As confusing as the world is right now, there are not that many options but to live through it. With safety belts fastened and survival kits prepped, we’re gonna keep on rollin’ into 2020, which is like an old Klaxons song “Not Over Yet.”
So what's a better way to get your sanity deficiency cured than a dose of good humor? And not just any kind of humor. We’re talking about the new comedy genre of the year, pure gold in the mockery department, and already a cult classic—Bored Panda’s compilation of corona jokes.
The punapocalypse is back, so get your masks ready, 'cause it’s about to feel like someone turned on the laughing gas. Be sure to check out the previous parts here, here, and here. Trust me, just like wine, they even get better with time.
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This is what those people who think that everything is ok and that they don’t need to follow the governments laws need to hear!!
Load More Replies...I think debrina blackmoon is talking about Gretel S
Load More Replies...I just want to say to those people who argue that their masks make it hard to breath... There is more than 1 mask on the market that will work. It took me some time trying out different ones I bought but I have found one that works brilliantly. Until I got my mask I had only been out 6 times since March. Since I got my mask, I have gone out almost every day. I'm going to take my camera next time I go out
Which one is it,I am looking for one to hel with breathing issues.
Load More Replies...If you or your loved one fits in the description, your best legal option is to STFU.
Imagine reading the beginning as an anti-masker thinking "yes, yes, I will probably call this law firm" and then you read the end and do a double take LOL ;D
I know for a fact... because I still do the whole group project by myself. APUSH ones.
Load More Replies...Yep. I always do the projects on my 9wn. (I'm still in school)
Load More Replies...the smile at the end of your sentence is a trying-to-look-happy-but-dying-inside kinda emoji, no?
Load More Replies...Right!!! My senior capstone project, I told the other two members to just let me do it since I always make As on projects. Made an A again and they were happy.
So... you know that's not the point, right? But good for you for doing so well with grades
Load More Replies...I never asked to be in group projects. Those are just so the prof has less work grading.
That is, unfortunately, a correct assumption. I heard that from my co-workers for many years. -Dr M, retired professor (who did not assign group projects until the dean threatened him with firing)
Load More Replies...It's easy to lose hope with all the challenges that 2020 keeps throwing at us. Especially when you look at how the coronavirus has been resurfacing in some parts of the world in the past few weeks. There are now 10.5 million confirmed people who have been infected with Covid-19 worldwide; over 2.6 million of them are in the United States.
On Tuesday, June 30, more than 48k new coronavirus cases were confirmed in the US. Meanwhile, at least 36 states have cases trending upwards, some states have put a stop to easing lockdown regulations, and the number of new cases in the US has risen by 80 percent in the past 2 weeks. So it's easy to panic and to feel stressed.
However, laughter and seeing the silver lining can help psychologically and physically. And if you feel guilty about laughing during this crisis—don't. Humor helps us get through the toughest times.
Is it warm and hot and fogs up my glasses, yes. Does it help me know that I am protecting my 8 years old daughter who has me wrapped around her finger and my father in law who has had Parkinson's for over 20 years, YES.
Yes. In Spain, where I live, we all have to wear masks and I haven't heard any bitching from anyone. There are the occasional idiots here and there not wearing them (mainly teenagers), but they're a minority. On May 19, the central government passed an "order" saying that everyone must wear a mask in public spaces, shops, and public transport. We're in the middle of a heat wave (one of many yet to come...) and the only thing that really bothers me about the mask is not being able to see through my fogged up glasses, lol.
Load More Replies...I have damaged lungs. I was in a coma for a couple of months, and on a ventilator part of that time. It is difficult for me to breathe with a mask. It also causes anxiety to have a mask on. I STILL wear a mask every single time I go out, even if I sometimes have to step outside to take a break, lift the mask, and breathe for a while. Why? Because I don't want anyone else to experience months in the hospital. I know what it's like.
You should become a spokesperson for a public service TV commercial. No statistics, no theory, no experts in lab coats, just a first-person story. People connect with that.
Load More Replies...And my clothes restrict my movements, but you don't see me walking around naked. Except that one time, but we don't talk about it.
Yes, a mask makes you feel a little suffocated, and uncomfortable. I find it triggers me, and gives me anxiety attacks. I still wear one when I leave the house, because it it the responsible and ethical thing to do. Suck it up, buttercup.
Admittedly masks CAN be uncomfortable to wear, but the consequences of not wearing one can be 100 times worse
Try long and deep breathes instead of short hectic ones. It works better under the mask and, bonus, is healthier anyway because larger parts of the lungs get to work and more oxygen and CO2 are exchanged to resp. from the blood.
I wear one but have a reaction within a minute or two. I have asthma. According to the federal guidelines I don't have to wear one. Until all the "stupid special" people out there start wearing one I'll continue to wear one. It's not about religion and it's not about politics, it's about life!!
They are. They have been on the FBI watch list for years.
Load More Replies...As a mexican, I'd love to laugh at that (quite good) joke. But then I remember our president...
Load More Replies...Dear Christian. Because the caveman was not around at that time.
To all the Christians here- this was a joke for Atheists. Not for you. Its not your cake day.
Dear Christian poster. How is it you can function with only one braincell?
BTW Martha, their last brain cell shed when they tried to explain the bible.
Load More Replies...Hillarious also since various species of dinosaurs roamed the erath for about 169 million years. The genus homo is arround for at most 3 million years!
Also, some dinosaurs did survive, and are still around. We call them birds.
Load More Replies...Michelle..the question was a smart a*s question. It was meant to be an insult and when they get called out they themselves get insulted.
Load More Replies...Bored Panda previously spoke to comedy writer and comedian Ariane Sherine about whether or not it's all right to joke about the coronavirus during the pandemic.
According to her, it's "essential" to joke."Humor is a release mechanism to help us cope during dark times," she pointed out. Now that's something we should all keep in mind the next time someone tells us that we're being insensitive while laughing, don't you think, dear Pandas?
However, that's not the only plus of laughing during a crisis. Ariane told us that shared humor also helps us bond with one another. "Lockdown would be very gloomy indeed if we couldn’t laugh about our predicament!"
Makes me wonder what the extent of the overlap is there....
Load More Replies...I don't like this one, because it implies that they're the same thing - and therefore implies that if you agree businesses should be able to discriminate against antimaskers, then you agree they should be able to discriminate against gay couples. Businesses have a right to deny you service if you are causing harm to others. This is why you can't smoke in most businesses (in my country), must wear a shirt where food is served, and must wear a mask during a pandemic. However to require you live a certain lifestyle or follow their religion? No. A good breakdown: https://www.quora.com/Is-No-Shirt-No-Shoes-No-Service-a-law-or-just-a-rule-imposed-by-the-individual-business
I never thought of it that way but I totally agree with this statement
Load More Replies...I don't think the people down voting you have quite worked through the logic of your statement. As I understand it, Autism Genius is saying companies should be able to bar people without masks, but not gay couples
Load More Replies...This is an unpopular opinion, but I think that businesses should be allowed to choose whether to sell things to someone or not. If they decide not to serve a certain customer, out of personal convictions, public health concerns or whatever reason, they will only harm their own business, but in a free country, people should have the freedom to be stupid, as long as it doesn't harm others (getting inconvenienced doesn't count...). If you disagree with me on this point, I'm completely fine with that, just wanted to post one (meaningless) opinion
Thank you for this. I am what you call a 'homophobe' but their really should be another name for that. I value the person, but not their values. If i have to respect a gay person, shouldnt they have to respect me? 'We have the right to refuse business to you' shouldnt be thrown out of perspective
Load More Replies...And gay couples did not spread an infectious, highly contagious disease.
If I ask them to make a c**k shaped case and they don't want to we should lock them up!
I love that the fish holding a gun has a mustache and red hat! Hahaha!
I'm VERY scared that when the cheeto doesn't win in November, these minions with their guns and foul, name calling, bullying mouths are going to start some REAL s**t. I have a pretty good feeling...just saying. Be prepared.
So far it hasn’t been the Cheeto voters/supporters causing havoc everywhere. 20K armed civilians were in VA and no violence. They stood arm and arm with Antifa, BLM, MAGA, Dems, etc... Not a piece of litter was left on the ground either. I personally love when Progressive/Left leaning people stereotype others, while shouting that others shouldn’t do that. Very hypocritical.
Load More Replies..."I have the right to get myself sick and die because Merica!" So actually it's a blessing because it culls the stupid and weak from the herd.
Except for: not. It culls anyone that's been within six feet of the stupid or weak, also. Innocent bystanders. Children and the elderly.
Load More Replies...hm,i am glad i am not a fish i would have t stay inside my whole life
There are lots of fun ways to boost your mood if you've got the pandemic blues. Hilarious lists like this one work wonders, as do stand-up comedy shows, funny movies, and comedic books.
Comedy writer Ariane revealed that her personal favorite go-to funny movie during the lockdown is the 2004 flick 13 Going on 30. "It’s really heartwarming and the Thriller scene is hilarious. It always lifts my spirits when I’m feeling low."
What about you, dear Readers? What do you do to cheer up during these stressful times?
This is what we all get when a narcissistic psychopath gets elected president...
if he fits in oval office, he sits. this is the wrong way to elect a president.
Load More Replies...I think he's lying about getting tested. First, because he lies every day as a matter of course, but second, because the momentary nasal swab is uncomfortable, so he would just say "I don't have to!" like a 3-year-old.
I did believe it, but you make a great point. No way is this asshat letting someone shove a q-tip up his nose every f*****g day.
Load More Replies...Every person he comes into contact is tested to see if they haven't got Trumpvirus.
"I tested very positively in another sense this morning," tRump told reporters outside the White House on his way to Michigan. "I tested positively toward negative, right?" "I tested perfectly this morning," he continued. "Meaning I tested negative." "But that's a way of saying it: positively toward the negative."
You hit the nail on the head! He doesn't understand that it is supposed to be "Gov't of the people, by the people, for the people ..." NOT "for the 'President' ".
So he spends more than $3,000 dollars -which is taxpayer's money- each day to keep himself safe?
lets get someone who has it asymptomatically to go infect him...
My son (5) does that without being taught. He understands very much for his age and is such a stickler to rules.
My youngest daughter would creepily stare through the window at people walking down the street without masks during hard lockdown. One day, a passerby shouted at her "What you looking at?" and without as much as a wink she screamed back at him, "I'm watching you DIE!" My children scare me. Send help.
As a witch I'd refuse to eat such a toxic Gretal 🤮
Load More Replies...My spouse kissed me yesterday and my son yelled, "Stop! Social distancing!" And then came over and pushed us apart. He's 5, why can adults not get this concept?
Children are more intelligent! Great little guy you have there!
Load More Replies...Sounds funny, but be careful with this. Unmasked creeps have been known to deliberately cough/spit on people who question their "freedom". Don't put your kid on the front line.
Presumably they don't even care about themselves judging by the number of anti maskers who have died from it.Maybe they have a death wish and want to take as many people with them as possible. Maybe they should be looking at themselves as serial killers.
No one can see you speak with yourself, you can do train karaoke and as long you keep The mute, you can move your mouth. Save money on lipstick, can lick your lips when your crush come around. Even tell him/her everything Just moving lips without sound and still looking like you are Just eating buble gum.
I wear a mask and people still recognize me. Damnit! Which makes me wonder, how are they not catching all those masked outlaws?
You can also yawn during a boring conversation and not have to hide it
I beg to differ, you can definitely tell someone is yawning under their mask
Load More Replies...unfortunate side of wearing a mask all the time: you and only you are the one to suffer for how bad your breath is.
I had no idea how nasty my mouth was before this.
Load More Replies...Honestly I have COPD so am at high risk of death by Covid. Wearing a mask makes it more difficult for me to breathe and I loathe the feeling. But I still wear one in public. For all of the above reasons, quite enjoying the childlike pleasure of sticking my tongue out at people.
Exactly, I quite like wearing a mask, I don't need to look good, and I can scowl at people as much as I want
But they can still the eye roll....darn it....
Load More Replies...Also no need to worry about garlic breath and cover your mouth when yawning.
Or shave the stash!😂 I've been kinda lazy lately...lol!
Load More Replies...Wrong, because not all Americans "avoid masks". I wear one whenever I go out, so does my family. Only one person in my household goes into stores. I disinfect my groceries, etc. in accordance with standard guidelines. My state in particular has seen Covid cases go down exponentially and hasn't had any covid deaths in a while. Please don't generalize and stereotype based on what you see in the media.
Load More Replies...Also every single movie which portrays conspirationists profiteers as the villain (:
i personally think that she should not need to wear a mask while in labor i mean all the docters around her are wearing a mask and when you are pushing that hard i imagine that it is hard enough to breath without a mask this is just my opinion from the most logical point of view i can think of so dont get angry over it
No they aren't. And that's not what David meant. He meant that, from a logical point of view, that a mask would make giving birth more difficult, but not deadly. Plus, he said, "when you are pushing that hard i imagine that it is hard enough to breath without a mask". And it makes sense. I mean, come on. You're pushing a human out of your body. You shouldn't have to worry about a face mask. But masks are definitely not putting their lives at risk. I mean, where are your facts? How would a mask endanger someone? It would just make it more uncomfortable, maybe even difficult, but not fatal.
Load More Replies..."And of course eating Cheez Wiz only reduces your immune strength, but you were an idiot to start with."
And if I can wear a mask for 5 hrs straight at drama camp or the zoo or the Botanical gardens (In Georgia mind you) then you can wear one to go do some quick 15 minute shopping.
The joke is great BUT: The ones who do not wear masks can not understand your complex sentence. Try to speak like the president. He definitely can communicate with the morons. NO MASK İS VERY VERY BAD. BAAAD.
Because obviously if I don't wear a mask I am instantly going to the hospital?
At least she YGGG trying to help, doing the best she can . We thank her. Wear your mask and we will thank you too.
I'm behind making a worldwide change to the spelling just to make this work...
Load More Replies...I had the same thought! Although in hindsight, that's also representative of 2020...
Load More Replies...She's right. Emphasize how important it is that you stay safe and no American will object to wearing a mask.
No, make them think they'll do physical harm to themselves if they don't.
Load More Replies...I often think about telling macho men who refuse to wear a mask that one of the side effects of Coronavirus is impotence.
Just tell them the socialists are trying to take away your freedom to wear a mask, and they will wear them.
This is f***ing genius! Also hilarious in a sick ironic way. It would be funny if it weren't true. :(
Load More Replies...Americans are like the Hunger Games when it comes to "taking care" of others.
"Wearing a mask causes you to lose 5 lb of unsightly fat with no effort! Only $99!"
Phunny Philosopher - the term originated a few months ago (maybe longer) when President Trump tweeted out just the word "covfefe" and everyone was trying to figure out what he meant. The most likely explanation, I think, is that he fell asleep as he was posting. So now the joke is that it was actually a prescient reference to Covid-19. Hope this helps!
Thank you! Just to make sure I understand: before Coronavirus became news in the U.S., Trump accidentally tweeted the letters "covfefe". In trying to figure out what he meant, people are joking that he was predicting the future? Also, 50 points for using "prescient". I had to look it up! ;)
Load More Replies...hey that's exactly how I shop for new bra without seeing the size; as long as it covers my entire face, it's close to my size.
Excellent technique! All these people saying you need experienced fitters? Pah, what do they know!
Load More Replies...no wonder people complain about not being able to breathe through their masks :P
I have that same problem! One time friend was over and helping me fold laundry, she grabbed my bra and put one cup side in her head and asked me if I knew what the 'Jewish hats' were called because my bra cups look like one of those. It was a funny moment.
Yes, but usually the person is digging through the floor of other cabins and doesn't realise that others may object, doesn't care what they think, believes it is his right to do as he pleases, and wouldn't ever be bothered to try to fix it even as the ship went down...
Like, I know it's a typo, but dig is clearly a key word that needs to be here
Well stated ..........except for the dirty words. Perhapes they were perturbed, anxious, concerned or didn't have spell check so they could express themselves. Either way they had to jump ship, some wore their life jackets and made it to safety,, some had decided to not take their liife jackets for fear someone might think they were scared or afraid of the diiscomfort and they are misssed.
Exactly what I was thinking along with 'I bet that's because he gets the joke'
Load More Replies...Top Right is referred to as "Dingle D**k" style. The phrase was born from a meme of a man wearing his undies with his privates on the outside. It stresses the importance of wearing things properly. Please refer to this incorrect mask position as Dingle D**k style from now on please. Thank you. PS- I wish I was smart enough to post the meme with this comment. Unfortunately, I'm not.
Who are you kidding, this will never be over, it is the new normal.
I hope the brother didn't get sued or anything. And good for him that he did that! He sounds like a very cool guy to me.
When the dude grabbed his mask it was assault. At that point it's the brother's option to defend himself, let it go or call the cops. I think he made the right choice although he probably increased his chances of getting sick when he made contact with the guy.
Load More Replies...LOVE THIS!!!! I am not one for violence and stuff, but you put my life and my family's life in potential danger..... I will not hesitate.
uugh who GRABS a person's mask I'd be scared dead if that happened to me (also because of my noodle arms I couldn't defend myself)
Or to put it another way "Please respect social distancing as a punch in the face often offends."
I like the way the skunk appears to be enjoying the smell of the flower, whilst ready to release it's own scent
This is absolutely my favorite. Now lets see, who do I call to get me a sweet baby like this to carry with me when I go out in my wheelchair and have to deal with idiots who don't care about my life, only theirs? I little nudgie to his rear and he will assist my needs. Yup
This wouldn't work for me. I would assume that the skunk had her/his smell weapon removed and was tame. They can be very sweet when they are tamed. I would want to pet him/her.
So many movies about pandemics and deadly diseases and NO ONE understood the premise XP
And you coughing your lungs out on your death bed is just a really bad cold, nothing worse
Load More Replies...You could use that argument for many things in this world - terrorists, drug smugglers and illegal immigrants for a start. If you stop searching for them there would be fewer. Right??
I wonder who is more of an idiot. The one who came up with this or the ones who agree
Well, it's a joke so the people who agree are the idiots :)
Load More Replies...But what about all that water coming down my legs? I can't still be pregnant right?
Reminds me of something my MIL said when she got offended that I followed the doctors advice regarding my child instead of hers. And complained that the doctor doesn’t know anything.
Went to the grocery store today. AT LEAST 12 people not wearing masks/ have them only on their mouths. This is a saaaddd world man.
Load More Replies..."I don't know what this Rand Paul is, but it sounds disappointing". Whoever gets the reference receives my lifetime seal of approval. 41EAGwNv9L...59dd35.jpg
Up votes cuz that is one cute seal
Load More Replies...Hey Valad, f**k you. Tell some of the hundreds of people who have died that it's just a nasty cold. Tell the hospitals who are filled up with people on ventilators that it's just a nasty cold. Nasty colds don't flood our hospitals with peoples every year. God, you are a selfish moron who values the economy and money more than human life. Get bent.
Rand Paul is such a tool. He's one of those s****y MDs that only has a degree because his daddy threw money at everyone and now he is hellbent on making people sick.
Libertarian. But he tends to align with Republicans so you're basically right.
Load More Replies...The sad thing is that for every one of these idiots, there is a swath of idiots who voted for them.
His comment made me seriously wonder how Sen. Rand Paul was able to get into, and pass, ophthalmology school
I'm an American and a vet and she is right. Gretal S don't ware a mask and please hang out in and near places you are most likely to get the Corona.
Load More Replies...I'd happily wear a mask to help make sure he'll be back
Load More Replies...I am sure there are people out there that would actually do as the sign says.
Strangely, I tend to feel more comfortable with people who truly follow their logic, no matter how flawed, to the very end, even if it causes me discomfort (up to a point, at least). In a weird way I can RESPECT these people - I might think they are bloody stupid/crazy/careless/whatever, I might hate their guts, but, I can respect them. What really gets my hackles up is people who are not thorough and and change their logic per situation. And people with DOUBLE STANDARDS... there's got to be a special place in hell for them.
Load More Replies...Do you speak from experience? ;) ( I am joking. Sorry, I just couldn't resist)
Load More Replies......usually, another legal code would be enforced, depending on the locality...
Load More Replies...American war dead from Vietnam is stated at 58,222 and static. Americans deaths from COVID-19 is now 130,000 and climbing. America has the most reported infections, so yeah, I guess we’re “winning” that one.
That's the joke... they didn't win in Vietnam either.
Load More Replies...an unbelievable, terrifying, 60K cases a day that climb... in Italy, even with our useless and speechy politicians, now is low near zero. hope the same for you even with a Donnie like your... God bless and save all of you.
Yay, in ten years we will commemorate this event with a federal holiday, some discounts and a bunch of monuments scattered through the country (:
I got it! Everybody just stay inside until there are no more communicable illnesses!
The Vietnam war didn't follow "Everyone" back! It's here whether you fight or not!
This post is sarcastic, which does not translate well. It's saying "look at the irony and similarity between Coronavirus and the Vietnam war: Americans did not win the war against Vietnam. They left the country and declared a false victory." In the same way, Americans are saying they have defeated Coronavirus. They are ignoring reality and declaring a false victory.
Load More Replies...Guy did this at stop & shop less than 6 feet from me and it was not a short or light cough. I was worried for 2 weeks.
I would've looked him straight in his stupid face and said,"WOW!! THANK YOU FOR WEARING YOUR MASK TO BE SAFE!!!"🙄
Load More Replies...I solved dealing with this issue by wearing my full BSL-2 gear to the grocer. (I manage laboratories for a living). Nothing says social distancing like the guy wearing the big yellow suit asking where the whiskey and cheetos are at because the class IV respirator has fogged due to the excessive air conditioning.
happened to me when I went out for the first time in 3 months to renew my driver's license - she came to stand right beside me first smh
I would scream "ASSAULT" at the top of my lungs to anyone who did that to me.
Load More Replies...Usually, I'd take the time to educate but the level of ignorance and antagonism the trolls are displaying all throughout this entire Panda post is alarming! Just. Wear. A. Mask.
Yesterday I watched a man removing his mask in order to listen to what another man with no mask was saying. He removed his mask, then proceeded to go as near him as possible. I guess he has a rare disease. He can hear with his uncovered mouth and not his ears.
What, you think he wants to breath back in those germs? That's why he's wearing a mask, duh!
Same thing happened to me - guy pulls off his mask, then lifts his T-shirt neck up in front of his face about 8 inches away from his face (so, not covered at all) and loudly/vehemently coughed "into" his shirt, then just let his shirt fall and put his mask back on. Never seen anything so stupid ever, and I could not run out of there fast enough!
Remember the episode in Season 5 of Doctor Who when it was revealed that there were aliens inside of Earth in 2020? I'll bet it will happen any day now.
Needs to be higher...swear living in some badly written sci-fi movie...
I'm a theatre nurse, masks become 2nd nature. Try wearing one whilst scrubbed (not allowed to touch face) and with a runny nose. You soon learn to suck that snot up lol
Medical here. Masks are worn as calmly and normally as, say, underwear, socks, shoes... Y'know. Just another day! LOL on snot-sucking. As a prof once said, "It makes no difference if it goes in or out, as long as it stays in"
Load More Replies...I have seriously got to a point where if people continue to come into clinic, yelling about "I cannot be made to wear a mask it is my personal freedom not to" my response is going to be "you are so right. BTW the surgical team have decided they will not be wearing masks or scrubbing for your procedure" and see how that plays out
Stop acting as if only women refuse to wear masks. Of all the people I met who got aggressive when called out not a single one was a woman.
Wow, you're sounding a titch like a Karen, Martha!
Load More Replies...I'm starting to feel bad for any nice, decent American women named Karen.
Please edit to remove "karens" and replace it with "americans". (lowercase for a reason)
Worked in the operating room for 45 years... a mask was second nature... sometimes the mask was on for hours.... if scrubbed in a case ( sterile gown and gloves) can’t even touch the face... suck it up buttercup..
Poor little "Karen", It's difficult to step out of the comfort zone... Wear the damn mask and shut up about it!!!! If this had been done from the get-go, there would be a lot less deaths in the US. We won't talk about the mango-in-chief...
We're already talking about keeping use home 1/2 time. All our work is done by laptops so we could never go to work again. That would be nice. I'd have the longest hair and nails.
I already work from home but I do think it's an excellent idea for some companies to give staff more choice.
Load More Replies...It's not just the US who have Covid memes. The UK is largely going back to work, after working from home.
Load More Replies...It's called Lulworth Cove, the rock formation is Durdle Door. Dorset, on the UK's south coast.
At the end of lock down, this beach was overcrowded. Soon after, three people were hospitalized after stupidly jumping off the 200ft tall durdle door.
Load More Replies...And after this we're going to the anti-vaxer rally, so no time to wash your hands.
Reminds me of the post here where the parent was saying how terribly unfair it was to expect their child to keep learning during lockdown, because they didn't own a printer. Literally, go BUY a printer! Supporting your kiddo's education is part of your job!
Mommy, can I protest and maybe get in some looting and destroying other peoples lives! Yes, little antifa, the virus can't hurt you if that's what you're doing!
Now remember you are perfectly safe to not social distance or wear masks if you are rioting/looting and pretending to care about black lives. If you go to church that's where the real danger is.
Now layer on living on the top floor of a 6 story NYC walk up and forgetting it (facepalm) - the worst
This is why I have 3 in both of my vehicles and 2 in my backpack. And a package of 5 unopened masks for someone that doesn't have or forget there's.
*** FYI guys *** surgical masks don't fair well in extreme heat, so if you leave your mask in your car and live in FL (for ex), it'll ruin the integrity of the materials. (Disregard if you're mask is cloth. But if you use the removal filters... same issue stands.)
I'm a pretty chill, to-each-their-own kind of guy, but this f-ing infuriates me. I mean, great that she's not protecting herself, more power to natural selection and all, but it is endangering others and she couldn't care in the least. Deep sigh...
I hate the fact that people that stupid have so much damn money
If only she would use this ON TOP of a real mask.... so dumb it's too sad
It would be fine if she had a double layer of fabric behind it. She clearly doesn’t though, you can see her nose and mouth.
Well, in her defense diamonds are chemically inert so no viruses can live in their surface ;)
My father said that seatbelts should be called "lifebelts." He was very strict about wearing them. I buckle up even to move my car 5 meters.
We didn't wait 52 days before taking the p**s as this page demonstrates.
They’re talking about the 2001 shoe bomber from flight 63 American Airlines.
Load More Replies...Clare McDuff 35 minutes ago They’re talking about the 2001 shoe bomber from flight 63 American Airlines.
Load More Replies...It has killed people all over the world, not only Americans, you know. And It is killing thousands in developing countries.
No one died from the shoe bomber. You're thinking the wrong attack
Load More Replies...I shall hold out hope that Florida has more smart people like you in it than the morons on the beach.
Load More Replies...I think the beach is probably safer that many other places, like cinemas or pubs. Restaurants and bars are crowded in my country, and it seems to be OK, but everybody seems to object to the beach.
Oh Daniel. You really aren't the brightest bulb are you? Selfishness isn't an admirable trait so maybe you should try a tad harder mmm?
Load More Replies...In Poland there is pretty many people who thinks it's conspiracy against their freedom.
Covidiots are everywhere in the world. The pandemic has revealed the unparalleled stupidity that people can have. Downside is that they help spreading the virus, but the upside is that those people will get infected and suffer.
Load More Replies...Sadly in Quebec (Canada) also... we are so close to the US that some people get influenced by those crazy conspiration.
I've left my house less than 10 times since March 3rd. I'm good with hiding under the bed for another 6 or 8 months!
I had come to the conclusion that there were only about 30 people in the world who knew the difference between 'your' and 'you're' and 'there', 'they're' and 'their'. BP makes me think that maybe there are more of us out there and who also think it matters. That gives me comfort in these dark times. Interesting, though, that the people who don't know the difference do seem to be, shall we say, cretinous morons. Interesting correlation, eh?
Well, this guy seams to at least not be a total idiot if he insists on distancing.
Load More Replies...Unfortunately there are many people that seem to be missing the logical part of their brains.
The problem is black and white thinking. Understanding these measures work, but are not perfect. And therefore combining them makes it more effective to reach your goal. The analogy is perfect.
Load More Replies...Indeed, some officials recommend to wear masks when physical distancing is impossible.
Because nothing works 100 % of the times in every possible situation.
I get the logic but you can't really compare physics to biology in this way. It's posts like this that send people who DONT have logical thinking skills down rabbit holes and all of a sudden we have an entire portion of the population who don't shower, do dishes or laundry because they'll just get dirty again
We have sooooooo many clients to whom I have to ask to please cover their noses as well. The response I normally get is: Oh sorry I did not realise.
Yeah i did not realise the thing covering my mouth is not covering the nose on my face🤨cant come up with a better excuse peeps?
Load More Replies...heh, someone in here compared them with wearing underpants with a d**k sticking out, and that seems just too accurate..
yes, yes, that! and so if something keeps sticking out, goddamn adjust, you're wearing it wrong
The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem, too bad millions of more people need to admit it before you see any improvement.
the worst part is that the US was hit late with the virus, so could have learned the most about other countries, like Japan, with very few casualties, or could have prepared themselves better.
Jup, there is a present shortage of popcorn in Europe at the moment...
I honestly am flabbergasted at what's happened in the US. I mean, we've always been a bit smug and self-absorbed and self-serving, but holy flaming f**k nuts, this is just crazy town!
The best way to thank essential workers is to pay them living wages - and give THEM a big tax break.
We're not recovering......many places in the UK are going back into localised lockdowns.
But the UK doesn't belong to Europe anymore. You know, Brexit and all....
Load More Replies...EU has areas going back to lockdown. Less shockingly than the US, but since 2016, the world's been pretty much not-as-shocking-as-the-US...
We are not all in the same boat. The boat for the 1% is a luxury yacht. The boat for the 99% is an overcrowded leaky dinghy.
The white stuff is pith, not zest. Only the yellow outside is zest.
Load More Replies...Roses are red, violets are blue, use a mask babe, or your're dying too. The end.
Lol there are plenty of men out there that don't care, they say they don't want a penpal. They don't care about the virus, they are willing to risk it
Maybe, oh maybe in 2020 after all this equality talk women could consider to do their part of courtship, too.
if they end up being a serial killer, "roses are red, my name is dan, i have a gun, get in the van"
It's not just the mask. It is anything that makes them feel uncomfortable, vaccines, lock downs, quarantines.....
So tired of the 'Karen' trope but at least it's a step up from 'OK Boomer.'
That finger needs to be on the trigger like that Saint Louis Karen who pointed it at protesters
She will also ask you to join her downline and "be your own boss and the CEO of your own MLM business". Just DM her for details!
Good idea! Let them know a mask can block most of the pepper spray, so their choice!
That's 2020 for you. I am scared: we are only in the middle of it.
Ironic you said hair salon 'cause, ya know, Yul Brynner.
Load More Replies...One of my family’s cats is called Stitch and now I really want one of those bags so I can do that with her and call it Abercrombie and Stitch.
This is the kind of man I wanna spend the rest of my life with ;)
We have a Polynesian joint here in town that uses one of the traditional wood and sharktooth swords for the same purpose. It is awesome. (They refuse to sell me the sword, it would look great in the gun rack on my redneck Jeep next to the butterfly net...owner says he will teach me to make my own when the pandemic ends if we both survive.)
Hope you get to take him up on it - a sword you made yourself would be awesome!
Load More Replies...From where Europeans standing it looks more like a hilarious freakshow playing 24/7 with every other second a new joke. We do have our share of stupid morons, but the US.......
Simple. Toilet paper represents how some people treat the US Constitution. "It's only for ME! ME ME ME ME ME!"
And virtually all of the worlds supply of Remdesivir... nice US.
Load More Replies...It's because most of them can't wipe their arses and are in a bad mood because of how much they itch. Think about how short T-Rex arms were and how angry they were all the time
We are a country of extremes, my friend. Now move over, eh? Ya hoser.
Its a play of the taco shop's theme, "Lucha Libre". Even the bottom is awesome, "If you are a luchador, please wear both"
I do not understand this one. Please explain the diamond reference. (still the best render of sars-cov-2 viroid however)
YouTubers get awards based on how many views they get. The faster they get them the better.
Load More Replies...Ahhhhhhh Skyrim...all that cold snow would still be better than this....
Oh, where can we get this? Daughter & O/H would wear these for sure,
I think the rest of the world should also ban travel to and from the US. Too risky.
As an American, I agree with you. Stay away from us because it may have started in China but it ends here. We will be the last ones to fully recover. When we're done you can come over to play again.
Load More Replies...I live in middle-Europe and will gladly offer an apartment to my friends if they ever decide to emigrate into a country with free healthcare, free university education, maternity leave, and cheap and good beer. Plus, we have castles, halušky, and a great wine region. Oh, and we have a Starbucks in my city, too.
How did you feel about it in America? The lady seems to be really concerned and ashamed that the US tourists were banned. In Europe, we all were like "meh, that's logical, not a big deal. Was it really perceived as a strong signal in the US?
From the limited discussions I've heard and participated in, we think it's logical. Many of us know we, as a country, are disliked, especially now.
Load More Replies...It's okay though, according to the Cheeto Jesus it'll just go away.
In the meantime, Polish president visited USA and is super proud of it...
Non-essential does not mean non-valuable. There are things we can live without but shouldn't live without. (I am not referring to telemarketers.)
I got partway through your comment before thinking telemarketers are pretty non-valuable. Thank you for clarificaiton.
Load More Replies...How about Actors, Actresses & Influencers. Do we really need them any more. If we keep them do they really deserve the pay checks they get for what they do?
Yeah yeah yeah New Zealand is so easy to manage though. It's small and they don't even have snakes there. But good on you. Stay healthy and smug
"And they don't even have snakes", Ha! Laughing out loud at work!
Load More Replies...You know that scene in Atlantis: The Lost Empire when the volcano erupts and the Heart of Atlantis creates a force field around the city to keep the lava out? That’s what it’s like being in New Zealand right now. SO GRATEFUL.
Unfortunately, yeah, I did think 2020 would be a turnaround year for me- Lose weight, get engaged, make mustache much more on pointeder, buy new car and generally get off my a*s and upgrade my life. Then I got sad because reasons. Now, I'm optimistic again because I remember that 2020 is the end of this decade. Not the start of the next one. The next decade is gonna be my decade.
Well, if you look like your profile picture right now, that's a pretty awesome mustache :)
Load More Replies...Had a car crash in January - hit a suicidal guy WALKING ON THE FREEWAY. Kobe died. Rump was not impeached. I had flu starting March 3, it turned to bronchitis, then e coli, I've just now recovered, although my oxygen levels are still really low. I have peroneal tendinitis, tenosynovitis in one leg, ANOTHER collapsed disc in my spine. Husband is furloughed, company will probably close entirely, unemployment has taken a month to start paying. Federal tax refund delayed as well. Great year. GREAT.
nope. 2019 was my year. i was crying when we were counting down at NYE, trying to enjoy every last second of it :-(
Coming from the browser that causes different viruses... "@intentexplorer"
This raises the question of whether that’s something that can be controlled.
As someone who went on multiple intense roller coasters at Six Flags Great America this past summer.. it's kinda not.
Load More Replies...Guaranteed no babies will be named Karen for a very long time.
Load More Replies...And yet the virus is not scared off. Must be they are doing it wrong.
RIP Chadwick Boseman. May you rule amongst the other panthers in the City of the Dead
Next picture should be of a field of dead labelled America with African tribesmen stabbing the corpses spears labelled Covid-19 with the caption "make sure there are no survivors"
Couldn't he have "come back to life" while Andy was asleep or having dinner?
man, i was just wishing for a 2020 update to death note recently, with all of the mask wearing
And if they get a poor grade, they blame *you*... And you're all, "Hey, you didn't do it, you don't get the A for non-effort"... Covid19, yes. Good grade, no.
Load More Replies...Person of interest is a great tv show! But I feel this joke makes more sense if the last pic says Corona rather than America.
Load More Replies...It took her exactly 9 days of being free and carefree to get infected. I'm sure there are Americans who can do better.....
That's what i'm thinking. That meme seems to be poking fun at people who do that.
Load More Replies...no joke, i kind of hope she dies, that level of arrogant idiocy needs repercussions
They're not fooling anyone with those leaves - we know they don't need to be that big.
Load More Replies...Yes, because all The 10 million People who died never prayed. Of course a Bible straped tô The face insted of a actual mask is the answer. 🙄
I want to point out so much about this woman's health and mindset, but mostly I want to duck b/c damn, she can't handle a gun worth a c**p... What's her motto, SAFETY LAST? (Wait. No mask. Bare feet. Gun waving around. Yep. Safety last...)
And this is an attorney. Missouri... what are ya gonna do?
Load More Replies...That is a Jennings Arms .380 they are more dangerous to the shooter than the target. Also, why does no one discuss that the "protesters" smashed down the security gate to gain access to this property?
Nothing like destroying private property and getting away with it. I have yet to see any pics of the destroyed gates on any news source. Only them waving guns.
Load More Replies...hahaha i just started reading the comments expecting someone noticed that!
Load More Replies...In 2120 people will be too busy surviving to actually care how the streets looked in 2020.
Nah. 100 years from now we've either figured it out and survival is easy, or we're extinct.
Load More Replies...Every time an American says "WE ARE THE BEST! WE ARE NUMBER 1" I think of the scene in Doctor who when the Daleks and Cybermen are arguing and the Daleks say "You are superior at dying!"
Yep, we're #1: in mass incarceration, maternal mortality in the developed world, bankruptcies due to medical bills, military spending...
The way things are going I really don’t see the US coming back from this anytime soon.
I'm in the US and it's so beyond frustrating it really makes me want to scream. Everyday it's something else that's absolutely crazy and utterly incredulous. Not to mention how utterly embarrassing it all is that trump is even considered a leader. I don't think we'll ever heal from this huge divide and now we know who the a******s are we can't unsee it when and if life goes back to somewhat normalcy if Biden wins and the election isn't rigged again. Blah
Load More Replies...Lol anybody else realise the guy representing U.S.A is Captain America?😂
Vicky Zar it's very hard not to lose hope a little when this is all anyone can see and feel. I limit my news intake to 15 mins a day but it still gets me so overwhelming and yes I've lived in Canada before I'm not ruling out moving again. Thanks for the words of encouragement
Kellyanne Conway actually said something to the effect that Covid-19 was nothing special because we'd already experienced 18 variations of it before.
That's not gonna work. That antivirus looks like it's from the year 2000. You need the latest 2020 version with updated definitions.
I actually had to explain this to fellow choir members about 6 years ago. I had a bad cough and flu, but had to go to rehearsals to deal with sheet music. I wore a mask since I was coughing uncontrollably. They actually asked if I thought I would get sick from them. No, dummies, I'm already sick & have to be here, but want you all to be well when we perform in 2 weeks!!
Member of a choir in Australia, we hold choir practice over Zoom.
Load More Replies...Sadly, yes. Swine flu potential pandemic virus brewing already. PLEASE VACCINATE AGAINST FLU. Even if you get sick, it's not as bad as getting the full no-help-at-all-from-vaccine swine flu. Thank you. PSA over.
I always get the vaccine because of health problems. This year I'm rather worried that it won't be so easy to get one as demand will probably increase and the makers of the drugs will get caught out - they have form on that front after all. I would very much prefer to be wrong here.
Load More Replies...I'm going to ask out of curiosity. In my country, this gesture with the finger means "I don't believe you". Does it mean the same in English speaking countries or is it just a coincidence?
The gesture does not have a specific meaning in the US, but the context of him hiding his face and looking uncomfortable signals that he is either lying or dodging the question.
Load More Replies...I have cut my hair, my children's hair and my poodle mutt's hair. We all survived and we actually look half way decent. And even if we didn't, IT'S ONLY HAIR.
One good thing about hair is it grows back.
Load More Replies...Oh god I HATE stuff like this! Any other kind of "_____ lives matter" is racist and diminishing. It's resistance language.
These are very funny, it's good to have a sense of humor during these times
Me pre-Covid19: "OK, I can cope with anything!:_____ Me now: "Please don't make me come out from under the bed!"
Anti-masker to doctor: You may have gone to medical school for over eight years, but I passed an online course on farming, so. . .
Oh, that was you. Um, maybe I should have not curved the grading....
Load More Replies...I am not even remotely surprised about how things are going here in the US. We elected Donald f*cking Trump for christsake. I vote we just send everyone who refuses to wear a mask to Texas and let them 'govern' themselves. Hell, give them Oklahoma too. They can take Trump with them and call themselves the Independent Republic of Covfefe.
Hay I live in Texas. Keep your maskless trash to your self. We got tons of these idiots already.
Load More Replies...Back when presidents were able to walk and run carrying the entire country on the shoulder.
I'm happy to live in a part of the US that isn't seeing an increase in new cases. Maybe it's because I live in the middle of no where, but no one wears masks around here, no social distance, everything is open and nothing. I honestly forget about Covid.
Just one infected person coming in from the outside will turn that into a hellsite.
Load More Replies...Oh, these are too good! Just what I needed, a damn good laugh, especially the one with the masks made from bra cups
These are very funny, it's good to have a sense of humor during these times
Me pre-Covid19: "OK, I can cope with anything!:_____ Me now: "Please don't make me come out from under the bed!"
Anti-masker to doctor: You may have gone to medical school for over eight years, but I passed an online course on farming, so. . .
Oh, that was you. Um, maybe I should have not curved the grading....
Load More Replies...I am not even remotely surprised about how things are going here in the US. We elected Donald f*cking Trump for christsake. I vote we just send everyone who refuses to wear a mask to Texas and let them 'govern' themselves. Hell, give them Oklahoma too. They can take Trump with them and call themselves the Independent Republic of Covfefe.
Hay I live in Texas. Keep your maskless trash to your self. We got tons of these idiots already.
Load More Replies...Back when presidents were able to walk and run carrying the entire country on the shoulder.
I'm happy to live in a part of the US that isn't seeing an increase in new cases. Maybe it's because I live in the middle of no where, but no one wears masks around here, no social distance, everything is open and nothing. I honestly forget about Covid.
Just one infected person coming in from the outside will turn that into a hellsite.
Load More Replies...Oh, these are too good! Just what I needed, a damn good laugh, especially the one with the masks made from bra cups
