments from people also saying the same as me) dismiss kids too quickly and don't think they have their own thoughts and take in more than we often give them credit for! Kids really do understand more than we often think they do, like when parents refuse to tell their children they're poorly or getting a divorce, the children will know/ know something is up and handle it more maturely
Cynthia Souza 2 years ago
These made me laugh. I'm a retired elementary teacher; thirty years with fourth and fifth graders. Anyone with ANY experience with kids knows most, probably all, of these are made-up bs.
Peta Hurley-Hill 2 years ago
Years ago, I was working as a teachers aid in a multi-age classroom. The kids had reading sheets to take home every night. Whatever they read the parents wrote down.We had one little boy who was in Prep very early and only 4.His Dad bought back his reading sheet ,where he had signed off on this little guy having read the first Harry Potter book in 3 days and telling me how he'd be starting the second book that nigh....He seemed to forget that I read and wrote with this kid every single day and was fully aware that he basically couldn't read anything besides a couple of words and could not even write his own name!! I just smiled and nodded at Dad, then continued to get his kid to spell out the word "DOG".
Moosy Girl 2 years ago
For all I know kids between 3 and 8 might well be saying all this stuff, I’ve been hearing loads of them talking daily at work for years and I still can’t make out what they’re saying 98% of the time.
Scorched Earth 1 year ago
People are so proud to be part of the world being burned down with all this woke s**t. It's basically suicide, and being happy to put that noose around their own neck.
Yu Pan 2 years ago
As someone who just spent one week with a 6-year-old, I can believe the ideas the kids are saying but not *exactly* the way they would say it. My nephew jumped from words to words and never a complete sentence. "So I went shoo-shoo-shoo, and then he like, and I like, and then it goes 'pooosh', and then--" that's how the conversation usually went.
Paige Booke Reed 2 years ago
most of these are actually believable, guys. I mean, when i was six i solved Einstein's theory of relativity, so... \s
Lindilou 2 years ago
Most of these I do not believe and the rest I am amazed the parent is proud of the child.
Load More Replies... Loki's_Lil_Butterknife 2 years ago (edited)
The amount of people and patents in this listicle making false stories about their children for five minutes of Internet clout is just pitiful. What two your old is screaming out to bring down the patriarchy and fight climate change. I think I was just screaming for nap time and silly toys at that age.
Alexandra Davis 2 years ago
As a teacher I can see most of these actually being said by children. They are like sponges and absorb everything around them, and understand a lot more than we think. If a child grows up with family who are flat earthers, they will constantly be told that everyone else is wrong and silly and that the earth is flat. Equally if they are brought up in a household that teaches consent and respect, they will know all about that (plus it's taught in all the schools nowadays too) and it's very much seen as an important element in teens nowadays! This post more shows more that some adults (nice seeing lots of comments from people also saying the same as me) dismiss kids too quickly and don't think they have their own thoughts and take in more than we often give them credit for! Kids really do understand more than we often think they do, like when parents refuse to tell their children they're poorly or getting a divorce, the children will know/ know something is up and handle it more maturely
Cynthia Souza 2 years ago
These made me laugh. I'm a retired elementary teacher; thirty years with fourth and fifth graders. Anyone with ANY experience with kids knows most, probably all, of these are made-up bs.
Peta Hurley-Hill 2 years ago
Years ago, I was working as a teachers aid in a multi-age classroom. The kids had reading sheets to take home every night. Whatever they read the parents wrote down.We had one little boy who was in Prep very early and only 4.His Dad bought back his reading sheet ,where he had signed off on this little guy having read the first Harry Potter book in 3 days and telling me how he'd be starting the second book that nigh....He seemed to forget that I read and wrote with this kid every single day and was fully aware that he basically couldn't read anything besides a couple of words and could not even write his own name!! I just smiled and nodded at Dad, then continued to get his kid to spell out the word "DOG".
Moosy Girl 2 years ago
For all I know kids between 3 and 8 might well be saying all this stuff, I’ve been hearing loads of them talking daily at work for years and I still can’t make out what they’re saying 98% of the time.
Scorched Earth 1 year ago
People are so proud to be part of the world being burned down with all this woke s**t. It's basically suicide, and being happy to put that noose around their own neck.
Yu Pan 2 years ago
As someone who just spent one week with a 6-year-old, I can believe the ideas the kids are saying but not *exactly* the way they would say it. My nephew jumped from words to words and never a complete sentence. "So I went shoo-shoo-shoo, and then he like, and I like, and then it goes 'pooosh', and then--" that's how the conversation usually went.
Paige Booke Reed 2 years ago
most of these are actually believable, guys. I mean, when i was six i solved Einstein's theory of relativity, so... \s
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