Macaulay Culkin Might Be One Of The Funniest People On Twitter, And Here Are 30 Of His Tweets To Prove It
Macaulay Culkin's performances in the Home Alone franchise, Richie Rich and My Girl defined the childhoods of most '90s kids. But now, decades later, he continues entertaining the same people as adults. The only thing that has changed is that he's doing it on the Internet instead of the big screen.
Turns out, the actor has a strong Twitter game, and we've been sleeping on it for way too long. Self-deprecating humor, interesting and unique insights, he is sharing it all and he's absolutely shameless. Continue scrolling to check out a refined collection of his best tweets and let us know if you think we need to take away Ryan Reynolds' Twitter comedian crown and give it to Macaulay instead.
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First one having to do with politics, I won't look at any more cuz I'm SICK of politics..
Yes. But they were max 72 hrs not indefinitely and overcrowded. Big difference.
Load More Replies...Yes. But they were max 72 hrs not indefinitely and overcrowded. Big difference.
Load More Replies...Well, then you really shouldn't look up Democrat Janet Rheno and the Cuban Elian case where she had them rip the boy from his fathers arms at gun point from inside of their closet hiding. Yep, those were the same democrats pointing fingers at Trump now.
Trump gives more f**k than his opponents at least - to differentiate hipocrisy from authenticity is not easy for so many of us.
It's really nice to see Culkin back on track.
In the years following Home Alone's release, he stayed very busy in Hollywood. The year 1991 cemented his stardom as Culkin had a role in Saturday morning cartoon series Wish Kid, hosted Saturday Night Live, appeared in Michael Jackson's Black or White music video, and even performed in the successful film My Girl. But after reprising the role of Kevin McCallister in 1992's Home Alone 2: Lost in New York and playing a villain in 1993 thriller The Good Son, the boy's career took a major downturn.
The movies he had starred in in 1994 bombed at the box office, severely dampening the actor's "stock" at the ripe age of 14. An outrageously famous actor at such a young age, Culkin's stardom already seemed like it was burning out.
And I thought you get satanic messages, like when listening to some songs in reverse :D
I find this rather funny since it basically mirrors the utter non sense written in the bible
Load More Replies...And then suddenly a snake runs backwards on it's tail, a girl turns into a rib, a man turns into dust, all other creation disappears, and everything goes black.
. . .as we continue the rewind, things are getting smaller and smaller, a huge flash, an explosion, things continue getting smaller AND we reach the singularity. WHEW right back where it all started (in theory of course).
Load More Replies...During an interview with Ellen Degeneres, Culkin also mentioned what it was like to turn 18 and have an absolute mountain of money come his way from his successful child-acting days. "I felt like some kid worked really, really hard, and I inherited all of his money. It allows me to treat everything like a hobby. I do nothing for my dinner nowadays." While all of that money he made with Home Alone has set Culkin up for life, he's also found how hard it is to break back into Hollywood after leaving.
Now, however, Macaulay Culkin seems content to live his life mostly out of the spotlight, hanging out in Paris where he kind of does whatever he feels like. In 2018, he said it's hard for him to live a normal life because everyone recognizes him everywhere, and fans on the street always want him to recreate his famous hands-on-face "scream" look from Home Alone. But even though he hit the apex of fame so young, he doesn't seem crushed about anything. In August 2018, Culkin told People that he and his girlfriend, Brenda Song, "have a good life" which is honestly all anybody can ask for.
What have you missed? Probably nothing, as you might've once heard a rumor that he died. And if not, you know the rumor at least, it's just the usual stereotype of "burnt-out former child-stars". and I don't mean to imply that Mac here fits that type (obviously, he doesn't), but he's always gonna be canon-fodder for that kinda talk. ...along with the endless requesting of "Hey hey Man, do that face thing! ..with your hands, y'know?"
Load More Replies...Solo !? (!) Are you an in-law relative or grandkid or something to that first laughing-comment above? (few hours before you, looks like). Possible you might have some dark Force in your midichlorians, from the sound of that sinister laugh you're hackling there...
Load More Replies...Imagine the ribbing he would be getting if his last name was “Flower”.
Should he feel good about all the 9-year-olds that now have the confidence to defend the house?
GO TO SEATTLE, PORTLAND AND CHICAGO.. ROBBERS RULE THE ROOST..(BURGLARS)
Oh it is so BIZZARE to see him as an adult. Plain weird.
Load More Replies...He looks just like he did in the movies if you look past the beard ofc!
Haha this is just like the immigration situation in Sweden where obvious adults claim to be kids and everybody just plays along and pretend like nothing weird is going on, to the point of absurdity, to not be called a racist xD
They should do a sequel but as an action/thriller, and have him kick the asses of burglars in epic action scenes.
I have no shame buying tampons because it's not like the clerk is going to think they are for me (and if he does, well then I don't really want to hear what his mind is thinking). It's really just advertising "I'm intimate with a woman!"
I heard this story about a girl who was very embarrassed about getting pads and tampons and she told her mom to get them and her mom told everyone they knew
I remember buying tampons for the guys when we worked on cars, they were cheaper than the gas or oil filters they were used for.
I never thought about that... and now it really does feel like the sky is falling!
Load More Replies...Isn't that just the perfect explanation for fog that you could give to a child when they ask "why is fog?" etc, you know the kind of thing kids ask lol! There is actually a good bit in a Dean Koontz book with a kid and fog lol
Also, Thank Snow White for stopping people from taking apples from old ladies.
Like when Charlie Chaplin came in 3rd place in a "Charlie Chaplin Lookalike" contest.
Charlie Chaplin entered a "Charlie Chaplin look-a-like" competition and came 2nd.
Good point! *Remembers the gazillion fighting-on-top-of-a-train scenes in Gargoyles*
Lol, that was actually brilliant lol! Maybe you need to have been a kid who watched Home Alone when it first came out, and grew up through the technology evolution to REALLY appreciate it though lol!
You definitely still have a place in Hollywood... get your a*s over there!
he's awesome, i'm a little woman with a lot of "young men interested" ,not me, no websites or apps involved ,i'm from 80's, and steve buscemi is rocking. I would like to look like steve buscemi^^
Load More Replies...He missed Casualty. Every British actor cuts their teeth in that show. Orlando Bloom, Tom Hiddleston and Kate Winslet included.
Bro hero Fiennes tiffin lmao he was young Tom riddle and he wants to be in GoT
Read Bunnicula (vampire bunny drinks veggie juice, scared family cat & dog). True Story!
u make me feel a bit sick right here *pointing my tummy* 😰🙏
I love this!!! While Peaches are delicious, Nectarines are simply by far the best fruit ever!!!!!
Correct! Nectarines and peaches are the same species. The skin of nectarines lacks the fuzz (fruit-skin trichomes) that peach-skin has, and it is thought that a mutation in a single gene (MYB25) is responsible for the hair or no-hair difference between the two.
Oh, I could so eat a nectarine right now. Only have apples ☹ Not even any biscuits in the house!! Rats, going to have to eat that apple.
Peach fuzz makes my lips itch. That's why I like nectarines...
Ancient praise for the nectarine from comedy royalty... The 2,000‐year‐old man was first heard from in 1950 when Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner began improvising a series of comic conversations in which Brooks impersonated the ancient man and Reiner was his interviewer. The conversations became the basis of a very popular series of record albums. Here are some bits from the first album: “Most people are interested in living a long and fruitful life, as you have. Fruit is good, too. Fruit kept me going for 140 years once when I was on a very strict diet. Mainly nectarines. I love that fruit. It's half a peach, half a plum. It's a helluva fruit, it's not too cold, not too hot. Just nice. Even a rotten one is good. That's how much I love 'em. I'd rather eat a rotten nectarine than a fine plum, what do you think of that?”
I'm allergic to the skin on most fruit, including nectarines. Do you know how tedious it is to peel a nectarine? Or peel a plum? Or a kiwi... it's ridiculous
Try the dip in boiling water for a few seconds then dunking in an ice bath method, just like tomatoes. Makes it easier to remove the skin.
Load More Replies...The fact that he referenced "the barbecue" automatically gets you the invite in my book!
i‘m so glad someone else got that reference. and: yes, i think that‘s the joke here, but remember: Duchamp‘s „fountain“ is full of ambiguity.
Load More Replies...Y'know, he kinda looks like an old after-school care teacher I had...
"[...] as someone who's eaten a lot of ramen in his life, here's a tip: leave a few noodles uncooked and then sprinkle them on top afterwards like a garnish. Gives you an extra little fun bonus crunch."
I honestly can't decide if that is genius or just sad. ;)
Load More Replies...I prefer to make ramen than watch the Oscars too. The noodles are easier to digest than all the self-congratulatory rubbish.
MC could definitely fill an entire chapter of "Stars: They're just like us."
If only a man in a tux was cooking me dinner. Besides the Oscars are really boring
Uncle George is the first thing I thought of. LLAP
Load More Replies...Otters are the true answer to the question: What is the cutest wild animal? Unfortunately, they aren't always the first to be thought of.
Obviously, if you can eat the whole thing yourself and not feel bad about it, it's a cupcake. If you eat the whole thing and feel unrelenting guilt, it's a cake.
"Mini cupcakes?! As in the mini version of regular cupcakes?! Which is already a mini version of cake? Honestly where does it end with you people!"
I think cakes usually have layers so if it doesn’t it’s a huge cupcake
A cupcake is just a cake that can fit in a cup. Anything bigger than that (aka cannot fit in a cup) is a cake. XD
I've actually seen a "giant cupcake" in a shop, which is like a full-sized cake but in the shape of a cupcake. I guess giants have bigger cups than I do.
I think it's hilarious that a lot of people who made fun of D&D geeks back in school play fantasy sports leagues now. It's the same thing, but much more boring. No wizards, no dragons, no magic swords, etc.
exactly. all jocks that make fun of smart people or those with glasses as being nerds are actually nerds themselves- just sports ones
Load More Replies...Is there such a thing as fantasy hockey? Also too bad instead of magic; the QB, or centers in other fantasy sports don't have something like radar to complete passing games, or rocket bursts for runner/forwards, or force fields for linemen, defense men. The powers could vary depending on what kind of sports drinks you buy and have on the bench.
I guess I'll never know what an actual froot tastes like. Froot Loops are only froot FLAVORED loops.
a cross between "Home Alone" and "A Christmas Story" and a rip off of both!
I think you have a case for employment discrimination. Bastarts!
That would be the bat 🦇 I believe! Or maybe a pangolin?
Load More Replies...Not the same, but close-ish: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4w-eLx9IksQ
Works a bit easier in the UK where we call them chips! Chips of potato which can be oven baked chips, pan-fried chips, triple-fried chips, microwaved chips... Crisps being the term used for the packets of thin-sliced crispy potato snacks because, well, they ARE crisp!
And now I want to try triple fried. Sounds heart stoppingly delicious
Load More Replies...I love anomalies like that - what's the language?
Load More Replies...Now we need another cameo of Macaulay Culkin with Mark Rober
They done that. Long ago. Also mark robber promotes something as honeybee which steels people's info. He may be intelligent but he is also an a*****e
Load More Replies...omg, I love watching Mark Rober and they worked together very well! :)
Very funny, I saw 3 shooting stars a few days ago, and I was told that I'm "hallucinating". Fun fact: it was the middle of the night.
There's no more Ninja movies because a bunch of wining tuckfards will accuse the producers of cultural appropriation.
I love zucchinis! Have you tried oven-baked sliced zucchinis? They're sooooo good!!
If you want to build yourself a gladiator ring, that sounds AWESOME!!!! FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS MACAULAY!!!
these lol, idk how to explain them xD Untitled-i...acb436.jpg
The Bond girls do. You...you do know there other characters...don't you?
Load More Replies...Went and I am sure I would have TONS of regret... if I could remember it LOL
Load More Replies...That's because you can't gracefully fart. You have to let it go fully and freely to really enjoy the satisfaction of utter relief
LMAO... This is so true, I want to upvote this more than once.
Load More Replies...I always wonder this about the coffee where the beans pass through the digestive system of a cat. Why?
I knew a guy named Richard D**k... we called him Double D**k. I think his parents must have hated him...
I knew a Richard C*x who eventually joined the navy. Thusly becoming Seaman D**k C*x.
Load More Replies...Since when does Richard stand for D**k?! 🤔 What did I miss???
THEY. ARE. THE. WORST. Don't lie, we all eat pop tarts because the frosting looks appetising! NOW THEY ARE JUST HAVING HORRIBLE QUANTITY CONTROL!
If you bathe unfrosted pop tarts in butter when they are still hot from the toaster then they taste like pie and are amazing! They used to have an apple pop tart that was awesome but sugar cinnamon with butter is life changing.
Yeah, not a good idea. Why do you think the police came up with the battering ram?
The actor playing crackhead-priest (named "Matthew Mara") is David Hornsby, the cousin of musician Bruce Hornsby , husband of Emily Deschanel, and brother-in-law of Zooey Deschanel. -- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Hornsby
I never realized how many people stole your looks... I knew they were gone, but...
There are different types of candy corn and the only one that's any good is Brach's, which has a distinct honey flavor.
Maybe Gomorrah, the city that was destroyed like Sodom. That’ll serve as a good sign to the little gremlins who cut the line for the slide
I think the reverse would be funnier. Someone expecting the SPLORSH of a tomato to the face, instead getting the THUD of an apple would be bloody hilarious.
These are too good and show he's just fine. Kevin was him, not the reverse.
Macaulay Culkin owns a website called Bunny Ears. It's loaded with comedy articles, and many are actually funny. Some people who used to write for Cracked, College Humor, etc. back when they were good post their work there.
Thank you. I’ve never heard of this site before, but I just went; the articles I’ve read so far are hilarious! Definitely one I will be frequenting often!
Load More Replies...He WAS a drug-addicted idiot. He turned his life around a few years back and is a great influence for people seeking to do the same.
He was addicted to drugs due to many reasons. Calling him an idiot is not necessary at all.
Load More Replies...These are too good and show he's just fine. Kevin was him, not the reverse.
Macaulay Culkin owns a website called Bunny Ears. It's loaded with comedy articles, and many are actually funny. Some people who used to write for Cracked, College Humor, etc. back when they were good post their work there.
Thank you. I’ve never heard of this site before, but I just went; the articles I’ve read so far are hilarious! Definitely one I will be frequenting often!
Load More Replies...He WAS a drug-addicted idiot. He turned his life around a few years back and is a great influence for people seeking to do the same.
He was addicted to drugs due to many reasons. Calling him an idiot is not necessary at all.
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