We crave more than sunshine, warmth, and good company in the Fall. Everyone needs a good dose of humor to keep away the Autumn blues as well. And we’ve got a great collection that will make you chuckle all ready and waiting for you.
We’ve collected, concocted, and collated some of the very best examples of funny tweets posted by women. Grab a mug of hot cocoa or mulled wine, get comfortable on the couch, grab your cat or doggo for some company, and start scrolling. Upvote your fave tweets and share this list with anyone who desperately needs to unwind.
You can read Bored Panda’s previous posts about hilarious tweets by women that made everyone crack up right here, here, here, aaaaand here.
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Bored Panda spoke with Sophia Armen, one of the women who posted extremely viral tweets. In her post, she compared EU leaders sitting around a round table to hummus and got nearly half a million likes.
“I love hummus and it is always on my mind. I couldn’t help it,” Armen explained what inspired her to make the joke. “The image even had the parsley garnish! People around the world expressed they also saw hummus. And once they saw it, that they “couldn’t unsee it.” That is how I felt as well.”
“The tweet got a lot of love from users in the Middle East. I was happy that a tweet spread a little joy,” she said. “As a woman social media can be a scary place, especially when you are outspoken and community-committed. This tweet was a moment of joy that showed universal love of hummus. Just made me smile and laugh.”
No-one thinks that excuse is worth anything anyway.
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in my country we have a joke quite simmiliar to this... Man just woke up, and find a letter for his wife, where was said that she must go to shopping to buy some new things, and that she alrealy cleaned up all the mess, an also talk to his dughter and she will be ok, and she loves him... he dont understand so he go to the kitchen, where was his little son, eating breakfast. He asked him what happened. So his son told him, he came back really drunk, he smashed things around, and try hit on is 18y old daughter, so she must run to he room and lock herself... Man cant believe what hapened, so he ask his son "So, why your mum leave this letter where she wrote down that she loves me." and son responded"Oh yeah that... well when she managed to grab you, get you in the bedroom and try to undress you, you yell at her: Hands off lady! Im happy married!"
yeah - that story is old but makes no sense that he'd hit on his 18 year old daughter if he's going 'hands off lady...'
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So even when he's drunk he's loyal. At least give him props for that!
Wait until he thinks the closet is the bathroom when he's that drunk!
What are you crying about? Now you know, no matter how drunk he is and how cute SHE is, he won't cheat! That's a keeper, girlfriend. Marry that boy!
true story; My wife and I went out and I got very drunk. We got home and I passed out on the bed clothed. She attempted to take off my shoes, and pants and I yelled; STOP! I'm married. :)
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In advanced senility my mother used to say "I don't know whose house this is, but I guess it's nice!" It was her house, of course.
If he didn't have a breakfast with aspirin on side waiting in the morning, she doesn't deserve him.
May be he is talking about another girlfriend and you are his sidekick
If you're considering doing that just ask him or break up with him. Once you start sneaking around it'll never be the same!!
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I doubt this. Reminds me too much of a similar story that went viral years ago. Husband threw up in a vase in the entry way when coming home smashed, and when the wife came to have words with him he said "Hey lady, hands off. I'm married." It ends with the wife apparently making a really nice breakfast the next day.
Honestly surprised that this isn't a more common sentiment!
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The relationship between humor, stand-up comedy, and gender is seen as innately ‘sexist’ by some. Being a stand-up comedian was, until recently, seen as a profession ‘meant’ almost exclusively for men due to how much ‘aggression’ it requires. However, this has partly changed in recent years. Female comedians are becoming more and more prolific, even though not everyone accepts them. A large portion of female stand-up comedians use humor as a platform to declare their political beliefs and promote feminism.
Humor is known to have positive side-effects. According to one study, laughter helps reduce blood pressure. While another one shows that laughing helps reduce anxiety, as well as other negative emotions. In other words, if you’re laughing, you most likely won’t be crying anytime soon.
What’s more, laughter can boost your immune system, improve blood circulation, calm down stress hormones, and even relieve pain! When you look at it this way, there’s barely anything that humor can’t help fix. Of course, it’s no substitute for exercise, a good diet, getting plenty of sleep, and doctor-approved medication or therapy if you need it, but laughter can give a big boost to your mood and your energy levels.
Fared better than me. I accidentally kicked the couch and my toe bone split in two. I was on crutches for 6 weeks.
...this is why I have no kids, 3 cats, and captain crunch for dinner last night.
I desperately want to claim that's a lie ... but it's true! I do have a favorite stovetop burner! I'm too much of an adult ...
And after 8 hours in open office, I kinda want to be alone for month.
Because you my darling are shining diamond of nonsense and something better is waiting for you
Well... nope. It's about a person's traits not what sex they are. My husband carries a BACKPACK - daily. With multitool, a bottle of water, hand sanitizer, water filter, rain jacket, a knife, and some energy bars... so am I. So either we are both preppers for zombie apocalypse... or just very smart people.
That happen to my brother this past summer. His daughter said look daddy they fit me now.
loool, I laugh so hrd that my cat sleeping next to me woke up, growl at me and leave :D
I mean switching your letters around isn't dangerous until you try to pronounce it and accidentally summon a demon...
I'm the opposite. I don't work out, sit at a desk all day, and I'd still happily sleep 10+ hours a night 7 days a week.
Maybe if the service industry wasn't rigged against the wait staff. When most of their wages come from tips.
What is SMH? I keep coming across these in posts what the hell? It's like another language, man I'm not going to sit around for five mins trying to figure out what words start with smh just type that s**t out. Some Monkey Hype? Is that it? Someone Moo's Hello? Smoke Marijuana Hookahs? Yep, that must be the one. ( I totally sat around for five mins trying to figure it out) damn it!
This may seem like a bad bf but if my husband, who can not always say in words what he wants to say, went to google search for something that describes his feelings it wouldn't mean less to me. I think this is sweet :)
Actually this is brilliant -- finding out what's really in this stuff that you put on your skin all the time.
Well, you do have a hunter, a trapper and a fisher, so you're all set for Robinson's island.
It came out in 1998, twenty-one years ago. For a cartoon that's super old.
Maybe not wear a dress with a personal space device attached to it, so other people can be in the picture and not stand on it?
I once got a message like that at 3am from a guy I hadn't talked to in almost 3 years.
I have NEVER heard a guy say "do you want to do your skincare routine in my bathroom?" If i am staying at a boys place you best believe half my make up wil end up smeared on the pillowcase and I will wake up looking like death...
I'm also really tired of these gendered posts from Bored Panda. The fact that women are funny is not news worthy or surprising because PEOPLE are funny. Enough with the "Women being funny" and "Dads being parents" posts.
I’m with you, Ivy. I think we are seeing a surge in “posts” like this because: a) it requires very little to no research b) it’s going to bring in a lot of traffic and get people to post, debate, and complain c) it’s an easy post that can instantly be repurposed on other listicle websites. Frankly, I just find posts like this boring.
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These are funny, but why does the gender of the person who posted them matter?
Because men and women are different and they have different life experiences.
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"xzy Times [Gender] Shared Their Thoughts On Twitter And Made People Crack Up". Gender = Women: "Hey, great to see these posting!" Gender = Men: "Why mention it comes from men you patriachist sexist swine?" Whz not just say "funny tweets"?
Interesting take, but the top two posts on this are saying exactly what you predicted would be said for men, and they have ~30 upvotes each. In actuality we are all tired of this gendered nonsense, non-TERF feminists included.
Load More Replies... I just like a laugh and don’t care if it women, men or children.
hey bored panda this was funny but maybe some more original content would be great, thanks!
Well, it's 4 years later and things have changed a lot. I see people here making arguments making arguments about how gender isn't important that people rarely dare to make on this site now.
There is nothing wrong with saying " Funny tweets by women ". Men and women have different life experiences.
Karen Kilgareth is one of the hosts of the podcast My Favorite Murder.
I'm also really tired of these gendered posts from Bored Panda. The fact that women are funny is not news worthy or surprising because PEOPLE are funny. Enough with the "Women being funny" and "Dads being parents" posts.
I’m with you, Ivy. I think we are seeing a surge in “posts” like this because: a) it requires very little to no research b) it’s going to bring in a lot of traffic and get people to post, debate, and complain c) it’s an easy post that can instantly be repurposed on other listicle websites. Frankly, I just find posts like this boring.
Load More Replies... These are funny, but why does the gender of the person who posted them matter?
Because men and women are different and they have different life experiences.
Load More Replies... "xzy Times [Gender] Shared Their Thoughts On Twitter And Made People Crack Up". Gender = Women: "Hey, great to see these posting!" Gender = Men: "Why mention it comes from men you patriachist sexist swine?" Whz not just say "funny tweets"?
Interesting take, but the top two posts on this are saying exactly what you predicted would be said for men, and they have ~30 upvotes each. In actuality we are all tired of this gendered nonsense, non-TERF feminists included.
Load More Replies... I just like a laugh and don’t care if it women, men or children.
hey bored panda this was funny but maybe some more original content would be great, thanks!
Well, it's 4 years later and things have changed a lot. I see people here making arguments making arguments about how gender isn't important that people rarely dare to make on this site now.
There is nothing wrong with saying " Funny tweets by women ". Men and women have different life experiences.
Karen Kilgareth is one of the hosts of the podcast My Favorite Murder.
