The dreaded ex. Most of us have got them. There are millions of occasions when the situation is resolved with an amicable, mature ceasefire that can even blossom into a beautiful friendship. Sadly, there are just as many occasions when the asshole can frankly just drop dead for all you care, together with his savage text fails.

In these times of instant messaging and easy contact at the touch of your fingertips, it can be just too tempting for the eschewed ex to reach out and test the waters. An uncalculated text from your ex can end up causing an explosion of emotions with WW III proportions. Bored Panda had compiled a list of times when people came up with the perfect response to these unwanted advances, some of them are just deliciously devilish and undoubtedly funny texts.

Scroll down to check out the list of ex-texts and funny messages, and may the force be with you while dealing with your senseless ex.

#1

Worse Than A B*tch

Worse Than A B*tch

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coffee zombie
Community Member
3 years ago

That moment when you realise you dated a douchebag

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#2

Hard Pass

Hard Pass

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ADHORTATOR
Community Member
3 years ago

That's a classic

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#3

Slowly Suffocating

Slowly Suffocating

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WhiteFox
Community Member
3 years ago

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH THAT WAS SO PERFECT 👌

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#4

Dealing With Your Ex

Dealing With Your Ex

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CatShatBrix
Community Member
3 years ago

Ooh! Hahaha

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#5

Lesson Learned

Lesson Learned

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CatShatBrix
Community Member
3 years ago

Classic, but never gets old.

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#6

Text Form Ex

Text Form Ex

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ADHORTATOR
Community Member
3 years ago

clear message...

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#7

Savage Burn

Savage Burn

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Kjorn
Community Member
3 years ago

traduction: i date other people for one year and now that i'm single again, i can't stand it. So i texting you again so we can got back together.

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#8

Moving On

Moving On

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mulk
Community Member
3 years ago

BAM, headshot!

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#9

It Reminds Me Of You

It Reminds Me Of You

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Neeraj Jha
Community Member
3 years ago

If it's not much of a bothering, I would like to have that Pizza Place's number.

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#10

A Real Nightmare

A Real Nightmare

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Misterscooter
Community Member
3 years ago

Well played.

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#11

Sleeping Like A Baby

Sleeping Like A Baby

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Krista Leary
Community Member
3 years ago

This is too perfect.

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#12

Awesome Burn

Awesome Burn

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thibault bernier
Community Member
3 years ago

cliché*

Rogue Hater
Community Member
3 years ago

Was that the only typo you could see?

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Mark Tidd
Community Member
3 years ago

the fact that they couldn't spell simple words, yet called the other a cliché says it all.

Ginette Rochon
Community Member
3 years ago

Touché......ouch!!!!!

Ann Ros'a
Community Member
3 years ago

I was gonna say that! Touché to you!!

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Santino Aznar
Community Member
3 years ago

Can someone translate what he said? Can't understand a thing

Hikari
Community Member
3 years ago

"You're a f****** cliché. Name your kids dumb s*** and work in a tattoo parlor and mediate with crystals. Smoke weed. You'll never grow up.

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Jeon Y/N
Community Member
4 months ago

Your* cliché* you’ll* I think everyone at least deserves someone with proper grammar 😭

Robert Carlton
Community Member
3 months ago

*you're

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C H
Community Member
2 months ago

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Mr Morgan
Community Member
3 months ago

You can email Dr Omar via (dromarsolutionhome@gmail.com) to get your Ex husband back after divorce or breakup. Dr Omar also help maintain a lovely and sweet relationship and make your spouse, lover, Ex wife/husband to love and come back.

Lucy Heartfilia
Community Member
7 months ago

OOOOOO

Princess Unicorn19899
Community Member
1 year ago

yes, so savage dude

Princess Unicorn19899
Community Member
1 year ago

says the person who can't even spell a single word right

Lauren Tanner
Community Member
3 years ago

?

Amy Hickman
Community Member
3 years ago

What a nasty pasty!

Bettina Jansen
Community Member
3 years ago

lol, had to read the first text twice to get it :D

Allana Rose
Community Member
3 years ago

Yeah I had a hard time figuring out what he was saying too. Someone needs to grow up and it isnt her!

Debbie Sweeney
Community Member
3 years ago

??cleeshay??? Moron much?

Maria Steenlage
Community Member
3 years ago

Really really good!

Miss-Minecraft- Girl;D
Community Member
3 years ago

😹🤣😆

Kris Tine
Community Member
3 years ago

dumb...

Nina Wum
Community Member
3 years ago

Sick burn.

The Cube Cat
Community Member
3 years ago

This needs more upvotes

Amy Elliott-Swift
Community Member
3 years ago

Touche

Susan Gardner
Community Member
3 years ago

Touche

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#13

Just Nope

Just Nope

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ADHORTATOR
Community Member
3 years ago

He asked politely...

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#14

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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Lucida
Community Member
3 years ago

" My mom is so excited for me" Bahaha

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#15

Growing Up

Growing Up

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KK
Community Member
3 years ago

i would of said "neither are we"

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#16

Savage Burn

Savage Burn

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WhiteFox
Community Member
3 years ago

hehe

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#17

Wait, There Were Feelings?

Wait, There Were Feelings?

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Sop Hie
Community Member
3 years ago

*snork*

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#18

You Just Have To Visit It

You Just Have To Visit It

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Šu Ma
Community Member
3 years ago

burn!

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#19

No Second Chance Here

No Second Chance Here

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Charlotte
Community Member
3 years ago

Those hearts though. Makes be wanna throw up.

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#20

Cheating Accidentally

Cheating Accidentally

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Virgil Blue
Community Member
3 years ago

Accident? Like "I tripped and fell and accidentally poked my dong into her. Then I had to move around vigorously to escape." Just replace some words if the other one cheated.

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#21

As Far Away As The Sun

As Far Away As The Sun

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Derpicorn
Community Member
3 years ago

(Sun)burn

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#22

Fact Check

Fact Check

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Lucida
Community Member
3 years ago

My husbands ex did that when he and I started dating. She: "Oh, I love your beautiful big blue eyes" Him: "My eyes are green..." Hahaha! Stupid girl!

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#23

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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Jesse Watts
Community Member
3 years ago

That’s awesome

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#24

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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WhiteFox
Community Member
3 years ago

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH

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#25

Thanks For Ruining It

Thanks For Ruining It

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Jason
Community Member
3 years ago

HAHAHAHA

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#26

Hi And Bye

Hi And Bye

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CatShatBrix
Community Member
3 years ago

Simple, but effective.

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#27

New Phone, Who Dis?

New Phone, Who Dis?

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CelSlade
Community Member
3 years ago

XD

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#28

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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Boring Panda
Community Member
3 years ago

I Relate

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#29

All Things Come To An End

All Things Come To An End

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Enomfon Asuquo
Community Member
3 years ago

The Spice Girls will ALWAYS be forever

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#30

Hard Pass

Hard Pass

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Shiva Dheva
Community Member
3 years ago

This is a real BUUUURN. 🔥🔥🔥

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#31

Feelings For You

Feelings For You

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CelSlade
Community Member
3 years ago

What an arrogant arsehole!

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#32

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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Elizabeth Molloy
Community Member
3 years ago

BUUUURN!

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#33

Bad Taste And Low Standards

Bad Taste And Low Standards

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Joe Dad
Community Member
3 years ago

Ohhhhhh

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#34

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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sh
Community Member
3 years ago

Isn't pizza everyone's thing? Almost like saying, "I heard someone say oxygen today; made me think of the air we used to breathe together."

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#35

Keep On Keeping On

Keep On Keeping On

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That Fat Mouse
Community Member
3 years ago

BURN!

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#36

Savage Tease

Savage Tease

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Saurabh Nagar
Community Member
3 years ago

savage

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#37

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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nanashi
Community Member
3 years ago

this is a good one but almost too obviously fake.

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#38

What's Up

What's Up

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WhiteFox
Community Member
3 years ago

2v1

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#39

A Huge Waste Of Time

A Huge Waste Of Time

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Misterscooter
Community Member
3 years ago

At least he gets it.

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#40

Punch In The Face

Punch In The Face

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Echo
Community Member
3 years ago

Jeez the down votes are kind of harsh on this reply. You just assume he is a looser I guess?

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#41

Hodor

Hodor

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San
Community Member
3 years ago

Maybe "Hodor" was the pass!

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#42

Thanks, But No Thanks

Thanks, But No Thanks

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Misterscooter
Community Member
3 years ago

Truth!

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#43

Trash Day

Trash Day

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CatShatBrix
Community Member
3 years ago

Ex-charming?

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#44

Setting It On Fire

Setting It On Fire

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Christina Waide
Community Member
3 years ago

At least it will be easier to pack. :)

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#45

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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Santino Aznar
Community Member
3 years ago

Hahah!

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#46

Truly Inappropriate

Truly Inappropriate

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Zenozenobee
Community Member
3 years ago

Cheating is always inappropriate.

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#47

But I Still Love You

But I Still Love You

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Mama Panda
Community Member
3 years ago

hahahahahahaha

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#48

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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mocochang
Community Member
3 years ago

hmm... if it's theirs, you should still return their stuff though...

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#49

Just Nope

Just Nope

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Charlie Jallans-Daly
Community Member
3 years ago

lmao :)

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#50

A Lousy Essay

A Lousy Essay

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Valentina Lattante
Community Member
3 years ago

but you should see how he looks at Beyocé! ;)

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#51

Had A Snack, Too

Had A Snack, Too

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Katie Dragneel
Community Member
3 years ago

Totally normal.

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#52

How High Are You

How High Are You

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HarleyQuinn
Community Member
3 weeks ago

F**k you lungs with smog

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#53

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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Stephan Hoppe
Community Member
3 years ago

Out of your ass what?!

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#54

Hint Hint

Hint Hint

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WhiteFox
Community Member
3 years ago

hint hint that ring is going to make you get your finger amputated

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#55

Well, Can We?

Well, Can We?

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Rebekah
Community Member
3 years ago

Priorities.

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#56

The Thing I Miss

The Thing I Miss

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NoAssumed Name
Community Member
3 years ago

Wow... savage

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#57

Eggplant Emoji

Eggplant Emoji

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coffee zombie
Community Member
3 years ago

I had mine saved as a poop emoji

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#58

It's Your Wedding Day

It's Your Wedding Day

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John Davis Jr.
Community Member
3 years ago

what a dick!

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#59

Text From Ex

Text From Ex

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MrGosslet
Community Member
3 years ago

You're *

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#60

Ghostbusters!

Ghostbusters!

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WhiteFox
Community Member
3 years ago

😎

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#61

Not Keeping Tabs Here

Not Keeping Tabs Here

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Kiahna
Community Member
3 years ago

At least he knew what he owed you?

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#62

That's Not A Possibility

That's Not A Possibility

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Jenn
Community Member
3 years ago

REALLY??!?!?!

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#63

As Far As I Can

As Far As I Can

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Jordy Star
Community Member
3 years ago

savage

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#64

Group Chat

Group Chat

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coffee zombie
Community Member
3 years ago

Gemma noooo!

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#65

My Eyes Are Burning

My Eyes Are Burning