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Article created by: Dominyka Proškėnaitė
An unfortunate part of dating that many women go through is the fact that many men, despite, ostensibly, being adults, need to learn a lot of things that seem like they should be self-evident. The reality is that, sometimes, a partner has to be molded and shaped.
Someone asked “Men, what is something your wife/girlfriend taught you that you use often?” and people shared their best examples. We also got in touch with the woman who shared the post to learn more. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to add your own thoughts, stories and examples in the comments below.
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#2
A few really magical ones come to mind:
1. Most people aren’t rude, they’re probably just shy
2. Don’t set yourself on fire to keep others warm. Putting your own needs at the bottom of the list is just masochism and is probably unhealthy.
3. One girlfriend explained to me (at age 19) that she had to learn to accept that during puberty her body was changing… it was as though guys just kinda got bigger, but a girl’s body changes in a profound and different way. I always thought about that whenever I was intimate with another woman’s body - their bodies can change from one week to the next
4. One girlfriend said something to me one night that was kinda funny… we were back at my place and had both had a big day. I was really tired. I explained I was exhausted and couldn’t really do much to make the night fun. She said that it was okay, it’s not as though I am a clown and have to keep her entertained.
#3
Check washing instructions before doing laundry. Except, this totally backfired on me because now I do all of the laundry.
#5
Sent this post to my husband of 15 years with the comment: "Kinda curious...".
His response: "Honestly, that I don't have to apologize for existing."
(Context: His parents were...not easy on him in his youth and always catered to and favored his sisters. He even mentioned he got grounded once for breathing too loud).
But wow this was the best and saddest compliment from my love ever.
#8
To not accept the barest level of quality in literally anything.
She encourages me to buy nicer clothing, a better computer, etc. not because nice things are important but because I should feel like I deserve nice things.
I think most men don't have any kind of voice that tells us we deserve good things in our lives.
#9
How to make a grilled cheese sandwich. My ex-wife asked me to make her one once. She watched in horror as I took two pieces of bread put cheese in the middle and then used the microwave.
#10
How to buy clothes. It sounds small, but I would always just get the first things that fit well enough; when shopping with her she taught me to only settle once I got something which actually fit me perfectly and which I was happy with. Shopping with her now takes an extra hour or so, but I get stuff which I love wearing as opposed to stuff which is good enough.
#12
A pile of clothes in the corner of the room is not acceptable and there was something called a hamper.
#13
To eat slowly and enjoy my meal. I came from a house where if you didn’t eat fast someone else would.
#14
She taught me to assume the best outcome in any situation, even bad ones. It helps remove or alleviate any possible anxiety, and brings a feeling of calm that keeps me focused and back to reality.
I observed her doing it for years, but it didn’t really stick with me until I was in my 30s. The rim could fly off the car while we’re driving, and she would already believe we’re going to crash into soft snow without any injuries or pain. It’s great.
#15
When dealing with a child, if you give them a little control back in decision making it makes controlling them easier when they don’t want to do things. This has helped me as a parent, but even more so as a doctor for kids. My wife is a genius.
#17
That I am lovable, valued and valuable even when I am not providing a service.
She taught me this by the negative space created when she left, and I realized I had friends and family and hobbies that fulfilled me, and that I was happier in the company of books and music than alone with her. .
#18
How to budget my money, before my partner I was awful with money really did burn a whole in my pocket but she's really taught me the importance of having money in the bank.
#19
How to braid hair. All boy household except for mom, and she had the curliest hair ever and kept it short. Mine is curly too, but I also cut it short. Long, straight hair, which she has, and basically everything that went along with it, was pretty much a total mystery to me before. Now I’m an expert 😎🤣.
#22
She taught me how to cook better. I could always cook for myself before, but she really taught me a greater variety of ingredients to cook with. Just really opened up my world.
#23
How to cook/season food. She was horrified when I told her I don't like chicken noodles soup because we always have it straight out if the can (usually warmed up). Then she made me homemade soup also using the can, and it's like being sick was worth it just to taste that soup.
#24
My first gf taught me how to go down on a woman and I use that technique to this day. Shout out.
#25
To stop and think logically before flying off the handle.
I’m still working on it, but she’s likely saved me from numerous uncomfortable moments due to my temper.
She’s incredible.
#26
Give them time.
It's never enough, but give the two of you time, as much as possible, whenever possible.
#28
The value of holding my tongue ... even if it's important enough to say, it doesn't need to be said in the heat of the moment.
#31
She taught me how to crack multiple eggs. You get one in each hand and tap them together till one of the shells cracks. The one that is still solid has 'won' the battle and gets to fight a new egg. Makes baking that much better.
#33
That you can use your feet like heat sink radiators by sleeping with them outside the sheets. It helps a lot to stabilize my body temperature on those in-between nights when I'm not sure whether I'll be too hot or too cold.
#35
To check before buying something…and to save some money! It has reduced the spending and got us saving a lot of money in no time!
#37
She taught me to be more decisive.
- She definitely needs leadership because she’s very trait neurotic. I on the other hand have always been very carefree and unbothered so I rarely had strong opinions about stuff in general.
- I am very analytical and problem solving comes easy to me. So being able to express an opinion and follow through actually helped me a lot at work.
#38
I taught my boyfriend to put a dryer sheet at the bottom of the trash can under the bag. He was amazed that the garbage didn't smell anymore and now does it religiously in every trash can at his place.
#41
To not try to solve every problem they tell me about. It took a while but I eventually learned that women like to tell you about their problems for no reason and if you try to solve them, they get mad. They don’t want you to fix everything (or anything really).
#43
To apply lotion everyday and my skin would feel better.
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