Women are agents of chaos… In between working, cooking, cleaning, raising kids, looking good and tackling all the other things on their plates, many still find time to create a little drama when life gets boring. Often, at the expense of the men in their lives.
Whether it’s a casual quip like, “Do you ever wish you were more athletic?” or deliberately infuriating them by playing dumb about finances, ladies are digging deep in their arsenal to find ways to rage-bait men. Just to sit back and watch the male ego short-circuit and the alpha brain do back-flips.
Someone recently asked, "What's something you've said to a man that's absolutely rage bait and has never failed to piss them off?" and the internet went wilder than a guy who has just fallen for the bait. Thousands of women revealed their go-to methods for provoking men and sending them into a complete spiral.
Bored Panda has compiled a list of the best answers for you to scroll through while you plot out your next deliberate argument. Some are funny, others not so much. All are tried-and-tested triggers that these girls swear by for a quick win.
We also unpack whether rage-baiting is harmful or fair game, and what to do when you're on the receiving end of the hook. You'll find that info between the images.
This post may include affiliate links.
When men used to tell me I looked better when I didn’t wear my glasses, I’d respond with 'You also look better when I don't wear my glasses.'
Rage-baiting is the deliberate act of posting, saying, or doing something provocative with the specific intention of triggering an emotional reaction—usually anger, outrage, or frustration. That's the definition given by New York-based mental health experts, On Par Therapy.
"Think of it as emotional fishing, but instead of using worms, manipulators use your triggers as bait," explains the site.
And while social media is awash with girlfriends and wives rage-baiting their men for laughs, likes and shares, the experts warn that this manipulation tactic isn't always as funny as it seems.
I have a work colleague who is the most misogynistic guy I've ever met. One day, while he was giving one of his misinformed speeches about women, we started to argue... When he got emotional, I asked him if he was on his period.
He didn't speak to me for a week.
Misogynist doesn’t want to talk to me? Don’t threaten me with a good time.
when they tell you to smile more reply back with "you first" and when they smile say "good boy" and walk away.
In relationships, rage-baiting might include making deliberately hurtful comments during arguments, bringing up past mistakes at inappropriate times, using passive-aggressive behavior to provoke reactions, or playing the victim after intentionally pushing boundaries.
On Par Therapy's experts say that people engage in rage-baiting for various reasons. Some do it for control and power. "Manipulating others' emotions provides a sense of dominance," notes the site. Others rage-bait as a method of avoidance. Basically, they distract from their own issues by creating drama elsewhere.
There are those who lean on it as a form of emotional regulation, using others' reactions to manage their own internal chaos. While many are rage-baiting experts purely for entertainment or because they genuinely enjoy watching others get upset.
Then, of course, some rage-baiters are after attention and validation. "Negative attention still counts as attention," say On Par's therapists.
We were rafting and a man was trying to make fun of his wife for forgetting to pack his water shoes and I was like, wow that’s embarrassing you don’t know how to pack shoes and need your wife to do it for you. She laughed, he did not.
Is he a child? That's ridiculous to expect your wife to pack for you. My parents have been married for 55 years and my mom has NEVER packed anything for my dad. Because he's a grown man.
I was wearing a NY hat and he said “quick name 5 players on that team” l said “quick name 5 women that feel safe around you”.
My ex husband called me a "_" (fill in the blank) laughed and told him I'd been called worse. He said what. I said his wife.
"When people rage-bait in relationships, they're looking for reassurance," says psychologist Dr. Kavya Deshmukh. "By annoying or provoking their partner, they test whether the other person still cares enough to react. It's dysfunctional, but it's also oddly intimate."
However, rage-baiting can become harmful. "If every interaction is built on provocation, intimacy gets replaced with irritation," explains clinical therapist Ritu Anand. "Over time, it stops feeling playful and starts feeling manipulative."
He told me that women should stay home and look after the kids. I told him, 'Your salary and status in life should match that.' Silence.
A boss told me I'd look better with make up on. I told him he'd look better with hair. He just walked away and never brought it up again. Mind you I was 21, tan, fit, and living in Huntington Beach.
Whenever (an old man) asks why they sent a female on the ambulance I always tell them they’ve always relied on a woman to take care of them, why change the status quo now?
If you're the victim of rage-baiting, whether by strangers online or in close relationships, the best thing you can do is not take the bait. But that's easier said than done.
"When you feel that familiar surge of anger from a provocative post or comment, literally pause. Notice the physical sensations, the urge to respond immediately, and the thoughts racing through your mind," advises On Par Therapy. "This moment of awareness is your power."
The next step is to A-C-C-E-P-T. But that's not what you might think it means...
When an ex started a fight for no reason, I held my finger up, said, 'Wait a second,' walked away, and came back with a blanket. I placed it on his shoulders and told him, 'Now, you're super mad.'
I've never seen a man go red SO fast.
"if you can't drop your weights quietly then maybe they're too heavy for you" always sends them into a rage. But also, stop throwing your GD weights.
Referring to their lifted pick-up truck as “gender affirming care.”
On Par Therapy suggests a technique known as ACCEPTS when dealing with rage-baiting.
The "A" stands for activities. Do something engaging that keeps your mind occupied or distracts you.
The "C" is for contributing or helping someone else.
The second "C" encourages you to compare this to another situation. To think of a time you handled something similar well.
Refer to their job as a "male" job..."this is Jason, he's a male engineer."
I had a random dude being condescing about my German shepherd being “a lot of dog” for me. My highly titled, nationally placed GSD that I bred and trained myself. I said, “well they do need a handler that’s a clear and consistent communicator, so they actually do amazing with women.”
I’m 6’1” and men in public will gaggle at me like I’m a circus animal. They’ll ask me how tall I am and I’ll say something completely wrong like 5’8” and slowly watch their confusion turn to anger as they reevaluate their own height.
"E" is for emotions. Move from anger to humor or calm by watching a funny video or listening to music.
Then "P": Push away. Or mentally put the situation in a box for later.
"T" stands for thoughts. Redirect them by counting backwards, doing a puzzle, singing, etc.
And finally, focus on "S" for sensations. Hold ice, take a hot or cold shower. Feel something...
"The goal isn't to never feel angry—it's to feel it without being controlled by it," notes the site.
Halfway through them mansplaining I say “it’s fine if you don’t know, I’ll just google it.”
This is funny. I'm a mansplainer. I just get too excited to talk about stuff. I do it to men too. I would laugh at this and shut right up.
A man once told me that drinking wasn't 'cute.' I told him I wasn't trying to be cute, I was trying to be drunk, so being around him would be more enjoyable.
“Let’s talk about this when you’re less emotional”
Huh. I say something similar to my kids. Do you need to be alone for a while before we talk about this?
If a man ever ask what you bring to the table respond with “what are you lacking that you need a woman to provide for you.” F**king devastates them.
It's a date not a business negotiation! I've been hearing about these "transactional" relationships a bit here and there. Not interested. Not the kind of dating I'm into and not the kind of friendship I'm into.
Told an opinionated coworker “I’m not taking advice from a guy who looks like he owes his grandma money.” Dude flipped his 💩. Mission accomplished.
"You look like you eat candy corn"... was the best one I've heard online all week.
When he says he's an "alpha" male, I respond, "So, Team Jacob?" They never fail to crash out. Or, if they have a wolf tattoo, I always tell them that I love their Twilight tattoo.
OK, that's funny, but I barely know "team Jacob," would alpha males even get it? (I presume the point is to subtly accuse them of knowing girl fantasy books? Or is there something particularly insulting about team Jacob? And I'm not trying to act too alpha male to understand; I'm team Buffy, in fact.)
I was mowing the lawn when an older man yelled at me because, in order to mow the edge, I had to drive on the street for about two seconds. (Yes, I looked first, but he was flying around a turn). He told my husband that he should be mowing. I looked at him and said, 'My husband just gave himself a manicure (he had just finished cutting his nails), and doesn't want to ruin it.'
They both scowled at me. It was a two-for-one.
I wear hearing aids in both ears. Once during an argument I took them out, laid them on the counter and said I don’t want to hear what you have to say anymore and walked away.
I work with "an alpha" and every day I tell him I like his top (polo) or his blouse (button down). He ducks when he sees me coming but I always make a point of walking down his aisle to compliment him.
I had a customer tell me “not to get smart” with them, I said “but how would you know” *click
Easy. Stare at their hair while they’re talking. Then just say “did they mean to cut your hair like that?”
"Damn that's a lot of anger. You should get your hormones checked."
If he’s getting in your face say “imma need you to be like your hairline and take a few steps back.”
Ok, I'm getting tired of the assumption that pointing out a guy's baldness is somehow an insult.
When they approach me for my number I tell them I don't have any cash or spare change. Shocked, hurt, confusion, and they leave me alone.
TBH does anyone really walk up to a complete stranger and ask for their number? Is that really a thing that ever happens? I really hope it doesn't
I work in construction, and my favorite thing to do when a guy is crashing out on-site is to ask him, 'You're having some big feelings today, huh?' It works every time.
Ask him what music he's into, after he's done listing only male musicians and male bands, make sure to say, 'wow you're really into boy bands.'
A Nigerian lady in TT told her husband wisdom is chasing him, but he’s faster.
This is very person specific. Co-worker is Irish and thinks he can get away with anything because of it. When he really pisses me off, I just ask “remind me what part of England are you from?” iykyk
I gaslit a man for hours at the bar that I didn't know who Tom Brady was and when he showed me a picture I said "ohhhh Giselle's husband???" (This was when they were still together lol)
I’m a bartender, and when guys hold empty glasses up at me or just gesture for something, I always say, 'Let’s use our big boy words!'"
I would put holding up a glass down as non verbal communication and acceptable in a bar
I ask “If you were athletic, what sport would you play?”
Once I called Travis Kelce 'Taylor Swift's boyfriend,' unironically."
I'm not a Swiftie, but boy, it sent some men into a spiral. I use it pretty often now.
“You look like you’re about to cry” anytime they are having a temper tantrum.
This is exactly how my parents used to make me cry lol. Sometimes when I’m a bit tired I tend to look like I’m about to cry so my parents keep asking me why I’m crying and the constant stress of talking to them ends up making me actually cry lol
Man was mansplaining something to me and when he finished I said "oh when I don't understand something I also say it out loud to try and work it out, great that you felt comfortable to say all that in front of me, do you need me to tell where you got it wrong?"
They do NOT like it when you refer to their favourite sports team’s uniforms as “matching costumes”, especially if they’re also wearing a jersey.
"Good afternoon ladies and sons of ladies."
When my mom (or anybody) suggests something or tells me how to do something I've been doing for decades, I tell her (them) "Thanks for the tip."
When he turns on golf I just continuously ask why our lawn doesn't look like that.
Who watches Golf? It's the sport that is so lacking in physical prowess that it barely qualifies as a sport. It's the sport of old decrepit white people.
I’m broad shouldered and naturally muscular with ball player feet. Whenever men tease me I just tell them they’re just jealous I’m more man-sized than they are.
Like UKGrandad I have no idea what "ball player feet" are. And because of UKGrandad's confusion I tried to google it. I regret that soooo much because... I actually hate looking at feet. I find them gross and yucky. And so I just feel dumb because... what else did I expect than to see lots of photos of feet? 🙈 anyways, my best answer from what I saw is that especially basketball players have ugly feet for some reason? But I don't think that's the answer that we (UKGrandad and I) are looking for.
“So how are you navigating the male loneliness epidemic? Seems like it probably hit you pretty hard, huh?”
Nevermind I’ll just ask my Dad.
“You’re acting like that on purpose?”
"I love your pixie cut."
One time when my partner and I were arguing, I scrolled back and copied/pasted some of his old texts to me from a previous argument and sent them to him as my responses. He crashed OUT. It was great!
"I'm sorry were you waiting for a woman to do that for you?"
Short guy at work was talking sh*t, I told him to get a ladder and say it to my face.
I also don't accept that notion that a guy's height should be the basis for an insult.
Asked an ex if he had an Oedipus complex after meeting his mom cause he consistently went after 5'5" blonds (same hight and hair color as his mom), he had to Google it before he could get mad and he's consistently went after Hispanic girls after me.
Dude at work got mouthy about “man’s work” he’s maybe 5’3’’ I popped off “well tinker bell at least it’s cute for me to be short” and went about do a man’s job!
Personally I love to use “you have a lot of opinions for a guy who looks like he carries a Velcro wallet.”
Hey! I've got a velcro wallet! Practical and convenient. Purely by chance, its colour scheme matches that of my motorcycle. Nothing wrong with velcro - the stuff also fastens my motorcycle boots and motorcycle jacket. What? I'm fat, I've accepted the fact I'm middled age, and I've got all my own hair. 😉🤣
Taking one of Kyle Prue’s ideas I usually say “oh so it’s like Kohl’s cash” every time some guy starts explaining bitcoin.
Ask them, 'Why do you walk like that?' They'll usually say, 'Like what?'
Then you follow up with, 'Oh. Well, if you've never noticed, don't worry...I guess'. It drives them nuts.
When I shake their hands I say “ ohhhh not a callous on your hand. They are so soft” they are immediately triggered.
We had a fight - he said that He never had so many Fights with a Woman! so I said: well, a relationship can not work when both are in the feminine Energy.
HE WENT CRAZY.
Don't say anything, just look at their hairline while they're talking. Make it obvious. Then don't address it. They get big mad.
You have the confidence of a much taller man.
I once told my husband “you talk a lot of s**t for someone who hasn’t been to the dentist in 6 years.”
“You look like you read with your finger.”
“Maybe someday I’ll get to be the girl in a relationship” haha 🤣 it didn’t go well.
This perpetuates a lot of negative male stereotypes and outdated gender ideology, but would probably totally work against a toxic a-hole.
“Do you ever wish you were taller?” Doesn’t matter how tall they are.
Do you wish you were a baller Do you wish you had a girl who looked good
Asking military guys if they like wearing matching costumes with their friends.
“I faked it every time.”
When my husband pisses me off I say "okay easy, current husband" just to remind him.
Tell them they look like they can't hop a fence, then even IF they do in front of you, still say 'well, you still LOOK like you can't.'
Respond to long texts with pop off queen.
My husband is a foreman or superintendent something for a pipe company and occasionally I’ll ask “Do you ever wish you had a REAL blue collar job?” Or if his clothes are dirtier than normal I’ll say “these are awfully dirty for someone that sits in his truck all day.”
“I feel like you’re jealous of Dave Matthews.” Bring it up when you’re being quiet together, like on a long drive. Scowl and make it seem like you’ve been trying to put your finger on it for months or even years.
A huge amount of these read like those scenarios you think of in your head, and what you *would* say in that situation. Or, alternatively, the comeback you think of too late, maybe on the drive home.
What an utterly bizarre article. Can you imagine the uproar if they did this about men saying things to women?
Hahahaha. Some men are not tall or have male pattern baldness. Hehehehe. How very original. Yawn.
A huge amount of these read like those scenarios you think of in your head, and what you *would* say in that situation. Or, alternatively, the comeback you think of too late, maybe on the drive home.
What an utterly bizarre article. Can you imagine the uproar if they did this about men saying things to women?
Hahahaha. Some men are not tall or have male pattern baldness. Hehehehe. How very original. Yawn.
