Everyone who has seen the Oscar-winning classic, Forrest Gump, will remember his famous adage: “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get.” While this is true with pretty much everything in life, this couldn't be more applicable to messaging.
From someone 'sliding' into your DMs with a random cookie recipe to the phone's auto-correct hijacking your ultimate break-up text, not a day passes without someone getting weirded out by the least-expected DM. And to remind you what a wild, wild West this poetic form of communication can be, the Weird Dms Instagram page is here to do exactly that.
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Fastest way to get rid of creep asking if you've been arrested 1 say yes 2 make what ever you were arrested for a bit scary so creep goes away
Load More Replies...I was approached in a bar by a stranger I wasn't interested in. His opening line: I'm checking you out (gag!). My response: I'd start with my CORI before getting your hopes up.
Ever since Ray Tomlinson made email one of the hottest things in the '70s and Nokia, the once largest phone manufacturer in the world, did the same with text messaging after presenting the world's first mobile phone with a texting function - the way humans communicated evolved in mysterious yet sophisticated ways.
Although, we're pretty sure Tomlinson and others responsible for putting homing pigeons out of business would be pretty confused to see how much time, energy, and thought we put into sliding into someone's DMs.
Perhaps the greatest case in point on this is Instagram, the beloved social media app which has more than 2.3 billion active users today. Many might not remember this but when it was launched in 2010, all you could do was share photos, like and comment on them. That's it.
Everything changed, however, when in 2013 Facebook, the app's parent company, added a direct message feature. The only caveat: you couldn't start a conversation with a "Send bobs" or "Hi dear", or an all-explaining GIF. Something that only changed a few years down the line, making Instagram the lifeline for generations to come.
What I told my crush. “Imma say bye to you until I die probably, so I might not see you until Heaven”
Load More Replies...Just not… too much, although I see this one, I’m talking about when you’re wearing a hideous dress and they say it looks like someone smeared poo all over a nightgown
Load More Replies...me to Monoboi (he's a racist, narcissistic, misogynist, homophobe and also fetishies lesbains)
Dam. props for the commitment, but if you're late, you'll be failed automatically. Sorry.
Probably set a timer, and forgot about it until they got a notification.
Load More Replies...While it's hard to say exactly how many DMs are sent each day from apps like Instagram, the newest data gives us a ballpark number of 18.7 billion texts worldwide every day - and that's not including app-to-app messages from WhatsApp, Twitter and other social media giants. Pretty difficult to wrap our heads around that one, huh?
On the other hand, it's not so surprising, given that teens send a minimum of 50 text messages a day, according to one survey in 2010. Which means that by today's standards, this number could be as high as the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building in the world.
Be Careful 05-1, SCP-049 among other SCP's are roaming these pages
Load More Replies...I'm down! Yet...I think the majority of mankind is too reliant on being controlled... v_v
Load More Replies...That's the emergency confetti! You should always carry a pocketful with you
Load More Replies...Relationships are like confetti. You'll have debris to clean up both ways.
What if he takes it bad? I know, I'll add confetti to soften the blow.
Still funnier than half of the other posts, so at least I don't mind at all.
Load More Replies...Afraid of borders? Different time zones? Languages? Climate? Food?
well you see, my last customer from overseas was the Karen boss and she kept finding my number and demanding to speak to my manager, i'm still recovering from the shock
However, no king can rule forever. What Facebook is for the 'MTV generation', Instagram became for Gen Z'ers. According to Casey Lewis, a youth-culture consultant who authors the youth-culture newsletter After School, "They don’t want to be on it, but they feel it’s weird if they’re not.”
In a recent survey conducted by Piper Sandler, which involved 14,500 teenagers from 47 states in the US, it was revealed that barely 20% of them selected Instagram as their preferred social media platform. Considering that 75% of them admit to using Instagram as their go-to app for DMs, it's quite telling.
I love it but so few would get it, I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain...
The crayons? I love it! Will def be stealing that and using in the future =)
Load More Replies...I appreciate the play on words, but some words shouldn't be played with.
I decided years ago my aging ears couldn't take the noise of concerts anymore, but I'd pay whatever they want to go to this one
Texting while driving is major cringe!
Load More Replies...Very cute. Once I was stuck in traffic and texted my friend to see if he was in his his girlfriend’s condo that we could see from the expressway. He was and he came out and waved. It was exciting for everyone.
Of course, one of the most peculiar elements of DMing is nonetheless receiving a text without the sender's name attached. Something that the last season of Netflix's hit series You played on, not to mention the all-time classics such as You've Got Mail.
This predicament presents a dilemma: should one boldly inquire about the sender's identity, risking the embarrassment of admitting their failure to save the contact? Or should one play along, diving head-first into the thrilling mystery (which, lest we forget, may well just be your long-lost cousin)?
In either case, both scenarios present a million possibilities which are difficult to replicate outside the screens of our phones.
For my mother it's water. I have sent these texts too except without telling why I need to talk.
Load More Replies...The thought of doing pushups is the cause of my panic, not the solution.
Honestly idk what to do when I'm texting my friends when they're having a panic attack. They dk what they need either...
maybe they need someone to talk to. call them and listen to them until they calm down
Load More Replies...Accually that is a good advice. You should not speak with affected person about the attack, the attack will take much longer. The best solution is to let it happen, without doing anything special, continuing the activity you did when in started.
That shyt ain't funny. I had an attack while walking through a grocery store after lunch with family. I thought I was about to die. Every went grey/black and my mother managed to guide me to a bench at the front of the store. Paramedics came etc. The weird thing was though that I was fixated on women's asses that walked by me. I wasn't thinking about sex, but it kept me going. Shrug.
My dad when someone dies a gruesome, pitiful death at the hands of a bad guy (worth no more than c**p ugh some violent bad guys make me sick): “They’re just uh, sleeping. Yeah.” Me: “Yeah. They thought the cold concrete floor was a nice place to take a nap and uh, fell down a little to hard and cracked their skull open. They’re still alive though, totally. Just in a coma. But really, yeah, they’re sleeping.”
Load More Replies...well, then, hope you rest in peace tonight.
Load More Replies...Better than when an ex I had would say "curse you" instead of "bless you" when people sneeze. Because he's atheist. Like wtf mf-er my dad is a lifelong atheist and even he knows cursing is pretty much universally agreed upon to be bad and blessing someone is good and does not have to be religion based!
When executed skillfully, sliding into someone's DMs becomes a gateway to forging connections, an expedited route to intimacy in the realms of dating, friendship, or flirtation. A well-crafted and timed private message, then, can also effortlessly set the stage for meaningful interaction which can morph into a job offer - just like it happened for Natalie Zfat, a well-known social media expert.
"I was by sending a blind message on LinkedIn to the managing editor of Rolling Stones magazine. It was between 2006 and 2000, so it was very uncommon to get a message from someone you didn't know on LinkedIn at the time," she told Bored Panda in a Zoom call. A few weeks later, Zfat was on a plane boarding for New York City, where she landed an internship position at the magazine. "I do very much believe in the power of a DM because it's literally what helped launch my career."
Was “cringe” in the title of this? Now it’s just. “wildest screenshots”
Load More Replies...to be fair, i was having a mental breakdown and i put on the mothman version of ymca and was crying and dancing to it
NGL... If she was dancing like Shakira in "Torture," I'd be pretty terrrified. Especially since I just bought nice furniture. Take a shower first, Shakira.
When someone offers to dance like Shakira for you, the answer is always YES!
The pfp is what gets me, you can see the search bar in it, that's amazing
As good as the Michael Jackson one. I’m not dead need money for new song. Hee hee
Hee hee. That reminds me. I wanna be cringe but… I also wanna blend in a little better, yknow? Would it be weird if I had P.C. (Hee/hee) ??
Load More Replies...Of course, when handled poorly, private text trespasses upon personal boundaries, violating the sacred space of the DM inbox. Which can eventually backfire, just as words do in real-life. "They say, 'Dance like no one's watching, email and text like it could be read in a deposition.' The same is true for DMs - you don't want to send anything that would be considered inappropriate or stalker-y," Zfat explained.
Bad English and the whole ‘incel’ vibe is very uninviting. Any second and he’ll burst into tirade about how ‘woman’s’ owe him attention and sex…
There is a very pleasant Norbert in the Harry Potter books. He's got a bad case of scaly skin, sad need of moisture.
Wouldn’t be surprised if I did… but that’s not the reason people tend to stay away from me. My badness level is unusually high for someone of my size.
Load More Replies...Rabies is bad enough on its own - having rabies n s**t but be awful!
Wait so you were the one who sent this? And you screenshot it and posted it?
There's probably sites where you can make these btw
Load More Replies...Then there's an unwritten rule in the realm of social media: thou shall stick to one platform unless explicitly invited. Nobody enjoys the experience of being subjected to relentless "social media stalking" across various accounts, right? As Zfat argued, "For someone you don't personally know you're reaching out to for the first time, you don't wanna ask a question on TikTok and then LinkedIn, and then Instagram - like for any other reason in life." In other words: that might come off creepy and weird, and we don't want that, do we?
"If you want someone to respond to you, you need to keep it contained and easy to organize, and easy to keep track of," she suggested, "don't have like three conversations about the same topic in different places, especially with someone you don't know." And that includes 'Tindstagramming,' the creepy dating act where someone who was just rejected on a dating app tries to slide into that same person's DMs for a second chance. Yuck.
I wanna be under the rest! And I wanna *stay* under the rest, especially in about 6h when my alarm goes off and I have to get up for work!
Load More Replies...See, now I'm sorry I'm not a UK citizen. I really need to be under some rest.
maybe they sell them for cheaper? idk i use spotify (with ads)
Load More Replies...I haven’t gotten one like this yet. I can’t wait. I need to start a collection of these idiot scam texts.
I stopped breathing. From, yknow, initially scrolling down
Load More Replies...Ooh, that's a good username... I've been thinking about how many other usernames are better then mine lately, but now people know me by this so instead of changing it, I just think "man, I should have thought of that one first." Then the ones with the best names or funniest comments I start to remember, so it's like I know you all, so I try to guess gender and county of origin!
I do the same when I see a good username. I think yours is good though!
Load More Replies...As with most things in life, it's always worth remembering what's the end goal of your texting crusade. "I will be the first person to tell you this but if you are trying to forge an intimate connection with someone - you need to get off of social media as soon as possible," Zfat said. It's unwise to engage in a prolonged exchange regarding serious topics, be it a job interview or a romantic relationship.
And while DMs serve as a promising starting point, she makes a good point that they are not a suitable medium for sustained or conclusive conversations. A face-to-face conversation is. "DMs are a good place to start, but it's not a good place to continue and certainly not to end a conversation. The goal is to take it offline."
Got nothing better to do. Might as well ruin some innocent person's life!
I once had a guy who would call each week to ask if my bf had been struck by lightning yet
But how? Are they native to your area? You going to steal one? I must know
Nooooo I just realised this post isn’t talking abt Western Australia
Looks like someone is trying out the same question they got at their job interview today
Triple Chocolate because I wanna be as sweet as possible but not in a weird way I didn’t mean it like that
eh he alr then if u were really wanted to correct it u would hv deleted the first message lmao
when you ask 15times in a row, her age will magically change to 18 :) that's how women work, right?
If you wait 6 months between each ask perhaps, by which time he'll be 29 and, probably, in jail
Load More Replies...This will be used as evidence in court, no doubt. Disgusting.
Why are parents letting 10 yr olds having snap? And why are parents that neglectful that it’s allowing their 10 yr old children to add strangers to snap?
I wouldn't assume that the person is actually 10. This could simply be a reason to try and deter Dakota. It's pretty obvious that Dakota assumes the other person is joking, because of the lol and lmao comments.
Load More Replies...Are you tax evasion? Because I’m committed to you 🥵
Load More Replies...Haha! Decades ago, i sent this kinds of messages to some semi-familiar girls!
I never say I love you, it ruins it when you evidently break up. it hurts more
That sounds like a trauma response, rather than a healing response. Sounds like you’ve been thru some stuff tho, hope you’re doing ok :)
Load More Replies...Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer, apparently
I Wanna know how you were able to quote scripture without getting downvoted lol. Last time I tried that I got 23 downvotes, at least
Load More Replies...I once got into my friend’s account with his permission and we were both using that account to talk to a mutual enemy at the same time so our convo with them looked like this
“You suck.” “No I didn’t mean it like that, you are actually worse than anything I could describe.” “What she said.”
Load More Replies...How is this cringe?? It's like "yeah I'm not doing great at all, however I still care about you and focus on your problems instead"?????
Ooooh, omg I totally misunderstood this whole conversation and thought person A thought person B ate the cat
Load More Replies...maybe 1st message about the cat went unnoticed and she went off the handle trying to get a response by stroking the fire with that person who has a eating disorder....
F*****g hell a lot is going on and I hope both people r doing ok
Do you have a brother who also has health insurance? Asking for a friend...
Some people have a condition where they don’t respond to music or hear music like most people do. They either hate it, or have no reaction to it and would rather not
Load More Replies...Because you can fascinate a woman by giving her a piece of cheese (according to some other bp post from a while ago that everyone keeps quoting lol)
Load More Replies...what kind of cheese where you going to feed them (dirty minded joke:)
I would do this to my friends because we would think it's funny
We’re all weird in our own ways and it makes the world a lot funner
Load More Replies...I was told this a lot when I was in my 20s. Lol. And yeah, it's a compliment, imo. I never felt pretty but I sure as H. felt weird a lot. Turns out I have been neurodivergent all that time. Haha! And well.... I was actually pretty in my 20s. Now I just look tired and fat (as a result of being a mom of 3 girls + comfort eating a LOT).
whenever people have told me i'm weird, i say thank you. i'd rather be weird than normal & boring.
i love this compliment uwgHkGWkhdbegkhcbkhwbskjhkwjdgvsjhjhbjhajgshgahgsagh
I used to worry that people might think I'm weird, but now I think it's one of my best traits. I fly my freak-flag with pride, and so should you!
How come the top op's text is blue and the bottom op's text is grey? I feel like this isn't real...
OH. Maybe because the Apple Pay thing is gray, and maybe there was an option to add a message, which came with the Apple Pay message, also making it gray?
Load More Replies...Sorry i didn't see your comment, I fell asleep
Load More Replies...You have nice- uh well you have pretty- um you have a pretty cat, is he a tabby?
GASP! You're soooo superficial, only complimenting my cat on his PATTERN for his LOOKS! And no, he's a TUXEDO! ::sobs:: (joking)
Load More Replies...Y hit me where it hurts bp? Too relatable for my clingy a*s
I swear to god that I only want to talk to you about your car's extended warranty! Now open the DAMN WINDOW and LET ME IN!!! *waves your car's extended warranty threateningly*
*frantically barricading window* BUT I DON'T HAVE A CAR!
Load More Replies...Ooh, can we get recaptcha for text? Someone sends you something sus and you send them a recaptcha and they can't text you again until they rotate the little dog!
Mm, something NF would find a way to rap about, no doubt. Only if he experienced it though.
Load More Replies...Nope. They just don't like large bronze coloured people that make a noise when you hit them
Must be spending a lot of time in that restroom if they are being missed
"Excuse me, the record's stuck, the record's stuck, the record's stuck..."
If I was in the fridge, would you open the door? If I was the grass, would you mow your lawn? If I was your body, would you still wear clothes? If I was a booger, would you blow your nose? Would you keep it? would you eat it? I'm just tryin to give myself a reason, for being around. If I was the front porch swing would you let me hang? If I was the dance floor would you shake your thing? If I was a rubber check would you let me bounce Up and down inside your bank account? Would ya trust me, not to break you? I'm just tryin really hard to make you, Notice me being around. If I was a haircut would you wear a hat? If I was a maid, could I clean your flat? If I was the carpet would ya wipe your feet, In time to save me from mud off the street? If you like me, if you love me, Why don't you get down on your knees And scrub me? I'm a little grubby From being around.
I’d put a stick in front of you, wait till you get on it, and take you somewhere random on the stick bus.
as a person who used to play this game i am laughing so hard rn
One way or another, someone is going to get their balls around a hole
Really? Long stick... pocket... money shot... and you went with balls?
Load More Replies...DOBBY IS FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
They had six months to think up something else to say and failed...
🎵Miku, Miku, you can call me Miku, Blue hair, blue tie, hiding in your wi-fi 🎵
They tried to send it to each of those people individually, and made a group chat instead
Load More Replies...It’s screenshot, not screenshotted, for pity’s sake. You would say a man was “shot”, not a man was “shotted”. This is a huge peeve of mine, like should have, would have, could have…it’s SCREENSHOT.
Awww, poor Matilda. It’s not her fault she was born that way :<
Load More Replies...It’s screenshot, not screenshotted, for pity’s sake. You would say a man was “shot”, not a man was “shotted”. This is a huge peeve of mine, like should have, would have, could have…it’s SCREENSHOT.
Awww, poor Matilda. It’s not her fault she was born that way :<
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