The dreaded ex. Most of us have got them. There are millions of occasions when the situation is resolved with an amicable, mature ceasefire that can even blossom into a beautiful friendship. Sadly, there are just as many occasions when the asshole can frankly just drop dead for all you care, together with his savage text fails.

In these times of instant messaging and easy contact at the touch of your fingertips, it can be just too tempting for the eschewed ex to reach out and test the waters. An uncalculated text from your ex can end up causing an explosion of emotions with WW III proportions. Bored Panda had compiled a list of times when people came up with the perfect response to these unwanted advances, some of them are just deliciously devilish and undoubtedly funny texts.

Scroll down to check out the list of ex-texts and funny messages, and may the force be with you while dealing with your senseless ex.

#1

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coffee zombie 2 years ago

That moment when you realise you dated a douchebag

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#2

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ADHORTATOR 2 years ago

That's a classic

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#3

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WhiteFox 2 years ago

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH THAT WAS SO PERFECT 👌

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#4

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CatShatBrix 2 years ago

Ooh! Hahaha

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#5

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CatShatBrix 2 years ago

Classic, but never gets old.

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#6

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ADHORTATOR 2 years ago

clear message...

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#7

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Kjorn 2 years ago

traduction: i date other people for one year and now that i'm single again, i can't stand it. So i texting you again so we can got back together.

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#8

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mulk 2 years ago

BAM, headshot!

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#9

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Neeraj Jha 2 years ago

If it's not much of a bothering, I would like to have that Pizza Place's number.

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#10

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Misterscooter 2 years ago

Well played.

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#11

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Krista Leary 2 years ago

This is too perfect.

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#12

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#13

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ADHORTATOR 2 years ago

He asked politely...

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#14

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Lucida 2 years ago

" My mom is so excited for me" Bahaha

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#15

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KK 2 years ago

i would of said "neither are we"

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#16

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WhiteFox 2 years ago

hehe

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#17

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Sop Hie 2 years ago

*snork*

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#18

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Šu Ma 2 years ago

burn!

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#19

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Charlotte 2 years ago

Those hearts though. Makes be wanna throw up.

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#20

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Virgil Blue 2 years ago

Accident? Like "I tripped and fell and accidentally poked my dong into her. Then I had to move around vigorously to escape." Just replace some words if the other one cheated.

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#21

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Derpicorn 2 years ago

(Sun)burn

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#22

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Lucida 2 years ago

My husbands ex did that when he and I started dating. She: "Oh, I love your beautiful big blue eyes" Him: "My eyes are green..." Hahaha! Stupid girl!

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#23

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Jesse Watts 2 years ago

That’s awesome

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#24

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WhiteFox 2 years ago

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH

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#25

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Jason 2 years ago

HAHAHAHA

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#26

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CatShatBrix 2 years ago

Simple, but effective.

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#27

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CelSlade 2 years ago

XD

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#28

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Boring Panda 2 years ago

I Relate

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#29

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Enomfon Asuquo 2 years ago

The Spice Girls will ALWAYS be forever

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#30

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Shiva Dheva 2 years ago

This is a real BUUUURN. 🔥🔥🔥

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#31

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CelSlade 2 years ago

What an arrogant arsehole!

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#32

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Elizabeth Molloy 2 years ago

BUUUURN!

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#33

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Joe Dad 2 years ago

Ohhhhhh

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#34

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sh 2 years ago

Isn't pizza everyone's thing? Almost like saying, "I heard someone say oxygen today; made me think of the air we used to breathe together."

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#35

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That Fat Mouse 1 year ago

BURN!

#36

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Saurabh Nagar 2 years ago

savage

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#37

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nanashi 2 years ago

this is a good one but almost too obviously fake.

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#38

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WhiteFox 2 years ago

2v1

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#39

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Misterscooter 2 years ago

At least he gets it.

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#40

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Echo 2 years ago

Jeez the down votes are kind of harsh on this reply. You just assume he is a looser I guess?

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#41

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San 2 years ago

Maybe "Hodor" was the pass!

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#42

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Misterscooter 2 years ago

Truth!

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#43

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CatShatBrix 2 years ago

Ex-charming?

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#44

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Christina Waide 2 years ago

At least it will be easier to pack. :)

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#45

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Santino Aznar 2 years ago

Hahah!

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#46

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Zenozenobee 2 years ago

Cheating is always inappropriate.

#47

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Mama Panda 2 years ago

hahahahahahaha

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#48

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mocochang 2 years ago

hmm... if it's theirs, you should still return their stuff though...

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#49

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Charlie Jallans-Daly 2 years ago

lmao :)

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#50

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Valentina Lattante 2 years ago

but you should see how he looks at Beyocé! ;)

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#51

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Katie Dragneel 2 years ago

Totally normal.

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#52

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Anita Holleufer 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

They just insulted them selves!

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#53

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Stephan Hoppe 2 years ago

Out of your ass what?!

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#54

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WhiteFox 2 years ago

hint hint that ring is going to make you get your finger amputated

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#55

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Rebekah 2 years ago

Priorities.

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#56

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NoAssumed Name 2 years ago

Wow... savage

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#57

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coffee zombie 2 years ago

I had mine saved as a poop emoji

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#58

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John Davis Jr. 2 years ago

what a dick!

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#59

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MrGosslet 2 years ago

You're *

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#60

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WhiteFox 2 years ago

😎

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#61

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Kiahna 2 years ago

At least he knew what he owed you?

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#62

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Jenn 2 years ago

REALLY??!?!?!

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#63

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Jordy Star 2 years ago

savage

#65

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Ok Ha-Neul 2 years ago

touchy aren't we

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#66

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Maria Tag 2 years ago

This is really funny!

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#67

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Jose Ramon 2 years ago

scumbag

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#68

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Heidi K Haskell 2 years ago

realize with a z is standard US spelling.

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#69

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Michèle Gyselinck 2 years ago

Or not is what I think too.

#70

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That Fat Mouse 1 year ago

Why would he/she be asking for a ring size, if they are broken up? Just asking.

#71

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CelSlade 2 years ago

Cold... practically icy :P

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#72

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Zenozenobee 2 years ago

"Oh, baby, give me one more chance To show you that I love you Won't you please let me Back in your heart...."

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#73

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Michèle Gyselinck 2 years ago

Teehee!

#74

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Santino Aznar 2 years ago

Why would you dirty those bowls and dishes? How can you bring yourself to do that? That's just nasty!

#76

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Pi... 2 years ago

This was a semi-genuine attempt at getting her back... well played.

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#77

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Neb 2 years ago

I would understand if that was sunglasses, but this would be unacceptable (unless they only want to threaten a bit). Yet knowing some of the eyeglasses prices... nop, a bad idea

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#78

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Krusty Shakelford 2 years ago

I'm sick of people demanding their 'time' back. You made the choice to spend time with someone. You get what you pay for. No refunds.

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#79

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Martin 2 years ago

How is this a break-up?

#80

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