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Women are agents of chaos… In between working, cooking, cleaning, raising kids, looking good and tackling all the other things on their plates, many still find time to create a little drama when life gets boring. Often, at the expense of the men in their lives.
Whether it’s a casual quip like, “Do you ever wish you were more athletic?” or deliberately infuriating them by playing dumb about finances, ladies are digging deep in their arsenal to find ways to rage-bait men. Just to sit back and watch the male ego short-circuit and the alpha brain do back-flips.
Someone recently asked, "What's something you've said to a man that's absolutely rage bait and has never failed to piss them off?" and the internet went wilder than a guy who has just fallen for the bait. Thousands of women revealed their go-to methods for provoking men and sending them into a complete spiral.
Bored Panda has compiled a list of the best answers for you to scroll through while you plot out your next deliberate argument. Some are funny, others not so much. All are tried-and-tested triggers that these girls swear by for a quick win.
We also unpack whether rage-baiting is harmful or fair game, and what to do when you're on the receiving end of the hook. You'll find that info between the images.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
When men used to tell me I looked better when I didn’t wear my glasses, I’d respond with 'You also look better when I don't wear my glasses.'
Zoe Vokes 4 months ago
Depends on the glasses. If they suit your face they look good. If they look like Dame Edna Everage‘s glasses then they might be a bit much for daywear.
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Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
Glasses draw attention to the eyes and the eyes are the sexiest part of a woman's body for me.
BeesEelsAndPups 4 months ago
This would make me laugh if said to me. I would never say that to somebody though.
RamiRudolph 4 months ago
Yeah, great response. So funny. First time I heard it, I laughed so hard I fell out of my stroller.
Rage-baiting is the deliberate act of posting, saying, or doing something provocative with the specific intention of triggering an emotional reaction—usually anger, outrage, or frustration. That's the definition given by New York-based mental health experts, On Par Therapy.
"Think of it as emotional fishing, but instead of using worms, manipulators use your triggers as bait," explains the site.
And while social media is awash with girlfriends and wives rage-baiting their men for laughs, likes and shares, the experts warn that this manipulation tactic isn't always as funny as it seems.
RELATED:
#2
I have a work colleague who is the most misogynistic guy I've ever met. One day, while he was giving one of his misinformed speeches about women, we started to argue... When he got emotional, I asked him if he was on his period.
He didn't speak to me for a week.
Jemima Bauer 4 months ago
Misogynist doesn’t want to talk to me? Don’t threaten me with a good time.
Upstaged75 4 months ago
I worked with an obnoxious Russian guy who nearly had an aneurism when he saw me using a screwdriver to hang something on the wall. He thought he was complimenting me by being so impressed I could use tools. 🙄 He went on about it ALL day. Misogynistic little pr!ck.
setsuriseikou 4 months ago
On behalf of our men, I'm so sorry, please don't think they're all like this. We do have men who genuinely think women are people.
Load More Replies... Evelien Stijger Martens 4 months ago
I was once called a castrating person by a male prychiatrist. I guess because i din't get i.pressed easily and it says .ore about him than me.
Michael Largey 4 months ago (edited)
Repeat question weekly. And text it when he's on vacation just to be sure.
Gracie Mae 4 months ago
had a boyfriend break up with me because his friend & i got into a tiny argument; he asked if i was 'on the rag' & i snapped back 'no, but rest assured that you'll be the first to know when I am.' weird...
#3
when they tell you to smile more reply back with "you first" and when they smile say "good boy" and walk away.
FranSinclair 4 months ago (edited)
I dont make a habit out of s**t talking all men but as a bartender there are definitely men i have talked s**t at (women as well and this works for them too) but if i say something and have to ask myself "are they gonna hit me?" I grin, wink and walk away. Then they are left wondering if i was hitting on them while i decide on my next steps lol. People get so fkn confused. Another is when someones not being nice to me i say "my god you're awful but atleast you have your looks to fall back on, i guess"
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
Do men still say that? It's like the most overused pickup line since "Hey Adam! Try This fruit I found!?"
V 4 months ago
I had a charity fundraiser say that to me as I was walking to my first shift back to work after my mother's funeral. Yes, I was tempted to risk an a*****t charge.
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JayWantsACat 4 months ago
In the show Broad City, when the two leads get told to smile more they use the middle fingers on each hand to push up the corners of their mouths into a smile. See it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWRzGEKiB2M
Little_Disaster 1 month ago
I usually answer "Above a certain age I am not obligated to smile at a clown anymore". That usually does the trick.
In relationships, rage-baiting might include making deliberately hurtful comments during arguments, bringing up past mistakes at inappropriate times, using passive-aggressive behavior to provoke reactions, or playing the victim after intentionally pushing boundaries.
On Par Therapy's experts say that people engage in rage-baiting for various reasons. Some do it for control and power. "Manipulating others' emotions provides a sense of dominance," notes the site. Others rage-bait as a method of avoidance. Basically, they distract from their own issues by creating drama elsewhere.
There are those who lean on it as a form of emotional regulation, using others' reactions to manage their own internal chaos. While many are rage-baiting experts purely for entertainment or because they genuinely enjoy watching others get upset.
Then, of course, some rage-baiters are after attention and validation. "Negative attention still counts as attention," say On Par's therapists.
#4
We were rafting and a man was trying to make fun of his wife for forgetting to pack his water shoes and I was like, wow that’s embarrassing you don’t know how to pack shoes and need your wife to do it for you. She laughed, he did not.
Upstaged75 4 months ago
Is he a child? That's ridiculous to expect your wife to pack for you. My parents have been married for 55 years and my mom has NEVER packed anything for my dad. Because he's a grown man.
CP 4 months ago
They could have divided up packing responsibilities and the wife was in charge of the shoes. It isn't all that crazy for partners to rely on each other for things like that. Still a good joke though!
Load More Replies... FranSinclair 4 months ago (edited)
Im so glad my husband is a man and not a baby. I can guarantee that if my husband said something like this *hed be joking* but myself and everyone of our children would let em have it "awe pooor baby daddy!" "Big dawgs having big feelings" "🤡 waaaa" "mommy help me i fogot my shoeies!" my sons would be leading the pack 🤣
Moana Manana 4 months ago
I walk to work about 5km (ca 3 miles) every day. I have to pack some stuff to change and shower at work. Sometimes I forget something and ask my husband to bring it, since he works in the same company and clocks in last minute... One day I forgot my shoes, and my running shoes didn't fit with my dress, so I asked my husband to bring me one pair, and he forgot. Later we were talking with some friends and mention that I had to walk around with my security shoes and a cute black dress (that was funny) and the friend said: and you were not mad at him?? I would be furios... I looked a little buffled and said that I forgot them in first place and I am the one who needs them. Ok, I was a little disappointed but definitetly not his fault. We have to owe our mistakes before we judge others. Spouse included 😋
JayWantsACat 4 months ago
The only way I could see this going that guy's way is if the wife SAID she packed them or promised to pack them or whatever. Obviously that's not the case here. The guy is manchild.
Auntriarch 4 months ago
Mr Auntriarch does the packing, but I put everything on the bed that I want to take. Works for us.
Earonn - 3 months ago
I also strongly suspect that you wouldn't blame Mr Auntriarch if you forgot anything.
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We ride at dawn biatches 4 months ago
I never pack for my husband and he doesn't expect me to either
Fire Singer 4 months ago
My husband does like to ask me if I've packed certain things, as he is packing for himself, because I tend to overpack and will sometimes grab things without thinking, but I specifically try not to pack anything that is just his. When I tell him I haven't packed something he jokingly says "what? You didn't pack X for me? You expect me to be an adult and pack for myself?" LOL!
#5
I was wearing a NY hat and he said “quick name 5 players on that team” l said “quick name 5 women that feel safe around you”.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
I can't name five women who don't around me. I also can't name five players on any sportsball team.
Black Cat 4 months ago
Don't know why you're being marked down for that comment.
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Vinnie 4 months ago
D**n gatekeeping. I lost my woman card because I could only name 2 brands of tampons.
Ravioli 3 months ago
I could basically be a fan of nothing, under absolutely no memory
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Chris Angleberger 4 months ago
I’m just annoyed that there was no team mentioned. NY? NY what?
#6
My ex husband called me a "_" (fill in the blank) laughed and told him I'd been called worse. He said what. I said his wife.
Vinnie 4 months ago
In a happy marriage, that would be banter or a private joke. In this case, I suspect he's an ex for a reason.
Michael Largey 4 months ago
People are always exes for a reason. (Not always a good one, but a reason.)
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Two Cat Studio 4 months ago
On time my late husband (s*****e) told me I was stupid. I fired back, "You married me ... so what does that make you?" It shut him up for at least a day.
"When people rage-bait in relationships, they're looking for reassurance," says psychologist Dr. Kavya Deshmukh. "By annoying or provoking their partner, they test whether the other person still cares enough to react. It's dysfunctional, but it's also oddly intimate."
However, rage-baiting can become harmful. "If every interaction is built on provocation, intimacy gets replaced with irritation," explains clinical therapist Ritu Anand. "Over time, it stops feeling playful and starts feeling manipulative."
#7
He told me that women should stay home and look after the kids. I told him, 'Your salary and status in life should match that.' Silence.
Tabitha 4 months ago (edited)
I once had a guy who made less salary than me accuse me, in front of friends, of only being after his money. I told old Diamond Jim, in front of those same friends, that I made more than him, and if he’s got a big pile of money hidden somewhere, he needs to show it to not only me but also all our friends right here before any of us would believe him. His d**k went immediately limp after that. I also broke up with him on the spot. Even worse for him, I stayed friends with the friends who witnessed his empty boast, while they pretty much drifted away from him.
#8
A boss told me I'd look better with make up on. I told him he'd look better with hair. He just walked away and never brought it up again. Mind you I was 21, tan, fit, and living in Huntington Beach.
Kakashisith 4 months ago
I was told, that I looked better, if I sunbathed. Asked them, would they pay the medication, when I get melanoma. Silence. Mission accomplished.
veveve 4 months ago
ouch! thats a good one. I've been told that I was big/fat, by another big/fat person.
Fire Singer 4 months ago
As another big/fat person myself I never understood why anyone says this to someone. Like...do you think I am unaware that I'm fat? It's not the insult they want it to be because I'm well aware I'm no skinny mini. But especially to be told that from another big/fat person is just weird isn't it?
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Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
Huntington Beach is a racist hellhole full of racist old white people who can't die soon enough.
Alexandra 4 months ago
Ouch. My uncle lives there and yes, he did nearly die of a heart-attack. Personally, I haven't met him for more than 30 years because he emigrated a long time ago so I don't know about the demographics of particular areas in the USA....
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Seadog 4 months ago
Personally I hate make-up and I hate lipstick even more, especially bright red. I've never seen any woman who looks good with red lipstick.
Hyacinth (Any pronouns) 1 month ago
So don't wear makeup or lipstick, it's not a big deal.
Load More Replies... #9
Whenever (an old man) asks why they sent a female on the ambulance I always tell them they’ve always relied on a woman to take care of them, why change the status quo now?
Shark Lady 4 months ago
Of all the times I have needed ambulance, I have never given it a moment's thought about which flavour of paramedic might appear.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
This. Same for nurses who happen to be men, doctors or dentists who happen to be women. TL;DR: I don’t care what gender anybody is, if they’re good at what I need done.
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Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
I don’t give a dam who they send lol ,if we need an ambulance makes no odds be it male or female,or any of the pronouns in between,a paramedic is a paramedic no matter what gender , or skin colour 🤷♀️bloody nice put down to him lol ,
If you're the victim of rage-baiting, whether by strangers online or in close relationships, the best thing you can do is not take the bait. But that's easier said than done.
"When you feel that familiar surge of anger from a provocative post or comment, literally pause. Notice the physical sensations, the urge to respond immediately, and the thoughts racing through your mind," advises On Par Therapy. "This moment of awareness is your power."
The next step is to A-C-C-E-P-T. But that's not what you might think it means...
#10
When an ex started a fight for no reason, I held my finger up, said, 'Wait a second,' walked away, and came back with a blanket. I placed it on his shoulders and told him, 'Now, you're super mad.'
I've never seen a man go red SO fast.
BeesEelsAndPups 4 months ago
OMG. If my girlfriend did that to me I'd laugh my a*s off. That's just hilarious. Next time I get mad at somebody I'm doing this to myself. "Look what you did, now I'm super mad"
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
Last fight I had with my exgf she threatened me with a knife and I almost lost two toes. NEVER dating a Russian again. I had to get a restraining order after she started stalking me. I'd take this de escalation any day.
MushroomHead22 4 months ago
this is just an old joke that has been circulating on the internet for many years.
#11
"if you can't drop your weights quietly then maybe they're too heavy for you" always sends them into a rage. But also, stop throwing your GD weights.
Arabiata Arabiata 4 months ago
But it's so masculine to drop the weights and look around so that you can see, I'm so strong and uber-alpha. /s
Grace Sssssss 4 months ago
AMEN. You build more quality muscle with a controlled return! But it's not quality they're looking for, just appearance.
Serena Myers 4 months ago
A 6kg cat (0.945 stone) is quite enough for me to carry for more than a few feet. I think he'd object if I tried to use him for weight training /s
Gracie Mae 4 months ago
read one like this one time about guys not putting their weights back on the stand--the note said something to the effect of "If you're having trouble putting your weights away, contact one of the women at the desk; they'll be happy to do it for you"
#12
Referring to their lifted pick-up truck as “gender affirming care.”
Saltypepper 4 months ago
That's what i say the bigger the truck ..the smaller they are
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Learner Panda 4 months ago
I call them compensation vehicles. Guess for what they are compensating?
Michael Largey 4 months ago
Sounds life self awareness or irony, maybe both. But welcome in either case.
Dave In MD 4 months ago
If you are making that comment just because they have a lifted truck then that makes you the a*****e. If it is in response to some comment then it would be a different thing.
Auntriarch 4 months ago
True. Most of these should only be used when someone deserves it.
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SummerVeE 4 months ago
This can't be a real thing... Right? I would never be able to keep a straight face around a guy who talks like this
Meowzers! 4 months ago
The list is what women have said to men. So this is a woman calling out a man with a lifted pick-up by calling it his gender affirming care truck.
Load More Replies...On Par Therapy suggests a technique known as ACCEPTS when dealing with rage-baiting.
The "A" stands for activities. Do something engaging that keeps your mind occupied or distracts you.
The "C" is for contributing or helping someone else.
The second "C" encourages you to compare this to another situation. To think of a time you handled something similar well.
#13
Refer to their job as a "male" job..."this is Jason, he's a male engineer."
Michael Largey 4 months ago
If a tree surgeon is someone who only treats trees, then a female doctor should be someone only treats females, like a gynecologist.
BeesEelsAndPups 4 months ago
Do people say female engineer though? I do understand though people saying "he's a male football player" or referring to the tournament as the Men's World Cup
Lila Allen 4 months ago
Constantly. I have a friend who is a bioengineer and she is continuously referred to as " the female engineer" in every company she's worked with.
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David McKendrick 4 months ago
I used to be a nurse. My insurance agent tried writing on a form "male nurse" until I pointed out that "male" was somewhere else on the form.
Earonn - 3 months ago
Then they stop for a moment because it's unusual. And hopefully realise how stupid it is to refer to someone as a "female engineer".
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qvjtfrzdxm 3 months ago (edited)
I always do that with musicians. “ie: “Paul McCartney is a great male bass player.” Lol
#14
I had a random dude being condescing about my German shepherd being “a lot of dog” for me. My highly titled, nationally placed GSD that I bred and trained myself. I said, “well they do need a handler that’s a clear and consistent communicator, so they actually do amazing with women.”
Nikki Sevven 4 months ago
@Anirisi, no. Not all women are passive-aggressive non-communicators. If you ask me what's wrong, I will tell you in excruciating detail.
Bur* 4 months ago
I was going to let him know that sounds like a them problem, not a woman problem. I can't comment on their's though
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Laserleader 4 months ago (edited)
Had a guy ask why I called myself a "professional driver" during a disagreement. Considering I was referring to a delivery I had just completed, for my delivery company, that I had taken from my logo covered vehicle (a two year old established business that had won Entrepreneur of the Year 2022 locally, with about 4,500 annual deliveries under my belt), I kinda felt I was a professional.
Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
Well if you drive for a living ie lorry n the likes here in uk you are called a professional driver, it is a real thing , more so if after like 40 ish yrs of driving u still have a clean licence lol and can drive artics . So yup its your job , ergo you are a professional driver !!
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#15
I’m 6’1” and men in public will gaggle at me like I’m a circus animal. They’ll ask me how tall I am and I’ll say something completely wrong like 5’8” and slowly watch their confusion turn to anger as they reevaluate their own height.
Frunkadunk 4 months ago
I'm 5'11" and a guy once told me I made him feel like a m*dg*t. I said, I thought y'all preferred 'little people'. He actually laughed and high fived me. 🤣 That short dude had a pretty attitude.
Bartlet for world domination 4 months ago
1.85 m for the imperially challenged. Come look around over here (Amsterdam) where 6'2" is average.
Jan Willem ten Dam 4 months ago
6’1” does not seem special for woman in Amsterdam, but I think the average is closer to 5’7” than 6’2”.
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Caroline Overill 4 months ago
I am 5ft 11 female and I swear this has happened to me several times different guys. I will be walking down the street when I am aware of a man walking behind me. He is shorter than me and he speeds up his walk because a man can’t possibly walk slower than a woman. So I speed up. We end up walking down the street like a scene from a silent movie!
MushroomHead22 4 months ago
if they start reevaluating their height, then they must be pretty stupid.
Seadog 4 months ago
Where do you live that 6'1 would attract that much attention? Lilliput? I see multiple people taller than that every day.
Squirrel Chaser 4 months ago
Where do you live that has that many women over 6'1"? (1.85m)
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"E" is for emotions. Move from anger to humor or calm by watching a funny video or listening to music.
Then "P": Push away. Or mentally put the situation in a box for later.
"T" stands for thoughts. Redirect them by counting backwards, doing a puzzle, singing, etc.
And finally, focus on "S" for sensations. Hold ice, take a hot or cold shower. Feel something...
"The goal isn't to never feel angry—it's to feel it without being controlled by it," notes the site.
#16
Halfway through them mansplaining I say “it’s fine if you don’t know, I’ll just google it.”
BeesEelsAndPups 4 months ago
This is funny. I'm a mansplainer. I just get too excited to talk about stuff. I do it to men too. I would laugh at this and shut right up.
detective miller's hat 4 months ago
I don't think that makes you a mansplainer, just enthusiastic. Mansplaining always sounds condescending.
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Jan Willem ten Dam 4 months ago
Halfway through my mansplaining, I will google to double-check some obscurities I also want to tell you about…
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
That sounds more like infodumping. If you do that with everybody (not just women), then it’s not mansplaining.
Load More Replies... Seadog 4 months ago
I worked in auto parts for 13+ years. I'd much rather assist a woman. Why? Because if a woman doesn't know what she needs or what something is she'll ask me to come out and look at the part on the car and listen when I tell her what it is and what it does and why it may or may not be the cause of her trouble. Guys on the other hand make up names for stuff, argue about it when I tell them what it is and does. I've even seen guys argue with me, mechanics and even their own friends when we all tell them that (that part) is not your problem, (this part) is your problem. In all those years, I only had 1 woman refuse to listen and I think it was really just a matter of she got a cheaper part somewhere else and didn't want to say that.
Igor Manzoni 1 month ago
If I was the man I would respond: "As expected" and go on with my day.
Oerff On Tour 4 months ago
Mansplaining? You mean telling someone something the way your momma taught you how to explain something?
#17
A man once told me that drinking wasn't 'cute.' I told him I wasn't trying to be cute, I was trying to be drunk, so being around him would be more enjoyable.
Grumpy old man 4 months ago
Hemingway. Me too. Some people really are only tolerable after a drink
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 4 months ago
Woman: "Why are you spending money on beer?" Man: "You spend money on make up." Woman: "The make up is so I'll look pretty to you." Man: "That's what the beer is for, too."
Michael Largey 4 months ago
“The whole world is three drinks behind. If everybody in the world would take three drinks, we would have no trouble.” - Humphrey Bogart
#18
“Let’s talk about this when you’re less emotional”
BeesEelsAndPups 4 months ago
Huh. I say something similar to my kids. Do you need to be alone for a while before we talk about this?
Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
I hate that condescending comment I’d also never say it to my kids ever , it’s patronising ,also the calm down 😡loath that saying , guaranteed to wind some one up more ,
#19
If a man ever ask what you bring to the table respond with “what are you lacking that you need a woman to provide for you.” F**king devastates them.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
It's a date not a business negotiation! I've been hearing about these "transactional" relationships a bit here and there. Not interested. Not the kind of dating I'm into and not the kind of friendship I'm into.
FranSinclair 4 months ago (edited)
Coming into a relationship, i think you should have your own fully set table. Both parties. If i were to ask someone i was interested in about things like work, car or income it wouldnt be bc i want or need something they have but bc as an adult with children i do not want to have to support another adult. I also think income matters atleast some so ways of life can align. Like if i like to take multiple cruises a year, id want someone with those interests and financial ability for THEMSELVES. I understand that most people chose to combine tables in partnerships but if it fails...you still have your full table. I married my middle school sweetheart at 17 though so i probably dont get much of an opinion on this
Melinda Streeter 4 months ago
I HATE that question so I spell it out for them. A job, a car and their own living situation worked out. No, I’m not picking you up. No, I’m not letting you move in with me. No, I’m not loaning you money! Weeds out about 80% of men right there
Soul Lessons 1 week ago
Boys here's the comeback, I am not lacking anything and can buy your entire family property, just asking if you can provide equality in a relationship or you are just here with no life skill, to sleep and avoiding responsibilities. My dog do that so I don't need another dog in the house
robert erickson 4 months ago
I see the "Table" question being talked about on youtube quite a bit and I believe guys are seeing that question being answered with "I AM the table" from women. It's not a good situation from either side. Looks like too much social media being consumed.
#20
Told an opinionated coworker “I’m not taking advice from a guy who looks like he owes his grandma money.” Dude flipped his 💩. Mission accomplished.
RomanceRadish 4 months ago
"You look like you eat candy corn"... was the best one I've heard online all week.
Michael Largey 4 months ago
But what if you needed advice about how to get money out of your grandma?
#21
When he says he's an "alpha" male, I respond, "So, Team Jacob?" They never fail to crash out. Or, if they have a wolf tattoo, I always tell them that I love their Twilight tattoo.
BrunoVI 4 months ago
OK, that's funny, but I barely know "team Jacob," would alpha males even get it? (I presume the point is to subtly accuse them of knowing girl fantasy books? Or is there something particularly insulting about team Jacob? And I'm not trying to act too alpha male to understand; I'm team Buffy, in fact.)
Upstaged75 4 months ago
Yes, you got the point - Twilight is NOT a manly thing to like if you're an "alpha". 😂
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Jeff Christensen 4 months ago
In subatomic physics, an alpha particle is so weak it can barely penetrative a piece of paper.
Oerff On Tour 4 months ago
I overheard a guy saying he was an "alpha male". I just butted in and said "Oh,really? I'm a Toyota male." Next he was mimicking a fish
Grape Walls of Ire 4 months ago
Once I learned that whole series is based on the Mormon belief system, I lost interest.
Farah (she/her) 4 months ago
Sometimes I ask if they mean like they're immature, not developed completely yet (programmer language lol)
BeesEelsAndPups 4 months ago
I don't know what this means, but from the comments it has to do with Twilight. I'm not one to describe myself as Alpha, but I wouldn't get this joke in a normal context either.
Lila Allen 4 months ago
Basically Twilight is seen as a super girly movie and identifying as Team Edward or Team Jacob is only for adolescent girls. Jacob is a werwolf so saying "alpha" must be team Jacob implies alpha males are really adolescent girls.
Load More Replies... Tea Drinker 1 day ago
Alpha male? So, like, still being bug-tested and not ready to be released to the public?
Gracie Mae 4 months ago
never saw the twilight stuff, still thought this was funny! but doesn't everyone of that era at least know of the reference?
Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
I have two wolf tattoos lol ,my spirit animal ,tons of pics n tapestry’s n dream catchers with them on in my bedroom to ,n I assure u its f all to do with twilight 😂I had the pics etc LONG before that even got written 😂
#22
I was mowing the lawn when an older man yelled at me because, in order to mow the edge, I had to drive on the street for about two seconds. (Yes, I looked first, but he was flying around a turn). He told my husband that he should be mowing. I looked at him and said, 'My husband just gave himself a manicure (he had just finished cutting his nails), and doesn't want to ruin it.'
They both scowled at me. It was a two-for-one.
Celtic Pirate Queen 4 months ago
I walked into my Dad's office one time and he was not only getting a manicure, his barber was cutting his hair. My Dad was just about the manliest man I've ever known.
robert erickson 4 months ago
Sounds like he was the boss and just saving time. Sounds like a great Dad.
Load More Replies... Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
Actually I’d have stopped what I was doing ,n handed him the mower ,n said ok smart a**e you ,bloody do it , if your so dam perfect ,n walked off , I’ve no time for c**p like this now it’s condescending totally , ,
#23
I wear hearing aids in both ears. Once during an argument I took them out, laid them on the counter and said I don’t want to hear what you have to say anymore and walked away.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
My dad takes his hearing aids out around people who annoy him. 😏
Farah (she/her) 4 months ago
I have a family friend thats five and whenever her parents are yelling at her she just takes them out lol
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Gen X Feral 4 months ago
😂🤣😂 Boy I wish I could do this when my husband starts blathering on about some stupid video game. I literally couldn't gaf if you got Scooter to level 9, go away
robert erickson 4 months ago
But is he a pothead or drunk or a woman chaser?
Load More Replies... #24
I work with "an alpha" and every day I tell him I like his top (polo) or his blouse (button down). He ducks when he sees me coming but I always make a point of walking down his aisle to compliment him.
Lila Allen 4 months ago
Yeah but they also call a hat a cover. So I am not sure they're very reliable in the naming objects category
Load More Replies... Tabitha 4 months ago (edited)
My my, such “alpha” behavior to duck and avoid a woman because you can’t handle her comebacks to his insults that are much quicker and more clever than he has the brainpower to ever keep up with. Thing is, “alphas” are supposed to be smarter and quicker than everyone else. The other thing is, the concept of the “alpha”, which came from studies of wolfpacks, has been completely debunked. It has been discovered that the alpha pair—-a male wolf AND a female wolf—-changes as each pair of wolves starts mating. When they’re done, the next pair takes over. No one wolf is a permanent “alpha”.
Fire Singer 4 months ago
OMG! I accidentally did this to my dad once. I told him I liked his top and he got all flustered and irritated and said "Men don't have tops! They have shirts!" I just rolled my eyes and said "Ok dad, never mind then, I don't like your top any more." He still has some learning to do for this century. ;)
Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
U not in uk ? Here they are tops ,unless they are actually shirts lol ie the kind you wear ties with them be shirts rest are t shirts or tops 🤷♀️have been in all my 6 decades on the planet lol
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Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
If he’s an incel or alpha n ,that’s never gonna happen , they ain’t smart enough to understand ,
Load More Replies... #25
I had a customer tell me “not to get smart” with them, I said “but how would you know” *click
#26
Easy. Stare at their hair while they’re talking. Then just say “did they mean to cut your hair like that?”
Marcos Zapatero 4 months ago
"I used to get haircuts like that as a punishment, soooooo, what did you do this time?"
#27
"Damn that's a lot of anger. You should get your hormones checked."
Jerusalem Cat Syndrome 1 week ago
No, the OP's version works much better.
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Lady Chelsea (LadyChelseaoftheVoid) 4 months ago
"you should get your hormones checked. moodiness is often a sign of low testosterone."
Uncle Schmickle 4 months ago
I once told an angry guy he should attend a Buddhist centre for some inner peace.
#28
If he’s getting in your face say “imma need you to be like your hairline and take a few steps back.”
Grape Walls of Ire 4 months ago
Ok, I'm getting tired of the assumption that pointing out a guy's baldness is somehow an insult.
Ace 4 months ago
If some men are still sensitive about it then it clearly works as such. Not nice, but then that's kinda what an insult is all about.
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Dan Holden 4 months ago
And if that guy responded by pointing out something "wrong" with a part of her anatomy that she can't control, that would be ok too right?/s
#29
When they approach me for my number I tell them I don't have any cash or spare change. Shocked, hurt, confusion, and they leave me alone.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
TBH does anyone really walk up to a complete stranger and ask for their number? Is that really a thing that ever happens? I really hope it doesn't
Spidercat 4 months ago
Not these days but some of us remember a world before the interweb, when people used to meet and talk and exchange numbers.
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NapQueen 4 months ago (edited)
Is it a crime though to ask for your number? All you have to do is say 'no thank you,' and if they're respectful they'll leave you in peace. I'm all about putting people in their place, but I don't purposefully hurt somebody's feelings if they have true intentions.
SPV 4 months ago
Most women are quite used to men getting angry when turned down, especially the kind of man that would hit on a total stranger in a random situation like a bus stop etc. Most guys are bigger and stronger than most women so they cannot really easily empathise as for them being hit on is nice even if they are not interested. If they were constantly hit on by massive muscular truckers who wouldn't take no for an answer and tended to physically corner them and pester without reacting to a clear discomfort it would be easier for them to understand why women tend to overreact + get pissed at the "not all men" rhetoric. We know that "not all men" and not even most men, doesn't matter, enough men.
Load More Replies... Wang Zhuang 4 months ago (edited)
I mean...if a guy sees a woman on the street that he finds attractive and wants to shoot his shot, I don't see the harm as long he's respectful. Are people only supposed to use the internet to meet a potential partner these days? Edit: This is assuming, by the way, that the guy actually tries to have dialogue with the woman BEFORE simply asking for her number
Lila Allen 4 months ago
Yes I think it's the how. If the guy comes up, talks to you for a while and you're having a great conversation then absolutely ask for contact info. But to just walk up and ask is very off putting for women. A total stranger you've never spoken to is not the person you want having your contact details.
Load More Replies... Oerff On Tour 4 months ago
My number is 3. You don't even have to tell me, as I already have your number...
MushroomHead22 4 months ago
"Shocked, hurt, confusion, and they leave me alone." Shocked? most likely not. hurt? lol confused? yes. leave you alone? absolutely... the lies are funny here
#30
I work in construction, and my favorite thing to do when a guy is crashing out on-site is to ask him, 'You're having some big feelings today, huh?' It works every time.
Suki 4 months ago
Ace - 'crashing out' usually means an overly emotional outburst, aka temper tantrum.
tori Ohno 4 months ago
It means sleeping on your friend's couch because you can't make it home where I'm from
Load More Replies... FranSinclair 4 months ago
I used to work in a male dominated field. Im small in stature but most of these men were above average size. Theyd get cranky and start going back and forth with eachother and if they even tried to come at me id say *finger in face* "dont you dare! Ive taken down bigger men for less!" I most definitely have not but the fierceness in which I say it certainly had them wondering.
#31
Ask him what music he's into, after he's done listing only male musicians and male bands, make sure to say, 'wow you're really into boy bands.'
Michael Largey 4 months ago (edited)
A preference for male musicians may only reflect the smaller chance women are given to succeed in music. The exposure is hardly 50/50.
nottheactualphoto 4 months ago
True. Although most of the really big pop stars are women.
Load More Replies... Meowzers! 4 months ago
Surely it's dependant on the type of music they like though? It's not necessarily them just listing male artists for the sake of it. I like rock music. If I listed my preferred bands there is only 2 out of my top 10 with a single female member. That's not me being sexists to female artists, that's just my favourite bands being male.
Ravioli 3 months ago
Fermate singers make predominantly pop music, guess what I don't listen to
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Grape Walls of Ire 4 months ago
That's why I always make sure to mention Joan Tower, Sofia Gubaidalina, Wendy Carlos, Suzanne Ciani, Caroline Shaw, Carla Kihlstedt, Diamanda Galas... and then I start to get really obscure.
Lene 4 months ago
Had a guy at a metal concert ask me what music I like. So I started off with the music I liked as a kid (Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Deep Purple) and he had the most shocked face in the world, then I continued to the bands I liked as a teenager (Bloodhound Gang, Green Day, Soulfly) and his face relaxed a bit, then I went on to the bands I like now (Bloodbath, Benighted, Behemoth, Pantera, Vreid) and he suddenly looked like the happiest dude in the world. 😄😄 I guess I should have just told him the metal bands first. But I thought it would be nice of me to take him through my entire life of bands I like(d). 🤣🤣
KatSaidWhat 4 months ago
I was asked about my music taste one night at a party and my stock answer of "everything from Abba to Marilyn Manson" triggered a "white racist!" comment from a sudanese... Thankfully my mate was on hand to untangle that b******t.
Rali Meyer 4 months ago
I mostly listen to music. Without knowing who is in the band. And I love Selena Gomez like a love song
#32
A Nigerian lady in TT told her husband wisdom is chasing him, but he’s faster.
Emilu 4 months ago
I love this line. Used it a couple of times already and the receivers have always been all "...?" 😂
Ace 4 months ago
Yeah, I wouldn't have a clue what they were trying to say either.
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MushroomHead22 4 months ago
this is the only one here that is actually good. anything that would imply a man is gay, or that they are balding isnt really an insult. its more just making fun of people who are actually like that
nottheactualphoto 4 months ago
If anyone was wondering, TT is the Tourist Trophy. It's a motorcycle racing event held on the Isle of Man.
#33
This is very person specific. Co-worker is Irish and thinks he can get away with anything because of it. When he really pisses me off, I just ask “remind me what part of England are you from?” iykyk
DrBronxx 4 months ago
As an Irishman who was immature in his 20s - this works. That said, it works the same when you ask an American which part of Canada they're from, or vice versa, or when you ask a New Zealander which part of Australia they're from.
Karl 4 months ago (edited)
Only time I've encountered this (as an Irishman) was someone I worked with in England who had an Irish Grandmother, had never visited Ireland, had an English accent and yet made out that he was the most Irish person in the room and behaved like the very worst stereotypes. Very strange behaviour.
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago
Karl: "and behaved like the very worst stereotypes" - what, drunk all the time? 😉 (It's a joke: I was searching for the very worst stereotype of an Irish person.)
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Reset Game 4 months ago (edited)
If from the East Coast, ask what part of California they're from. If they're from California ask what part of Florida they're from. 😏
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
Not everybody on the east coast. I’d be delighted to be mistaken for a Californian.
Load More Replies... Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago (edited)
I'm English. I've been acquainted with quite a lot of Irish people in England (99.9% or better are just like everyone else). I don't get this. Can anyone explain? (btw, the only sorts of Irish people in England I've - umm - been in the vicinity of who made a point of acting like they could get away with anything 'cos of being Irish were scary people and I slinked out of the way. Such Irish folk in England gave "oh shít, I'm *definitely* in the wrong kind of place, I'm leaving", vibes. When it's the mid early to mid 1980s and they're collecting money for "The brotherhood" (I heard that one) you don't stop to ask which térrorist (or maybe just plain criminal) organization they're on about - you just leave. I grew in NW London. It was a thing - not a common thing, but a thing.
Load More Replies... Liz Jorgensen 4 months ago
Never ask an American what part of Canada they are from It is an insult to Canada
Al Padilla 2 months ago
When I'm asked if I'm an American, I answer, "No, I'm a New Yorker."
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KatSaidWhat 4 months ago
I'm South African, the worst insult I ever got was being called American.
#34
I gaslit a man for hours at the bar that I didn't know who Tom Brady was and when he showed me a picture I said "ohhhh Giselle's husband???" (This was when they were still together lol)
#35
I’m a bartender, and when guys hold empty glasses up at me or just gesture for something, I always say, 'Let’s use our big boy words!'"
MonsterMum 4 months ago
I would put holding up a glass down as non verbal communication and acceptable in a bar
Auntriarch 4 months ago
My friend used to be a pub landlady, and she didn't mind this gesture at all. However, if anyone tapped the glass on the bar, woe betide
Load More Replies... Meowzers! 4 months ago (edited)
That's non verbal for "same again", having worked in pubs and clubs for years I can't say i ever had a problem with some just lifting their glass to order. If anything it shows that you know how to do your job and read customers without them having to verbally explain what they want.
Michael Largey 4 months ago
If they know you well enough to recognize your signal, many servers appreciate not having to come all the way across the room and back to get your order.
Henrik Knudsen 4 months ago
Thought this was internationally recognised as a gesture for ordering the same thing at a bar. I did this all the time before i quit.
MushroomHead22 4 months ago
this sounds like your problem. its a bar. its loud. i want another beer, i raise my glass to show the bartender i need another. how about you step off your high pony and get another beer.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
If it’s loud in the bar, this might be the best way to communicate.
Tommy DePaul 2 months ago
I've done this. AND I've had bartenders look at my empty glass and raise their eyebrows to ask if I want a refill. You do know that MOST communication is nonverbal, don't you?
#36
I ask “If you were athletic, what sport would you play?”
robert erickson 4 months ago
Oh dang. In my mind, that is a good one. In real life, please tell me you carry.
#37
Once I called Travis Kelce 'Taylor Swift's boyfriend,' unironically."
I'm not a Swiftie, but boy, it sent some men into a spiral. I use it pretty often now.
DrBronxx 4 months ago (edited)
I mean, that's how I know who he is. That said, I barely know anything about Taylor Swift herself, beyond what she looks like and maybe one or two songs.
BookFanatic 4 months ago
I refer to him as "what's-his-face, Taylor's guy." Drives my male friends nuts.
nottheactualphoto 4 months ago
Nothing wrong with that. To my mind, that's the reason he's famous. It's certainly the only reason I've ever heard of him. I know what Taylor Swift looks like, thanks to the supermarket magazine covers. I don't know her music at all.
Grumpy old man 4 months ago
I honstly dont care about the queefs or pop music. Motorhead foreveer! Lemmy lives! 😆😆😆
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago
Seriously, you what? I've seen Motorhead live (3 times that I can recall) and alas Lemmy is no longer with us. He's probably responsible for a few queefs, mind you 🤨. https://www.health.com/condition/sexual-health/what-is-a-q***f. Meanwhile: I've never heard any music by Taylor Swift, but I can't escape hearing about her; then again, I've never seen American football (hand egg?) being played either. https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/handegg
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shg stewart 4 months ago
I literally only know who he is because of her. I wouldn't follow American football even if I didn't think football should be banned (because of the amount of brain damage it causes). Canadian football is an overall better game -- bigger field, fewer downs, more emphasis on strategy...
#38
“You look like you’re about to cry” anytime they are having a temper tantrum.
Stardust she/her 4 months ago
This is exactly how my parents used to make me cry lol. Sometimes when I’m a bit tired I tend to look like I’m about to cry so my parents keep asking me why I’m crying and the constant stress of talking to them ends up making me actually cry lol
Grumpy old man 4 months ago
My father (died when I was 9) used to say Stop crying or I'll give you a reason to cry. Good times, good times. Forgot where his grave is
Load More Replies... #39
Man was mansplaining something to me and when he finished I said "oh when I don't understand something I also say it out loud to try and work it out, great that you felt comfortable to say all that in front of me, do you need me to tell where you got it wrong?"
#40
They do NOT like it when you refer to their favourite sports team’s uniforms as “matching costumes”, especially if they’re also wearing a jersey.
Tabitha 4 months ago
Oh, is it Halloween already? You seem to be wearing some kind of athletic costume.
Jerusalem Cat Syndrome 1 week ago
No, the actual teams' uniforms, not guys in branded merch.
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#41
"Good afternoon ladies and sons of ladies."
Harry Gondalf 4 months ago
When my mom (or anybody) suggests something or tells me how to do something I've been doing for decades, I tell her (them) "Thanks for the tip."
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago (edited)
Spidercat: I'm a bog standard Englishman. But even I can see the point of "Good afternoon ladies and sons of ladies." - it's a riposte to existing in a patriarchal society. And one which I heartily approve of, as it happens. If nothing else: consider the effort involved in becoming a mother, compared to that of becoming a father. Hint: the latter role does not involve (approx) nine months of being pregnant followed by the death-defying feat of giving birth. (I was present at the birth of our child and had a harrowing lesson on how come than many birthing mothers don't survive - we were all lucky, that luck helped along more than little a bit by the NHS)
Load More Replies... #42
When he turns on golf I just continuously ask why our lawn doesn't look like that.
MushroomHead22 4 months ago
so many things can be said about you.. its like you all just want to make a point without thinking.
Papa 4 months ago
I turn it on occasionally on Sunday afternoons if I want to take a nap. It lulls me to sleep every time.
Michael Largey 4 months ago
Golf on television is only slightly more engaging than golf on radio.
Load More Replies... Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
Who watches Golf? It's the sport that is so lacking in physical prowess that it barely qualifies as a sport. It's the sport of old decrepit white people.
Smeghead Tribble Down Under 4 months ago
So people who aren't white don't ever play golf?
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SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
If my partner turned on golf, I’d take his temperature.
#43
I’m broad shouldered and naturally muscular with ball player feet. Whenever men tease me I just tell them they’re just jealous I’m more man-sized than they are.
Lene 4 months ago
Like UKGrandad I have no idea what "ball player feet" are. And because of UKGrandad's confusion I tried to google it. I regret that soooo much because... I actually hate looking at feet. I find them gross and yucky. And so I just feel dumb because... what else did I expect than to see lots of photos of feet? 🙈 anyways, my best answer from what I saw is that especially basketball players have ugly feet for some reason? But I don't think that's the answer that we (UKGrandad and I) are looking for.
Purple Gurl 2 weeks ago
Ball player feet, especially in basketball, often show wear and tear from constant jumping, cutting, and stopping, leading to issues like bunions, hammer toes, thick calluses, and fungal infections, partly due to tight, performance-focused shoes. Players deal with unique challenges from extreme foot sizes, such as enormous feet for taller athletes like Shaq (size 22), requiring custom footwear, while the foot's complex structure endures massive force, impacting arches, toes, and soft tissues
#44
“So how are you navigating the male loneliness epidemic? Seems like it probably hit you pretty hard, huh?”
#45
Nevermind I’ll just ask my Dad.
#46
When they mention Star Wars I love saying “omg you like Disney?”
Ace 4 months ago (edited)
Yes, and men like Disney too, your point is? Like many of these, it's only going to work as an insult if the target is precious or over-sensitive about something. Edit: I had no idea until I read down a bit that recent Star Wars films were made by Disney. I watched the very first one when it first came out quite enjoyed it, never felt inspired to watch any more since.
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Child of the Stars 4 months ago
As a woman who's been a Star Wars fan for 30 years: what's wrong with liking Star Wars?
Gen X Feral 4 months ago
Hell honey I saw the first movie when it first hit the theaters when I was 8. This chick has identified as a Jedi for 48 years 😎 Disney my asss
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Oerff On Tour 4 months ago
When someone talks about Star Wars, I like to respond with something like "Oh, I like Spock "
Saber4 1 month ago
A lot of us like Spock too. Strange New Worlds. Geeks have more than one fandom.
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MushroomHead22 4 months ago
attacking his interests because you're insecure about what exactly?
Jihana 4 months ago
Rogue One is the best Star Wars movie since the original trilogy.
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#47
“You’re acting like that on purpose?”
#48
"I love your pixie cut."
#49
One time when my partner and I were arguing, I scrolled back and copied/pasted some of his old texts to me from a previous argument and sent them to him as my responses. He crashed OUT. It was great!
Astrid 4 months ago
That's not what she did. She used his own words against him in a new argument.
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#50
"I'm sorry were you waiting for a woman to do that for you?"
#51
Short guy at work was talking sh*t, I told him to get a ladder and say it to my face.
Grape Walls of Ire 4 months ago
I also don't accept that notion that a guy's height should be the basis for an insult.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
I can’t use this one, because I’m only 5’2”. That said, I wouldn't use a looks-based insult unless the other person started it.
BookFanatic 4 months ago
Oh! My best friend is a foot shorter than I am. I'm using that line next time she's scolding me.
Multa Nocte 4 months ago (edited)
I would shit talk that fucking moron all the way to hell and back if I had the chance. Just because he's in a wheelchair doesn't mean I wouldn't insult that fascist. And let me tell you how I REALLY feel about that stupid piece of shit.
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#52
Asked an ex if he had an Oedipus complex after meeting his mom cause he consistently went after 5'5" blonds (same hight and hair color as his mom), he had to Google it before he could get mad and he's consistently went after Hispanic girls after me.
Seabreeze 2 months ago
my favorite part of this article, is all the men getting mad in the comments.
Chris Baines 2 weeks ago
I’m a man and very difficult to insult because I’m willing to accept my faults and take the p**s out of myself. I’m going to use all of these though.
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Jihana 4 months ago
Weird how I only had to read it once to understand it, and English isn't even my first language. And your use of punctuation is severely lacking for someone feeling the need to correct someone's writing.
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#53
Dude at work got mouthy about “man’s work” he’s maybe 5’3’’ I popped off “well tinker bell at least it’s cute for me to be short” and went about do a man’s job!
Gen X Feral 4 months ago
They mock us for our anatomy so turn about is fair play. Just because we have tittts we're treated like second class citizens
Load More Replies... #54
Personally I love to use “you have a lot of opinions for a guy who looks like he carries a Velcro wallet.”
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago (edited)
Hey! I've got a velcro wallet! Practical and convenient. Purely by chance, its colour scheme matches that of my motorcycle. Nothing wrong with velcro - the stuff also fastens my motorcycle boots and motorcycle jacket. What? I'm fat, I've accepted the fact I'm middled age, and I've got all my own hair. 😉🤣
Sally Moen 4 months ago
You sound like a hoot! Seems that the type of man in these posts cannot laugh at themselves. You must be the opposite
Load More Replies... Wij 4 months ago
My velcro wallet in my f***y pack matches my socks , which i wear with sandals
Adam Kincaid 4 months ago (edited)
I carry a velcro wallet purely because it belonged to my long gone father and it reminds me of him. IDC if people judge, f**k 'em. If someone this to me I'd smile
#55
Taking one of Kyle Prue’s ideas I usually say “oh so it’s like Kohl’s cash” every time some guy starts explaining bitcoin.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
Bitcoin. Crypto. It’s like astrology for men. Just use real money, FFS.
Chuck 4 months ago
Kohl's = US department store. Spend X amount of dollars, get X amount of Kohl's Cash. It's a rewards program.
Load More Replies... #56
Ask them, 'Why do you walk like that?' They'll usually say, 'Like what?'
Then you follow up with, 'Oh. Well, if you've never noticed, don't worry...I guess'. It drives them nuts.
#57
When I shake their hands I say “ ohhhh not a callous on your hand. They are so soft” they are immediately triggered.
CD Mills 4 months ago
I used to tell people that my late husbands hands were so callused that he wore his gloves out from the inside! People would smile at that until they shook his hand for the first time, then they realized I wasn't really joking. The mans hands were his most used 'tool' and they were callused and scared and strong as steel. I did discovered the people with the world's SOFTEST hands! Sheep Shearers! Why? They spend their days shearing sheep so their hands are constantly covered in Lanoline from the wool! SO soft!
The Cute Cat 4 months ago
Actually many time I get this response in college.. The reason is at that time I work as a paramedic, which actually a tough job physically but mostly not much activity that can cause callous..
megabeth 4 months ago
Im going against the crowd here on this one. It's just not attractive to me when a mans hands are softer than mine... Not saying a deal breaker but... Idk. I work w my hands a lot, they are pretty beat. ( No sophomoric jokes plz bc I know I just walked myself into a few!)
Rali Meyer 4 months ago
? what: do you want me to split firewood to (insert verb) you? I have pretty soft hands. For a mechanic
#58
We had a fight - he said that He never had so many Fights with a Woman! so I said: well, a relationship can not work when both are in the feminine Energy.
HE WENT CRAZY.
AverageCommenter (she/they) 4 months ago
She’s using the woman are dramatic stereotype on him, saying he’s dramatic and so is she
Load More Replies... #59
Don't say anything, just look at their hairline while they're talking. Make it obvious. Then don't address it. They get big mad.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
So glad to have made it to 45yo with a full head of well, currently electric blue hair.
DawnoftheDead 4 months ago
I dod that pnce to my husband when he after she started "calling me out on the carpet" for some asinine reason. I just kept glancing at his hairline until he asked me why I was looking at.
Gen X Feral 4 months ago
When they ask you what your looking at say 😂 I'm looking at an assshole
Load More Replies... #60
You have the confidence of a much taller man.
Arek Allen 4 months ago
I'll say it again: Not okay to mock someone for their anatomy. Would you tell a woman she has the confidence of a much thinner woman? Or tell her you think it's inspiring that she chooses not to wear a wig? Or mock her small breasts? I get many of these guys are doúches, but that doesn't make it okay.
#61
I once told my husband “you talk a lot of s**t for someone who hasn’t been to the dentist in 6 years.”
#62
“You look like you read with your finger.”
Al Padilla 2 months ago
When a patient on the orthopedics service needed an endocrine consult, I'd tell the trainees to keep their notes short so the ortho's lips wouldn't get tired reading.
#63
“Maybe someday I’ll get to be the girl in a relationship” haha 🤣 it didn’t go well.
Arek Allen 4 months ago
This perpetuates a lot of negative male stereotypes and outdated gender ideology, but would probably totally work against a toxic a-hole.
#64
“Do you ever wish you were taller?” Doesn’t matter how tall they are.
RomanceRadish 4 months ago
Do you wish you were a baller Do you wish you had a girl who looked good
#65
“It’s okay lil guy, my dad didn’t love me either.”
#66
Asking military guys if they like wearing matching costumes with their friends.
BrunoVI 4 months ago
This probably only succeeded in making them think OP is a loser and a weirdo. The goal here is slap down obnoxious behavior, not to be an a*****e.
Tabitha 4 months ago
These are comebacks to insults that match the source. I know. Reading is hard.
Load More Replies... Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
You could ask the same question in a lot of clubs these days. Guys just do this.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
I don’t like this one. Military people don’t deserve military-related insults.
Reset Game 4 months ago
Nah, if they're in the army say something like "so that was the bet you could do huh?"
#67
“I faked it every time.”
BookFanatic 4 months ago
Same. I used to actively try to distract myself during it.
Load More Replies... #68
When my husband pisses me off I say "okay easy, current husband" just to remind him.
BrunoVI 4 months ago
Unless it's done with the right charm. My friends' wife introduced him once as her first husband after he accidentally closed the door on her (thinking she had gone in while he went to get the food he had brought) and it was pretty damned funny.
Load More Replies... setsuriseikou 4 months ago
Yeah, my ex-husband loved to ask me if I wanted him to leave me every time I said something he didn't like. Was quite surprised when I left.
David McKendrick 4 months ago
"You're beginning to sound like my ex-husband" when you haven't been married before.
#69
Tell them they look like they can't hop a fence, then even IF they do in front of you, still say 'well, you still LOOK like you can't.'
Meowzers! 4 months ago
Most people don't need to be proficient in fence hopping as they're not typically running from the law.
#70
The absolute rage bait is saying you don't want kids.
Ace 4 months ago
Eh? I think you may need to meet a different sort of man, cannot imagine how this would work at all.
Auntriarch 4 months ago
I think it's time to look at a different thread for me
Load More Replies... Meowzers! 4 months ago (edited)
Worked for me. 19 years with my fella and no cr0tch goblins. Just gotta find a man who also doesn't want kids. (Why is c****h a censored word)
megabeth 4 months ago
You're still a baby yourself. Not the flex you think it is.
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#72
Respond to long texts with pop off queen.
#74
My husband is a foreman or superintendent something for a pipe company and occasionally I’ll ask “Do you ever wish you had a REAL blue collar job?” Or if his clothes are dirtier than normal I’ll say “these are awfully dirty for someone that sits in his truck all day.”
T'Mar of Vulcan 4 months ago
One day someone at my dad's work was talking about how long something was taking. My dad said, "Well, Rome wasn't built in a day." The guy replied, "That's because you weren't the foreman."
#75
“I feel like you’re jealous of Dave Matthews.” Bring it up when you’re being quiet together, like on a long drive. Scowl and make it seem like you’ve been trying to put your finger on it for months or even years.
Chuck 4 months ago
American musician. Band is The Dave Matthews Band. Big in the early 2000's.
Load More Replies... What do you think ?
DrBronxx 4 months ago
A huge amount of these read like those scenarios you think of in your head, and what you *would* say in that situation. Or, alternatively, the comeback you think of too late, maybe on the drive home.
Plentyofoomph 4 months ago
What an utterly bizarre article. Can you imagine the uproar if they did this about men saying things to women?
Becky Samuel 4 months ago
Hahahaha. Some men are not tall or have male pattern baldness. Hehehehe. How very original. Yawn.
Tobias Reaper 4 months ago
why is this acceptable other way around it would get taken down immediately
Bored Retsuko 4 months ago
Maybe, just maybe because women have been put down by men for centuries? Stop whining, you wouldn't last a day living as a woman in this society.
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MonsterMum 4 months ago
Some is this is just things said in bad relationships. If you constantly fight with your partner or feel the need to put them down, perhaps you need to review the whole relationship.
Dirk Daring 4 months ago
I'm now learning that today, "Crash Out" means something completely different than it does to my generation. It used to mean going to bed and falling asleep very quickly, especially after having one too many.
Misti Wilson 4 months ago
Let's just spread bad feelings all around. I swear they want men and women to score points off one another, because God forbid that we actually like each other and help one another.
RomanceRadish 4 months ago (edited)
Many of these are passive-aggressive, nonsensical or mean. A few are hilarious in the right setting.
DrBronxx 4 months ago
A huge amount of these read like those scenarios you think of in your head, and what you *would* say in that situation. Or, alternatively, the comeback you think of too late, maybe on the drive home.
Plentyofoomph 4 months ago
What an utterly bizarre article. Can you imagine the uproar if they did this about men saying things to women?
Becky Samuel 4 months ago
Hahahaha. Some men are not tall or have male pattern baldness. Hehehehe. How very original. Yawn.
Tobias Reaper 4 months ago
why is this acceptable other way around it would get taken down immediately
Bored Retsuko 4 months ago
Maybe, just maybe because women have been put down by men for centuries? Stop whining, you wouldn't last a day living as a woman in this society.
Load More Replies... MonsterMum 4 months ago
Some is this is just things said in bad relationships. If you constantly fight with your partner or feel the need to put them down, perhaps you need to review the whole relationship.
Dirk Daring 4 months ago
I'm now learning that today, "Crash Out" means something completely different than it does to my generation. It used to mean going to bed and falling asleep very quickly, especially after having one too many.
Misti Wilson 4 months ago
Let's just spread bad feelings all around. I swear they want men and women to score points off one another, because God forbid that we actually like each other and help one another.
RomanceRadish 4 months ago (edited)
Many of these are passive-aggressive, nonsensical or mean. A few are hilarious in the right setting.
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