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Macaulay Culkin's performances in the Home Alone franchise, Richie Rich and My Girl defined the childhoods of most '90s kids. But now, decades later, he continues entertaining the same people as adults. The only thing that has changed is that he's doing it on the Internet instead of the big screen.

Turns out, the actor has a strong Twitter game, and we've been sleeping on it for way too long. Self-deprecating humor, interesting and unique insights, he is sharing it all and he's absolutely shameless. Continue scrolling to check out a refined collection of his best tweets and let us know if you think we need to take away Ryan Reynolds' Twitter comedian crown and give it to Macaulay instead.

More info: Twitter

#1

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Gerrit
Community Member
5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This should be higher up!

BuRny BuRn
Community Member
5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

First one having to do with politics, I won't look at any more cuz I'm SICK of politics..

David Boyce
Community Member
5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hold on there, the history shows the kids in cages started with Obama

Monika Rhodes
Community Member
5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. But they were max 72 hrs not indefinitely and overcrowded. Big difference.

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Lora West
Community Member
5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He forgot to mention the cages Obama and Biden built.

Monika Rhodes
Community Member
5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. But they were max 72 hrs not indefinitely and overcrowded. Big difference.

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Sergio Serg
Community Member
5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, then you really shouldn't look up Democrat Janet Rheno and the Cuban Elian case where she had them rip the boy from his fathers arms at gun point from inside of their closet hiding. Yep, those were the same democrats pointing fingers at Trump now.

Vicki Garrison
Community Member
5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

BEFORE WE BEGIN IT WASN'T HIS FAULT.

Ottmar Straub
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Trump gives more f**k than his opponents at least - to differentiate hipocrisy from authenticity is not easy for so many of us.

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It's really nice to see Culkin back on track.

In the years following Home Alone's release, he stayed very busy in Hollywood. The year 1991 cemented his stardom as Culkin had a role in Saturday morning cartoon series Wish Kid, hosted Saturday Night Live, appeared in Michael Jackson's Black or White music video, and even performed in the successful film My Girl. But after reprising the role of Kevin McCallister in 1992's Home Alone 2: Lost in New York and playing a villain in 1993 thriller The Good Son, the boy's career took a major downturn.

The movies he had starred in in 1994 bombed at the box office, severely dampening the actor's "stock" at the ripe age of 14. An outrageously famous actor at such a young age, Culkin's stardom already seemed like it was burning out.

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    #2

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    Janine B.
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bwahahaha! 😂😂😂

    Lyn Jo
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And the woman go back into dust and then left the man alone with bunch of animals.

    Wendy Solo
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love this guy's sense of humour.

    Night Owl
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And I thought you get satanic messages, like when listening to some songs in reverse :D

    Dorothy Cloud
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    .........and people find this funny.

    wifeofweasley
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I find this rather funny since it basically mirrors the utter non sense written in the bible

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    Steve Cruz
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Makes more sense than reading it as is!

    Randy Klefbeck
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then suddenly a snake runs backwards on it's tail, a girl turns into a rib, a man turns into dust, all other creation disappears, and everything goes black.

    MH3
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    . . .as we continue the rewind, things are getting smaller and smaller, a huge flash, an explosion, things continue getting smaller AND we reach the singularity. WHEW right back where it all started (in theory of course).

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    During an interview with Ellen Degeneres, Culkin also mentioned what it was like to turn 18 and have an absolute mountain of money come his way from his successful child-acting days. "I felt like some kid worked really, really hard, and I inherited all of his money. It allows me to treat everything like a hobby. I do nothing for my dinner nowadays." While all of that money he made with Home Alone has set Culkin up for life, he's also found how hard it is to break back into Hollywood after leaving.

    Now, however, Macaulay Culkin seems content to live his life mostly out of the spotlight, hanging out in Paris where he kind of does whatever he feels like. In 2018, he said it's hard for him to live a normal life because everyone recognizes him everywhere, and fans on the street always want him to recreate his famous hands-on-face "scream" look from Home Alone. But even though he hit the apex of fame so young, he doesn't seem crushed about anything. In August 2018, Culkin told People that he and his girlfriend, Brenda Song, "have a good life" which is honestly all anybody can ask for.

    #3

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    Eowyn Kendrick
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I- I I I I just-i I can't right now

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    #4

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    Darth Vader
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hahahahahahahhahahahhahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahh

    Amy G
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I read this in Darth Vader’s voice.

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    Thumbs Down
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What have you missed? Probably nothing, as you might've once heard a rumor that he died. And if not, you know the rumor at least, it's just the usual stereotype of "burnt-out former child-stars". and I don't mean to imply that Mac here fits that type (obviously, he doesn't), but he's always gonna be canon-fodder for that kinda talk. ...along with the endless requesting of "Hey hey Man, do that face thing! ..with your hands, y'know?"

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    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Solo !? (!) Are you an in-law relative or grandkid or something to that first laughing-comment above? (few hours before you, looks like). Possible you might have some dark Force in your midichlorians, from the sound of that sinister laugh you're hackling there...

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    Joshua Leung
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You are a cat with 7 lives remaining🙂

    Anor Anor
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You have been reborn Macaulay

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    #5

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    Queen Mab
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This collie looks exactly like the beautiful and noble dog on that Bart ordered on The Simpsons, Laddie who could do fantastic tricks leaving poor Santa's Little Helper in the dust.

    Jaybird3939
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is that how Sean Connery would pronounce your name?

    Jane W.
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's some collie, Culkin!

    Darleen S alkalili
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imagine the ribbing he would be getting if his last name was “Flower”.

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    Jeff Diamond
    Community Member
    5 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Should he feel good about all the 9-year-olds that now have the confidence to defend the house?

    Raine Soo
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, you have to admit that Kevin was pretty good at protecting his castle.

    Andy Johnson
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    GO TO SEATTLE, PORTLAND AND CHICAGO.. ROBBERS RULE THE ROOST..(BURGLARS)

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    #7

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    Dorothy Parker
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Truly love how he's grown up.

    RandomBeing
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh it is so BIZZARE to see him as an adult. Plain weird.

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    Thumbs Down
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "HomeAlone...Together" -- streaming soon to a Quarantine near you

    Steven Essex
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want to comment about the boxer briefs and the legs...

    i0ana
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This has to be way more up,bcs is reality, even be4 pandemic!!! :)

    Azure Adams
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    accurate and he would still be living with his parents

    Popcorn Colonel
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He looks just like he did in the movies if you look past the beard ofc!

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    #8

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    Thumbs Down
    Community Member
    5 years ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    Klas Klättermus
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha this is just like the immigration situation in Sweden where obvious adults claim to be kids and everybody just plays along and pretend like nothing weird is going on, to the point of absurdity, to not be called a racist xD

    Steve Cruz
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It be funnier than "remaking" a film that still plays every year.

    Up All Night
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They should do a sequel but as an action/thriller, and have him kick the asses of burglars in epic action scenes.

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    Johnny
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have no shame buying tampons because it's not like the clerk is going to think they are for me (and if he does, well then I don't really want to hear what his mind is thinking). It's really just advertising "I'm intimate with a woman!"

    Claire
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why don't more men think this? Thank you.

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    That one rando
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I heard this story about a girl who was very embarrassed about getting pads and tampons and she told her mom to get them and her mom told everyone they knew

    Jane Alexander
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I remember buying tampons for the guys when we worked on cars, they were cheaper than the gas or oil filters they were used for.

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    #10

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    troufaki13
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fun fact: clouds actually weigh tons!

    Spikey Bunny
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never thought about that... and now it really does feel like the sky is falling!

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    Claire Armstrong
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Isn't that just the perfect explanation for fog that you could give to a child when they ask "why is fog?" etc, you know the kind of thing kids ask lol! There is actually a good bit in a Dean Koontz book with a kid and fog lol

    GeeGee
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I skydived and fell through a cloud. It was cold. You are not missing much.

    Firkin Dirkin
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm from Scotland, the land of mists... always felt this too!

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    Catlady6000
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It does contain some really good advice

    Miss Cris
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Snow White should have listened to him :(

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    Norah Reilly
    Community Member
    Premium
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LMAO LMAO LMAO!!!

    Lilly O'Rourke
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Also, Thank Snow White for stopping people from taking apples from old ladies.

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    Thumbs Down
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ...and also for the NEXT thirty years to come!

    #13

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    Demongrrrrl
    Community Member
    Premium
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like when Charlie Chaplin came in 3rd place in a "Charlie Chaplin Lookalike" contest.

    Lisa Bateman
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Charlie Chaplin entered a "Charlie Chaplin look-a-like" competition and came 2nd.

    mimi w
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    oh he looks like the home alone guy a little bit

    Lana Jig-maker
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it's the bunny ears. AI is not calibrated to deal with bunny ears.

    Margaret Brodie
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    Arctic Fox Lover
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yep. I'd probably be only 17% myself on a celeb comparison site.

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    Catlady6000
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This does make me wonder just how often that happens in real life

    FridayFeels
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd have a sign that said no fighting.

    Kylo Wren (Wren St. Germain)
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good point! *Remembers the gazillion fighting-on-top-of-a-train scenes in Gargoyles*

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    #15

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    Claire Armstrong
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lol, that was actually brilliant lol! Maybe you need to have been a kid who watched Home Alone when it first came out, and grew up through the technology evolution to REALLY appreciate it though lol!

    Sarah Stalder
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where do I watch it? I read the Charlie Chaplin thingy.

    Teza
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This keeps setting off my google 😅 anyone else?

    Deborah Hall
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You definitely still have a place in Hollywood... get your a*s over there!

    Chouchou
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Here it is- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-e2J7kLZxb0

    Celiene O'Hara
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never saw that! That was great!!

    SF Angel
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why have I never seen this before? It's wonderful

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    #16

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    cassiushumanmother
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    he's awesome, i'm a little woman with a lot of "young men interested" ,not me, no websites or apps involved ,i'm from 80's, and steve buscemi is rocking. I would like to look like steve buscemi^^

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    Jane Alexander
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Macauley looks just fine as Macaulay!

    panda punch
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    what is ryan gosling did the same thing

    Dorothy Cloud
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is the only enjoyable one on here!

    MH3
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If only Gosling were as talented.

    Kanga9ine
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need to look in your mirror. I look in mine and see Nick Nolte in "Down and out in Beverly Hills".

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    Janine B.
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Except Sir Ian and Sir Christopher. :)

    kurisutofu
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's why he said "if you can't place them"

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    Judy Waddle
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or Doctor Who or Lord of the Rings

    Emily Softley
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He missed Casualty. Every British actor cuts their teeth in that show. Orlando Bloom, Tom Hiddleston and Kate Winslet included.

    Sarcasm101
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bro hero Fiennes tiffin lmao he was young Tom riddle and he wants to be in GoT

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    littlesaresare
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or is blood just person juice?

    Cami Ereth
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Read Bunnicula (vampire bunny drinks veggie juice, scared family cat & dog). True Story!

    William Alexander Bradley Putera
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    u make me feel a bit sick right here *pointing my tummy* 😰🙏

    Sarcasm101
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If tomato is a fruit does that mean ketchup is a jam or jelly?

    Frances Kittery
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eggs are essentially chicken menstruation. Enjoy your breakfast!

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    Melissa Sawicki
    Community Member
    Premium
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love this!!! While Peaches are delicious, Nectarines are simply by far the best fruit ever!!!!!

    MrTree1779
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Correct! Nectarines and peaches are the same species. The skin of nectarines lacks the fuzz (fruit-skin trichomes) that peach-skin has, and it is thought that a mutation in a single gene (MYB25) is responsible for the hair or no-hair difference between the two.

    Kanga9ine
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Peaches are nectarines going through puberty.

    Alex Bailey
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh, I could so eat a nectarine right now. Only have apples ☹ Not even any biscuits in the house!! Rats, going to have to eat that apple.

    Tracy
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agree. Biting into the fuzzy skin on a peach gives me goosebumps. I like peaches but will only eat them peeled because I hate the feeling of goosebumps. Nectarines are more convenient.

    Janine Hunt-Jackson
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Peach fuzz makes my lips itch. That's why I like nectarines...

    Podunkus
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ancient praise for the nectarine from comedy royalty... The 2,000‐year‐old man was first heard from in 1950 when Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner began improvising a series of comic conversations in which Brooks impersonated the ancient man and Reiner was his interviewer. The conversations became the basis of a very popular series of record albums. Here are some bits from the first album: “Most people are interested in living a long and fruitful life, as you have. Fruit is good, too. Fruit kept me going for 140 years once when I was on a very strict diet. Mainly nectarines. I love that fruit. It's half a peach, half a plum. It's a helluva fruit, it's not too cold, not too hot. Just nice. Even a rotten one is good. That's how much I love 'em. I'd rather eat a rotten nectarine than a fine plum, what do you think of that?”

    bryguy
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm allergic to the skin on most fruit, including nectarines. Do you know how tedious it is to peel a nectarine? Or peel a plum? Or a kiwi... it's ridiculous

    Cat Chow
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Try the dip in boiling water for a few seconds then dunking in an ice bath method, just like tomatoes. Makes it easier to remove the skin.

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    I Just Changed My Name
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The fact that he referenced "the barbecue" automatically gets you the invite in my book!

    #21

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    Gerrit
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love how he's making fun of himself!

    Kady Maree Mcgrath
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    THE PHANTOM MENACE STAR WARS IN THE TOP ROW

    MCathenaE
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love the t-shirt, but is he calling himself a urinal?

    Sebastian Mayer
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i‘m so glad someone else got that reference. and: yes, i think that‘s the joke here, but remember: Duchamp‘s „fountain“ is full of ambiguity.

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    RandomBeing
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    im way too young to be nostalgic about vhs tapes and yet...

    Meinke Vo
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He found the one corner without Nukie.

    Arctic Fox Lover
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Y'know, he kinda looks like an old after-school care teacher I had...

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    Gerrit
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "[...] as someone who's eaten a lot of ramen in his life, here's a tip: leave a few noodles uncooked and then sprinkle them on top afterwards like a garnish. Gives you an extra little fun bonus crunch."

    Raine Soo
    Community Member
    5 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I prefer to make ramen than watch the Oscars too. The noodles are easier to digest than all the self-congratulatory rubbish.

    Brandi VanSteenwyk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    MC could definitely fill an entire chapter of "Stars: They're just like us."

    Kim Lionessa
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I like to plus mine up with bok choi.

    Just another bot
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If only a man in a tux was cooking me dinner. Besides the Oscars are really boring

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    Steven Essex
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like the start of a bad joke...

    Elsker
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now i want to know the rest of it...

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    Colleen Stadnick
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    George Takai would looooovvvvvveeeeeeee this!

    Laura Deckers
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Uncle George is the first thing I thought of. LLAP

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    Brandi VanSteenwyk
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Otters are the true answer to the question: What is the cutest wild animal? Unfortunately, they aren't always the first to be thought of.

    DC
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Carve it in a stone, Kev!

    Kittie Penna
    Community Member
    5 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    He's really got to let this Home Alone thing go.

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    Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa)
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Obviously, if you can eat the whole thing yourself and not feel bad about it, it's a cupcake. If you eat the whole thing and feel unrelenting guilt, it's a cake.

    Jon S.
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Presumably at the point the volume exceeds 1 cup, it stops being a cupcake? So larger than this size, I would say yes, they are the same thing.

    Nicky OldfieldDesciple
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What about a Muffin. They're like a large cupcake.

    Kyana Winter
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Mini cupcakes?! As in the mini version of regular cupcakes?! Which is already a mini version of cake? Honestly where does it end with you people!"

    CD Mills
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did he ever get an answer?

    Fact Perils
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think cakes usually have layers so if it doesn’t it’s a huge cupcake

    Kylo Wren (Wren St. Germain)
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A cupcake is just a cake that can fit in a cup. Anything bigger than that (aka cannot fit in a cup) is a cake. XD

    Irene McIver
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've actually seen a "giant cupcake" in a shop, which is like a full-sized cake but in the shape of a cupcake. I guess giants have bigger cups than I do.

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    mph seti
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think it's hilarious that a lot of people who made fun of D&D geeks back in school play fantasy sports leagues now. It's the same thing, but much more boring. No wizards, no dragons, no magic swords, etc.

    b l a n c
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    exactly. all jocks that make fun of smart people or those with glasses as being nerds are actually nerds themselves- just sports ones

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    earringnut
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would play fantasy football if they added them.

    Randy Klefbeck
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is there such a thing as fantasy hockey? Also too bad instead of magic; the QB, or centers in other fantasy sports don't have something like radar to complete passing games, or rocket bursts for runner/forwards, or force fields for linemen, defense men. The powers could vary depending on what kind of sports drinks you buy and have on the bench.

    Demongrrrrl
    Community Member
    Premium
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fantasy Basketball would, if such a thing existed.

    Bellatrix Lestrange
    Community Member
    5 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Blood = Bad🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 Downvote now⬇ ⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇

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    I'm not a Robot
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'll go with -Things I Say When I'm Stoned - for $500 , Alex.

    Thomas Ewing
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Earth is tilting off its axis!

    Arctic Fox Lover
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I guess I'll never know what an actual froot tastes like. Froot Loops are only froot FLAVORED loops.

    Ambie Bambie
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought they all tasted the same 🤦

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    Sarah Stalder
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's some serious derp going on there.

    Christina Collins
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think he messed up his nail polish. Manicures are expensive!

    Party Poison
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    lol i make the exact same face, all the time, for no reason

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    Beli Keshini
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Merry Christmas to ME from ALL OF YOU" - hahaha!

    Mme de Poppadom
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What ranking did "Macaulay McCaulyface" come in?

    J-A Laine
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Schizophrenic: "Merry Christmas to YOU from ALL OF ME"

    CatMan
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honestly should've been kevin

    Randy Klefbeck
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Weather is here, wish you were beautiful.

    Marvin HoG
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ALWAYS let the internet name stuff

    Disgusting Sehun
    Community Member
    5 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    i didnt give it another point because its the laws of pewdiepie

    #29

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    Vytas Navickas
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    a cross between "Home Alone" and "A Christmas Story" and a rip off of both!

    #30

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    Christina Collins
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think you have a case for employment discrimination. Bastarts!

    Jen Gearhart
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh yeah.... I see how it is.... Try and use logic to make up for it

    #31

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    Malakai
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    THANK YOU. As a wise waitress once told me, cheesecake doesn't need a friend

    Cuddles
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes it does...it needs to come hang out in my belly and socialize with me. I will be it's friend. LOL

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    Alex Bailey
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Works a bit easier in the UK where we call them chips! Chips of potato which can be oven baked chips, pan-fried chips, triple-fried chips, microwaved chips... Crisps being the term used for the packets of thin-sliced crispy potato snacks because, well, they ARE crisp!

    Lousha
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, in my original language we totally have "plastic wooden spoon" :)

    Carrie Laughs
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love anomalies like that - what's the language?

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    troufaki13
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    True. Oven-baked fries sounds a bit weird

    Lana Jig-maker
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    yeah, but "bakes" doesn't roll off the tongue now does it?

    Lorraine R
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But "crispsspss" is too hard to say.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "french bakes" just doesn't sound right....

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    Tiny flame
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I liked how he used panic! at the Disco as an example

    #37

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    CiscoZulfikar
    Community Member
    5 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now we need another cameo of Macaulay Culkin with Mark Rober

    Jaded Queen
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They done that. Long ago. Also mark robber promotes something as honeybee which steels people's info. He may be intelligent but he is also an a*****e

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    Little Dino
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    omg, I love watching Mark Rober and they worked together very well! :)

    #38

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    Lana Jig-maker
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    the reverse is true too. Humans, we are never happy.

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    Miruku_Spilt
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Very funny, I saw 3 shooting stars a few days ago, and I was told that I'm "hallucinating". Fun fact: it was the middle of the night.

    Jessica
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i see them all the time....but i live in a town where the light of the moon is brighter then the city lights

    #43

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    Chutney Hawkes
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's no more Ninja movies because a bunch of wining tuckfards will accuse the producers of cultural appropriation.

    Courtney Christelle
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think we've hit that point with the Fast/Furious movies.

    Pepper Pots
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LOL come to think of it I dont see any ninja movies

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    Cuddles
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, there is one called "Angels with Dirty Faces". (Which is actually the move title being parodied in Home Alone. It's a pretty good film noir crime movie with Humphrey Bogart and James Cagney in it.)

    #46

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    Rebekah Tracy
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you want to build yourself a gladiator ring, that sounds AWESOME!!!! FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS MACAULAY!!!

    #47

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    PhantomBuni
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Except they don’t pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for a suit.

    Thunder
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Heh never went to prom... I live in a windmill and eat tulips and cheese

    PhantomBuni
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    James Bond doesn’t wear dresses

    Catlady6000
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Bond girls do. You...you do know there other characters...don't you?

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    Sandra Luz
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Whoah, you're evil! And I loved it. 😈

    Anna roberts
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Went and I am sure I would have TONS of regret... if I could remember it LOL

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    troufaki13
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's because you can't gracefully fart. You have to let it go fully and freely to really enjoy the satisfaction of utter relief

    Bender Bending Rodríguez
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LMAO... This is so true, I want to upvote this more than once.

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    SandraG
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’ve always wondered why!

    #49

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    JessG
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pure accident while running away from the saber-toothed tiger

    Catlady6000
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I always wonder this about the coffee where the beans pass through the digestive system of a cat. Why?

    #50

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    Chutney Hawkes
    Community Member
    5 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Credit cards can be used to spread butter... and legs.

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    #53

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    Kiss Army
    Community Member
    Premium
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew a guy named Richard D**k... we called him Double D**k. I think his parents must have hated him...

    Sarah Smith
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew a Richard C*x who eventually joined the navy. Thusly becoming Seaman D**k C*x.

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    Thunder
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    D**k is a normal Dutch name. And why are words like s**t and d**k being censored? I mean, with f*ck and c*nt I get it

    Catlady6000
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Checked an I.d for a Peter Richard Johnson

    Cathelijne van Weelden
    Community Member
    5 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Since when does Richard stand for D**k?! 🤔 What did I miss???

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    Wolfblood Fanatic
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    THEY. ARE. THE. WORST. Don't lie, we all eat pop tarts because the frosting looks appetising! NOW THEY ARE JUST HAVING HORRIBLE QUANTITY CONTROL!

    Mike Beck
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm afraid I'm one of the chosen few that prefers unfrosted.

    Carrie Laughs
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've never even eaten a pop tart! 😲😲😲

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    markthomasc
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you bathe unfrosted pop tarts in butter when they are still hot from the toaster then they taste like pie and are amazing! They used to have an apple pop tart that was awesome but sugar cinnamon with butter is life changing.

    Gina Babe
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I actually prefer them because the others are too sweet

    #55

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    Anna roberts
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, not a good idea. Why do you think the police came up with the battering ram?

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    MrTree1779
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The actor playing crackhead-priest (named "Matthew Mara") is David Hornsby, the cousin of musician Bruce Hornsby , husband of Emily Deschanel, and brother-in-law of Zooey Deschanel. -- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Hornsby

    Anna roberts
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never realized how many people stole your looks... I knew they were gone, but...

    #59

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    Nico Di Angelo
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I actually really like candy corn.

    JessG
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fun fact: it's butterscotch flavor

    Lorraine R
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are different types of candy corn and the only one that's any good is Brach's, which has a distinct honey flavor.

    Ashley Harrold
    Community Member
    5 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Yes! Death to the disgusting corn!

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    Wolfblood Fanatic
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imma do that when I'm older. Even if it's a boy.

    Thunder
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh that’s a cousin from my girlfriend.

    PhantomBuni
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe Gomorrah, the city that was destroyed like Sodom. That’ll serve as a good sign to the little gremlins who cut the line for the slide

    #61

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    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, keep stuffing until you burst, Mr. Culkin :)

    #62

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    Christian Didonna
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    a joke apple a day keeps the bad jokes away.

    Nothanks L. Walk
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think the reverse would be funnier. Someone expecting the SPLORSH of a tomato to the face, instead getting the THUD of an apple would be bloody hilarious.

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