“Kamikaze By Words”: 35 Epic Comebacks From People Who Destroyed Themselves In The Process (New Pics)

Self-deprecating humor has brought success to many comedians. Bored Panda spoke to comic Ariane Sherine in a previous piece. For her, such light put-downs of oneself are acceptable if you draw the line between comedy and reality.

It’s a strategy that many successful comedians today utilize. Some of these famous names include Louis C.K., Bill Burr, John Mulaney, Jim Norton, Marc Maron, and Mark Normand, to name a few.

Mark Normand has been doing stand-up since 2006. He’s achieved relative success with appearances on Conan, The Late Show With Stephen Colbert, and the Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon. Here’s one of his stand-up bits where he talked about how “evil” his brain is. 

“My brain is evil. It attacks me. It’s like a bully. I’ll be at a party, hanging out, and everybody’s having a good time, talking. My brain’s like, ‘Hey, you weirdo, you’re being too quiet. Everybody’s wondering why you’re such a quiet weirdo. Come on. Get in there, say something, you lunatic. 

“‘Come on, you freak. Jump in, you psycho. Come on, get in there.’ Then you finally say something, and your brain goes, ‘Whoo… that’s what you picked?’”

Chicago-based comedian John Mulaney has a deep, impressive résumé, which includes two Primetime Emmy Awards and a successful Netflix special. However, he rose to prominence as a Saturday Night Live cast member. Here’s his self-deprecating stand-up bit about looking older. 

“Have you ever seen America’s Most Wanted when they age a photo of someone? Just take my kindergarten photo, yellow the teeth, put bags under the eyes, and be like, ‘This is what he would look like now.’”

Experts consider self-deprecating humor as a healthy form of expression. A 2018 study found an association between having the ability to laugh at oneself and higher anger control. These people are likewise believed to be more capable of reducing outbursts toward others. 

From a layman’s point of view, self-deprecation isn’t just a sign of humility. Many see it as a form of high emotional intelligence, and the ability to handle an awkward situation by taking the heat is a personality trait that usually makes a person likable.

But the flip side shows how self-deprecating humor could be more detrimental than beneficial. York University student Danielle Russell wrote an essay entitled “Self-deprecatory Humour and the Female Comic: Self-destruction or Comedic Construction?” where she pointed out how it almost panders to the audience. 

“Self-deprecation can be construed as a form of self-censorship. Satire is directed towards the self rather than confronting external targets. In a sense, it is a form of accommodation – accommodating the perceptions of others.”

Experts draw the line between modesty and self-deprecation in terms of mental health. Confidence coach Jo Emerson spoke to Metro about the differences and how the latter affects both people in conversation. 

“True modesty leaves the receiver feeling peaceful, whereas self-deprecation tends to leave the receiver feeling burdened to prop up the self-deprecator.”

For some people, self-deprecation comes naturally. Often, they fail to notice when they are doing it. For Harley Therapy founder and clinical director Dr. Sheri Jacobson, it could be a sign of a deeper emotional issue. 

“If you get told that you often self-deprecate, and that seems surprising to you, then it is more likely a case of low self-esteem,” she said, pointing out that having a deflated concept of oneself can lead to a deep, “serious” depression.

But does this mean that you should never use self-deprecating humor? Not necessarily. Like in all things, context matters. A good example pointed out by Harvard Business Review was a statement from John F. Kennedy in 1958, two years before he was elected president. 

At the time, JFK took flak from critics who claimed that his wealthy father, Joseph P. Kennedy, would buy votes and swing the election in their favor. The younger Kennedy had this to say in response: 

“I just received the following wire from my generous daddy: ‘Dear Jack, don’t buy a single vote more than is necessary. I’ll be damned if I’m going to pay for a landslide.’”

Ultimately, it’s all about finding balance. While self-deprecation for the sake of humility and breaking the ice isn’t harmful, experts also remind us about knowing when it becomes too much negative self-talk. 

Journaling is one recommended practice for self-awareness. As New York-based therapist Jill E. Daino points out, “While not everyone likes to use it, it can be very helpful in reframing negative thought patterns.”