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Pregnant Mom Endures In-Laws’ Secret Insults, Drops Fluent German Bombshell At Explosive Dinner
When you marry someone, you often marry their family too—who can either provide tremendous support or create additional challenges. For this new mom, pregnancy should have drawn the family closer, but instead, she faced a barrage of rude comments from her in-laws.
A Canadian woman living in Germany opened up about her feelings of being judged and criticized by her husband’s family, who made hurtful remarks in German, believing she wouldn’t understand. After enduring their negativity for some time, she finally confronted them in their own language, leaving the family in shock. Keep reading to discover how the situation unfolded.
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Image credits: Candice Picard (not the actual photo)
A Canadian woman confronted her in-laws in German after enduring hurtful comments during her pregnancy
Image credits: August de Richelieu (not the actual photo)
Image credits: katemangostar (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Tara Raye (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Sea-Rip-9749
Partners should genuinely put effort into understanding their in-laws
When it comes to love, barriers like caste, background, or language often become unimportant. When you truly connect with someone, these factors seem secondary. Many couples bridge language gaps by learning each other’s mother tongues, or simply communicate in a language they both know well.
However, marrying someone often means forming bonds with their family too. Building a connection with in-laws can make a big difference in family harmony, and it helps to engage with their culture and traditions.
Spending time with your in-laws on holidays or special family occasions is one way to show you care. These shared moments create memories and can help build a foundation of trust and understanding.
Another thoughtful gesture is trying to learn their language. Even picking up a few common phrases can go a long way in showing respect for their background and making them feel valued.
Trying to understand your in-laws’ values, traditions, and perspectives can help foster mutual respect
With in-laws, honesty often works best. Openly sharing your likes, dislikes, and expectations allows them to get to know you better. Being upfront about what bothers you can clear up misunderstandings early on, and it’s equally important to listen to their perspectives.
Try to avoid taking things too personally. At times, you may feel the need to step back and see things from their perspective. Understanding their intentions and values can help avoid unnecessary conflicts.
Sometimes, it takes a little extra effort to build empathy for your in-laws. This can mean stepping into their shoes for a moment to appreciate their viewpoints, even if they don’t align with yours.
In this particular story, the in-laws were clearly in the wrong for speaking negatively about the author behind her back. But it raises an interesting question—was it right for the author to keep secrets from them? Have you ever had a challenging experience with in-laws? How did you handle it? Share your thoughts and stories with us.
The majority of readers took the author’s side, assuring her that she did nothing wrong
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Trillian 11 months ago
I am German and my son had a girl called Lilith in his class. Only difference is the pronunciation since we don't have the th sound, it was pronounced with a t at the end. I have never heard of that supposed meaning and everyone thought it was just a variation of Lily.
Joe Reaves 11 months ago
Lillith was Adam's first wife in some mythologies. She wouldn't submit to his authority so was replaced. Long live the Lilliths of this world, I say!
Load More Replies...
Pyla 11 months ago
This reeks of fake. No way would she not have, out of courtesy, shown she spoke German. Tired of torrid fiction torn off reddit to fill space here.
Lyla 11 months ago
Yeah, none of this sounds believable. Even OP’s answers just sound too polished.
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Winnie the Moo 11 months ago
Why didn’t the husband stand up for her on his own? Why did he have to be told by his wife that she doesn’t like it when his family talks about her this way? The only normal person in thus story is OP. The rest are a******s.
Agat 11 months ago
She sayid they weren't talking trash about her when he was around.
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Xenia Harley 11 months ago
German in-laws should not have assumed! It is always rude to talk about other people, especially in front of them! I grew up speaking five languages, but had to accent in English. My aunt had this happen that two men thought she was only an English speaker, and were insulting her. She spoke to them in the language there were insulting in, to their face, to let them know the understood. I don't see how this is at all OP's fault if her in-laws are such rude people! They know they screwed up. Now, they are trying to blame the victim of their rudeness. Nope! Shouldn't assume anything!
Verena 11 months ago
As the word "hokey" does not deliver any German word, I would like to know what they originally said. And I would like to know how fluent and up-to-date OPs knowledge of the German of that region is. I live in a country where the language is not my mother tongue, and do translations between my mother tongue (German) and the language of that country (Dutch, and the local variation of the province's dialect, Zeeuws). I am also called in during tourist season by neighbours and friends in the tourist business, to extinguish flaming hot arguments because details got lost in poor translations and people feel accused and belittled. Foreign languague one does not use and hear every day are thin ice when it comes to communication. So I would like to read the original German things the relatives said, and I would like to hear their reasoning why Lilith feels like not to be a good name for for that child. Maybe some family history, or a friend's kid of the same name died.
Petra Peitsch 11 months ago
It's hockey ... the word in german. OP mispelled, but it's understandable.
Load More Replies...
Paul Rabit 11 months ago
OP has been living in Germany for months and didn't bother to tell the family that she spoke German? That's weird. Also, Lilith has always been a weird name to me - like I get it that's fairly common, but it's like naming your kid Lucifer - it's just an odd choice, and/or speaks to someone not bothering to learn the meaning of the name they are giving to a whole human being. All THAT judgement said, OP and her husband can name their baby what they like, and there's never an excuse to talk about other people behind their back.
Lupita Nyong'heaux 9 months ago
lilith and lucifer would only be weird names to name your kid to people who are christians or possibly other abrahamic religions. (i don't know if the other two have a lilith or lucifer reference, so i can't speak on that.) but, otherwise, both would be just names to people who didn't follow those religions, quite pretty ones at that, IMO.
Load More Replies...
Karina 11 months ago
I dont understand how "she speaks german too" wasnt one of the first thing that came out of bf mouth when he told his family about her. He sounds a bit selfobsessed, but that sounds fishy. I also dont know anyone from a different language who dosnt have fun trying to eighter teach or embarres the visitor with "say this and that" in the foreign language, especially kids. So that also sounds a bit fishy.
Israel Martinez 11 months ago
There's always that one YTA ... never disappoints at being disappointing ... ... and I know she meant "definitely," but "defiantly" fits so much better in the context ...
kissmychakram 11 months ago
OP is definitely an A, if this is real. If she spoke German why on earth hadn't she attempted to speak to her in-laws in their native language before? Why not on first meeting for goodness sake, when she was presumably hoping to make a good impression?
Trillian 11 months ago
I am German and my son had a girl called Lilith in his class. Only difference is the pronunciation since we don't have the th sound, it was pronounced with a t at the end. I have never heard of that supposed meaning and everyone thought it was just a variation of Lily.
Joe Reaves 11 months ago
Lillith was Adam's first wife in some mythologies. She wouldn't submit to his authority so was replaced. Long live the Lilliths of this world, I say!
Load More Replies... Pyla 11 months ago
This reeks of fake. No way would she not have, out of courtesy, shown she spoke German. Tired of torrid fiction torn off reddit to fill space here.
Lyla 11 months ago
Yeah, none of this sounds believable. Even OP’s answers just sound too polished.
Load More Replies... Winnie the Moo 11 months ago
Why didn’t the husband stand up for her on his own? Why did he have to be told by his wife that she doesn’t like it when his family talks about her this way? The only normal person in thus story is OP. The rest are a******s.
Agat 11 months ago
She sayid they weren't talking trash about her when he was around.
Load More Replies... Xenia Harley 11 months ago
German in-laws should not have assumed! It is always rude to talk about other people, especially in front of them! I grew up speaking five languages, but had to accent in English. My aunt had this happen that two men thought she was only an English speaker, and were insulting her. She spoke to them in the language there were insulting in, to their face, to let them know the understood. I don't see how this is at all OP's fault if her in-laws are such rude people! They know they screwed up. Now, they are trying to blame the victim of their rudeness. Nope! Shouldn't assume anything!
Verena 11 months ago
As the word "hokey" does not deliver any German word, I would like to know what they originally said. And I would like to know how fluent and up-to-date OPs knowledge of the German of that region is. I live in a country where the language is not my mother tongue, and do translations between my mother tongue (German) and the language of that country (Dutch, and the local variation of the province's dialect, Zeeuws). I am also called in during tourist season by neighbours and friends in the tourist business, to extinguish flaming hot arguments because details got lost in poor translations and people feel accused and belittled. Foreign languague one does not use and hear every day are thin ice when it comes to communication. So I would like to read the original German things the relatives said, and I would like to hear their reasoning why Lilith feels like not to be a good name for for that child. Maybe some family history, or a friend's kid of the same name died.
Petra Peitsch 11 months ago
It's hockey ... the word in german. OP mispelled, but it's understandable.
Load More Replies... Paul Rabit 11 months ago
OP has been living in Germany for months and didn't bother to tell the family that she spoke German? That's weird. Also, Lilith has always been a weird name to me - like I get it that's fairly common, but it's like naming your kid Lucifer - it's just an odd choice, and/or speaks to someone not bothering to learn the meaning of the name they are giving to a whole human being. All THAT judgement said, OP and her husband can name their baby what they like, and there's never an excuse to talk about other people behind their back.
Lupita Nyong'heaux 9 months ago
lilith and lucifer would only be weird names to name your kid to people who are christians or possibly other abrahamic religions. (i don't know if the other two have a lilith or lucifer reference, so i can't speak on that.) but, otherwise, both would be just names to people who didn't follow those religions, quite pretty ones at that, IMO.
Load More Replies... Karina 11 months ago
I dont understand how "she speaks german too" wasnt one of the first thing that came out of bf mouth when he told his family about her. He sounds a bit selfobsessed, but that sounds fishy. I also dont know anyone from a different language who dosnt have fun trying to eighter teach or embarres the visitor with "say this and that" in the foreign language, especially kids. So that also sounds a bit fishy.
Israel Martinez 11 months ago
There's always that one YTA ... never disappoints at being disappointing ... ... and I know she meant "definitely," but "defiantly" fits so much better in the context ...
kissmychakram 11 months ago
OP is definitely an A, if this is real. If she spoke German why on earth hadn't she attempted to speak to her in-laws in their native language before? Why not on first meeting for goodness sake, when she was presumably hoping to make a good impression?
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