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Have you ever thought of the best comeback only after it was too late? Right before bed, while taking a shower or standing in an elevator, you get your light-bulb moment: “Ahh, why didn't I think of it before?” The French even came up with a term for that, l'esprit de l'escalier—the spirit of the staircase—and it means that the perfect retort arises only when it doesn't matter anymore.

However, this does not apply to everyone. A select few have the superpower of coming up with snappy one-liners on the spot, and the r/CleverComebacks subreddit is the site to go for these legendary comments. As the moderators put it, “If someone just got shown up, this is the place to post it.“

So make sure to scroll down and upvote your favorite retorts! And if you can't get enough of snappy comebacks, make sure to check out Bored Panda's previous posts here, here and here.

#1

He Was Asking For It!

He Was Asking For It!

LittleJohnny_nutter Report

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A B C
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a prick. I'm against violence, but that idiot was screaming for it.

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If you'd like to share a post on the “Clever Comebacks“ subreddit page, there's a few rules you need to follow. Firstly, you should know what a witty comment is. According to the moderators, it's “responses to someone that, for lack of a better word, roasts them.” Also, baseless insults, tasteless jokes, “no, u” style replies are what they call garbage content, and nobody likes them.

When you think about it, the only obvious goal when trying to think of a snappy comeback is to get a good laugh and share your original thought. And the same applies to real-life situations. If you hate those awkward moments when your friends or coworkers throw you a snide comment and everything that comes to your mind just sounds lame, don't worry. In real life, not many people can be as clever as Dr. House or Chandler Bing, but there's a few ways you can improve your reactions and become wittier.

One of the things that could make you better is the world of improv acting. When it comes to showing your wit, timing is everything. The reply should be as spontaneous as the words that took you by surprise. One way of improving would be to become a better active listener. As Abigail Paul, workshop facilitator and training developer, told the BBC, “people think faster than others speak, giving the listener “extra time“ to compose an answer, even while they give the appearance of still listening to what the other person is saying.”

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Come to think of it, there have been many times when we already wanted to share an idea with the person who's not yet finished talking. “Most of us don't listen to the whole message,” Paul said, “we are just waiting to make our own points.” So if you want to whip out snappy remarks, you should actively listen to what the other person is saying and use the unexpected material she or he gave you.

#3

Not Be A Baby Machine

Not Be A Baby Machine

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A B C
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"the transformed wife"? "godly womanhood"? Gosh, that lady is so brainwashed, it's sparkling inside her head.

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#4

This Always Makes Me Laugh

This Always Makes Me Laugh

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Michelle
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As much as I don’t like a lot of PETAs ways of doing things, this reply did make me laugh

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Sometimes, when we receive a biting remark, we might feel offended. Belina Raffy, a business improvisation consultant, said that negative comments usually come from a place of insecurity. So when it comes to your coworker who constantly tosses you rude remarks, remember that responding positively might ease the pressure and keep projects going smoothly. ”Positive witty comments build trust among colleagues, bosses and subordinates, and they can turn a formerly harsh environment into an accepting one,” Raffy said.

#5

It Was Social Distancing Haha

It Was Social Distancing Haha

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Raven Sheridan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Clearly this person got their prehistoric knowledge from watching The Flintstones.

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#6

They Don't Give A Damn

They Don't Give A Damn

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Kristin Burggraf
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7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can I interest you in some fairtrade organic aloe for that... BURN?!?!?!

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Another great tip would be silencing your inner critic: “It’s about letting go of the need to judge ourselves,” Raffy explains. You should try saying what's on your mind without thinking about it. In improv theater, actors try to let go of their inner voice and give in to their “deepest fantasies” in order to say something spontaneous that they would never say in real life.

#7

German History Lesson

German History Lesson

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Me Me
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

- printing press - light bulb - telephone - tape recorder - turntable - mp3 - tv - first freely programmable computer - generator - automobile - jet engine - helicopter - jeans - toothpaste - periodic table of elements - theory of relativity - x-rays - nuclear fission - bacteriology - aspirin Just to name a few.

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#8

Oof. That Burn Needs Some Love

Oof. That Burn Needs Some Love

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#9

Someone Needs A Refresher On Anatomy

Someone Needs A Refresher On Anatomy

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Otter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So THAT'S how his wife explained all those kids, even if he never had sex with her while awake!

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Let's not forget the brands that make clever comebacks a key part of their communication with customers. One obvious example is the fast-food chain Wendy's and their made-up social media holiday—National Roast Day. Their communications team does not hold back when it comes to witty replies in their social channels. The question is, do the customers actually value it?

#10

A Punchline From Twitter, Does This Count As A Meme?

A Punchline From Twitter, Does This Count As A Meme?

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#12

Got Roasted By A Police Twitter

Got Roasted By A Police Twitter

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A survey by Sprout Social suggests that such responses are actually not appreciated by customers. Brand personality should connect your product to its consumers but as it turns out, that's not always the case. Sprout surveyed 1,000 consumers on which traits they want brands to share on social media and what action behaviors like humor or friendliness cause.

#14

Yep May Be It Is True

Yep May Be It Is True

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Andy Acceber
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not illegal to seek asylum. Also, documented immigrants have lower rates of committing violent, property, or drug crimes than native-born citizens. Undocumented immigrants have rates even lower than them. The anti-immigrant, xenophobic fear-mongering that happens here is ridiculous and repulsive. Here's the research if anyone needs to educate friends or family: https://www.pnas.org/content/117/51/32340

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#15

Whatever Your Weakness, There's A Hellion To Exploit It

Whatever Your Weakness, There's A Hellion To Exploit It

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River Webb
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

do you think Jeff has anymore d*** rockets? I need to get off this planet, permanently

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It seems that “three-quarters of consumers surveyed believe there’s value in brands exhibiting humor on social but only one-third actually want brands to bring on the snark full force.” The majority of consumers buy from brands that are honest, helpful and friendly. “It turns out that at the end of the day, consumers want brands to use social as a customer care channel”, Sprout explains. So while this kind of risky brand personality offers you a great deal of exposure, it seems that it's actually bad for business.

#16

Most Of Us Are Too

Most Of Us Are Too

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#17

Elon Musk Gets Destroyed By Facts And Logic

Elon Musk Gets Destroyed By Facts And Logic

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Lastly, for a clever comeback to be considered great, it has to be honest. "The best retorts speak truth — when a person calls something that the other people didn't see," said Paul. "That's generally what makes us laugh." So if you think of a clever comeback that's piercingly accurate and say it right there on the spot, you feel absolutely great because you know that you've earned it.

#19

True Perfection Has Been Achieved

True Perfection Has Been Achieved

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#20

Old But Gold

Old But Gold

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Julie C Rose
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Congratulations to Australia for deporting her when she acted like a brat about quarantining.

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#21

Accessible Parking, But Only During Office Hours

Accessible Parking, But Only During Office Hours

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#24

Finnally A Manager Making A Comeback

Finnally A Manager Making A Comeback

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#25

Found This While Browsing Instead Of Sleeping

Found This While Browsing Instead Of Sleeping

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#26

Would You Like Some Whine With That?

Would You Like Some Whine With That?

BelleAriel Report

#30

Technically He Spoke Genders Into Existence Because By His Very Word He Can Create

Technically He Spoke Genders Into Existence Because By His Very Word He Can Create

johnmory Report

#31

I Prayed For Help And God Sent Doctors With The Vaccine, I Said "No Thanks, I'm Waiting For God To Help Me"

I Prayed For Help And God Sent Doctors With The Vaccine, I Said "No Thanks, I'm Waiting For God To Help Me"

ChrisMMatthews Report

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Adrian
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So, God sent doctors with vaccines which had been developed by other doctors using the brains God gave them, and you turned them all down. Wow!

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#33

Mindy Kaling Shuttin’ ‘Em Down

Mindy Kaling Shuttin’ ‘Em Down

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#34

Not Sure What Is The Objective Is Here?

Not Sure What Is The Objective Is Here?

BelleAriel Report

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Trillian
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

99.9% of the people claiming something is "socialism" don't have any idea what socialism means

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#35

Nasa Is Untrustworthy

Nasa Is Untrustworthy

EstablishmentEast922 Report

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Nandina
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ignorance is the absence of knowledge. Stupidity is the presence of knowledge and the refusal to use it. Paul Coelho

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#36

It Really Is The Churches Motto Tho

It Really Is The Churches Motto Tho

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GoodWolf
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Really? A pastor saying "show up acting stupid and find out if we have guns"?? WTF and I'm not even religious

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#37

The Real Deal

The Real Deal

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River Webb
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

even if he stays out of the emergency room (which he should) he'll still impact others, either by transmitting the disease to the vulnerable or to spread misinformation.

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#38

She Seems So Dumb

She Seems So Dumb

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River Webb
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'll pay 38 dollars for a burrito if it means someone is able to pay their bills

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#39

Why Do Some People Want Others To Have It Bad Cruz They Had ? Hope This Isn't Already Here

Why Do Some People Want Others To Have It Bad Cruz They Had ? Hope This Isn't Already Here

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River Webb
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

why is there such a big obsession with the military, I mean killing others or getting yourself killed is hardly a good thing

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#40

I'm Not A Gamer For Nothing

I'm Not A Gamer For Nothing

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#41

Look I Made A Joke

Look I Made A Joke

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River Webb
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

you can't spell stupid without u, except this probably isn't a coincidence

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#42

Does Jlo Have A Reply To That?

Does Jlo Have A Reply To That?

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#43

In 1919 And 1920, At The Very Start Of His Career, Tolkien Worked On The Staff Of The Oxford English Dictionary; He Later Said Of This Time That He “.. Learned More In Those Two Years Than In Any Other Equal Period Of My Life”

In 1919 And 1920, At The Very Start Of His Career, Tolkien Worked On The Staff Of The Oxford English Dictionary; He Later Said Of This Time That He “.. Learned More In Those Two Years Than In Any Other Equal Period Of My Life”

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#44

It Works Both Ways!

It Works Both Ways!

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River Webb
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

honestly pack your bags and leave, save your husband the trouble

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#45

He Wants The Ring Please

He Wants The Ring Please

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#46

Don’t Mistake Empathy For Weaknesses

Don’t Mistake Empathy For Weaknesses

BelleAriel Report

#47

Getting Schooled

Getting Schooled

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River Webb
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

how do people who barely managed a high school degree get into parliament?

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#49

State Representative Got Owned!

State Representative Got Owned!

DeFoerest Report

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Tamra Stiffler
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It disgusts me to my core when adults use children to further their political or personal ideology.

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#50

We Need No Masks Because Viruses Are Not Real

We Need No Masks Because Viruses Are Not Real

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#51

Not Sure If This Has Been Posted Here Yet, Sorry If It Has Been

Not Sure If This Has Been Posted Here Yet, Sorry If It Has Been

The_Great_Pancake Report

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Susie Elle
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand how forcing existing characters to be queer is a sign of inclusion. To me that's like making a Jane Bond and giving yourself a pat on the shoulder for being so inclusive.

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