Having lived in this world for almost a quarter-century, I can tell that life is much more absurd than our parents and teachers tell us. Sometimes all you can do is laugh at bizarre situations.

It looks like the Tumblr blog Absurd Life Quote shares the same sentiment. Check out these ridiculously funny one-liners and tell us which ones you can identify with!

More info: Tumblr (h/t: designtaxi)

#1

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JuliaLyga
Community Member
5 years ago

Ha

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#2

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JoshBungitak
Community Member
5 years ago

That and having a maid named mom....missing her nightly cooking

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#3

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TinyDynamine
Community Member
5 years ago

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Only sad losers can relate to this.

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#4

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AlisonIrvine
Community Member
5 years ago

i agree with this one, not remotely photogenic, me!

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#5

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ShannynSletcher
Community Member
5 years ago

You have two!?! Damn it!

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#6

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Libesch
Community Member
5 years ago

¡Muy bueno!

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#7

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Libesch
Community Member
5 years ago

Totalmente de acuerdo, siempre que se pueda se debe hacer.

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#8

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JohnBanister
Community Member
5 years ago

Your secret is safe with me, I've forgotten it already. It's the best thing I know to do when people tell me things they want kept secret.

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#9

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Libesch
Community Member
5 years ago

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No. No soy anoréxica. Soy normal. Como medido, pero como.

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#10

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Queenluxa
Community Member
5 years ago

..me...

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#11

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fredericeeckman
Community Member
5 years ago

Or you call back immediately while they are trying to call you back again, so you just have to deal with the answering machine. But you have the feeling you HAVE to be the one who will reach the other one first :D

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ShenenehJ.
Community Member
5 years ago

Not yet

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#13

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MartieChildress
Community Member
5 years ago

Perfect.

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#14

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BethIbarra
Community Member
5 years ago

This is my mantra!

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#15

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JuliaLyga
Community Member
5 years ago

Haha this is great... Maybe in a couple years.. Rn I'm good with cheetos and Netflix...

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#16

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LusiaJahaubun
Community Member
5 years ago

seems like we are same for this point :D

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#17

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TinyDynamine
Community Member
5 years ago

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No you don't. Ever.

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#18

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VanTran
Community Member
5 years ago

Love it !

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#19

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JPolaczyk
Community Member
5 years ago

<3

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#20

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SusannaVesna
Community Member
5 years ago

LMAO

#21

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LoriLamb
Community Member
5 years ago

Or "Eye of the Tiger."

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#22

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TinyDynamine
Community Member
5 years ago

Exercise*

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#23

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LeopardHorse56
Community Member
5 years ago

Too bad they all say princess or superhero! Lol

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#24

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Lorien
Community Member
5 years ago

Me exactly

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#25

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fredericeeckman
Community Member
5 years ago

No one gives a shit.

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#26

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Wulfur
Community Member
5 years ago

I totally agree

#27

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ManuSchuster
Community Member
5 years ago

Remember #26

#28

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DesireeLoewens
Community Member
5 years ago

My life exactly.

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AmyWeiss
Community Member
5 years ago

Then again, no one's coming at me with a sword that's better than my sword in real life, either...

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#30

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LilyQuinn
Community Member
5 years ago

Ggihrvbkojrresdfghkl alchahol mutates your internal organs. Getting overly drunk takes months even years off of your life....

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#31

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Novel&Peace
Community Member
1 month ago

Me...

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Llamas and Squids
Community Member
4 years ago

me too

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Nick Douglas
Community Member
4 years ago

the first part was the most absurd. girl logic... where

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#38

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CathyBinder
Community Member
4 years ago

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stolen from twitter

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CHRISTOPHER HOGAN
Community Member
3 years ago

true

#40

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MauFerrusca
Community Member
5 years ago

This one is spot on!

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LouVarner
Community Member
5 years ago

omg my ex use to say this

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#42

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Sidney Kozlowski
Community Member
4 years ago

#25

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Lorien
Community Member
5 years ago

Not me! Lol

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#44

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Pi
Community Member
5 years ago

Your tears ARE precious currency.....to the right banker. :)

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CHRISTOPHER HOGAN
Community Member
3 years ago

yes

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De'Vious Mitchell
Community Member
2 months ago

why do peo- that one is so true

#49

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De'Vious Mitchell
Community Member
2 months ago

🤣🤣🤣True people need to do that🤣🤣🤣

#50

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Pi
Community Member
5 years ago

Ah....the modern day Ouroboros.

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#51

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Pi
Community Member
5 years ago

Maybe he has a secret identity we don't know of?

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#52

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VictoriaReyPiuma
Community Member
5 years ago

Yep!

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#53

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De'Vious Mitchell
Community Member
2 months ago

I know like this is my food 🤣🤣

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Ruth
Community Member
3 years ago

Omgosh yes😂😂

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#59

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SquishCupcake
Community Member
5 years ago

Ikr so true

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Adam Rindegård
Community Member
7 months ago

omg so true

#62

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Ruth
Community Member
3 years ago

I lov😂😂

#63

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