40 Posts About &#8220;Genius&#8221; Kids That Are So Clearly Lies, It&#8217;s Embarrassing (New Pics)

Anastasia Redmond 2 years ago

It's because everything of monetary value that could be carried away had already been stolen by Egyptians.

4points

Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago

We actually have a TV show here in Australia actually called "Stuff The British Stole". I don't expect the BBC will buy the rights to screen it.

26points

Huddo's sister 2 years ago

It's a pretty good show too

0points

Arwen Premium 2 years ago

This is an online meme, so pretty likely the kids did pick it up and say it.

23points

Fraxinus excelsior 2 years ago

Here comes the downvotes, but I'm sure Britain hasn't been the only nation to "steal" antiquities.

13points

Joroches 2 years ago

I think your right. We did steal loads of stuff and it should absolutely be given back but there are a lot of countries that did the same. All colonial countries should be held to account not just the funny meme ones.

11points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

I call this the "but he was also speeding, officer" excuse.

6points

featherytoad 2 years ago

Look what the Nazis did to all the Jewish people. They absolutely stole.

1point

Jp@nda 2 years ago

Aww it's almost like people don't like it when their country is singled out for something bad that they have no control over. I don't feel bad because the British like to think they're so much better than Americans.

0points

Alexandra Davis 2 years ago

It's quite a famous joke and if the kids had heard adults making it before, I can see how it could happen.

12points

Nea 2 years ago

Believable.

11points

Clown fish 2 years ago

Hey, we didn't steal everything! Takes a few sentences with me on the way out lol

9points

Con O Cuinn 2 years ago (edited)

Very possible. Kinda thing my aul fella would have taught me

7points

Francis 2 years ago

would be more believable if the older kid made the pun...

5points

Irish woman abroad 2 years ago

Kids folding laundry?? Bit of a giveaway from the start, to anyone still talking about the British stealing stuff

5points

Jaya 2 years ago

In my country kids have chores, it differs from family to family what kind of chores, but there are definitely families where the chores include folding a load of laundry. There's also families where kids and teenagers can earn some extra allowance when they do some extra chores, I did lots and lots of folding and ironing clothes as a teen to get some extra money.

0points

#2

It’s Mushier Than That

Final score:

116points

POST

Helena 2 years ago

Maybe. I can see an 8 year old saying that

61points

xcooba 2 years ago

Not a chance

30points

A Wild Bean 2 years ago

Maybe more like "hey why are math and science different classes? It's kinda the same thing. It's, like, mushy. My classes are mushy. Hey mom.. mom.. MOM did you hear me, I said it's mushy? Isn't that funny?" (This is what 8-year-old-me talked like, anyway)

20points

Nea 2 years ago (edited)

Yes, i feel the parent wrote it more articulately and coherently than what she might have said but the thought could be a child’s.

15points

Alexandra Davis 2 years ago

As a teacher I can too. Kids are more clever than many give credit for!

7points

N Miller 2 years ago

Yup. My nibling is this articulate and has her 8th birthday later this week. She's surrounded by adults more than kids her own age (blame lockdown), and she's endlessly curious. She's learned to mimic adult speech patterns. Then, when she plays with her cousins (aged 6-9) we are reminded she's still a child.

6points

OMGhonestly 2 years ago

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ChariotLee 2 years ago

My brother's eight. I have yet to hear him speak of anything other than Pokémon.

13points

Cara G 2 years ago

Except that this child is correct. Music does incorporate mathematics; counting, rhythm, recognition and repetition of patterns, 4/4 timing needs to be universally understood as 4 beats per measure/4 measures per line, and so on. Despite the fact that music is unquestionably an artform, the way it is notated is decidedly mathematical. And math is the science of both structure and of change, seeking to identify and compute equations for those patterns.

4points

Loki's_Lil_Butterknife 2 years ago

Why in the world are people downvoting you for stating a fact.

3points

The Original Bruno 2 years ago

Not saying music is math, but it might help to understand that music notes are great example of a logarithmic scale. (One octave's notes are double the frequency of the same notes one octave lower; Pleasing intervals are those that closely resonate; the higher note in a 5th interval vibrates 3 times for every 2 times the lower note vibrates, etc.)

4points

Anastasia Redmond 2 years ago

Why not ask Beethoven?

0points

rob 2 years ago

Because they separate it and try to explain it in an orderly way it's made "so we can't understand anything"? But yeah end result the world is mushier and many subjects are in reality intertwined is correct...

4points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

That's pretty observant by an eight year old. But it's true

2points

Natalia Shoemark 2 years ago

That's actually on to it..

2points

Cuppa tea? 2 years ago

Music isn't math. Kiddo knows Tool Lateralus.

1point

Lesley Zed 2 years ago

That child is absolutely correct.👍🏻

0points

Cthulhu Kitty 2 years ago

Wiritng music is a form of math

0points

#3

Everyone Clapped And Asked For Consent

Final score:

112points

POST

Cat Palmer 2 years ago

I can actually see this happening - kids have just had a (very important) lesson on the importance of consent, class joker decides to be funny, and you have a tweet ready to be sent.

87points

Joel Blue 2 years ago

She doesn’t indicate ages either, so this could be high school students for all we know.

33points

Jaya 2 years ago (edited)

In the comments on the original post, she says it's a 18 year old and that the joke already circulated online as well. But even if it didn't, teenagers nowadays get taught about consent in sex ed, so it's not weird if he came up with it himself. She never said the boy was a young kid. (or are there cultures where you can't use the word boy for older teenagers?)

11points

The Original Bruno 2 years ago

Not even bragging about their child! Just laughing at something funny another child said!

6points

Renee Stephens 2 years ago (edited)

So far, I can see most of theses happening. Plus, she doesn't say how old the students were.

3points

Natalia Shoemark 2 years ago

Haha nice one!

3points

Danielle Slade 2 years ago

This should be higher

2points

ImSayu 2 years ago

Is true tho....

0points

Shawn Barry 2 years ago

yes, men would appreciate being asked for consent as well. it's a show of respect in an area where we are almost always taken for granted

0points

Diandra “Mss Didi” Blackthorn 2 years ago

Now that's good parenting!

0points

Vermontah 2 years ago

my daughter used to sing commercials around the house. She was singing I'm and FDS woman until I told her what the product was.

0points

#4

This Isnt The Most Unbelievable Thing, But

Final score:

112points

POST

waddles 2 years ago (edited)

i think i saw this on a “funny things kids say list” on here

69points

Shyla Bouche 2 years ago

Funny things kids roar? I mean, how do we know it was funny? I don't speak dinosaur. Maybe the kid was just asking for a plate of people nuggets.

17points

SaneMinotaur (she/her) 2 years ago

I can actually believe this one, tbh. That is a very 5y/o thing to do.

41points

Bart 2 years ago

Com'on, this is not hard to believe. I have a 2y old who roars at everyone who says the word dinosaur, even at the TV 😂

31points

Bart 2 years ago

BTW, I totally blame Peppa Pig for this one

10points

LK 2 years ago

This is totally believable to me. It's the sort of thing my children would have done.

19points

rob 2 years ago

Somehow the most believable things on the list

15points

Ches Yamada 2 years ago

Okay. I barked at people when I was little they'd coo "oh she's so cute" or some bs and I'd bark and say "I'M A DOG" so yeah.

10points

Me 2 years ago

This is definitely something my four year old daughter would do

9points

Lizz 2 years ago

Very proud of your daughter!

6points

Loki's_Lil_Butterknife 2 years ago

This, unlike the many other posts on this thread is at least believable. I can totally see a five year old doing this.

2points

Blue Strawberry 2 years ago

I LOVED dinosaurs when I was little.I knew all of the names of them. And I’m a girl.

1point

#5

Damn Right

Final score:

112points

POST

Benhur Tan 2 years ago

i think a second grader should learn their manners

114points

magix (they/them) 2 years ago

they should also not use slurs.

39points

Luca Corradini 2 years ago

i think grown ups should know the basic of their native language

3points

Kaylynn Willprecht 2 years ago

i think a second grader is correct

2points

TheElementalGod️️ 2 years ago

And they should learn to capitalize their 'I's if they are gonna correct peoples grammar

1point

PeppershakerPros 2 years ago

not when adults old enough to be their parents are dumb enough to not know that "you're" is a contraction of "you" and "are"

0points

Vanessa Dines 2 years ago

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Rostit . 2 years ago

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Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

That's one word that even a "second-grader" knows better than to use.

29points

Rostit . 2 years ago

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blackberrycobbler 2 years ago

I think a second grader shouldn’t use slurs.

9points

Shayne Randlett 2 years ago

Soooo...your "second grader" knows the difference between your and you're, but doesn't understand that the first letter in a sentence as well as the "i" in "I'm" should be capitalized? Not to mention that the last word in their statement is NOT OKAY? That's not parenting I would brag about...

9points

Moosy Girl 2 years ago

I think the capitalisation police needs to look into this comment.

7points

Lizz 2 years ago

Yowch! But he does have a point

7points

fin the frog 2 years ago

so bp censor a*****e but they dont censor literal slurs?

6points

LokisLilButterknife 2 years ago (edited)

They also censored d**k.

2points

Nea 2 years ago

I wont brag about this comment.

6points

maswartz 2 years ago

Wait, seriously BP, you didn't censor that one?

5points

Joe Smith 2 years ago (edited)

But BP won't censor that word? BP will censor butt, but allows re***ded? I see how it is.

5points

#6

Daughter Starts A Whole Protest

Final score:

90points

POST

Sara Cros 2 years ago

I could believe this

96points

Jill Rhodry 2 years ago

Yeah, me too - I don't think this necessarily belongs here.

23points

Jordi Sharpe 2 years ago

Greta Thunberg wasn't much older when she started organizing. This is believable.

8points

Bart 2 years ago

Indeed, 12y olds can definitely do this...

7points

S Mi 2 years ago

I did something pretty similar to this. I was about 13.

3points

Jeweled Dragon (She/They) 2 years ago

Me too. One of my friends planned and successfully executed a walk-out of our high school in protest of the repealing of Roe v. Wade, and there has been a BLM rally at my school for a similar reason as the one by OP

1point

Taryn Spencer 2 years ago

Something similar happened at a Jr. High, expect it was for a teacher that was assaulting kids, mostly girls

1point

Anastasia Redmond 2 years ago

I would love to know more. Saw some students protesting at school rules about big hair being covered or kept down in class because it blocks the view of students behind them. It was highly racist of the students to claim that only black girls could have big hair. Dolly Parton, Roy wood. Big hair is universal. Anyone can style it. I would have been in the next day with some friends looking like an 80s hair metal band.

0points

Irish woman abroad 2 years ago

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Donkey boi 2 years ago

To be fair, I was leading strikes at school at 12. This could have happened.

12points

Molly Whuppie 2 years ago (edited)

yeah this is provable, so probably did happen, all it would take is a different parent on the friends list who lives nearby checking if their own kids saw it. most parent tweets/lies are not provable by anyone.

7points

Tameeza Joyce Lightowler 2 years ago (edited)

This I DO believe. Look at Greta Thunberg and what she's been through and achieved at such a young age.

6points

Lee Banks 2 years ago

yup. I apparently staged a grade two walk out of gym class because the teacher gave the boys 3/4 of the basketball court, and first dibs on anything but jumpropes.. Very little recollection, but all adults involved say it happened.

6points

Androgyny Lunacy 2 years ago

Why is this unbelievable, exactly?

5points

DC 2 years ago

May be true. When I was 12, I'd have taken ANY reason to riot, because although not that much understanding, but a hate for the system, was already planted from first day in school on...

5points

Lizz 2 years ago

Sounds like something I would've done as a kid

3points

Asphalt Bubblegum 2 years ago

Nah, I call BS on this one. Can't get most adults to do this because it requires advance development of the prefrontal cortex and an altruistic empathy for others and the world at-large. Also, you can't get that many kids out of class at the same time short of a fire drill.

2points

Cal the dragon (she/her) 2 years ago

You go girl!

2points

#7

First Graders Are Known For Thought-Provoking Sociological Commentary

Final score:

72points

POST

Sad Quokka 2 years ago

I've often wondered the same

81points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

There is one for men. It goes "Dude, Mr., Sir". XD (joke)

22points

Karin Jansen 2 years ago

That's why feminists in the 70's rallied to stop the usage of the Dutch word for miss ("juffrouw / mejuffrouw"). It worked, now the only word used is misses ("mevrouw"), except for teachers somehow, who are all called juffrouw, married or not 🤔.

8points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

This is the case in the US too. Teachers are always miss now. Not sure why. In my daughter's kindergarten though the teachers were just called Teacher. So it would be Teacher Anne or Teacher Jakob. I live in a predominantly Quaker area, so it may be a Quaker thing.

4points

Jiří Petruželka 2 years ago

That's because traditionally it's expected that a man will be the one ask a woman out and these words are to indicate if she's married or not

1point

That emo Girl 2 years ago

I second

0points

Lee Banks 2 years ago

I'll bite. Aside from the "wild " part, my mom and I had the same conversation, at the same age.

10points

un-izzy 2 years ago

Yeah, I actually remembered thinking the same when I started school at about 4 - I had some teachers who were Miss, some were Mrs, some were Mr and my mum got bills addressed as Ms. So I dunno.

7points

GEPowers 2 years ago

Women didn't generally approach or initiate relationships with men in days gone by, so Miss/Mrs help keep men from bothering married women. You go back far enough and apparently only women could commit adultery. So a man's marital status was not deemed important (or incriminating) enough to warrant a title.

5points

Casey McAlister 2 years ago

Maybe those are the husband's words?

5points

Brittany Howard 2 years ago

This was my thought, too.

0points

Jo Jones 2 years ago

I’m inclined to believe a child would question that, just not with these words ;)

3points

Vasana Phong 2 years ago

There was a backstory of this, just can’t remember

3points

rob 2 years ago

Master and mistress. A woman could be a mrs without being married in the past. Not until after the 1900s the meaning changed.

6points

Fxnglhl 2 years ago

in school we call female teachers 'Ms' regardless of if they're married or not.

1point

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

Good.

0points

Tams21 2 years ago

In Germany Fräulein used to be their version of Miss but stopped being used in the 70s. The word Frau (literally meaning woman) now gets used, regardless of marital status. I don't see any reason this can't happen in the English language.

1point

René Sauer 2 years ago

I think I read somewhere that there actually were such words for man. They just fell out of use for some reason.

1point

Eva Gaberscek 2 years ago

When my father was a child he got laughed at for calling a woman selling potatoes on the market mrs. She wasn't a lady back than...

1point

#8

Ballsy (Or ‘Flatsy’ Since Kiddo Is A Flat-Earther) Statement

Final score:

70points

POST

Sad Quokka 2 years ago

Upvote for the title

45points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

What's scarier - the fact that a mom wrote this pretending to be her 3rd grader, or the fact that, if this was real, a 3rd grader is already using "u" in place of "you"? XD

27points

Terry Tobias 2 years ago

I know, right!

0points

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

The kid isn't a flat-earther, just has idiot parents.

27points

Tameeza Joyce Lightowler 2 years ago

😂😂😂 Love it!!!

3points

Irish woman abroad 2 years ago

People brainwashing their kids like this is scary. What's next, a return to a medieval system of fiefdom? Burning scientists at the stake? These parents need a dose of science-based reality.

8points

Alexandra Davis 2 years ago

Again, if this is something the kid has heard from its environment at home, I can easily see this being something they would write. Children are like sponges, they listen to and absorb a lot more than many people think. As a teacher I would be shocked sometimes at the views kids had until I realised they were just what they were hearing at home and it's why unbiased, facterly correct teaching is needed so much, to break the cycles of incorrect information being passed down the generations!

6points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

Can you smell that? Are we near a field of cows?

6points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

You can tell who his parents voted for. And unfortunately he'll grow up without the critical thinking skills needed to determine who is really telling him the truth.

4points

Natalia Shoemark 2 years ago

Bet that kid didn't even get to know Santa!

3points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

I'm always happy to put these people into a spaceship and lob them off the earth to take a good look. I mean, a good look during an untethered spacewalk.

1point

ZuriLovesYou 1 year ago

That poor kid.

0points

#9

Kid Has Got A Point

Final score:

64points

POST

Hotdogking 2 years ago (edited)

Depending on the age, a kid could’ve actually written this. However chances are if it was a kid they wrote it trying to be a smart a**e

71points

Got hacked lol 2 years ago

well he isnt wrong

6points

Adam Zad 2 years ago

That's the kind of answer I would have given in elementary school.

2points

A Nelson 2 years ago

Sorry, I call BS. It's in cursive. Not just any cursive, lazy adult cursive lol

2points

Mulberry Juice 2 years ago

If the kid is a teen, their handwriting might actually be like this

3points

Esme Weatherwax 2 years ago

I learned cursive writing in yr 6

1point

PlatinumTheCat 2 years ago

We learned cursive in third grade, and being messy makes it seem even more like it’s a kid

0points

Wondering Alice 2 years ago

I can believe this is a kid's handwriting.

0points

Kaitlyn Lindsay 2 years ago

No that's "I'm a lazy kid who doesn't want to pick up the pen between letters" writing. My kids looks just like it and never learned cursive 😆

0points

Deidre Lippnik 2 years ago

Actually most textbooks and workbooks are made at factories with sustainable forests these days...-2 points

1point

Caleb 2 years ago

Suspiciously good handwriting...

0points

XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦 🇬🇧 2 years ago

I can see this, especially if they are learning about ecological footprints and the environment

0points

YARETZI JIMENEZ CHAVARRIA 2 years ago

Smart a*s kid

0points

Kaitlyn Lindsay 2 years ago

My kid would 100% make a smart a comment like this.

0points

R F 2 years ago

To be fair, this is exactly the answer I would have given at six to now.

0points

Dork Pool 2 years ago

Paper comes from tree farms and completely renewable. Not hardwood Forrest. Kid failed that one. Sorry.

0points

#10

Under A Post About Stranger Things Using The Word “Eskimo”

Final score:

61points

POST

waddles 2 years ago

i love that chart

109points

Shyla Bouche 2 years ago

The chart is okay, but would have been greatly improved by "no, but in purple."

4points

Persephone hates Pomegranate 2 years ago

As an Alaskan learning Unangax̂, not all Native Alaskans are Inuit. They are divided into three groups: the Aleuts, the Inuit, and the many different Indian tribes. Many live on our islands.

33points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

Thank you for sharing! I grew up in the 80s/90s when our education system taught us to refer to the indigenous people of Alaska as "Eskimos" and the indigenous people of mainland America as "Indians". I believe it's important to hear from the peoples themselves as to how we should properly refer to and address them.

18points

majandess 2 years ago

Is there a recommendation for if we don't know the tribe?

4points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

True, but a 10 year old would hear, Eskimo is offensive, they are Inuit. Then just repeat that. They won't have the full context of the various tribes in Alaska. The joke of course is that deciding that all native Alaskans are Inuit is just as dumb as deciding they are all Eskimos.

4points

XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦 🇬🇧 2 years ago

The only Native Alaskans I know are Yupik, and prefer Eskimo instead of Inuit. Not sure if that is typical?

1point

Ana Ferreira 2 years ago

If someone taught them at some point that the word eskimo was incorrect, they might say this, even a younger kid probably would.

16points

A Wild Bean 2 years ago

*screenshots pie chart for later use*

7points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

Same

3points

Con O Cuinn 2 years ago

And a lot of native North Americans prefer Eskimo since Inuit isn't right for them either

6points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago (edited)

hmm I've taught my kids already to use the endonyms for countries/nations/demographic groups rather than their imposed names (eskimo = "eater of raw meat", apparently). So their default is Inuit. However I have also pointed out to them that there are other tribes, unfortunately I am ignorant of the exact differences. I was aware of Aleuts (Thanks Persephone) but not others. In Africa it is the same, English-speaking people come here and indiscriminately refer to "blacks" whereas we have hundreds of tribes, and some of them are remarkably different in appearance. Compare for example the !Xam to the AmaZulu.

4points

Persephone hates Pomegranate 2 years ago

Glad to know I helped!

2points

Terri Martin 2 years ago

Yes , but this show was based on the 80's... different times.

3points

Timbob 2 years ago

I’m a Polak!

1point

PeppershakerPros 2 years ago

it takes place in the 80s, ofc the characters are gonna use language that isn't 100% pc

0points

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

An 10 year old is perfectly capable of saying this.

0points

#11

I Do Not Like This Mother

Final score:

61points

POST

Cooking Panda 2 years ago

Wait until she sees barbie and comments on the nonsensical beauty standard

162points

Elin Sandman 2 years ago

LMAO!!

7points

Lindilou 2 years ago

Or not.

4points

Addy Nimbus 2 years ago

*chefs kiss*

1point

That emo Girl 2 years ago

Barbie's are stupid tho. I've got acne and I'm considered pretty

0points

Anastasia Redmond 2 years ago

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Jo Jones 2 years ago

Second thing she said was “ All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident” And then she ran a marathon and wrote a book on logic of human destiny

50points

Auntie Bear 2 years ago

And then everyone clapped

27points

TXT_ 2 years ago

I'm pretty sure she does not even speak full sentences.

33points

Lyyyy 2 years ago

I’m sure she said ”Mommy, I want toy”

24points

Elaine N 2 years ago

The next thing she will probably say is: ‘ it’s not the atmosphere, it’s the atmosflat’

29points

Cara G 2 years ago

Spat out my coffee!!! 🤣

2points

Roger9er 2 years ago

Omg...that flat earth nonsense has to stop

15points

Marcos Valencia 2 years ago

Everybody in the store clapped... probably.

10points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

More likely the kid is saying "Wassat?"

6points

Rostit . 2 years ago

No she didn't.

5points

Clown fish 2 years ago

Wow this child speaks well for a 1yr old

3points

Biliegh they/them 2 years ago

I don't believe that baby said that

3points

rob 2 years ago

I think that's the point of this topic.

5points

#12

And Then Everybody Clapped

Final score:

61points

POST

Cooking Panda 2 years ago

No,that's probably bleach. Somebody was murdered here.

101points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago (edited)

No, no. White privilege smells like Axe body spray. (joke! I like how Axe/etc smells. I use Old Spice deodorant, and I'm female XD )

11points

Rebekah Krause 2 years ago

Hahaha “somebody was murdered here”. Sorry, but I am going to steal this and use it anytime. Someone asks “what’s that smell?”

10points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

You're snarkey. I like that.

1point

René Sauer 2 years ago

seriously, why do parents do this? They can´t actually think that somebody believes this BS and is impressed, right?

18points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

Idk, this does seem like something a kid would hear on YouTube, or from their adults, and then repeat in totally inappropriate situations. The stuff my seven year old says where I have to ask where did you hear that?

3points

rob 2 years ago

What does white privilege smell like? Modern buzz words seeping in everywhere .

13points

Niki A 2 years ago

If your kids talk like this, it's time for you to reconsider how you talk.

6points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

*Lets out a silent fart* "Nah, that's your moms cooking"

6points

Terri Martin 2 years ago

Smells more like 🐂💩 to me 😒

4points

RoanTheMad 2 years ago

*sniff sniff* does the air always smell like b******t?

4points

Irish woman abroad 2 years ago

I feel I should add, before I get diwnvoted, that I snorte at the thought of a 6 yo saying this.

3points

Irish woman abroad 2 years ago

Actually snorted at this one 😂😂

2points

Chilli 1 year ago

can confirm, i was the air.

1point

#13

A Totally Real Question About Santa

Final score:

58points

POST

Helena 2 years ago

Katie was telling a joke. I highly doubt we were supposed to take that literally, given who she is.

89points

General Anaesthesia 2 years ago (edited)

She isn't world famous, though. She's a congress person from California (google), is she known in all the US?

4points

GayPenguin 2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

GayPenguin 2 years ago

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Cyber Returns 2 years ago

The kid is 35 and taking meth

5points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

Katie has a good sense of humor.

4points

Jane March 2 years ago

This one is honestly just a joke

1point

boone williams 2 years ago

We've never told our kids to believe in Santa (or not to, we're santagnostic I guess) but I have also hypocritically started the tradition that any time someone sings a Christmas song before black Friday or after new years that Santa eats an elf. So there's that.

1point

Kerry Schultz 2 years ago

my husband literally asked this of his mother when he was little. if santa made all the toys how could he get his branded licensed star wars toys? she honestly tried to explain how santa was able to outsource some operations or something

1point

YARETZI JIMENEZ CHAVARRIA 2 years ago

How old was this child!?

1point

Kaylynn Willprecht 2 years ago

bro santa should be in jail he has committed too many crimes

0points

rs_adahl1971 2 years ago

Time to come clean lol

0points

Timbob 2 years ago

Helena, who is she ?

0points

#14

5yo Starts An Airline Business

Final score:

58points

POST

Anyone-for-tea? 2 years ago

I can’t believe a 5 year old would say that. Source: I am 5 years old.

99points

Rebekah Krause 2 years ago

Someone is bringing the funny.

16points

Mi So 2 years ago

Knowing what comes out of my nephews’ mouths, this is one I can absolutely believe!

16points

Ryan Edwards 2 years ago (edited)

Pilot (to my 5-year-old black son): Do you know you could clean the plane when you grow up? Pilot (to my 10-year-old gay son): Do you know you could be a flight attendant when you grow up? Pilot (to my 8-year-old developmentally challenged child): Did you know you'll be a burden to the world when you grow up? As much as I despise the prevalence of rampant homophobia, transphobia, sexism, racism, ableism, any-kind-of crapism ... I HATE when idiots try to fuel the flames with overt falsities. The world is already crappy enough as it is. But, there is a TON of good out there too. Let's inflate the GOOD STUFF instead.

14points

Domi 2 years ago (edited)

Of course she could. I wish her that.

6points

RoanTheMad 2 years ago

or she could be the one flying it , why tf she gotta just be a flight attendant?

3points

Dork Pool 2 years ago

Pretty sure the pilot didn't say that. This is fictional "patriarchy".

6points

Guy Lombardo 2 years ago

This kid is going to go far in life!

2points

Mary Peace 2 years ago

This kid is going to FLY far in life!

0points

Sharon Thomas 2 years ago

I took my step Grandaughter, also 5 years old to work with me and showed her the bosses office. He had a long window on one side with a wide ledge. On that ledge, he had displayed toy tractors and farm equipment. She looked at it, turned to me and said, “I thought the boss would be a woman”. Made me proud

1point

Cuppa tea? 2 years ago

Give or take it will be in 20 years time, the prospect of owning a plane is probably as remote as owning a car.

1point

Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago

Or I could be the pilot, would make more sense to me coming from a kid.

0points

I just work here 2 years ago

LIAR!

0points

#15

Unattended 7yo At The Park

Final score:

56points

POST

𝓚𝓮𝓲𝓽𝓱 2 years ago

Idk if it’s true but 😂

37points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

I believe this. I had a kid tell me I was going to hell because I was divorced and remarried. He told my wife and I that we were sinners and going to hell. His grandmother looked quite proud of herself. I said, cool, can't wait to see you there. It wasn't an effective comeback. He just said "no you won't".

13points

Printerman 2 years ago

I don't normally support bursting a kids bubble, but if the kid's bubble is full of hate, then that sucker needs to be burst wide TF open.

7points

Chilli 1 year ago

Hoping this actually happened.

1point

sylvantic 2 years ago

Can y’all stop painting all religious people under one brush? Plenty of Christians aren’t like this, and newsflash Christianity isn’t the only religion. I’m religious, my religion doesn’t support doing this (maybe some minority sects do, but not the majority), and me believing in G-d doesn’t make me a bad person (I’m also not Christian)

1point

Terri Martin 2 years ago

Fact. Santa, the Easter Bunny and God were all made up to make children behave.

1point

René Sauer 2 years ago

*lol* In the 1-to-1,000,000,000 chance of me ever getting a child, that´s how I would raise him: God doesn´t exist.

1point

Rachel Hamrick 2 years ago

That's why you don't need a child.

0points

ZuriLovesYou 1 year ago

I think you're both wrong.

0points

Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago

Riiiiight -

0points

Blue Strawberry 2 years ago

Wait, what?!

0points

Cathleen Day 2 years ago

I wish I could upvote this more!

0points

#16

Mom & Dad Please Ban Gas Stoves!!

Final score:

54points

POST

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

This looks exactly like how I wrote my cats' valentine's day cards "from" them to my ex - I wrote them with my non-dominant hand, with purposeful misspellings XD ...I'm 40

22points

Elsie Flandrin-Jones 2 years ago

This is faker than Kim Kardashian

12points

Dani Pret 2 years ago

I see fake. Nothing wrong with gas cooking unless the area isn't ventilated them the kid had a point!

12points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

there's lately been a big flap in the usa about using gas to cook. Because apparently electricity (made in potentially coal-fired non-clean power stations), is cleaner than gas. In my country we have barely enough electricity to power the country an entire day (it usually goes down). So... no chance of us ditching gas anytime soon.

8points

Lady Miss Pie Premium 2 years ago

This is so ridiculous, that’s obviously written by an adult trying to make it look like a child’s writing

9points

Irish woman abroad 2 years ago

Anyone who's ever seen a small child's writing knows this is fake!

6points

RoanTheMad 2 years ago

get an extractor fan, problem solved and you don't have to pander to this bs. I just had my kitchen remodelled and chose a gas hob because all the electric ones were those s****y "induction" hobs that you need special pans for, and can only have so much running at once. Like.. you couldn't use all 4 rings. Wtf was the point? So I went gas. Much better.

4points

Joshua David 2 years ago

Social media turned people into this.

4points

Suzy Creamcheese 2 years ago

No. Social media just gave people like this a soap box.

6points

The Original Bruno 2 years ago

If this IS a kid, can you imagine the level of abuse that their "education" consists of? Who told them that their kids gas stove is killing them? Ya know, rather than making sure that they are vented?

3points

Sam Backus 2 years ago

If this is in reference to gas stoves, this child is being lied to. No surprise though.

2points

René Sauer 2 years ago

I wouldn´t want gas stoves in my house either. But that's because I am low key afraid of it when something goes wrong...

2points

#17

Yep I Bet She Did

Final score:

52points

POST

Yali-girl with weird name 2 years ago

Wtf

76points

That emo Girl 2 years ago

I second that

1point

Phobrek 2 years ago

And everyone in Africa formerly dominated by the British Empire clapped?

36points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

OP probably did that himself... and is too embarrassed to have done it, as a grown-a*s man, when he should just embrace the nerd. Sooo he pretended his daughter did it XD

13points

René Sauer 2 years ago

I never understood why people idolize royals or other celebrities. Unless you are british she was just another woman like millions of women on the world.

6points

Anastasia Redmond 2 years ago

She served in WWII against the nazis. Tell my this is bad, why it should not be respected?

6points

Irish woman abroad 2 years ago

🙄🤦🤦🤦

3points

Tami Alizzi 2 years ago

Your child might have missed a few key points made by Black Panther.

2points

peithecelt 2 years ago

As a nerd and... Complicated follower of the royal family, I would have taken that as an opportunity to discuss what co-opting such a beautiful African kingdom (even if fantasy) with the British royal family is... Complicated.

2points

Terri Martin 2 years ago

Wait, what?

2points

ƒιѕн 2 years ago

Oh my...

1point

ZuriLovesYou 1 year ago

What?

0points

#18

Yeah For Some Reason I Doubt That

Final score:

46points

POST

Rebekah Krause 2 years ago

Having been a nanny I buy this; seven-year-olds will use any excuse to start screaming about poop.. and annoyingly imitate obnoxious YouTube videos.

78points

That emo Girl 2 years ago

I hate those YouTube videos. Especially clickbait thumbnail ones

3points

David Martin 2 years ago

Because it's never too early for kids to learn you can ignore the speed limit and face zero consequences for your actions

8points

Sad Quokka 2 years ago

🤣 gold

8points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago (edited)

Doesn't work. My son actually had to pee, and was trying to get him to the bathroom, got pulled over and explained why. Cops held me there for an hour before giving me a ticket. My son had to sit in his own p**s the whole time crying. He was five. Maybe this would work for white people, but not us.

6points

Timbob 2 years ago

And you approved???

1point

Joshua David 2 years ago

This parent has literal issues. Attention and lack of things to do issues.

1point

Unpopular opinions 2 years ago

Maybe don’t teach kids to be manipulative liars.

0points

#19

And Then He Joined The Foreign Legion

Final score:

44points

POST

Dani Pret 2 years ago

Never said that

69points

I just work here 2 years ago

Especially since "In a world of...be a..." is a grownup phrase. No child has that concept.

4points

James016 2 years ago

One for the Didn't Happen Of The Year awards

16points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

I'm proud to say my younger kids have no idea who Will Smith or Volodymyr Zelenskyy are. I'm less proud to say they do know a bunch of Minecraft and Roblox YouTubers. But they don't need to know about war and human suffering just yet. Let them have their childhood. By teenager knows, who Zelenskyy is but I doubt he'd say something like this.

12points

Premislaus de Colo 2 years ago

Of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most

7points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

I doubt it.

3points

Ginger Ghost 2 years ago

what does this mean, in a world of [comedians], be a [comedian], in a world of [actors], be a [politician], in a world of [black men] be a [white man], in a world of [celebrities], be a [world leader]. what are they trying to compare??

1point

Timbob 2 years ago

Honey, not everybody can be a comedian.

1point

Androgyny Lunacy 2 years ago

Lol

1point

Kaylynn Willprecht 2 years ago

he probs heard it at school

0points

Asher Tye 2 years ago

That doesn't even make sense

0points

#20

He's The Chosen One

Final score:

44points

POST

Steve Robert 2 years ago

Son that guy from the church isn't God and where he touched you isn't your heart

15points

Lauren S 2 years ago

At a new church we started this month, they have a kid time where they all go up front. The pastor told a story about Jesus on a mountain and asked the kids what part had never happened to them. My 6 year old said, “hiking”. Well, true. We’ve never taken him hiking. (They were looking for the light glowed from Jesus part). There was another question about what happened to Jesus and my kid said, “He got killed.” Also, not the answer they were looking for. Also, no idea where he learned that Jesus got killed. We just started taking him to church.

7points

Lauren S 2 years ago

@OliverKlozof, it actually really did happen just yesterday. My kid is a hoot. I have dozens of hilarious and heartwarming stories that are way more unbelievable than this one. I’ve shared several of them before on here like when he opened a pen!s store. I think that was one of the funniest ones.

1point

wyngerd 2 years ago

I think forcing 4 year olds to participate in any religious practice should be a felony.

4points

Natalia Shoemark 2 years ago

Beautiful!!

3points

Der Kommissar 2 years ago

Wait till the kid finds out Santa, The Easter Bunny and god aren't real

2points

DC 2 years ago

... undn Inspektor? Da gibs a kaan...

0points

Mary Peace 2 years ago

People at Church say this, so he could be saying what he heard.

1point

Jung Taekwoon 2 years ago

He touches me in my a s s sometimes. It’s weird all around.

1point

JE Cummings 2 years ago

Still doesn't make me want to go to church.

1point

R F 2 years ago

I believe this. That’s what the spew in Sunday school. Parroting is definitely a child mindset.

1point

Androgyny Lunacy 2 years ago

🤣 😆 🤣 Seriously?...

1point

#21

I Totally Believe Her Little Kid Said This. I Remember My Daughter’s First Words Were About The Socio-Political Landscape She Would Have To Overcome As A Woman

Final score:

42points

POST

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

You forgot to mention that she is three.

72points

Lollipop Girl 2 years ago

And that everybody clapped

6points

rob 2 years ago

Yeah only girls get in trouble for kicking someone in the head...

7points

Terri Martin 2 years ago

The world isn't ready for these lies either 🥴

3points

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

People seem to think this is a really young girl. I don't know what they do these days but I had recess until 8th grade. That's 12/13 years old.

1point

Twit Hunch 2 years ago

I'm not sure how, but George Santos is mixed up in this somewhere.

1point

pat martin 2 years ago

A karate kick that young? They didn't learn the principle of karate, just to kick people. Shame on the senseí, shame on the parents for not understanding the ideals.... But hey, if you watch UFC and eat and listen to s**t, what's the prob, Bob?

1point

TheDemonicCat 2 years ago

If it were an older kid I would believe they would THINK that, but not say it aloud.

1point

Mark Mark 2 years ago

Ironic how the world's not ready for the daughter, yet we're already fed up of the mother.

0points

Terri Martin 2 years ago

Yeah , a child's first words were about "socio- political landscape"🥴🤣😔

0points

Androgyny Lunacy 2 years ago

She probably had a friend of a friend's kid in the classroom across the other side of the school tell her mom that she karate kicked a kid and the mom had to make up an excuse as to why so her child wouldn't look like a little sh.. just karate chopping over there. Lol

0points

#22

Ok Then Jasper

Final score:

40points

POST

James016 2 years ago

Hollaria Briden is actually a parody/satire account

13points

OMGhonestly 2 years ago

Thought so

1point

A Wild Bean 2 years ago (edited)

I can imagine the kid seeing this note and going "Hey Mom, what's a Elon Mask?"

10points

Binky Melnik 2 years ago

And also “Why doesn’t a vaccinated kid need presents?”

2points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

Mom: "There we go, sweety. Now you won't get any presents for Christmas" Kid: "What?"

4points

Twit Hunch 2 years ago

From a parody account I think. But if it had been a real fake rather than fake real fake, it would be obvious because they didn't point out how proud they are of the indentation. 🙄

3points

Lea S. 2 years ago

I am vaccinated so I don't need presents...WHAT?

2points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

His method for making the capital "E" and the lowercase "s" is oddly adult, compared to his other writings.

2points

Cthulhu Kitty 2 years ago

I love how all the fake kid writing is so clear and neat. All have been better than my handwriting

1point

Steve Robert 2 years ago

At least I agree with the sentiment

1point

Scorched Earth 1 year ago

So much woke nonsense here.

0points

Marilyn Cunningham 2 years ago

Spoiler alert: Jasper is 23 years old.

0points

#23

Grandma Made Up A Fake Homework Assignment To Own The Libs

Final score:

38points

POST

Jill Rhodry 2 years ago

Oh my, they made up a school worksheet and all🤣

126points

rosadobber arizona 2 years ago

Home-schooled

20points

Corvus 2 years ago

Sure, schools asking children what they would bring to communist meetings - sounds so plausible. (rolls eyes)

35points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

i think they think the year is 1953

9points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

ah yes, teach your children that the only proper response to a political belief that you don't agree with is MURDER BY FLAMETHROWER! what could go wrong?

27points

DC 2 years ago

... run out of fuel?

11points

KBT 2 years ago

Imagine putting in the effort to make this BS lmao, do these people have jobs???

19points

Shayne Randlett 2 years ago

A+ for effort. Imagine actually printing up an obviously fake quiz so you could fill it out posing as a child, photograph it, and then post it to show what a "great" parent you are. I genuinely feel bad that they need attention this badly...

16points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

Sick parents raise sick children

10points

Srinivasan S 2 years ago

I'm not sure whether they mixed up community with communist! Makes this post more funnier either way.

6points

R 2 years ago

I really hope that they aren’t home schooling

4points

Stephanie Trump 2 years ago

They probably are

0points

Arsène Thédié 2 years ago

Damn, I forgot to bring poems to my local communist meeting again, shucks !

3points

OMGhonestly 2 years ago

Someone went to a lot of effort with this one.

3points

#24

Of Course Emma Wrote That

Final score:

38points

POST

Hotdogking 2 years ago

Baby don’t hurt me

64points

Clown fish 2 years ago

No more

13points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

I'm an adult and can't print that perfect

5points

Clarf 2 years ago

I don't know may 6 year olds who can use "your" and "you're" correctly that many times in the same paragraph. Plenty of adults still get it wrong.

4points

OMGhonestly 2 years ago

Most obvious forgery yet.

2points

Mary Bricklin 2 years ago

I mean... that is the kind of silly answer a kid would come up with. But, yeah, that handwriting is too nice for a kid.

0points

Nancy Lynch Premium 2 years ago

She's six and her penmanship (pencil) is better than people in college.

0points

Blue Strawberry 2 years ago

BABY DON’T HURT ME

0points

YARETZI JIMENEZ CHAVARRIA 2 years ago

Awww

0points

Stephanie Trump 2 years ago

That’s really nice handwriting for a six year old. If

0points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

Sings "and I think I can fly" ad nauseum.

0points

#25

Painfully Fake

Final score:

38points

POST

Nea 2 years ago

Yea, painfully fake.

86points

Lyyyy 2 years ago (edited)

I just hope this is some kind of sarcasm.

6points

DBK 2 years ago

About 30-35 years ago, our daughters were on the picket line with their dad. A journalist, trying to trip them asked why they were there. Our eldest, 7-8 years old explained to the journalist what "equal pay" means.

5points

TheElementalGod️️ 2 years ago

The lies on the pus are so so fake... so so fake... so so fake... The lies on the pus are so so fake... all on the web

2points

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

Awww, a nursery school social activist.

13points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

And then all the four year olds clapped

6points

Shayne Randlett 2 years ago

And then all of this guy's friends and family gathered on his lawn to applaud and cheer for his masterful parenting

2points

Kaitlyn Lindsay 2 years ago

Also isn't the line the mommys on the bus say shhh shhh shh? Lol

1point

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

big nope

0points

Kelli Pike 2 years ago

🤮🤮🤮

0points

Mary Peace 2 years ago

The 'Proud dad' needs to learn that more than one Mummy would be "Mummies" and not "Mummy's".

0points

I just work here 2 years ago

Fake and dumb..

0points

Gandalf the Fan of Everything 2 years ago

Suuure he did 🙄

0points

#26

And All Of Gondor Clapped

Final score:

36points

POST

Yali-girl with weird name 2 years ago

These captions are amazing

39points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago (edited)

In surprise news, movie faithful to 100 year old book written by 200 year old man fails bechdel test. [Edit I am too lazy to look up actual ages, sorry, feel free to correct me.].

19points

Lyyyy 2 years ago

131 and 69. All the main characters are male, so there is only so much they can do, but they could’ve taken some modern freedoms with this one. 😄

13points

Lee Banks 2 years ago

Bechdel test! Don't believe this happened, for even a second, though.

10points

Ban-One 2 years ago

But where was Gondor when the Westfold fell?

8points

Jeramiah Ross AKA Module 2 years ago

Eowyn said it in a way to help the girl not give into her fears, later on i remember the mother finding the brother and sister, unless i made that up, where's a kid to write it for me!

4points

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

Now I have to watch it again, and remember to look for that.

0points

Dani Pret 2 years ago

Omg now I need to rewatch it all

3points

Ty Stratton-Quirk 2 years ago

Well, there's also the scene where Freda(the little girl) talks to her mother before she and her brother ride for Edoras.

1point

Toasted Applesauce 1 year ago

The little girl also speaks to her mother! And it is a male-centered story because of the times it was written in. But there are still great female characters! Éowyn! Galadriel! Arwen and Rosie didn't do anything but they were still models of virtue, which was very important to Tolkien and his Catholic faith. PLUS! plenty of Tolkien's other works (The Silmarillion, Unfinished Tales) pass the Bechdel test. I will defend Tolkien until my last breath. I would have gone with him to the end, into the very fires of Mordor.

0points

Wondering Alice 2 years ago

A story created by a man for his sons. The lack of strong female characters makes sense in this context. My dad use to make up epic adventures to tell us as kids (all girls) when we were camping and reading to us was tricky. Not on JRT level, and probably based on some half remembered stories. Characters were invariably female.

0points

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

He did have a daughter too.

1point

YARETZI JIMENEZ CHAVARRIA 2 years ago

I don’t get it

0points

#27

Mummy? Why Have I Got To Hold Up This Si-Just Shut Up And Keep Still! At Least Look At The Camera!!

Final score:

34points

POST

Hotdogking 2 years ago

The look on the girl’s face clearly says “I’ve got no idea what this sign says but I’m holding it up for the picture because mummy promised me a new doll if I did”

98points

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

Cookies. I don't think that large a bribe was necessary.

9points

rob 2 years ago (edited)

Ugh the "white privilege" cringe is really getting to me nowadays

27points

Valerie Lessard 2 years ago

It's becoming a ridiculous hate fest against white people in general, which is stupid because "white" is no more homogeneous than people of colour. White people from the Balkans were colonised, oppressed and genocided by the ottomans, who were Asian but it's absolutely not acceptable for them to say "Turkish privilege". It's just blind retaliation at this point, and it's perfectly acceptable. This photo is particularly disgusting. Teaching the child about race relations for one, when all she probably cares about is chocolate custard, using the child for self depreciating likes and using her to propagate an agenda that will be detrimental to her in her future

33points

Joshua David 2 years ago

Look at the floor in that house....

14points

Jcusack 2 years ago

From the rotting baseboards, She's not that "privileged" lol

14points

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

Privilege isn't that you don't have struggles, it's that your skin color isn't a factor causing it.

1point

Mary Peace 2 years ago

My friends had a floor like that in their entrance hall. They aren't rich, it was there when they moved in.

1point

Esme Weatherwax 2 years ago

To be fair it's possibly original Victoria tiling

1point

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

Sigh, if you want to virtue-signal, at least do it yourself, not with your kids. A proper way to teach kids about white privilege is to actually show them its effects and reality on the ground. Thanks, an African.

9points

Mary Peace 2 years ago

We don't know, but suppose she does show the child the effects, etc?

0points

Silenus 2 years ago

This is not only an example of the opposite of privilege, it is an example of child abuse.

6points

Kaitlyn Lindsay 2 years ago

The white hate trend is having real world consequences for white kids in mostly minority schools. My daughter gets so much racism spewed at her daily. Its just repeating history. Super frustrating because my mom marched for equal rights and treatment when she was in highschool .

4points

Anastasia Redmond 2 years ago

But it's highly profitable. The people who tell them to think this are raking in the donations.

0points

Rostit . 2 years ago

Parents are such cringe.

3points

astrin 2 years ago

i hate when parents use kids to preach on all sides. it's a kid, they don't know what you're talking about and don't need to especially if they're that young

2points

Niki A 2 years ago

Yes, the gross walls and floor say privileged to me.

2points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

What exactly is the message here supposed to be???

1point

#28

Okay

Final score:

34points

POST

Kat Pekin 2 years ago

Did you tell her you'd beat her up if she didn't say it?

44points

JoNo 2 years ago

Had sister complimented boyfriend in that 5 minutes? Younger sister should consider that double-standard.

12points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

hmm the ages are not given. IF we assume an american and the b/f is 16 like the driver, the sister is most likely around 12-14 yo, assuming a typical 2-4 y age gap. So yeah, I believe this is plausible.

6points

Cthulhu Kitty 2 years ago

Maybe the BF isn't a superficial jerk like the little sister

1point

Lisa Reuss 2 years ago

Forgot to say the younger sister is 4 & also said this in sign language at the same time. 😝

1point

Ellie Vanille 2 years ago

How about appearance is not that important and the boyfriend would rather compliment her on something she said or did ?

1point

Mam cymraeg 2 years ago

As mother of too many daughters ( 3 so tired ) this is most probably true ( my 13 yr old just told her 16 yr old sisters 18 year old boyfriend if he hurts her she will kill him - sister love too much or hate fiercely no in between but often at once lol )

0points

Unpopular opinions 2 years ago

Why didn’t the sister complement the BF on his looks?

0points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

Her younger sister is 25 and has a crush on her boyfriend

0points

Captain Awesome 2 years ago

And that, kiddies, is what we call a desperate attention whore.

-3points

#29

What A Gentleman

Final score:

34points

POST

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

This makes me cringe so hard, I can only see the gas splashing back into his little eyes and mouth. This is child endangerment.

148points

LK 2 years ago

In my country, it's illegal for anyone under 16 to put petrol or diesel in a car.

46points

cogadh 2 years ago

I think this is pretty much illegal in every civilized country.

7points

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

He probably isn't strong enough to press the lever hard enough.

0points

TomCat 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Henrik Schmidt 2 years ago

Why would you need a man to pump gas?

26points

Binky Melnik 2 years ago

So your shoes don’t end up smelling of gas. (I pay extra to have someone pump my gas, but half the time, it’s a female who pumps it. The point is those folks aren’t wearing their good clothes to do it.)

0points

Stary_cat 2 years ago

In a lot of countries this it’s illegal for people under the age of 16 to fill up gas

11points

René Sauer 2 years ago

I could see him wanting to do the stuff his parents usually do. But all that stuff he supposedly said there? Utter BS.

10points

Mickysixxx 2 years ago

I worry for his future, she's gonna be the worst when he starts dating

9points

Dani Pret 2 years ago

I'm sure he just said can I help

9points

Shayne Randlett 2 years ago

I guess if you post something as ridiculous as this, you're foolish enough to think someone might believe it

6points

Joshua David 2 years ago

Why people lying on their babies?

5points

rob 2 years ago

Love the follow my ig b******t at the end

5points

Lisa Reuss 2 years ago

Well, this is illegal. That child is way too young to even be pumping gas, let alone making that long-winded statement about things that are his mother’s baggage. All kinds of parenting errors going on here!

4points

#30

Finally Found One In The Wild!

Final score:

34points

POST

waddles 2 years ago

well don’t be jealous but when i was SEVEN i was able to trip on thin air and was a MODEL student in ballet (it was for kindergartners but age is just a number) so what can YOU offer

74points

A Wild Bean 2 years ago

Well, I was in the ADVANCED READING CLASS in first grade, and I even knew how to spell "tomorrow" *haughty sniff*

20points

3 Owls In A Coat 2 years ago

Oh yeah well I once won a 2nd grade spelling bee with the word “spaghetti” and also I had a bunch of fruit-scented erasers so watch out boys 😎

8points

Jordi Sharpe 2 years ago

Waddles is one of Bored Panda's finest. I salute you, good pig. 🫡

4points

Horten Ho-229 (she/her) 2 years ago

o7

1point

Con O Cuinn 2 years ago

Imagine being proud you're raising a complete snob

10points

Casey McAlister 2 years ago

I can believe that a 8 years old girl genuinely doesn't know why would she go out with a boy. At the age of 8 you probably still think that all boys have cooties.

9points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

We do.

3points

Joshua David 2 years ago

The fact that someone designed this thought, physically typed it and undoubtedly rewrote it a hundred times before publishing it scares me. A lot.

5points

Stary_cat 2 years ago

When I was seven I was top of the class at school and karate and my most impressive skill I could trip up stairs

4points

YARETZI JIMENEZ CHAVARRIA 2 years ago

Lol

0points

rob 2 years ago

🤮

3points

Lisa Reuss 2 years ago

Damn, some people have no shame. So clearly made up. These made up stories about people’s children only shine a spotlight on the parents’ insecurities.

2points

Dani Pret 2 years ago

Haaa. This is the kind of conversations I hear my 7yo having

1point

horroborros 2 years ago

8yo's got some sass!

0points

YARETZI JIMENEZ CHAVARRIA 2 years ago

I can speak 3 languages as well I’m black belt in tai kwon do and I kept my tamagotchi alive for 14 months what can you offer

0points

#31

Someone Ought To Tell This Kid('s Parent) That There Is One

Final score:

30points

POST

Amy S 2 years ago

I love when people care enough about international men's day to make up BS like this but not care enough to Google it and find out it's the 19th of November.

167points

les 2 years ago

well thats a silly idea, if we wont ask for directions when we're lost do you really think we'll google something useful? poor naiive child, lol

1point

Judes 2 years ago

Oh FFS. This BS gets trotted out every International Women's Day. There ***IS*** an International Men's Day. Stop whining.

27points

blackberrycobbler 2 years ago

Diagnosed autistic person here—PLEASE stop using Asperger’s (name of a guy who literally was a Nazi) and high/low-functioning (it’s not that simple.)!

22points

Wondering Alice 2 years ago

As a fellow neurodivergent who works with neurodivergent teens, I would really like a few more words to describe ASD though. I completely agree Asperger's is out, but I feel we need some new terms to help communicate with everyone else - in schools at least. An exchange I often have goes; hello (insert teacher name), child X in your class has ASD, please make sure he/she gets favourite chair in your seating plan and take care of who sits next to them. Teacher panics and asks why I'm not stopping - I assure them child will be fine so long as placed there. Fast forward a few weeks, I'm called because child is in melt down. I find kid in wrong seat. Teacher is mistified- saying they can't understand as the kid has shown no signs of any problems. Teacher then assumes child is doing this by choice to get own way. Usually ends by teacher insisting I stop babying kids. Month on, I can't get kid in to class. I'm not talking about one kid here - this happens all the time.

8points

Dani Pret 2 years ago

Why mention the first sentence, it had no relevance to the story

18points

Sleepy Frog 2 years ago

I read that Asparagus and I was so confused

12points

TheDemonicCat 2 years ago

Me too, I read it three times before finally figuring out

1point

Sad Quokka 2 years ago

As somebody with Aspergers, sadly we get shot down 🙁

11points

Shayne Randlett 2 years ago

There is - it's every day except March 8th.

9points

KBT 2 years ago

LBR, it's including March 8

8points

Demosthenes 2 years ago

Cause every day is international men’s day for the last 75,000 years?

7points

Syrah 2 years ago

There's is, it's 19th November

6points

Clown fish 2 years ago

Cough Nov 19 cough

5points

#32

Amen!

Final score:

30points

POST

Helena 2 years ago

Blech on so many levels

84points

René Sauer 2 years ago

Agreed!

8points

Suzy Creamcheese 2 years ago

Unfortunately, Bible thumpers really do brainwash their kids like this.

17points

Ches Yamada 2 years ago

I will never set foot in a Chik fil A and I LOVE fried chicken, I always try every place I can. Why do I need to go there, though, when there's plenty of chicken places that don't support hatred?

15points

Impasta (she/they) 2 years ago

Me and my friend made a pact not to go there because they were homophobic

6points

Dani M 2 years ago

I can believe this one is real because of how s**t it is

12points

xcooba 2 years ago (edited)

I just vomited a little bit.

8points

Renee Stephens 2 years ago

I can totally see this happening. Right after the grown up told them to do it.

7points

Dan Cary 2 years ago

AMEN!!

2points

A person with a problem 2 years ago

oh lord he got that 'future karen' haircut

2points

Jordi Sharpe 2 years ago

Every preteen boy in the 90s had that hair cut. I did. All my friends did. I wonder why it's made a comeback.

1point

Chilli 1 year ago

"Ok sweetie, just hold the nice policeman's hand while mummy takes the picture, and then you can get a milkshake."

1point

YARETZI JIMENEZ CHAVARRIA 2 years ago

Awwwwwww 🥰

1point

#33

And Then All Of Their Future Therapists Clapped

Final score:

28points

POST

Stardust she/her 2 years ago

I mean, I can see 13 year olds saying this. I also wanted to be able to not have kids at that age (still don’t want them)

56points

Sanchi 2 years ago

I’m 13 and maybe, maybe it’s possible it’s real

11points

Tash Wen 2 years ago

my 14 year old kid says the same

9points

Diana Pahule 2 years ago

I knew I didn't want them long before puberty.

3points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago (edited)

EDIT: I was misinformed about what vasectomies do - and do not do - to male ejaculations. My apologies, and thank you to those who explained it to me and allowed me to correct my improper knowledge without assuming I'm a piece of s**t.

9points

Phobrek 2 years ago

A vasectomy doesn't prevent someone from ejaculating semen.

5points

LK 2 years ago

You are a mis-informed person. After a vasectomy, a person can still ejaculate, and this is semen, but it doesn't contain sperm. DNA can be collected from semen. Sperm provide a far richer source of DNA, but it can still be taken from the semen. There is physical evidence.

3points

Con O Cuinn 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Karin Jansen 2 years ago

Wait.. so this woman who has a son, is applauding her son not having children? While she had them? Am I missing something here?

7points

General Anaesthesia 2 years ago

Aside from the age question of course, the decision to have children or not is very personal, or should be. So a mother respecting her child's decision is a good thing.

3points

Terri Martin 2 years ago

You're proud your child and his friends are already thinking about getting sterilized at 13? You know, there are other "birth control" options.

4points

Ches Yamada 2 years ago

I knew I didn't want kids when I was a kid. I was super young and I'd scream "I hate babies!" when parents tried to force their baby at me as a toddler (some kids like them I guess? Never understood why people did that, maybe it was simply sexism - "girls better get used to these things" lol)

4points

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

Poor Anakin.

2points

pat martin 2 years ago

I didn't want kids that age, as I'm an only child. I CHOSE to be a dad to my 1st child, but I did, knowing I'd be a better dad than the none he would have. Gave him my 1st name cuz that's all I could give him before he was born and gave him a better version of my middle name in my eyes, as not to be a junior per se, but he knows I didn't make him and he's 16 years old now and is proud to have me as his dad, and has 3 younger siblings from his mom and I. And they and I get complimented all the f'ing time how friggin awesome they all are. I am so proud of all of them, and I have raised them by myself for years. My kids will and HAVE, made amazing impacts on countless otherss, and none of them want kids either at this point. Don't make heavy choices until you can weigh the positive and negative. If you've ever had a kid run ahead of you to hold a door, help you with a bag of animal food into you car or cart, or be the 1st to say you can go ahead in line, you don't know. Love my kids.

1point

pat martin 2 years ago

#DoWhatYoureWorth it's worth it. Not easy, but it's right. We all deserve at least that.

0points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

I can see a 6-year-old asking for a vas heck to me thinking it's some kind of cool toy but at 13 boys are more likely to be interested in the fact that you can do more than drown ants and write your name in the snow with it

1point

Scorched Earth 1 year ago

So people think it's great children are not born from this day forward?

0points

Sam Lin 2 years ago

Did the boys know what vasectomy really is?🤦🏻‍♂️

0points

#34

Woke 4/Yr Old. White Man Bad

Final score:

28points

POST

rob 2 years ago

The f**k?

87points

TheNewJenBrady 2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

2points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

I'm all for animal rights and the humane treatment of animals, but saying that a bird is just as equally oppressed as a group of actual human beings that have been systematically murdered, neglected, and abused is just... wrong on so many levels.

28points

SaneMinotaur (she/her) 2 years ago

100% agree Lakota, that's beyond messed up. Also, not sure why anyone would equate turkeys with bad white men; I'm so baffled by the choice of lie, here. (And side note; why has she typed the 'quote' in baby talk? Excuse me whilst I cringe so hard that I disappear into myself.)

26points

xcooba 2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

KBT 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Lisa Reuss 2 years ago

😂😂😂 Do people really think we believe this nonsense???

10points

Kat Pekin 2 years ago

What a fun life your child must have.

9points

Twit Hunch 2 years ago

Oh, I recognize her! She was first in line at the "Buy a hot dog, get a free PhD" booth at the county fair. And then she asked if the hot dog was made from "tuwkey" or "beeph". And then everyone else in line cried harder.

7points

Dani Pret 2 years ago

Ffs.

6points

Moya Satterwhite 2 years ago

Yeah, right!

2points

pat martin 2 years ago

Ph.d, as in PHucking Dipsheet?

2points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

Um, no. Just NO.

2points

blackberrycobbler 2 years ago

I call satire, friend Pandas!

2points

#35

What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up? Sued For Malpractice

Final score:

27points

POST

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

Don't worry Mom, growing up may not be an issue at all for your poor kid.

152points

rob 2 years ago

Easy. There are many doctors who don't give shots, for example proctologist. Can immediately help your mom who has her head stuck up her own a*s.

32points

Lauren S 2 years ago

Took me a minute to realize this was anti-vax. It sounded adorable and honest like the kid hated getting shots because they hurt. Then I got that the poor kiddo hadn’t actually experienced a shot… sad.

29points

OMGhonestly 2 years ago

The penny finally dropped?

2points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

The kid next to him was asked, and he said "I am going to build little coffins"

15points

Ghostshaper 2 years ago

Student of the week? Homeschooled

7points

Deb M.F. 2 years ago

not gonna reach adulthood if she dies from a curable disease....anti-vaxers shouldn't have children and teach them to be morons just like they are

6points

Judes 2 years ago

She wants to get a PhD?

4points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

yes maybe in a non-medical field where facts aren't important, like discourse analysis.

1point

Cooking Panda 2 years ago

Or she wants to be a vet 🤷‍♀️

3points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

vets give shots. dogs have to have anti-rabies vax. guess all dogs are now autistic and tracked by Bill Gates... /s/ jk /smh

5points

David H 2 years ago

Hey, Geriatrics is an important part of medicine, never have to give kids shots, just old people.

1point

Jaya 2 years ago

5 year olds definitely repeat lots of the stuff their parents say, so this isn't unbelievable at all. It's just dumb that the mom is so proud of it, it doesn't say anything about the kid or the kid's intelligence or what the kid will grow up to believe, it's just a sign that the kid is still at the age where they parrot everything the parent says.

1point

#36

Woke Breastfeeding

Final score:

26points

POST

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

Your SIX-YEAR-OLD is still BREASTFEEDING?

126points

YARETZI JIMENEZ CHAVARRIA 2 years ago

Wtf that is not normal your child is NOT normal

15points

Klondike Penguin 2 years ago

Big deal. I moved on from breastfeeding at 2 and a half years… ago. (jk)

4points

Lizard Queen 2 years ago

😳

3points

waddles 2 years ago

“boobed” excuse me what

47points

Clown fish 2 years ago

Yes boobed that word not in the English language

10points

Liv 2 years ago

Look I don't want to be that person. Being a mom and raising a kid must be hard, and you gotta stick to your instincts and intuition. But from the moment the little guys have a full set of teeth, eat normal meals, and have full conversations I fear continuing "boobing" as always can start being damaging to their psychological growth.

41points

Stary_cat 2 years ago

Um 6 years old is a bit old to be breast feeding

29points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago (edited)

Maybe she's Lysa Arryn from Game of Thrones

8points

SaneMinotaur (she/her) 2 years ago

Before I scrolled down to see the age of this child and the fact they're in school uniform, I was thinking it was maybe a toddler or something. How wrong I was. Also, can we stop referring to breasts as 'boobies'? It's such a childish and cringey word for adults to say. Teach your kids the proper names for body parts, please... Kids need to be able to clearly communicate if there is any kind of issue going on with themselves.

21points

Binky Melnik 2 years ago

“Kids need to be able to clearly communicate if there is any kind of issue going on with themselves”: Exactly. In this case, he needs to be able to clearly tell a responsible adult that he’s six and a half and he’s being breastfed. Something’s seriously wrong here.

8points

Shayne Randlett 2 years ago

"He then boobed boobily until he couldn't boob anymore. He drifted off to sleep and dreamed about boobs..."

14points

That One Cat 2 years ago

I spat out my water lol thanks

0points

nobodyever 2 years ago

I’m wandering when until this boy is going to get picked on or disgusted by everyone

10points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

Now. It's already happening. Little kids don't know what to filter out/not say, so I guarantee this poor kid has already said to the kids at school that "Mommy lets me have milk from her boobies".

11points

Diana van Boxel 2 years ago

A Six year old still being breastfed…..🥴

8points

Your Neighborhood Alien 2 years ago

🤢

5points

Mickysixxx 2 years ago

Joshua is gonna have some issues

5points

#37

I'm Sure She Picked It Out Herself

Final score:

26points

POST

Kat Pekin 2 years ago (edited)

Poor little thing. Stupid parents dressing her to make sure people start a fight with them. People this dumb shouldn't be allowed to procreate.

103points

Demosthenes 2 years ago

Bruh, there is a bible sized list of reasons to not let people procreate, take a number.

1point

Klondike Penguin 2 years ago

I’d rather date my right hand than EVER dating a woman (probably a divorcee) like that.

-1point

Thomas Thevenin 2 years ago

Ok Karen

-3points

ChariotLee 2 years ago

That little girl has no idea what she's wearing. Let's stop trying to burden little kids with politics, ok?

27points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Lauren S 2 years ago

I bring my kid up to police so he can say hi. I want him to trust police and view them as safe. As with any group you’re going to have rotten apples but I think a huge majority are decent people trying to do their job.

19points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

That's nice. My experiences with police have all been very negative. I do not trust the police and tell my kids to avoid them if possible, stay away from trouble makers so the police don't need t to talk to you. But I'm a Latino in the US, and my son's mother is black, so he's screwed on both sides. My younger kids are from my second marriage, their mom is white, and her experience with police is a lot different from mine.

4points

Katy Cordeth 2 years ago

Why does OM's reply have so many downvotes? It was an accurate statement.

0points

KBT 2 years ago

Lol, are you a white family?

-1point

OMGhonestly 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Clown fish 2 years ago

Yes get rid of police! Oh hang on your house got broken into who you gonna call? NO ONE! S/

10points

A Wild Bean 2 years ago

GHOSTBUSTERS

10points

Dani Pret 2 years ago

Reason behind abolishing law enforcement? I hate it when parents use their kids to push their own opinions to the world

10points

magix (they/them) 2 years ago

why should we abolish the police? would you rather criminals run wild, r*ping and murdering? no? well, the police's job is to keep 'em locked up so they can't do that. sometimes they don't always do their job right, and some may do bad things, but that's the minority. most officers are here to do their best to bring justice.

8points

i believe in dendro supremacy 2 years ago

THANK YOUUUU. my dad has so many friends that are police and they are the sweetest people who take pride in their job and don't support any bs from other officers.

2points

Shayne Randlett 2 years ago

If someone snatches that little girl and the police save her, I wonder if mom will dress her differently in the future. Few things are more obnoxious to me than parents who advertise their political views on their children.

7points

Auntie Bear 2 years ago

Good for him. That little girl will remember positive interactions like this.

5points

Renee Stephens 2 years ago

As the man is peeling off the badge sticker for the child in his arms. You can be against excessive force by the police and still respect the job they do. And no. I am not a child. I am actually an adult saying this.

3points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

Using children to make a political point? Be very careful about the point you're making.

2points

#38

It’s 4chan So It’s Already A Given That This Didn’t Happen, But

Final score:

25points

POST

Hotdogking 2 years ago

I may be gullible af, but that actually sounds plausable ngl

54points

Lizard Queen 2 years ago

Yeah same but I'm an idiot when it comes to this stuff soo ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

8points

Dog_Frog 2 years ago

Honestly though, I REALLY hope he said that 😂

4points

PeppershakerPros 2 years ago

yeah lil girls think it's soooooo f*****g original to joke about edgy s**t so it kinda is

-2points

Clown fish 2 years ago (edited)

Dam that picture is scary

10points

Lyyyy 2 years ago

Yeah, I’m waiting for the Alien tongue to pop out of Smiths mouth

4points

Cal the dragon (she/her) 2 years ago

I mean I think I'm gonna say that, but FAAAAAAKE

3points

Ione Alva-wies 2 years ago

I would do this

2points

Chilli 1 year ago

I'd say it, and encourage my little cousin's to as well.

1point

i hate life 2 years ago

When does it ever say that god doesn’t want gay marriage?

1point

Cthulhu Kitty 2 years ago

I would take my kid to Disney world for an answer like that. Chef's kiss

1point

Chilli 1 year ago

Agreed

1point

Ches Yamada 2 years ago

But Fluttershy is married to Discord! /s but, kind of not really

1point

That One Cat 2 years ago

Ok I want this to happen so bad

0points

ImSayu 2 years ago

My friend prob wants to say thos so bad XD

0points

#39

Eight Year Old Kids Definitely Care About This Stuff

Final score:

18points

POST

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago (edited)

What?! I saw the Lightyear movie and I don't think they portrayed Buzz as gay...? His friend Hawthorne was gay, and it was amazingly tastefully and properly portrayed. And even if they DID "turn" Buzz gay, why is that "wrong"? Why does that "ruin everything"? ughhhh it's 2023, why are we STILL on about homoesexuals "ruining everything"?

110points

A Wild Bean 2 years ago

100% agree. Having the tiniest bit of representation isn't "ruining the entire movie" They literally never even say the word "gay," they just show two married women, and rather briefly iirc

32points

magix (they/them) 2 years ago

to be fair, i cause more problems than i solve. -a disaster gay (me)

13points

Lizard Queen 2 years ago

Who told everyone we were ruining everything? Was it fred?

4points

That emo Girl 2 years ago

I KNOW RIGHT SOME PPL ARE TWATBASKETS

2points

Frustrated Omegle 2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Joshua David 2 years ago

To me, this has zero to do with a movie. This is a parent using a child to further their agendas all while lying. Legit.

16points

PjandBolt 2 years ago

Buzz lightyear isn't gay..... at least it never says so in the movie, I mean they do have a gay character, who is a badass woman with the most heartwarming family but still why the conniption it's a cartoon man

10points

JE Cummings 2 years ago

Nothing like grooming a child for homophobia early.

6points

Casey McAlister 2 years ago

She probably wouldn't even notice it if you didn't purposefully point it out. She's just repeating whatever she hears adults around her are talking about.

6points

Lea S. 2 years ago

I've watched the new Buzz Lightyear movie a ridiculous amount of times (I have two young nephews)...I didn't notice Buzz was gay.

5points

Terri Martin 2 years ago (edited)

Your 8 year old only knows what you taught them which says a lot 😒

5points

Loki's_Lil_Butterknife 2 years ago

This is just a homophobic parent using their child as a scapegoat to further their hateful agenda.

4points

Kristal 2 years ago

I haven't seen the movie but, didn't Buzz like Jessie? Not that preference matters, continuity does.

2points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

XD The "Lightyear" movie is ostensibly about the "real" Buzz Lightyear person that the toy is based on in the Toy Story movies. So, the Toy Story plots/Buzz the Toy don't exist at all in the Lightyear movie. It's about the "human" Buzz (if that makes sense).

5points

ImSayu 2 years ago

Being gay isnt wrong, being closedminded is wrong. The Europeans were closed minded and made the coloured people slaves, they decided that even after slavery was proven wrong that they would be racist. Even know I am experiencing racism towards me and my family just because we are a different colour, just because we have different religion and culture. Even all of my friends are scared to come out as part of the LGBTQ+ community. One of my friends looks American and they are scared to come out as their real religion and culture. Stop making us need to fear you. Let us be who we really are.

0points

#40

I Think We Have A Winner!

Final score:

13points

POST

Clown fish 2 years ago

Well

6points

A person with a problem 2 years ago

I mean-

0points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

well... yes. They are. But not from a four-year-old.

0points

#41

Reminded Me Of This Subreddit

Final score:

13points

POST

Stardust she/her 2 years ago

6 different directions at once? What kind of nonsense is this?

56points

𝓚𝓮𝓲𝓽𝓱 2 years ago

North, Neast, East, Sord, West and South, obviously

24points

Donkey boi 2 years ago

We are spinning: 1) on our planet's axis, 2), around the sun, 3) the sun (and therefore solar system) has an elliptic galactic north pole rotation (more of a wobble if you ask me), 4) and travels around the galaxy, 5) which travels around our Supercluster, 6) which travels around the universe.

15points

Clown fish 2 years ago

Well we are all going to die because I don't think it's meant to do that! S/

6points

boone williams 2 years ago

Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving And revolving at 900 miles an hour. It's orbiting at 19 miles a second, so it's reckoned, The sun that is the source of all our power. Now the sun, and you and me, and all the stars that we can see, Are moving at a million miles a day, In the outer spiral arm, at 40, 000 miles an hour, Of a galaxy we call the Milky Way.

3points

DC 2 years ago

Well ... earth around itself, around the sun, and in that motion alone, the axis of motion itself is in motion in both cases. The rotary axis of the earth tumbles a bit ... because that, the north star is a title assigned to the star that is closest to the current axis and is faced by the northern hemisphere, and not one star holding the title forever and ever ... then, the solar system moves with and in respect to the galaxy, which itself rotates around it's main axis at least, ... but, that's besides. To be able to calculate stuff, usually motion, if possible, is divided into linear movement and single-axis rotation that are all superimposed on each other to have the complete motion. Often, only one or two of them are relevant. But, earth would not be flat even if it would not rotate, it might be even closer to an actual exact sphere than it is without any rotation, neighbouring object, ...

3points

Mary Peace 2 years ago

I can't think about this, I'm having a dizzy spell!

2points

les 2 years ago

i believe in medical circles that is called a fit

1point

Ilona Zálešáková 2 years ago

Srsly, this is what bothers you?

0points

A Wild Bean 2 years ago

Translation: While most kids actually learn about science, safety, and being kind and accepting, this... person (I couldn't think of a word that was accurate but also polite) is brainwashing their kids with conspiracy theories, and buying overpriced groceries

22points

LK 2 years ago

Yeah, 'We aren't the same.' Too right! We are most definitely not the same.

16points

Deb M.F. 2 years ago

no trigger here..just sad that mental morons like the poster are having children and subjecting them to this idiot ideology

13points

GloryToArstotzka 2 years ago

We are smart. You are not. We are not the same.

10points

OMGhonestly 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Terri Martin 2 years ago

Damn right we aren't the same. My children grew up to be respectful with common sense.

8points

Gøøse 2 years ago

I am as anti-flat earth as anybody, but I'd be curious to read that book. What baseless facts and "evidence" do they base their thoughts on?

7points

Mickysixxx 2 years ago

No we are not the same

5points

Stary_cat 2 years ago

1. This does trigger me 2. I don’t have kids 3. Let the kid have a life let them explore and be messy let them make their own discoveries, let kids be kids

5points

Lady Miss Pie Premium 2 years ago

What an obnoxious person

3points

#42

Sure He Did 🙄

Final score:

13points

POST

Annik Perrot 2 years ago

And started calculus in the womb.

10points

magix (they/them) 2 years ago

he was accepted to harvard, princeton, mit, AND yale at 3 1/2...months!

2points

Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago

Mind you if they had said he was beating grandmasters at chess by age 4 I might have believed it

2points

Dani Pret 2 years ago

Other alphabets? Sure

2points

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

Mine wrote his college thesis in the womb.

2points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

Lol, your kids waited until being conceived? How lazy.

0points

and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 2 years ago

Ok but there is an actual thing called hyperlexia, where people learn to read early, often teaching themselves, and read voraciously. 2, though. I’m skeptical.

1point

Steve Robert 2 years ago

Well I did start reading comic books before four and I don't remember learning to read. I just did. Course I couldn't pronounce the words I only heard in my head and everyone thought I was speaking Chinese when I would try and say them

1point

Lauren S 2 years ago

A 5 year old telling mom they love her make up is believable, especially if they’ve heard someone else compliment somebody the same way. But the “taught himself” mom is ridiculous. I don’t think 2 year olds have the fine motor skills to write. Maybe read, some kids just randomly absorb that from being read to, very rare. What’s he going to do by 6? Teach himself to drive?

1point

Clown fish 2 years ago

The one teaching themselves other alphabets and cursive

1point

Shayne Randlett 2 years ago

This whole thing is chaos...

0points

Corvus 2 years ago

And by 6th birthday, he had learned all trigonometrical functions?

0points

#43

Save Neil Young

Final score:

12points

POST

Henrik Schmidt 2 years ago

That's some pretty amazing handwriting for a five year old! I wonder if maybe his mom had a hand in this?

23points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

I was decently well-read at age 5, but I sure as heck didn't know the word "boycott", and I probably couldn't have spelled "apologizes" correctly XD

8points

Lauren S 2 years ago

I have a six year old. Spelling is also suspicious 🤨.

2points

Cyber Returns 2 years ago

Yep, her right hand

1point

Dani Pret 2 years ago

Fake

4points

Henrik Schmidt 2 years ago

Very.

1point

James016 2 years ago

This is a parody account. As above

3points

Rebekah Krause 2 years ago

It’s actually funny too! I feel like whoever submitted it was completely humorless

1point

Rebekah Krause 2 years ago

This is really freaking funny. Imagine a five year old so passionate about Neil Young. “Mommy, can we watch ‘Greendale’ again?”

2points

DubMaccaT 2 years ago

Then getting into an argument whether Buffalo Springfield was better than CSNY🤣

2points

Clasher9000 2 years ago

Spotify is getting ridiculous about removing content, directly and indirectly.

1point

General Anaesthesia 2 years ago (edited)

Just for history's sake: Rogan didn't force Neil Young from Spotify, Young pulled his music from Spotify because Spotify bought Rogan's rights. Small difference, especially for a lawyer (Esq.).

1point

Zach Heimann 2 years ago

Yes, im sure a five year old knows Neil f*****g Young

0points

Mark Mark 2 years ago (edited)

That signs stuck pretty high for a 5 year old...kind of like.....adult eye level?

0points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

So a five year old listens to Neil Young?

0points

Valerie Lessard 2 years ago

They're literally killing people? Literally?

0points

#44

From A Dinosaur Group About The New Jurassic World:

Final score:

12points

POST

Ches Yamada 2 years ago

Uhhh I might have said something similar at that age. Love dinosaurs, people? Not so much. I'd have been upset at the people and cheering for the dinos.

9points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

As kids, we were always cheering for the monsters

1point

Daphne Dear 2 years ago

I might watch it now lol

1point

#45

Son Schools Teacher

Final score:

12points

POST

Ana Ferreira 2 years ago

Depending on the age of the kid, I might believe this one.

7points

Lyyyy 2 years ago

Lol, if this was true they need to fire the teacher real quick.

3points

Bethany Heller 2 years ago

Unfortunately it probably wasn't on the teacher. Textbooks say that. It's considered highly Original and American. We were the FiRsT aNd DoN't SaY oThErWiSe

0points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

Don't pay any attention to the Greeks or Romans

1point

#46

Okay Honey Whatever You Say

Final score:

12points

POST

Lee Banks 2 years ago

The level of narcissism makes me feel gross.

17points

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

Welcome to my tween Ted talk.

3points

Valerie Lessard 2 years ago

No the onions are just as imaginary as that conversation

2points

ISeeWendiGo 2 years ago

Ah, yes. Cooking tea usually takes me forever, hours and hours. Then it's done and I have to start preparing for the next cooking of the tea.🙄

1point

rob 2 years ago

💩

-1point

#47

Desperately Hoping I Haven't Eaten The Onion

Final score:

12points

POST

Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago

He should have posted the rest of the conversation. I wanted to know this kid's thoughts on Nixon abandoning the gold standard.

12points

Steve Robert 2 years ago

So we don't have to increase your allowance then

0points

#48

Real Conversation With Daughter

Final score:

12points

POST

𝓚𝓮𝓲𝓽𝓱 2 years ago

I’m sick of seeing tweets where parents force/ pretend to force their own political views into children. Young kids should have no other job apart from living their life without the burden of idiots like this

13points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

This isn't even a real person. This was posted by a troll farm hired by Johnny Depp's PR firm. They had tons of these people posting everywhere for months. You couldn't go online for a while without seeing an attack on Amber Heard or something about how great Johnny Depp is. I have no clue what is it isn't true about their marriage, but I do know his PR firm is top notch.

1point

Mark Mark 2 years ago

Isn't 5! 25 though?

1point

Frostfirefox919 2 years ago

1 x 2 x 3 x4 x 5 is 120. 5!= 1 x 2 x 3 x4 x 5. 5 squared is 25, however!

0points

Tweaked 2 years ago

My kid said he never, ever wanted to go to softplay ever again under any circumstances because he fell in the foam pit, sooo... Kids can be pretty dramatic without having to lie about it.

1point

S Mi 2 years ago

This is not a comment on the Johnny Depp situation. But just a more general comment, in case anyone needs to hear it. Many people who use violence in their relationships are otherwise great to people. It would be possible to 'make sick kids happy' and still use abuse in one's relationships.

0points

Clown fish 2 years ago

Yeah ok.

0points

#49

One Of The Duggars

Final score:

12points

POST

Cintapxl 2 years ago

I'm not from the US so I need some help here. WTF is a spurgeon?

17points

BewilderedBanana 2 years ago

Not from the US either but i strongly suspect that it's the poor child's name. Hope i'm wrong, for the kid's sake

15points

LK 2 years ago

Spurgeon will be the child's name. Given the context, I suspect they were named after Charles Spurgeon. He was a famous preacher in England in the later half of the 19thC. But never mind that, wasps are not enemies, they are excellent pollinators. They are bees without the honey and the good public relations specialists.

8points

Sara Cros 2 years ago

I'm worried that's the kid's name...?

6points

KDS 2 years ago (edited)

It the kid’s name the Duggar’s all either name their kids with the same first letter or a weird name that sounds close to a sturgeon.

2points

A person with a problem 2 years ago

I think It's the poor kid's name💀

1point

xcooba 2 years ago (edited)

English Particular Baptist preacher, or the kids name

1point

Clown fish 2 years ago

I think this poor child has the name Spurgeon from 19 Kids and Counting

1point

Corvus 2 years ago (edited)

Spurgeon? Geez, this is like painting a target on his back and writing "Please, bully me!" underneath.

4points

Lakota Wolf 2 years ago

I got bullied and teased for being named "Crystal", not even a weird spelling thereof. I can't imagine the things poor Spurgeon is going to be called.

1point

Mark Mark 2 years ago

Spurgeon. Do you reckon he'll grow up to be a surgeon? Or go fishing for sturgeon?

1point

Upstaged75 2 years ago

This woman is one of the Duggar girls (19 Kids and Counting...) who was molested by her brother. She's obviously continuing the tradition of brainwashing her children. Also, his name is Spurgeon but they call him by some normal sounding nick name.

1point

Steve Robert 2 years ago

Flick the wasp! Burn the house down immediately!

0points

Tweaked 2 years ago

Spurgeon Seewald is gonna go far.

0points

#50

A Kid Singing About Their Food Seems Plausible But This One Takes It Over The Top (X-Post From R/Thathappened)

Final score:

12points

POST

René Sauer 2 years ago

She is happy with "Her" choice? *snort* right...

4points

Tweaked 2 years ago

My child tries to eat marbles.

3points

Natalia Shoemark 2 years ago

She only knows that life

2points

Coralinea 2 years ago

My niece is 4. She still thinks peas are green sweetcorn.

1point

A person with a problem 2 years ago

I know this post is fake, but PLEASE do NOT make your children vegan, even if you are. Especially your FOUR YEAR OLD. It can cause malnutrition and possibly kill them.

1point

Suzy Creamcheese 2 years ago

There are no four-year-old vegans.

1point

Lyyyy 2 years ago

My MIL tried to explain to my kids (6 and 4) that eating meat makes humans ill and even our teeth are not suitable for eating meat. I am almost vegetarian myself, but if she tries again, she won’t be welcome for a period of time. Mostly I wouldn’t have reacted that sharply, but she has been ortorexic for decades, and has presented all kinds of stupid ideas to my kids regarding food. Now my 4-year old has refrained from eating sweets like birthday cake for a month ”saying I don’t like treats” and ”Is this a treat? Because I don’t like them” and I’m quite sure she had a hand in this.

1point

#51

It Even Ends With And Then Everyone Clapped

Final score:

11points

POST

SaneMinotaur (she/her) 2 years ago

Ah yes, the classic 'everyone clapped' line... makes every story so much more believable....

19points

sproutdidydoodah 2 years ago

no it's true, i was the desk clapping

3points

Got hacked lol 2 years ago

made me cringe

1point

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

hmm it depends. If this was in first year history class at university, sure.

0points

Lee Banks 2 years ago

Bless the caption ;)

0points

#52

Ummmm..yeah

Final score:

11points

POST

Casey McAlister 2 years ago

So, when good white people read about colonization, slavery, genocide and massacres, they feel nice and comfortable? If you have to make up things your child said, at least think them through.

13points

Mulberry Juice 2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Auntie Bear 2 years ago

Or, you know, anyone with a shred a empathy.

3points

#53

A Future Proletarian Comrade

Final score:

11points

POST

Stephanie Did It 2 years ago

"Here Caighleygh, hold this and be still for the camera"

37points

Hotdogking 2 years ago

“But what is it?” “It doesn’t matter, just sit like that and I’ll let you stay up passed your bedtime!”

9points

Corvus 2 years ago

And then she brough thre book to one of those local communist meetings :D

3points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

must watch out for the flamethrower kid though.

1point

Katy Cordeth 2 years ago

Moo

1point

Steve Robert 2 years ago

Better talk to Devin's cow first

0points

#54

Op Has Never Talked To A 4-Year-Old

Final score:

11points

POST

waddles 2 years ago

i loosely remember saying love was chicken nuggets when i was asked this question at four

19points

xcooba 2 years ago

It makes sense.

4points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

Lol, my daughter said bacon and Mac and cheese

1point

A Wild Bean 2 years ago

Well you're not wrong

1point

CJ the Ghost 2 years ago

And you were correct

1point

Lav3nd3r_haz3 2 years ago

Not wrong

0points

Mulberry Juice 2 years ago

Chris’ answer doesn’t seem that made up

0points

#55

Found One In The Wild

Final score:

10points

POST

Kristal 2 years ago

Ah yes, I definitely remember being concerned about paying sales tax as an 11.5 year old

14points

DubMaccaT 2 years ago

Imagine what she’ll be like as an 11.6 yr old.

4points

Clasher9000 2 years ago

I did because sales tax meant I needed more allowance I had to use to buy a new toy.

1point

Pixie T 2 years ago

It will Be her top priority at aged 12

0points

Stardust she/her 2 years ago

“Maintains”?

4points

A Wild Bean 2 years ago

The maintains are beautiful this time of year

3points

Suzy Creamcheese 2 years ago

I can imagine her reciting this in a monotone voice while staring straight ahead without blinking.

2points

#56

And Then Everyone Applauded

Final score:

9points

POST

Niki A 2 years ago

First of all, that's not even close to the right answer. Second, that appears to be a world history question, which in most US schools is taught between 8th and 10th grade....

8points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

Not really, the Ottomans did attempt to invade Eastern Europe. But they were held back by a combination of an alliance of European states, and the Carpathian mountain range. The Mongol empire stopped their invasion of Europe after having made it past Germany because Europe was too poor, so why not try for India.

2points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago

FYI, They failed their invasion of India. There it was the Himalayan mountains, and then malaria. They also failed at invading Japan, there it was an ocean, and the Japanese navy was far superior on water to the Mongol cavalry. But they pretty much conquered everything between Germany and China otherwise.

0points

𝓚𝓮𝓲𝓽𝓱 2 years ago

breh

2points

censorshipsucks 2 years ago

fair enough.

0points

#57

Maybe If She Had Gone Vegan, Her Mother Would Still Be With Her

Final score:

9points

POST

Tweaked 2 years ago

Kids face says 'can we go get that ice cream you promised me now'

10points

Lav3nd3r_haz3 2 years ago

Kinda makes me feel guilty for being a person who LOVES meat..

0points

RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago (edited)

I took my kids to a protest before they knew what was going on. It's called indoctrination, and we ALL do it. We all want our kids to hold the same values as we hold, it's part of parenting. A few weeks ago I took my girls to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the homeless. It's not something they would have asked to do, but it's part of learning that there are other people in the world don't have what they have, and they should be thankful for what they were given, and gracious enough to give to those who haven't. If I felt strongly about veganism, perhaps I would have my kid holding this sign. But I like eating meat and cheese, so I don't.

0points

𝓚𝓮𝓲𝓽𝓱 2 years ago

?

0points

OMGhonestly 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Clown fish 2 years ago

No they ent

0points

#58

Boy Eloquently Explains Why Kellogg's Is His Favorite Cereal

Final score:

6points

POST

James016 2 years ago

That and it was designed to stop you wanting to touch yourselves, ya filthy animals.

11points

Katy Cordeth 2 years ago

"Mr. Kellogg's breakfast cereal is the only brand that prevents me sitting behind my locked bedroom door all day and night wa*king myself dry to Daddy's imported postcards of naughty French ladies attired only in their bloomers, and occasionally completely in the altogether. My goodness, the bushes on some of them!" Timmy, 11.

3points