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Most of us know how incredibly important it is to live next to people who we like (or at least tolerate). When you get along with your neighbors, things are great. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true! A truly bad neighbor—likely from the 5th circle of hell—can make you miserable. And you should see how poorly they communicate…

Our team here at Bored Panda has curated a list of images showing what kinds of messages and notes some awful neighbors have actually sent. Some of them are relatable, and others might make you laugh through tears. Scroll down to see how nonsensical and frustrating things can get.

Bored Panda got in touch with social psychologist Alison Jane Martingano, Ph.D., for a chat about how people can connect with the people in their neighborhood, as well as how to have empathy for problematic neighbors. Martingano is an assistant professor at the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay, the host of the 'Psychology and Stuff' podcast, and runs the 'What Do You Mean?' blog on Psychology Today. You'll find our full interview with her below.

#1

These Are Some Nice Neighbors

These Are Some Nice Neighbors

neighborsfromhell Report

#2

Hey Look At You

Hey Look At You

neighborsfromhell Report

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Ramirez rachael
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had neighbors about six years ago that had three dogs. They would just let the dogs out (off leash) and let them go wherever nature let them go, but it was in my front yard. Our kids used to play there, soccer, tag, sword, fights and you name it. my last straw was when my son came home with dog poop caked on his shoes. I used to work early morning I had to have a babysitter come to my house to watch my son at 4 AM so I could go to work at a bakery. So, on my lunch break one day I decided I’m going to gather all of the stuff I can in a bucket. (this is after I’ve asked them several times to pick it up, because our kids play there!! DUH). I waited until my next early morning shift, knowing that they slept in and it was summer, to dump the entire bucket, right outside of their car door on the drivers side. I came home for my lunch break and watched this man slip in dog poo. It was the most satisfying thing I have had in a long time. If you have an animal pick up after it.

Verena
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The question is, does the cat poop and p**s in the other garden? Because the reasoning "it's in their nature and can't keep them from it" is exactly what cat owners use. And they refuse to come pick up the poop of their cats in my garden.

María Hermida
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Cats should not be allowed to roam wildly. It's dangerous for them, they hunt and kill the wildlife, and other people don't have to put up with their pee and poo. I have four at the moment, so I clearly love them, but I understand other people may not love them so much. My cat, my rubbish.

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Kaedyn Walsh
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My god. I'm on my phone and the pic is not that big and I swear the dog looked like a HUGE tick or some kinda crawly bug and I was so confused til I enlarged the pic 🤣

whiterabbit
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A dog charges my cat on my property the owners get one warning before that dog is never seen again.

María Hermida
Community Member
8 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't harm the dog, please. It's the owners' fault, not the animal's. Report them, sue them, whatever you need to do, but don't harm the poor dog.

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SleepyBunny
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I HATE people who never care for their animals, they're living things and it's the owner's responsibility to care for them and own up when their pet does something wrong

Riley Quinn
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Kept telling my neighbor her dog was wreaking havoc in my gardens and to keep it secured. Always with the excuses, but never with the training. One day the mutt got in my yard, chased my cats, destroyed a flower bed, and I'd had it. I caught it, and took it to a shelter towns away. Screw you, lady.

María Hermida
Community Member
8 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You didn't screw the owner, you screwed the poor dog. I honestly think you are a coward and a bad person, because you've harmed the weak, innocent animal instead of facing the owners and do what you have to do. I hope karma really works and you get in your life all the sadness you caused to that poor animal.

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Terry Rex
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This one doesn't understand how dogs are or just doesn't give a s**t. They mark their territory by pissing on things

SilverSkyCloud
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

if its america id be surprised if the guy didnt just end up shooting the dog

censorshipsucks
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

this is why we have walls between our properties in SA. Otherwise several neighbours of mine would have not made it.

David
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

telling the neighbor is kinder than handing it over to animal control and they either (probably) get a fine if it is licensed or the dog might get euthanized or rehomed before they find out about it if there is no way to contact the owner.

Roxy222uk
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Honestly, the person that didn't want someone else's dog peeing in their garden has been hung by their own petard. If the absolute most important thing is not having the dog in your garden then go over to the offenders' house and speak to them in such a way that they can stop their dog doing it because they a) like you, b) aren't going to lose face by appearing to back down and c) don't feel backed into a corner. If the absolute most important thing to you is feeling superior, or showing your friends how superior you are, then crack on.

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According to Social Psychologist Martingano from the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay, most adults are “missing out” on the benefits of talking to people they don’t (yet!) know. "People miss out on these benefits for three main reasons: lack of intention (underestimating the joy of these conversations for themselves and others), lack of competence (not knowing how to hold these conversations), and lack of opportunity," she explained to Bored Panda in an email.

The host of the ‘What Do You Mean?’ blog said that people need to overcome these barriers in order to promote conversations with their neighbors. “First, individuals may not want to talk to strangers, or [they] believe strangers do not want to talk to them. People have a good sense that a conversation with a friend will be enjoyable, but with strangers, we are anxious and more likely to assume it will go badly."

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There is, however, a very positive caveat! "Research shows that people enjoy conversations with strangers more than they expect!" Martingano shared with us.

#4

At Least They All Took The Time To Discuss It And Write A Note vs. Telling Them Immediately

At Least They All Took The Time To Discuss It And Write A Note vs. Telling Them Immediately

neighborsfromhell Report

#5

My Friend Came Home To Find This Note On His Door

My Friend Came Home To Find This Note On His Door

saved_by_Singularity Report

"We also underestimate the other person's interest in conversing. Looking for things like positive body language, eye contact, and smiling can provide clues that they might want to chat," she said.

"Second, people may feel they don't have competent interpersonal skills to break the ice and start a conversation with a neighbor. We worry about being likable and appearing competent but don’t know how to create these impressions. Generally, asking questions and sharing something a bit personal can create a positive impression."

She continued: "Third, folks may simply not see the opportunities in their everyday lives to speak to someone new. We often don’t think of bumping into our neighbor in the hall as an opportunity. If we go a little slower, we may see that there are more opportunities than we think."

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#8

The Ending To This Note On The Little Library In My Neighborhood Definitely Takes A Turn

The Ending To This Note On The Little Library In My Neighborhood Definitely Takes A Turn

northcarolinee96 Report

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#9

Probably Not The Response She Was Hoping For

Probably Not The Response She Was Hoping For

neighborsfromhell Report

Bored Panda was interested in finding out how people can have more empathy for their neighbors who are known to cause them trouble. After all, at least some friction and misunderstandings are inevitable between people who live in close proximity to one another.

"To foster empathy in these situations, it's crucial to practice perspective-taking. This involves actively trying to understand the experiences, motivations, and feelings of our neighbors, especially in challenging circumstances. As I often discuss in my talks, empathy is like a muscle that requires regular exercise," Martingano said.

However, she warned that people can overwork their empathy 'muscle' or they can try to 'pick up' a weight that's too heavy for them at the moment. "In cases of friction with neighbors, you don’t want to start trying to practice empathy by discussing their opposing political views. Begin with smaller exercises. For example, ask them what they think about the new garbage collection system or school bus route. Areas of minor disagreement can be a great place to start practicing seeing things from someone else's point of view before picking up the larger dumbbells," the expert suggested.

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#10

Directionally Challenged

Directionally Challenged

neighborsfromhell Report

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TheDarkestRaven
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don’t suppose you could appologise first? Edit; BLOODY HELL ty for so many UPVOTES-

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#11

Joy-Hating Neighbor Writes Psychotic Threatening Note

Joy-Hating Neighbor Writes Psychotic Threatening Note

L0v3Ly88 Report

#12

Things You Can't Borrow: Children, Decency, Respect

Things You Can't Borrow: Children, Decency, Respect

neighborsfromhell Report

The interesting thing is that you can ‘exercise’ your empathy, even without any real people. “We can practice empathy while reading by trying to understand the feelings and motivations of fictional characters. Movies, theater, and even visual arts like the enigmatic Mona Lisa can serve as tools to enhance empathy. Think of these experiences as your empathy gym, a place where you can exercise your empathy muscles in a fictional environment, without the risk of offending anyone," Martingano told Bored Panda via email.

"Then, when you find yourself in a challenging exchange, where it's harder to discern feelings or perspectives of your neighbors, your empathy muscles will be stronger, thanks to these smaller, manageable practices."

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In an ideal world, we’d all know and like our neighbors. We’d also all probably live in such a way that there’s a good balance between privacy and being social when we want it. And we’d all be able to solve any issues that crop up because we’d be proficient in diplomacy, clear communication, active listening, and looking for compromises.

We don’t know whether you’ve noticed it or not, but we certainly do not live in an ideal world. Tension and friction can and do lead to arguments between neighbors over everything and anything: noise, rudeness, annoying behaviors, bad habits, zoning issues, etc. Far from everyone’s capable of overcoming these neighborly challenges and miscommunication with grace and calmness. The reality is that fewer people know their neighbors now than decades ago.

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Nor is everyone self-aware enough to admit that they might, in fact, be causing problems for someone else. Many people have an ego. When you bring up a problem with their behavior, they can get defensive or aggressive. Some people are so touchy that they even see friendly requests about not playing the music so bloody loud at night as a personal affront. How dare anyone not like their massive midnight parties on a work night?!

#16

Note That Got Left On My Neighbor's Car After He Parked Crooked And Hit The Car Next To Him

Note That Got Left On My Neighbor's Car After He Parked Crooked And Hit The Car Next To Him

Dapper_John Report

#18

Passive Aggression Level Up

Passive Aggression Level Up

neighborsfromhell Report

The first step to overcoming any issue with your neighbors is talking to them about the issue itself. You can leave them a friendly little note, send them a message (if you have their number or you’re connected on social media!), or chat with them the next time you see them outside. However, if it’s a more pressing problem that’s literally impacting your day-to-day life, consider walking up to their front door and asking them if you can talk for a couple of minutes.

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We all enjoy seeing justice being done. Naturally, when we confront someone who’s done us wrong, we imagine all sorts of scenarios where we come out on top and our neighbors are remorseful for their God-awful behavior. But reality is often very different from our power fantasies. The fact is that if you start off the conversation angry, judgmental, and confrontational, you’re only making things worse. 

It’s usually best to be as cool and collected as possible. Start your conversation with your neighbor in a friendly or neutral manner. Explain the situation to them. Tell them how their behavior impacts you and how it makes you feel. You should try to avoid outright blaming them for things, even if they are 100% in the wrong. Remember, your goal is to get them to stop their current behavior and become more neighborly. If they start resenting you, they might make your life hell just because they can get a rise out of you.

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#20

There Is A Dumpster That Is Illegally Taking Up A Parking Spot On My Street With A Note Saying Not To Use It

There Is A Dumpster That Is Illegally Taking Up A Parking Spot On My Street With A Note Saying Not To Use It

I’d been leaving other notes making fun of their note. Today, someone else joined in.

thehofstetter Report

Many people are perfectly reasonable. They’re willing to come to a compromise with you when they realize they’re in the wrong. But it’s essential that you take the time to actively listen to their perspective, too. Show them that you’re understanding and reasonable (so long as they’ll be the same…).

Take the time to connect with your problem neighbors… at least on a superficial level. It’s more difficult to do nasty things to people we personally know and like. Finding or creating some common ground between all of you can help you solve any future problems much more easily. And you never know, you might genuinely end up becoming cordial in the future.

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#23

But What I Do Have Are A Very Particular Set Of Skills, Skills I Have Acquired Over A Very Long Career, Skills That Make Me A Nightmare For People Like You

But What I Do Have Are A Very Particular Set Of Skills, Skills I Have Acquired Over A Very Long Career, Skills That Make Me A Nightmare For People Like You

neighborsfromhell Report

#24

Love And Parking

Love And Parking

neighborsfromhell Report

Some of us have had experiences where problematic people eventually become our friends. But you won’t get there by accident. You need to put in the effort to get to know them. That might mean taking a few minutes to talk to them in the hallway or driveway. Or it may mean that you’ll be putting in the energy to get to know them at your local events. Consider inviting them to a barbeque or neighborhood party if you’re throwing one, too. 

However, let’s not be naive. Not everyone is rational. Not everyone is reasonable. Not everyone is willing to set aside their ego and admit that they’re the jerk in a particular situation. Self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and humility take concerted effort over a long time to develop. So if your friendly chat (or two, or three!) doesn’t get through to your neighbor, it’s time to escalate things. Talk to your local council, building administrator, or neighborhood association about the problem. Ask them to mediate the conflict.

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#27

If You Want The Snacks, You’ll Get The Vax

If You Want The Snacks, You’ll Get The Vax

neighborsfromhell Report

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Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Back when Catholics couldn't eat meat on Fridays, a protestant moved into a Catholic neighborhood. Every Friday night, he'd grill a steak. After awhile, this really got to his neighbors, and they talked him into converting. At his baptism, the priest sprinkled Holy Water on his head, and said, "You were born a Protestant, you were raised a Protestant, and now you're a Catholic." Next Friday, the guy's out grilling his steak. The neighbors come over to tell him that's not allowed. The get there just in time to see the man sprinkle water on the steak and say, "You were born a steer, you were raised a steer, and now you're a fish."

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If the local organizations and administrators can’t seem to get anything done, you might need to get in touch with your local law enforcement. In these situations, it helps if you have some evidence to back your claims up. You don’t want everything to devolve into a “we said/they said” sort of deal where your neighbors will go back to their old habits the moment the officers leave. In the worst-case scenarios, you will want to talk to your lawyer about taking your neighbors to court if they are actively harming you and damaging your property.

#28

What Is Wrong With People? Open Your Own Mail

What Is Wrong With People? Open Your Own Mail

CashmirFunk Report

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Bowtechie
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's also illegal to open other people's mail... Like, felony-level illegal...

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#29

My Friend Got This Concerned Note Through Her Letterbox This Morning

My Friend Got This Concerned Note Through Her Letterbox This Morning

_River_Song_ Report

#30

Time To Unleash Some Kung Pau Vengeance

Time To Unleash Some Kung Pau Vengeance

neighborsfromhell Report

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𝓚𝓮𝓲𝓽𝓱
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They’re keeping their composure much better than I would if someone took my takeaway

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What's the strangest message or note you've ever gotten from a neighbor? Have you ever had to deal with problematic neighbors yourselves, Pandas? Feel free to share your experiences in the comments. In the meantime, for some more troublesome neighbor stories, check out Bored Panda's previous posts.

#31

A Friend Of Mine Has Received This Note From The Guy Next Door

A Friend Of Mine Has Received This Note From The Guy Next Door

imgur.com Report

#32

Neighbor Had A Note On Their Door, I Had A Follow-Up Note

Neighbor Had A Note On Their Door, I Had A Follow-Up Note

The first note says: "Hey I'm glad y'all are having s*x but if you could tone it down some and scoot your bedframe away from the wall I would appreciate it.
Thanks, your neighbor"

ZzMeSs1aHzZ Report

#33

An Invitation

An Invitation

neighborsfromhell Report

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MR
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Without more or some context, I see nothing wrong with this one. Odds are her daughter her of a sleepover and wondered why she wasn't invited and her mother fished on her behalf. Sucks for Missy, but nothing rude nor obnoxious in the inquiry.

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#35

Friend's Neighbors Have Been Keeping Her Up At Night, So She Decided To Leave Them A Note

Friend's Neighbors Have Been Keeping Her Up At Night, So She Decided To Leave Them A Note

ElloJelloMelloFello Report

#37

Note From A Neighbor And My Response - Is It Okay?

Note From A Neighbor And My Response - Is It Okay?

For the record, I was not playing music and I am alone (as usual) tonight. So I do think she had the wrong apartment. I don't know, not sure what to do.

mrhappyfriend Report

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Helena
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was living in the top floor of an apartment building. And one night I hear the sounds of loud fighting. Due to some weird acoustics in the building, it sounded like it came from above me. I was the top floor, there was no such thing as above me. The lady who lived below me heard it as well, but she had called the cops. Who promptly showed up on my doorstep thinking it was coming from my apartment. I didn't let them in because I was embarrassed I hadn't cleaned. Later learned the cops had reported to the neighbor they thought it was suspicious I didn't let them in, and were convinced it was me. I lived alone. No one was ever in there but me. It was all very weird.

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#38

My Landlord Texted Me This After He Kicked My Sweet Elderly Neighbor Out Of Our Duplex So He Could Move In

My Landlord Texted Me This After He Kicked My Sweet Elderly Neighbor Out Of Our Duplex So He Could Move In

MitziVinyl Report

#39

So I Got This Note On My Car, The Second Picture Is My Daily Parking Situation

So I Got This Note On My Car, The Second Picture Is My Daily Parking Situation

culnaej Report

#40

Asking Someone In 2021 If They Know Covid Like It’s The Muffin Man

Asking Someone In 2021 If They Know Covid Like It’s The Muffin Man

neighborsfromhell Report

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Crystal Spencer
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I mean, seriously though... if covid was in full swing, construction and all sorts of other sh!t was put in hold just like everything else in life was... get over it. We all suffered a little.

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#41

Note Left On Car Of Disabled Neighbor's Social Worker

Note Left On Car Of Disabled Neighbor's Social Worker

The_winner_man Report

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Lunaofthenest (She/they)
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Use a few more poorly drawn exclamation points!!!!!! I don't think they understand your tone well enough!!!

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#42

Snake In The Grass

Snake In The Grass

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#43

Where’s Jason Voorhees When You Need Him?

Where’s Jason Voorhees When You Need Him?

neighborsfromhell Report

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K_Tx
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

8:59 is almost midnight? I would not like the loud music either but 8:59 being almost midnight is like Tuesday being almost Friday.

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#44

A Neighbor Continues To Park In Front Of My House, Even After Leaving Them Several Polite Notes. This Is My Latest Reaction

A Neighbor Continues To Park In Front Of My House, Even After Leaving Them Several Polite Notes. This Is My Latest Reaction

victoria_antonia Report

#45

The Same Cranked Out Neighbor Who Left Us A Note Last Year About Our Other Dog Barking Left Us One Today

The Same Cranked Out Neighbor Who Left Us A Note Last Year About Our Other Dog Barking Left Us One Today

Keep in mind he lives in a shed in his mom's backyard like ten feet away from my fence. He's also the same guy who blows through the stop sign and flies around the neighborhood like he owns it. Man, I hate tweakers.

nailheadbrent Report

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MR
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Okay. But seriously. Shut your dog up. Not everyone wants to hear incessant barking. Two wrong here. None of them right.

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#46

My Neighbor Is A Charmer

My Neighbor Is A Charmer

edmundkaz Report

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Lunaofthenest (She/they)
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a gem! Really concerned about their precious phone number. Should have replied their dog barked it out in Morse code- a cry for help.

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#47

A Merry Christmas From Your Friendly Neighbor

A Merry Christmas From Your Friendly Neighbor

lolanovaro Report

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Binky Melnik
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, sure. Used only once, but really, REALLY badly by Stevie Wonder, Leona Helmsley, and the Hulk (when he wasn’t in a good mood).

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#48

Because It’s Too Much Work To Just Look Down

Because It’s Too Much Work To Just Look Down

neighborsfromhell Report

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MR
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or, you know, keep your water at your level. Kind of ridiculous to do if you have people below you. The same goes for you, you chose to move into a duplex and share space.

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#49

So It Rained Yesterday And I Got This Friendly Note Blaming My Dog For The Rain. Hung With A Command Strip With The Pull Tab Cut-Off

So It Rained Yesterday And I Got This Friendly Note Blaming My Dog For The Rain. Hung With A Command Strip With The Pull Tab Cut-Off

Probably-a-dude Report

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Lunaofthenest (She/they)
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I mean, is it really possible to mistake rainwater for dog urine? I think this has happened more than once, given the tone? Having said that, I love dogs and would probably just cover my furniture & buy the dog a fake grass patch as a goodwill gesture.

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