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Attracting someone of the opposite sex can be hit or miss. That 50-50 chance can make some people strive for perfection and obsess over things they shouldn’t. 

Today, we’re talking about the things women unnecessarily dwell on to impress men—things that, in reality, only do the opposite. These behaviors range from the typical scenarios, like playing hard to get, to fixating too much on appearances during moments of physical intimacy. 

These responses were from a few men who decided to get real on Reddit a few years ago. Scroll down to see what they said.

#1

Woman using a blue massage roller on her thigh, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason at all I'm a woman but I think cellulite is a winner here. One of my boyfriends didn't even know what it was. I showed him pictures but the only thing he saw was butt.

DameBlancheFramboise , Getty Images/unsplash Report

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    #2

    Close-up of a woman having eyelash extensions applied, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason at all. Fake eyelashes

    They look like a cheap spider Halloween decoration is stuck to your eyelids.

    anon , Hayley Kim Studios/unsplash Report

    #3

    A man holding a remote control watching a soccer match on TV, highlighting what women obsess over for no reason. It’s nice if you sit down and watch the football with me, but if you’re doing it just to impress me with fake interest, I would rather you be genuine and do your own thing and join me after.

    hifromsydney , Curated Lifestyle/unsplash Report

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    #4

    Woman with a wide-brimmed hat relaxing in a pool, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason at all. A tan. After a certain point you just look like a leather handbag. Chill.

    y2kizzle , Getty Images/unsplash Report

    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    21 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In Florida one learns women who look 75 are really only 50.

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    #5

    Young woman smiling gently outdoors with blurred background, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason at all. Acting dumb to look cute...we just see it as dumb.

    LukeTheGroundwalker , Myron Edwards/unsplash Report

    Howl's sleeping castle
    Community Member
    3 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I absolutely hate when they start the baby talk. Unless it's coming out of a really baby, i have no idea how people don't find it yucky

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    #6

    I once had a female roommate tell me that men loved it when she acted all helpless around them,as it made them feel like like protectors or somesuch.

    When she demonstrated, at my request, I shuddered in disgust. Maybe some men like it, but I understood that day that I really like independent women who don't need me. Makes it clear that they're with me because they want to.

    Tuatha_Deohne Report

    Fat Harry (Oi / You)
    Community Member
    43 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yep. I want a strong, independent woman, not someone who is helpless without me. I have three stepdaughters and a stepson, and I've made sure to *show them* when I fix things (change a tyre, for example) or cook things so they can do it themselves, rather than just doing it for them.

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    #7

    Close-up of a nail technician applying polish to a customer's nails, highlighting what women obsess over. I would say all the makeup, nails and beauty stuff but I've realized that they just do it for themselves so fair play to them.

    anon , Mariia Belinska/unsplash Report

    Eastendbird
    Community Member
    4 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Finally...someone gets it and responds nicely!

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    #8

    Couple lying in bed closely embracing, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason according to 48 men. How their mid section looks during love-making. I've known a couple of girls who try to cover up their belly/love handles when it comes time to get down either by keeping their top on or hugging themselves. The truth is, if you've gotten that far, the guy more than likely doesn't care about the tiny bit of cushion you got there, he probably likes it.

    chestyCough94 , Getty Images/unsplash Report

    Zig Zag Wanderer
    Community Member
    2 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely don't care about an overhang. Happy to keep it out of the way with my nose while getting down to business.... 😁

    #9

    Close-up of a woman applying red lipstick, illustrating what women obsess over as shared by 48 men. Lips. Collagen, botox, or whatever injections chasing some fake inner tube inflated dream when really they look grotesque. Thin lips look good. Big lips look bad look on everyone and it confounds me that people do it to themselves.

    sevaninja , Getty Images/unsplash Report

    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    18 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Big lips do have a nice s****l function though.

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    #10

    Two people with tattoos smiling and talking over iced coffee, illustrating what women obsess over according to men’s views. The whole “playful but hard to get” act. A lot of guys are into it but I personally that’s a huge turn off. I can’t read mixed signals, anything mixed I read as a “no”. And quite frankly I don’t have the time or the patience to figure out someone who’s probably not even interested in me. No wonder I’m single.

    anon , Lau Baldo/unsplash Report

    #11

    Young woman with curly hair posing playfully against a red shimmering background about what women obsess over. Duck face.

    Cymry_Cymraeg , Andrej Lišakov/unsplash Report

    Dave Van Beurden
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Are we in 2011 again? who still does this?

    #12

    Black platform ankle boots worn with a floral dress, highlighting fashion women obsess over for no reason. I don't notice the shoes. Maybe I notice how they posture you, but I certainly don't notice designs or brands. Same with handbags/purses - but I do think the utilitarian "about to go on an adventure" ones are kind of cool.

    I've been told that those are status things intended to be seen by other women, though.

    mindfeces , Jordan González/unsplash Report

    Heffalump
    Community Member
    57 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The whole dressing for other women amuses me. It's a status thing, of course, the highest status being the woman who other women think is most attractive to men. And they're dead wrong.

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    #13

    Man wearing an elegant watch and dark sweater, highlighting accessories women obsess over for no reason at all. I'm a girl... but my friends do this; constantly being late and thinking that it makes them 'cute' somehow.

    IveUsedTwentyLetters , Gilles De Muynck/unsplash Report

    emorinelli49
    Community Member
    5 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh god I hate that! I’m 76 and when I was a young hippie girl, I wasn’t “into time”, so I never wore a watch. I just planned my day for one event to run into the other and I’m rarely late, even to this day.

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    #14

    Young woman taking selfies using a ring light and smartphone, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason at all. Those effects that they add to their pictures or videos, like hearts added to make themselves seem more cute. Instantly walk away.

    MettaMorphosis , Frank Flores/unsplash Report

    Power puff scientist
    Community Member
    3 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    General obsession with taking photos. Girls who go somewhere and need to take dozens of pictures of themselves, they need to be evaluated, redone, then spend time during the date photoshopping them. Or need to wait before they can eat food because the table needs to be remodeled for her food pictures.

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    #15

    Married dude here. My wife makes a big deal about apologizing for having hairy legs. It doesn't bother me in the slightest, but she definitely thinks it does. I'm very surprised I didn't see this higher up in the comments.

    If it is for her, then shave away, but I imagine it is incredibly tedious. I cannot even fathom how much time it would take to shave my legs.

    abaloneyhasnoname Report

    Zig Zag Wanderer
    Community Member
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One should NEVER feel the need to apologise for being human!

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    #16

    Close-up of a woman wearing large black glasses, highlighting what women obsess over according to 48 men’s perspectives. I used to fly small, single engine planes a lot. I took a girl with me once and she was self-conscious about her glasses and didn’t wear them and subsequently couldn’t see anything past the instrument panel and it was a beautiful fall day and I flew over Letchworth State Park.

    I knew she had coke-bottle glasses and I was still super-interested in her. I lost interest because she was too self-conscious to get something out of a thing I loved and wanted to share with her.

    anon , Evelyn Verdín/unsplash Report

    Rali Meyer
    Community Member
    15 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    do the goggles not fit over the glasses, or a diver mask? (serious question)

    #17

    Young man using smartphone in low light, reflecting on what women obsess over as shared by 48 men online. When they think not saying they are into me is a sign of intrest... I'm a dumb man, with no time to keep reading people. If you decline, ignore me and other stuff, I just don't care...


    Had 3 girls once tell me why I didn't write anymore, or went harder. And simple isn't worth it, especially if you wanna do that in a relationship.

    Cyberkite , Eddy Billard/unsplash Report

    Zig Zag Wanderer
    Community Member
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Although I understand what the point probably is, OP is really bad at putting it across.

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    #18

    Young woman in business attire posing confidently outdoors, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason at all Trying to be/act sassy and stuff like that. Not only do most men not like it, but they really dislike it too. It makes them feel like they’re raising a spoiled kid, not being with an equal partner.

    anon , PodMatch/unsplash Report

    #19

    Couple relaxing on a sofa with popcorn, sharing a moment while watching TV, highlighting what women obsess over for no reason. My partner and I were watching telly and there was a commercial for Dove deodorant. He looked over and told me that he’d never thought about my armpits. It was very romantic.

    radasfack , Getty Images/unsplash Report

    Zig Zag Wanderer
    Community Member
    2 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's romantic not to think about your partner's armpits? I guess.....

    #20

    Please don't do lips augmentation, in 99,9999% of cases girls look worse after and we couldn't care less.

    marcelowit Report

    NapQueen
    Community Member
    2 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Our lips, our choice :) we're not doing it for you xx

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    #21

    Four people gathered around a table sharing tea and cookies, highlighting what women obsess over for no reason. I'm probably older and more married than most in this thread, but my wife seems obsessed with the idea that every woman in my family has to just think she is the best.

    I get it. She's from a very tight-nit, rural family. Even extended family members like cousins are very close. When someone in their family is offended by something, they get really sassy with each other and backstabby. An example might be someone didn't get invited to go on a camping trip, and feel like they should have been invited, now they won't show up to the next thing out of spite. Mind you, these people get together like twice a month minimum. They are all up in each other's business all the time.

    So my wife is super afraid of not being liked in my family. She's terrified that if we don't go to something, or we don't buy a nice enough gift, etc, that she's going to shunned or something. But my family isn't like that. We all live in different cities and rarely see each other. We're just happy to see each other, the few times a year we do. We don't usually sweat stuff like that.

    But I think she still believes that she's letting me down and being a bad wife if all the women in my family don't just adore her. The thing is, they do. They have all loved her from the very beginning because she's great.

    anon , Kateryna Hliznitsova/unsplash Report

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    #22

    Close-up of a woman making a thoughtful face, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason according to 48 men. Acting stupid and a "save me" syndrome . Huge turn off.

    anon , Camila Quintero Franco/unsplash Report

    #23

    Woman standing outdoors in casual clothes, gesturing towards a city skyline in a modern urban setting, discussing obsessions. You're gonna get a different answer depending on who you ask, but I for one adore really tall women. Especially if they're taller than me.

    A_man_called_X , Zulfugar Karimov/unsplash Report

    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    13 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As a tall guy it would have helped my back if I had married a tall woman.

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    #24

    Man and woman at a bar having drinks, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason according to men. These responses from guys saying women should be more natural, hmm ok.. but men are more likely to approach a woman who is dressed up... hair, makeup, nails, jewelry than one who isn't

    Edit: Sorry, didn't mean to offend anyone I was making a casual comment on a general observation. It seems most guys on Reddit prefer women with little to no makeup. It's been interesting reading responses.

    Vitamin__S , Getty Images/unsplash Report

    Space Invader
    Community Member
    5 hours ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I think that also seriously depends on the situation. Someone who wears heavy makeup and jewelry in a casual setting is less likely to be approached.

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    #25

    ITT: tons of things men assume Women do to impress them and not just because they like looking cute.

    vexorian2 Report

    M M
    Community Member
    40 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This assumption made me wear baggy clothes in highschool, as some dudes in a car started to scream that I have nice legs one day when I was going back from school in a skirt. It was disgusting.

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    #26

    The cosmetics are fine, because I know it can give a woman a confidence boost, but i could take it or leave it. Now if there is no personality, or they are inconsiderate or racist it’s over.

    1_am_not_a_b0t Report

    #27

    If a woman is interested in something men are its cool but i couldn’t care less if you do mx. its cool that u do it but dont think i love you because of it. see a lot of girls fall for this trap.

    loxiscool Report

    Rali Meyer
    Community Member
    5 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    took her to a shooting range. She won - lol

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    #28

    No man cares about your eye brows unless they’re joined together or you shaved them off. Filling your eyebrows into a half inch thick square of make up is only appealing to other women.

    LILPTHEPODGOD Report

    Power puff scientist
    Community Member
    3 hours ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    disagree, think taking proper care of yourself is always good, including small things like neatening your eyebrows.

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    #29

    Heels. They make your feet hurt and if they don't fit properly, they can even cause damage and make your feet ugly.

    It would be better for everyone if you wore tennis shoes instead.

    conquer69 Report

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    #30

    Sports, I’m a big nerd myself and know pretty much nothing about any sport. But for whatever reason women who really try to I guess relate to me immediately default to talking about sports. I always appreciate their efforts in the conversation, but sadly couldn’t care less about sports so I quickly steer the conversation somewhere else.

    MONKEYMAIL Report

    Rali Meyer
    Community Member
    7 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    well, at least they have a topic! In my younger years, women complained us men only talking about cars. I asked for an alternative (vegan wasn't a topic then), no answer

    #31

    Eyebrows. They get sooo much attention.

    But that’s not all I browse.

    zutari Report

    Val
    Community Member
    3 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haaaa I love what you did there!!

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    #32

    Young man in a patterned blue jacket sitting thoughtfully on a black couch, reflecting on what women obsess over. I seriously don't care if you can make loops out of vape . I just don't care.

    benchmate , Lia Bekyan/unsplash Report

    #33

    Bearded man in yellow shirt holding a mug outdoors, sharing insights on what women obsess over for no reason at all. The majority of things listed here are done more for a woman's confidence in her self, and less for actual attention from a man. The fact that the term "dad bod" is a celebrated term, while "mom jeans" is not should be proof that men (some of you) are great at being comfortable in their own skin, while women (even after we manage to nurture and produce a tiny human) still place too much value on our appearance over reality.

    Studies have shown that men have truck loads more confidence than women (we love that you guys do! It is super attractive!)... Is it really so bad if we try to boost our own confidence artificially? I'm Not being judgmental by any means. I am genuinely curious, since men dislike our beauty rituals, but also dislike women who lack confidence. What's the guy secret to unwavering confidence? Is it a case of fake it til ya make it? Inquiring mind(s) want(s) to know. LOL.

    GRITSonamission , Yunus Tuğ/unsplash Report

    Zig Zag Wanderer
    Community Member
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think it's because most women don't worry too much about body style/type. Men, however, seem obsessed with it. The source of confidence or lack is probably the other gender, in my opinion.

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    #34

    Young woman smiling and holding a drink at a bar, socializing with friends about what women obsess over for no reason. For any women reading this: Stop trying to outdrink me/any man you're into. Unless you're bigger than him (which isn't particularly common) you're just gonna throw up over his shoes.

    Source: Have new shoes.

    Dogstile , Pablo Merchán Montes/unsplash Report

    V
    Community Member
    5 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Size isn't a reliable indication of alcohol tolerance. As a petite woman I have had to help many much larger men than me get home safely even though we drank the same amount. Lol.

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    #35

    When girls lie about their height to seem shorter, like in 6'4. Idc of you're 4'11 or 5'9 you're short to me either way.

    DR34M_K1LL3R Report

    #36

    It’s 2020, ladies. Live for yourself. Don’t let men dictate what is good or bad (or other women for that matter).

    jjxscott Report

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    #37

    Acting overly “cutsey”
    Just act like your normal self. If you try too hard to be cute, you look exactly that, like you’re trying too hard. Just let your natural self flow and a couple guys will probably like you.
    Ive known this girl try to act wayy too much like a cute anime girl, and it was so obvious she was copying the anime she watched to be “cute,” it was almost painful to watch.

    Fortnitefanboi86 Report

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    #38

    Turning off shows I don't like when she is watching then. I tell her I am gonna read while she watches it so I don't care.

    LennyComa Report

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    #39

    Coming from a guy who's preferred type is naturally pale redheads. Anything to do with tanning or make up.. Trying to change the complexion of your skin. Like why?

    BradOldridge Report

    #40

    Not a man, but my boyfriend told me men don't notice women's jewelry. I. Love. Jewelry. I don't wear expensive jewelry but have lots of interesting, unusual earrings. I get compliments from lots of women and I love them, but I can see how guys just shrug.

    7AutomaticDevine7 Report

    M M
    Community Member
    35 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think they like it, they just don't care what exact piece. Necklaces, bracelets and earrings are quite s**y, they just don't care if it's special unique piece.

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    #41

    Young woman in a green jacket and knitted hood looking at the camera, representing what women obsess over for no reason. Just "looking good" or "i look to ugly to go in there" is dumb. Its a Walmart you don't have to look like a Hollywood wedding.

    ICE-13 , Frank Flores/unsplash Report

    Zig Zag Wanderer
    Community Member
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought you had to look ugly to go to Walmart. Probably all the Walmart pics on the internet, though.... 🤣

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    #42

    Young woman applying makeup with a brush, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason at all according to men. Makeup.

    Also, +1 just for saying ***couldn't*** care less instead of could care less, f**k knows why so many people in the US get that backwards.

    Totallycasual , Fatma Sarıgül/unsplash Report

    Val
    Community Member
    3 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I like a little foundation because I have a bit of rosacea and it makes me self conscious.

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    #43

    Tan lines

    Majority of my female friends obsess over tan lines and get super self conscious over them, but if I’m being honest I think most guys can agree that we do not care if you have a beach bod tan or a farmers tan, as long as your skin doesn’t look like you spent the last decade in a dark room, you’re probably fine.

    Pizza-Tipi Report

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    #44

    Bringing up and boasting too much about their accomplishments and trying to build a perfect image of themselves in an effort to mask their less ideal aspects of their life. Sure, a well rounded and accomplished person is always a plus, but they certainly don’t go out of their way to bring them up whenever they can just to boost their self-esteem.

    SWAT__ATTACK Report

    #45

    Young woman smiling outdoors with braces, capturing what women obsess over for no reason according to men’s perspective. I must be weird, but I think a little bit of acne/braces/glasses are cute.

    anon , Hamed darzi/unsplash Report

    Zig Zag Wanderer
    Community Member
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, acne not so much, but glasses and braces tend to be an all, or nothing proposition....

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    #46

    When they think smoking is cool...it’s not.

    weinerbread Report

    M M
    Community Member
    32 minutes ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It is cool in the same way some guys think. We don't smoke to appear interesting to you.

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    #47

    I'm a woman, but I'd like to say something on this. After years of, "Honey, can you open this jar," me acting like I was the "weaker" gender... We divorced. And you know what?!! I could no longer open the freakin' jars!!! Talk about mad... Stroked his ego so much, that I robbed myself of pickles that first stint of our separation. Gals! Open yer own jars, I beg of you! LOL. Take this both figuratively and literally.

    GRITSonamission Report

    winterwidow87
    Community Member
    4 hours ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This made me laugh, flip over the jar and use a knife to break the vacuum seal of the lid. No strenght needed.

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    #48

    Variety of gourmet cheeses and grapes on wooden board, illustrating what women obsess over for no reason. Buying you tons of weird cheeses. Like I cannot fit anymore cheese in my home please stop. Cheese is exciting at first but there is such a thing as too much.

    Edit: I was unaware this is unusual. All the women I’ve dated have always bought me cheese and now I’m wondering if it’s something I’m doing.

    The_Real_Raw_Gary , Curated Lifestyle/unsplash Report

    Panda McPandaface
    Community Member
    5 hours ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, there is no such thing as too much cheese.

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