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If every song is inherently about love, then finding a joke dedicated to this chemical brain reaction is far rarer. But we did it! We have scoured the Internet, checked every thread and every post, and found enough funny material to dedicate a complete list to adorable love jokes. And you know what, it’s right on time for Valentine’s day, so you might just have the perfect source for greeting card inspiration in front of your very own eyes.
So, the things you are about to find on this list are: the cutest jokes on bees meeting their honey, the silliest pick-up lines, the most adorable puns on doctors having crushes, and, of course, some healthy satire on the institution of marriage. So really, a love joke for any occasion, any Valentine’s Day plans, and even for those who aren’t paired up at this instant. Alas, with the help of these silly jokes, who knows, you might just attract someone’s attention!
And while we know that some of you cringe the very hardest upon seeing anything sweet or cute, we can bet that these love jokes will make even the iciest heart thaw at least a tiny bit. If you are still determined to prove us wrong, though, try and read this article without uttering any ‘awwws’ and ‘oooohs’ even in the solitude of your cranium. If you honestly succeed, our bows are deserved, but if not - a ‘we told you so’ might be issued. Well, anyway, let’s just go to the silly jokes and check them out for ourselves, shall we? Of course, don’t forget to vote for the love jokes that made you squeal with joy and share this article with your loved ones (even if it’s a cat).
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#1
My friends laughed at me when I said I had a hot date and said that she was imaginary.
The joke is on them, though. They’re imaginary, too.
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#2
If I ever have a heart transplant, I’d want my ex’s. It’s never been used.
#3
I’m in a long distance relationship. My girlfriend is in the future.
#4
A relationship without trust is like a phone without service. And what do you do with a phone without service? You play games.
#5
When one satellite dish falls in love with another, what’s the best part of the wedding?
The reception.
#6
Who always has a date on Valentine’s Day? The calendar!
#7
My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."
#8
The T-Rex told his girlfriend, “I love you this much” as he stretched out his arms as far as he could. His girlfriend said, “That’s not very much.”
#9
What do you call two ants sharing a slice of pizza in Italy?
Romance.
Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago (edited)
Romance in many latin languages have a different meaning than english..it signifyes some glamourous Love between man n woman,like the story of Romeo n Juliet....not Just a vulgar TV soup Opera
#11
My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
#13
Why shouldn't you fall in love with a pastry chef?
He'll dessert you.
#15
What did the volcano say to express his love to his girlfriend? He said, “I lava you so much!”
Bored koala 3 years ago
It is honestly the best, me and family watch it all the time and we say it to each other sometimes
Load More Replies... Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago
What did the saucer plate say tô his girlfriend cup-of-tea sitting on his lap ??? BABY,U HAVE SUCH A HOT BUN....
#16
Don't break anybody's heart; they only have one. Break their bones; they have 206.
#18
Had a nice long chat with my husband today after our WI-FI went down. He seems like a nice guy.
#20
What did the octopus say to its octopus crush? “I wanna hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand.”
#21
My wife thinks I don’t respect her privacy enough. At least, that’s what it says in her diary.
#22
Do you like vegetables because I love you from my head tomatoes.
#25
Spouse #1: "I love you." Spouse #2: "Is that you or the wine talking?" Spouse #1: "It's me. Talking to the wine."
Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago
N I Love wine more than humans lovers...they satisfy my inner ego above all
#26
They say that when you meet the right person, you know immediately. So how come when you meet the wrong person it takes a year and a half?!
#27
Being in a relationship is just yelling "WHAT?" from different rooms for thirty years and then you die.
#28
They keep saying the right person will come along. I think mine got lost.
Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago
Never mind some losses in life...sometimes is better alone than with the wrong companions
#29
My girlfriend just told me that she didn’t care what she got for Christmas, as long as it had diamonds in it. Looks like somebody’s getting a pack of cards.
#30
Why is Spider-Man the perfect boyfriend? Because he’ll always stick beside you.
#31
Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me!
#32
What happens when your boyfriend pokes you in the eye? You stop seeing him for a while.
Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago
'Cause he been arrested for assault, a very common crime nowdays..hoje he stays in jail for a loooong time
#33
We're not socks. But I think we'd make a great pair.
Vic 3 years ago
A lot of people are like socks, they loose each other in the washing machine of life..
Load More Replies... #34
What did the light bulb say to the switch? “You turn me on.”
#35
What do you get when you kiss a dragon?
Burnt lips.
Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago
When u Kiss a frog it becomes an enchanting bonde young prince...but if the animal is a Dragon it will digest you entirely
#37
The secret to a successful long-term relationship is the ability to laugh at the same joke 3,682,000 times.
Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago
Hahhhhhhhhhh...lol..but I will stop here, I do not wish that level of sucesso,defitly
#38
What did one little flame say to the other? “We’re a perfect match.”
#40
I always wanted to marry an Archeologist. The older I would get, the more interested she would become!
#43
Knock, knock. Who's there? Owl. Owl, who? Owl always love you!
#46
How do you make a crush notice you if they don't believe in love at first sight? You pass by them again.
#49
I like to show my girlfriend who's the boss in our house. I do this by holding a mirror up to her face.
#50
What happens when you date a girl whose ex-boyfriend was a clown? You get some big shoes to fill.
#51
Even if there wasn't gravity on earth, I'd still fall for you.
#56
Why is it difficult to impress the police? Because they don’t like anyone who steals hearts.
Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago
Só what? Robbers are yet worse ,one of these rascalls ran away after getting my necklace Gold chain with a pure 24 karats small heart attached to that
#57
Confucius says "Love one another. If it doesn’t work, just interchange the last two words."
#59
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” She replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”
#60
Which song do sunflowers listen to when their girlfriend goes to work? “Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone.”
#64
I'm single by choice. Unfortunately, it's not my choice.
#66
LOVE stands for Loss Of Valuable Energy.
#67
A husband was throwing knives at his wife’s photo and missing the target. All of a sudden, she called to ask what he was doing. His reply was, “I am missing you.”
#68
My partner asked to play doctor…
So I kept him waiting outside the bedroom for three hours!
#70
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
#75
My girlfriend is always stealing my t-shirts and sweaters... But if I take one of her dresses, suddenly "we need to talk".
#77
Do you know what happened when one girl fell in love with a mechanic? Their relationship had a breakdown.
#79
What did the mobile phone say to the Wi-Fi router? “I think I feel a special connection between us.”
#80
Wife: “Do you want dinner?” Husband: “I don’t know. What are my choices?” Wife: “Yes or no.”
#83
The difference between true love and dinosaurs: We're sure that dinosaurs once existed on this earth.
#85
How do you tell your boyfriend that your relationship isn’t working out? You stop going to the gym with him.
#89
My husband is of the opinion that I am absolutely crazy. But if he is the one who decided to get married to me, then that makes him even crazier than I am.
#92
You are like dandruff because I just cannot get you out of my head no matter how hard I try.
#94
What did the patient with the broken leg say to their doctor? Hey doc, I have a crutch on you.
#100
Why do painters always fall for their models? Because they love them with all of their art.
#102
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and me together.
#103
Do you know why the Queen of Hearts married the King of Hearts? Because they were utterly suited for each other.
#104
Why did the baseball player have trouble dating?
He always had a hard time getting to first base.
#105
What did the astronaut’s girlfriend say to him when he proposed in outer-space? “I can’t breathe!”
#106
What was the stamp’s way of confessing his love for the envelope? He said, “I’m stuck on you!”
#107
My girlfriend left me because she couldn’t handle my OCD. I told her to close the door five times on her way out.
#116
You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That's your common sense leaving your body.
#117
My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that...
#118
My girlfriend said, "You act like a detective too much. I want to split up." "Good idea," I replied. "We can cover more ground that way."
#123
My wife keeps telling me that I’m the cheapest person she has ever met in her life. I’m not buying it.
#126
I think my girlfriend has a blind fetish. Last night she said we should stop seeing each other.
#134
Why did she fall for the high-fat, low-carb diet? Because it was the keto her heart the whole time.
#138
Women are like telephones. They love to be held. They love to be talked to. But, if you press the wrong button, you’re disconnected.
#139
Love is a very complex matter of chemistry. And that is why my partner treats me like toxic waste!
#141
What's the difference between love and marriage? Love is one long, sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock.
Nilce nice Bizancio 3 years ago
Love in the beggining is Just like a delicious lollypop but when marriages arrives it ends up as a stick
#150
My parents won't say which of their six kids they love the best, but they have told me I finished just out of the top five.
#153
What’s the best thing about dating an architect? The foundation of the relationship is strong!
#155
How do atoms know that they are falling in love? They feel a strong force between each other.
#156
What would the earth say to the sun if they started dating? “My entire world revolves around you.”
#160
Love is when I walk to the other side of the classroom to sharpen my pen just so I can see her. And then I realize that I am holding a pen.
#161
I want to spend the rest of my life trying to get out of debt with you.
#162
Why did the bartender get back with her boyfriend? Because he kept asking for one more shot.
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