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Okay, so you might have opened this article because of its weird topic, expecting to see a set of clockwork teeth jumping out of the screen, perhaps. But, despite the title sounding a bit kooky, you would never have thought about how punny and hilarious teeth can be! We didn’t expect it either, but once we found out about this glorious dental jokes category, we couldn’t believe the gold mine of fun that we found! So, no matter if you are a dentist, a dental technician, or just a regular person, these dental jokes are sure to bemuse you with their wit. Be as it may, most of us have teeth, and that’s one point of relatability that surely resonates.
These jokes will come clickety-clacking at you with the fun they are carrying, and they will bite you with the sharp puns they employ. No buck-toothed amusement here, but only awesome jokes to parade your pearly whites while reading! A galore of relatable jokes you have no idea you needed in your life! A compendium of amusement that’s as sharp in the wit as a kitten’s canines! A true old-school delight that we’ve just unearthed.
So, before we all start getting a bit long in the tooth, let’s end this banter and skip right to these dentist jokes just a bit further down. Read them, enjoy them, and have fun with them, but don’t forget to vote for the best ones! After this is all well and done, share these dental jokes with anyone who might have teeth and relate. So, basically, everyone!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Absolute unit of tooth pics
What do dentists call the x-rays they take of patients’ teeth?
Tooth pics.
RELATED:
#2
Plot twist: phone fears cavities too
Why did the smartphone go to the dentist? It had a Bluetooth.
#3
When Your Smile Hides the Struggle
Depression in dentists is a serious dental illness.
#4
Math teacher’s worst nightmare
If a kid has 25 candy bars and they eat 22 of them, what do they have? Cavities.
#6
Dentists Deserve a Little Sweetness Too
Why should you be kind to your dentist? Because they have fill-ings too.
#7
Where Smiles Go to Retire
What’s the most popular state for dentists to move to when they retire? Fluorida.
#8
Bet you weren’t expecting that career plot twist
Patient: What did you do before you became a dentist? Dentist: I was in the Army. Patient: What did you do in the Army? Dentist: I was a drill sergeant.
#10
Priorities > Pain, Apparently
Dentist: Can you please help me? Scream as loud as you can, like you’re in a lot of pain. Patient: Why? My tooth isn’t hurting this time. Dentist: Because there are many patients in the waiting room, and I don’t want to miss the game!
#11
That escalated quickly, but hey, a deal’s a deal
A man goes to the dentist to ask how much it would be to pull a tooth. “$100,” said the dentist. “Oh, that’s expensive,” said the main. “Do you have anything cheaper?” “That’s the normal price for an extraction,” said the dentist. The man thinks about it, “what about if you don’t use the anesthetic?” “Well, that would be unusual, but we could do that. It would be about $75.” The man thinks some more. “What about if you used a trainee and no anesthetic?” “Well,” said the dentist, ”I think that could work, but it would be a lot more painful. I think that would be about $35.” The man thought some more. “That’s still a lot. What if you make it a training session with a student doing the extraction, and the other students can watch?” The dentist says, “Ok, that would be good for the students, but it will be traumatic to have it done that way. I’ll charge you $5 for that.” “Great,” said the man. “That’s perfect. Can I book my wife for her appointment on Wednesday?
#12
Biting Off More Than They Can Chew
Who’s job is the most dangerous in Transylvania? The dentist who works on Dracula.
#13
Trust issues, even with dentists
My dentist asked me to open up, but I don’t know him well enough to confide in him.
#14
Finally, a compliment from the dentist
What did the dentist say to a golfer with a cavity? You have a hole in one.
#15
Guess I’ll Be Late Again
What’s the best time to go to the dentist? Toothhurty (2:30).
#17
Guess who’s not flossing tonight
What are the six most dreaded words in the world?
"The dentist will see you now."
#18
Rooting for the real MVP
Why does the dental staff go to the dentist with their problems? Because she gets right to the root of things.
#19
Dark side, meet bright smile
Why did the Storm Trooper want his teeth whitened? To get rid of the dark side.
#20
Well, That Escalated Quickly
What’s one word you never want to hear from your dentist? Oops.
#21
When Your Smile’s Just Done With It
Why did the yellow tooth not find the white tooth’s jokes funny?
Because he was already dead inside.
#22
Teeth Today, Gone Tomorrow
What did the 90 year old say to his great-grandson? I miss the days of being your age when my teeth were in my mouth 24/7!
#23
This Mix Just Hits Different
So my friend told me I’m crazy for investing all my money into a business that offers a boxing gym, a dentist, and a manicurist all under one roof. I told him "I’m going to fight tooth and nail for it." Now if only I could just think of a clever name for it, I’d be all set.
#24
This Joke Really Drilled In
Why did the dentist get arrested by the FBI? For supplying false identiteeth!
#25
Brushing Teeth Like You Mean It
Which teeth do you need to brush?
The ones you want to keep.
#26
Flossing but Make It Dance
My dentist said I should try flossing more. I’ve started taking dance lessons now.
#27
Cold teeth, hot problem
What made the snowman go to see a dentist? He was suffering from frostbite.
#28
Toothpaste with a brass twist
What do tuba players use to brush their teeth? A tuba toothpaste.
#29
Didn’t See That One Coming
What does a dentist do when the plane lands?
She “braces” herself.
#30
Guess the dentist’s out of this world
What is it called when an astronaut gets a cavity? A black hole.
#32
Priorities Over Pain, Honestly
What kind of filling did the little boy want for his cavity? Chocolate.
#33
When Animals Go DIY
What do you get when you cross a hedgehog with a giraffe?
A long-neck toothbrush.
Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦 3 years ago
Not gonna lie, I actually tried to picture a hedgehog crossed with a giraffe.
#34
Shockingly Relatable Dental Drama
Why was the god of Thunder so quiet after he got his tooth pulled? Because he was too Thor.
#35
Bat breath? That’s a mood.
Why did the vampire’s breath stink so badly? Because he had bat breath.
#37
Tongue’s Lowkey Dentist Drama
Why does your tongue hate going to the dentist?
It always leaves it feeling depressed.
#39
This Pain Is Just an Illusion
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused to have an anesthetic injection when he was going for a filling? Apparently, he wanted to transcend dental medication.
#40
This Joke’s Got Bite
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dishes. Dishes, who? Dishes how I talk since I lost my teeth!
#41
Smartest bite on campus
What was the tooth called who went to Oxford University?
The Wisdom Tooth.
#43
Worth the wait and the wallet pain
I went on a date with a dentist last night. At the end of the date, she said she’d had a great time and she’d like to see me again in 6 month’s time. It ended up costing me an absolute fortune as well!
#44
Oral fixation meets backyard vibes
What do dentists have in their garden? Dentistrees and implants!
#45
When Treats Get a Dentist’s Nod
What’s the only sweet food that dentists approve of?
Candy’floss’!
Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦 3 years ago
Did you know that one of the inventors of machine spun cotton candy/candy floss/fairy floss was a dentist?
#46
Sweet Tooth Shutdown
What did my dentist do to stop me eating so many sweet treats? Put a sign over my mouth saying ‘Donut Enter’.
#47
Fight for the Remote, Fight Over Teeth
Why do dentists always fight over the TV remote? To change the TV canal!
#48
Oops, Caffeine Confessions
My teeth were stained, so the dentist asked me, “do you smoke or drink coffee?”
I told him I drink it.
#49
Patience Isn’t Always Cheap
Patient: How much does it cost to have a tooth pulled? Dentist: $100. Patient: All that for only a few minutes of work? That’s expensive. Dentist: Don’t worry, I can pull it out slower if you’d like.
#50
When flexing goes too literal
He said to put my money where my mouth is, so I got gold fillings.
#51
Different Dentists, Different Floss-ophy
Why is it sometimes necessary to get a second opinion from a dentist? Because each dentist has their own floss-ophy.
#52
When bravery takes a coffee break
What is the number one reason patients don’t show up for root canals? They lose their nerve.
#53
Rooting for good teeth care
Why are potatoes a dentist’s favorite veggie?
Because they are so filling.
#54
Goodbye? More like fill me in!
What did the tooth say to the dentist before he left for vacation? Fill me in when you get back.
#55
Cavity Classics, Anyone?
What movie do dentists watch over and over again? Plaque to the Future.
#56
Queen energy confirmed
What did the patient say when the dentist said she needed a crown? "I know, right?"
#58
This Doc Drilled Me Deep
Did you see the new documentary about wisdom teeth on Netflix? It’s called an Inconvenient Tooth.
#61
This Smile’s Got Secrets
Why is the Securities and Exchanges Commission investigating the dentist?
He’s accused of incisor trading.
#62
Laughing way too hard at this one
What’s a dentist’s favorite emote to use when they play Fortnite? The floss.
#63
Mood swings, but make it Eddie
Have you seen Eddie recently? He’s been so moody! Ah yeah, don’t worry about him he always seems to have a chip on his shoulder these days.
#64
Pun Intended, Obviously
What did Ash Ketchum say to his tooth when he pulled it out? I Chews You!
#65
Plot twist: love and hygiene both matter
My wife who was a dentist passed away. "I’ve loved and I’ve flossed."
#66
Plot twist, but make it dental
When did the dentist become a brain surgeon? When he dropped the drill.
#67
You Can’t Just Chew on That Here
Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist’s window? Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.
#68
Wait, the dentist’s mom?!
While I was waiting to see the dentist, a woman came out of his inner office smiling. Nodding to me, she said, “Thank goodness my work is completed. I’m so glad to have found a painless dentist and one who’s so gentle and understanding too.” When seated in the dentist chair, I related the incident to the doctor. He laughed and explained, “Oh, that was just my Mother.”
#69
Dentists Literally Overthink Everything
How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to administer the anesthetic, one to extract the light bulb, and one to offer the socket some vile pink mouthwash.
#70
Dentist visits that actually recharge you
"I’ve no idea why people hate going to the dentist so much. In my opinion, it can be very refilling."
#71
Security smiles only here
What do you get if you cross a dentist and security personnel? A mouthguard!
#73
Classic dental classroom vibes
How do dentists teacher’s say when starting to teach the ABC’s?
“Say Ahhh!”
#77
Too literal, but okay
What do dentists say when you offer to hold the door open for them?
“Open wide!”
#80
Cavity-Free and Not-So-Great
What’s a dentist’s favourite and least favourite colour? Pearly white and Plack!
#81
No cap, they’re all about the truth
Dentists make the best witnesses because they always tell the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth.
#82
Guess they really love to run with their brushes
Never stop a dentist that’s running – they might be in a brush!
#83
Flossing Off the Shade
Dentists aren’t easily offended, they always manage to brush it off!
#84
Fore! That’s Some Dental Humor
What did the dentist say when Tiger Woods came in for an appointment?
You have a hole in one.
#85
Flossing... but make it seasonal
Dentist: Do you floss? Patient: Yes, I floss religiously. Dentist: Really? Patient: Of course, on Christmas and Easter.
#86
Echoes of dental doom
The dentist told his patient to open wider. “My goodness!” he said. “You’ve got the biggest cavity I’ve seen, the biggest cavity I’ve seen.” “Ok,” said the patient, “but I’m scared enough. Do you need to repeat yourself?” “I didn’t,” said the dentist. “That was the echo.”
#87
That’s dentist humor hitting different
A young boy was sitting in the waiting room for a little bit after getting his tooth pulled. The receptionist asked him if he was ok. “Yes, but I didn’t like the bad word the dentist used while he was pulling my tooth.” “What did he say?” asked the receptionist, worried. “Oops.”
#88
Logic that hits different
A young girl was talking to her dad about what she wanted to be when she grew up. She was thinking about becoming a heart doctor or a tooth doctor. “Dentist,” said her father. “Why?” the little girl asked. “We only have one heart, but we have 32 teeth.”
#89
Plot twist: Dinosaurs flossed too
What’s the dentist’s favorite kind of dinosaur?
A floss-iraptor.
#90
Too legit to quit teeth
What does the dentist do when he’s on a roller coaster? Brace himself.
#91
Dentist or VIP Screening Room?
My dentist has a TV in the exam room. I go there for Netflix and drill.
#92
Why does this feel like a horror movie?
"I have to have a root canal done. Just the thought of it is unnerving."
#93
Wait, She’s Got an Implant?
Until it came out in conversation, no one knew she had a dental implant.
#97
Honestly, that one hit different
What’s the dentist’s favorite idiom?
Put your money where your mouth is.
#98
Plot twist: Not the usual drill
Why did the FBI raid the dentist’s office? To perform a cavity search.
#99
That joke definitely took a bite
Why did the doughnut go to the dentist? He needed a filling.
#100
Teeth don’t lie, but people might
Why should you be true to your teeth? So, they won’t be false with you.
#101
Nighttime squad goals
What do false teeth have in common with stars?
They only come out at night.
#102
Ants know where the real snacks are
Why does the ant hang out at the bakery? Because it has a sweet tooth.
#103
Cavity Party Crashers
What did one tooth say to the other? Get your cap on; the dentist is taking us out tonight.
#106
Dentist Gone Abroad, Literally
Why was a Toronto dentist in Panama? He was searching for the root canal.
#108
Worth every cringe and penny
Patient: How much will it cost me to have this tooth pulled out? Dentist: £500. Patient: £500 for just a few minutes work? That’s hardly cheap. Dentist: No worries, I’ll pull it out slowly if you prefer.
#109
Gentle vs. Go Big—Dentist Edition
What’s the difference between American and British dentists?
British dentists tend to be more careful with their patients where as American dentists tend to yank teeth.
#110
Plot twist: double flexibility goals
What sort of an act do you do? I bend over backwards and pick up a handkerchief with my teeth. Anything else? Then I bend over backwards and pick up my teeth.
#111
Plot twist: dental services not included
A man coughed violently, and his false teeth shot across the room and smashed against the wall. “Oh, dear,” he said, “whatever shall I do? I can’t afford a new set.” “Don’t worry,” said his friend. “I’ll get a pair from my brother for you.” The next day the friend came back with the teeth, which fitted perfectly. “This is wonderful,” said the man. “Your brother must be a very good dentist.” “Oh, he’s not a dentist,” replied the friend, “he’s an undertaker.”
#112
Brace yourself, that wait’s real
Patient: Doctor, if I give up candy, pizza, popcorn and gum, will my braces come off sooner? Dentist: Not really. It will just seem longer.
#113
Not So Painless After All
When a new dentist set up in a small town he quickly acquired a reputation of being the latest kind of “Painless” dentist. But a local lad quickly disputed this. “He’s a fake! ” he told his mates. “He’s not painless at all. When he stuck his finger in my mouth I bit him – and he yelled like anyone else.”
#115
When a Toothache Turns Into a Soundtrack
Fred’s mother was on the telephone to the boy’s dentist. “I don’t understand it,” she complained, “I thought his treatment would only cost me $20, but you’ve charged me $80.” “It is usually $20, ma’am,” agreed the dentist, “but Fred yelled so loudly that three of my other patients ran away!“
#116
When Braces Feel Like a Bank Heist
Patient to Dentist: “How much to get my teeth straightened?” “Twenty thousand pounds” says the Dentist. The Patient heads for the door. Dentist to patient: “Where are you going?” “To a plastic surgeon to get my mouth bent.”
#117
Professional perks, if you squint
A patient asked the dentist if it wasn’t nasty to spend the day with the hands in someone’s mouth.
The dentist answered “I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet.”
#118
Plot twist: Dental drama inside
A book never written: “I Have a Toothache” by Phil McCavity.
#119
Caught Between a Rock and a Hard Plaque
Why did the dentist get lost at sea? Because he was exploring the great barrier teeth!
#120
Well, that’s one way to fill a cavity
What happened when the dentist crashed into a car? They left a dent!
#124
Classic dad joke energy
Knock Knock. Whose there? Dennis. Dennis who? Dennis appointment reminder!
#125
Cavity of My Heart
What did the dentist say when her boyfriend said he loved her?
“I love you too-th!”
#126
No thanks, I like my teeth too much
A dentist walks into a bar and then walks straight out again. “The sugar content in these drinks is ridiculous!”
#127
Rooting for the punchline
What was a dentist’s favourite part of maths at school? Sub-extraction!
#128
Didn’t See That Bill Coming
Knock knock. Whose there? Tooth! Tooth who? Toothin crust pizza? That’ll be $19.99 please!
#129
Toothfully Unstoppable
What household appliance can’t a dentist live without?
The (mouth)washing machine!
#130
Plot twist: Chickens are toothless
Why didn’t the dentist cross the road? Because chicken don’t have teeth!
#131
Plaques Over Papers, Always
Dental graduation certificates are always printed on a plaque.
#133
Plot twist: The tooth’s thrilled
What did the dentist say to the tooth when he had to leave the room?
I’ll fill you in when I get back.
#134
This Bear Plays No Tooth Games
What does the dentist give a bear with a hurting tooth? Anything it wants.
#135
Networking, but make it dental
Word-of-mouth was how I got my job at the dentist’s office.
#136
Guess My Teeth Are Extra Loud Now
"When I went to the dentist, he put all caps on my teeth. Now I can’t stop shouting."
#137
Plot twist: cavities at the gas pump
What’s another name for a dentist’s office?
A filling station.
#139
Plot twist: dentist drops the mic
What did the dentist shout in the courtroom? You can’t handle the tooth!
#140
Flossing Out the Drama
Why did the dentist and her boyfriend break up? They fought tooth and nail.
#141
When Your Dentist Meets Gothic Decor
What do dentists say when their patient is a gothic water spout carved out of stone?
Gargoyle!
#142
Puns That Make You Smile
Why are dentists so detailed orientated? Because they go through everything with a fine-tooth comb!
#144
This Actually Made Me Smile
What are dentist’s favourite dishes? Teeth Wellington and Tooth-Pasta!
#146
When Your Dentist Thinks Soap Is Mouthwash
Don’t disrespect an old-fashioned dentist, they’ll tell you to wash your mouth out with soap.
#147
Wait, That Retainer’s Not What You Think
Beware if a dentist asks for a hefty retainer, they might not be talking about a mouthguard!
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